Men’s Weekend I: Knights Tales · CFC Singles for Christ Page 8 Men's Weekend 1: Knights Tales If we are to help men discover and live out authentic manhood, we must look at a model

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CFC Singles for Christ

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Men’s Weekend I:

Knights Tales

Page 1 Men's Weekend 1: Knights Tales

CFC SINGLES FOR CHRIST

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Men’s Weekend I:

Knights Tales Manual v.2011

Men's Weekend 1: Knights Tales

Men’s Weekend I:

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CFC Singles for Christ Page 2


About the Weekend

The Knights Tales , SFC Men’s Weekend 1 is the first weekend retreat designed for the men of CFC Singles for Christ. This weekend has 2 basic goals:

1. Help the men understand the true definition of manhood.

2. Challenge the men to live as modern-day knights, ready to offer their lives for the cause of Christ.

The Sessions

The retreat is divided into four sessions.

� Session 1: Authentic Manhood. This session tackles the definition of true manhood, who bestows it, and what it takes to live out authentic manhood.

� Session 2: A Vision of Manhood. This session takes a deeper look into the heart of a true man. It examines the three basic desires that God placed in a man’s heart.

� Session 3: The Code of Conduct. This session explores the purpose for man’s creation and what responsibilities God gave to man. It talks about how Adam, the first man, fails to live out this call and thus brings suffering to all men. It also talks about how Christ, the new Adam, restores man by fulfilling God’s call that Adam failed to follow.

� Session 4: A Cause to Fight For. The final session talks about the need for men to step up to be modern-day knights. It will call the men to embrace the cause God has given to SFC. It will challenge them to live out the 7 core values, to be committed to their brothers, and to embrace modern-day knighthood in service to Christ and others.

The Dynamics

The activities supplementing the sessions include group discussions, personal reflection, meditation, vocal prayers, and some physical activities. The team can make adjustments based on any logistical or pastoral resources available for the retreat.

The Team

The team comprises of a Team Leader/Retreat master, Servants, Facilitators, Music Ministry, and Logistics.

The Speakers

The speaker profiles should be all men, preferably top leaders in CFC or SFC. He must study the talk and preferably read the references included in this manual to have a clear grasp of the concepts and points of the talk. He can employ sharers in his talk only if time permits and at the concurrence of the Team Leader.

The Schedule

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The Knights Tales Retreat can be given on a 2-day schedule but can also be modified to fit a 1-day schedule. Below is the suggested 2-day format:

Day 1

Morning

08:00 Arrival and Registration

08:30 Gathering, teaching of songs

09:00 Worship

09:30 Welcome remarks and Orientation

10:00 Session 1: Authentic Manhood

11:00 Group Discussion

11:30 Wrap Up/Lunch

Afternoon

01:00 Gathering, teach song

01:15 Afternoon Praise

01:30 Session 2: A Vision of Manhood

02:15 Personal Reflection

02:45 Break

03:30 Session 3: The Code of Conduct

04:15 Healing Session with Confession

05:15 Mini-praisefest

05:35 Break. Prepare for Mass/Continue with confession

06:00 Mass

Evening

07:00 Dinner

08:00 Fellowship

09:00 Activity: Man-to-Man talk or Eucharistic Adoration

10:00 Closing prayer

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Day 2

Morning

05:00 Wake up. Morning exercises.

06:30 Common Prayer time

07:00 Breakfast

08:00 Gather, teach songs

09:00 Worship

09:30 Session 4: A Cause to Fight For

10:15 Knighting Ceremony

11:00 Praisefest

11:30 Closing remarks. End of Retreat.

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SFC Men's Weekend 1: KNIGHTS TALES

Session 1: Authentic Manhood

Objectives:

1. Define what constitutes authentic manhood.

2. Highlight the traits of a modern day knight and how our community prepares us

for it.

3. Help the brothers reflect on the people and experiences that have influenced

their manhood.

Key Messages:

1. Authentic manhood is not necessarily the same as the secular world defines it.

2. Masculinity is not something a man discovers by himself but is bestowed upon

him by other men.

3. In spite of the many obstacles, the SFC Brother is called to be the modern day knight.

Tenor:

Alive, exciting

Speaker’s Profile:

Someone who is a father or is a father-like figure to brothers. Someone who exemplifies what it

is to be a true man.

Activity: Proving Grounds – A Test of Manhood

There are three events for this activity: push-ups, sit-ups, and arm wrestling. Count the number

of men who are attending the retreat. Have them count off by threes. All the 1’s will be doing

push ups, the 2’s will be doing sit-ups; the 3’s will do arm wrestling. The arm wrestling

participants should be equal in number so any odd participant will be added to the push up

group.

• Do the event one at a time so the other men can cheer for the contestants.

• Push-ups – In one minute, the brothers will do as many push-ups as they can. Tally the

scores after one minute and congratulate the brother who has the highest score.

• Sit-ups - Have a brother assist each contestant by holding down their feet (to prevent it

from lifting as they do the sit up) and also to count how many sit ups they can do in a

minute. Designate a timekeeper. Have them do sit-ups for one minute and tally the

scores afterward. Congratulate the brother who has the highest score.

• Arm wrestling – Find a sturdy table where participants can arm wrestle. Have the

brothers clasp their right hands together with their left hand down beside their

opponent’s right elbow to prevent it from slipping. Begin the match. Give them two

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minutes to arm wrestle. If both are still up after two minutes, declare a draw. If any of

the brothers wins the match, have both of them shake hands in the spirit of true

sportsmanship.

I. The Measure of a Man.

A. The secular standards of manhood are often gauged by:

• Physique - his manly looks, fitness, and abilities

• Power - his influence and authority over others

• Prosperity - his money, the kind of car he drives, or how big his house is

• Prowess - his ability to attract and seduce women, and father many children

B. Crisis of Manhood

While the above qualities of manhood are not intrinsically evil, it is the lack of other

meaningful qualities that actually makes a real man incomplete. In other words, they

are called "half-men."

1. Men can be physically strong but without internal strength and discipline, they

are unable to control their passions and urges.

• Men who are unable to contain their anger can be violent. The result could

mean battered wives, road rage, and murder.

• Men who are unable to contain their passions end up getting addicted to

vices, drugs, pornography, and illicit sex.

2. Powerful men who do not understand the meaning of justice, mercy, and

stewardship can become corrupt officials. Worse, they can become dictators

causing the suffering of millions.

• Politicians have the opportunity to help the people but corrupt officials just

use their power and influence for personal gain.

• History will never forget the heinous crimes that Hitler committed that

caused the lives of millions of innocent people in the death camps.

3. Prosperous men have the ability to bless others with their wealth. But without a

generous heart, selfishness can set in a man's heart causing him to acquire more

for himself but never really find any satisfaction.

• Luke 12:16-21 tells the parable of the rich fool. He enjoyed an abundance of

wealth but all is in vain once death comes knocking at his door.

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• Some examples: Greedy businessmen have caused many corporations to go

bankrupt because of fraud (e.g. Enron scandal 2001, Wall Street scandal

2008).

4. Men who judge their masculinity according to their sexual prowess only end up

using women.

• Their failure to honor and treat women with respect has led to unwanted

pregnancies, abuse and even rape.

