Etiquettes Ethics and Manners in Islam Part III

8/6/2019 Etiquettes Ethics and Manners in Islam Part III

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may Allah bless him and grant him peace,did not take revenge for him unless thelimits of Allah were violated. Then he took

revenge for it for Allah. [Malik's Muwatta,

Hadiths on Good Character[Has taken from Malik's Muwatta, Book # 47]

Good Character

(02) Yahya related to me from Malik from Ibn Shihab from Urwa ibn az-Zubayr thatA'isha, the wife of the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "TheMessenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, did not have to choosebetween two matters, but that he chose the easier of them as long as it was not a wrongaction. If it was a wrong action, he was the furthest of people from it. The Messenger of

Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, did not take revenge for him unless the

limits of Allah were violated. Then he took revenge for it for Allah. [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 #47.1.2]

(03) Yahya related to me from Malik from Ibn Shihab from Ali ibn Husayn ibnAli ibn Abi Talib that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant himpeace, said, "Part of the excellence of a man's Islam is that he leaves what doesnot concern him. [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 # 47.1.3]

(01) Yahya related to me from Malik that Muadh ibn Jabal said, "The lastadvice the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, gaveme when I put my foot in the stirrup was that he said, 'Make your character goodfor the people, Muadh ibn Jabal!'" [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47, # 47.1.1]

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Modesty

01. Yahya related to me from Malik from Salama ibn Safwan ibnSalama az-Zuraqi that Zayd ibn Talha ibn Rukana, who attributed it tothe Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "TheMessenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,'Every deen has an innate character. The character of Islam ismodesty.' [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 # 47.2.9]

02. Yahya related to me from Malik from Ibn Shihab from Salim ibnAbdullah from Abdullah ibn Umar that the Messenger of Allah, mayAllah bless him and grant him peace, passed by a man who waschiding his brother about modesty. The Messenger of Allah, may Allahbless him and grant him peace, said, "Leave him. Modesty is part ofIman." [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 # 47.2.10]

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Anger

01. Malik related to me from Ibn Shihab from Humayd Ibn AbdurRahman Ibn Awf that a man came to the Messenger of Allah, may Allahbless him and grant him peace, and said, "Messenger of Allah, teachme some words which I can live by. Do not make them too much for me,lest I forget." The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant

him peace, said, "Do not be angry. [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47# 47.3.11]

02. Yahya related to me from Malik from Ibn Shihab from Said ibn al-Musayyab from Abu Hurayra that the Messenger of Allah, may Allahbless him and grant him peace, said, "A strong person is not the personwho throws his adversaries to the ground. A strong person is the personwho contains himself when he is angry." [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 #47.3.12]

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Shunning People:

(01) Yahya related to me from Malik from Ibn Shihab from Ata ibn Yazid al-Laythi from

Abu Ayyub al-Ansari that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant himpeace, said, "It is not Halal for a Muslim to shun his brother for more than three nights,

that is they meet, and this one turns away and that one turns away. The better of the

two is the one who says the greeting first. [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 # 47.4.13]

(02) Yahya related to me from Malik from Ibn Shihab from Anas ibn Malik that the

Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Do not be angrywith each other and do not envy each other and do not turn away from each other, and

be slaves of Allah, brothers. It is not halal for a muslim to shun his brother for more

than three nights." [Malik's Muwatta, Book 47# 47.4.14]

(03) Yahya related to me from Malik from Abu'z-Zinad from al-Araj from Abu Huraira

that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Beware of

suspicion. Suspicion is the most untrue speech. Do not spy and do not eavesdrop. Do

not compete with each other and do not envy each other and do not hate each other

and do not shun each other. Be slaves of Allah, brothers."[Malik's Muwatta, Book 47 # 47.4.15]

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Hadiths on Manners:

Abu Darda (RA) reported that Rasulullah(SAW) said, Nothing isweightier on the Scale of Deeds than ones good manners. [Al-Bukhari]

Abu Hurairah (RA) said, I heard Abul Qasim (Rasulullah(SAW)),

said, The best among you in Islam are those with the best manners,so long as they develop a sense of understanding. [Al-Bukhari]

Rasulullah (SAW) said: The most beloved of Allahs servants toAllah are those with the best manners.

