FROM THE OUTSIDE… Y

S u m m e r 2 0 1 8 I s s u e N u m b e r 2 3 F R E E C o p y

You have all seen what Christ Church looks like from the outside. You can see our proud spire from a distance.

Why not come inside and see what the inside looks like for yourself? You may well be very surprised. The church is very large, but it is not intimidating. It has a very high ceiling, but most people don’t notice that. Our visitors instead say how inviting and cosy it feels. Most important of all, people feel very welcome - that’s what we like to be - truly welcoming!

Christ Church became our own separate parish in September 2014. The Archdeacon of Worcester, the Ven. Robert Jones, was appointed as Incumbent, with Canon Harold Goddard as

Associate Priest with delegated powers to run the Christ Church parish as if he was the Vicar. We have one Churchwarden, Mrs. Angie Green, who is also our Events Co-ordinator, Lay Vice-Chair of the Parochial Church Council and Magazine Editor.

There has always been a strong link between Christ Church and the Barnards Green community. Its tall spire has pointed people to God for nearly 150 years. The history of Christ Church and Barnards Green are inter-linked throughout those 150 years. Many of the local shopkeepers and tradespeople advertise in Christ Church’s award-winning magazine Christ Church News. The people of the area have been

FROM THE OUTSIDE…

Continued on page 3 ➳

Please stay with us…I very much hope you all enjoy reading all our Christ Church News and I am so pleased with the comments we receive. You may be aware

that new Data Protection Laws come in to place at the end of May. This means that if you don’t sign a fresh consent form I won’t be able to send out by email. So, if you want to continue to hear all about us, and I hope you do, please do so as soon as you are able and let me have it back by email. Sending the magazine electronically saves money on printing costs and saves our trees! And most importantly means you don’t miss any of our events.

Angie

PLEASE [email protected]

Look Us Up OnlineWe do have a website and this can be found at:www.christchurch-malvern.org.uk

Where to Find Christ ChurchWe are situated in Avenue Road only a few minutes from Great Malvern Railway Station.Our address is:Avenue Road, Malvern, Worcestershire WR14 3AY

Welcome

ContactsBaptism, Wedding, and Funeral Enquiries:Reverend Canon Harold Goddard 01684 563350Email: [email protected]

Churchwarden and All Other Church Enquiries:Angela Green 07756 722426Email: [email protected]

Ministry Team:We have a team of ministers for Christ Church including Reverend Canon Harold Goddard.

Pastoral Care:In case of sickness, or if visits would be appreciated, please contact: Reverend Canon Harold Goddard 01684 563350

PCC Secretary:Allan Green01684 89301518 Wedderburn Road, Malvern WR14 2DG

Electoral Roll: Allan Green

Events Co-Ordinator: Angela Green07756 722426

Magazine:

Editor: Angela Green07756 722426

Artwork: Helen Reeves 01684 541766 Email: [email protected]

Christ Church Hall Lettings:Rebecca Ramsay 01684 560663 Email: [email protected]

Humpty Dumpty Parent & Toddler Group: Rosemary Webb01684 5657087 Willow Grove, Malvern WR14 2SEEmail: [email protected]

2 CHRIST CHURCH MAGAZINE | SUMMER 2018

very generous in recent years in supporting Christ Church’s Spire Appeal, Boiler Appeal, Roof Appeal and helping to keep Christ Church open when the Diocese of Worcester tried to close it. Yes Christ Church is a large church. It can hold a lot of people, like when there is a large wedding or funeral or when the children, teachers, parents and grandparents of the children flock in from Malvern Parish School and Malvern St James for a special service or when the local Scouts parade on St. George’s Day, or when Michael Bochmann is holding one of his famous concerts at Christ Church. But Christ Church is also very cosy and welcoming. Our books, CD and DVD displays, display of gifts, charity cards and paintings are there for everyone to browse through and purchase. Paperback and hardback books for 50p - bargains! Our Saturday Book Fair is now famous!