• Wives have become desperate because their husbands have gone looking for

younger women.

• 65 % of children in the US remain fatherless. Of that 65 %, many do not even

have a close relationship with their father.* (US Census Bureau, Living

Arrangements of Children: 2004 (feb 2008)

• This crisis of manhood is borne from man's own struggle with his identity. When

a boy grows up to be a man without a strong grasp of authentic manhood,

society suffers a blow. Hearts are wounded. Homes are broken. Sons grow up

fatherless.

II. Bestowing Masculinity

A. No self-made man

Masculinity is not something a man discovers by himself. It is defined and bestowed

upon him by other men.

1. Family - Fathers play an important role in defining for his son what a true man

should be. Author Robert Lewis, from his book Raising A Modern-Day Knight

writes, "Something about a father's physical and emotional presence gives life to

a boy. Just being around dad - watching him shave, hearing him laugh, touching

his flesh - invests a son with large doses of male energy. And this emotional

capital cannot be gained anywhere other than in the presence of a father."*

2. Community - Communities in the past bestowed masculinity upon boys through

ceremonies. For example, African tribal practices require boys to undergo

training and bloody initiation. This process was painful and hard but once a boy

completes this rite of passage, his tribe publicly welcomes him as a man.

3. Church - Having been entrusted with Sacred Scripture and with the revelation of

authentic manhood found in Christ, the Church plays an important role in

defining the true identities of men and women as sons and daughters of God.

The priest alone has the distinct privilege of witnessing to all men how God is

Father to us all. Churches bear images of the suffering Christ that speak volumes

about what authentic manhood is all about.

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If we are to help men discover and live out authentic manhood, we must look at a model

to follow that involves family, community, and Church in the formation of men. A most

fitting model we can follow is that of knighthood.

B. A Path to Authentic Manhood

• With a crested shield, battle-worn armor and a long sword, knights of the middle

ages have often been a symbol of courage and bravery. Young boys are

fascinated by the tales of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round table.

Despite the shortcomings of some knights and their not so glorious reputation,

knighthood offers us a model to follow if we are to help restore authentic

manhood in this day and age.

• Robert Lewis highlights three important elements what knighthood did for a

man:

1. It provided a vision of manhood. - The middle ages were a time of feuding

kingdoms and barbaric invasions, a time when most men were raised as

violent warriors. Knighthood provided a vision for men that showed them

they were made for more than just battle. They were also capable of

championing the cause of the poor, the women, and of the faith.

2. It defined a code of conduct. - Knights followed a rule often known as the

Code of Chivalry. This code shaped a man's behavior and channeled his

strength and gifts for the benefit of others. It taught a knight to live with

honor and to perform his duties towards his king, women, and his faith.

3. It gave man a worthy cause to fight for. - Knights often took on a cause that

went beyond their own interests. A famous example are the warrior monks

known as the Knights Templar who aided pilgrims to the Holy Land. The

Knights Hospitalier were know to care for the sick. The Knights of the Order

of St. Lazarus took care of lepers.

• This weekend, we will explore the elements that make a modern day knight.

We will talk about the vision for manhood, our code of conduct, and our

transcendent cause.

III. Raising Modern-Day Knights in SFC

Raising modern day knights is not an impossible concept. Consider the similarities we

already have in community with that of the process of knighthood.

Knighthood CFC Community Life

At eight years old, a boy was sent to a nearby

castle and was was trained as a page. A son of

a knight or of a member of the aristocrat, he

In our community, a page can be likened to a

Kids for Christ (KFC) member. He begins to

interact with other members of community. He

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spent most of his time strengthening his body,

wrestling and riding horses. He learned how to

fight with a spear and a sword. He was taught

more civilized topics like reading and writing.

He also studied Latin and French. The lady of

the castle taught the page to sing and dance

and how to behave in the king’s court.

is taught how to pray by his older brothers and

sisters in YFC. He learns how to pray, sing,

dance, and worship before the King of Kings.

At the age of fifteen or sixteen, a boy became a

squire in service to a knight. His duties

included dressing the knight in the morning,

serving all of the knight’s meals, caring for the

knight’s horse, and cleaning the knight’s armor

and weapons. He followed the knight to

tournaments and assisted his lord on the

battlefield. A squire also prepared himself by

learning how to handle a sword and lance

while wearing forty pounds of armor and

riding a horse.

In our community, a squire can be likened to a

Youth For Christ (YFC) member. Still young in

their faith, he is mentored by his older brothers

in YFC and SFC. His foundation in prayer,

scripture and the sacraments are strengthened.

He learns about spiritual warfare as he begins

to serve in camps and retreats. He goes on his

first mission trip under the guidance of his

Couple Coordinator.

When he was about twenty years of age, a

squire could become a knight after proving

himself worthy. A lord would agree to knight

him in a dubbing ceremony. The night before

the ceremony, the squire would dress in a

white tunic and red robes. He would then fast

and pray all night for the purification of his

soul. The chaplain would bless the future

knight's sword and then lay it on the chapel or

church's altar. Before dawn, he took a bath to

show that he was pure, and he dressed in his

best clothes. When dawn came, the priest

would hear the young man's confession, a

Catholic contrition rite. The squire would then

eat breakfast. Soon the dubbing ceremony

began. The outdoor ceremony took place in

front of family, friends, and nobility. The

squire knelt in front of the lord, who tapped

the squire lightly on each shoulder with his

sword and proclaimed him a knight. This was

symbolic of what occurred in earlier times. In

the earlier middle ages, the person doing the

A full fledged knight can be likened to a

Singles For Christ (SFC) brother. He undergoes

a longer formation process through the CLP.

Being a single professional, he is independent

and is mostly mobile. He uses his time and

resources to serve God and his SFC brethren.

He is respectful and protective towards his SFC

sisters. He takes on leadership and goes on

mission. He takes up the cause of building the

church of the home and the church of the poor.

He brings other singles to Christ.

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dubbing would actually hit the squire

forcefully, knocking him over. After the

dubbing, a great feast followed with music and

dancing. *

IV. Do You Have What It Takes To Be A Man?

A. What are the obstacles to becoming a modern day knight?

1. Our comfort – We can become too complacent and comfortable in our routine

that we are not interested in pursuing growth and development of our values,

morals, and principles. If we are to be real men, we should not be afraid of the

challenge to rise up and become even more holy and dedicated to the Lord.

2. Our tendencies – We may feel unworthy of the call to become knights for God

because we know we will only fail due to our weakness. However this is exactly

why we should become knights in the first place! All men are weak and the path

to knighthood will help us overcome these weaknesses. By admitting we are

weak, He will become our strength. (Read 2 Corinthians 13:9)

3. Our unwillingness – We may find ourselves simply unwilling to embrace this

call. Our pride in our achievements in serving God could blind us from realizing

that we are in need of constant transformation by Christ. We must be open to the

ways on how God can continually fashion us to be real men.

B. Attitudes we must take on

1. Humility – God doesn’t seek those who think they are something in the eyes of

the world. He seeks out the lowly – just as He did when Jesus picked out his 12

disciples. Come as you are. Let God have his way with what you can offer at this

time.