[At-Tabarni and Albani authenticated it in Silsilatul-AHaadeethis-Saheehah]

Abdullah ibn Amr said, Rasulullah(SAW) was never obscene orcoarse. Rather, he used to tell us that the best among us were thosewith the best manners. [Al-Bukhari]

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:1. Abu Darda' reported that the Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace,said, "Nothing is weightier on the Scale of Deeds than one's good

manners." [Hadith:Bukhari's Book of Manners # 271, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Ahmad,and Ibn Hibban]

2. Abu Huraira, r.a., said, "I heard Abu al Qasim (the Prophet saaws),

say, 'The best among you in Islam are those with the best manners, solong as they develop a sense of understanding.' [Hadith:Bukhari's Book ofManners # 286 and Ahmad]

3. The Prophet (saaws) said: "The most beloved of Allah's servants toAllah are those with the best manners. [Hadith:At-Tabaraanee collected it, and

Albani authenticated it in Silsilatul-AHaadeethis-Saheehah # 432]

4. 'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr said, "The Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace,was never obscene or coarse. Rather, he used to tell us that the bestamong us were those with the best manners. [Hadith:Sahih Bukhari, Muslim,and Tirmidhi]

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The Importance of Manners


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The sin of finding faults in others:

1. Abdullah reported that the Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace,

said, "A believer is not a fault finder and is not abusive, obscene, orcourse." [Hadith: Bukhari's Book of Manners # 313, Ahmad, Ibn Hibban, andHakim]

2. Ibn 'Abbas said, "If you wish to mention the faults of your friend,mention your own faults first." [Hadith-Bukhari's Book of Manners #329]

3. Ibn 'Abbas said on the following verse of the Qur'an, "Nor defameone another" (49:11), "Do not spend your time finding fault with oneanother." [Hadith: Bukhari's Book of Manners #330]

4. Jubayr ibn Nufayr reported that Mu'adh ibn Jabal said, "If you love

someone, do not quarrel with him and do not annoy him. Do not askothers about him, for the one you ask might be his enemy and thustell you things about him that are not true and thus break you apart."[Hadith: Bukhari's Book of Manners # 545]

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Group Conversations:

1.Abdullah ibn Mas'ud

reported that theProphet of Allah, upon

him be peace, said, "If they are three, two of them should not carryon a conversation fromwhich the third isexcluded, for surelythat will be distressingto him."[Hadith: Sahih Bukhari, Muslim,

Abu Dawud, and Ibn Majah]

2.Ibn 'Umar reported

the same from theProphet, (upon him be

peace and blessings ofAllah) Except that inthe end, he added, "Weasked, 'If they arefour?' He, upon him bepeace, said, 'Thenthere is no harm.'

[Hadith: Bukhari's Book ofManners, Abu Dawud. Ibn Hibbanclassified the hadith as authentic.]

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Abu Huraira, r.a., reported that the Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace,said, "Be careful of suspicion, for it is the most mistaken of all speech. Donot spy on others, compete* among yourselves, envy one another, ordespise one another. Rather, be servants of Allah and brothers!"

[Sahih Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah, Ahmad, and Ibn Hibban]

[*There is nothing wrong with healthy competition, particularly in doing good deeds.This hadith refers to completion that destroys team play and equality, etc.]

'Abd Allah said, "Sometimes a victim of robbery willbecome so suspicious [of everyone around him] that he

will become worse than the thief."*[Hadith - Bukhari's Book of Manners #1294]

*In other words, his suspicions will lead him to doubt everyoneuntil he has destroyed every one of his relationships.

Beware of Suspision:


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Hadith on Suspision:

3. Anas(r.a.) reported that a man passed bywhile the Prophet of Allah, upon him bepeace, was with one of his wives. TheProphet called the man and said, 'O So and

so. This is my wife, so and so." The manreplied, What I might have thought aboutanother, I would never think about you." TheProphet, upon him be peace, said, "Shaitan

[satan] will circulate through a person justlike blood circulates [through one's veins]."

[Hadith- Bukhari's Book of Manners #1293, Muslim and Abu Dawud]


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Give Gifts:

1. Abu Huraira, r.a.,


him be peace, said,"Give gifts to oneanother, and you willlove one another.[Hadith - Bukhari's Book of

Manners # 594, also related byAbu Ya'la and by Nasa'i in alKuna].

2. Ibn Abi Mas'ud al

Badri reported that theProphet of Allah, upon

him be peace, said,"Anyone who spendsmoney on his family andseeks blessings for doingso will find it counted as

sadaqah (charity) on hisbehalf. [Hadith - Sahih Bukhari,Muslim, Nasa'i and Tirmidhi]

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1. Abu Huraira, r.a.,


him be peace, said,"Give gifts to oneanother, and you willlove one another.

[Hadith: Bukhari's Book of

Manners # 594, also relatedby Abu Ya'la and by Nasa'i inal Kuna].

2. Ibn Abi Mas'ud al

Badri reported that theProphet of Allah, upon

him be peace, said,"Anyone who spendsmoney on his family andseeks blessings for doingso will find it counted assadaqah (charity) on hisbehalf.

