Center News

Summer 2010

WELCOME TO OUR NEW EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

IMMIGRANT SUPPORT PROGRAM (ISP) CELEBRATES ITS GRADUATES AT

MAY FUNDRAISER

Continued on page 2

On May 20th, the International Center held a fundraiser to benefit the Immigrant Support Program. Established in 2008 and generously funded by An-drew Romay and the Open Society Institute, the program provides recent immigrants with a yearlong set of classes, activities, and networking opportunities designed to leverage their talents and ease their transition from newcomer to New Yorker.

Andrew Romay

(center) with donors Peter Frey and

Caroline Shapiro (right) and ISP mem-

ber Ibrahima Sory Seck (left)

The event, held at the Open Society Institute, featured speeches by Ri-

cardo Castro, General Counsel for the Open Society Institute; Gabriella Sperry, President of the Board of Directors of the International Cen-ter; and Doreen Rizopoulos, Execu-tive Director of the International Cen-ter. Doreen Rizopoulos with ISP members; Ramadan Abakar (center) Two recent graduates of the Immigrant Support Pro-gram, Fumi Clarke from Japan and Ramadan Mahamat Abakar from Chad, also made some remarks. “This day, when we are together,” Ramadan noted, “is to me a day of sharing happiness but also a day of telling you how many important things we members receive from this pro-gram.” (Full text is on page 2.) The evening featured a musical performance by Ja-nos Balazs on piano, Adrienn Kantor on flute, David Nagy on bassoon, and Oskar Varga on violin. Selections from the pro-gram included pieces by Mozart, Chopin, Brahms, and Bar-tok. Members, volunteers, staff, board members, and guests all enjoyed the evening. We thank everyone who joined us and supported this important program.

Doreen Rizopoulos

The International Center in New York is pleased to announce that it has named Doreen Rizopoulos as Executive Director. Doreen brings to ICNY over twenty years of experience in workforce and program develop-ment. As Executive Director, she plans to continue building upon the Center’s philosophy of collaborative education, where newcomers and volunteers work together to learn.

Prior to joining ICNY, Do-reen founded Rizopoulos Associates, an executive search prac-tice focusing on the financial services industry. She was a co-founder and managing partner of Magdalin Rizopoulos, Inc., also a financial services executive search firm. She previously served as Vice President for Information Technology at Leh-man Brothers. There, she managed the global campus recruit-ing and training programs and the high school and college internship programs for the Technology and US Operations departments. In addition, she managed the firm’s career mo-bility program.

Doreen’s international recruiting experience will serve her well in creating new membership outreach initiatives, in-cluding social media marketing and hands-on recruiting at uni-versities. She looks to attract new support for the Center's established programs while maintaining our current funding base. “Non-profits are particularly affected in a distressed economy,” she says. “I believe that the International Center's community environment, affordable membership, well-trained volunteer force, and dedicated staff have kept it thriving over the past two years, and indeed over the past fifty. I intend to build upon this powerful foundation.”

Key initiatives will include the expansion of ICNY com-munity outreach, immigrant support, and international student programs.

MATCHING FUNDS CAMPAIGN FOR

IMMIGRANT SUPPORT PROGRAM A GREAT SUCCESS The International Center community would like to thank all those who have made a donation during our matching funds campaign for the Immigrant Support Program.

The outpouring of support has helped us raise over $39,000. This includes $7,900, raised by volunteers and members, which has been matched thanks to the generosity of one of our Board members.

These contributions provide continued opportunities for ISP members to build the skills they need to participate fully in the life of their new country. We are most grateful to all our donors.

