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MAY M K , M I S S I O N A R Y A N D T H I R D - C U L T U R E A
D V O C A T E
2015
Some of you have asked what topics I cover when Im invited to
speak. Recently, its been about permissions! They have the power to
restore freedom to MKs who feel burdened by unachievable
expectations.
PERMISSION TO BE KIDS: Its no secret that missionaries children
feel held to higher standards than their peers. There is
unrelenting pressure for them to be good. Be polite. Be friendly.
And neverevercomplain.
When I was visiting with missionaries in Romania a few weeks
ago, I asked the 11-year old boy why his family had moved to
Romania. He told me that he was there to tell people about Jesus.
Perhaps the most meaningful words I heard on that three-week trip
were his mothers when she said, No, honey, mom and dad are here to
tell people about Jesus. Your job is to be a kid.
What a simply-worded, freedom-giving permission! Her son, a
relatively new MK, heard from his mothers own mouth that its okay
for him to just be young. So he can talk back or stomp his foot or
hate zucchini or complain or lie and expect consequencesbut without
the disproportionate shame too often levied on MKs who are just
being kids in the world of ministry.
The Freedom of Permission
MICHLES NEWS
Type to enter text
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PERMISSION TO DOUBT
Faith is not an inherited conviction. Not all MKs are saved. Not
all MKs believe that God is real. Not all MKs view their parents
faith in a positive light. God is not a transferable commodity. Yet
the pressure on MKs to not only believe, but be exemplary in their
faith is rampant. What unfair pressure we put on souls whose
perception of God has been complicated by a ministry-saturated
worldview.
Permission to doubt is more than mere processing-spaceits the
gift of honest grappling toward eternal outcomes. Parents need to
extend it. Communities need to extend it. Churches need to extend
it. Adults and peers need to celebrate it as part of Gods working
in the lives of MKs.
Permission to doubt is crucial to an authentic faith.
!!!!!
!PERMISSION TO FAIL
Demanding unreasonable exceptionality of MKs because their
family represents God sets them up for the worst kind of failure:
one in which their imperfection hurts their familys work and
tarnishes Gods image. So it isnt just a bad grade. It isnt just
getting cut from the soccer team. Its bringing shame on themselves,
on their families and on God.
Children will fail. Theyll do stupid things, theyll forget
instructions and theyll disobey rules. They need to know that
mistakes and bad behavior are not unforgivable flaws.
If were not careful with our words, we heap a spiritual burden
on six-year olds whose lives are already complicated by
cross-cultural living, frequent transitions and successive losses.
The liberating balm of permission to fail for young people who are
often overly self-blaming cannot be overstated.
!
Be shepherds of Gods flock that is under your care, watching
over them not because you must, but because you are willing, as God
wants you to be. I Peter 5:2
IN CASE YOU MISSED THESE!
A few articles on significant topics. To view them, go to:
www.michelephoenix.com
Then click blog and scroll down to the titles listed below.
MKs AND ISOLATION
Choosing not to need hurts.
FIVE PERMISSIONS MISSIONARIES NEED
Pressures that harm them.
TOP TEN PRACTICES FOR PARENTING MKs
Assumptions about singleness.
(With elementary kids at an MK school.)
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!Its no secret that the heaviest burden many MKs bear is the
number of goodbyes theyre forced to say in their early years. The
mission field is a transient place where someone is always leaving.
The repeated departures create an expectation of loss that colors
both their entry into new relationships and the nature of the
friendships they form.
Until missionary parents and the missionary community as a whole
give permission to missionaries children to express and work
through their griefas ugly as it may get we will continue to see
hearts hardened toward God (on whom many blame their losses) and
adult MKs still crippled by their goodbyes in later seasons of
their lives.
I BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF PRAYER!
Praise for a safe and profitable trip to MK schools in Spain and
Romania last month.
Praise for profound encounters with missionary parents and their
children in the past weeks.
Praise for the chance to present MK needs at a symposium of
Member Care workers in BC.
Praise for $80,000 raised for the Canadian MK Network at the
event where I spoke in April.
Praise for another symposium next week where Ill speak to
mission and church leaders.
Praise for the invitation to lead a session at Moody Bible
Institutes orientation in August.
Praise for people like you who pray and give and encourage and
upholdso grateful!
SERVING WITH GLOBAL OUTREACH MISSION
Mission: Global Outreach, PO Box 2010, Bualo, NY 14231-2010
Michle: 27W190 Emerson Court, Winfield, IL 60190
Email: [email protected] Phone: (331) 625 9030 !
PERMISSION TO GRIEVE
But waittheres more!
This is just a portion of my article on Permissions. The rest is
on my blog, part of my campaign to write about subjects weve too
often dismissed or ignored. (Another post tackles the permissions
adult missionaries need.) To
be notified when I add new articles, just email me (address
below) and let me know you want to be on the list!
www.missiongo.org