[Hadith: Sahih Bukhari,Muslim, Nasa'i and Tirmidhi]

Give Gifts:


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Have a sense of shame or shyness:

Not being shy from doing good, but shyness from doing wrong

1. Abu Mus'ud reported that the Prophet of Allah, saaws, said,"Among the well-known wisdom of the prophets is the saying, 'If youhave no shame, then do as you please.'" [Hadith - Sahih Bukhari, Abu

Dawud, Ibn Majah, Ibn Hibban, and Ahmad]

2. Abu Huraira, r.a., reported that the Prophet, saaws, said, "...Having a sense of shame is one branch of faith. [Hadith - Sahih Bukhari,Muslim, Nasa'i, Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah, and Tabarani]

3. 'Abdullah ibn Abi 'Atabah said that he heard Abu Sa'id say, "The

Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace, was shyer than a virgin in hershift. Whenever he disliked something, we could see it on his face."[Hadith - Sahih Bukhari, Muslim and Ibn Majah]

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02.

Abu Huraira, r.a., reported

that a handsome man wentto the Prophet of Allah,upon him be peace, and

said, "I love beauty, and Ihave been given what yousee, even to the extent of my hating to be bested. Isthat pride?" The Prophetreplied, "No. Rather, pride

is to disdain the truth and totreat others with contempt.

[Hadith - Bukhari's Book ofManners #556, Abu Dawud

and Tirmidhi]

The sin of Pride:

01.Abu Huraira, radi

Allahu Taala Anhu,

reported that theProphet(upon him bepeace and blessings),

said, "Whoever eats withhis servant, or rides adonkey in the market

place, or who ties up his

goat and milks it will notbe guilty of the sin of

pride.

[Hadith - Bukhari's Book ofManners # 550]

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The sin of flattering or praising a person:

.

1. Aslam reported that

he heard 'Umar say,"Praise is slaughter."One of the narrators

added, "That is, if you

accept it."

[Hadith - Bukhari's Book ofManners #337, Bayhaqi, andsimilar version by Ibn Majah]

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Flattering is to praiseexcessively especially from

motives of self-interest.

Praising isto glorify especiallyby the attribution of

perfections

2. Abu Bakr reported that a manwas mentioned in the presence ofthe Prophet(saaws) and anotherpraised the man. The Prophet(saaws), said, "Woe to you, for youhas broken your friend's neck!"

The Prophet(saaws) repeated thisseveral times and then said, "If anyof you simply must praise another,let him/her say, 'I think the person isthis way or that...' if you genuinelythink the person to be that way.

The Final Reckoner is Allah, and noone can tell Allah anything aboutanyone."[Hadith - Sahih Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi,

Ahmad, Abu 'Awanah, and Ibn Hibban]


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Praying for GoodManners:

'Abd Allah ibn 'Amrreported that the

Prophet of Allah, uponhim be peace, used very

often to pray in thefollowing manner, "O

Allah! I ask You for goodhealth, for trust, for self-

control, for goodmanners, and to be

satisfied with the divinedecree.

[Hadith - Bukhari's Book ofManners # 308 and

Bayhaqi]

Regarding Fraudand Deceit:

Abu Huraira, r.a.,reported that the Prophet

of Allah, upon him bepeace, said, "A believer

is frank and decent,whereas a wrongdoer is

deceitful andblameworthy.

[Hadith - Bukhari's Book ofManners # 420, Abu Dawud,Tirmidhi, Hakim, and Tahawi]

Pray for good MannersNo Fraud and Deceit

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01. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: Charity

does not diminish wealth.[Riyadh-us-Saleheen, Volume 1, Hadith # 556]

01. A man once told the Prophetthat he had many children butdid not kiss any of them. TheProphet (pbuh) replied: "Verily,

God will only show mercy tothose of His servants who dogood to others." [Imam Bukhari'sBook of Muslim Morals and Manners]

Family:

02. "Thy Lord hath decreed thatye worship none save Him, andshow kindness to your parents.If one or both of them attain old

age with thee, say not "Fie" untothem or repulse them, but speakunto them a gracious word.

[Holy Quran, Surah Al-Isra,17:23-24]

Charity:

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QuranHadith


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The Prophet Muhammad(pbuph) said:"God does not judge you according to your bodiesand appearances, but He looks into your hearts andobserves your deeds."

Equality:

The Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) said:"Whoever suffers an injury and forgives (the

person responsible), God will raise his status to a

higher degree and remove one of his sins.[Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith # 998]

Forgiveness:

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01. The Prophet (pbuh)

quoted a person who will

face severe punishmenton Judgment day as

saying: "I enjoined others

to do good, but did not

do it myself, and I

forbade them to do evil,

but did it myself."[Riyadh-us-Saleheen,# 198]

02. The Prophet(pbuh) said,

"If you guarantee me six

things on your part I shall

guarantee you Paradise:Speak the truth when you talk,

keep a promise when you

make it, when you are trusted

with something fulfill your

trust, avoid sexual immorality,

lower your gaze (in modesty),and restrain your hands from

injustice." [At-Tirmidhi, # 1260]

Honesty

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04. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "Help your brother,whether he is an oppressor or he is oppressed." People asked, "It is right to helphim if he is oppressed, but how should we help him if he is an oppressor?" TheProphet said, "By preventing him from oppressing others." [Sahih Al-Bukhari, 3:624]

01. The Prophet also stated that Godsaid: "O My servants, I have forbiddenoppression for Myself and have madeit forbidden amongst you, so do notoppress one another.