Page 2 Center News Summer 2010

Summer Events

Immigrant Support Program… continued from page 1

I have been a member of the International Center and Immi-grant Support Program since 2009. This day, when we are together, is to me a day of sharing happiness but also a day of telling you how many important things we members receive

from this program. In fact, since I joined this pro-gram I have had the chance to travel several times to different places such as Washington, DC, Albany, Massachu-setts, and to have an opportunity to talk to the great personalities: Con-gressmen, Senators, etc. At the same time, I have also had the chance to visit many cultural places in NYC: museums, the Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island… The

other advantages, on the educational and cultural side, are that ISP offers its members the possibility to get to know each other very deeply and gain knowledge of everybody’s country.

I can say that I can express myself in front of you to-day because of my improvement in English at the International Center and specifically from the ISP. I really thank all of the International Center staff, and particularly Elaine Roberts for being such a good guide to me.

Finally, my great thanks also go far and near to those people who had the idea to create this program and those who are supporting it. — Ramadan Mahamat Abakar

I have taken various ESL classes in NYC since I came to this country. I can say that the International Center is the best school to learn English and experience American culture. I have met many American volun-teers here, and it is such a great chance for me to interact with a wide range of people. I learned how to effectively communicate with Americans by making some mistakes.

Without experience, one cannot fully understand American culture. Without the Center, I would not have im-proved my communication skills and I would not have gotten the confidence that I have now. So I would like to thank all of you for supporting us. Thank you very much. — Fumi Clarke

On July 16, fifteen members from the Interna-tional Center participated in an all-day career skills work-shop with volunteers from Goldman Sachs� Community TeamWorks (CTW). Three Center members, Elena Bezzubov from Russia, Eileen Fong from Taiwan, and Buyana Ulziikhuu from Mongolia offered their feedback and their appreciation of the volunteers with whom they worked. Here are some of their thoughts:

”This event was a great opportunity for us to get some professional feedback and advice about how to prepare ourselves for the job seeking process in a com-petitive market like New York City and how to succeed as leaders in the business world,”� said Elena Bezzubov. “I genuinely enjoyed learning about career pathways, interview skills, business writing, and networking.”�

_____________________________________ �

We entered their offices, impressed with their infrastructure, and we came out impressed with their

people.� ____________________________________ “While Wall Street is not in vogue nowadays,”�

Elena reflected, “�I was pleased to find a dynamic, team-oriented, and friendly environment in this powerful fi-nancial place. Goldman Sachs� corporate culture is strong, their employees brilliant and loyal. Although their standing in the global community has been shaken by the recession, it remains solid.

“�Everyone I talked with during the workshop was the best at what they do, yet extraordinarily hum-ble. It was remarkable to share a room with such tal-ented professionals. I could literally hear the excitement in members' voices, see the enthusiasm on volunteers’� faces, and feel the extraordinary energy in the room,”� Elena concludes.

�”My volunteer was a great mentor,”� said Ei-leen Fong. �”He gave me lots of good résumé sugges-tions and useful networking tips which will help me in my job search. He shared many cultural differences and working experiences with me, and I learned how to write a business letter the way a native speaker of English would.”�

Buyana Ulziikhuu felt that the workshop was �”an enjoyable and very informative event. Goldman Sachs volunteers were from diverse cultures and differ-ent backgrounds,”� she said, �”yet they were all well versed in teamwork — the corporate value encouraged in their business. Personally,”� she concluded, “�I learned a lot from their professional advice on career development but, most importantly, I learned from their culture — how to bring unique skills to the table in a harmonious way. We entered their offices, impressed with their infrastructure, and we came out impressed with their people.”

