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Impact on Family Systems
Bob Campbell, Psy.D., M.Div.MKSN Conference
April 20, 2013
Family Differences
“Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”
- Tolstoy
Interconnections
Interconnections
Interconnections
Trauma
Triangles
Triangles
Triangles
Homeostasis
• Every system works to maintain itself• Change increases stress
Triangles
The Effect of Childhood Trauma
• Stress and stress response• Every situation is different• Diathesis/stress model
• Connections may be broken• Sense of being understood is lost• Feeling intensely vulnerable
Self-Protection
System Out of Whack
Guilt
• “I did something wrong”
Shame
• Guilt says “I did something wrong.”• Shame says “I am something wrong.”• Embarrassment• Silence• Stuckness
Blame
• Blaming the perpetrator• Blaming the church• Blaming the structure• Blaming God• Blaming the family• Essence of blame – a struggle
to understand and interpret
This is even more complex …
Rigidity
Rigidity
• Secrecy, decorum, rules, and shame• Related to faith stance• Black and white thinking• Oughts, shoulds, and can’ts
Boundaries
• Open and closed systems• Family rules
Depression
Isolation
Anxiety
Post-traumatic Stress Disorder
• Flashbacks• Re-experiencing• Avoidance• Distress• Hypervigilance• Irritability• Comorbid mood disorders
Even more complexity
Brokenness from Outside
External Trauma
Brokenness from Inside
• Most important relationships• Trusted • Empowered• Authorities• Connected with Faith
• Loss of connection, attachment • Abandonment• Betrayal• Development of shame from lack of attachment
Internal Brokenness
Internal Brokenness
Ripple Effects
Repetitive Traumatization
• Learned hopelessness• Impact on developmental schema• Loss of meaning• Withdrawal from social support
TRAUMA
Healing the Family System
Seeking Assistance
Keeping Healthy Boundaries
Opening Lines of Communication
The F-word
• Alternatives• Letting go• Softening• Learning assertiveness• Learning self-care• Defusing• Working toward, rather than against• Finding purpose
Increasing Flexibility
Resilience
Dr. Bob [email protected]
