Are Expectations on Gender and Sexuality Leading to our Demise?Sexuality has always been a topic of discussion throughout the ages and societies. It has been used to liberate and restrain humans from their true potentials. For these individuals whom have been held back may regard society as a prison in which they must abide by others rules. The Middle East is very representative of these cultural disagreements, seeing as the greater majority of the society is based on the labeling of people separated by minor differences into groups. These habits have been around for many centuries, taking its toll on the people, affecting the mentality developed towards one another. It has most definitely slowed the pace at which our immediate society has evolved and has lead to our narrow mindedness. This continuous wicked cycle has lead society and its beings to conform to rules and traditions that are centuries old. Although these rules may have some point helped society they no longer seem to hold any precedence. As society has become more open to outside culture and ideology, people no longer see these past traditions and rules as being viable. Yet society still instills regulations from the past upon its citizens, making people whom do not follow them to be shunned and disregarded by the masses.Middle Eastern society in the past has dictated that certain practices and beliefs have been set in stone and will undoubtedly continue for some time, due to the mentality of certain minorities in our communities who can affect a large portion of people with their ideas and preachings. Previously when communities were small and mostly isolated from the rest of the world, many people had to conform to society or face being labeled or shunned by their peers. This is a common trend throughout where individuals would undergo drastic changes in order to be seen as normal within their society. So she cut off her nose and her legs and offered them up. In the casket displayed on satin she lay with the undertaker's cosmetics painted on, a turned-up putty nose, dressed in a pink and white nightie. Doesnt she look pretty? Everyone said. Consummation at last(Piercy 361). Marge Piercy explains the story of a girl who was tormented by society due to her apparent individuality from the other inhabitants around her. Piercy implies that the young girl consensually undergoes the surgery in order to fulfill societies demands and to feel accepted by others. Likewise I believe the author wrote to depict the pain and suffering people will go through to please societys idea of beauty and the fact that regardless people will always criticize no matter what one does. Piercy exemplifies these issues by the young girls act of desperation with the surgery. Divulging further into the issues of gender and sexuality, premarital sexual interactions are a major problem that is frowned upon by many people, especially in the Middle East where it brings about shame and humiliation. Nowadays there are procedures in which the hymen is restored, Hymenoplasty is, according to some Beirut-based gynecologists, one of the fastest growing forms of plastic surgery in Lebanon(Hankir 387). The author shows that this procedure has become a trending matter, which is done to avoid humiliation. People in Middle Eastern societies do not handle premarital sex lightly, if a woman is discovered not to be a virgin the consequences may range from being disowned to death. This seems to be an atrocious result for not following and abiding by the norm, Hankir goes on to state, virgins have asked that their hymen be penetrated and then restored again to ensure bleeding(Hankir 389). This all seems very extreme for something that although not necessarily accepted by our culture has become a more socially accepted ordeal throughout the world. As a college student or anyone of my age it would be absurd to say that we arent currently bombarded with images and inferences of sex in general. Whether it is from movies or from commercials the fact that many individuals allow these types of things to be advertised and than oppose them as soon something may happen as even a mistake is hypocritical and a double standard for society as a whole. Relationships should be based on mutual trust and honesty, if a husband believes that his wife is lying to him about this or other things than they should work through there problems on a individual case basis. As time passes we are witnessing society acting as a force that destroys an individual just because they are different in one way or another.Gender plays a huge role in economical and social aspects within society. Expectations that must be fulfilled by an individual are predominantly set by ones gender. For example if a father were to take care of his family and be the primary breadwinner, he would be rendered as positive role model and be appreciated for fulfilling his dutiful role. Whereas if he was incapable of fulfilling his role for any reason he would be perceived as a bad father thus failing to meet societies expectations. I did not follow the path prescribed for me by virtue of my birth, probably because, and I say this without boasting, I was not fit to follow that course(Beydoun 352). Here Beydoun admits that he will not become what society wants him to be, thus accepting whatever it will bring him. He is capable and well aware that what seems to be set forth for him by birth is not what will become of him, by his choice no be ignorance. The whole clan shunned me. And I was cast out like a scabby camel (Beydoun 352). In this exert, Beydoun quotes the poet Tarfah Ibn al-Abd, from which it may be understood that the speaker might have committed a crime to attain such consequences. Beydoun uses this quote to foreshadow what may become of him if he were not to follow in the footsteps of his father and become a leader in their small community. Realizing his possible fate if he were not to achieve societies expectation, Beydoun remains steadfast in his belief that he lacked what was needed to become a leader. Roseanne Khalaf emphasizes and teaches us about the stress and differences between generations. She shows that there is a wide gap between the child and parent generation, thus both the parents and society expect children to conform to traditional beliefs relating to sexual ideologies. My parents are convinced that by returning to Lebanon they will no longer need to worry about their children growing up in a promiscuous society(Khalaf 304). These days parents may believe that moving their children into a smaller society, Lebanon in this case, will help. However this is no longer the case, with the spread of new trends over the Internet younger generations experience, learn, and are introduced to a wide variety of sexual ideologies and more accepting societies around the world. Moreover as our communities and cultures begin to adapt to new ideas, the expectations that were once help begin to change as well. Society and the inhabitants seem to evaluate an individuals performance then decides whether or not it provides a positive feedback, this is based on the individuals ability to conform to its traditions. People tend to sacrifice a lot of time and effort in order to meet expectations that are not easily achieved.Throughout our lives we are constantly put into groups whether it be in school, jobs or socially; we live in a society in which every aspect of someones life is based on whether or not they fit into the social norm. Gender development is one of the most important areas of human growth. Gender roles are learnt socially and culturally, and they vary due to the environment a child is raised in and also according to their cultural and ethnic background. Although sex and gender are often intertwined they have very different meanings. Sex defines the actual physical makeup of the individual such as male or female, whereas gender is the cultural distinction between masculinity and femininity. For example Although it is a fact that, generally speaking, a women must carry a child to term for the reproduction of the society(Progner 317) shows that although things may change in some societies there are certain aspects of life that seem unchangeable. In our Middle Eastern society the dominant stereotype states that women should stay at home and birth offspring, although it may vary slightly from country to country it is still generally the overall position of the culture. In some communities where this is a dominating expectation women who do not conform to this belief are harshly punished. This harsh viewpoint on gender roles may lead many people to will themselves to conformity as much as they possibly can. Overall society places extreme expectations on how one should act and what one should believe in. With our ever changing cultural and societal views its hard not to be influenced by the world and the different opinions around us. Especially in the Middle East and Lebanon specifically, the influence of outside countries may confuse people and cause them to not know what to believe in. We will constantly have the traditions of the old generation influencing us through our parents and culture, and than also the opinions of other societies. This will continue to be an age long discussion but we need to learn as a society to be more open-minded and accept others opinions. Lastly as a community we need to be open to the idea of re-evaluating our current positions on certain age long traditions to decipher whether they are feasible in our present societies.

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