JULY CAREER DEVELOPMENT WORKSHOP

International Center members with CTW volunteers

Our New York Lives - Expected and Unexpected

a library — a pleasant surprise. In my country, access to libraries is restricted to certain users, mostly permanent residents, and the fee is hardly a decent amount. Therefore, I naturally expected the same to be the case in New York. But the service was quite different at the New York Public Library (NYPL). Even now, after being here for some time, I am still surprised by the openness of the NYPL and the richness of its collections. Its branch libraries are always welcoming and the facilities are open to everyone regardless of their resident status. — Buyana Ulziikhuu The most surprising experience I have had in New York is seeing many artists in the streets. For example, one day I took a No. 6 subway. On the train, a man sat two seats down from me although nobody was sitting between us. I felt the man was constantly glancing at me and I thought he was strange. I was revolted and I gave him a fierce look. To my surprise, he was busy sketching my profile. There were many different faces on his sketch book and they were very good. At the next stop, a man sat between us and looked at the sketch book and said, “Oh, sorry to interrupt,” the sketching man answered, “That’s OK. I’ve finished.” Then a woman got on the train and stood in front of him. He started to draw her face. She seemed to notice the man sketching her, but she ignored him. When I got off the train, he was completely absorbed in sketching. I took a good look at his face in order not to forget it — he might become a successful painter in the future. — Makiko Kinoto I studied English in Boston for three and a half years before coming to New York in January of 2010. I moved to New York not only to keep learning English but also because I want to seek a job at the United Nations in New York. Now I live in Elmhurst, New York. When I first found the house I now live in, it seemed surprising that I felt excited about a place in Elmhurst. Believe it or not, there is a huge Spanish speaking community in Elmhurst. So many Spanish speakers live together and work together. They run Spanish restaurants, supermarkets, and ice cream stores. Spanish people are everywhere. Also, it is easy for me to hear Spanish, but not English. One night I went to a Spanish hair salon to get a hair cut. I thought I would be able to use English even though it was a Spanish speaking salon. But it turned out not to be true at this place. The hair cutter asked in me in Spanish how I would like to have my hair cut (I guessed).

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...continued on page 5 Page 3 Center News Summer 2010

At our registration for April structured courses, we asked the members to write a placement essay on the follow-ing topic: Since you have been in New York, what was one of the most surprising or unexpected experiences you have had? Here are some of their thoughts. One of the most surprising and unexpected experiences I have had since I have been in New York is New York-ers. These people are the most friendly I have ever met. They are ready to answer any question and to help in any situation. They are really patient and always trying to understand my broken English. They give their expla-nations slowly and try to speak clearly. They are marvel-ous with children and pets. They care about their city, working as volunteers in language programs, parks, hos-pitals, and many other places, trying to help everyone who needs help. I am happy to be a part of them. — Anjelika Khakhaeva The most surprising experience I have had since I came to New York City is the huge population of Latinos, which means that 50 percent of people in NYC speak Spanish as their first language. I did not expect that. Many people come to New York City to learn English, but it is not easy to find people speaking Eng-lish as their mother tongue. You don’t need to speak English in New York City and, at first, I thought I would not recommend the city as a place to learn English. However, one has to look actively to find an English speaking environment such as the International Center. There are a lot of instructors here who are na-tive speakers and a lot of open discussion and lecture classes. So, while at first I was concerned about the lack of native English in NYC, now I can say that this is the best place to learn cultural awareness because a lot of people from different countries live here in a tiny area (even though America is so huge). I can learn a lot of English in NYC if I choose the right way to do it. Fifty percent Latinos means that we also have an opportunity to learn English and Spanish simultaneously. I already have English speaking friends and Spanish speaking friends. And this is an opportunity for a great experience — and that is what I am having. —Mayumi Taniguchi “How does one use the library?” a young librarian re-peated, puzzled by my question. I tried to elaborate on my request by adding that I wondered if I was allowed to read books in the library and, if so, how much would that cost. He gave me a radiant smile and started to explain the general rules and regulations on using books from open-access shelves and borrowing procedures. What I found most unexpected was the free access to