Christ Church is vibrant, active and alive. But we are first and foremost a worshiping Church

➳Continued from page 1

Community. God has been worshiped in Christ Church since 1875! Why not join us at our 11am services on Sunday mornings. At the moment we are a small congregation but we would love to grow larger. We promise a warm welcome at all our services. “Everyone is so friendly here”, is what one first-time worshiper said recently. Tea, coffee, biscuits and cakes are available after all our services. Our organist Brian Willis is a prize-winning cake-maker who makes many of our cakes. We really want to take Christ Church into the 21st Century with a larger thriving congregation. Christ Church is the church of the Barnards Green Community. Every Sunday our bells ring out “Come to Christ Church, Come to Christ Church, Come to Christ Church”. Amid the many and varied activities of our busy lives we all need the spiritual refreshment which people can find in the warm and welcoming atmosphere of Christ Church.

Canon Harold Goddard, Angela Green and the congregation of Christ Church

…COME ON IN!

SUMMER 2018 | CHRIST CHURCH MAGAZINE 3

Saturday Book Fairs Our Book Fairs are each Saturday and you are most definitely assured of a very warm welcome and refreshments amongst friends. A huge choice of books, CD’s, DVD’s and gifts and cards, including our wonderful handmade card stall for Worcestershire Cancer Aid.

Friday 8th June 7.30 p.m. Michael Bochmann returns with Orchestra Pro Anima for A Breath of Summer with Catherine Handley on flute and Corinne Frost cello. The programme will be directed from the violin by Michael and features: Mozart, Divertimento in A K298 for flute & strings, Telemann Concerto for 4 violins, J S Bach Suite No 2 in B minor for flute & strings, Debussy Syrinx for solo flute, Ireland Cavatina, Berceuse and Bagatelle for cello & strings & Mozart Symphony No 30 in D K202. Please join us for a summer evening and there will be wine and soft drinks and canapes available at the interval.Tickets: Band A: £17 /£13 (students half-price and free entry for children aged 10 and under). From: Malvern TIC, 21 Church Street, Malvern WR14 2AA 01684 892289 Saturday 7th July 7.30 p.m. sees the return of Worcestershire Symphony Orchestra with a programme of Mendelssohn - Violin concerto, Tchaikovsky – Variations on a Rococo theme for cello, and Beethoven Eroica Symphony. The soloists will be leader, Victoria Lee and Sally Alexander, leader of our cello section. There will be wine and soft drinks at the interval.Adult £12, Concession £10, children £5 or one child free with each adult ticket. All can be purchased through worcestershiresymphony.org.uk and on the door. Saturday 4th August 7.30 p.m. Suzuki return with their joyful flute and recorder music, this is a free concert with donations for the work of Christ Church. Please join us to be entertained and delicious cakes at the interval too.

WHAT’S ON

Sunday 23rd September 3.00 p.m. Malvern born violinist Eleanor Percy & Russian pianist, Irina Lyakhovskaya. Join us at Christ Church where you will be richly rewarded with a truly delightful programme of Mozart, Elgar, Ian Venables & Beethoven’s Kreutzer. Tickets £12/ students half price are available on the door and can also be reserved by e-mailing [email protected]

AND… LOOKING AHEAD November 11th 7.00 p.m. Battles Over Ringing Out For Peace. 2018 marks a special anniversary in our history. Christ Church will be joining with others around the country, when our bells will be rung at 6.40 p.m. followed by the Last Post and informal prayers around our War Memorial to mark a nation’s respect. 100 years since the end of the Great War. November 18th 3.00 p.m. Orchestra Pro Anima return to Christ Church.

SERVICES

14th October 11.00 a.m. HARVEST SERVICE, followed by lunch in the Church Hall.

28th October 11.00 a.m. Holy Communion with All Souls Service with Canon Harold Goddard.

November 11th 10.45 p.m. Remembrance Sunday Service with Canon Harold Goddard.


AND MORE TO LOOK FORWARD TO…

MUSICIAN RETURNS TO MALVERN FOR OUR SEPTEMBER CONCERT

We very much look forward to welcoming Malvern-born violinist Eleanor Percy to Christ Church, along with Russian pianist, Irina Lyakhovskaya.

