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IwinceattheintensityoftheEarthEmissary’sbeauty,andtakeastepbackward.Despitemydecadesofexposuretohispeople,themeresightofthisuniformedyoungman,thisstranger,stillcausespowerfulfeelingstobubbletothesurfacereflexively.Ashestridesintotheroom,hisemerald-greeneyesglitter.TheresemblancetoPhinnyisuncanny.Henodsagreetingandsitsdownattheconferenceroomtable.Hispink,smooth-skinnedbrilliancemakesmesquint,andIhavetoturnmybacktohimtocombatthegiddiness.Facingthethick-platedwindow,Iobservethedull,greymoonscape,thedeaddustdunesstretchingoffintothehorizon,softlylitbytheindigoglowofLangalanaoverhead. Istruggleagainsttheurgetostareathishazyreflectionintheglass.

“AnEmissary,eh?”Isay,leaningheavilyonmyred-furredcane.“Yourfatherwouldbeproud.”Peekingovermyshoulder,Ipointtothewickerbowlontheglasstable,myfingertremblingeversoslightly.“Please,helpyourselftosomechapra.Butchewtheleafslowly.Itsnectarisvery,verysweet.Yourfatherusedtoloveitwhenhewasaboy,youknow.”

Islowlyrubthescalesonmychinandgesturetowardthemassive,reddishplanetthatfillshalftheblacksky.“Magnificent,eh?”Mauvecloudsencircleitsequatoranddarkpurplishseasstandoutstarklybetweenthreelargelandmasses.

“Tothink,ourpeoplestraveledsofar,enduredsomuch.Butintheend,Langalanaspurnedus,”Isay.“Andso,we’vebeenlefttopinefromafar,todreamaboutwhatcouldhavebeen.”Iturnaroundanddaretolookdirectlyathimagain.

Theyoungmansucksgingerlyonthetipofthered-leafedchapra.Likehisfather,amajesticswathofthick,yellowfiberssheatheshisclosedcraniumandfallstohisshoulders.Aprofoundlovecausesmetoacheandshudder;Ishakemyheadandavertmygazeagain.

“Iknowwhyyou’rehere,”Isay.

FrommysleepingquartersIspiedthesilverlandbuzzer--aglintingpinprickinthedistance--speedingtowardus.Asifridingchoppywaves,itskimmedatoptheundulating,scarlet-furredgrasslandsthatstretchedineverydirection.Thebuzzerclattereduptothereed

LONGING FOR LANGALANABy Mercurio D. Rivera

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fencethatsurroundedourhearthandtwohumans--anolderfemaleandayoungboynotmuchtallerthanme--clamberedoutofitssidecars. Ifroze,open-mouthed,forIhadneverseenanactualalienbefore.Intheweekssincelandfall--whenourWergenbrethrenleftusandcontinuedonwardtotheNorthernContinent--thesewerethefirstpilgrimswehadencountered.I’dbeentoldthattheycameinmagnificentshadesofpinkandbrownandyellow,liketheVisiandemigodsofourmythology,buttoactuallyseethemwithmyowneyes...Ratherthanasinglebreathingcanal,theyboretwotinyholesinthecenteroftheirfacesbeneathaprotrudingskin-coveredbone.Tossed,coloredfiberscoveredthetopsoftheirroundedheads.Butmoststrikingofall,arainbow-coloredaurathatIcanonlydescribeasacoatingofpure,unadulteratedbeautyshimmeredaboutthem.Ibentdownandpeepedatthemoverthewindowsillastheyapproachedourfrontyard.TheoldfemaleconversedcasuallywithFatherandElkah,bothofwhomworkedthefieldswiththebots.AlthoughIlongedtoseethealiensupclose,Ifeltparalyzedbyasuddenoverwhelmingshyness. “Shimera!”Fathercalledout.Hisvoice,thoughloud,soundedshaky. Ihesitatedforjustaninstantbeforeboltingthroughthecentralfireroomtothehearth’sfrontarchway.FatherandElkahstoodsidebyside,bothclutchingtheirbunched-uptether--forwhentheystoodsoclosetogethertherewasachancethatoneofthemmightstumbleoveritorbecomeentangled. “Shimera,theseareournewneighbors,Dr.ZooeyCrestandhernephew,Phineas.”Ashespoketome,Fatherkepthiseyesfixedonthehumans.

WhenItriedtoreturnthealiens’greeting,Ifoundmyselfbreathless.Icouldonlynod. “Iwashoping,younglady,”Dr.Crestsaid,“thatyoumightbeabletotutormynephewintheWergentongue.”Shesaidthisinperfect,unaccentedWergenese.“I’minundatedwithlabwork,andPhinnycouldreallybenefitfromsomepersonalinstruction.Heknowsjustafewwordsandphrases.”AsDr.Crestspoke,theboy,Phinny,stoodbehindher,gawkingatthetetherthatconnectedFatherandElkah’scraniums. “Sayhellotoourneighbors,Phinny,”Dr.Crestinstructedtheboy,switchingtoEarthen.“InWergenese.” Theboystayedhiddenbehindhisaunt’spleated,whiteskirtandshoutedoutabadlyaccented“hello.”Whiletheadultscontinuedspeaking,heshiftedhisgazetomeandstuckouthisdarkpinktongue.Ismiled,marvelingatthisstrangeandwonderfulhumangreeting. “Shimerawouldbehonoredtotutortheboy,”Elkahsaid. WhenPhinnylookedatmeagain,Ibashfullystuckoutmyowncolorlesstongue,whichcouldn’textendnearlyasfarasthehuman’s. TheboylaugheddelightedlyandDr.Crestglancedatme,raisinganeyebrow.“Yes,well…Phinnywillcomebyaroundmiddaytomorrow.” “Youreallymustvisitfordinner,”Fathersaid.

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“Yes,please,weinsist,”Elkahadded. Dr.Crestshotusastrangelook,oneIhaddifficultyreading,andshookherheadslowly.“That’sverykindofyou,butI’mafraidwe’regoingtohavetopass.Someurgentgengineeringexperimentsrequiremyattention.” “Canwecomebyandhelpclearyourfields?”Fatherasked. “Perhapsassistyouwithyourlabwork?”Elkahsaid.“Really,theremustbesomewaywecanhelp.” SeverallinesappearedacrossDr.Crest’sforehead.“That’squiteallright.TheWergenbotsaremanagingthefieldworkjustfine,thankyou.AndIworkbestalone.” “Areyousure—?” HerglarecutFatheroffinmid-sentence.“Goodday.”Shegrabbedtheboy’shand,turned,andmarchedoff. FatherandElkahbowedtheirheads,embarrassedthatthey’dbeentooforward. AndasthelandbuzzerrecededintothedistancePhinnylookedoverhisshoulder,andIthoughtIsawhislong,pinktonguestickoutonceagain,greetingmeinhisspecialway. “Wewereplanetarypioneers,the‘heroictrailblazers’ofLangalana,”Isay,myvoicetingedwithbitterness.“MyfatherandElkahperformedthetraditionalWergenfunction:maintenanceofthefieldbotsusedbythepilgrimstoclearlargepatchesofthegrasslandsinpreparationforthesettlement’sexpansion.AndDr.Creststudiedsoilsamplesand,monthslater,headedupateamofhumangengineersresponsibleforcropproduction.ThiswasyearsbeforetheconstructionoftheScienceInstitute,Emissary,yearsbeforethedevastationhadbegun,beforethelandfallofhundredsofhumanexobiologists,anthropologists,entomologists.” Ipaceslowly,shiftingmyweighttomycane,andrubthescalesonmychin. Theyoungmanstaresatmesilently,impassively.