Page 4 Center News Summer 2010

Two years ago, I moved to New York from California. Not as far of a move as most of the International Center’s members face, but a pretty big step nonetheless. I was starting graduate school, to complete an MA in Media Studies from The New School. Over the last two years, I’ve studied all kinds of media, from TV to

newspapers to the Internet. Today, I am a proud graduate. But like every student, I had a lot of help, and one of the most helpful places I came to in New York was the International Center. When I decided to do my thesis research among ‘internationals’ in New York, I quickly realized that the International Center was the perfect place to be. I wanted to meet people who moved to New York from other countries, and the Center has one of the most diverse international communities in the city. Not only that, but from the first time I visited the Center, I was impressed by the warm welcome and friendly community. It’s a wide-open, comfortable place with a constant hum of voices and smiling people everywhere. Where would I find a better place to meet ‘internationals’ living in New York? I started volunteering at the Center last September, teaching a class called “Media, Entertainment, and Culture.” As an EFL teacher, I’ve taught English abroad and in the US, and multilingual classrooms like the ones at the Center are the most exciting and fast-paced. Since students are from many countries, they are less likely to lapse into their native tongue when they don’t remember how to say something. And students can also improve their listening skills quickly by listening to the variety of accents and different grammar structures from other students. On my first day in the classroom, I had 30 students from 13 different countries, including Brazil, Japan, Taiwan, Korea, Burma, and Spain, among others. Of the 19 students who told me their language background, over 40% spoke more than two languages, excluding English. The Center also attracts many recently arrived newcomers to the US. In class that day, the average length of time students had spent in the US was just over four months, and nearly two-thirds had been in the country for less than three months. Over the next few months, I talked to many students who generously gave me many valuable stories from their lives about their media habits and experiences. I met Yoichi, from Japan, who was a student at Columbia University as well as a member of the Center. Yoichi is here for one year to improve his English for his job, and while he is here, he uses video chat to talk to friends and family every week and also keeps a blog in

Japanese. The blog serves as a diary of his experience, but more importantly to Yoichi, it is a richer way to share his travel experience with friends and family on an ongoing basis. I also met Majid, from France, who was improving his English in pursuit of career goals. Majid grew up in France, but his mother is Algerian and his father is from Spain. He dreams of living and working in Gibraltar, for which he needs strong English skills. Here for six months, Majid finds that media is a way to bring different aspects of his cultural background together. On Facebook, he can post pictures from his travels, along with movies, music, and other aspects of culture he appreciates from all of his different cultural influences. Mihaela only recently left Romania to emigrate to the United States, joining her husband in Brooklyn. She was in her fourth month in the United States when I met her. Mihaela recognizes that she is at a major turning point where she must transform her media habits to accommodate her new life. As such, Mihaela’s activities reflect an orientation in two major directions, towards the past and into the future. Towards the past lies her pledge never to forget her roots in Romania, a pledge she keeps by maintaining ties with her country, friends, and family. At the same time, she is moving forward to establish a new life in the US on a personal, professional, and national level. Mihaela keeps a different email address for each aspect of her life. These students and others gave me rich stories that helped me understand how media can help people maintain their communities of family and friends around the world. But even having all the media in the world – TV, cell phones, instant messenger, Facebook – cannot replace the International Center as the perfect place to meet people face to face.

Celebrating Our Center Community The International Center

Through Diverse Voices — A Rich Community

By Deepthi Welaratna

How I Found the International Center When I was asked to write my feelings about the Center, my pen couldn’t write anything because some feelings can’t be described in words. The same is happening to me right now. When I came to New York City, I thought I was a lost child because the city was too huge for me and life here is really fast. Also, I thought studying would be hard among people I didn’t know. I really missed my life back in my country, especially my friends. I said to myself that I should compromise, since here I couldn’t find friends and those precious moments of my life. But I was totally wrong. The place where I wanted to study actually existed in New York. It is called the International Center. When I got the membership and when I entered the Center, I felt the positive energy around me. I met countless new people from around the world who were so friendly and caring. Everyone was helpful in my learning English. I can’t forget to mention our respected teachers who are so warm, kind, and help-ful and highly educated, with a good sense of humor. They are real friendly Americans. In these six months, my personality totally changed. I got more confident about my language skills and I don’t feel shy while speaking English anymore. I really learned a lot about New York life and American culture. I can say that in the International Center you can study with pleasure, and I am so grateful to all the staff for giving me the opportunity to study here. I have collected unforgettable memories which I will cherish throughout my life. — Anonymous