Eleanor comes from a family of local musicians and went to the Chase High School before going on to Trinity College of Music in London. Whilst studying, Eleanor won many prizes and awards including the Leonard Smith Duo Competition with Irina. They have been performing recitals together since 2000 and from 2003 - 2004, and were the Helen Roll Junior Fellows at Trinity College of Music where they studied with Nona Liddell and John Bingham. Now approaching two decades of collaboration they have developed a vast repertoire with a unique and unified musical voice.

Eleanor and Irina made their Wigmore Hall debut in 2005 to critical acclaim, and have since returned to perform there several times. They have also given concerts at many of Europe’s leading venues, including the Southbank Centre, St Petersburg Philharmonic Hall, Porto Coliseum and the Smetana Hall in Prague. In the UK they have appeared at concert clubs and festivals across the country, ranging from recitals in Scotland to being the current Artists in Residence at Eastbourne Arts Centre where they recently performed the complete Beethoven Sonatas.

Their work has been broadcast on BBC television and radio and featured on Classic FM. They have recorded works by Prokofiev and Brahms for the IMLab label and the complete Mozar t Sonatas for the legendary Melodiya label. Take a look at their web site www.percy-lyakhovskaya.com for more of their achievements!

Their concert at Christ Church has a distinct local flavour to it. Eleanor says “being a violinist from Malvern, I couldn’t resist the urge to play the Elgar Sonata which is very close to my heart. It

combines a wonderful blend of majesty and intimacy which brings the Malvern Hills to mind every time I play it.” They have also included music by local composer, Ian Venables. His Three Pieces for Violin and Piano were the first works he composed after he moved to Worcestershire in 1986 and were his first artistic response to this inspirational environment. Also on the programme is Mozart’s exuberant C major sonata and the mighty ‘Kreutzer’ sonata by Beethoven. This extraordinary work is widely considered one of Beethoven’s greatest masterpieces.

So, all you need to do is join us at 3.00 p.m. on Sunday 23rd September in our very popular venue of Christ Church where you will be richly rewarded with a truly delightful programme.

Tickets £12/ Students half price, are available on the door and can also be reserved by e-mailing [email protected] ELEANOR AND IRINA WILL PERFORM

Mozart: Sonata in C major, K296

Elgar: Sonata in E minor, Op. 82

Ian Venables: Three Pieces, Op.11

Beethoven: Sonata in A major,

Op.47 ‘Kreutzer’

Angela Green


ENIGMA DUO - Rêves d’Amour

How delightful they were, two utterly talented and very modest musicians who brought the Church alive with music. For those of us who bought their CD the magic can continue

in our own homes! It is no wonder that they both have such an impressive list of achievements when you hear how they play. This was a new duo for our audience and we hope they will return next year. The beautiful renditions of Elgar and Chanson de Matin began the afternoon and it simply got better and better. It was a versatile programme that couldn’t fail to please, with Morricone and Hess and their evocative film music, Piazzolla and Gardel with their passionate Tangos, Sherman & Sherman with nostalgic Mary Poppins and Bizet and Bartok for more passion. We were all transfixed. Harp and Violin, a marriage made in Christ Church! Be sure not to miss them on their return.

Angela Green

A doctor was addressing a church fellowship meeting about the dangers of some of the foods we eat. After bombarding them with all kinds of information, he asked “Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?” An old man in the audience quickly volunteered the reply, “Wedding cake.”

T im e f o r a sm i l e

Laurence Kempton and Katherine Thomas

FIRE AND PASSION AT

CHRIST CHURCH MALVERN

It was a chilly afternoon but we were transported to the warmer climes of Spain

and Latin America on Sunday 4th February. The weather may be warmer there but the atmosphere was equally as warm inside Christ Church. We welcomed Stella Seaton- Sims, mezzo soprano, Corinne Frost - cello, Janine Parsons - piano and Michael Jones - piano who performed an exciting programme including unrequited love and tangos with Manuel de Falla, Granados, Piazzolla and Turina. The sheer vibrancy of the music in the hands of highly accomplished performers was indeed something to savour, a real celebration of warmth and passion indeed.

Angela Green


By Robert Jones ARCHDEACON OF WORCESTER

A worldly faith?

Sometimes we imagine that our faith is about becoming more religious. However the French priest and palaeontologist Teilhard de Chardin said, ‘We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.’ A palaeontologist is someone who studies fossils, and like any scientist is an observer of things in a search to discover more about them. I think what he meant was since we are created in the image and likeness of God, as we grow as humans we grow more and more into God.

