Love Systems Insider: Getting Rid of Flakes & Top Dating Advice

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Love Systems InsiderDate: November 2009

Soul on Getting Rid of Flakes, and Top Dating Advice Daily

According to the Chinese Zodiac, 2009 is the Year of the Ox.

But in dating science, its been known as the Year of the Soul.

I probably should have seen this coming. At the end of last year, Jeremy Soul, already the

worlds #1 Day Game Expert, was voted the pickup and dating instructor of the year at the 2008

PUA Super Conference. (Future won this year.)

Being famous makes you really busy, and we had to push back his highly-anticipatedDaytime

Datingbook to next year because hes been so booked up with live Day Game Workshops and

one-on-one training. Hes helped so many guys this year just SOLVE women and

dating. Especially guys who dont want to rely on nightclubs.

And, he moved to Sweden, where hes living the life of a king with Swedish beauties vying for

his attention. One was just leaving his house when I got him on the phone and asked him towrite for people who havent been able to take his Day Game Live Workshop yet one tip that

any guy, experienced or not, could start using right away.

I think youll agree that he hit a home run.

Stop Chasing Bad Leads: Delete Those Flakes!

- by Jeremy Soul, Love Systems Master Instructor

So, youre determined to get this dating stuff handled and youre going about it the right way.Youre going out lots, working yourDay Game, and approaching a bunch of women day and

night. Youre able to get into good, interesting conversations with attractive women. Youre

even starting to get phone numbers consistently.

(If youre not, you should be reading Magic Bullets and theLove Systems Routines Manual. Im

one of tens of thousands of men whose life turned around with these books. Stop wasting time

and just do it. Youll thank me later.)
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Now, heres where a lot of guys hit the first of their big sticking points.

Some of the phone numbers dont go anywhere. She doesnt call you back or respond to your

text messages. In other words, lots of your phone numbers turn into flakes.

What do you do? Definitely dont fall into the trap of obsessing over your precious numbers.

Dont be the guy who agonizes for hours trying to construct the perfect text message or structure

the perfect phone conversation.

Dont be the guy who persists for weeks with girls over email, text and phone, exhausting

yourself emotionally and mentally to try to come up with ways to win back the girl who you

thought liked you but hasnt responded to your last 48 text messages.

Im not an expert on Phone and Text Game (like all of you, Im devouring Braddock and Mr.

Ms new Ultimate Guide to Text and Phone Game). But, no matter how tight your game is and

how strong your follow ups are, not EVERY number will turn into something.

Maybe she just wasnt that attracted to you and you just didnt read the signs right. A lot of

women give out their number because they dont want to be rude, even if they never plan on

answering when you text or call.

As your game gets better, youll learn to recognize signals of attraction that mean a womanreally does want to meet up with you again, instead of passively agreeing to give you her phone

number just so she doesnt come off as rude.

For example, when I set up a date, I make sure she genuinely is interested in talking with me

again. If a woman starts telling me, Oh yeah, you can try calling me and Ill see if Im free,

thats not enough commitment for me. Ill walk away rather than take a flaky number.

Or, she may have been attracted to you in that moment but you didnt build enough comfort with

her. So, when you contact her later on, that spike of emotional attraction is gone and she cant

logically rationalize why she likes you.

See the Love Systems Triad for more on why this happens.

There could also be something completely external going on. Maybe an ex-boyfriend got back in

touch with her, she met someone else, shes busy or she lost her phone. Who knows and frankly,

who cares? There are so many other things that could have happened; why waste your time

trying to figure it out?
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Obviously, you should keep working continually on your social skills and your ability to build

attraction and comfort (if you dont understand these critical phases of the Emotional

Progression model, you really should readMagic Bullets). But, given all this, you should MOVE

ON from flaky numbers.

So long as you are consistent in who you are and what you do, there will be a steady stream of

women you meet who are into you. The trick is to focus on these girls and cut the flakes out of

your life quickly.

The 80-20 Rule

Lets use a sales analogy.

In sales, you start out trying to make every sale work. You hang onto every phone call and every

hint of a potential sale. You chase and follow up everything. You keep chasing until you get a

clear no from the customer. Even then, sometimes you stay in touch and chase from time to

time.

You learn very quickly that youre wasting a lot of your time. Youre chasing bad leads. It isbetter to move on quickly, so stop wasting your time and spend time finding GOOD leads.

Ever heard of Paretos Law? Its also known as the 80-20 rule. It means you get 80% of the

benefit from an activity with 20% of the effort. 20% of clients provide 80% of profit. In a

business context, its the principle that 80% of your sales revenue comes from 20% of your

clients. Applied to your dating life, it is the principle that 80% of your successes will come from

20% of your efforts and prospects. If one in five girls you talk to ends up meeting with you for a

date, you are doing something right.

Throw out any ideas you have of being a pick up artist with a 76.4% close ratio. That stuffwill mess you up. In the real world, you talk to a bunch of women, be the best, most attractive

man you can be, and you find women who are into you. You will also, along the way, meet a

bunch of women who arent into you.

Even the best guys with women still cant get EVERY woman. Who the hell wants every

woman anyway? Looks really arent everything. Even if she is hot, if she doesnt dig yoursense
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of humoror the kind of person you are, do you really want to pretend to be someone else just so

you can sleep with her?

Talk to all the women you find attractive, and focus on the ones that you click with. These are

your good leads. As you get better, youll be able to filter out the women that youre not going

to click with more quickly and waste less of your time.