Doughboy

By Gresy Lopez The first time I heard about Doughboy what came to mind was the shape and the image of a baked product like a dough-nut or a cake. I became curious about what that might be and decided to find out. You may want to take a virtual or a real trip to find out for yourself. So, before or after having a good time at the In-ternational Center, an interesting thing you can do is to enjoy

our neighborhood. For instance, you can discover what a Doughboy is. You can start by looking around and try to get to Chel-sea Park; it is one of the most popu-lar and widely used parks in the city. If you need a hint, it is located between 9th and 10th Ave-nues and between West 27th and West 28th Streets. That means, walking from ICNY go straight to 9th Avenue, make a right and walk more or less four blocks, and you will be there in no time.

Chelsea Park has a prominent place in the his-tory of the neighborhood. It is a beautiful place to take time to relax in; find a comfortable spot to read a nice book; get inspi-ration to do your homework; play basketball; ride a bicycle; or maybe find an enigmatic New Yorker to practice English with. Whatever you do, do not forget the real purpose of go-ing to Chelsea Park: it is to visit what has become the center-piece of the park, the Doughboy. The Chelsea Memorial Committee gave as a donation to the park the World War I memorial, known as the Chelsea Doughboy statue. For us, and for Americans who will follow, Doughboy was a nickname given to a man, a soldier, or a sailor who fought in several wars to make the world safer. The term Doughboy still remains in question; so far it has some very different meanings. If you are still in doubt or you are as curious as I was, go to Chelsea Park and find this monument or at least read about it. Learning something new everyday is always good and interesting for you and for all of us.

Page 5 Center News Summer 2010

Our New York Neighborhood – Chelsea

Our lives expected and unexpected... continued from page 3 This was an embarrassing moment for me. However, there was no alternative — I could not go to another place. So, I used body language and simple English words to explain to him what I wanted. Fortunately, it worked. And I had a won-derful hair style like a Spanish man. After this experience I became aware of the fact that I would be able to live in New York without English. Perhaps I should learn Spanish rather than English in Elmhurst, New York. — Soonhong Park I moved to New York from Moscow, Russia, a year ago to start a new page of my life. When I arrived, I was trying to explore the city by myself, and to look for ways to continue my educa-tion or career. This is hard to do when you barely speak Eng-lish and do not have a lot of money. But I was surprised to find how many things you can do for free. You just need to do research and look for such possibilities using the Internet and word-of-mouth. My experience started with freebies. I signed up with top special sites and found out how to get free tickets for the movies. I enjoyed visiting Central Park for free Met concerts. Now I attend three places to improve my English for free. It became one of my strong interests to take advantage of and really appreciate these opportunities which New York offers for everyone. You just need to have a keen eye, willingness to achieve, and love of adventure. — Elena Bezzubov I am very happy in New York. I feel excited whenever I walk around and visit many places. But the most surprising experi-ence for me was my first visit to a New York supermarket. I LOVE cooking and want to be good at using various exotic ingredients. In my country (Korea) one cannot find very many different kinds of ingredients. In Korea, I used to get informa-tion on various unusual herbs and other food stuffs from books or the Internet, and would just imagine how they would taste and smell. But I am in New York and I don’t have to just imag-ine any more. There are so many immigrants from various cul-tures in New York that one can get almost every ingredient in the world at a supermarket here. I was very happy when I bought a bunch of chives for just 80 cents. In Korea that would have been about $10! Before I go back to Korea, I want to learn about all the foods you can get at a supermarket here. — Jongik Ra I have been living in New York for nearly ten months and I have met many different people with varied backgrounds. One unique characteristic of the people in New York, I think, is the courage they have to pursue their dreams. When I talk to them, they often dare to show their passion, their plans, their thoughts, and their dreams, no matter if they may come true or not. “Just do it!” is the slogan. Someone told me he wanted to be a great artist. Someone else told me he will work for global peace and devel-opment. Someone wanted to be a successful businessman. All their passions inspired me and made me feel that if I don’t have a dream, whether I put it into action or not, I am wasting my life. This special characteristic of New Yorkers surprised me. And it was really a delightful surprise. — Hui Dong (Freedom) Zhou