He also said, ‘by virtue of Creation, and still more the Incarnation, nothing here below is profane for those who know how to see.’ Our humanity in all its shapes and sizes is God’s way of fleshing out and manifesting

His beauty. ‘Nothing is profane for those who know how to see’: Heaven isn’t very far away, and faith isn’t about religious stuff. Indeed common humanity is the home of God: this is what Christmas is all about, when God in Jesus made his home amongst us.

So we should tread the earth lightly: We are already walking on holy ground. Perhaps that is why Jesus gives us such an earthly prayer as the Lord’s Prayer : we pray that God’s kingdom will come here on earth as in heaven; we ask God to give us our daily bread, just enough for today. In the Gospels Jesus shows us God by the way he looks, listens, speaks and touches. Galilee sees signs of heaven in everyday life.

This is why the heart and high point of Christian worship is the Eucharist, when we take the raw material of the world, bread and wine, and it is transfigured by God’s Holy Spirit and shows us God. The Orthodox Church speaks of the ‘sacrament of the world’. The poet Gerard Manley Hopkins writes that ‘the world is charged with the grandeur of God.’ And this month we celebrate the feast of Pentecost: we celebrate when the Church is born, very much here on

LETTER FROM ARCHDEACON OF WORCESTER

earth, to live the life of Jesus, very much here on earth.

Pentecost is the moment when the penny drops for the apostles and they begin to see clearly what Christmas, Good Friday and Easter Day mean. Pentecost completes the birth, death and resurrection of Jesus as the birthday of incarnate Christianity. Far from taking us out of this world, the Spirit, which brooded over creation from the very beginning, empowers us to see everything in a new light: the whole world is charged with the grandeur of God.

So let’s not become too religious: our faith is world-facing and life-affirming. St Paul even makes the great claim that our bodies are ‘temples of the Holy Spirit’: this is who we really are, spiritual beings having a human experience. The Church is being truly faithful when we live out Jesus’ message to love God, neighbour and self, seeking to encounter him not just in worship but in the faces and concerns of the people we meet day by day. No wonder the liturgy ends with the words ‘Go in peace to love and serve the Lord.’ Go where He may be found!

Archdeacon Robert Jones


WORCESTERSHIRE SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA SUMMER CONCERT AT

CHRIST CHURCH

The last few years we have been delighted to welcome WSO and their truly amazing energy and talent and this year I know they won’t fail to appeal with this programme. They played to rapturous applause last year and they enjoyed playing as much as we did listening. True professionals and our local orchestra here in Malvern performing. SO, NOTE YOUR DIARY ONCE MORE FOR:Saturday 7th July 7.30 p.m. which sees the return of Worcestershire Symphony Orchestra with a programme of Mendelssohn - Violin concerto, Tchaikovsky – Variations on a Rococo theme for cello, and Beethoven Eroica Symphony. The soloists will be leader, Victoria Lee and Sally Alexander, leader of our cello section. There will be wine and soft drinks at the interval.

Adult £12, Concession £10, children £5 or one child free with each adult ticket. All can be purchased through worcestershiresymphony.org.uk. and on the door.

Angela Green

AND ANOTHER WELCOME BACK

SUZUKI!

For the last few years Suzuki have been uplifting audiences with their accomplished and joyful performances and we are delighted to welcome then in 2018. We really would love you to join us once more on Saturday 4th August at 7.30 p.m. when Suzuki return with their joyous flute and recorder music. This is a free concert for all the community of Malvern, with donations for the work of Christ Church. Please join us to be entertained and delicious cakes at the interval too.

Angela Green


WOMEN’S WORLD DAY OF PAYERFriday 2nd March 2018

The WWFP began as separate days of prayer organised by individual denominations in America in the mid 1800s and has now become a truly international and ecumenical day of prayer.

As we celebrate WWDP a great wave of prayer encircles the globe, starting as the sun rises over Samoa, continuing on its way around the earth and ending 36 hours later as the sun sets over American Samoa.

