Making Miracles Happen - Catie Kirke - ART Your Life · making miracles happen is all about. We can use the Fear-Busting Formula to move from feeling ... and every day at that job

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© 2012 – Catie Kirke & Monique Parker

Making Miracles Happen

INTERVIEW WITH CATIE KIRKE

***PDF REFERENCE SHEET***

CATIE KIRKE is the director of Catie Kirke & Associates & founder of

the ground breaking and highly successful ART Your Life Intensive,

fulfilling her mission

“To help women across the world, love their

bodies, themselves and their lives”

Catie is a highly acclaimed presenter and coach who brings her

passion and leadership skills to help make miracles happen for

everyone she works with!

Visit www.artyourlife.com.au to find out how you can share in the

magic of an ART Your Life Intensive near you – now online for

women across Australia and beyond.

MONIQUE PARKER is a Brisbane-based marketing strategist and

consultant and deep dive interviewer! To find out more about

Monique visit www.moniqueparker.com

Please download the accompanying audio interview first and use

the guide as a reference for the content covered.

http://www.artyourlife.com.au/

http://www.moniqueparker.com/




Monique: Hello, and welcome to this special training call on Making Miracles

Happen in Your Life. I’m Monique Parker, and today I have the amazing Catie Kirke from ART Your Life joining us on the call to share with us some of the techniques that she has used to create powerful change in her own life and then also as well to create amazing change in the lives of hundreds of women across Australia. Catie, thank you so much for joining us today.

Catie: Thank you, Monique, and it’s an absolute pleasure being here. Monique: Well, I have to say, Catie, I’m really excited about having you on this

call to share with us your FEAR BUSTING FORMULA, because I know that it’s a powerful process that can create extraordinary change in your life. So, just before we dive into what that process is, are you able to share with us what is that process is called and why it’s so important for people in helping them create the change that they want?

Catie: Thank you Monique! The Fear-Busting Formula is all about

discovering how to turn your fears into absolutely powerful allies in helping you achieve your dreams – which is what making miracles happen is all about.

We can use the Fear-Busting Formula to move from feeling

disempowered in certain areas of life to feeling empowered; from feeling stuck to being able to shift.

So often, whether we realize it or not, it is FEAR that holds us back in

our lives. Once we talk about fear and learn to understand the impact that it has on our lives, we start to see miracles happen all the time.

Monique: Ok, now before we dive into the steps that you go through in Your

Fear-Busting Formula, I think Catie it would be really great if we can give people, perspective around fear. As you said, it’s something that you go through with almost all of your clients and it’s something that helps people achieve big breakthroughs.

Yet when I say the word “fear,” what comes into my mind is something

to try to avoid or overcome, whereas I know you have a different perspective of fear – where fear is an integral part of life that can actually HELP us… can you care of elaborate on that?

Catie: Fear really is a part of life - an inevitable companion that can

either hold us back, or actually motivate us in many ways. If you think way back in time, humans have always had a fear, a flight or




fight mechanism, wired within them. In this day and age, not many of us are at risk of extinction, particularly in the Western World, but that hard-wired mechanism of flight or fight is still within us and with the way it is today, is that it can so often be a fear of, for example, fear of not being good enough.

I’ll give you my example of this… two years ago, I had been working in

a position at work for about four years, and at that point in my life, I knew that I wanted something more, that I wanted something different. I really did feel quite disempowered, and every day at that job felt like “Groundhog Day” where every day was the same. I woke up. I “did the do”, and spent some time wondering what the hell my purpose was in life.

I knew in my heart – I’d known it for years – that I wanted to do

something more about working with women and working with teenagers, because of many of my own life experiences. I knew that I wanted to learn more in order to help women and girls create change in their life. But, I was sitting in a job, not doing anything about that learning, not moving forward, because I was paralysed by my fears.

I thought oh gosh, can I do it? Will I be able to do it? How do I do it?

