LISTENINGTO UNDERSTAND

PWG ASSOCIATE ADVISOR PROGRAM

23 NOVEMBER 2017

THE GOAL OF ALL COMMUNICATION

IS

UNDERSTANDING

LISTENING IS LIKE

COOKING

Q: WHY IS

EFFECTIVE LISTENING

A GOOD THING?

WHAT IS SAID AND WHAT IS NOT

VERBAL AND NON VERBAL MESSAGES

PERCEIVE AND UNDERSTAND

“I’M FINE”

THERE ARE A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT

LISTENING POSITIONS

ACTIVE LISTENINGListen with all your senses

Be ‘seen’ to be listening

Verbal and non-verbal responses

Allow the person to feel HEARD

Patience / silence

Non verbal Verbal

SmileEye contact

PostureMatchingFocusedNodding

Positive reinforcementRememberingQuestioningReflection

ClarificationSummarising

SIGNS OF ACTIVE LISTENING

PASSIVE LISTENING

CHALLENGE #1: ACTIVE LISTENING

Get a partner

One person share an event from your life

The other actively listens – show verbal and non-verbal signs

1.

2.

3.

CHALLENGE #2: PASSIVE LISTENING

Get a partner

One person share an event from your life

The other passively listens and observes what’s going on

1.

2.

3.

THERE ARE DIFFERENT TYPES OF LISTENING

INFORMATIONAL LISTENING

Focus on messageReceive new facts / infoTake notesVocab, concentration, memory

LISTEN TO LEARN

CRITICAL LISTENING

Fundamental to true learningCompares what we know / believeProblem solving or decision making

Keep open mindIn our day to day life

LISTEN TO EVALUATE OR SCRUTINISE

EMPATHETIC LISTENING

Put self in their shoesAcknowledgement

No judgement or adviceUse ears, eyes and heart

Embrace silence

LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND FEELING AND EMOTION

THE BIGGEST CRIMES

AGAINST LISTENING…

PREPARING YOUR REPLY

JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS

FILLING THE VOID

RASA

SHORTCUT:Process that’s applicable in

any relationship

Receive ASA

Pay attention Eye contact

Lean inLook interested

RAppreciateSA

Make noises and give verbal clues“mmm, ok, ahh”

RA SummariseA

The word ‘so’ is important here. “So, I hear that…”

RASAsk

Ask questions afterwards. “What happened next, what does that mean?”

RAPPORT

A COMMON EXPERIENCE

TAKE IT FROM A ‘THING’ THAT HAPPENS BY CHANCE

INTO A PROCESS

THAT CAN BE REPLICATED

BREAK THE ICE

HAVE DEEP CONVERSATION

STARTERS

HOW OR WHY PEOPLE

STARTSOMETHING IS

POWERFUL

COMMUNICATION COMES FROM 3 PLACES

WORDSTONALITY

PHYSIOLOGY

WORDS 7%TONALITY 38%

PHYSIOLOGY 55%

MATCHING&

MIRRORING

PHYSIOLOGYHOW WE POSITION AND MOVE OUR

BODY DURING COMMUNICATION

TONALITY

Tone (pitch)Tempo (speed)

Timbre (quality)Volume (loudness)

THE WAY THAT WE USED OUR VOICE AND THE TONE OF VOICE

WORDS

Types of words Key words Content chunks

THE ACTUAL WORDS WE USE

Ur dumped

CHALLENGE: SELF REFLECTION

1. Think of a past conversation that didn’tgo your way

2. Imagine how the conversation couldhave gone with more effective listening

3. Capture what you could have donedifferently if you had your time again

THE GOAL OF ALL COMMUNICATION IS

UNDERSTANDING

EFFECTIVE LISTENING HELPS UNLOCK IT

RAPPORT MAKES IT EASIER

WHAT NEXT?