Page 6 Center News Summer 2010

activities and jobs lived. One evening, when I was about seven, my father and I arrived at one of those houses when he said, “You must go and bring those cows back here.” I tried to get off the horse but he put me back in the saddle and said, “You must take the horse.” I was scared but he insisted. He spurred on the horse so that it began to gallop behind the cows. Since I could not reach the stirrups to stay on, my only chance was to hold on tightly to the saddle as the horse went galloping across the fields. I had all kinds of feelings: good and bad ones, scary and happy ones as well. It was difficult but exciting. I almost fell off the horse. In the end, I did not bring in the cows, somebody else did, but it was my first time riding alone. Later, I was to become a very good rider. If I tried to ride the horse after lunch my father would say, “You are going to kill the horse if you are only galloping all the time and not giving the horse time to rest.” So I went to the river to relax until I was able to ride my horse again. Riding was my most favorite activity, and if I could have made a decision, I would have slept with the horses. During all my school years I went to the farm on vacation. My siblings preferred most of the time to stay at home, spending their vacation time in the city with my mom taking care of them. When they decided to come to the farm to enjoy some of their free time there, they came along with my father and me. And that was very nice. Later during the day, just before 6:00 p.m., we would go to sit under the mango trees to enjoy the sunset and the beautiful view of the valley, and watch the cows return on their own to sleep next to the house. Dinner was almost always the same every evening: red beans, white rice, meat, and fried plantains – everything with the characteristic taste of the wood stove. After dinner, we loved to go outside to look at the stars, sometimes catching a passing satellite if the sky was clear. While watching the cows lie down on the ground, my father would tell us interesting stories about himself or his childhood or about important historical events. At 8:00 p.m., everyone went to sleep. I was so tired after busy days like that, but I knew I had to wake up early again the next morning. Of course, it was to enjoy more adventures on my favorite white horse. Those were very nice times when my father taught me about his passion and his life as a farmer. Sometimes he was strict about getting me up early, cutting the grass with the workers, or taking care of the animals. But ultimately, his requirements were formative for me and made me strong to confront life. I loved this farm so much that I decided to study animal husbandry at the university to keep the adventure going.

Esperanza: A drawing by Alberto’s sister

Summer Vacations at Esperanza By Alberto Ramirez

The river sound was strong but, at the same time, far away. Cows and calves were calling each other, birds were chirping.

Alberto now……………...and then ______________ The cock was crowing and all nature was ready to welcome a new day — and my father was ready to wake me up. “Hey you, if you want to have fresh milk, you have to wake up right now because I am not going to bring it to you. Don’t be lazy!” So I got up at 5:00a.m.,during milking time, went to the stable to play with the calves, and tasted a delicious glass of milk with bocadillo (guava jelly). Some days I decide not to wake up early and nevertheless my father brought my glass of milk to my bedroom. At 7:30 a.m., two or three mules were being loaded with the milk which had to be picked up at the roadside by 8:00. A guy in his truck came by to get the milk to sell later in the neighboring counties. Then at 8:00 a.m., breakfast was ready in the kitchen. Since there was only a wood stove in the kitchen, it took the women on the farm three or more hours to prepare breakfast for everybody. The taste was, of course, different and delicious: hot chocolate, scrambled eggs with onions and tomatoes, and arepas (traditional corn tortillas) with butter. Later, it was time to saddle my father’s horse. We went all around the farm with my sitting on the back of his horse. These were scary moments because my father did not always keep to the main road. He chose his own way going up and down the mountains and sometimes I fell off the horse. Then he would say: “Pare y vuelva y monte” – “Stand up and ride.” Whenever we passed the different fields he would ask me to count all the cows. It was not easy for me because I had started only recently to go to kindergarten. He would say, “Try again,” and I did it until we agreed on the right count. Around 11:00 a.m., all the workers’ children and I went down to the river to enjoy the water, trying to learn how to swim. As a snack we usually brought delicious mangos and crunchy green tomatoes. The river was big and strong but we looked for special places on the shore where we built little pools with rocks. Like all children we loved the water. The farm where we lived included three small houses in different areas where the workers in charge of different