“ButwhatdidPhinnyandIcareaboutthelogisticsofsettlement?Wewerejustchildren,childrenexploringavastnewplayground.”Ican’thelpit;myvoicebecomeswistfulnow.“EverymorningPhinnycametomyhearthforhislessoninWergenese.Ourconversationsinthosefirstfewdays--inEarthen,ofcourse--wereformalandverybrieffor,yousee,Iwasstillpainfullyshyaroundhim. “Andasthedayspassedwebecamemorecomfortableinoursurroundings,morecomfortablearoundeachother.Oh,theafternoonsPhinnyandIspentinthosebreathtakinggrasslands!Howmanygamesweplayed!Howmanysecretsweshared!Oneday,hetoldmehe’ddiscoveredanaturaltrailthroughthegrasslands,atrailthattwistedouttowardsthePurpleSea.” Elkahoversawtheskitteringbotsthatclearedthegrowinggrassinfrontofourhearth

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whileFatherpreparedthemealsinside.Atthattime,theircranialcordextendedforalmostafulltenmetersandstillsportedthegreatelasticitysotypicaloftherecently-tethered. WhenwestrolledpastElkah,herheadjerkedupwardandherwhiteeyeszoomedinonPhinny.“Whereareyougoing,Phineas?”sheasked. “Totheoverlook,”herepliedinslightlyaccentedWergenese.“Formylesson.” “Verywellspoken,”Elkahgushed.Shepattedhisheadandherfingerslingeredinhisyellowtresses.“You’reanexcellentstudent.”AtthatveryinstantFathermusthavemovedtowardtherearofthehearthbecauseElkah’stetherpulledslightly,causinghertotaketwostepsbackwards.“Olbodo!”sheshoutedoverhershoulder.“Whatiswrongwithyou?” Phinnygrabbedmyhand--whichpulsedwithpleasureathistouch--andpulledmealongtotherecentlydiscoveredpaththatsnakedinasouthwesterlydirection.Becausethebluesunhovereddirectlyoverus,wecastnoshadowsaswewanderedthroughthetrail.ThegrasslandsresemblednothingonWerg--orEarthapparently,judgingfromPhinny’swide-eyedreactioneverytimewemovedthroughthem.Adeepcrimsonfurlinedeachbladeofgrass,andthefieldsliterallyswayed--notfromthewarmwind,butoftheirownvolition--left,thenright,inperfectrhythm.

Fromthetwistingdirtpath,thefieldsfellawayandweemergedontoajutting,rockyoverlook.Shieldingoureyes,westoodatthelipandmarveledattheglorious,placidPurpleSea,kilometersbelow,lappingagainstthecrystallinecliffside.Asteadybreezeblew,warmandsilkyandimpossiblysalty. WesetdownourblanketsandIbeganPhinny’slesson,instructinghimonthenasaltwangsthatpunctuateWergeneseverbs.IfoundthatPhinnyhadanimpressivefacilityforlanguages,somuchsothathisskillsapproachedWergenlevels.Healwayspickedupthenuancesquickly,bitinghislipandconcentratingintensely.Beforelong,however,adamseemedtoburstinhishead--he’dhurlstonesintothesea,orrecitetheWergenesealphabetwhilestandingonhishead,orbreakoffareedandchallengemetoaduel,orlayonhisstomachandspewadewysubstancefromhismouthovertheedgeoftheoverlook--signalingtheendofthelesson. AswebeganourlonghikebackIcouldsensehehadsomethingonhismindhewantedtoaskme.Hisreluctancetodososurprisedme,forPhinnyhadquestionsandopinionsabouteverythingandintheweeksthatI’dbeentutoringhimneveroncehesitatedtovoicethem:

“Doyouhaveanybrothersorsisters?”hehadasked. “Ihadtwosisterswhodiedatbirth,”Ireplied.

“Whydofieldbotslooklikegiantspiders?TheWergensshouldmakethemlook,Idon’tknow...friendlier,”hesaid. “ThebotsaremodeledafterScythians--ourpetsonWerg.” Hisbarragehadcontinued:“IwishIhadthosewhiteWergenscales.Youshouldn’tsayyou’re‘colorless’--you’rewhite,likechalk;”“Themathandscienceholoprogramsareboring,don’tyouthink?”“I’mgladAuntZooeygotassignedtoArgentaratherthan

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Inlandia;”“We’retheluckiestkidsever,tobethefirstpilgrimsonthiscontinent;”“TheysayyoucanfitahundredEarthsintoLangalana,butIdon’tbelieveit!”Andsoon.

IalwaysansweredinWergeneseandwespenthoursonthatoverlook,theafternoonsvanishingintothesun’sblueblazeaswechattedandplayed.

Aswasourpractice,Iwalkedhimbacktohishabitation.SometimesIwouldwanderinsidetocatchaglimpseofDr.Crestinherspaciouslaboratory,therectangulargene-splicerslyingonlongtablesandhumminginthebackground.Buttodayshestoodattheentrancewayinherwhitelabcoatandwavedforustoenterwhenshesawusapproach. PhinnyandIenteredthelabwhereDr.Creststoodinfrontofatablewithamicroscope,abluesyringeandodd-shapedmetallicdevicesthatscurriedaboutthetableontheirown.“Didyouhaveagoodlesson,Phineas?” “Yes,AuntZooey,”PhinnysaidinWergenese.“Learnedalot.” “Thewatermelonisready,ifyou’dliketotrysome.” Phinnyjumpedupanddownandletoutawhoop.Dr.CresthadbeentryingforsometimetogengineerEarthenfruitsandvegetablestogrowinthegardenbehindtheirhabitation.

“Canwehavesomerightnow?”Phinnysaid.Shehesitated.“Comehere,Shimera.”Despiteherwrinkleddermis,sheradiatedwavesofbeauty--likeallhumans--that

mademefeeltinglyandhappytobealive.Shegentlygrabbedmyhand--anelectricticklebuzzedthroughme--andplaceditonthetable,palmup.Herfivefingers,sopinkanddaintyanddexterous,brushedmythreedigitswithasandpaperysubstance.“Letmedoaquickrunofyourcellsamplestomakesureit’ssafeforyoutoeatthesefruits,”shesaid.“Phinny,whydon’tyourunoutsideandcutupamelon.”

Phinnyscrambledoutthedoor. “Shimera,I’vereceivedElkahandOlbodoh’sdailydinnerinvitations,theirnotesande-messages.”Dr.Crestremovedabundleofredslipsofpaperfromherlabcoatjacketanddangledtheminfrontofme.“Tellthemtostopit.”Shecrumpledtheinvitationsinherfive-fingered,white-knuckledfistandtossedthemintothewastebin.“YouWergenscanbesogoddamnedoverbearing.” ThescannerbeepedandDr.Creststaredintoamonitorandmadeapeculiargesture,raisingheropposabledigitintheair.“Allclear.Enjoythewatermelon.”

IfacetheEmissary,butmakeaconsciouseffortnottolookhimintheeye.Hehasfinishedthechapraandfingerstheedgesoftheemptywickerbowl.

“FromthatbriefexchangewithDr.Crest,Ilearnedataveryearlyagehowimportantitwastosuppressourfeelingsaroundhumans,howouremotionsmakethemuncomfortable,andcanpotentiallydrivethemaway.IpromisedmyselfatthatmomentthatIwouldnevermakePhinnyfeelawkwardaroundme.Iwouldbottleupmyfeelingsforhimdeepinside

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meratherthaneverrisklosinghim,”Isay,myvoicetrembling. “KeepingthatpromiseprovedmoredifficultthanIcouldeverimagine.Yourfather’skindnesses,hisgenerosity,hishumor,alltouchedmedeeply.Itriedmybesttocontainmyselfaroundhim,mindyou,justnotalwayswithsuccess.” Ilimpovertothewindowandpressbothmyhandsagainstit.