During this time an estimated 3 million men, women and young people in 170 countries and islands will have prayed with and for the people of the country who has prepared the service. This year was the turn of the people of Suriname in South America and the service, entitled “All God’s Creation is Very Good”, was translated into over 60 languages and 1,000 dialects. In the British Isles alone over 6,000 services took place.

During the service we learned what a beautiful country Suriname is. It boasts wonderful forests and mountains and has great rivers with impressive rapids. It is a country rich with flowers and animals and provides enough food for all. The women of Suriname urged us to cherish God’s exquisite gift of creation and to commit ourselves to caring for God’s world responsibly so that we may pass it on, unspoiled, to future generations. The service included hymns and prayers relating to Suriname and we even learned a little Sranan Tongue. The service book gave us a lot of very interesting information about the country and it was good to read that women and children are treated fairly.

This year’s services were hosted by Christ Church in the afternoon and Malvern Evangelical Church in the evening. Unfortunately the services had to be postponed for two weeks due to the heavy snowfall. Sixty people attended the Christ Church service which was much enjoyed by everyone. Brian Willis kindly played the music for the hymns and songs, and Kathleen and David provided the refreshments.

Last year’s service was prepared by the people of the Philippines and next year is the turn of Slovenia, followed by Zimbabwe and then Vanuatu. I am sure we will all be looking forward to hearing from the women of Slovenia.

Hilary Berry

WE ARE PROUD

TO RECEIVE

RECOGNITION

FOR OUR

MAGAZINE FOR

THE SECOND

TIME


This year is the Society’s 60th anniversary and several of the events reflect this. There will be a display in Malvern Priory of a ‘History of Malvern in 60 objects and a short talk about these.

Heritage will be much in mind with a film show on two conservation towns, Stamford and Chichester, and a talk by long-standing member, Roger Hall-Jones, called ‘Friends for 60 years ...and more’. Malvern Civic Society started out as Friends of Malvern.

There are visits to Madresfield Court, Wilton Castle, Lovells’ Vineyard, the Edinburgh Dome and several gardens open for NGS.

MALVERN CELEBRATES CIVIC WEEK

Cricket is also included, both by a talk on the Foster family, who caused Worcestershire cricket to be called Fostershire and with a Ladies Match at Barnards Green Cricket Club with a BBQ and drinks available. What could be better on a lovely June evening.

There are talks on ‘How Printing changed the World – Gutenberg to Caxton’ and Dr John Harcup will trace what made Malvern famous throughout the centuries.

The Opening Ceremony starts at 10.00a.m. on Belle Vue Island with the Appleyard Morris Dancers followed by the official opening by the Mayor of Malvern. Prize-giving for the Schools’ Literary Competition will be at 11.00a.m. in Malvern Theatre Foyer. All are welcome to come along.

The Week culminates in a concert by the young people of the Intermediate and String Youth Orchestras. These are the musicians of the future and they are very good. Please support them.

Full details can be found at www.malverncivicsociety.org.uk or on our Facebook page, Malvern Civic Society. Programmes will be available at the Tourist Information Office and Malvern Theatres.


Dear friends.

Ascension Day, the day when Christians all around the world remember Jesus ascending back into Heaven. This was the

last day the disciples and his other friends saw Jesus face to face. His was now a spiritual presence in their hearts and their lives. They had travelled with their risen Lord; they had talked with their risen Lord; they had eaten with their risen Lord. Now they were told

ASCENSION DAY

to get on with his work in the world - from disciples (learners) they had to become apostles, men sent out on a mission to proclaim the Good News - the Gospel - of God’s love and forgiveness, just as Jesus Himself had done. Jesus distilled the essence of Christianity in two simple commands - to love God and to love other people. God’s love makes the world go round - as Christians we join in God’s roundabout of love in God’s world. One day a Vicar noticed an old man going into church for a few minutes on his way home from work. He repeated this day after day. Eventually the Vicar followed the old man into the church and asked him what he was doing. He pointed to the crucifix hanging over the Chancel step and said, “I look at Him and He looks at me - and we are both happy!” Happiness is experiencing and sharing in God’s love.