Remembering...

.

Page 7 Center News Summer 2010

Mother , Wife , Individual — What does it mean to be a woman?

By Yuko Ito

“Which gender would you choose if you were born again?” My friend asked me that question when I was 16. I answered, “I would choose to be a woman without hesitation.” I loved to live as a woman. I enjoyed cos-metics and shopping and chatting with my friends. So I wanted to continue such wonderful days.

After I gradu-ated from the univer-sity, I entered a cos-metic company, and became an instructor who promoted new items to sales people and taught make-up classes. I really liked my job and also en-joyed seeing women from all walks of life. There were career women who were

single; others balanced a career with marriage. In my company, women had career advancement opportuni-ties; many were managers. I longed to be a woman who had a career and was independent. But when I was in my mid-20's, my parents of-ten asked me when I intended to get married. In Japan, Christmas cake goes on sale after the 25th of Decem-ber. So if a single woman is over 25 years old, people jokingly call her 'Christmas cake' because she has missed out on the peak of marriage opportunities. Now people marry later. But at that time I was torn between my career and marriage — I was worried that people would soon be calling me “Christmas cake.” Finally I decided I could marry and continue my job. I thought I could twin-track my career with my husband's. I was able to work successfully until I had my first baby. I found out how difficult it was to continue my job. In Japan, raising children and doing housework are still considered mostly women’s work. Of course it depends on family circumstances. But my husband is a busy surgeon. He always worked 15 hours a day and was on call 24 hours a day. Even on weekends, he had to go to a hospital to see his patients. So in my family, housework was definitely my role. In addition, he was on the staff at a university hospital, where young doctors are required to transfer to many hospitals in a short time to experience a lot of different kinds of cases. We had to move three times in Japan and once to the U.S.A. in my first five years of

Discovering... marriage. My family situation didn’t allow me to con-tinue working. So I decided to quit my job. Then I really felt the transition of a woman’s life. In my country after people become parents, we call each other “Father” or “Mother.” I became “MOTHER.” And sometimes I forgot I was a wife and a woman. My life was totally changed. I had a lot of things to do for my family: cooking breakfast, lunch and dinner, cleaning, buying groceries, taking our son to school and picking him up, cleaning him up and teaching him to count and to speak Japanese and English, toilet training him … I really enjoyed his pro-gress. But I didn't have time for myself, not even to use make-up. In 2009, I had the opportunity to move to the U.S.A. because my husband has a fellowship in New York. Then I discovered two different ways to think about being a woman. First, here in NYC husbands help with housework even though they work hard. Es-pecially in my parents' generation, traditionally Japa-nese men don’t help with housework. Although that is changing, I never asked my husband to help with housework in Japan. If my husband said, “The room is messy,” I would say, “I am sorry. I will tidy up.” But here in New York when he said the same thing I could say, “If you feel so, you have to help me to clean up.” Now I have noticed that if he helps me do housework, I can feel more comfortable and have more time. _____________________________

