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MICRO ORGANIZATIONAL BEHAVIORBUS 742
FALL 2005FRIDAYS 4:00-6:00 P.M. & 7:00 TO 9:00 P.M.
Facilitator: Harry J. Bury, Ph.D.Office: 440-826-2395Home: 440-891-9517Mobile: 440-336-2801Fax: 440-826-3868E-Mail: [email protected]
Course Description:The micro-perspective of Organizational Behavior examines small units, namely the individual and small groups. Theories of motivation, learning, perception, communication, personality, decision-making are all emphasized, equipping managers with a sound conceptual understanding of the causes of behavior, a set of tools with which to change behavior, and a body of research findings to support the hypotheses and relationships among personal and environmental causes and behavior outcomes.
The major assumption of this course is that one cannot understand and manage others unless one understands and can manage oneself. One cannot understand the “outside other” unless one understands the “inside self”. Hence, the focus of this course is on you, the participant. Specific exercises will be assigned for this purpose so we can all learn by listening, observing, doing and feeling.
The course focuses largely on the “here and now” – learning from present experience as much as possible. Hence, the emphasis is on process – looking at and learning from what is happening right now in the classroom and how we can make it better. Our objective is not only to learn theory, but to actually improve the present process and, if we are successful at doing this, how we improve the process will be our most significant learning.
A second assumption of this course is that in spite of satisfactory technical skills, people often discover at some point in their career that they do not know how to work effectively with others or have the interpersonal skills to be a good manager. Organizational Behavior speaks to this limitation and presents the same type of content and training found in executive development programs (only cheaper). The course seeks to help us understand why we behave as we do in organizations and groups. By the end of the course, we should know ourselves better and have better people skills. We will be able to watch ourselves behave, reflect upon our observed behavior of ourselves and, then, change our own behavior, if we desire to do so. At the end of each evening class, each person will be able to write a reflection about the four hour learning experience.
The overall purpose of the course is to enable us to develop the people skills we need to be effective employees or managers and improve the effectiveness of our organizations. The
2topics to be covered are the practical skills all managers need to possess. Immediate application at work and home is our goal.
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Course Objectives:To increase our self-awareness
To increase our awareness of what is happening between us, others and the organization plus what is going on in the organization’s environment that impacts us, our group and the organization itself.
To learn how to learn
To enable us to become more skilled at analyzing behavior in organizations
To enable us to learn what actions are appropriate for different situations
To enable us to acquire a larger repertoire of behaviors or skills
Required Texts:
1. Organizational Behavior: An Experiential Approach by Osland, Kolb, and Rubin. Prentice Hall, 7th Edition, 2001 ISBN 0-13-017610-9
2. Self-Assessment Library: Insights into Your Skills, Abilities and Interests, Robbins, S. Pearson- Prentice Hall, 3rd Edition, 2005 ISBN 0-13-191444-8
3. Learning to Build an Effective Team Through the Process of Team Building Workbook
Please bring all three texts to every class.
Class Format
The most effective method for learning interpersonal and managerial skills is experiential learning. This means that we will turn the classroom into a laboratory and create conditions for understanding concepts through experience as well as readings. We will use role plays, exercises, and simulations so that each can pull out his/her own learning points from these experiences. This type of course requires participants to take responsibility for their own learning.
In order for an experiential course to be successful, participants need to do all the reading and homework preparation and participate actively in the classroom.
Please do not underestimate the importance of participation in this course. It is an important part of the final grade, not to mention that it gives each of us an opportunity to practice our communication skills. All of us need to learn to speak up sometimes. Here, among friends, is an excellent place to practice without much risk.
A second text consists in a packet of self-assessment instruments. The instruments are to enable us to understand ourselves better. Usually, we need to fill these out prior to class. Please fill them out carefully and do the scoring before coming to class. The more honestly we answer these instruments, the more accurate a self-portrait we can construct. Learning
4about our own personal self is the valued result. Hence, we need to be as honest as we can be in responding to the self-assessment instruments.
To be an effective systems manager, one needs to be adept at working in teams, achieving goals and objectives with and through other people. To gain more practice, we will usually work with the same learning group in task and will receive feedback from this group on our performance in the course. A text book enabling us to learn how to build an effective team will be used.
First Learning Opportunity
As a team you are to survey a number of employees reporting to the same supervisor seeking to find out what motivates them using a form given out in class. Give the same form to their supervisor asking him or her what the supervisor believes the reports will answer. The team then analyzes the responses and reports the implications in a paper of 5 or 6 pages. Also, give the results of the survey to the workers and their supervisor and include their remarks in the team’s final report. Be prepared to discuss your findings in class.
Second Learning Opportunity
Class members, as a learning team, find a work group/organization that will allow you to survey people at work as to the quality of the work place. Use the survey from the book First Break All the Rules. Determine how fulfilling the respective work place is. Write a paper giving the results and their implications and give it to management and to the individuals who filled out the survey asking for their ideas for improvement. Add this data to the paper giving it to the organization and myself prior to presenting the report in class. Redesign their workgroup’s jobs for the purpose of increasing performance and intrinsic motivation. Return to the workgroup and share your new design with both the workers and the supervisor separately and be attentive to their feedback. Capture the learning from this entire experience in a paper of about 8-10 pages and be prepared to discuss your findings in class.
Third Learning Opportunity
Appreciative Inquiry Change Intervention
Gather all the employees of a company or a department in an organization and have them interview each other on what they see is working well in the company or department.
The two people then share with two others their discoveries and come up with a joint conclusion of the positive aspects.
A representative of each group shares with the other groups resulting in an overall picture of the effective aspects of the total group.
Follow a similar three point design asking “if the group was as effective as it could possibly be, by what would be happening?”
5Gather the data of the two processes and write a paper in the present tense describing the organization or department doing all that the data suggests. Give the description to the total group and have them develop it arriving at a consensus of the total group operating in the best possible way.
Ask people to volunteer to develop action plans to achieve the desired results describes in the paper of the organization or department operating excellently. Facilitate this process and monitor the results. Write a paper describing the process and the results plus the team’s assessment of this organizational intervention including the team’s and each individuals personal learning.
Fourth Learning Opportunity
Alcoholics Anonymous Learning Opportunity
Attend three AA meetings by yourself, write a three page report giving your interpretation of the experience and be prepared to discuss your experience with the class indicating what you learned about yourself and organizational behavior. Apply this learning specifically to your workplace. Do not tell people at the AA meeting that your attendance is a class assignment unless directly asked. Most will assume you are an alcoholic. To announce you are not like them is unconscious arrogance. Visitors, and especially students, are welcome. Call and ask which meeting are open meetings and non-smoking if you are allergic to cigarette smoke. Go alone and don’t take notes.
Performance to standard (doing what is expected) in this course will be awarded with a “B” grade. To achieve and “A” grade, one needs to go beyond standard (do more than what is expected; more than what is required because “A” stands for outstanding, exemplary work. An “A” is similar to a bonus at work due to extra high performance.
If you need to miss class for a serious reason, you need to view an assigned video tape and write a paper describing what you learned. Tapes can be obtained from me. Otherwise 2 points are deducted from the final grade for each missed class. Persons never missing a class receive 2 points added to the total grade. Papers handed in late will have 2 points deducted from the final grade of the paper. In the video papers, be certain to give your thoughts on the subject and how it related to what we are learning in class besides stating what was said. I am most interested in what you thought about what the video teaches than what the video is actually about. And I want to know how you are now changing due to the experience. Return the tape with your paper.
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Learning Opportunities – Due Dates:
Smile Experiment August 26Psychological Contract September 9Leadership Cases September 9Stories Written September 23Motivational Analysis October 7McClelland Theory Paper October 7Surprise Experiment October 7Perception Analysis October 21Socialization Analysis November 18Personality Adjustment Experiment November 18 I Love You Experiment November 18Communication Experiment November 18AA Paper December 2Research Paper December 2
Criteria for Evaluation
First, Second and Third Learning Opportunity 40%Individual Papers and Participation 40%Fourth Learning Opportunity 20%Total 100%
A+ = 98-100 B = 84-87A = 94- 97 B- = 80-83A- = 90- 93 C+ = 78-79B+= 88- 89 Etc.
