Glove News 2005: Ask not what your gloves can do for you © 2005 Gregory Gerard “Is this a joke?”“I threw that away.” “What is your problem?”

The criticisms come and go, but the mission of the Global Globe Institute (GGI) remains. We persist in our untiring efforts to raise a naïve public’s awareness of winter health – both in and outside the glove. It is GGI’s honor once again to remind you that your cuticles are more than just filler between wrinkly knuckles and unrelenting nails. Oh, you may take their spongy elegance for granted during summer’s arid afternoons – but people, winter is fast approaching; the stinging crack of dry skin is just around the corner. So friends, paraphrasing the words of one sage philosopher, we ask you: what have you done for your gloves lately?

Resist the flirtation of those 80-degree September days – like a lurking STD, cuticle cracks are waiting in the 40-degree wings. Put down the martini and locate your textile treasures – from the “junk” drawer in the laundry – or from behind the litter box in the pantry. Wipe off the dust bunnies and mend the torn stitching. You’ll grumble today, but you’ll thank us tomorrow. Believe it. We do. ~ GGI

Global Glove Institute 2005 Regional Newsletter

ROCHESTER GLOVE REGION:

From October 1 (in the morning) through March 31 (in the

evening) wear your gloves every time you are

out of doors.* That’s it.

Hand meets Glove. Happily ever after. Same old story.

*for any period of time when the temperature reaches 50 degrees Fahrenheit or greater, gloves may be removed during that timeframe, with appropriate caution.

Christmas Warms One Woman’s DigitsSanta was good to me this past Christmas season. (I didn’t realize this ‘til it was almost too late to save my hands from a Rochester winter season!) Early Christmas morning I found an odd-shaped package under the tree, addressed to me from none other than the Jolly Old Elf himself. I eagerly tore open the brightly colored, strangely heavy gift, tossed the festive bow to my cat (I know pet lovers – this is a no-no), and pulled out the strangest set of outdoor apparel I had ever seen – a pair of battery-operated, heated mittens! My first impression was “Oh boy, are these things obnoxious!” Huge, black, unwieldy things, with wires hanging everywhere, and a strap-on battery pack – lovely huh? So off they went – back into the box and placed where all those unwanted gifts go. Until one day, deep in January, temperatures soaring to a near –5 degrees, tired of cold, numb, painful fingers; sick of dried, chapped, and bleeding skin; the reality of the message Gloves Across the Globe has been communicating for so many years finally sunk in. I dug those darn mittens out of the “re-gift” pile. Taking a deep breath, and shaking off my embarrassment of being seen in the things, I strapped on the battery pack, threaded the wires down my coat sleeves, plugged in the mittens, grabbed leashes, dogs, and poopie bags, and off I went. Lo and behold – heat!!! My fingers were actually warm, dry, and oh so comfortable! And guess what? Another surprise! The “mittens” were actually gloves in disguise! The top part of the mittens flip back and stay back – thanks to some well-placed magnets, so that I can do my civic duty and clean up after my dogs. When I arrived back home – an hour later – my hands were still warm, my fingers weren’t white and painful, and my skin was intact. No cracks!

So you see, ladies and gentlemen, first impressions are not always lasting ones. The next time you find a glove notice in your mailbox and think,"Yeah, I'll read that – NOT!“, remember my story. I have been humbled into realizing that healthy hands are much more important than my misplaced vanity. Remember, folks, keep those hands covered, and never take strangely shaped gifts – including your annual glove notice – for granted. You never know when they will save your life – or your cuticles!

~Kirsten Rohl, guest columnist

The Column of Testimony

“Like a lurking STD, cuticle cracks are waiting in the 40-degee wings.”

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