Canon Harold Goddard

Canon Harold Goddard, Associate Priest at Christ Church writes


As most people are aware, churchyards are a wonderful varied

habitat for wildlife. But what about churches like ours which do not have burial plots? Apart from church mice, spiders and the dreaded woodworm and death watch beetle, what other creatures can call Christ Church HOME? With this thought in mind, a few of us have been keeping our eyes peeled this year for birds, mammals, insects and all forms of life. Most are readily visible on visits to church.

Let us start with birdlife. Whereas wild birds have a tough time surviving in some European countries… we British cherish, admire and respect our feathered friends – instead of hunting, trapping and shooting them. Christ Church does not seem to attract many small garden birds – even starlings are scarce- but this is probably due to an abundance of larger birds from the crow family – jackdaws, rooks, magpies and some very large carrion crows (looking for road kills). I regularly see amusing- looking wagtails behind the church. Buzzards regularly soar overhead, as do Herring Gulls and Black-headed Gulls. Pride of place, and deadliest of all, is a Peregrine Falcon (probably female) which regularly strikes down pigeons in

flight and carries the victims to regularly-used plucking spots. I saw one take a pigeon on to the back of the gryphon gargoyle on the tower. In summer, he or she can regularly be seen preening feathers, perched on a turret of the tower in the dying rays of the sun. The lovely trees give shelter to harmless birds like doves and pigeons but they provide ready meals for the merciless falcon.

If you admire birds, you probably like trees also – where

would many birds roost and breed without them? My first thought was that we did not have any trees in Christ Church. But of course, we do have many adjacent; for instance, the Horse Chestnuts bordering Avenue Road. These appeared to be dying 2 years ago, due to the effects of the leaf miner moth: a foreigner which lays eggs on the underside of the leaves

and causes the leaves to have a scorched appearance. Fortunately, tree surgeons confounded the sceptics like myself by radically pruning all of the infected trees, giving them a pollarded look. However, the good news is that they are all recovering and the surgery has opened up the view of Christ Church from Avenue Road. We also have Yew trees and hedging (always associated with cemeteries) and the western tower is shaded by some lovely

trees belonging to Malvern St. James – including Lime, Scots Pine, Yew, Cedar of Lebanon and Deodar.

We are lucky in Malvern having lots of ornamental trees, especially in parks. For example, at the southside of the railway bridge in Avenue Road, where there are Cedars and Pines. Avenue Road is also flanked by London Plane; these have leaves similar to Maple and are very common and handy urban trees because

they are tolerant of pollution such as carbon-monoxide fumes and grow in poor soil. Near 2 Avenue Road there is a Monkey Puzzle and further downhill on the same side is a Western Red Cedar. Further afield… Malvern Priory Churchyard, where there is a Wellingtonia, and (one of my favourites) – a mighty Holm Oak, just inside the entrance on right

WILD ABOUT CHRIST CHURCH


hand side; this tree has been there for hundreds of years. There is a lovely Atlas Cedar just below the Post Office, which looks like a blueish Christmas Tree.

Anyway… back to Christ Church… Most of you will have seen Grey Squirrels gathering conkers from the Horse Chestnuts. There is also a handsome looking Fox who feeds off the rubbish sacks early mornings. The West Tower is home to a swarm of Carden Bees which appear in early summer; unusually they build nests above the ground, often in old bird nests, and are completely harmless unless their nest is disturbed.

I noticed for the first time last autumn that there were Mushrooms on the front lawn – possibly due to the improved condition of the grass, thanks to Darren the Gardener, and the extra sunlight since the trees were lopped. Even in the old rubbish dump beside the alleyway, I found a very distinctive and easily recognized fungus – Orange Peel Fungus. There are usually some interesting butterflies around that corner also, including the Speckled Wood (brown with yellowish spots) which appears in The Midlands in May.

These are just my random thoughts and experiences, and – knowing that many of you will also be interested in the wildlife around… I invite you to comment on my observations and let me know of any interesting sightings of your own.

Allan Green

GOD CAN’T TAKE YOUR CALL RIGHT NOW

(One of the most frustrating things about living in today’s society is the rampant increase in the use of automatic answering machines which click in when we try to seek help from an organisation. Have you ever thought what it would be like if they used one in heaven!)

Thank you for calling heaven. For English, press 1; for French, press 2; for all other languages, press 3.