FollowingPhinny’slessons,heandIwouldsitinDr.Crest’sgardeninwhathecalledthe“watermelonpatch.”He’dsplitthemelonswithalongbladeandwe’dliftedoutthepinkcenterseatingthemheartily,juicedribblingdownourchins.Wealsooccasionallysampledthesucculentchaprathatgrewonthereedsofgrass,amuchsweeterfoodthanthemelons.AsI’vesaid,IpreferredthetasteandtextureofthewatermelonswhilePhinnylovedthechapra. Oneday,intoxicatedwithsugarychapra,PhinnyfinallyblurtedoutthequestionsthatIsensedhadbeenweighingonhismind. “Shim,whydoWergenslovehumans?” HisdirectnessfrazzledmeandIfounditdifficulttorespond. “Whatmakesussospecial?”heasked.

“Well...Imean,you’reallso...beautiful.”Iblushed. “Youthinkso?AuntZooeythinksthatitmightbebiological.Maybethewaywesmellorsomething.” Ididn’tknowwhattosay. “Yourfather?AndElkah?Whyarethey,youknow,tiedtogetherthatway?”heasked.AndfromthelookinhiseyesIcouldsensethatthissubject,thetetheringofFatherandElkah,waswhatinterestedhimmostofall.ButIwaspainfullyshyaboutthesubject.

“They’retethered,”Isaid,embarrassed.Afterafewseconds,whenherealizedIwouldvolunteernomoreinformation,heasked,“Areyourscalessoft?” Ishrugged. Phinnyshylyreachedouttome.“IsitokayifI...?” Inodded,andhegentlybrushedhishandalongmycheekbone. Iknowit’ssilly,but,sometimes,allofthesedecadeslater,Icanstillfeelthewarmthofhisfingerstracingthecrevicesbetweenmyscales.

“Theyfeel...rubbery,nice,”hesaid.“OnEarthonlyreptileshavescales.”Hisgazeshiftedtothecoronatis,theleafyheaddressthatcoveredmycranium.“Andwhataboutyourhead...”

“That’spersonal,”Isaidquickly,andhewithdrewhishandsheepishly. “WhydoWergenswearthosethings?Thoseleaf-hats?” “Tocoverour...areas.”Ilookedawayfromhimagain.“That’swhereourcordsemerge.Whenit’stime.”

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Hedigestedthisinformation.“Shim,doyouthinkaWergencouldevertetherwithahuman?” Myheartsskipped.Ishrugged. “Doallofyougettethered?”heasked. “Afterthetestsaredone,yes,forthemostpart.” “Tests?” “Ourmedicsalwaystestourgenestomakesurewe’re...compatible.Somepersonshavediseasesthatdon’tletthemtether.Andsomepeoplejustchoosenotto,”Isaid,lookingdownward.“That’snotagoodthing.” “Oh.”Andjustlikethat,Phinnyjumpedtohisfeetandsprintedinthedirectionofmyhearth.“Raceyou!” Ileapttomyfeetandchasedafterhim,laughing.“Wait!Wait!”

PerhapsitwasbecauseIstoodslightlytallerthanPhinny,orbecauseheconstantlytookinstructionfrommeonWergenese,butheresentedwheneverItoldhimwhattodooutsideofourlessons.Lookingback,IsupposeIdidsometimestakeasuperiortonewithhim,butyouhavetounderstand,thissprungfrommydesiretoprotecthimfromthedangersthatexistedalongsideLangalana’snaturalwonders. Allofthatchangedononecoolday,adayjustlikeanyotherwithmagentacloudsloomingoverheadinthepink-tintedskyandthesmellofsnowintheair,thedaythatDr.CrestsentPhinnytomyhearthtoobtainanextensionblade--oneofthefieldbotshaddamagedaclawandsheneededtoreplaceit--andIdecidedtoaccompanyhimonhiswalkbackhome.Thetruthis,InotonlywantedtobewithPhinny,Ialsowantedtoexperiencesoaringoverthegrasslandsinhislandbuzzer,whichhisaunthadlethimborrow. Asweacceleratedaway,ElkahandFatherwavedgoodbyetoPhinnyfromawindow.“Goodbye,Father!”Ishouted,smilingbroadly,onehandonthehandgripandtheotherholdingmyheaddressinplace.“Goodbye,Elkah!” “Whydon’tyoucallElkah‘mother’?”Phinnyasked. “Elkahisn’tmymother,silly,”Isaid,titteringattheabsurdityofhiscomment.“ElkahisFather’ssecondmate.” “Soyourparentsaredivorced?” “Divorced?” “Yeah,divorced.Likemine.Theyseparatedwhentheyrealizedthattheycouldn’tgetalonganymore.”

“Separatedmates?”Ishuddered.Ihadneverheardanythingmorehorrible,more...alien.

“MomdecidedthatitwouldbebestformetostaywithDad,”hesaid.“She’sareallyimportantpersonontheOuterCouncilanddoesn’thavetimeforkids.ButthenDadenrolledintheDeltaExpedition.SoheleftmewithAuntZooey.”Phinnyhadasad,

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farawaylookinhiseyeIhadneverseenbefore. Ididn’tknowwhattosay,soIsimplystaredahead. Wesaidnothingforawhile.Thebuzzerskimmedtheapexoftheredblades,andwebothheldontothehandlegripsaswesurfedthewavesofgrass.

“So.Whereisyourmom?”hesaid.“OntheNorthernContinent?”“Hah!She’shere,justencorporated,Phinny!”“Whatdoyoumean?”

“Don’tyouknowwhatencorporationis,silly?” Phinnystraightenedup.“Well,I’veheardofit...” “Oh,look!Amanticola!”Ishrieked.“Stopforasecond.” Ijumpedoffthesidecarandpushedmywaythroughthetall,featherygrasstothebrightyellow-and-whitepetalsofthebuddingmanticolastem.WhenIstoopeddowntotakeinitsscent,IheardPhinnyscream. Heshovedmehardfrombehind,sendingmesprawlingtotheground. AsItumbled,Isawit,thereonapatchofgrasslesssand,emergingfromashadowyburrow.Withaclickingsound,thethingtwitchedandunfoldeditscarapacesegmentbysegmentuntilitstoodateyelevelwithPhinny.Itwasasthickasmyleg,withalightning-boltshapedtorso.Thornscovereditsmuscularchitinoussections,anditborethesamedeep-redcolorasthesurroundinggrasslands.AsItriedtofigureoutwhetheritwasplantorinsect,thecreaturescreeched.ItseemedpoisedtosinkitssharpteethintoPhinnywhenhepulledtheextension-bladefromhispocketandlunged.Hedroveitrightbetweenthething’sfourblack,bulbouseyes,poundingthecreatureagainandagain,evenafterithadslumpedtotheground. IwatchedfromgroundlevelasPhinnyflattenedthecreature’sheadwithhisblowsuntilitlayinaredpoolofviscousfluid.Onlythendidhestop. Iwalkedbehindhimandplacedmyhandonhisback.“Diditbiteyou?”Iasked.Inresponse,Phinnymadeabizarrechokingsoundanddisgorgedchunksofsemi-digestedfoodontotheground. “Areyouill?”

Hewipedhismouth.“Whydidyourunintothegrassblades?”heshouted.“There’snopathhere!Youknowit’sdangerous.”Hestompedofftowardthelandbuzzer. Iranafterhim.“Ican’twaittotelleveryone,Phinny.Yousavedme.Whatwasthatthing?Weren’tyouevenalittleafraid?Thewayyoustruckitdown,why,I’veneverseensuchcourage!”