EXPECTATIONS/OBJECTIVES/GOALS
We expect each of you to:
- Change seats each class meeting . Make a point to sit next to all members of this class organization at least once during this semester.
- Be open and honest with peers, your associates, and me. Let me know what is going well for you and what is not.
- Go out of your way to avoid obstacles with communications. If I am presenting an obstacle to you or become a roadblock, let me know.
- Manage your area of responsibility in such a way as to positively contribute to the overall class results as well as your personal goals and objectives. A gain for you at the expense of someone else is a loss for the whole class. Teamwork is essential -- here is no room for “gamesmanship” or “one up” stuff.
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- Know what is going on in other classes as well as companies and organizations off campus. Visit them and have them visit us – find out how they manage things – steal all the ideas you can – network whenever possible. The greatest compliment you can give me as the class facilitator is to bring friends to class. Especially invite the person to whom you report to participate in class with us and stay for dinner.
- Keep me informed – verbally and with written material – Use your judgment about frequency, methods, etc. I’ll let you know if it is meeting my needs.
- Provide me with feedback (included page 9 through 16) that indicates your ideas, feelings, progress.
- Do your best to solve problems. Don’t present me with problems to solve; instead, develop alternatives and act on them if possible. If you need my input, I am available to provide it. Use me as “sounding board/coach.
- Involve your work team and associates, even family in planning, meeting challenges, improvement, etc. They might know more about something than you do. Mix with second year participants and Health Care EMBAs at lunch and dinner. Serve as mentors, show your knowledge and experience.
- Assess how you are impacting this class – adding to it, treading water, or pulling us under.
- Help me and your class colleagues – volunteer and respond to requests.
- Also, helping others, whether manager, facilitators or colleagues, is not “sucking up”, but networking and cooperative behavior designed to benefit the whole system.
- Continually strive to improve the quality and efficiency of the educational process. Constantly ask yourself, “How can I learn more, better apply what I am learning, help others in the class learn?
- Know all your class colleagues; find out what they need and expect from you; ask them to evaluate you.
- Complete requests from me by the due date or negotiate other arrangements in advance of the due date.
- Lead. If you see a lack of leadership by me or others, take the lead. It is not vested in me. Be proactive rather than reactive.
- Expect a lot from your team, your class colleagues, yourself and from me.
- Behave in ways that positively contribute to us being more human with each other; respect the dignity of each individual.
8- Grow and help others grow. I am bored around people who are treading water. How
are you a more valuable person this month than last – what have you learned, what skills have you improved, how are you better?
- Challenge me, I need to grow too!
- Have a lot of fun doing this work
BALDWIN-WALLACE COLLEGEMBA PROGRAM
POLICIES AND REGULATIONS
As a program designed for experienced, working professionals, the MBA Program at Baldwin-Wallace College expects both students and faculty to behave in a professionally appropriate manner. As is true in most organization, policies and regulations can be useful in helping professionals to select the appropriate response in difficult or conflictual situations. Therefore, in the absence of specific guidelines in a given course syllabus to the contrary, the following policies can be assumed to apply throughout the MBA student’s experience at Baldwin-Wallace College:
1. Attendance : As working professionals with significant work and family responsibilities, it is likely that a student may occasionally have an unavoidable conflict with a class meeting.
a. Notify the instructor of the anticipated conflict.b. Take responsibility for doing any missed assignments.c. Coordinate with members of the student’s class team, if the student is part of a
work/study group.
Unless otherwise stated in the syllabus, there would normally be no other consequences for a single missed class. However, it is also true that some missed classes (i.e., a group exercise) may impair the student’s ability to fulfill future assignments (i.e., a paper based upon the group exercise) which may have negative and necessarily consequential effects on the student’s grade point average. If a second class is missed, the student will be expected to “make up” the class in some fashion appropriate to the course. Typically, the student may be required to do a make-up paper, project or presentation. In addition, as the discretion of the instructor, the student’s grade may be lowered by an amount specified in the syllabus for any unexcused absences. If a third class is missed, the student will normally be dropped from the class and expected to repeat the course unless unusual circumstances make such an action inappropriate. However, if possible, the student should try to anticipate such unusual circumstances before the start of the term and voluntarily sit out the term, rather than unnecessarily suffer a loss of tuition and other administrative consequences of being dropped from the class after the term has begun.
2. Academic Dishonesty : Integrity is one of the most important attributes of a successful professional. A host of stores and news events have documented that even the most competent leaders are likely to seriously derail their careers and lose their leadership effectiveness by committing dishonest acts. Therefore, the commission of any act of
9academic dishonesty or deceit is a serious matter, not only for the college but also for the student’s future career.
Unless the instructor has formulated explicit guidelines to the contrary, any assignment, test, or project which a student or group of students inappropriately submit
as their own, without proper references and attribution, or upon which they inappropriately collaborate when the work was to be individual in nature, may receive a grade of “F” for the course and be terminated from the program. The application of this policy will be up to the discretion of the individual faculty member(s) involved in evaluating the assignment. This policy in no way diminishes the rights of the student(s) with respect to appealing the grade or seeking re-admission into the program.
Any student with a documented disability (e.g., mobility, learning, psychological, vision, hearing, etc.) who needs to arrange accommodations must contact both the instructor and Disability Services at the beginning of the term.
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Harry J. Bury
Harry J. Bury, Ph.D. is an Adjunct Professor of Systems Management at Baldwin-
Wallace College in Berea, Ohio and teaches in both the undergraduate and graduate
divisions (1979 - present).
Dr. Bury also holds the Chair as Director of the Doctorate Program in Business
Administration (DBA) at Burapha University in Bangkok, Thailand. He teaches Advanced
International Organizational Behavior. He earned a Ph.D. from Case Western Reserve
University in Organizational Behavior in 1975. He also completed the Gestalt Institute of
Cleveland's Post-graduate Program in 1975. Since then he has been involved in
individual and large-scale systems change in the industrial, public and community sectors.
In addition, he has co-developed an organic approach to management and organizational
development toward creating open and free-flowing communications, increased productivity,
collaborative management of work team culture, enriched job content and improved
interpersonal and inter-group relations.
Dr. Bury’s career is highlighted by consultations for corporations and governmental
agencies worldwide. He has consulted with such organizations as TRW, Baily Controls,
RTA, EMD Pharmaceuticals, and The U.S. Federal Reserve Bank among others.
Dr. Bury’s international competence in experienced-based-cross-cultural training for
the improvement in communications and problem prevention has been demonstrated as a
consultant to and organizer of three International Assemblies, in Paris, France, Turin, Italy,
and Quebec, Canada, as well as, consultant to companies in Indonesia, Vietnam, China,
Brazil, Hong Kong, Costa Rica, Thailand, and Saudi Arabia.
In 1990, he received the coveted Strosacker Award at Baldwin-Wallace College for
Excellence in Teaching.
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During the 1990-91 academic year, Dr. Bury had the privilege of being a visiting
scholar in residence at Hong Kong Baptist University in Hong Kong. Since then, he has
been doing seminars and workshops two-three times a year in Shanghai, Shenzhen,
Beijing, Guangzhou (China), Vietnam and in East Malaysia. He also has taught at FAE
(Faculdade Catolica de Administracao de Economia) University in Curitiba, Brazil in the
summers of 2000 and 2002 and expects to do so again in May 2004.
In 2001 and 2002, Dr. Bury had the privilege of teaching Leadership, Organizational
Behavior, and Human Resource Management for Southern California University for
Professional Studies, in Vietnam, China, and Malaysia. In the winter semester, 2003 he
was invited and was honored to teach Organizational Behavior in the MBA program at
Assumption University in Bangkok, Thailand.