Use your resources wisely

So, if a girl doesnt respond to your initial text or phone call, dont bother chasing her it isalmost always not worth following up. If a girl doesnt initially agree to meet for a date or seems

to be forever busy, she is most likely blowing you off but trying not to be rude about it. If after

one date shes flaky about meeting up again, dont waste your time.

A girl who wants to see you again will make it reasonably easy for you by agreeing to meet up

or, if she is busy, by suggesting an alternative.

It may be worth occasionally touching base with people (sometimes their situations change, e.g.

a girl dumps her boyfriend), but dont agonise over it or make it a priority. You should focus

your time on stronger, more immediate leads.

Magic Bullets (again) has some good material on how to touch base without much

effort. Holidays are also a great opportunity to send mass text greeting messages to all of the

women in your phone, including buried leads.

Good luck, and remember that time is your most precious asset in this life.

Jeremy Soul

Click to seewhat people are saying about Jeremy Soul this year.

Learn more from Jeremy Soul.

On audio:

Vol. 26 Direct Game
http://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-35-humor-braddock-cajunhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-35-humor-braddock-cajunhttp://www.lovesystems.com/magic-bulletshttp://www.lovesystems.com/soulhttp://www.theattractionforums.com/tags/review_soul.htmlhttp://www.theattractionforums.com/tags/review_soul.htmlhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-26-direct-game-soul-badboy-cortezhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-35-humor-braddock-cajunhttp://www.lovesystems.com/magic-bulletshttp://www.lovesystems.com/soulhttp://www.theattractionforums.com/tags/review_soul.htmlhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-26-direct-game-soul-badboy-cortez


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Vol. 33 Logistics: Taking Her Home

Vol. 34 Female Psychology (with Savoy)

Vol. 38 Handling Tests

To book Jeremy Soul forindividualized training, email or call 800 680 0821 or 323 836 0150.

Top Dating Advice Every Day

I get a bunch of emails asking if this Love Systems insider (LSi) newsletter can be made daily,

instead of the usually-weekly-unless-Im-on-vacation that it is now.

No. Thats never going to happen.

Unlike so-called dating advice newsletters that are written out-of-character by internet

marketers who all sound alike (did they read the same book or what?), every word of the Love

Systems insider is written or edited by guys who are actually in the field, using this material in

their own lives.

Thats why Love Systems material is usually a bit more advanced (and doesnt pretend to makethings simpler than they are), because we dont produce anything we wouldnt use ourselves.

As you can imagine, this takes a while. Ive been writing the LSi every week since late 2004,

and they dont get any quicker if you want to do the job right.

The average LSi has about 2,500 words. That means in the last 5 years, its had 625,000

words. If the average book is around 80,000 words, thats approximately 8 full-length books.

(Maybe I should have just written 8 more books?)

But, to compromise, weve created or sponsored a whole bunch of ways you can get fresh Love

Systems and continuing motivation every day. Pick a few of these and sign up. None of them

cost anything.

1) TWITTER

Now easier just sign up for the Love Systems group account.

2) BLOGS
http://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-33-logistics-taking-her-home-soul-johnny-wolfhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-34-female-psychology-savoy-soulhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-38-handling-tests-soul-kisserhttp://www.lovesystems.com/individualizedmailto:[email protected]://twitter.com/LS_Savoy/lsinstructorshttp://twitter.com/LS_Savoy/lsinstructorshttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-33-logistics-taking-her-home-soul-johnny-wolfhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-34-female-psychology-savoy-soulhttp://www.lovesystems.com/audio/vol-38-handling-tests-soul-kisserhttp://www.lovesystems.com/individualizedmailto:[email protected]://twitter.com/LS_Savoy/lsinstructorshttp://twitter.com/LS_Savoy/lsinstructors


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Many top LS instructors have blogs. Subscribe to them (dont just glance and forget) for daily

tips and motivation:

Savoy

Big Business

Bonsai

Braddock

Cajun

Daxx

Future

Keychain

Soul

Starlight

Tenmagnet

3) THE ATTRACTION FORUMS

Thousands of new posts every day a great tool. Especially check out Classic Writings, Best

Of and Field Reports.

4) FACEBOOK

Yeah, okay. I said we wouldnt do Facebook and many of you complained, so now we do:

Savoy

Love Systems

5) THE LOUNGE

Get exclusive advanced material, individual questions answered by senior instructors, exclusive

field reports, etc.

(Login URL redacted; for Live Training graduates only.)
http://therealsavoy.blogspot.com/http://www.bigbiznss.com/http://www.asiandatingcoach.com/http://www.braddocksblog.com/http://www.cajunsblog.com/http://www.daxxterity.com/http://www.futuristicwords.com/http://www.adventuresofkeychain.com/http://lifewithsoul.com/http://www.thestarlightblog.com/http://www.tenmagnet.com/http://www.theattractionforums.com/http://www.facebook.com/lovesystemshttp://www.facebook.com/lovesystemspagehttp://therealsavoy.blogspot.com/http://www.bigbiznss.com/http://www.asiandatingcoach.com/http://www.braddocksblog.com/http://www.cajunsblog.com/http://www.daxxterity.com/http://www.futuristicwords.com/http://www.adventuresofkeychain.com/http://lifewithsoul.com/http://www.thestarlightblog.com/http://www.tenmagnet.com/http://www.theattractionforums.com/http://www.facebook.com/lovesystemshttp://www.facebook.com/lovesystemspage


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Love Systems Insider: Getting Rid of Flakes & Top Dating Advice