Heignoredme. ButaswerodebackandIchatteredonandonabouthisbraveryPhinny’smoodseemedtobrighten.Hestoodstraighter,withhischestpuffed. Followingtheincident,wewerebothsoexcitedandflusteredwegotturnedaroundwithoutevenrealizingitandwoundupbackatmyhearth.Asweapproached,IsawElkahtendingthefieldsandIleaptoffthelandbuzzerasitslowed--thistimecarefullystayingon

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thesandywalkingpath--andshoutedoutwhathadhappenedasIrantowardher. “Thatsoundslikeagrubber!There’veonlybeenafewofthemspottedontheNorthernContinent--uncommon,butdangerouscreatures--butIdidn’tknowwehadthemhere.How’dyouknowitsweakspot,boy?Rightbetweentheeyes!Icertainlywouldn’twanttobefightingoffoneofthosethingswithnothingbutablade.”ShepattedPhinnyonthebackandshoulders.“Shimera,youhavetobemorecareful.Theboycouldhavebeenhurt.” Fromthatday,thedynamicchangedbetweenus.It’shardtoexplain,butInolongerfeltthesameneedtoprotectPhinny.Iknewthathecouldtakecareofhimself.Notonlythat,Iknewthathecouldprotectmetoo.

Islowlycirclethetable.TheyoungEmissarylooksatmecuriously,asifstaringatanexperimentgoneawry. “Despitethelargenumberofincominghumanpilgrimsovertheyears,Argenta’spopulationgrewonlyslightly.MostarrivalssettledinInlandiaorinprovincesintheNorthernandWesternContinents. “Asformypeople,youhavetounderstand,Emissary,theJointVentureAgreementprovidesthatonlyfivepercentofthepopulationcanbeWergen.GivenLangalana’ssheersize,wewerespreadthin,toputitmildly.NoWergenslivedinInlandia.Ourarrivingpilgrimslivedsolelyonthelargecontinentinthenorth--aninconceivabledistancefromArgenta.Asaresult,Iwentalmostadecadewithoutseeinganotherofmykind--exceptforFatherandElkah,ofcourse.Adecade!Nevertheless,surroundedbybeautifulhumans--mostimportantly,inthecompanyofPhinny--IconsiderthesedaysonLangalana,thesehalcyondaysofmychildhood,thehappiestmomentsofmylife.” TheEarthEmissaryopenshismouthasiftosaysomething.

IsawPhinnylessfrequentlywhenhebegantospendmuchofhistimeassistingotherpilgrimswiththeconstructionofthefarmhousesandplantations.MostoftenIwouldvisithimattheworksitewherehehelpedAuntZooey’steamwiththeirrigationsystem.WewouldeattogetheratmiddayanddiscussthelatestdevelopmentsonLangalana. Hestoppedbymyhearthonemorningtosharethenewsthatanotherstarshipjammedwithovertenthousandhumanswasexpectedtoarriveearlynextyear.TheplanstoexpandInlandiatoaccommodatethemneededtobeexpedited. “I’mgoingtobeworkingtwelve-hourdays,Shim:programmingthebotstoprocessgrasslandreeds,workingwiththeengineerstodiagramthecitylayout.” “Phineas!”Fathershouted,lumberingcloselyaheadofElkah.Withthecordfullyextended,theycouldnowwalkonlyseveralfeetapart.“My,butyou’vesprouted.Whatbroadshoulders!You’vebeenworkingthecropfields,eh?”

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And,indeed,Phinny’stransformationhadbeendramatic.He’dgrownmuchtallerandhisyellowfibersseemedpaledbythesuntoanalmostgoldenwhite.Hisskinhadbrownedandhisbodyhadbecomeleanandtaut. AfterIguidedhimaway--hisbeautymesmerizedElkahandFatherandpromptedthemtoearwighimfarbeyondthepointofrudeness--heturnedtomeandwhisperedconfidentially.“Inevernoticedbefore,buttheirtether...Itseemstohaveshrunk.” Iblushed.Ofcoursetheirtetherhadconstricted.FatherandElkahhadbeenmatedforquitesometimenow.“I-I...” “It’sokay,Shim.Iknowyoudon’tfeelcomfortabletalkingaboutit.”Heturnedtome.“It’sgoingtohappen.I’mmovingtoInlandia.” “Really?” “AuntZooey’sgettingolder.Sheneedstocontinueherresearchinalesschallengingenvironment.Withthegrubberswarmsandtheconstantevacuations,it’sgettingtobetoomuchforher.” Iheardthewords,buthadtroubleregisteringtheirmeaning.“Ithinkit’sadmirablethatyou’resoloyaltoDr.Crest.” “It’stheleastIcandoaftereverythingshe’sdoneforme.” Myspiritsankastherealitysetin.Althoughhe’dbeentalkingaboutthisforsometime,Ineverthoughtthatthedaywouldactuallycome.“When?” “Nextweek.Thebotsneedmajorreprogrammingtoassistwiththeconstructionofthehighwaysandofficebuildingsandsewagesystems.AndweneedtoclearseveralmoremilesofInlandia’sgrasslands.” Aswewalkedourfamiliarpathtotheoverlook,thefield’scolorseemedtoshiftfromredtopurple. “Whataboutyou,Shim?There’splentyofopportunityinInlandia,youknow.Thegrubberinfestationherehasonlygottenworse.Andwithyourlanguageskills—” “Ican’tleavemyhearth,Phinny.Notyet.NotuntilmyPassage.” “Your‘Passage’?”Heraisedaneyebrow.“Isn’tittimeyoufinallytoldmewhatthisisallabout?”

Ihesitated,forourritualsaresacred,personal.Butthenagain,thiswasPhinny.“WhenaWergenreachestheageofmaturity,there’saPassageceremony,”Iexplained.“Amalestandswiththefemalethroughtherites.Butinmycase...thenearestWergenisontheothersideoftheplanet.WhatamItodo,Phinny,swimacrosstheocean?”

“Well,it’sjustamatteroftimebeforewehavethepartsforthebotstoconstructspaceplanes--”

“Itdoesn’tmatter.Icouldn’tperformtheriteswithastranger.”“I’llstandwithyou,”Phinnysaid,justlikethat,hisgreeneyesaglitter.Ifeltlikeflut-flutsflewcirclesinmystomachs.“Youwould?”“Hey,I’ddoanythingforyou,Shim.Youknowthat.”Hereachedoutandcaressed

mycheekwiththebackofhishand,tracingthelinesofmyscales.

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Myheartsweresofullthattheyseemedtoexpandintomythroatandchokeoffmyvoice. Whenwereachedtheoverlook,hebentdowntopickupastone,whichheshuckedsidearmintothecoruscatingwatersbelow.Howmanytimeshadhedonethisovertheyears?Somethingaboutthefamiliarityofthisactmademyheartsswellevenmore.

Andsoonachillyday,withtherisingsunpeekingfrombehindanamethystcloudbank,westoodatopPiner’sPeak,thehighestpointnearestArgenta,andperformedtherites.ForasfarasIcouldsee,thegrasslandsshonelikeavastcoverletofscarlet,shimmeringintheindigosunlight.OnWerg,myclosestfriendswouldhaveattendedthePassageCeremony;here,justPhinny,Dr.Crest,ElkahandFatherstoodbyme.OnWerg,mycompanionwouldhavebeenapotentialtetheringmate;here,mysweetPhinnyaccompaniedme,wearingthecoronatisandivy-lacedceremonialgarbtraditionallywornbyWergenmales.