Now please select one of the following options: Press 1 for a request; press 2 for thanksgiving; press 3 for complaints; press 4 for all others.

I am sorry, all our angels and saints are busy helping other sinners right now. However, your prayer is important to us and we will answer it as soon as possible. Please stay on the line. If you would like to speak to: God, press1; Jesus, press 2; the Holy Spirit, press 3.

To find a loved one that has been assigned to heaven press 5, then enter the personal number, followed by the # key. If you receive a negative response, please hang up and try again later.

For reservations in heaven, please say the word JOHN followed by the numbers 316. For answers to particularly difficult questions, please wait until you arrive in heaven. I’m sorry, the office is now closed for the weekend to observe a religious holiday. Our computers show that you have already been prayed for today, so please hang up and call again on Monday. If you are calling after hours and need emergency assistance, please contact your local clergy.

Thank you and have a heavenly day.

JOKES


A REAL SUMMER EVENING WITH ORCHESTRA PRO ANIMA…

We very much look forward to the return of Michael Bochmann MBE and his Orchestra return on Friday 8th June 7.30 p.m. for what promises to be a wonderful

summer evening of beautiful music and there will be wine, soft drinks and canapés available from our “Christ Church Bar” during the interval to add to your enjoyment! We all look forward to welcoming you.

Angie

ORCHESTRA PRO ANIMAdirected from the violin by Michael Bochmann with Catherine Handley (flute) and Corinne Frost (cello)

PROGRAMME

The next event in this popular series of Orchestra Pro Anima concerts at Christ Church will again feature a mixed programme of music from the Baroque, Classical and Romantic periods. This time, the orchestra is delighted to welcome the acclaimed flautist Catherine Handley. Orchestra Pro Anima, with its director Michael Bochmann, was launched in January 2017 and is formed of musicians who have played together over a long period as members of the English String Orchestra and who have a real affinity with one another, forged over time. Their programmes, musicianship and warmth of presentation are proving to be a winning combination. This is a special venue for the orchestra as the Church has a most welcoming and relaxed atmosphere, allowing for spontaneity and a feeling of oneness with the audience, which are hallmarks of Orchestra Pro Anima concerts.

Mozart Divertimento in A K298 for flute & stringsTelemann Concerto for 4 violinsJ S Bach Suite No 2 in B minor for flute & stringsDebussy Syrinx for solo fluteIreland Cavatina, Berceuse and Bagatelle for cello & stringsMozart Symphony No 30 in D K202

TICKETS:Band A: £17 (students half-price and free entry for children aged 10 and under)

Band B: £13 (students half-price and free entry for children aged 10 and under)

From: Malvern TIC, 21 Church Street, Malvern WR14 2AATelephone 01684 892289

A MESSAGE FROM MICHAEL

We are thrilled that Catherine Handley is joining us for this concert and the famous Bach Suite. She has a very special flute tone which is a real experience. We are playing two wonderful pieces by Mozart that are perhaps not quite so often performed and are an exciting discovery. The symphony no 30 is fresh and delightful as you might expect from a young man and the Divertimento is possible because we have the flute so a rare opportunity. Corinne Frost performs three really delightful pieces by John Ireland.Welcome to the ever warm and welcoming atmosphere of Christ Church. And please do take note of the time of 7.30 pm.

Michael


DATE FOR YOUR DIARY - CONCERT RESCHEDULED

Our much awaited concert with Michael Bochmann and his Orchestra Pro Anima, with guest Tim Sidford, was cancelled due to the inclement weather but I am delighted to say

that this will now be rescheduled for another Sunday afternoon, 18th November at 3.00 p.m., with the same delightful programme and, hopefully, minus the accompanying snow. The exceptionally talented Tim Sidford will be playing Mozart’s Piano Concerto in A K414, the programme will also include Vivaldi, Achron, Debussy, Handel and Ireland.

STUCK FOR WORDS?Two trucks loaded with thousands of copies of Roget’s Thesaurus were involved in a collision soon after they left the publishing house last week, according to press reports. Witnesses to the accident were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupified…

T im e f o r a Smi l e

SPEEDING!

Two paramedics were asked to visit a Rev Thompson, a retired elderly vicar, after being told he lived on his own and was becoming somewhat forgetful and disorientated.