Dr. Bury co-authored a text: Success in College and Career Simplified, which
was published by Pearson Longman in the Fall of 2004. Presently, he is working on another
book entitled, Thinking and Feeling Differently: An Emerging World View for the Third
Millennium.
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Smile Experiment
1) After attaining eye contact, smile at Ten Strangers and Note their reactions.
2) After attaining eye contact, smile and say “Hello” or “Hi” (Not “how are you?”) to Ten Strangers and Note their reactions.
3) After attaining eye contact, Frown or hold a Straight face at Ten Strangers and Note their reactions.
4) Write a paper containing the data from the above experiment and explain:
a) What you learned about yourself from this experiment
b) What you learned about others from this experiment
c) What are the implications for management and organizational behavior
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THE PSYCHOLOGICAL CONTRACT EXPERIMENT
FACT-FINDING AND THE EXECUTION OF THE EXPERIMENT
1. Select a person with whom you have excellent interpersonal relations and who you know has expectations regarding your behavior. This person can be your manager, spouse, relative, friend, or the like. Carefully explain the nature of the experiment to your partner before you start. If you get any resistance from the person you select, find another partner. If this experiment is to be successful, you need to receive considerable voluntary cooperation form your partner.
2. If your partner is your manager, give him or her copy A of the Expectations Survey No. 1 on the following pages. Ask him or her to fill it out and arrange a meeting to discuss it at a later time.
3. If your partner is a spouse, relative, or friend, give him or her copy A of the Expectations Survey No. 2 on the following pages. Ask him or her to fill it out and arrange a meeting to discuss it at a later time.
4. Before you examine your partner’s entries, fill out Copy B of the appropriate Expectations Survey.
5. Compare copies A and B of the Expectations Survey. If there are any differences of opinion regarding mutual expectations, a discussion of these differences may be appropriate.
WRITTEN REPORT
Answer the questions in the Psychological Contract Experiment Report on the pages following the Expectations Surveys.
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EXPECTATION SURVEY NO. 1 – COPY A
To be completed by employee’s immediate supervisor.
Many employees are not as effective as they could be because they do not have a clear understanding of exactly what is expected of them. Such employees want to do their best, but they are not sure what is wanted and they are reluctant to ask. Employee performance usually improves if the supervisor gets the opportunity to clarify his or her expectations.
The purpose of this survey is to obtain a specific statement of the expectations that the manager has of the employee. Following are several categories of expectations that managers often have of their employees. Check the box to the left of each statement that best describes what you expect of
(name of employee) ____________________________________
Select only one box in each category as you deem appropriate. At the end of the survey, there is space for any written comments you may have. Select your responses based on your personal expectations of this employee rather than on the expectations stated in the policies of your organization. Complete the survey in private and return it to the employee.
1. Use of time. I expect the employee to:
___ Come to work before working hours and stay after quitting time if necessary to get the job done.
___ Rigidly adhere to working hours and break time.
___ Not to be too concerned about the clock but to give me hours of work each week.
___ Come and go as he or she pleases as long as the work is done.
___ Come and go as he or she pleases whether or not work is done.
2. Quality of work effort. I expect the employee to:
___ Work at top speed and make no mistakes at all times.
___ Work at a reasonable speed and make a minimum of mistakes at all times.
___ Work at a speed that will get all of the work out with a below average number of mistakes.
___ Work at a speed that will get most of the work out with an average rate of mistakes.
Work at a speed and mistake rate with which he or she feels comfortable.
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3. Loyalty. I expect the employee to:
___ Place my personal career interests above all else.
___ Be loyal enough to me such that he speaks well of me and is willing to cover up all my mistakes.
___ Be loyal to me as long as it is in the best interest of the organization.
___ Be loyal to me such that he does not foment disloyalty among other employees.
___ Do as he or she wants about being loyal to me.
4. Interpersonal relations with me. I expect the employee to:
___ Maintain formal and respectful deference to me as his or her manager.
___ Maintain informal relations with me, but give me full respect as his or her manager.
___ Maintain informal relations with me and give me respect as a friend.
___ Maintain a buddy-buddy relationship with me and treat me as a complete equal.
___ Maintain a relationship with me and treat me in a manner with which he or she feels most comfortable.
5. Interpersonal relations with other employees. I expect the employee to:
___ Maintain a formal business-like relationship with other employees with due respect of their position in the organization.
___ Maintain formal business-like relationships with an employee with appropriate consideration toward their positions in the organization.
___ Maintain informal friendly relationships with other employees and treat them as equals.
___ Maintain deep personal relationships with other employees with whom he or she is compatible.
___ Maintain such relationships with other employees as he or she feels comfortable.
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Appearance. I expect my employee to:
___ Be immaculately clean, well groomed, and in appropriate business attire at all times when on the job.
___ Be reasonably clean, adequately groomed, and dressed in presentable sports wear at most times on the job.
___ Be clean, not disheveled, and dressed in comfortable clothing most of the time on the job.
___ Have an appearance on the job that is better than grossly unclean and sloppy.
___ To appear on the job as he or she sees fit.
6. Attitude. I expect the employee to:
___ Be enthusiastic, cheerful, pleasant and eager at all times while on the job.
___ Be enthusiastic, cheerful pleasant, and eager at all times while on the job except where there is good reason not to be.
___ Accept his duties on the job without complaint and do them willingly while being civil to others in the organization.
___ Not be apathetic, morose, unpleasant or lazy while on the job.
___ Have any attitude on the job with which he or she feels comfortable.
What other expectations do you have of this employee?
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________
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EXPECTATIONS SURVEY NO. 1 – COPY B
To be completed by the employee.
The following is a list of several categories of expectations that, managers, and employees often have of their employees. After you submit copy A of this survey to your manager for completion and before he or she returns it, complete this Copy B of the survey. Check the lines below as you believe your manager will check them. After you receive Copy A from your manager, compare the lists and see how well you understand what is expected of you on the job.
1. Use of time. I expect the employee to:
___ Come to work before working hours and stay after quitting time if necessary to get the job done.
___ Rigidly adhere to working hours and break time.
___ Not to be too concerned about the clock but to give me hours of work each week.
___ Come and go as he or she pleases as long as the work is done.
___ Come and go as he or she pleases whether or not work is done.
2. Quality of work effort. I expect the employee to:
___ Work at top speed and make no mistakes at all times.
___ Work at a reasonable speed and make a minimum of mistakes at all times.
___ Work at a speed that will get all of the work out with a below average number of mistakes.
___ Work at a speed that will get most of the work out with an average rate of mistakes.
___ Work at a speed and mistake rate with which he or she feels comfortable.
3. Loyalty. I expect the employee to:
___ Place my personal career interests above all else.
___ Be loyal enough to me such that he speaks well of me and is willing to cover up all my mistakes.
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___ Be loyal to me as long as it is in the best interest of the organization.
___ Be loyal to me such that he does not foment disloyalty among other employees.
___ Do as he or she wants about being loyal to me.
4. Interpersonal relations with me. I expect the employee to:
___ Maintain formal and respectful deference to me as his or her manager.
___ Maintain informal relations with me, but give me full respect as his or her manager.
___ Maintain informal relations with me and give me respect as a friend.
___ Maintain a buddy-buddy relationship with me and treat me as a complete equal.
___ Maintain a relationship with me and treat me in a manner with which he or she feels most comfortable.
5. Interpersonal relations with other employees. I expect the employee to:
___ Maintain a formal business-like relationship with other employees with due respect of their position in the organization.
___ Maintain formal business-like relationships with an employee with appropriate consideration toward their positions in the organization.
___ Maintain informal friendly relationships with other employees and treat them as equals.
___ Maintain deep personal relationships with other employees with whom he or she is compatible.
___ Maintain such relationships with other employees as he or she feels comfortable.
6. Appearance. I expect my employee to:
___ Be immaculately clean, well groomed, and in appropriate business attire at all times when on the job.
___ Be reasonably clean, adequately groomed, and dressed in presentable sports wear at most times on the job.
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___ Be clean, not disheveled, and dressed in comfortable clothing most of the time on the job.