FatherandElkah-thrilledatPhinny’sparticipation-presidedovertheceremony.Theymovedawkwardly,theirtethernownotmorethansixincheslongandsotautthatElkah’sheadleanedslightlytotheleftandFather’stiltedslightlytotheright.Bythistime,FatherhadattaineddominancesoElkahrarelyspoke.AsFathersangtheOldWords,Iremovedmyheaddress,exposingmycranialcavity,andsangthesongofadulthood. IcaughtPhinnypeekingforasecondbeforeavertinghiseyes. MycheeksflushedandIfeltmycraniummoisten. Fatherraisedhisarmsandsaidthefinalwords.Andthenchaoserupted. Fatherdrewhissidearmandalaserpulsefired.Phinnyyankedonmyarmashestumbled,pullingmeawayfromthesuddenmovementbehindus.WhenIturned,agrubber’scarcasslayontheground,steaming.AnotheronesprungatusandFatherfiredagain.Atthesametime,apurple-thornedgrubberloomedoverDr.Crest,whoheldherhandoverherface.Everythingwashappeninginaheartbeat,andtheshockrenderedDr.Crest--indeed,allofus--silent.Unabletomovequickly,FatherandElkahstumbledovereachotherandfelltotheground,thesidearmdroppingoutofFather’shand.Withoutthinking,IhurledmyselfatthecreaturebeforeitcouldstrikeatDr.Crest.AsIcollidedwithit,thegrubberturned,ablurrystreak,andclampedontomyupperlegwithitsmandibles.WhileIrolledontheground,thecreatureontopofme,ashotrangoutandIfoundmyselfstaringatthegrubber’sheadlesscarapace. “Areyouallright?”Phinnyasked,clutchingFather’ssmokingfirearm.ButIcouldbarelyhearhimoverthescream--myownscream,Icametorealize--asIspottedthethornsembeddedinmythighandtheclearbloodstreamingfrommyshreddedleg.

Iliftmycaneintheairandwaggleit,shiftingallmyweighttomyhealthylegtrunk.“Amemento.” TheEmissaryscratcheshischin.

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“PhinnyandDr.CrestdelayedtheirrelocationtoInlandiaforseveralweeksduringmyslowandpainfulrecoverywhileFatherandElkahprogrammedthemedibotstotendtome.Butthevenomprovedbeyondthebots’abilitytotreat.Infact,Fatherinitiallyfearedthatthebotsmightfinditnecessarytoamputatemyleg,butDr.Crestintervenedandworkedtodevelopwhatwethenthoughtwouldbeanall-purposeanti-venom.Youhavetorealize,Emissary,thiswasbeforeweunderstoodthetruenatureofthegrubbers.” Hestaresblanklyatme.

“Eventuallytheinfectionwanedandmyfeversubsided,”Iexplain.“Althoughmybodyachedduringthisperiod,myspiritsoaredforeverynightyourfathersatwithmeandheldmyhandandreadtome.Intruth,Idreadedmyrecovery,forIknewthatoncemyconditionhadimproved,Phinnywouldbeleavingme.”

IfellintoadeepdepressionafterPhinny’srelocationtoInlandia.Icouldn’tbringmyselftogetoutofbedtoattendthescheduledtutorialsessionsinWergenese--oreventohelpFatherandElkahwiththeclearingofthegrasslands.Phinnymusthavesensedtheimpacthisdeparturehadonme,becausehemadeanefforttocallandvisitregularly.Overtimethough,thebi-weeklyvisitsbecamemonthlytrips,thenjustrandomstop-bysonbusinessoutingsseveraltimesayear.Butwewouldstillspeakjustabouteveryday.Duringourholo-chatshewouldconfideinmeabouthisproblems,abouthisadjustmenttolifeInland:howthegrasslandshadbeenclearedawayandglasstowerserected,howhe’dobtainedapositionasaninternontherecentlyformedSettlementCouncil.Hetoldmeingreatdetailaboutdebateswithhisnewfriendsandco-workers,whichrangedfrompoliticaldiscourseaboutsettlementpolicytopettysquabblesaboutwhogottheofficeswiththebestviews.SomeofthecouncilmenhadstronglysupportedtheGrowthforHumanityBillpendingonEarth,whichpushedformoreprofitableallianceswithotheralienspeciesattheexpenseofcurrentHuman-Wergenjointventures.Phinnytoldmethateventhoughitwasn’thisplacetodoso,he’dpassionatelydefendedtheWergenalliance,invokingloyalty,thedeepfriendshipthathaddevelopedbetweenourspecies,thevastamountofknowledgeandphilosophythathumanitystillhadtolearnfromtheWergens. DuringtheseyearsthatPhinnylivedinInlandia,Ilivedmydayswaitingforhisprojectiontoappearonmyholo-monitor.Ilongedtohearhisgentlevoice,tolaughathisself-deprecatinghumor.Thesechatsbecamemoredifficulttoschedule,however,asthegrubberinfestationsincreased.Itseemedthateveryfewdaystheevacuationsirensblaredandfull-blownlaserfireblastedontheoutskirtsofArgenta. Atthetime,apersonalmatteralsoconcernedme.Mybodyachedtotether,butbeingisolatedfrommyownkindmadethisimpossible.Bythen--althoughIhadnotdiscusseditwithFatherorElkah--Ihadalreadymademydecision.Iwouldnottether.Morethananything,IwantedtocommitmyselftothepersonIcaredformorethananyoneelseintheuniverse.Iwantedtospendmylife--inthewaythathumanssharetheirlives--

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withPhinny. Phinnyknewaboutmydilemma;Ihadconfidedinhimaboutmyneedtotether,butnotaboutthedecisionIhadmade.Duringoneofhisunexpectedvisits,wetookourfamiliarwalktogether.Abioelectricalfield--quiteeffectiveatthetime--keptthetrailandtheoverlookclearofgrubbers.Duringthiswalk,Iconfessedmyintentions. “Idon’tplantotether,”Isaidtohim. “You’rejustsayingthatbecauseofyourcircumstances.I’msurethatiftherewereothersofyourkindamongusyou’dfeeldifferently.” “MaybeI’lljustget‘married,’”Isaidplayfully.“I’vepracticallylivedmylifelikeahumananyway.Afterreadinguponit,Imustsay,Phinny,there’ssomethingquiteintriguingaboutthemarriageritual.” “WhendoIgettoreadthebookonWergenmatingcustoms?”

“Phinny,youknowwewouldn’twriteaboutsuchthings…”ButwhenIsawhiswarmsmileIrealizedhe’djustbeenteasing.

“Iknow,Iknow,”hesaid,holdinghishandsupasifsurrendering.“Shim,Ihavesomethinginmind.”Anditwasatthatmoment--Idon’tknowwhatgaveitaway,really--thatitfinallydawnedonme:Phinnyhadbeenplanningto“propose”tome.Itriedthen--asIhadonsomanyprioroccasions--toimagineourlivestogetheronceweformallycommittedtoeachother.Humanmarriagewassuchapaleshadowoftethering.ButifitwaswithPhinny,withmysweetPhinny,itwouldsuffice.

“WhyPhineasCrest,Ican’timaginewhatitmightbe,”Isaid,mimickinghisteasingtone.ThenIspokeseriously.“Thankyou,Phinny.Thankyouforalwaysbeingthereforme.”Ikissedhimonthecheek. Hehuggedme,andIfeltabuzzsurgethroughmybody. “Phinny!”afamiliarvoiceshouted.FatherandElkahlumberedtowardus.Phinnytookastepbackward,alookofhorroretchedacrosshisface.Inhindsight,IsupposeIshouldhaverealizedthathewouldreactthisway,neverhavingseenthisstageofencorporationbefore.

Fatherploddedonfourlegs,hisandElkah’s.Elkah’sleftarmprotrudedfromFather’smidsection.TheirtwotorsoswerepressedsotightlytogetherthatElkah’sleftsidemeldedintoFather’srightside.AnothersignthatFatherhadestablisheddominancewasthatElkah’sheadhaddisappearedwithinhis,saveforherrightear,whichstillremainedvisible.Inseveralmonths,alltracesofherbodywouldvanish.