What can I do? Who would want to listen to me anyway? I’m too old now. Have I left making a huge career change too late? What if I can’t do it? What if something goes wrong? But when I became aware of the fear strategy, I realized that all of those “what-ifs” and that self-doubt all boiled down to a fear of not being good enough - and it was my fear of not being good enough that was actually holding me back, and it had even held me back from enrolling in some courses to do some learning to grow.

When I realized that, I went oh my gosh, am I going to let a fear of

not being good enough grow into this incredibly huge, enormous creature that had become so much more than not being good enough – and all of the anxiety and emotions associated with that? And it was the realization that it was fear of not being good enough that took it down to one little pinpoint, and I could go, well, crap - ALL of these things have come about from me fearing that I’m not good enough!

Monique: So you had all of these emotions happening, but really what you’re

saying is, once you learned to identify it, it was really just one core fear, and that was the fear of not being good enough.




Catie: Yes, there was so much emotion there… but I had no recognition that the emotion was really a symptom that that fear was impacting my life and stopping me from doing something I really wanted to do.

Monique: That’s great. I think, Catie, that’s just the perfect lead-in to Step One

of Your Fear-Busting Formula, which is to really identify what the root cause of your fear is.

Catie: Step One of the Fear-Busting Formula is to discover what the

causes of fear in life are and that there are only THREE root fears that hold us back. Once we understand what they are, it really gives you the ability to reclaim your power in any situation. Not just what the three fears are, but what they are for you and what impact they’re having on your life and what they mean for you at the time.

Monique: Okay. So, what are those three fears? Because you know in my mind,

I think that there are hundreds of fears. You’re saying there’s just three? So, what are those?

Catie: There are just three real fears in life – and every other fear that we

think we are experiencing at the time is actually just a symptom or the result of one of these base fears.

The three fears in life are:

1. The fear of not being loved 2. The fear of not being good enough 3. The fear of not belonging

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- ***PLEASE REFER TO THE AUDIO INTERVIEW

FOR A DEEPER DISCUSSION ABOUT HOW THESE THREE FEARS RELATE TO YOU AND THE

VARIOUS SITUATIONS IN YOUR LIFE*** ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Catie: Once you understand what the three fears are, or if you even know what the three fears are, then what we do in a coaching context or in the ART Your Life program, is have a look at what is happening in someone’s life, and support someone to have a look at what they would like to change in their life and what’s holding them back.

Then, we literally draw down to what the actual fear is. Is it a fear of

not being loved that’s holding someone back from speaking up in the relationship they’re in to express what they need? If they are fearful that their partner may not love them anymore or may leave them, then most likely the true fear is the fear of not being loved. Once we understand what the core fear is, that’s when we can actually look that fear in the face and ask ourselves: how is this fear playing out in my life? What is the impact?

And even more specifically… what has that fear cost me? What is it

costing me now? In my own example that I shared earlier about my work situation, the fear of not being good enough had cost me several years of not waking up in the morning and feeling excited about my day, of not doing what I love to do, of having a job that drained me and left me feeling empty. How my life has changed since facing that fear! My work for me now has so much meaning and purpose. I wake up and I enjoy what I’m doing – it brings me energy and joy. It doesn’t even feel like “work” anymore… whereas for years my fears had kept me trapped and held me back from that exciting future.

Monique: And getting present to that cost in your life and the impact on

your life, it’s a definite component and part of your fear-busting process, isn’t it, because it’s really important for people to do that BEFORE they can move on to step two of your process.

Catie: Very much, Monique – and not just to look at what it has cost you, but

to dive deeper and explore how it has cost those around you and the loved ones in your life. For the last few years that I’d been in that position I mentioned, I’d been a bit of a cranky person in the home environment, waking up being grumpy about going to work, and unenthusiastic about life in general. Every day was another day. I also wasn’t being an enthusiastic team member loving my job – which was costing others around me in the work environment.

