How to Keep Breathing During an IEP Meeting

Pennsylvania’s Education for All Coalition

Breathing1. to take air, oxygen, etc., into the lungs

and expel it; inhale and exhale 2. to control the outgoing breath in

producing voice and speech sounds3. to pause, as for breath; take rest 4. to move gently or blow lightly, as air 5. to be exposed to air after being

uncorked, in order to develop flavor and bouquet

breathing. (n.d.). Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1). Retrieved April 07, 2008, from

Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/breathing

Four Key Challenges

Goals

Budgeting Time

Managing Conflict

Promoting Mutual Respect/ Creating Safe Space

Adapted from Martin (2005) A Guide to Collaboration for IEP Teams

“We couldn’t agree on anything.”

“There’s never enough time.”

“I feel so uncomfortable at these

meetings.”

“I’m not sure where we are going with the

IEP.”

“It lasted 2 hours and we didn’t even decide on

anything!”

“No one was saying what needed to be said.”

Some Team ConflictSome Team Conflict is to be is to be

Expected…Expected…

*Alternatives are not considered carefully.

*Minority opinions are silenced.

*Disagreements among members or controversy is suppressed.

• Disagreement about child needs, goals and problem identification

• Coordination problems

• Implementation and evaluation problems

• Communication problems

• Lack of familiarity and trust

• Lack of knowledge/skills in problem solving and collaborative team processes

• We stop inhaling and exhaling

Well managed team conflict can... *Stimulate team interest. *Allow for new ideas. *Lead to creative problem solving. *Improve decision making. *Build stronger team bonds. *Create ownership and commitment for decisions.

Safeguarding the Collaborative Process: What YOU Can Do

Tip #1: Promote a Shared Vision

Positive Student ProfilePositive Student Profile

•Asking is Affirming

• Move from My to Ours

Safeguarding the Collaborative Process: What YOU Can Do

Tip #2: Understand the Other

•Listen Actively

•Ask Effective Questions

WHAT WE OFTEN DO with KIDSWHAT WE OFTEN DO with KIDSWHAT WE SOMETIMES DO WHAT WE SOMETIMES DO

with ADULTSwith ADULTS

Wait until we have their attention Ask when we’re ready

Ask open-ended questions Ask close ended questions

Ask questions with the intent of gaining new information

Ask questions to be polite

Find several ways to ask the same question

Use limited variations of questioning

Welcome most of their questionsMake more statements than ask questions

Ask a lot of questionsBecome defensive in response to some of their questions

Ask varying levels of questionsAsk questions mostly at the knowledge level

Join them in asking questions Ask questions at them

Ask questions that prompt reflective thinking

Ask questions that require little reflection

(Lee, 1999, p. 47)

Safeguarding the Collaborative Process: What YOU Can Do

Tip #3: Communicate to Support Feelings

• Well-Meant to Well-Said

• Use Non-Judgmental Language

10 Tips for DrawingOut the Best in People

1. Ask others for ideas and opinions2. Listen well enough to ask related questions

about the topic3. Request their help when brainstorming about

a current issue4. Encourage others to expand or elaborate on

topics they initiate5. Check in to see that you are understanding

where they are “coming from”6. Share common interests7. When you have questions or need to discuss

an issue, ask when is the best time to meet.8. Compliment others in authentic and specific

ways.9. Observe what times of day are best for

individual interactions10.TELL US ONE MORE! (Petryal Publications, 1999)

10 Tips for Using Non-Judgmental

Language1. Avoid using words like always and never.2. Use “yes and” rather than “yes but.”3. Ask people to tell you more – elaborate.4. Put as much energy into listening as you do

speaking.5. Expect and welcome different points of

view.6. Ask “how” and not “why.”7. Give the ideas some “think time.”8. Explain differences rather than compare.9. Recognize your own “need to be right.”10.Remember “right” is relative .

(Petryal Publications, 1999)

Safeguarding the Collaborative Process: What YOU Can Do

Tip #4: Be Assertive not Aggressive

• Know how to say “No”

1.Provide an explanation

2.Offer an alternative

3.Show support for the other

person’s position

4. Invite the other person’s

response

15

• Use an “I” message instead of a “you” message.

• State behavior objectively.

• Name your own feelings and acknowledge those of others.

• Say what you want to happen.

• Use assertive body language.(Kampwirth, 1999, p. 92-93)

Which aspects of the student’s education was the service supposed to effect?

• Access to, and participation in school?• Access to extra-curricular activities?• Access to the general education curriculum?• Progress toward IEP goals or objectives?• Progress toward general education learning

outcomes?• Provision of general supports or

accommodations?• Enhancement of valued life outcomes?

Safeguarding the Collaborative Process: What YOU Can Do

Tip #5: Manage Conflict

•Promote processes to resolve

disagreements

•Creative Problem Solving

•Make agreements

•Understand WHY to get to HOW

Solution CircleSolution Circle