Mirrors of my Soul

8/14/2019 Mirrors of my Soul

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iSTOLEN MOMENT

Walking this morning

I was in my glory

The sun was beaten

The horses were calling

We walked and walked

And no one talked

This stolen moment

With my Gizzy, Myrtle and Axsil to

Was all I needed

For this minute to be true

My heart filled with peace

My eyes see magic

Only to walk further

And come into tragic

This stolen moment

As my eyes shut

Forgotten, gone

So darkness I trust

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iTALK IS CHEAP

I don’t want to talk anymore

What are words?

What are they for?

Actions speak

Don’t pretend to understand

Why talk, when one

Has a hand

Words are habits

Thought controlled

By now my head

Is on its own

Talk is cheap

I won’t weep

My tongue will be silenced

From now on just violence

Ssh Ssh as I begin

My hush

i

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iTHERAPIST

Today I don’t feel red

And I don’t feel blue

In my head is therapy

Showing me what to do

One thought here, one thought there

Superman comes so I don’t despair

Far, far into the sky

My five fingers come up high

Contract, therapy all from you

My therapist, my therapist

Without, what would I do?

Today is the day not to obey

Coz my therapist, today I walk

With you.

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iTRUST

How many times have I been told?

Don’t trust or believe

In all you hold

I hold nothing

And still don’t trust

So what is the matter?

With this utter lust

To feel hurtful

And stay alive

No one can tell

How you survive

So close the door

Don’t let them in

As only you

Know where to begin


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iWORDS LEFT UNSAID

I have a hole in my logic

My feelings are not switched on

When asked, I try

But don’t get by

The mood that is so strong

So many people to be in one head

Yet so many words’s left unsaid

One needs to be bold

So that the others are told

Don’t kill or hurt

Or your soul will be sold


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i3 am

Darkness, the dead of night

No soul to see

No star so bright

The dead that walk

In the height of night

To scare and fright

The kids tonight

Evil lurks in all our homes

Suffocating, strangling

Taking our souls

And going where no one knows

3am the bewitched hour

Don’t wake or move

There are no sources in the current document.

And give the dead power


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iAxsil

I sit here on my own

Listening to Axsil as he groans

My tummy in knots

Head full of rocks

Waiting, Waiting

For the unknown

How I wish for this feeling to go

To join spirits in the unknown

But wishes arespecial

To which I get none

My moods are lost

As to which one to make one


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BLADE FROM ABOVE

Vein’s that bleed poison

Fire boiling my blood

Holding my anger

As the blade from above

Slice’s and cuts

That my blood spills

As I drift one step closer

To death door with pills

I want to scream

I want to cause pain

You are the reason for

This cut vein

I was impulsive

And don’t know why

I say or do the things

That keeps me high

You say you know me

You’re not even close

You see what I let you

My door is now closed

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iBLEEDING EYES

Dark bleeding eyes

Bruised, Blind, Black

After ones attack

There’s no turning back

Eye’s become all the same

Looking and looking

For that name

You begin to see all the pain

In the eyes of others

That feels the same

Take them out

Roll them away,

Do not see

The pain in me


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iCALIFORNIA BLAZING

Fire burning, The heat amazing

California, America

Are both blazing!

When will we listen

Mother earth is fighting back

Killing the innocent

Why we laugh behind it’s back

It show’s we are nothing

Not fighting back

As long as it’s nature

We can sit back

Can’t imagine the life taken

So that we human’s

Don’t burn

The insects and animals

Are all that’s my concern



iCANCER

How may disappointments

Can one survive?

Beneath the surface

My cancer hides

I have no answers

And don’t know why

This bloody cancer

Did not pass me by

The tumour breaths so quietly

Day and night

In hope not to be seen

So I cannot fight

Is it my fault?

Why I get sick

The pain within me

My tears like rain

All for cancers gain


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iCANDLE

A white candle

So innocent and lame

Made a child cry

With such grief and pain

When the candle is lit

You see in its flame

The memories you try

To forget in vain

Grief overwhelms me

Walking alone

I hang onto this

Secret all on my own


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iDON’T SURVIVE

I look at you and see chaos

A world upside down

You speak a load of rubbish

Your body so ugly

ust like your personality

So,

Don’t just stand there

Do what we all want you to

Fuck off and die

I want to see you skinned alive,

Pain is what you need just

Take your body

Keep on burning and please

Please don’t survive

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iLIFE SUCKS

Want to kill, hurt, self harm

Such thoughts on my mind

Deeper, deeper to my soul,

Blood burning, thoughts racing

This body is without a home

I shout, I scream

People are always to blame

They evil, I hate them

My head burns in there flame

I want to hurt them so badly

See their blood and gut’s

Teach them a lesson

And tell them life sucks!

I am at the end, were I can be no friend

So angry, so bitter

Please dispose of me as litter!


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iListen to late

Dark side within me

Deep, oh so deep

Nobody out there

Would ever control

If I surfaced

I have warned and told

But lo and behold

They look at me and say

Oh, no she’s ok

Little do they know

And little do I care

As one day my mood

Will surface and boy,

The evil will be out there

Listen to late

The damage is done

To this day

The darkness has won

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iLITTLE LEGS

Grandfather, granddad, little legs

The names you use to get

You are no longer with us

And now we must forget!

You are now with our nana

And now together, that’s all

That matters

Goodbye, goodnight

My star so bright

Shine forever on this night

ii




iMUG ME, HUG ME

Stare in my eyes

Put a gun to my head

Do it, do it

Right now my life is a mess

You have the power

To do what’s best

Stare in my eyes

Put a knife to my throat

Mug me, hug me

Your hands all over

Hurt me, and then kiss me

Like you had no other

How should I die?

I give out a cry

Help me, help me

I whisper to the passerby


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iNESS

Ness my other half

My soul mate

My friend

Together forever

Until the end

You are my world

My everything,

Without I can’t

You are the mind and strength

That keeps me kind

So stay in my sprit

And keep my heart

Beating with love

And we shall never part


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iNO BEGINING, NO END

Pulsing, feeling, throbbing

Choking as I am watched

Eyes upon me

My blood is being clocked

My heart is burning

My vein’s carry smoke

My eyes watch fearfully

My body in shock

Walking into space

No beginning, no end

My so called friends

Destroy and pretend


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iPOISON IN THE VEIN

I feel so let down

You said you would be around

But all you did was kick me

In the ground

My feelings are hurt

My trust gone to dirt

Why oh why did you

Run and burst

The so call talking

That left me cutting

And bleeding, to carry

The poison in the veins

Left seeping

Do not believe in people

They stab where it hurts

And what is gained is despair

Were there’s neither hope nor air


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iPUDDLES

umping in puddles

I love to do,

When I hear the splashing

I know, Ness won’t be laughing

Wet, muddy and Axsil to

We jump and jump

For something to do

We come home and change our clothes

Straight in the machine it all goes

We look at each other

All dry and clean

It’s like the puddle had never been


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Mirrors of my Soul