Monique: I love that, Catie. Basically what you’re saying is that reclaiming

your power is when you make the choice to NOT let your current fears dictate your future. And the only way to do that is to identify what the real fear is and then look at what the impact and cost of that fear is. Once you get really present to that, then you have an access to creating a new future. So, that’s a little bit of a sum-up of step




one of Your Fear-Busting Formula, so let’s now look at Step Two in Your Fear-Busting Formula. Explain for us what step two is and why it’s so important.

Catie: Step Two is all about the WHY. When people find a big enough

why, the how takes care of itself. In other words, when there’s a compelling enough reason why you want to change something, we are more motivated to take the steps required. When we tap into a powerful WHY – it becomes like an elixir of courage that enables us to stand up and say NO to our fears and YES to doing what it takes to facilitate that change.

Oftentimes, the source of our “why” needs to be found outside of our

self. As women, we are often much more likely to do something for someone else than we are for ourselves – and we find change easier when it is not just for us alone.

In my own example, the powerful motivator for change was not

me, but actually my teenage daughter. You see, I realized that here I was telling her “Honey, you can do anything you dream. The world is your oyster. You can create and have any experience you want.” But I was telling her to do something that I was NOT doing myself. I was not being a role model for her.

The minute I realized that not living my dreams was costing

my daughter the opportunity to live hers, I found my why. My reason for change was to become a role model for my

daughter, because what walks in the mother, or what walks in the parent, runs in the child. When I make miracles happen in my life, she will see that they are possible, and she will make miracles happen in her life.

So it’s really important that you delve deep to discover your why

(which is something I help participants in the ART Your Life program do), as it is your why that becomes your FUEL – your wood for the fire.

Catie: I’ve worked with a lot of clients who want to lose weight, and I find

that as long as the reason for wanting to lose weight is literally just about wanting to look better or fit into a new dress, then sometimes when a chocolate cake is sitting there in front of you or the snooze button on your alarm clock is right there so you don’t have to get out of bed and exercise, there’s no internal fuel to change those patterns.




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***PLEASE REFER TO THE AUDIO INTERVIEW

FOR A DEEPER DISCUSSION ON ROLE MODELLING, FINDING YOUR “WHY”, AND CREATING CHANGE FOR A HEALTHIER &

HAPPIER YOU. *** --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Monique: Catie, let me ask you – is digging deep to find your why a confronting

process? Catie: Yes. Step Two is much easier in theory than in practice and it needs to

be confronting, in order to have people get that emotional charge that they need to fuel that why.

The first time that I recognized that a fear of not being good enough

had been holding me back in so many areas of my life… Monique, I’ll be really open here – I cried for a couple of days, and I literally said to myself, my god, Catie, you’ve let these years go past and what a waste. That’s how I felt. I was really confronted by it, and then instead of feeling sorry for myself, I chose to use that confrontation to really catalyze me to do something.

Once you get present to the impact that your fears have had on your

life and you want to choose to be free from them in the future, you need to imagine all of the benefits of choosing to let it go.

Monique: So after having that moment of confrontation and breakdown, you

were able to re-imagine your future and what’s possible. We’re going to talk about Step Three in just a moment, but I just wanted to make it really clear for everyone listening that this is a process that is best-facilitated by a coach who’s able to ask you those hard questions and keep drilling down until you reach those emotional buttons.

Without that, you could listen to this audio or read a book, but it’s

actually having that experience inside yourself where you are fully present to the impacts and then present to the possibilities that creates transformation.




Catie: Monique, I love that one, because yes, it is so much more powerful to do this within a program such as ART Your Life, because there’s such a high level of accountability and support. And also, I found over the years that I could confide in girlfriends, but having a chat with someone over a cup of coffee or a glass of wine isn’t necessarily the best way to facilitate change in your life. Most of our girlfriends love us the way we are, and support us – rather than challenge us.