2. Obedient – The path to knighthood is a path of obedience to God and his Word.

Obedience is a tool that God uses to fashion us to become the man we were

meant to be.

3. Available – When God calls us, we must be available to heed Him. We must be

ready to detach ourselves from this world lest we suffer the same fate of the rich

young man who failed to follow Christ because he was concerned about his

possessions (Luke 18:18-25).

V. Conclusion

The world is in a crisis due to the absence of real men. The consequences are tragic –

from dysfunctional dads to power-hungry presidents, men have lost their true purpose.

The world has defined what manhood means. We need to unlearn all these standards

and turn to Christ as the real definition of manhood. We must look at the model of

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knighthood as a means to not only live out the Christian ideals but as a step to imitating

Christ. Taking on the call of being knights for God will help us to transform into the man

that God intends us to be.

VI. Questions for Discussion

1. Growing up, who were the manly influences in my life?

2. What did these men teach me about manhood?

3. What do I think are the qualities of an authentic man?

4. What has my father taught me about manhood?

5. What qualities of a knight do I want to live out in my life?

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Session 2: A Vision of Manhood

Objectives:

1. Highlight the core desires of man and relate how these affect him up to this day.

2. Define what authentic manhood is for SFC Brothers and inspire them to aim for

this.

3. Guide the brothers to reflect on and assess their personal state of “manhood”.

Key Messages:

1. Every man has three core desires in his heart which image God’s own desires for

man.

2. There are four principles that characterize authentic manhood and determines

what makes a real man (i.e., rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads

courageously, and expects greater reward).

Tenor:

Straightforward and frank, open.


A brother who can encourage the brothers to reflect and be open about their manhood. One

who can ground the concepts discussed through examples and real-life situations.

Activity: The scenes from the movies below are defining moments for the characters in the

story. Prepare video excerpts of these famous movies and ask the participants to guess which

movie these are taken from. As an alternative, scenes can be re-enacted via short skit or

play.

Chronicles of Narnia

Lucy Pevensie: Is he—quite safe?”

Mr. Beaver: “Safe? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the

King, I tell you.

Karate Kid

Mr. Kesuke Miyagi: In Okinawa, belt mean no need rope to hold up pants. [laughs; then,

seriously] Daniel-san, karate here. [taps his head] Karate here. [taps his heart] Karate never here.

[points to his belt] Understand?

Braveheart

Argyle Wallace: First, learn to use [taps William's forehead] this.

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Argyle Wallace: Then I'll teach you to use [lifts the sword] this.

Star Wars Episode VI

Darth Vader: The Force is strong with this one.

Gladiator

Marcus Aurelius: I want you to become protector of Rome after I die. I will empower you to

one end alone, to give power back to the people of Rome and end the corruption that has

crippled it. Do you accept this great honour I have offered you?

Maximus: With all my heart, no.

Marcus Aurelius: Maximus, that is why it must be you.

Lord of the Rings: Return of The King

Elrond: The man who can wield the power of this sword can summon to him an army more

deadly than any that walks this earth. Put aside the ranger. Become who you were born to be.

Briefly discuss the common points of these movies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I. The Man Behind The Armor

The strength of a knight does not lie solely on his armor or weapons. Neither does it lie

on his skill or his wit. His true stength lies in his identity - knowing who he is, whom he

represents, and the values that lie deep within his heart. As we begin our journey into

modern day knighthood, we must first discover who we are as men of God.

II. Strength from Within

A man has three core desires that are deep within his heart. These three desires image

God’s own desires for man and in this way man becomes an image of God in the world.

Being aware of these desires in our hearts and turning to God before anything and

anyone else to fulfill them, gives a man his inner strength.

A. A Desire to Love

• God is love (1 John 4:8) and He loves with a self-giving love. The ultimate sign

of this is Jesus’ offering of His life for us, to redeem us and give us the promise of

eternal life. There really is no greater love than this.

• Just as Christ gives Himself in love to His Bride the Church, a man’s heart is also

called to give himself selflessly in love to woman.

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o If a man truly loves a woman, he sees her as a beautiful creature of God,

worthy of his respect, adoration, and selfless love. He will put her needs

above His own and look after her welfare.

o In loving in this way, we mirror God’s image and likeness.

• God designed man’s heart to love to so as to draw him to Himself. Only God

can be the Source of this self-giving love, and only in union with Him can man

love in this way. Thus, man will always long to be with God, whether he is

aware of it or not. St. Agustine expresses this truth in his Confessions: “You

have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in

you.”

B. A Desire for Adventure

• Looking at creation, we cannot help but marvel at its beauty. God made it that

way so it reveals to man his wisdom, splendor, and love. Creation itself was a

means to draw man closer to God.

• God placed man in charge of creation (Genesis 1:28-30) and gave him

stewardship over it (Genesis 2:15).

• Because of this stewardship, a man’s heart will always long for a purpose for

living. His heart will seek an adventure because he wants to discover who he is

and what he is meant to be.

• When a man discovers his gifts and talents, his vocation becomes clear to him.

And living out this vocation is what gives man great joy and fulfillment.

Whether he be exploring the wilderness, building a bridge, inventing a cure for a

disease, painting a masterpiece, raising a family or celebrating Mass, his purpose

is his life’s adventure.

• No adventure, however, is without risk. As a man pursues his vocation, he takes

the risk of failure, of rejection, of difficult challenges that need to be hurdled. But

in persisting and conquering these risks when he knows that this is where God

calls him to be, a man reflects God’s own desire to love us His children, even if it

involved the risk of being rejected and denied by them.

• Like Christ who came to fulfill the purpose for which He was sent by the Father,

a man longs to accomplish his mission in the world. In the end, he realizes that

this is his ultimate adventure and that it can only be fulfilled if he has a

meaningful relationship with God who gave Him this purpose.

C. A Desire to Do Battle

• A true lover fights for the good and well-being of his beloved.

• In Exodus 15:3 Moses says, “The Lord is a warrior, and Lord is his name!” God

fought to liberate the Israelites from slavery from the hands of Pharaoh.

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• Christ was willing to do battle with sin and Satan. He was not afraid to shed his

blood for us - His Bride the Church.

• Similarly, a man’s heart is courageous and strong, ready to engage in battle. He

is willing to sacrifice himself for the sake of his beloved.

• Meekness means strength under control. A real man knows how to use his

strength properly in the service and welfare of others.

• In his courageous and meek heart ready to fight for his beloved and for causes he

believes in, man images God our Warrior and Liberator.

III. Four Principles of Manhood

Robert Lewis proposes 4 principles that characterize authentic manhood:

A. A Real Man Rejects Passivity

• According to sociologist Stephen B. Clark "Men have a natural tendency to avod

social responsibility." Because of our fallen nature, we tend to shy away from

obligation and just hide in our man-caves.

o Look at the brothers in SFC. How many of you avoided your leader

because you knew they were going to ask you to serve as a household

head or give a talk?

o Cite other examples that show passivity among SFC brothers or men in general.

• A real man is not passive! Christ shows us that true manliness means loving first!

"It was not you who chose me, but I chose you" (John 10).

• In a relationship, it is a man who pursues the woman, not the other way around.

The knights are the first to charge in the battlefield to draw first blood. We

should reject passivity!