Living in The USA has broadened my vision… Now I realize I can live as a mother, a wife,

and an individual. _______________________________ Second, I have observed that in New York people make much of the relationship between hus-bands and wives, even when they become parents or when they get old. I sometimes can see elderly cou-ples who hold hands like lovers. In Japan I’ve never seen this happen. Also, most Japanese keep the peo-ple in their families separate from the people in their jobs. We work longer hours and we often go out to dinner with business partners, so Japanese couples spend less time together than Americans. In the U.S.A., when my husband’s colleagues have parties, they invite the whole family. Now I share the fun with him. In Japan my husband would go to parties alone. Since I have been here I have realized the im-portance of spending more time with my husband, because I know that someday in the future our chil-dren will grow up and leave us. I used to tell myself I have to live only as a mother. But living in the U.S.A. has broadened my vision, so I can have a sense of ful-fillment. I want to resume my place as a person be-yond my family. Now I realize I can live as a mother, a wife, and an individual.

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Page 8 Center News Summer 2010

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Saturday 9:30 AM — 3:30 PM CLOSED SUNDAYS

Theater Desk Hours (Subject to change) Tuesday — Friday

12:00-3:00 PM; 3:30-6:30 PM

Computer Lab Hours Monday — Friday

12:00 PM — 7:00 PM CLOSED SATURDAYS

For a list of staff emails, please see our website:

www.intlcenter.org/staff.htm

The Heidi Handman Scholarship Fund J. Stephen Sheppard

Mira N. Erickson

Gary Alaimo Anonymous Barbara Appel Carol Barker Alison Barr Howard Lucie Benedikt Neema Bollampally Sondra Brooks Richard Cahn Claudia Churnetski Malcolm Cohen Winfield Cooper Charles A. Countryman Glenn S. Daily Sharron Davis Istvan Deak Peter Dill Dodie Dohoney Judy Eisler Peter Embiricos Mira N. Erickson Susanna Fodor Max Frankel Peter F. Frey and Caroline R. Frey Shapiro Susan Friedes Steven Gartner Elaine and Len Gelstein Penny Gibson Jerold and Alice Gingold Sid Glaser Jesse Glassberg Heath Golden Nancy Goldstein Judith Gottfried Theodore and Roslyn Gottlieb

Judy Greenfield Allison Greer Alice Gross Alberta Grossman Sharon Gurwitz Andrew Hamilton Paul and Judith Hancock Zoltan and Beatrice Philippe Hankovszky Linda Hasan Jessica Hildreth Richard Hill Richard and Sureita Hockley John Hunt Filomina Ielpi Janice Jacobs Randall Johnson Gillian Kalson Beth Kent Ronald Klagsburn Michael S. Kundin Joe Lamb Rochelle Lapidus Vivian Lee Nancy Lin Roger Lothrop Patricia Loughman Douglas Magee Elizabeth Mapes Beth Marchetto Philip Marcus Marco Mazzoni Helen Mecs Kerry Medina Katherine Mele Roger Nakagawa

Terry Neugesser John Nikol Tomio Okuma Luise M. Palace Sun Hee Park Laurence Perlman Terry Phelan R. L. Pototzky John D. Quinn Marjorie Raskin Benjamin Robinson Vera Rozenberg Helene Russo Jane van Schaardenburg Milton Schefen Elizabeth Scott Martin Segal Gerard Silverman Edward Spaeth Gabriella and Harvey Sperry Dorothy Spiegel Eunice Stack Marilyn Stetar Joan Summers Lader Yuriy M. Super S. Bleecker Totten Shinya Uetake Dr. and Mrs. Fredrick A. Valauri Jack Van Hulst Gabor and Ann Fagan Vermes Peter Versage Jerry and Alice Bowie Wartell Jay and Susan Weintraub Anne Wigglesworth Klaus and Aracy Winter Karina Yamada

Corporations

Anonymous Bloomberg

Brother International Charles Schwab

Credit Suisse Estee Lauder, Inc.

Ferring Pharmaceuticals, Inc. Goldman Sachs

JPMorgan Chase Zeta Pharmaceuticals

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