I don’t know about you, but I was one of these people that for years

had self-development books on my bookshelf, and I read so many self-development books. I actually had some on fear and creating one’s power, and I won’t name them all, but there were so many…. And I felt like I knew it all because I’d read it. But the thing was I’d actually intellectualized it all. Because here’s the thing – I didn’t really know it, because I wasn’t able to use it in my life to create the life I so wanted and deserved.

Monique: I really like that you say that, Catie, because people often think they

know a concept or a technique, but you don’t know something until you’re living it or until you’ve experienced it.

And I like what you said about the difference between talking with

your girlfriends or having a coaching session with a trained coach. Because a true coach will see you not as who you are currently, but who you are as your highest self – even if can’t see it for yourself. So, I just wanted to get people present to how personal coaching and programs such as ART Your Life can really fast track things – so that you can go from awareness and education to experiencing it and living it.

On that note, let’s go straight into Step Three, which really about

making it happen and how people do that. So, do you want to share with us what Step Three in Your Fear-Busting Formula is and what’s involved?

Catie: Step Three is all about the “how” steps. Step Three is all about

“doing the do” and it’s that transition from knowing to experiencing to behaving and to making it all happen.

Catie: One of the “how’ to’s” is to discover how to passively manipulate

yourself – which is all about setting into place structures or wheels of motion that are designed to take choice out of the equation and have you succeed!

For example, you might organize and commit to going for a power

“walk and talk” with your girlfriend Sally on Tuesday and with Emma




on Thursday. Now, you know that if it was just you going on a power walk on Tuesday, come Tuesday afternoon if you didn’t feel like it (or any excuse in the book came up) you wouldn’t go. But because Sally’s meeting you there at 5.00pm, you don’t want to let her down, so you go – no questions! So you’ve passively manipulated yourself by making a commitment in advance, and removing choice from the equation.

Monique: So what you’re saying is that you can take choice out of the

equation LATER by setting up and creating situations or commitments in advance NOW.

One thing you said in relation to girlfriends, and it’s something that’s

been a little bit of theme on this call actually, is that we’re more likely to do something for someone else than we are ourselves. Whilst that may not sound that great to say that out loud, once we know that to be true then we can actually use that to manipulate ourselves to do the things we know that are going to be good for us.

Catie, let’s bring that back to your example earlier, where you were

stuck in a job that wasn’t meaningful for you that you didn’t enjoy. You had your insight that the root cause of what was keeping you there was a fear of not being good enough. Now, after you had that amazing insight, how did YOU passively manipulate yourself to take the next step?

Catie: Monique, as I’ve said to you, I’d had a couple of days of crying when I

had this realization and I was determined not to let a fear of not being good enough hold me back in that area of my life anymore.

To give you some context, my role at work required me to run a big

event at a certain time of the year, and I knew that I could never apply for annual leave at that time. During my weekends, I had been flying interstate to pursue part-time studies in coaching and human behaviour, and on one of these weekends, I had the opportunity to sign up for my neuro-linguistic programming master practitioner training.

The dates scheduled for this particular training were the same dates of

the big event at work that I knew I couldn’t get leave for… so I knew that if I signed up for the training, I would need to resign from my job. Resigning from my job would mean that I would have no choice but to start the business that I had been dreaming of for so long.

Immediately, the voices of fear began to go off in my head: How will I

pay my bills? How will I support my daughter? Can I do it? What if I




can’t make this business work? What if it fails? I realized that again, these fears were all just different variations of that same fear that had been holding me back: the fear of not being good enough.

I decided not to give those voices of doubt a chance to take hold - so I

walked to the back of the room at this training, gave them my credit card and I enrolled in the training then and there. I passively manipulated myself, Monique, because I knew if I paid the deposit and signed up for it, that I would have made that investment in my future and I would have to go back to Darwin and hand in my resignation.

Monique: I love it. So, you had no choice but to do it! Catie: Yes! Now, I’m not saying it was easy… my heart was pounding and my

hands were shaking, and I was thinking Oh my god what have I done? But it was too late… and that’s the great thing about passive

manipulation - it takes choice out of the equation at the time when doubts and fears can set in.