They decided to take him to the hospital for evaluation. On the way there, as they weaved through the traffic with the blue light flashing occasionally, they questioned the man to determine his level of awareness.

One of them said, “Tell me Mr Thompson, do you know what we’re doing right now?” The old man slowly looked up, gazed out of the ambulance window, and replied, “I’d say about sixty-five, possibly seventy.”

T ime f o r a sm i l e


Here is a joke forwarded to me by our bilingual expert Sandrita.

A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine. “House” for instance, is feminine: “la casa.” “Pencil,” however, is masculine: “el lapiz.”

A student asked, “What gender is ‘computer’?”

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether “computer” should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give three reasons for its recommendation.

The men’s group decided that “computer” should definitely be of the feminine gender (“la computer”), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

3. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

The women’s group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine (“el computer”), because:

1. They have a lot of data but still can’t think for themselves;

2. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and

3. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

The women won.

BILINGUAL JOKE FOR THE DAY... SPANISH COMPUTER

Meet some friendly faces at our regular coffee shop they would love to see you there

FRIDAY COFFEE ANYONE? Our Friday Coffee Shop has been a tradition for a long time now. The late Mary Parry and Vicky ran it for many years and then Kathleen McQuillan took over a few years ago, ably assisted by Vicky and David. It is a source of companionship to many in Malvern and we feel it is even more important in the current days to keep this tradition going. when social contact has probably been affected by social media . For a very modest donation you can enjoy company, cakes, coffee and scones and biscuits. Nothing can beat a “natter” over coffee, it’s good to talk not Tweet!

So join our Coffee Shop, which is held in Christ Church Hall every

Friday morning 10 am to 12 noon. Everyone Welcome!


01684 540085

Memorable - Affordable – Profitable

To get started with Reeves Design, simply

call Helen for a no commitment chat on:

01684 540085

Hello, I’m Peter Turner and I would like to introduce you to my business,

Turner Landscapes and Property Maintenance

I’ve recently relocated with my wife from South Wales to live in Malvern, where I ran a successful Gardening, Landscaping and Property Maintenance business with over 25 years’ experience. I have undertaken hundreds of multi-trade jobs to very happy customers and pride myself in my high standards and customer service. I am still providing a service to my many South Wales customers but am looking to develop my name and business in Malvern and the surrounding areas. These are just some of the jobs I can do for you:-

Garden Maintenance, Landscaping and Design including – Plans, Planting schemes, Fencing, Decking, Artificial Grass, Paving, Brickwork, Water Features, Pergolas, Sleepers, Timber work, Pressure Washing, etc.

Painting and Decorating (Internal and External). Wallpapering, Coving and all aspects of Internal and External Property Maintenance and General Repairs.

Work Guaranteed, Customer references and Portfolio available.

Please contact Pete to discuss your needs on: TEL: 01684 302697 MOBILE: 07725 480974 EMAIL: [email protected] FACEBOOK: (For photos and customer reviews) @ Turner Landscapes and Property Maintenance

Our local advertisers, please let them know where you saw their advert.




OPEN TUES-FRI 9AM-5PMSATURDAYS 10 AM TO 2 PM BY PRIOR

APPOINTMENT ONLY

DESIGNS BY GARY WILLIAMSMORE THAN 30 YEARS EXPERIENCE



(David T. Spilsbury)(Georgia A. Spilsbury)

www.fwspilsbury.co.uk

12 Upper Howsell RoadMalvern WR14 1TL



alterations | repairs | more

clothing and soft furnishings

Call Wilma on01684 567297 or 07708 014537

e-mail [email protected]

AND

BEN HORWOOD

GCSE Maths Tutor23 Grundys Lane,

Malvern, WR14 4HS01684 56228307845 590729

[email protected]





Audley Care Malvern

or email [email protected]

Telephone

Quality homecare tailored to your needs

01684 214001

Audley Care MalvernAbbey Road, Malvern Worcestershire WR14 3HL

www.audleycare.co.uk

Personal Care | Domestic Support Health Management

Call to discuss the ways we can help support you or a loved one. We arealso happy to organise a meeting inthe comfort of your own home.



Documents

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