• Being passive negates man’s three core desires for one cannot love, live an

adventure, and fight a battle passively. Thus, if he is to fulfill his core desires, he

must reject his passivity.

B. A Real Man Accepts Responsibility

• A real man takes it upon himself to respond to the needs of others around him.

He is response-able. He does not pass the blame on to others.

o How many men do we know are irresponsible? It is frustrating and

shameful to see grown men, capable of employment, but choosing to live

with their parents for no other reason than comfort.

o 2 Thes 3:10 says "if anyone was unwilling to work, neither should that

one eat."

o Or how about the single man who gets his girl pregnant but refuses the

responsibility of raising a child? He will even encourage his girlfriend to

get an abortion. (Cite other relevant examples.)

• A real man will not run away from his responsibility and will even hold himself

responsible for the welfare of others.

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• A man needs to take responsibility if he is to fulfill his core desires. Loving,

living out one’s vocation (adventure), and fighting a battle all require that a man

accept and take responsibility.

C. A Real Man Leads Courageously

• St. Paul writes "But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every

man, and the man is the head of a woman." Men were created to lead by God.

• Leadership does not mean dictatorship. But true servant-leadership as Jesus

exemplifies should be the standard of every man. Whils St. Paul states the

headship of a husband over his wife, it also means that the husband is a servant

to his wife, ready to shed his blood for her welfare.

• A leader cannot be passive and irresponsible. Leadership requires vision. That is

why men in general have a broader, macro perspective as compared to women.

This allows us to survey the situation and lead others through the path.

• But leadership without courage is impotent. Leadership is naturally opposed by

challenges of any given task. Wimpy men make poor leaders because they easily

crumble under pressure. Even when wounded, a knight presses on to battle to

lead his troops.

D. A Real Man Expects The Greater Reward

• In today's world where almost every desire is met with an "instant" solution (e.g.

instant coffee, instant soup, instant information [google], instant sex

[prostitution], etc.), expecting the greater, long term benefits and reward is a

challenge.

• Not everything in life can be obtained in an instant. A real man perseveres and

has faith in things that will give him true satsifaction in the long run.

• A real man is not impatient nor impulsive. He knows how to wait and he is

patient. He does not give up easily. He is like a farmer, toiling and tilling the soil

till the seeds that he plants bear fruit.

• Heaven is the greater good that we all aspire for. "What eye has not seen, and ear

has not heard, and what has not entered the human heart, God has prepared for

those who love him," (1 Cor 2:9).

• For a man to fulfill his core desires, he needs to persevere and keep his eyes

focused on the greater reward (heaven), which is the reason for his loving, living,

and fighting a battle.

IV. Conclusion

Brothers, our first step in our journey to knighthood is to embrace the definition of

authentic manhood. We must first understand the deep desires that God placed in the

heart of a man: a desire to love, for adventure, and for battle. We must judge ourselves

by the standards of authentic manhood according to the 4 principles. This is something

we need to reckon with in our hearts today.

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Activity

A. Defining moment

[prepare a separate worksheet for each participant]

• Find a place where you can be alone for reflection.

• Pray before you reflect.

"Lord Jesus, I am a man created in the image and likeness of God. Thank You for creating me

as a man for with it you have etched in my heart, my body, and my soul a deep mystery that

reveals who you are to others. Help me to dive deeper and discover within my heart your

design so that I may embrace it. Help me to fix my eyes on You, Jesus, that You may guide

me to the path of authentic manhood. Amen"

• Reflect on the following questions. Create a journal of your reflections.

• Who or what do you love so deeply?

• If time, money, and resources were not an issue, what is the greatest adventure

that you dream of pursuing?

• Who or what are you willing to fight for? How much would you give for this

cause?

B. Rate yourself

On a scale of 1 to 10 (1 meaning least likely true, 10 meaning most likely true), rate

yourself against these 4 principles of manhood:

I reject passivity

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 10

I accept responsibility

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 10

I lead courageously

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 10

I expect (and can wait) for the greater reward

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 10

Look at your answers. Why are they not a 10? What would it take for you to get a 10 in

all these 4 principles?

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Session 3: A Code of Conduct

Objectives:

1. Highlight God’s desired code of conduct for man.

2. Recall how man through Adam broke the code with God.

3. Give hope through God’s promise for redemption.

4. Encourage the brothers to seek healing from their brokenness.

Key Messages:

1. Man’s adherence to God’s desired code of conduct (a will to obey, a work to fulfill, a

woman to love) will lead him to a full and satisfying life.

2. Although the code of conduct was broken initially through Adam and inherited by

man, Jesus, the New Adam, redeemed man by fulfilling the code of conduct.

3. Man must continue to seek redemption through constant turning away from sin.

Tenor:

Serious and reflective, leading to the desire to seek healing from the Lord


A brother who can encourage the participants to acknowledge their brokenness and lead them

in seeking healing from the Lord. One who is emotionally and spiritually strong and prayerful.

I. A Knight's Code of Conduct

During the dark and often chaotic middle ages, the knight stood out among the other

warriors of his time. What set him apart was his code of conduct. He was more than just an

elite soldier in the kingdom, he was also champion of virtue. This was brought about by his

training as first a page, then as a squire, by men who lived out these high ethical and moral

standards. The four main values of his code of conduct are:

• Loyalty - According to Barbara Tuchman, "Loyalty, meaning the pledged word, was

chivalry's fulcrum...A knight who broke his oath was charged with 'treason' for

betraying the order of knighthood"

• Excellence - A knight was to conduct himself like a champion on the battlefield as well

as in the king's court.

• Love and Honor of Women - A knight was to be romantic and chivalrous. He treated

women with respect and would fight for their honor.

• Generosity to the Poor - Gorges Duby says "The knight owes it to himself to keep

nothing in his hands. All that comes to him he gives away."

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Today, we live in a society where the moral and ethical standards can be likened to that

of a medieval age. We need modern day Christian knights to be a light and witness in

these dark and chaotic times.

II. God's Code of Conduct for Men

A "code" means a set of rules and standards adhered to by society or individuals. God gave

man fundamental codes of conduct to live by. If he adheres to these standards, he will find a

life that is satisfying and full. Robert Lewis outlines these as as will to obey, a work to fulfill,

and a woman to love.

A. A Will to obey

• God is man's creator (Gen 1:26-28). Our obedience to him is a response of faith, hope,

and love.

• God made known his will to man. To Adam, he commanded that he take on

stewardship of creation. He gave to Moses the 10 commandments which men must

obey if they are to be God's people.

• Jesus gave us the Beatitudes and taught us many other standards by which we ought

to live our life in obedience to God.

B. A Work to fulfill

• God did not just create man to passively enjoy what creation had to offer. He gave

him a duty - a work to fulfill. Work was a means for man to utilize the gifts and

talents God gave him as part of his stewardship of creation. Work was also a means

for man to provie for himself, and an activity where he can find fulfillment and joy.