I made my choice from an empowered platform and removed

the option to change my mind later when I was feeling disempowered. In an essence, I made a very powerful choice to choose to give myself no choice when the fears set in later.

Monique: Catie this is such an important distinction that you’ve shared, and I

know that it is one of the reasons why your ART Your Life programs are so powerful… women make a powerful choice upfront to commit themselves to a 7-week program. All they need to do is say YES upfront and pay their deposit, and it removes the choice to quit on themselves later – because once their fears and doubts set in it’s too late, they’re already within a committed 7-week program of support, momentum, and accountability!

Catie: Yes, and the program is specifically designed that way, because

unfortunately, the choice to quit on ourselves is the choice that many people make, and it becomes a pattern to quit on ourselves that becomes our way of life. ART Your Life breaks that pattern and helps people to create new, empowering neurological patterns.




You also mentioned accountability, which is another key component of Step Three of the Fear-Busting Formula. If you want to create big change in your life, it is really important to set up a structure of support – so that other people are “holding the space” for you to step into the change you want.

Let’s use the example of setting up accountability in relation to

exercise… A beautiful example is in this most recent ART Your Life program – there was a woman who joined who hadn’t exercised in about six months. In the program, there was the opportunity for her to join three 6am group fitness sessions, but she didn’t feel she could do it, as she’d never been disciplined enough in her life to ever do anything like that before. So what we encouraged her to do, was to post this message on our closed Facebook group: “Hi ladies. I’m going to be going to the ART Fit sessions on a Monday, Wednesday, Friday. I drive from Suburb X to the sessions – who would like a lift?”

It turns out that there were three ladies who lived around that suburb

who were delighted to be sharing the 25-minute ride. So, as soon as one replied and said YES to her offer, she had to do it! Throughout the 7-weeks, all three of them drove to and from the sessions together. Now that is accountability plus – they made it to every single session!

Monique: I love it. That’s just such an easy example for everyone to understand

– and I know that helping people to create accountability structures in different areas of their lives is something that you help people do through the ART Your Life program.

Now… how about an example of how you’ve used accountability in

your own life to create BIG results in other areas of your life? Catie: Ok, I’ll give you another example… when I was first studying human

behaviour, I learned some fascinating insights into the feminine/masculine dynamics and our behaviours within relationships. I was intrigued, and I wanted to learn more and really start living it – and I knew that a great way to get a deeper understanding of something is to teach it.

Catie: I knew that this information was incredibly powerful and that I wanted

to share it. So instead of me just sitting around forever and thinking to myself “I’d really like to share this information” I decided to take one simple real-life action to get it out in the world. I put a post on our Facebook group and said “Ladies, I’m running a workshop on insightful relationships on such and such a date. Book it now if you would like to come along.”




And that way, I couldn’t sit alone in my fears – I’d created something

real that involved other people – it was a commitment, I was accountable. So in other words, it was happening!

Now, I would like to point out that at this point in my life, I was single.

I wasn’t in a relationship and my past relationships hadn’t worked out – and most of the people in my circle knew that! To be honest, I was totally doubting myself – Who am I to run a workshop on relationships? But… I knew that again, it was all about the fear of not being good enough and I didn’t want that to hold me back, which is why I put the post on Facebook straight away, so that I didn’t give my fears time to take over.

And now, the funny thing is that my relationship workshop is one of

my most popular workshops. And I’m so grateful for the changes that I’ve seen in the relationships of the women and men who’ve done the program. I’ve had women who’ve been married for twenty years telling me that they’ve rekindled their romance and it’s like they’re on their second honeymoon. And I think to myself, thank goodness I moved through my own fears to bring this work to the women who need it!

Monique: What I really love, Catie, is the distinction that you’ve just shared –

that making miracles happen in your life isn’t just about you. As you start living your best life, you bring light to the world around you – to you family, to your friends, to your colleagues and to your community.