___ Have an appearance on the job that is better than grossly unclean and sloppy.
___ to appear on the job as he or she sees fit.
7. Attitude. I expect the employee to:
___ Be enthusiastic, cheerful, pleasant and eager at all times while on the job.
___ Be enthusiastic, cheerful pleasant, and eager at all times while on the job except where there is good reason not to be.
___ Accept his duties on the job without complaint and do them willingly while being civil to others in the organization.
___ Not be apathetic, morose, unpleasant or lazy while on the job.
___ Have any attitude on the job with which he or she feels comfortable.
What other expectations do you have of this employee?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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EXPECTATIONS SURVEY NO. 2 – COPY A
To be completed by a partner contacted by person conducting the experiment
Many interpersonal relationships run into difficulties because the partners do not understand what each expects of the other. Each tried to fulfill the expectations of the other, but sometimes fails because of such misunderstandings. If the partners address the problem of mutual expectations, the result is usually an improvement of interpersonal relations.
The purpose of this survey is to clarify the expectations each partner has of the other. The following list poses several questions regarding the expectations that spouses, relatives, and friends have of one another. In private, answer each question in a way that best describes what you expect of your partner and what you believe your partner expects of you. Your partner is completing a similar survey. After both are finished, compare results.
1. Use of time.
Number of hours per week I expect my partner to devote to me. ___ hours.
Number of hours per week my partner expects me to devote to him or her. ___ hours.
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
2. Priority.
a. Among the many interpersonal relationships my partner has, I expect to be given priority (1, 2, 3, etc.) ___
b. Among the many interpersonal relationships I have, my partner expects me to give him or her priority (1, 2, 3, etc.) ___
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
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Financial Assistance.
a. Percentage of my total required financial support that I expect to receive from my partner. ___%
b. Percentage of my partner’s total required financial support that he or she expects to receive from me. ___%
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
3. Influence.
a. Percentage of the times I expect to be able to decisively influence the attitudes, behaviors, and decisions of my partner. ___%
b. Percentage of the times my partner expects too decisively influence my attitudes, behaviors, and decisions. ___%
Comments:
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
4. Consideration.
a. Percentage of times I expect my partner to be on time, keep appointments, remember important anniversaries, and so on. ___%
b. Percentage of times my partner expects me to be on time, keep appointments, remember important anniversaries, and so on. ___%
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
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6. Attention.
a. Number of times each month I expect my partner to express love or friendship, touch me, compliment me, show concern for my feelings, offer assistance, listen to my problems, and the like. ___
b. Number of times my partner expects me to express love or friendship, touch him or her, give compliments, show concern for feelings, offer assistance, listen to his or her problems, and the like. ___
Comments:
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
5. Task Performance.
a. List five specific tasks that you expect your partner to perform:
1._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
2._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
3._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
4._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
5._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
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b. List five specific tasks that your partner expects you to perform:
1._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
2._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
3._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
4._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
5._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
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EXPECTATIONS SURVEY NO. 2 – COPY B
To be completed by person conducting the experiment.
While the partner you selected is completing Copy A of Expectations Survey No. 2, you complete Copy B of the survey. When both copies of the survey are complete,you should have a good written record of mutual expectations of each other and how much each partner understands the other’s expectations of him or her. A joint comparison of Copies A and B by you and your partner might prove beneficial to your understandings of your mutual expectations.
1. Use of time.
Number of hours per week I expect my partner to devote to me. ___ hours.
Number of hours per week my partner expects me to devote to him or her. ___ hours.
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
2. Priority.
a. Among the many interpersonal relationships my partner has, I expect to be given priority (1, 2, 3, etc.)___
b. Among the many interpersonal relationships I have, my partner expects me to give him or her priority (1, 2, 3, etc.) ___
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
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3. Financial Assistance.
a. Percentage of my total required financial support that I expect to receive from my partner. ___%
b. Percentage of my partner’s total required financial support that he or she expects to receive from me. ___%
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
4. Influence.
a. Percentage of the times I expect to be able to decisively influence the attitudes, behaviors, and decisions of my partner. ___%
b. Percentage of the times my partner expects too decisively influence my attitudes, behaviors, and decisions. ___%
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
5. Consideration
a. Percentage of times I expect my partner to be on time, keep appointments, remember important anniversaries, and so on. ___%
b. Percentage of times my partner expects me to be on time, keep appointments, remember important anniversaries, and so on. ___%
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
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6. Attention.
a. Number of times each month I expect my partner to express love or friendship, touch me, compliment me, show concern for my feelings, offer assistance, listen to my problems, and the like. ___
b. Number of times my partner expects me to express love or friendship, touch him or her, give compliments, show concern for feelings, offer assistance, listen to his or her problems, and the like. ___
Comments:
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
7. Task Performance.
c. List five specific tasks that you expect your partner to perform:
1._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
2._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
3._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
4._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
5._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
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d. List five specific tasks that your partner expects you to perform:
1._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
2._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
3._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
4._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
5._________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
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PSYCHOLOGICAL CONTRACT EXPERIMENT REPORT
1. Without revealing names, describe the relationship between you and the partner you selected.
2. Describe exactly what happened when you contacted your partner. What response did you receive? How did you feel during the contact?
3. How did you feel when you compared the results found in Copies A and B of the survey? Did you find any differences in your mutual expectations? If so, describe each difference.
4. Did you discuss the survey results with your partner? What did you talk about? How did you feel during the discussion? What were the outcomes of the discussion?
5. Did you improve your mutual understanding of the psychological contract you have with your partner? Explain.
6. Explain in specific detail what positive or negative effects this experiment had on the interpersonal relationship between you and your partner.
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THE MOTIVATIONAL ANALYSIS EXPERIMENT REPORT
1. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs: Provide the following information for each of the needs identified by Maslow, expect self-actualization. What percentage of these needs are now being met by you? List actual behaviors you do now to meet each one of these needs. How much time do you spend on meeting each need in a 24 hour period. State
specific hours as, for example, I sleep 6 hours on average each night.
a. Physiological needs.b. Safety and security needs. (What do you fear? List what you are motivated to
do about your fears.)c. Social, belonging, and love needs.d. Esteem and autonomy needs. (List exactly what you do to get others to respect
you. List exactly what you do to get yourself to respect yourself.)e. Describe your concept of what your life would be like if you were meeting your
self-actualization needs. Actually state what your particular work is or would be if you were self-actualized.
f. Give an example of when you were motivated by one of the exceptions to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs theory.
2. Herzberg’s Two Factor Analysis: Relate your present job or your school work to Herzberg’s factors.
a. Are you satisfied with your present pay or grades?Yes___ No___
Would an increase of pay in your present job or grades cause you to work harder on a permanent basis?Yes___ No___ Explain your answer.
b. Are any of the other Herzberg hygiene factors sources of motivation to you?Yes___ No___ Explain your answer.
c. Does your job contain any of Herzberg’s motivators?Yes___ No___ Explain your answer.
3. Skinner’s Operant Conditioning Theory: Give two examples of how your behavior has been conditioned.
4. Give an example of one of your current behaviors with which you are the least comfortable. Explain in terms of motivational theory why you do not change this behavior.
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THE PERCEPTION ANALYSIS EXPERIMENT REPORT
1. Briefly describe your socialization. What values were imbued in you by those responsible for managing your early life? Have any changed? What happened to bring about these changes?
2. What perception descriptors do you normally use? Focus on other person’s behaviors, not what they cannot control such as gender, age, beauty, and size. Give specific examples of (1) how these descriptors served you well and (2) how they caused you to make a mistake. Something such as confidence or dedication is difficult to observe. They call for interpretation of behavior. The question asks you rather what behaviors catch your eye when you meet a stranger such as an interviewee.
3. Briefly describe your personality. Give two specific examples of (1) how your personality has affected your perceptions positively and (2) how your personality has affected your perceptions negatively.