“Don’tbeafraid,Phinny,”Fathersaid,skitteringtowardsus,amagnificenttumbleweedofextremities.“It’sstillus.” Phinnystoodsilently,hismouthagape,hiseyesbulging. FatherchatteredawayforalongtimewhilePhinnygawked.Finally,IgrabbedPhinny’sarmandgentlyledhimaway.

“Sothat’sencorporation!”hesaid.“But...Elkah?”“She’llbeencorporatedcompletelywithinFather.Likemymother.Oh,someof

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Elkah’sskillsandrandommemorieswillsurvive.Andwhenencorporationiscomplete,Father--thenewFather--willbeimpregnatedwithabrood.” “That’showyourpeople...?” “Phinny,Ican’tbelieveyoudidn’tknow.You’vebeenseeingthiswithyourowneyesforyears.”Iplacedmyhandonhisshoulder.Heflinched. “I’veneverheardofanythingmorehorrific.Wergenfemalesdiewhentheymate?” “Notnecessarily.Thedominantpartner--maleorfemale--encorporatestheweakeroneandthenpropagates.Father’sgeneticdominancewasdeterminedlongagowhenheandElkahfirsttethered.Inthesameway,mygenotypeissuchthatIwouldsurelybedominantifIevertethered.” “Isee,”hesaid.Wrinkledlinesformedacrosshisforehead.Hefoldedhisarmsacrosshischestandwalkedafewstridesaheadofme.“PoorElkah.” “It’spartofnature,Phinny.Partofwhoweare.Trustme,ElkahlookedforwardtothedaywhenshecouldpassonherbestqualitiestoFather,whenshecouldprovidetherawmaterialsnecessaryforthebirthingofahealthybrood.” Hesaidnothingforalongwhile.DuringthisinterminablesilenceIcursedFather’sunbelievablypoortiming.HisappearancehadupsetPhinnyjustatthemomentwhenhewasaboutto“propose”tome,Iwassureofit. “Phinny,whatwereyougoingtoaskme?”Ifinallysaid,breakingthesilence. Heshookhisheadslowly.“Encorporation.I’msurprisedAuntZooeydidn’ttellmeaboutit,orthatithasn’tappearedinthexenobiologyliterature.” “Youknowit’ssomethingwedon’ttalkabout.It’svery...personaltous.Somuchsothatit’sanexpressconditionoftheJointVentureAgreementthathumansnotwriteaboutitordiscussit.” Hesmilednow,thatwideangelicsmilethatcouldlightupallofLangalana.“Natureismarvelous,wondrous,isn’tit?” Iexhaledloudlyandreturnedhissmile.Phinnywassogentle,sobroad-minded.Ofcourseheunderstood.Ofcourseheacceptedourways. “Tomorrow,”hesaid,“Iwantyoutowaitformeatourspecialplace.” “Oh?”Ifeltweightless.“Whateveritis,can’tyoutellmenow?” “No,no.”Heshookhisheadandsmiledbashfully. “Please,Phinny?” “Don’tmakemeruinit!”

Hesqueezedmyhandsandkissedthem.“Mydearloyal,Shim.IhavesomuchI’vewantedtotellyou.Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow,then,”Isaid.

Iarrivedattheoverlookalmostanhourearly,dressedintheshimmeringgoldenrobesthatPhinnyhadpurchasedformeinInlandia.IbroughtblanketsandsatdowninthesamespotwhereIhadfirstbegunPhinny’slessonsinWergenese.Inmymind’seye,aghostly

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versionofthatrambunctiousboyfromlongagosatontheblanketnexttome,concentratingintenselythenjumpingtohisfeettotossarockintotheocean. Fromthepositionofthesun,IcouldseethatPhinnyhadscheduledthismomenttocoincideperfectlywiththesunset. Wherewouldwelive?PhinnyhadmentionedthespaciousnessofhisInlandianapartment.Butwehadnotspokenaboutchildren.Althoughbiologicalprocreationcouldneverhappen,Phinnyhadoftenmentionedthenumerousorphanedchildrenleftbehindbypilgrimskilledbythegrubberlocusts. Iheardtherustlingbladesofgrassandturnedaround.Phinnystoodthere.Hisfaceglowedwithjoytoseeme;hislongyellowfibersruffledintheoceanbreeze.Irosetomyfeetandhecametome,heldmyoutstretchedhandsinhis.Myentirebodytingled;Ifeltincandescent. “Thisismygifttoyou,Shim,”hesaid,hisvoicehoarsewithemotion. HowmanytimeshadIdreamtofthismoment? AndhowmanytimesinthehundredyearssincehaveIrelivedthatmoment,amomentforeverpreservedinmysynapticamber. Hereleasedmyhandsandswepthisarmbackwardsasifclearingamessytable,asifavoidingacharginggrubber. Ifollowedthedirectionofhishand,whichpointedtothegrasslandsbehindhim,tothesquatsilhouetteofamalefigure.AfigureunmistakablyWergen.Hesteppedtowardus,emergingintothelightofdusk. “Rememberwhenwewerechildren,whenAuntZooeytookyourcellsamples?”Phinnysaid.“ItransmittedyoursamplestotheNorthernContinent.Theyranthenormalgenetictestsandfoundaperfectmatch.Whenthelasthumanstarshiparrived,Iarranged....Well,itdoesn’tmatter.Shim,thisisKorte.Korte,Shim.” Confusionoverwhelmedme.Phinny’swordsinitiallyregisteredasgibberish.Butastheirmeaningsankin,awaveofvertigocausedmetostaggersidewaysandbackwards. TheWergenkneltandbowedhishead.“Aprofoundhonor,LadyShimera.” Iturnedandboltedintothegrasslandsasquicklyasmylegswouldcarryme,dashingthroughthechest-highbladesintodenserbrushthatrosehigherandhigherovermyhead.“Shim!What’swrong?”Phinnycalledoutbehindme. RunningblindlythroughthefieldsIheardPhinny’svoicebecomefainterandfainter.“Shim!Shim!” Ilostallsenseoftimeracingthroughthegrasslands,theblades’gentlefurbrushingagainstmyskin.Hadsecondspassed?Hours?Idroppedtomykneesandheavedsuffocatingsobs.Mybreathingcanalbeggedforoxygenbutmybodyshudderedwitheachspasticsob.Irolledtothegroundandhuggedmyknees.Whathadhappened?Icouldn’tunderstandwhathadhappened.Rockingmyself,Iweptuncontrollably. WhenIfinallyopenedmyeyes,thetwilighthadfadedandthestarshadblinkedon.OccasionallyIheardabuzzerwhizovermyheadandvoicescallingoutmyname.ButI

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onlywantedthegrubberstoappearandendmyagony,toseizemeintheirmandiblesandmercifullyripmetoshreds.

Aknockonthedoorofmyroomwokemeupthenextmorning.Sittingup,Ilookedaroundandfoundmyselfinmyhearth.Adream.Yes,ithadallbeenahorrificdream. Phinnyentered.AndallatonceIknewthatyesterdayhadreallyhappened.Hisdisheveledappearanceandthecreasedsemi-circlesunderhiseyessuggestedthathehadbeenpartofthesearchparty. “Shim.Whathappened?Whydidyourunawaylikethat?”Hesatbesidemeontheedgeofmybed.“Don’tyouknowthatthegrubbersareeverywherenow?It’samiraclewefoundyouinonepiece.” Iglaredathim. “Ithoughtyou’dbehappy.Korteisaperfectgeneticmatch;he’llmakeanexceptionaltetheringmate.” Myeyesbrimmedwithangrytears. “Whatisit?” “Oh,Phinny,youidiot.Don’tyourealizethatI’minlovewithyou?”Isaid,thewordsfinallypouringoutofme.“ThatI’vebeeninlovewithyoufromthefirstdaywemet?Thatyoumeaneverythingtome,thatIcan’timaginealifewithoutyou?”Thetearsstungmyeyes.“Icouldn’tcarelessabouttethering.” Heseemedstunned.“Shim...Iunderstand,”hesaid.“You’reWergen.Ofcourseyouloveme.” “No,youdon’tunderstand.Youdon’tunderstandatall.Thisgoesbeyondthat.Idon’tloveyoubecauseyou’rehuman.Iloveyou...becauseyou’reyou!” Heshookhishead.“Howcanyousaythat?YouknowthateveryWergenfeelsthatwayabouteveryhuman.”Hisfacefilledwithunmistakablepity. “Idon’tfeelthiswayaboutanyotherhuman!” “That’sbecauseyou’vespentmoretimewithmethanyouhavewithanyoneelse.It’sonlynaturalthatyouwouldhaveastrongerattractiontowardme.”