I want everyone listening to this to imagine if Catie had sat in her fears

and never brought that workshop to all of these women – what’s the impact of that? I think a lot of people underestimate the impact of their life and the impact that NOT stepping through their fears actually has on their loved ones and their whole community around them. I just want everyone to get present to the fact that when you start making miracles happen in your own life, you create new possibilities for others around you, and the ripple effect is huge.

Monique: Speaking of that ripple effect, Catie, I know that there have been just

so many examples of miracles and changes that have been created in the lives of your clients. Can you share with us some examples about how your clients have used each step of the Fear-Busting Formula in areas of their lives to create massive shifts?

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***PLEASE REFER TO THE AUDIO INTERVIEW FOR DETAILED REAL-LIFE EXAMPLES OF HOW

2 CLIENTS APPLIED THE FORMULA IN THE AREAS OF BUSINESS/CAREER AND

RELATIONSHIPS*** --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Make a note of your own insights from…

THE “AMY” EXAMPLE

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THE “MARY” EXAMPLE

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Monique: Catie, I know that what we’ve covered here on the call today, the Fear-

Busting Formula, is just one of the many tools that you give to women during your programs to help them create change. The changes on the outside are massive, but often they are a result of something really ridiculously small that we have manifested inside of our minds and made into reality when in fact they’re not. Often, the real miracle is simply when we realize this – and then go through the steps to change it.

Catie, I know that you’ve created a cheat sheet, for everyone listening

on the call to help them go from fear to freedom.




Catie: Yes, the From Fear to Freedom Cheatsheet will take listeners through the process we’ve talked about today – through steps 1, 2, 3 – to help you identify what the fear is, what it’s actually costing you now and in the future, and what it would mean to be free of this fear. This cheatsheet is a powerful resource that can be used again and again. It’s something that I use in my life on a regular basis, and I am so delighted to be able to share with our listeners.

Monique: I think that based on everything that we’ve covered today on the call,

everyone will be able to see just how valuable this formula is for creating breakthrough change in your life. I would like to add that, of course, nothing beats a LIVE, in person experience – which they can do via Catie’s ART Your Life programs. Catie, can you quickly share with us just a little bit more about ART Your Life and how they can find out more?

Catie: ART Your Life is a seven-week program that we run that helps

women transform their lives, their bodies and their futures – from the inside out. It includes workshops, health and fitness, personality profiling, and personal coaching. It is a phenomenal journey that has enabled so many women to create their own mini miracles and enjoy a completely new experience of life!

If you would like to find out more about ART Your Life, please visit

www.catiekirke.com or www.artyourlife.com.au We would love to hear your thoughts and feedback – so please do

connect with us on Facebook here: www.facebook.com/CatieKirke

http://www.catiekirke.com/

http://www.artyourlife.com.au/

http://www.facebook.com/CatieKirke




CATIE KIRKE’S FEAR BUSTING FORMULA >>Step 1: Discover WHAT your fears really are!

There are only 3 root fears that hold us back in life, and once you understand what these are you have the ability to reclaim your power in any situation. Dig deep below the surface to get to the heart of the matter and see your situation clearly for what it REALLY is. Once you come face to face with your true fears, you’ll realize they’re actually not that scary at all! My notes:

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>>Step 2: Find your reason “WHY”

Get clear on what your fear has cost you, how it has held you back, and what the IMPACT of that has been on your own life, and those that you love. Make sure you hit your own emotional hotspots and discover a strong enough WHY that will become a powerful motivator for change. My notes:

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>>Step 3: Decide HOW to make it happen

Learn how to use your fear to passively manipulate yourself to success… Take "choice" out of the equation and set yourself up in situations that ensure you succeed. Keep your fears accountable to others and be powerfully supported to move through your fear and toward your new future! My notes:

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Making Miracles Happen - Catie Kirke - ART Your Life · making miracles happen is all about. We can use the Fear-Busting Formula to move from feeling ... and every day at that job