4. List at least two of your Prejudices that are not stereotypes . Give a specific example of how one of these prejudices affected your perception in the past. In judging others have your perceptions ever been influenced by the halo or horn effect? If so, explain.
5. Identify a stereotype you have had . What people or things belonged to your stereotypes group? What characteristics did you assign to members of the group? Give an example where you saw a member of the group who did not fit the stereotype so you rationalize the situation as the ‘exception that proves the rule.’ How has the stereotype affected you, has this subconscious activity affected your perception?
6. Identify some specific attitude you feel very strongly about (“I hate cats”) or a behavior you repeatedly exhibit (“I always whistle while I work”) that you cannot explain. Do you have any ideas of how the basis for this attitude or behavior entered you subconscious? How has this subconscious activity affected your perception?
7. Do you differentiate your perceptions of the behavior of people in higher, equal or lower roles and statuses? Give a specific example of how someone’s role or status affected your perceptions process. Does your perception influence you behavior towards people of high or low status in your eyes?
8. Give a specific example of how transference affected your perception of somebody or something.
9. In doing this experiment, have you learned anything that will help you as a manager in the future? If so, what?
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SOCIALIZATION ANALYSIS PAPER
1. LIST your basic assumptions about “reality”: the way you perceive the world presently (the way things are):
a.) In generalb.) In terms of managementc.) In terms of groups or teams in organizations
This is the “Descriptive Model” from your perspective. Examples or reasons “why” you perceive the world this way although helpful, are not necessary. place emphasis on the length of your perception list.
2. LIST your basic assumptions regarding how you would like “reality” to be. This is the “Normative Model” and manifests your “core values”. Again do so:
a.) In generalb.) In terms of managementc.) In terms of groups or teams in organizations
Also, examples and explanations, while sometime helpful, are not necessary. Place emphasis on capturing your basic value assumptions.
3. Describe the socialization process that brought you to perceive “reality” the way you described it in #1 and the way you would like it to be as described in #2. This description gives the reasons for your present perceptions of “reality” and values. Be sure to focus on the process – “the how” you came to have these perceptions and values rather than perceiving “reality” and wanting “reality” to be the same as your colleagues in this program. In other words, how come you perceive the world differently and want it to be different, perhaps, from how your colleagues in this program perceive it and desire it to be?
4. LIST examples of normal behaviors on your part (as many as you can think of) how you walk your talk, how your present behaviors are consistent with how you perceive “reality” in #1 and how you would like “reality” to be in #2.
5. LIST examples of behaviors on your part that might be interpreted by yourself or others as inconsistent with “your truth” in #1 and/or your values in #2.
6. Indicate what was the learning for you in doing the above analysis. How does it relate to Perception Theory?
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The Personality Adjustment Experiment
1. Identify five frank and sincere persons whom you trust. Ask each one separately to tell you which characteristics of your personality they like the best and which they like the least. Be sure they give an example of each characteristic. To make sure you understand them, repeat their comments in your own words until they agree that is exactly what they meant. During the interviews try not to give verbal or nonverbal cues that influence the person you are interviewing. (If you have an especially durable ego, you can have a trusted friend collect the information from five persons who are assured their remarks will not be identified with them.)
2. Pick one of the least liked characteristics of your personality that you discover during the fact-finding effort. Determine which of your mental attitudes and behavior patterns project this least liked personality characteristic.
3. Select specific mental attitudes and behavior patterns that you can change to improve your personality in this area.
4. For approximately one week force yourself to assume new mental attitudes and behavior patterns that you believe will improve your personality in the selected area. Do at least three specific actions that would go contrary to the negative characteristics chosen to change.
5. Carefully record the reactions of others and your own feelings while you experiment with your new attitudes and behaviors. Discuss the feedback you received.
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THE PERSONALITY ADJUSTMENT EXPERIEMENT REPORT
1. How did you collect your data? What were your perceptions of the perceptions of the people who were providing the data? Do you think they were being candid? Were you surprised with the results?
2. List the facts you collected about others’ perceptions of your personality. Note the difference between behavior examples and personality characteristics.
Person Personality Characteristics Example of Behaviora. Least liked ______________________ ______________________
Best liked ______________________ ______________________
b. Least liked ______________________ ______________________Best liked ______________________ ______________________
c. Least liked ______________________ ______________________Best liked ______________________ ______________________
d. Least liked ______________________ ______________________Best liked ______________________ ______________________
e. Least liked ______________________ ______________________Best liked ______________________ ______________________
3. Which personality characteristics did you select as the one you wanted to change?
4. What mental attitudes do you have that cause you to have this characteristic?
5. Give a specific example of your behavior when you exhibited the characteristic.
6. What new mental attitudes did you adopt to change the characteristic.
7. Give three specific examples of different attempts you made to change your behavior in removing the unwanted characteristic. State when and where you actually did the attempt since beginning the experiment.
8. What was the reaction of others to your change? Did you receive any verbal or nonverbal feedback? Give specific details.
9. How did you think and feel while you were conducting the experiment? Was it hard to do? Did you slip and resume your old mental attitudes and behavior patterns?
10. What were the results of the experiment? Did it result in any permanent change? How do you feel about the experiment now that it is over?
34
The “I Love You” Experiment
INTRODUCTION
In many families there is an unspoken rule that family members (except for husband and wife) do not verbally express their love for one another. In most cases they truly love each other but they just don’t say it. They believe that love should be shown by actions, not words. Members of such families often carry this behavior over into relationships with friends. As families and old friends drift apart the opportunity to show one’s love diminishes and love needs to unfulfilled. Later on, a day arrives when the opportunity to say “I love you” to older relatives and friends is gone forever. Sometimes children raised in these families feel unloved because the parents don’t know how to say “I love you”.
People have difficulty expressing or accepting these three simple words for many reasons. Some people believe “I love you” should be reserved for that one-and-only person of the opposite sex. Others perceive it is inappropriate among persons of the same sex. Others think that it is too much of a commitment or that it might be misinterpreted. Most of these reasons are hang-ups carried over from early socialization. If for no other reason that good mental health everyone needs to be able to say “I love you” when they truly mean it. You may say, “That’s all well and good, but what does it have to do with being a good manager?” The answer is quite simple. Emotions and feelings play a vital part in the lives of everyone 24 hours a day. Our desire the ability to work can be greatly increased or decreased by our feelings. Feelings that are not expressed are always detrimental to our work effort and, when they are adequately expressed, their negative effects are reduced while their positive effects are enhanced.
Therefore, the workplace where the expression of emotions is encouraged, accepted, and understood is a more productive place than where they are not. Likewise, being unable to appropriately express and understand emotions is a handicap to both managers and employees. This experiment gives you an opportunity to deal with the problem of expressing and understanding feelings (almost everyone has this problem to some degree) and to take the first step toward solving it. The expression of love is used in this experiment because love is probably the most positive emotion we have, and sincerely expressing love to someone usually is a rewarding experience.
OBJECTIVES After this experiment you will be better able to:
1. Express the feeling of love.
2. Understand the power of the sincere expression of a feeling.
3. Recognize the need to accept and understand the feelings of others.
4. Experience the reward of expressing a heartfelt emotion.
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FACT-FINDINGIdentify someone you sincerely love, but to whom you have not verbally expressed
that love. The person may be any relative or friend. Think of why you love him or her. Would you really like to tell him or her, “I love you”? Only if the answer is yes should you attempt this experiment.
EXECUTION OF THE EXPERIMENT
Pick an appropriate time, place, and method (face-to-face) to express your love for the person you select. Plan in advance what you want to say. Tell the person that you love her or him and why. If you think this person may misinterpret your comments, explain exactly what you mean. Carefully observe the person’s reaction. Try to remember every word he or she says, the tone of voice used, and any nonverbal cues exhibited. Do not tell the person this is an experiment for class.
THE “I LOVE YOU” EXPERIMENT REPORT
1. In a general way (names are not necessary), identify the person you selected and discuss your past interpersonal relationship.
2. Explain why you love this person. After you have written your response, comment on the conditional and unconditional love for this person.