“Yourkindness,yourhumor,yourgenerosity,thosearethethingsthatIlove...notyourbeauty.”

“Shim...”“HowcanIconvinceyou?”Iclutchedhishands.“HowcanImakeyouunderstand

thatwhatIfeelforyou…It’sreal.Iswearit.”“Onarationallevel,youhavetoknowthatthisjustisn’ttrue.You’retoointelligent

nottorealizethatthebiologicalimpulsethatdrivesyourspeciestobeattractedtomine....It’saffectingyou.” “Fine.”Iletgoofhishandsandcrossedmyarms.“Soyou’veknownhowIfeltaboutyoualltheseyears?Itmusthaveprovidedyouwithsuchamusement.” “Shim,Ineedyoutounderstand,”hesaid.Hegentlyranhishandacrossmycheek.

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Islappedhishandaway.“Don’tyoudaretouchme!” “You’relikeadearsistertome...”hesaid,hisvoicecracking. “Leave!”Ijumpedoutofbedandshovedhim. “Shim...”Hehunghisheadandwalkedtowardthedoor. “Don’tyoucarethattheverysightofyoutorturesme?Thatyourtouchisagonytome?You’reamonster!” “Youhavetounderstand...”Heturnedandgrabbedmyshoulders. “Getout!Getout!”Islappedhimhard.Hetookafewstepsback,hishandoverhisredcheek,andIslammedthedoorinhisface.“Leavemealone!Idon’teverwanttoseeyouagain.Doyouhearme?Letmelivemylifeinpeace.”ButevenasIsaidthewords,Ilongedforhimtobreakdownthedoor,totakemeinhisarmsandbegmyforgiveness,tokissmeandholdmetight,andtetherwithmeinthefleeting,short-livedwayofhispeople,wereitpossible.Mybacktothedoor,Islidtothefloorandstifledthesobswithmyhands.Afterseveralinterminableseconds,Iheardhimretreat,hisfootstepslikedaggersinmyhearts.

“Don’tlookatmethatway,Emissary,”Isay.Thelookofpity--evenafteralltheseyears--stillstings.“Itwasn’teasy,butIeventuallygotoveryourfather.” TheEmissarynodshisheadslowly. “Iredirectedmyenergiestowards...moreproductiveendeavors.ItaughtclassesinWergenesetothousandsofarrivinghumans.Andyearslater,Iturnedmyattentiontopolitics.ItraveledtoInlandiaeverymonthandsatontheSettlementCouncilasArgenta’selectedrepresentative.Andeventually,withthedevelopmentofspaceplanesandotherformsofintercontinentaltravel,theWorldCouncilwasestablished.Remarkably--eventhoughIremaineduntethered--mypeopleselectedmetoserveasLangalana’sWergenAmbassadrix. “Myfeelingsforyourfatherhavebeendeadandburiedlong,longago.Thewaywe’dleftthings,thetruthisIneverthoughtI’dseehimagain.”

Againsttheadviceofmymilitaryadvisers,theremainsofFatherandmyhalf-siblings,Lyrra,Olsinore,andVergoweresetablazeonthesummitofPiner’sPeak.Anentireplatoonofarmedsoldierssurroundedtheprocession,onthelookoutforgrubbers.Blue-tintedsnowfellaroundusinsheets,formingacoveringthatmadethegrasslandsappeartiredandaged.Thepyrestillsmoked--thefinalwordshavingbeenspoken--and,outofrespect,thehumansandWergenscongregatedaroundmetosingabroodingthrenody. That’swhenIsawhim,standingoffinthedistance,hisfacecoveredbyascarf,hisyellowtressesblowinginthewind.TenyearslaterandIrecognizedhiminstantly.Itseemedlikeonlyyesterdaysincewe’dspokenforwhatIthoughtwasthefinaltime.

WhenPhinnyrealizedthatI’dspottedhim,heapproached,accompaniedbyanobesefemalehumanwearingafur-linedhoodedcoat.

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“Shimera,”hesaid,huggingme.“I’msosorryaboutyourfamily.” “Phinny?It’sreallyyou!I’dheardthatyourelocatedtoEarth.”

“Yes,IwasnearthesystemwhenIgotwordofOlbodoh’spassing.”“Thegrubbersareeverywhere,Phinny.Everywhere.Theswarmsnowoverwhelmour

strongestbiolelectricforcefields.WhenIfoundFatherandthechildren...itwastoolate...”PhinnyembracedmeagainandthistimeIfellintohisarms.Afterafewseconds,he

pulledawayandgesturedtothepot-belliedfemale.“Shimera,thisismywife,Lois.” “Yourwife?”Ishookherhandinthewaythathumansgreetoneanother,andmyhandtingled.HowIhatedmyselfinthatinstant;howIhatedthatthiswoman’stouchbroughtmepleasure.“I’mhonored,”Isaid. Afterweexchangedpleasantries,Phinnywhisperedsomethingintohiswife’searandshenodded.AWergenpatrolmantookLois’sarmtohelpherwiththeslipperyfooting. Phinnyhookedhisarmwithmine,andIhandedmycanetothepatrolman.Wewalkedseveralstepsaheadofthem,ourfootstepscrunchinginthesnow.“Wergenambassadrix?”hesaid.“My,my,my.WhathappenedtothefarmgirlandteacherIknew?” “Withoutdistractions,shefoundshecouldexpandherhorizons.” Phinnylookedawayfrommeuncomfortably. ThissoundedbittererthanIintendedsoIchangedthesubject.“How’sDr.Crest?” “AuntZooeydiedaboutfiveyearsago.ShestayedinInlandia,convincedtotheveryendthatthesolutiontothegrubberproblemlayingengineering.Whenthelocuststormhit.” “Welostsomanygoodpeoplethatday.Ididn’trealizeshewasoneofthem.” “Shimera,isn’tittimeforyoutoabandonthisworld?Itisn’tsafehere.” “Ican’tgiveuponLangalana,Phinny.Ijustcan’t,”Isaid.“Rememberhoweasyweallthoughtthiswasgoingtobe?Simplypowerupmypeople’sfieldbotsandwelcomethearrivingstarships,right?”Ishookmyheadandsmiled.“Well,justbecausethingshavegottendifficultisnoreasontoquit.Ihaveresponsibilitieshere.” Thesnowhadintensifiedaswewalkedtowardthesettlement,butIcouldstillmakeouttheWergensecurityforcesinourperimeter,followingwiththeirweaponsdrawn.

“Shim,aboutthewayweleftthingsallthoseyearsago...I’msorry.Itwaswrongnottostayintouch.”

Istopped.“Doessheloveyou,Phinny?”Iwhispered.Henodded.“Letmeaskyousomething,”Isaidundermybreathwithaferocitythatsurprised

evenme.“Howdoyouknow?” “Excuseme?” “Howdoyouknow?Howdoyouknowsheisn’tjustphysicallyattractedtoyou,thatsheisn’tjustdrivenbyabiologicalcompulsiontopropagateyourspecies,tocombineherDNAwithyours?” “Shim...”