• Adam was given a specific work to fulfill - to till and keep the garden. "The Lord

God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to till it and keep it." (Gen

2:15)

• Scripture teaches us that work is a blessing from God. "So my conclusion is this: true

happiness lies in eating and drinking and enjoying whatever has been achieved

under the sun, throughout the life given by God: for this is the lot of humanity. And

whenever God gives someone riches and property with the ability to enjoy them and

to find contentment in work, this is a gift from God. For such a person will hardly

notice the passing of time, so long as God keeps his heart occupied with joy."

(Ecclesiastes 5:17-19)

• St. Paul writes about the value of work "If anyone was unwilling to work, neither

should that one eat." (2 Thes 3:10).

C. A Woman to love

• "The LORD God said: "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a suitable

partner for him." (Gen 2:18). We then further read that God formed other creatures

but none proved to be a suitable partner for man.

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• God then creates woman from man's rib. He exclaims "This one, at last, is bone of my

bones and flesh of my flesh; This one shall be called 'woman,' for out of 'her man'

this one has been taken." (Gen 2:23).

• A man is called to love a woman. Looking at a man's body, it does not make sense by

itself. But seen in the light of a woman's body, together they make perfect sense. Man

was made for woman and woman for man.

• A man must have a woman to love. A single man is called to love his mother and his

sisters. A husband devotes his life to love, lead, and honor his wife. A man called to

priesthood devotes his life to love, lead, and honor the bride of Christ - the Church.

• Ephesians 5 describes the standard for which a man must love his woman. He must

be willing to give up his life for her. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also

loved the church and gave Himself up for her" (Eph 5:25).

III. A Broken Code and the Promise of Redemption

A. Adam’s failure and its consequences

The first man had the opportunity to live out this code of conduct. Adam was given a

will to obey God, a work to fulfill in the garden, and a woman to love, Eve. But

something went terribly wrong. In his book "First Comes Love", author Scott Hahn

breaks down for us the events in Genesis.

• After God creates man, he gives Adam his commandment. And the Lord God planted a

garden in Eden, in the east; and there He put the man whom He had formed. And out of the

ground the Lord God made to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food,

the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the treee of the knowledge of good and evil.

.. The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to till it and keep it. And

the Lord God commanded the man, saying, "You may freely eat of every tree of the garden;

but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat

of it you shall die."(Gen 2:8-9, 15-17). Important details in the passage:

o "to keep" in Hebrew literally means "to guard" as the Israelite priests guarded

the sanctuary and kept it from defilement. God's command implied that there

was something that must be kept out, something that might try to get in.

o "you shall die" appears in some translations to mean "you shall die the death".

Ancient rabbis taught this passage from Genesis implied two kinds of death -

a natural death, and a supernatural death. This verse referred to the latter, a

most extreme kind of death - a death of a soul.

• Now the serpent was more subtle than any other wild creature that the Lord God had made.

He said to the woman, "Did God say, 'You shall not eat of the any tree of the garden'?" And

the woman said to the serpent, "We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden; but God

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said, 'You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, neither shall

you touch it, lest you die.'" But the serpent said to the woman, "You will not die. For God

knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened , and you will be like God, knowing

good and evil."

a. "the serpent" is not your small garden variety snake. The Old Testament

translation of "serpent" is "nahash" denoting a dragon (Is 27:1) or a sea

monster (Job 26:13). The Catechism of the Catholic Church identifies the

serpent as Satan (CCC 291) who can physically harm Adam.

b. "He said.." The serpent was addressing both of them, not just Eve. Original

Hebrew translation indicate the serpent speaks not to one person but to the

couple.

c. "And the woman said.." Who responds to the serpent? Only Eve. Where was

the man tasked by God to till and keep/guard the garden? He is silent and

allows his wife to succumb to the serpent's proposal. Why did he not

intervene?

d. The serpent said "You will not die". Being a murderous beast, he was

implying that they would die if they refused to eat the fruit. In other words,

the serpent threatened to kill them if they did not comply to his proposal.

e. Adam feared his own death. Moreover, he feared his physical death at the

hand of the serpent, more than the spiritual death that awaited him if he

offended God by sin.

f. Adam had a choice to respond to this threat by intervening or calling out to

God for help. His fears threw him back, to pride, upon himself. It kept him

from his duty to guard the garden. His fears overcame his ability to trust his

Father God to rescue him, even if he loses his life in doing battle with the

serpent. His fears kept him from defending his wife.

• So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes,

and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate and she also

gave some to her husband, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that

they were naked and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves aprons. (Gen 3:1-7)

a. Because Adam failed to fulfill his work «to till and keep», the serpent was

able to enter the garden.

b. Crippled with the fear, he choose not to intervene when the serpent

addressed the couple. Because of his silence, Eve stepped in and was

tempted. He failed to love the woman God gave to be his companion.

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c. In the end, Adam failed to obey the will of God. He trusted his own

judgment instead of relying on God's power. His pride became his downfall

and the consequences were borne by the rest of mankind.

d. Therefore, just as through one person sin entered the world, and through sin, death,

and thus death came to all (Rom 5:12)

e. Failing to live out our basic code of conduct as a man will have its

consequences too in our daily lives.

B. Christ’s victory and promise of redemption

For since death came through a human being, the resurrection of the dead came also through a

human being. For just as in Adam all die, so too in Christ shall all be brought to life. (1 Cor 15:

21-22)

Despite Adam's failure, God still loved us. He sent his own son, Jesus Christ to redeem

us and save us. And the way Christ did it was to become man Himself. (Philippians 2).

Unlike Adam, Jesus fulfills the code of conduct that God gave to man.

• Jesus was obedient to the will of the Father

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. (Matt 4:1)

o Just as Adam was tempted by Satan in the garden, Jesus was also tempted in

the desert.

o Satan's objective was to undermine the relationship of Jesus from the Father

by offering Him power and pleasure. He sought to have Jesus disobey God.

o Jesus rebukes Satan and remains faithful to the Father.

He advanced a little and fell prostrate in prayer, saying, "My Father, if it is possible, let this

cup pass from me; yet, not as I will, but as you will. (Matthew 26:39)

o Jesus, also at the garden, remains faithful to his Father's will despite the fear

of physical death that awaited him.

o Adam cowered in fear in the garden and chose to save his life by disobeying

God. Because of that, he eventually died and brought death upon mankind.

o Because of Jesus' obedience even to death on the cross, He is risen from death

on the third day.

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• Jesus fulfilled the work his Father gave him

When John heard in prison of the works of the Messiah, he sent his disciples to him the blind

regain their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and

the poor have the good news proclaimed to them. with this question, "Are you the one who is

to come, or should we look for another?" Jesus said to them in reply, "Go and tell John what

you hear and see: the blind regain their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear,

the dead are raised, and the poor have the good news proclaimed to them. (Matt 11:2-5)

o Jesus fulfills his mission (Luke 4:16) on earth and remains faithful to the end.

o Jesus drives away many demons from the possessed (Mark 5:9). He never

gave Satan a foothold during his ministry unlike Adam who failed to till and

keep the garden, allowing the serpent to slip past him.

o An interesting scene in the movie the Passion of the Christ shows Jesus during

the agony in the garden, stepping on and crushing the head of the snake.