[Hadith Qudsi #17]

02. "God does not burden a soulbeyond what it can bear. Each willenjoy the good it earns, as indeedeach will suffer for the wrong."

[Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:286]

03. The Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) said: "To administerjustice between two people is charity." [Fiqh-us-Sunnah, 3:98]

Justice

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Honesty:

02. The Prophet Muhammad

(pbuh) said, "If you guaranteeme six things on your part Ishall guarantee you Paradise :

Speak the truth when you talk,keep a promise when youmake it, when you are trustedwith something fulfill your trust, avoid sexual immorality,lower your gaze (in modesty),

and restrain your hands frominjustice."

[Al Tirmidhi # 1260]

01. The Prophet (pbuh)

quoted a person who will face

severe punishment onJudgment day as saying: "Ienjoined others to do good,but did not do it myself, and Iforbade them to do evil, butdid it myself."

[Riyadh-us-Saleheen, # 198]

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Justice

Justice02. The Prophet also stated

that God said: "O Myservants, I have forbiddenoppression for Myself andhave made it forbiddenamongst you, so do notoppress one another."

[Hadith Qudsi, 17]

03. The Prophet Muhammad(peace be upon him) said: "To

administer justice betweentwo people is charity."

[Fiqh-us-Sunnah, 3:98]

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01.Prophet Muhammd (pbuh)

said: "Help your brother,whether he is an oppressor

or he is oppressed." Peopleasked, "It is right to help himif he is oppressed, but howshould we help him if he isan oppressor? Prophetsaid, "By preventing him

from oppressing others.[Sahih Al-Bukhari, 3:624]


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Kindness:

01. A man once toldthe Prophet that he

had many children but

did not kiss any ofthem. The Prophet(pbuh) replied: "Verily,

God will only show

mercy to those of Hisservants who do goodto others." [Imam Bukhari's

Book of Muslim Morals and Manners]

02. The Prophet

Muhammad (pbuh) said:"Be kind, for whenever

kindness becomes part of

something, it beautifies it.Whenever it is taken fromsomething, it leaves it

tarnished." He also said:"Make things simple and do

not complicate them. Calmpeople and do not drive

them away. [Imam Bukhari's Book ofMuslim Morals and Manners]

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Life & Human Nature:

02. The Prophet

Muhammad (pbuh)said: "There is nodisease that God hascreated, except that

He has also createdits treatment." [Sahih Al-Bukhari, Volume, Hadith 582]

2:286"God does not burden asoul beyond what it can

bear. Each will enjoy thegood it earns, as indeedeach will suffer for the

wrong." [Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:286]

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The Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) said: One who

covers up the failings ofsomeone in this world will

have his shortcomings

covered up by God on theDay of Judgment.

[Riyadh us-Saleheen, 240]

Manners:

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A man once told the Prophet(pbuh)

that he had many children but did notkiss any of them. The Prophet (pbuh)

replied: "Verily, God will only showmercy to those of His servants who do

well to others."[Imam Bukhari's Book of Muslim Morals and Manners]

Mercy:

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The Prophet Muhammed (pbuh) said, "Religion is very easyand whoever overburdens himself in his religion will not be

able to continue in that way. So you should not be extremists,but try to be near to perfection and receive the good tidings

that you will be rewarded; and gain strength

by worshipping in the mornings, the nights."[Sahih Al Bukhari - Volumn I, Hadith # 8]

Moderation:

The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said:"God did not send me to be harsh, or cause harm,but He sent me to teach and make things easy.

[Sahih Muslim, Hadith 707]

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The Prophet Muhammad(pbuh) said:

"A time will come when the murdererwill not know why he has committedthe murder, and the victim will not

know why he has been killed."[Sahih Muslim, Hadith # 1356]

Time:

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The Prophet Muhammad(pbuh)

said: "Should I not tell you of thebest witness? He is the one whoproduces his evidence before he

is asked for it."[Sahih Muslim, Hadith # 799]

Witnessing

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Women:

The Prophet (pbuh) said:"The most perfect in faith amongst believers is he whois best in manner and kindest to his wife."


"The best thing inthis world is a virtuous woman(wife)."[Riyadh us-Salaheen, 1:280]


"Whoever hasthree daughters, cares and provides for them, andshows them mercy, will enter Paradise."

[Imam Bukhari's Book of Muslim Morals and Manners]

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Etiquettes Ethics and Manners in Islam Part III