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“Howdoyouknowit’struelove?”Flakesofbluesnowhungonhishair,andhelookedlikehecarriedagreatweighton

hisshoulders.“IsupposeIdon’t.ButIknowthismuch:shedoesn’thavetoloveme.” Hiswordsdeflatedme.WetookafewmorestepsinsilencebeforeIanswered.“I’vereadmedicaljournalsaboutyourspecies’stateof‘love’:theincreaseddopaminelevels,theheightenedneuralactivityintheventraltegmentalareaofyourmammalianbrains.It’sallchemical,youknow.Alldrivenbytheevolutionaryurgetobreed.Youlookdownonus,butIdon’tthinkyourkindiscapableoftruelove.”

“Idon’tlookdownonyou,”hesaid.Buthegavemethelookagain.Thelookofunmistakablepity. Loisandthepatrolmanhadcaughtuptoussowestartedtowalkagain.Icoughedandclearedmythroat.“AsIwassaying,Phinny,we’renotgivinguponthegrasslands.We’llfigureoutsomewaytodrivebackthegrubbers.Ihaveabsolutefaithinthat.Tellme,canyouandLoisstayafewdays?” Phinnylookedbackathiswifewhogaveasmall,near-imperceptibleshakeofherhead.“No,I’mafraidnot.We’reonourwaytovisitLois’sparentsintheScorniansystem.Plus,Loisispregnantandit’snotreallysafeforustostayheretoolong.”

“Oh?”Istaredathermidsectionandtriedtorecollectmylessonsinhumanprocreation.

Westoppedinfrontoftherowofhearthsofmyneighborhood. “Well,thingshavecertainlychangedhere,”heobserved.

“Yes,alotmoreWergens,eh?CanyouandLoiscomeinforafewminutes?Perhapshaveabowlofchapra?Ormaybesomepreservedwatermelon?Foroldtime’ssake.”

HelookedatLoisagainandthistimesherolledhereyesandtiltedherheadbackslightly.IcouldhaveswornthatthiscausedPhinnytotakeastepbackward,asifaninvisibletetherpulledathim.“No,no,wereallyhavetobegoing.”Heplacedhishandsinmind.“Ipromise,I’llkeepintouchthistime.” “That’sgood,”Isaid.ButasIgaugedLois’sexpressionIthoughtIsawanothernear-undetectableheadshake.AndIrealizedthatthiswouldbethelasttimeIwouldeverseePhinnyagain.

Islowlycirclethetableagain. “Langalanarejectedallofoureffortstotameher,Emissary.Wehadtoevacuatethesettlementsthreesun-cyclesagoandrelocatehere.Thegrubberskeptmultiplyingexponentially.We’veconcludedthatthey’reaformofbiosphericantibody,keyedintoouralienDNA.Thegrasslandsbecameuninhabitable.ThenInlandiafell.TheNorthernandWesternContinentsfarednobetter.EventuallywetriedrelocatingtothefrigidpeaksofLangalana’shighestmountains--butthegrubbersfollowed,scalingtheverticalwallsunimaginableheightstopursueus.Weeventriedconstructingnewsettlementsonremote

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islands,butintimethegrubbershonedinonus,swamacrossthevastoceanstofindus.Forafewyearswethoughtwe’dfoundasolutionwhenthegengineersdevelopedchemicalssignaturesthatcamouflagedouralienDNA.Thegrubbersactuallystoppedattackingandmultiplying,thendisappearedaltogether.Oneday,however,theysuddenlysawpastthechemicalmask,andtheswarmingrecommenced.Hundredsofthousandsofpilgrimshavesincebeenkilled. “Wehavenochoice.It’stimeforustomoveon,Emissary.ForallofourdreamsofsettlingLangalana--somanystarshipstravelingsuchvastdistances--we’renotwelcomehere.SoI’vegiventheorder,”Isay.“TheWergencontingencywillbemovingoutofthissystem,joininghumanityonsomeothernewworld.Glitteria,perhaps?That’swhyyou’rehere,isn’tit?Tocoordinateourrelocationtothenexthumancolony?” TheEmissarystandsupandclearshisthroat.“Thankyoufortellingmeaboutmyfather’schildhood.Thetruthis,wehadafallingoutalongtimeagoandwewereneverascloseasIwouldhaveliked....Beforehedied,myfatherheardIhadbusinessonLangalana.HeaskedtoseemeandrequestedthatIseekyouout,togiveyouamessage.” “Amessage?” Hereachesintotheinsidepocketofhisblueuniformjacketandpullsoutanenvelope.Ilookattheextendedhandand,shiveringslightly,takeitfromhim. TheEmissarypauses.“AsforthebusinessIhavehere...” “Eh?” “Yes,we’dheardaboutthedecisiontomoveyourpeople.”Herubshishandoverhismouth.“Irealizethatwithyourdisplacementtothissatelliteyoumaybeunawareofrecentdevelopments.”Hehesitates.“I’mheretoinformyouthattheGrowthforHumanityBillfinallypassed.” “Excuseme?” “Earth’sCouncilhasdecidedthatourmostprofitablejointventureswiththeWergensarebehindus.We’velearnedalotfromyourpeople,Ambassadrix,forwhichwe’redeeply,deeplygrateful.Butwe’renowabletoproducehigh-qualitybotsonparwiththebestthattheWergenscanproduce...AndtheEvollianshaveofferedusnewtechnologies,newopportunities.” “I...Iunderstand.”Ifeelnumb.“Well...atleasttherewillbeongoingculturalexchangesbetweenourpeoples.Westillhavemuchtolearnfromoneanother.” “I’mafraidIhaven’tmademyselfclear.Ourdisassociationmustbetotal.Youhavetounderstand,Ambassadrix.MypeoplehavedifficultycopingwiththeWergens’...deep,unconditionaladoration.I’mafraidthatit’sbroughtouttheworstinacertainsegmentofourpopulation.Therehavebeensome...abuses...onothercolonies.No,I’mafraidthatit’snotinanyone’sinterestsforourworldstointeractanyfurther.”HestandsatthewindowandstaresatLangalana.“Somanypreciousresources.Whatashame.”Heturns.“Inanyevent,Ireallymustbegoing.” Iclenchmyfists.“Whataboutthecontractsinplacebetweenourpeople?TheJoint

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VentureAgreementsthathavebeensigned?” TheEmissarywalkstothedoorandpausesatthethreshold.“I’msorry.Ifyouwishtofileagrievance,I’msuresomefinancialsettlementcanbereached.”

Afteralongpause,Ianswer.“I’msorrytoo,Emissary.”“Yes,well....Goodlucktoyou,”herepliesawkwardly,andnodsgoodbye.Asheturnsthecornerandhisfootstepsfadedownthehall,Iholduptheyellowed

envelopeinmyhand.Idon’tneedtoopenit;Iknowwhatitsays:Phinnylovedme.Hecametorealizeovertheyearsthathe’dmadeaterriblemistakenotaskingmetomarryhim,thatthelovethatwesharedwaspure,genuine.Butoncehe’drealizedhisterriblemistake,circumstanceshadconspiredagainsthim.BythenhehadresponsibilitiestoLoisandtohisson. Ah,Phinny,I’vebeenoveryouforsolongnow.Itdoesn’tmatteranymore. Ifoldtheenvelope,unopened. Leaningagainstthewindow,IfocusintenselyonthecoldbeautyofLangalana.Theplanethangsthere,soclose,soclosethatIcanalmostsnatchitoutoftheskyandcradleitinmybosom.Ireachforit,butfindtheglassthickandimpenetrable,andtheproximityonlyanillusion. Isighandslowlyrunmyhandalongmycheek,tracingthecrevicesbetweenmyscales.

End