• Jesus loved the women in his life

Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother's sister, Mary the wife of

Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he

loved, he said to his mother, "Woman, behold, your son." Then he said to the disciple,

"Behold, your mother." And from that hour the disciple took her into his home. (John 19:25-

27)

o Adam was passive in the garden and did not take Satan's threat to the couple

head on.

o Jesus response however was to take Satan head on by offering his life for the

sake of his beloved - his bride the Church

o In the garden, Adam lets Eve respond. On Calvary, Jesus responds and Mary

stays silent. Jesus entrusts his beloved mother to the care of John the apostle.

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for her.

(Eph 5:25)

o Jesus, the bridegroom, sheds his blood for his bride, the Church.

o This ought to be our model! True love is nothing without SACRIFICE!

If we are to become true men, we must go through the cross.We must die to ourselves and

rise anew in Christ. (Gal 2:20). This is the only way we can break away from and will

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overcome the weaknesses we inherited from Adam, the first man, and live in victory with

Christ, the new Adam.

IV. The path to redemption

Brothers, let us not waste any more time rationalizing our sin. We still bear a strong

semblance to Adam, the first man. We are weak and our desires are disordered. But there is

hope! Christ has come as the new Adam, redeeming us, but also showing us men the way to

authentic manhood! We must be transformed! The path we must take are the following:

• Repentance – We need to be honest with ourselves and stop rationalizing our sins. Even

while our desires may be corrupted, we still CHOSE to indulge them instead of resisting

sin. We must seek God’s forgiveness and ask for the grace to be strong.

• Deliverance – “For freedom Christ set us free; so stand firm and do not submit again to

the yoke of slavery.” (Gal 5:1).

o God can forgive our sins if we repent. But the effects of sin remains: hurts, pains,

and tendency to sin. We must ask Christ to heal us from the effects of sin and to

deliver us from any vice or addictions we have nurtured in the past.

o We must seek the power of the Holy Spirit so that we may “live by the Spirit”

(Gal 5:24-25) and not live according to the desires of our flesh. Surrender, faith,

and humility are the key to deliverance.

• Allegiance – We need to re-commit ourselves to Christ as our Lord and King. Our

submission to Christ is essential else we will find ourselves submitting to our own will

and desires.

o We must commit to fight the good fight or persevering and continuing to

struggle amidst temptations, which will always be there because of our

concupiscence.

• Compliance – We need to grow in discipleship and formation so we can fortify our

resolve to live a holy and righteous life. Just as David prayed “Blessed be the Lord my

rock, who trains my hands for battle, my fingers for war.” (Psalm 144:1), we need to re-

learn the ways of true manhood by living a life of virtue. This helps us also to continue

to fight the good fight.

Brothers, are you ready to die? To die to yourself so that you may rise again with Christ?

let us then begin our time of healing and restoration.

• Healing session

[Sacrament of Reconciliation - If a priest is available for Confession, now would be the best

time to encourage the brothers to do so. You can do the following guided prayer as an

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examination of conscience for the brothers prior to confession.]

Guided Prayers

Lead the brothers in prayer using only slow songs of worship and adoration, singing in the

Spirit. Invite the Holy Spirit to come and open our hearts to His presence. Have the music

ministry continue to play soft melody of worship as the following session begins:

Have the brothers close their eyes and answer the following questions in prayer. Allow

enough time of silence for this.

• Do I struggle with sexual desires? Do I indulge in pornography, masturbation, pre-

marital sex?

• Am I addicted to gambling, vice, and other risky behaviour?

• Have I been violent towards others? Have I used my strength to abuse, coerce, and

intimidate others?

• Am I hurting because of the failures of my father to love me and raise me up to be a

good man?

• Have any of my male family members or relatives abused me or failed to witness to me

the true meaning of manhood?

• Has anyone outside my family, figures of authority (teachers, superiors, etc) abused me

or failed to witness to me the true meaning of manhood?

• Have I failed to live out to the fullest the true meaning of manhood? Have I hurt or

abused anyone in the process?

Lead the brothers to continue praying to the Lord while waiting for the others to finish with

their confession. After everyone has confessed, lead the brothers in praying the Wounded

Knight’s Prayer. Pause frequently as the brothers follow silently.

“A WOUNDED KNIGHT’S PRAYER”

Heavenly Father, I am a Knight. You have created me in your image and

likeness out of your love for me. I am your son and You have bestowed upon

me the rights of an heir to your heavenly Kingdom.

I let you down my Father. I am deeply wounded. Not from the battles in the

field, but wounded from the battles from within.

I have failed You miserably. I have sinned and continue to sin. I have chosen

my human desires over and above what Your divine will is for me. I have

turned my back on what is genuine and true and contented myself with the

counterfeits of this life. I gave up eternal joy and bliss to be with You and

instead feasted over temporary pleasure. I chose this world over my place

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deep in Your heart.

I ask for forgiveness.

I have struggled with purity. I have succumbed to the temptations of

the flesh, indulged in pornography, premarital sex, and masturbation. I

have been addicted to drugs, to alcohol, to materialism, and to power. I

have physically and sexually abused other people. I have used power to

intimidate and to coerce. I have lived a double life.

I know that I am not worthy. I humbly implore Your Divine Mercy to have

pity on me. Make me worthy once again. Make me realize what Your

original plan for me is. Make me realize that my heart was made for love,

for adventure, and for a battle. Make we realize that it is the devil who has

distorted what I am and corrupted my heart and distorted my desires.

I ask for Your healing.

My hurt is deeply-rooted. I do not know anymore who or what caused my

hurt. What I do know is that I still hurt deep inside even.

Was it my father who physically hurt me as a child? Was it the verbal abuse I

was subjected to at home and in school? Was it the violation of my body by

people who were supposed to protect me? Was it the effects of the drugs

and alcohol I took to make me forget? Was it the love I offered to this girl

which was scorned and ridiculed? Was it the absence of anybody who could

have comforted me when I was alone in my life?

All these years, I have kept these pains inside me. I have learned to numb

my senses and to hide these feelings, putting up a false façade of strength.

Deep inside I long for Your love, my Father. Heal me. Cover me with Your

love.

I ask for Your deliverance.

I have sinned but You can heal me. I have fallen but You can help me up. I

have been lost but You can find me. I have given up but You have not given

up on me.

Be with me in the battles I will never win alone. Free me from the bondage of

sin which slowly consumes me. Allow me to move on inspite of all the hurts

I have been through. Lead me Lord into Your arms. Do not let me succumb

to temptation once again. Show me the light to salvation.

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Heavenly Father, send forth your Most Holy Spirit to be my guide.

Thank you, dear Father, for hearing the plea of Your son. I am a wounded

Knight but I choose to ask for forgiveness in order to be healed. Thank you

for your grace to forgive and to heal. Thank you for never failing to listen to

the call of Your child. But most of all, thank you for just being our Father.

Amen.

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Session 4: A Cause to Fight For

Objectives:

1. Instill in the SFC brother the transcendent cause he must embrace as his own.

2. Exhort the SFC brothers to uphold the values of the SFC Knight.

3. Solicit the brothers’ commitment to live out the life of a true SFC Knight.

Key Messages:

1. The cause of the SFC brother should transcend beyond his personal cause.

2. The SFC brother is called to uphold the values of integrity, initiative, humility,

excellence, courage, faith, and servant leadership.