3. Why haven’t you ever expressed your love to this person?
4. Relate how you approached the persona and exactly what you said.
5. How did the person react? What did the person do? Exactly what did he or she say?
6. What did you learn by conducting this experiment?
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Surprise Experiment______________________________________________________________________
1. Go by yourself to a place in the woods or by a lake where there are few people or unnatural noises to distract you.
2. Spend an hour doing nothing. That is, do not think about anything in the past, do not think about all the things you need to do in the future. Just quietly be in the present. If thoughts of past or future come to mind, as if turning the page in a book, say to yourself “next” and quietly turn the page in your imagination and go back to the present. Do not fight the past or future thoughts, simply come back to your present surroundings.
3. Notice the birds, ducks, leaves on tress, spiders in the grass etc. As you notice what is “outside of you,” pay attention to what you think and feel about whatever you are observing in the present. In other words, as you pay attention to whatever is happening in nature, notice what you think and feel about same.
4. After an hour return and write a short paper about what you learned from this experience.
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THE COMMUNICATIONS EXPERIMENT
1. Make sure you are well aware of the following:a. How communication works.b. Barriers to communication.c. Characteristics of a positive communications climate.d. The art of listening.
2. Select a specific person whom you see regularly and with whom you would like to improve your communications. Do not select someone with who you now have satisfactory communications. This experiment is especially good with someone you have lived/worked with for a long time.
3. Contact the person and ask them if they will cooperate in this communications experiment. Unless the person is eager to do the experiment and is willing to read the communications material, select another person for the experiment. Copy the handout and give to him or her to read before the initial meeting.
EXECUTION OF THE EXPERIMENT
1. Schedule regular sessions of approximately one hour per day on at least five different days. Be sure your partner does the required reading before you start.
2. In the first session discuss the communications process, barriers to communications, characteristic of a good communications climate, and the art of listening. Keep the discussion general and do not address your communication difficulties until the next meetings.
3. In the second session review the topics covered in the first session and isolate areas that tend to hinder communications between the two of you. If communications begin to falter, then shift the discussion to why they are breaking down. Identify communications problems the two of you have.
4. In the third session discuss ways that communications or hurt feelings that have occurred between you and your partner as a result of your communications problems.
5. In the fourth session identify misunderstandings or hurt feelings that have occurred between you and your partner as a result of your communications problems.
6. In the fifth session practice your improved communications by planning how you will maintain better communications in the future. Evaluate the results of your experiment.
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THE COMMUNICATIONS EXPERIMENT REPORT
1. Without revealing the name of your partner, describe the nature of your past and present relationship.
2. Describe exactly what happened when you first contacted your partner. What was your partner’s reaction? Was your partner willing to study the material on communications? How did you feel during the contact?
3. When, where, and how long was your first session? How did you prepare for it? As you discussed the following topics in your first session did you have any differences in opinion regarding word meaning or definitions? Explain. Use Roadblocks handout here. Do not discuss communications between the two of you. The point of the first meeting is to read the material and write down anything each of you do not understand so you can discuss what it means.
4. When, where, and how long was your second session? How did you prepare for it? What communications problems did you isolate in your second session? How did you feel during this session?
5. How are you and your partner going to solve the communications problems identified in the second session? How did you feel during the session? When, where, and how long was the third session?
6. What misunderstandings and/or hurt feelings did you identify in the fourth session? Did your discussion remove these misunderstandings and/or ameliorate the hurt feelings? How did you feel during the session? When, where, and how long was the fourth session?
7. In the fifth session, what did you and your partner agree on as a plan to improve your communications in the future? What is your evaluation of the experiment? How do you feel about the experiment now? When, where, and how long was your fifth session?
39Communication Roadblocks
1. ORDERING, COMMANDING, DIRECTING
'These messages tell employees that his feelings, needs, or problems are not important, he must comply with what you feel or need.They tell others that they are unacceptable as he is at the moment.They produce fear of power. Employees hear a threat of being punished by someone bigger and stronger than themselves.They may make employees resentful or angry and may cause them to express hostile feelings - fight back, resist, and sabotage.They can communicate that the employer doesn't trust the employee's competence or judgment.
2. WARNING. THREATENING
These messages are very much like ordering, commanding, and directing, but the consequences for refusal to comply are added.They tell the employee that the employer has little respect for his needs or wishes.They can make a subordinate feel fearful and submissive.Like orders and commands, such warnings and threats evoke hostility.
3. MORALIZING, PREACHING. GIVING "SHOULDS AND OUGHTS"
These messages bring to bear on employees the power of outside authority, duty or obligation. Employees commonly respond to "shoulds and oughts" by resisting and defending their postures even more strongly.Moralistic messages convey to subordinates that the boss does not trust their judgment; that they had better accept what others deem right.They cause feelings of guilt; convince employees that they are "bad".They imply that the boss has no faith in the student's ability to form opinions, make judgments, or hold values of his own.
4. ADVISING, OFFERING SOLUTIONS OR SUGGESTIONS
Such messages are heard by subordinates as evidence that supervisors don't have confidence in the subordinates' ability to solve their own problems.They sometimes influence workers to become dependent on supervisors, to stop thinking for themselves, to turn to outside" authorities" for answers in every stressful situation.Advice communicates an attitude of superiority (I know what's best for you). Since advising implies superiority on the part of the supervisor, subordinates sometimes spend excessive time reacting to this attitude instead of developing ideas of their own.These messages frequently leave employees feeling that they have been misunderstood; that if the supervisor had understood, he wouldn't have suggested the solution he came up with. The feeling is, "if you really understood how I feel, you wouldn't make such a dumb suggestion.".
5. TEACHING LECTURING. GIVING LOGICAL ARGUMENTS
40Though teaching, lecturing and giving logical arguments are legitimate functions in the no-problem area of the boss-subordinate relationship, they are regarded by subordinates as illegitimate at other times. Subordinates experiencing problems may react to "teaching" by feeling inferior, inadequate, etc.Logic and "facts often evoke defensiveness and resentment since they imply that the subordinate is illogical or ignorant.Adults seldom relish being shown that they are "wrong". Consequently, they tend to defend their positions to the bitter end. They think, "I'm right, you're wrong, and I'll prove it if it kills me."Lecturing has always been an inefficient method of teaching. When it is used inappropriately, it is not only inefficient, it is hated. People feel "hassled" and quit listening.Workers sometimes resort to desperate methods of discounting supervisor "facts°. They write off supervisor's views not only on out-of-job topics but in matters of on-the-job as well.Workers often have more facts and more relevant information about their problems than their employers have, which is why an employer's factual arguments are often interpreted by workers as power plays to get them to "do it my way".
6. JUDGING, CRITICIZING, DISAGREEING. BLAMING
More than any others, these messages make employees feel stupid, inadequate, inferior, unworthy, bad. These negative evaluative statements chip away at employees' self-esteem.Negative criticism provokes counter-criticism. Workers often react by thinking (and sometimes saying), "Well, you're not so great yourself." Often supervisors who are the most prolific users of negative evaluative statements are the very ones who complain the loudest about the lack of cooperation they get from their workers.Evaluation strongly influences subordinates to hide their feelings, play it safe and go elsewhere for help.Subordinates respond with defensiveness and anger to these messages because they need to protect their own self-images. Telling a worker that he is lazy will usually make him angry and almost never make him ambitious.About the only thing worse than negative evaluation is frequent negative evaluation. Workers subjected to a great deal of negative input about themselves come to think of themselves as no good, undeserving, and unlikeable.
7. PRAISING. AGREEING, GIVING POSITIVE EVALUATIONS
While supervisors often understand the terrible hurting power of negative evaluation, they are often shocked to learn that, contrary to commonly held belief, praise is not always beneficial to subordinates and often has very negative effects. A positive evaluation that does not fit a subordinate's self-image may evoke anger. They interpret these positive messages as attempts to manipulate them in a subtle way of influencing them to do what the boss wants.Workers correctly infer that if a boss judges positively, he can also judge negatively at another time. They also correctly infer that to judge implies superiority.The absence of praise in a work situation where praise is frequently used can be interpreted as criticism.
41Praise is also frequently embarrassing when given publicly. Most workers despise being held up as the "good example" as much as being exposed as the "bad example".Workers who are praised a lot may grow to depend on it, even demand it.Finally, subordinates sometimes inter that supervisors who praise them don't really understand them, that the positive evaluation is used to save the supervisor from having to take time to understand what the subordinates are feeling.
8. NAME CALLING, STEREOTYPING, RIDICULING
Name calling, stereotyping, and ridiculing are forms of negative evaluation and criticism, and, as such, have the same devastating effect on employees.The most frequent response of workers to such messages is to give one back. (Maybe not audibly but the thought is there.)Employers who use such messages in attempts to influence employees are invariably disappointed. Instead of looking at themselves realistically, the employees are able to use the employer's unfair message to excuse themselves.
9. INTERPRETING, ANALYZING. DIAGNOSING
Such messages tell subordinates that the supervisor has them "figured out," knows what their motives are or why they behave the way they do. This amateur psychoanalysis can be threatening and frustrating. If the supervisor's analysis is correct, the subordinate feels exposed and embarrassed. If the analysis is wrong, he feels angry at being accused.Subordinates often see these messages as evidence that the boss feels he is the wiser, that from his position of superiority he can see through the subordinate and, like God, know their inner thoughts and feelings. These "I know why" and "I can see through you" messages often cut off any desire on the part of subordinates to say more. They teach subordinates to refrain from sharing information with the boss. It's too risky.
10. REASSURING SYMPATHIZING, CONSOLING, SUPPORTING
On the surface, these messages seem to be helpful to the worker struggling with the problems. In fact, they are not as helpful as they appear. To reassure a worker when he is feeling disturbed about something may simply convince him that you don't understand him.Supervisors reassure and console because they are not comfortable with the strong negative feelings others may have and express whey they are troubled. Reassuring and supportive messages, at these times, tell workers that the boss wants them to stop feeling the way they do.People see through these attempts to get them to change - and distrust them.Sympathy and other devices often used to discount one's feelings stop further communication because workers sense that the supervisor wants them to stop feeling the way they do.No one likes to be told that he is not in touch with reality. All forms of reassurance imply that the troubled person is exaggerating, doesn't understand how things really are, is in a sense "crazy". This is why people sometimes react with hostility to attempts by others to make them feel better with support and sympathy.
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11. QUESTIONING. PROBING, INTERROGATING, CROSS - EXAMINING
To ask questions when subordinates have problems may convey a lack of trust, some suspicion and doubt.People often interpret some questions as attempts to entrap, to get them out on a limb, only to have the limb saved off.Subordinates often feel threatened by questions, especially when they don't understand why the person is questioning them. Notice how often people respond to a question with one of their own.When the boss questions a worker who is sharing a problem, the worker may infer that the boss is trying to get information in order to solve the problem for him, rather than let him solve his own problem.When a question is asked of a subordinate sharing a problem, each question limits the person's freedom to talk about what he wants to talk about. In a sense, each question dictates the next message. If you ask, "When did you first notice this feeling?", the person must talk about the onset of that feeling, nothing else. Lawyers learn the techniques of cross-examination in order to extract the truth from unfriendly witnesses. The lawyer directs. The recalcitrant witness tells as little as possible. Interrogation is, therefore, a poor method for facilitating open and constructive communication.Questions are most frequent when the employer's desire to know more - his natural curiosity - gets in the way of his ability to be helpful.
12. WITHDRAWING DISTRACTING, BEING SARCASTIC, HUMORING, DIVERTING
Such messages can communicate to a worker that the boss is not interested in him, doesn't respect his feelings and may even be rejecting him.Employees are generally quite serious and intent when they need to talk about a problem. Responding with kidding, teasing, sarcasm, or humor can make them feel hurt, rejected, and put down.Putting subordinates off, diverting them from their feelings of the moment, may appear successful at first. But a person's feelings tend to reappear until dealt with. Problems put off are not problems solved.People want to be heard and understood respectfully. Supervisors who use sarcasm, humor and distractions teach subordinates to take their problems elsewhere. These people are written off by the workers as helping agents and, unfortunately, as persons they might trust and have a relationship with.
ROADBLOCKS
1. Ordering, Directing, CommandingYou must do this. You cannot do this. I expect you to do this. Stop it. Go apologize to her.
2. Warning. Admonishing. ThreateningYou had better do this or else ....
43If you don't do this, then .... You better not try that. I warn you, if you do that ....
3. Moralizing. Preaching. ImploringYou should do this. You ought to try it. It is your responsibility to do this. It is your duty to do this. I wish you would do this.I urge you to do this.
4. Advising, Giving Suggestions or SolutionsWhat I think you should do is .... Let me suggest .... It would be best for you if .... Why not take a different approach? The best solution is ....
5. Persuading with Logic, Lecturing. ArguingDo you realize that .... The facts are in favor of .... Let me give you the facts. Here is the right way. Experience tells us that ....
6. Judging, Criticizing, Disagreeing, BlamingYou are acting foolishly. You are not thinking straight. You are out of line. You didn't do it right. You are wrong. That is a stupid thing to say.
7. Praising Agreeing. Evaluating Positively. Buttering upYou usually have very good judgment. You are an intelligent person. You have so much potential. You've made quite a bit of progress. You have always made it in the past.
8. Name?calling. Ridiculing. ShamingYou are a sloppy worker. You are a fuzzy thinker. You're talking like an engineer. You really goofed on this one!
9. Interpreting Analyzing. DiagnosingYou're saying this because you are angry.
44You are jealous. What you really need is .... You have problems with authority. You want to look good. You are being a bit paranoid.
10 Reassuring Sympathizing Consoling SupportingYou'll feel different tomorrow. Things will get better. It is always darkest before the dawn. Behind every cloud there's a silver lining. Don't worry so much about it. It's not that bad.
11. Proving. Questioning, InterrogatingWhy did you do that? How long have you felt this way? What have you done to try to solve it? Have you consulted with anyone? When did you become aware of this feeling? Who has influenced you?
12. Distracting, Diverting, KiddingThink about the positive side. Try not to think about it until you're rested. Let's have lunch and forget about it. That reminds me of the time when .... You think you've got problems!
COMMUNICATION FACILITATORS
1. PASSIVE LISTENING (SILENCE)Encourage students to talk once they have started, but does not meet students' needs for interactive and responsive two-way communication.Silence does not "interrupt students," but students never know if the teacher is paying attention. Nor do they get any proof that the teacher understands.It may communicate some degree of acceptance, but students may guess that the teacher is evaluating while being silent. Silence does not communicate empathy and warmth.
2. ACKNOWLEDGEMENT RESPONSESSomewhat better than silence in demonstrating to students that the teacher is paying attention. Such responses do communicate some empathy. They indicate that the teacher is at least awake and attentive.Facilitate further communication from students, but only weakly.Communicate acceptance to some degree, but do not prove teacher acceptance.Do not prove to students that the teacher really understands.
453. DOOR OPENERS, INVITATIONS TO TALKVery effective in showing students that the teacher wants to listen and take the time to be a counselor.Particularly useful at the start, right after the student sends a cue or clue that a problem exists. They can help a student who bogs down or gets stuck while he is sharing the problem.Are not effective in demonstrating acceptance, understanding, or warmth. Invitations open the door but do not keep the door open. If used too often, door openers may sound repetitious.
4. ACTIVE LISTENING (FEEDBACKMakes students feel their ideas and feelings are respected, understood, and accepted. Fosters further communication. Defuses feelings and provides cathartic release. Helps students accept their feelings as natural and human -teaches them that feelings are friends.Facilitates identification of the underlying or real problems. Starts the problemsolving process going, but leaves the responsibility with students to be their own problem solvers.Puts students in the frame of mind of being willing to listen to the teacher. Brings teacher and student into a relationship of greater mutual understanding, mutual respect, mutual caring.Carries the risk of being mechanical and sounding phony or manipulative if used as a gimmick without underlying attitudes of worth, empathy, trust, and acceptance.