3. SFC brothers are called to be the modern knights ready to fight the battle and must be

ready to commit to the duty of knighthood.

Tenor:

Exciting, exhorting, victorious.


A brother who can challenge the SFC brothers to commit to become a knight and live out the

corresponding life. One who can inspire. Ideally, the highest SFC brother leader of the area

The Tale of St. George and the Dragon

According to a legend, St. George was a knight who traveled the countryside. He came upon a

town that was besieged by a dragon. The townsfolk drew lots to determine who among the

maidens were to be offered to the dragon to appease it. The lot fell on the princess and the king

begged St. George to help. The gallant knight made a sign of the cross, then proceeded to slay

the dragon with his lance. He rescues the princess and brings her back to his father, the king.

Just as St. George took up the cause to slay the dragon, we too as God’s sons need to take up the

cause of living like knights in this day and age.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I. The Cause of A Modern Day Knight

A knight does not live for himself. He takes up the cause of his King and offers his services,

even his life, to fulfill this cause. It is also true for every man. There's a purpose behind our

masculinity, our strength, and abilities.

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A. Life without a Cause

• Secular manhood judges a man by his position (e.g. "I'm a lawyer", "I'm a doctor"),

by his ability to "out-play" and win over others (e.g. competitiveness, strategic

planner), how many goals he's achieved in his professional or political career (e.g.

made it to CEO, elected as Senator), or how he enjoys his personal wealth and

affluence (e.g. big house, luxurious life).

• There is nothing wrong with pursuing these standards and being successful. But the

problem with making these standards our goals for living makes our life incomplete.

King Solomon, one of the most powerful and wisest man who ever lived, has

something to say about this matter:

"I undertook great works; I built myself houses and planted vineyards; I made gardens and

parks, and set out in them fruit trees of all sorts. And I constructed for myself reservoirs to

water a flourishing woodland. I acquired male and female slaves, and slaves were born in my

house. I also had growing herds of cattle and flocks of sheep, more than all who had been

before me in Jerusalem. I amassed for myself silver and gold, and the wealth of kings and

provinces. I got for myself male and female singers and all human luxuries.

I became great, and I stored up more than all others before me in Jerusalem; my wisdom, too,

stayed with me. Nothing that my eyes desired did I deny them, nor did I deprive myself of

any joy, but my heart rejoiced in the fruit of all my toil. This was my share for all my toil.

But when I turned to all the works that my hands had wrought, and to the toil at

which I had taken such pains, behold! all was vanity and a chase after wind, with

nothing gained under the sun. (Ecc 2:4-11)

• Pursuing success is not what life is all about. Man needs to find meaning and

purpose for his life. He needs to know, at the end of his life, that his life meant

something for others. He wants to know that his life was not in vain, but he made a

difference in the lives of others. What is missing is a transcendent cause.

B. What is a Transcendent Cause?

A meaningful cause is a mission that a man undertakes that adds value to the life of

others. This mission transcends time and location, it stretches beyond borders and

generations. According to author Robert Lewis, a transcendent cause must have these

following characteristics:

• Heroic - a noble endeavor calling forth bravery and sacrifice.

• Timeless - it contains significance beyond the moment.

• Meaningful - it is supremely filled with meaning and value for others

In SFC, there are two transcendent causes we can embrace as our own.

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• Building the Church of the Home - God calls us to build up and strengthen the

family against the evil forces that seek to undermine it. It starts with personal

renewal, then the renewal of marriages and families. Our basic call to evangelize and

bring others to Christ is our foremost mission. If we remain faithful to this cause, we

will fulfill our SFC vision, that every single man and woman all over the world will

experience Christ.

• Building the Church of the Poor - God calls us to evangelize but also to look after

the welfare of the poor. Through ANCOP, we are able to help the poor by giving a

child the gift of education, building homes for the homeless, and creating

communities of hope.

Now its not enough that we embrace a particular cause. We must also uphold within us

values that will hone and channel our masculine strength as we pursue our mission.

II. The 7 values of an SFC Knight

These are the top seven values that each SFC brother must pledge to uphold.

• Integrity - Our words and actions are one. We are active witnesses of our faith

o Practice what we preach.

o Never allow your name to be tarnished by scandalous behavior or affairs.

o You keep your word and your promise. No lip-service.

• Initiative - We reject passivity. We don't wait for others to move but we initiate first.

o If you see a need, be the first ones to respond.

o When your leader asks you to serve, say YES! Mission readiness is a prerequisite

of initiative.

o In courtship, you do not keep the lady waiting. Initiate by expressing your

intention and feelings first after your discernment.

• Humility - We regard others as more important without belittling our own worth and

abilities.

o Never boast about your abilities or achievements. Accord everything to God who

provided you with all these.

o Take on Christ as your model, who, though he was God, emptied himself and

took the form of man (Phil 2)

• Excellence - We strive to excel in our professional and personal lives and reject

mediocrity

a. We do the ordinary things extraordinarily well

b. Be thorough and diligent when you carry out your tasks

c. Always give your 100% to everything.

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• Courage - Despite our fears and weakness, we press on and stand up for what is right.

a. Do not buckle under pressure but learn to fix your eyes on Jesus

b. Do not give up easily but fight the good fight!

c. Brothers, encourage one another! There is strength in numbers.

• Faith - God is our primary source of power and we seek him daily for His grace.

o Without faith, it is impossible to please God.(Heb 11:6)

o Faith is trusting that God will MOVE. We surrender our will to His.

• Servant-Leadership - We lead courageously and use our leadership position to serve

others.

o Leadership brings us to a position to help many.

o Use your leadership to bring other men and women close to Christ.

o Your leadership is not your identity, but a privilege that can be removed and

given to others. Use it wisely.

III. The Order of SFC Knights

A knight does not live and fight alone. The legendary King Arthur had his Knights of the

Round Table. We too have our fraternal order of brotherhood and that is SFC. We need to be

committed to one another because we need each other to grow in our faith but also to grow

in our understanding of authentic masculinity.

A. Our Loyalty

Our loyalty to one another must be without question. We stick out for one another and

we defend each other. If there are disagreements among us, we must learn to work

things out in Christian brotherly love. Our love for Christ is what binds us together.

B. Our Commitment

We are committed to live out the true meaning of authentic manhood as defined by

Christ. We commit to love, honor, and build up one another. We are our brothers keeper

and we will teach, as well as admonish and correct, one another so that we can grow

even more in our faith and service to God. We will challenge one another to bring out

the excellence in our actions.

C. Our Patron

• We turn to Christ first and foremost, as the new Adam - the true model of authentic

manhood.

• We look to St. Joseph, the patron of the Church and all fathers that we may learn

what it means to live in humility, committed service, and love for Mary.

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• We look to St. George, the patron of soldiers. As modern day knights, we look to

him as our inspiration to be ready for battle, to defend our sisters from harm.

• We look to St. Benedict, the patron of learners and those who suffer from diseases.

We ask his intercession as we learn about the ways of true manhood. He is also an

exemplary model of holiness and spiritual warfare. St. Benedict's Cross/Medal is a

powerful sacramental that reminds whoever that wears it, of the power of God to

dispel Satan. (See http://www.osb.org/gen/medal.html for more information)

IV. Ceremony

• We have now come to the end our Men's Weekend One. We have seen how the model of

knighthood is relevant to our times and that we must become modern knights ourselves.