USING ACTIVE LISTENING
APPROPRIATE CONDITIONS:Sometimes active listening has the capacity to arouse resentment in the sender when the listener uses it in the wrong circumstances. To avoid feedbacks being greeted with scorn or hostility, the following conditions must be present.
IN THE SENDER:1. The sender must be having feelings and/or experiencing a problem, and the listener must
be picking up cues or clues such as: .a. Clear verbal or non-verbal expressions of those feelings or problems ("I'm
worried,", "I've got a problem,", crying, sulking, etc.).b. Ambiguous, sensitivity-alerting code (3 year-old: "Mommy, did you ever used to
worry a lot about your Mommy and Daddy dying?").2. If feelings or problems are not present in the sender, active listening may be
perceived as a maddening word game or a subtle implication that the sender is unsure he has understood a purely informational input and uses feedback to clarify or verify his understanding.)
IN THE LISTENER:1. The listener must have a genuinely helpful "set" in the following areas:
a. Feeling accepting.
46b. Want to help (not just be turning on a mechanical gimmick).c. Having and wanting to take enough time (unexpectedly lengthy talks can be
ended with an agreed upon appointment to continue later).d. Trusting that sender (read, "other people besides listener") can solve his own
problem better for himself than the listener can (hard to achieve for those committed to culturally prevalent "Medical Model" of helping agent. Hard to believe that owner or problem is his own best "expert.").
e. Feeling reasonably separate. That is, the listener's "button" isn't pushed by the subject matter; the listener can empathize with the sender's pain but not become disabled by it himself; the listener can let the sender be a separate person who owns his own problems in a life separate from the listener's.
(Often hard for parents to achieve.)
6. Starting each feedback with the same phrase (Ex. "What I hear you saying is..."). Such phrases are occasionally useful and are often a handy help for beginners to stay in the active listening mode, but constant repetition is irritating to the sender. (A help for this and the previous error is to start most feedback with the pronoun, you.")
7. Using active listening as a shield when sender is angry at listener. Initial hearing of sender's feelings is usually acceptable to sender, but steadfast refusal to talk any other way is usually perceived as a copout or as playing "doctor" to a "sick" sender.
8. Using active listening to draw him out. The sender owns the conversation. The listener simply offers a safe opportunity if the sender wants to use it. "Drawing out" implies a subtle non-acceptance of silence.
9. Using active listening to develop data which listener then uses to move in with roadblocks - solution, evaluation, reassurance, punishments, etc.
47
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AUTHOR TITLE PUBLISHERAdams, John D., Ph.D. Transforming Leadership Miles River PressAutry, James Love and Profit Avon BooksBailie, Gil Violence Unveiled Crossroad
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Bucke, Richard Maurice, M.D. Cosmic Consciousness E.P. Dutton & Co.Burton-Rose, Daniel The Ceiling of America Common CourageCallenbach, E. – Capra, F…. EcoManagement Berrett-KohlerCapra, Fritjof Uncommon Wisdom Bantam BooksCapra, Fritjof The Web of Life Anchor BooksCapra, Fritjof & Steindl-Rast, David Belonging to the Universe Harper CollinsCarey, Ken The Third Millennium Harper CollinsCarroll, James An American Requiem Houghton-MifflinChawla, Sarita & Renesch, John Learning Organizations Productivity PressCovey, Stephen Principle Centered
LeadershipSummit Books
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Daft, Richard & Lengel, Robert Fusion Leadership Berrett-KohlerDana, Daniel, Ph.D. Managing Differences MTI PublicationsDavies, Paul God & The New Physics Simon & SchusterDevereaux, Mary O’Hara & Johansen, Robert
Global Work Jossey-Bass
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Trinity Press
48
Ford, Martin Motivating Humans SAGE Publications
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CivilizationBear & Co.
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Organizational Behavior – Eighth Edition
South-Western College Publishing
Hirschhorn, Larry Reworking Authority MIT PressHitchcock, John The Web of the Universe Paulist PressHolland, Gail Bernice A Call for Connection New World
LibraryHope, A. – Timmel, S. – Hodzi, C. Training for Transformation Mambo PressHowe, Harold Thinking About Our Kids The Free PressJaworski, Joseph Synchronicity Berrett-KohlerJohnson, David & Roger Learning Together and Alone Allyn and BaconKohn, Alfie Punished by Rewards Houghton-MifflinKongstvedt, Peter R. The Managed Health Care
Handbook – 3rd EditionAspen Publications
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Kuhn, Thomas The Structure of Scientific Revolutions
University of Chicago
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Ballantine Books
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The Quickening of America Jossey-Bass
Liderbach, Daniel The Numinous Universe Paulist PressLipman-Blumen, Jean The Connective Edge Jossey-BassManz, C. & Sims, H. Business Without BossesMarcus, Leonard Renegotiating Health Care Jossey-BassMcLagan, Patricia & Nel, Christo The Age of Participation Berrett-KohlerMoore, James F. The Death of Competition Harper BusinessMurton, Thomas The Dilemma of Prison
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Prentice Hall
Ohmae, Kenichi The Borderless World Harper BusinessOrnish, Dean, Dr. Program for Reversing Heart
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Tarcher Putnam
Robbins, Anthony Unlimited Power Fawcett Columbine
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Prentice Hall
Robbins, Stephen Organizational Behavior: Concepts, Controversies, Applications
Prentice Hall
Rosenberg, Marshall B., Ph.D. Nonviolent Communication A Language…
PuddleDancer Press
Rothman, Jay Resolving Identify-Based Conflict
Jossey-Bass
Ruwart, Mary J., Dr. Healing Our World SunStar PressSchermerhorn, Hunt & Osborn Basic Organizational
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Senge, Peter M. The Fifth Discipline DoubledaySiegel, Bernie S., M.D. Love, Medicine & Miracles Harper & Row
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Siegel, Bernie S., M.D. Peace, Love & Healing Harper & RowSmither, Houston, McIntire Organization Development Harper CollinsTarnas, Richard The Passion of the Western
MindBallantine Books
Thomas, Lewis The Fragile Species Scribner’s SonsWheatley, Margaret J. Leadership and the New
ScienceBerrett-Kohler
Wheatley, Margaret J. & Kellner-Rogers Myron
A Simper Way Berrett-Kohler
Wilber, Ken Quantum Questions ShambhalaWilber, Ken The Essential ShambhalaWilliams, Redforn, M.D. The Trusting Heart Times BooksWilliamson, Marriane The Healing of America Simon & SchusterWink, Walter Engaging the Powers Fortress PressWink, Walter The Powers that Be DoubledayYasutake, Michael, Rev. Can’t Jail the Spirit CEML
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VIDEOS
AUTHOR TITLEAccelerated Work DesignFive Skills for Getting to “Yes” Short Cut VersionGetting to “Yes” Tape OneGetting to “Yes” Tape TwoGroupthink: Revised EditionLeadership & the New Science Meeting in ProgressTeam BuildingThe Massey Triad: Part A The Past with Dr. Massey #11
Ackoff, Russell Dinner Presentation B-W 19 March 1990Bandura, Albert Self-Efficacy: The Exercise of Control Baldwin-Wallace
College 7 March 1997 – 10:10-11:00 a.m.Barker, Joe Discovering the FutureBarker, Joe The Power of VisionDe Geus, Arie Infrastructure and its Impact on Organizational SuccessRosenberg Resolving Conflicts with Children & AdultsSenge, Peter A Crisis of PerceptionSenge, Peter Building Learning InfrastructureSenge, Peter Developing Communities of CommitmentSenge, Peter Infrastructures for Sustaining Transformational ChangeSenge, Peter System Dynamics & the Learning OrganizationSenge, Peter The Fifth Discipline & the Infrastructures of a Learning
OrganizationSenge, Peter Transforming the Practice of Management