We are born into a battle. Satan, in the form of a serpent, waged war upon God’s

children in the garden when he tempted our first parents Adam and Eve to sin.

• This battle continues to rage. The book of Revelation illustrates the devil as a dragon

who “became angry with the woman and went off to wage war against the rest of her

offspring, those who keep God's commandments and bear witness to Jesus” (Rev 12:14)

• The enemy continues to lie to us. He does not want us to live up to our full potential. He

continues to distract men from their true call as God’s sons.

Let us now commit ourselves to the duty of knighthood in SFC.

A. Commitment Prayer

[Have the music ministry play a reflection song. Have the brothers take a knee and bow

their heads as you go through the prayers]

Lord Jesus, we humbly come to you today. We bear the weakness of Adam, the fist man.

Our perception of true manhood has been warped by the influences of the world. I ask

you today to renew my understanding of authentic manhood. Restore in my heart the

desire to love only you above all else. Reveal to me the purpose for which you have

created me, so that I may live life as an adventure, pursuing the mission you call me to

fulfill. Fill my heart with virtue and courage, that I may not be afraid to engage in battle

for what is right.

Teach me to become a true man for Christ. Help me to reject passivity, accept

responsibility, lead courageously, and seek the greater reward. Help to know your will

that I may obey it. Help me to value the work you have given me. And help me to love

the women in my life, my mother, sister, or girlfriend.

Jesus, I forgive the men in my life who have failed to witness true manhood. I forgive

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my father, my brothers, my teachers, my priest, and colleagues. If I have suffered any

abuse at the hands of men, I release them from my anger and bitterness but hand them

over to you. I ask the Holy Spirit to touch these painful moments in my life and pour out

waves upon waves of love and healing, that all hurts and wounds become submerged,

cleansed, and healed. I also forgive all the women in my life that have sought to

undermine my masculinity through their rejection or failure to love. I forgive my

mother, my sisters, friends, ex-girlfriends, and colleagues. I ask your forgiveness for my

selfish exploitation of women through prostitution, casual sex, pornography,

masturbation, and other illicit sexual activity.

Lord, hep me discover my gifts and talents that I may apply them to the cause you call

me to embrace. As an SFC member, help me to embrace the cause to build the Church of

the home, and build the Church of the poor. Help me to be a man of integrity, initiative,

and humility. May I be excellent in everything I do and be courageous in the face of evil

or danger. Grant me your grace to be humble and to be a true servant-leader to others.

I commit myself to the ideals of knighthood and the brotherhood of Christian knights in

SFC. I commit myself to my brothers in this room and they can always count on me to be

a source of healing, strength, encouragement, correction, and love.

B. Bestowing The Armor Of God and the Sword of The Spirit

Lord I need you to equip me as a knight that I may be effective in this spiritual battle

that I was born into. I now don the armor that St. Paul speaks about in Ephesians 6.

I put on the armor of God so that I may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the

devil. For our struggle is not with flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the

powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits in the

heavens. Therefore, I put on the armor of God, that I may be able to resist on the evil day

and, having done everything, to hold my ground.

I will stand fast with my loins girded in truth, clothed with righteousness as a

breastplate,

and my feet shod in readiness for the gospel of peace.

In all circumstances, I hold faith as a shield, to quench all (the) flaming arrows of the evil

one.

I take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

C. Intercession of Patron Saints and Bestowing of a Sacramental

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I ask for the blessing and intercession of St. Joseph that I may be true to my call as a

man and as a future father. May I imitate his love and devotion to our Blessed Mother

Mary and his humble service to the child Jesus.

I pray to St. George, that I may find courage to battle and slay my dragons, and to rescue

the captive women in my life from Satan's lies. May I be a champion of women and be a

source of affirmation and love.

I pray to St. Benedict, that I may forever be a diligent learner of the ways of Christ. May I

imitate his faith and become holy. For holiness is a potent weapon against spiritual

warfare.

[The Team Leader now calls the men by name one by one to the front. The brothers will

kneel before the leader as he bestows upon them the sacramental (e.g. St. Benedict's

cross). If there are many brothers that will be initiated, have a few leaders station

themselves in the room and perform the initiation.]

Leader: <Name of brother>, are you ready to commit yourself to pursue authentic

manhood as modeled by Christ?

Participant: I am.

Leader: Will you commit to the standards of modern day knighthood, pushing yourself

to be excellent in your personal and professional life, and upholding the values we share

in SFC?

Participant: I will.

Leader: <Name of brother>, I bestow upon you this sacramental <e.g. St. Benedict's

cross> so that it will be a solemn reminder of your promise today to become a modern

day knight for Jesus. You are hereby initiated in a deeper brotherhood in SFC. Go, and

be a champion of Christ.

Participant: Amen.

When all the brothers have been initiated, have the worship leader begin the exhortation

for the praisefest.

V. Conclusion and Exhortation of Worship Leader Leading to Praisefest

My brother knights, are we now ready?

SFC has been around for the past eighteen years. The phenomenon of the lack of SFC

brothers remains a reality not only in the Philippines, but around most parts of the world as

well. The situation is not unique to SFC as it involves the general nature of man wherever

he is. Are we now ready to bring back the brothers to SFC?

Man was made different from woman as God had his plan for man the same way He had

His plans for women. Man fell along the way, but God is willing to restore man to His

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original plan. But along the way, the evil one will continue to thwart God’s plan. Are we

ready to fight the battle?

As SFC brothers, we are called to be humble, courageous and men of integrity. We will

constantly be reminded of these traits with the SFC Brother’s crest. Are we ready to live out

these virtues?

Since we are in a battle, we need as many knights as we can. We need more of the special

breed of knights who have fought gallantly beyond the call of duty, at times forsaking the

needs of their families. These are our full time pastoral workers and mission volunteers.

May I ask these people to come up (on stage) with me? My brothers, notice how few these

men are compared to the battle we need to fight. We need more men like this. If you hear a

voice in you asking you to be a full time pastoral worker or a mission volunteer, please

come up. Are we ready to take our service to the next level and be a fulltime worker or a

mission volunteer?

We have taken this call to a new level by the knighting we all went through. Let us live the

lives of real knights, let us be the real SFC brothers!

Praisefest

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References Used.

Books

Evert, Jason. Theology of His Body. Westchester, PA: Ascension Press, 2009. Evert, Jason. Theology of Her Body. Westchester, PA: Ascension Press, 2009. Lewis, Robert. Raising A Modern-Day Knight. Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House, 2007. Eldredge, John Wild at Heart. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 2001. Eldredge, John and Stasi. Captivating. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 2005. Hahn, Scott. First Comes Love. New York: Double Day, 2002.

Websites

"Chivalry." Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc. January 15, 2001. <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chivalry> "Knighthood." Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc. January 15, 2001. <<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knighthood>

Scripture

Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible with Revised New Testament and Revised Psalms © 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C.

Documents

Men’s Weekend I: Knights Tales · CFC Singles for Christ Page 8 Men's Weekend 1: Knights Tales If we are to help men discover and live out authentic manhood, we must look at a model