Monologues (Male) 2013

8/11/2019 Monologues (Male) 2013

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Monologues Male, 2013

Howie from Tina Landau's 1969 OR HOWIE TAKES A TRIP

I remember te first da! of i" s#oo$ and tere we were and te mornin" was fine and

tere was no indi#ation watsoe%er tat in a #ou&$e of ours a few &eo&$e one &erson in

&arti#u$ar (urtis (a$$ender to be e)a#t wou$d destro! m! $ife* I mean w! I a$wa!s

wonder I wasn't dressed funn! I was +inda norma$ I tin+ $oo+in" in fa#t so w! was Iimmediate$! an outsider, (urtis te $eader -ust sto&&ed me in te a$$ $oo+ed at me and

"rabbed me ere b! te #o$$ar and sa!s .e! fa""ot wat are !ou doin" in our s#oo$,.

/ou see te funn! tin" about it $i+e funn! weird not funn! a0a is tat (urtis and I adu& to tat &oint no #onta#t wit ea# oter watsoe%er I mean I ma! a%e seen im on#e

in a wi$e around town but tat was it* So tat was te first time I eard te word

.fa""ot. but I ad to wait unti$ "ot to te safet! s&ot of m! own ouse before I #ou$d $oo+it u& tere's no &$a#e $i+e ome !ou +now and tere it was te trut ri"t tere in te

di#tionar! a bund$e of twi"s* I am a bund$e of twi"s I am a bund$e of twi"s*

In#om&reensib$e to me* Sim&$! and irre%o#ab$! and a$wa!s be!ond meanin" for me Imean it was e%er! da! in te s#oo$ !ear times four for ea# !ear of i" s#oo$ tat I

was #a$$ed fa""ot and I mean #an !ou te$$ me &$ease ow #ou$d someone wo bare$!

+new me ate me so mu#, We$$ !ou +now e's te most &o&u$ar "u! in te s#oo$ so

!ou see e &o&u$ari2ed tis a#ti%it! I mean tat of atin" me so e%er!one wanted to "etinto te a#t !ou +now do te #oo$ tin"* Tat's ow m! orror be"an*

3arius from 4aomi Ii2u+a5s 6 7IEWS

I'm in te no0man's $and between Tai$and and 8urma* O&ium in e%er! $itt$e %i$$a"e*O&ium not e%en te a$f of itsa&&ires i%or! &i"eon b$ood rubiesb$a#+ mar+et a$$

of it and !ou #ou$d "et a bu$$et in !our brain tr!in" to do business wit tese &eo&$e*

Ten a"ain !ou "o in tere -ust ma!be !ou #ome awa! wit sometin" so beautifu$ so

in#redib$! beautifu$ sometin" !ou'd ne%er find not in a mi$$ion !ears on te outsideand if !ou're $u#+! if !ou're smart !ou "et !ourse$f out of tere in one &ie#e*

:nbe$ie%ab$e wat I saw tat ni"t Son" d!nast! tem&$e &aintin"s Kusan &eriod

8uddas a$most two tousand !ears o$d* He ad stuff from An"+or Wat museum ;ua$it!ob-e#ts tere's no wa! e sou$d'%e ad and I'm tin+in" wo are !ou, Wo are !ou,

8e#ause te tin" was I +new as soon as I saw it as soon as I tou#ed it and e$d it in

m! ands I +new it was rea$* 4o ;uestion in m! mind it was rea$ and if I ad enou"mone! it was mine*


2/12

te &!si#a$ $aborto"eter wit bein" out in tat da!+ind of o%ertoo+ us* And we

-ust +e&t "oin" $iftin" and s&$ittin" and $iftin" and s&$ittin" in si$en#e* Pause*? I fe$t $i+e a man*

Pause*? I said notin"* I sta!ed ;uiet* I sta!ed* So se as+s a"ain* .Is !our

fater a&&!,. And te wa! se said it* So des&erate* Soft* Li+e se* Li+e se was in$o%e wit !ou* Or needed to be in $o%e wit !ou* Sounded in need of sometin"* Se

as+s a"ain* And tis time I was about to answer but on#e I "ot stren"t u& to * * * se

un" u&* Se un" u&* I'%e tried to ma+e sense of it* 8ut it's a m!ster!* A tota$ m!ster!*

8ut tose sort of tin"s a&&en I "uess* =!steries "o une)&$ained* Pones "et bro+en*I don't +now wat e$se to sa!* I don't +now*

:nnamed (ara#ter from


3/12

8ut tat doesn't mean an!tin"* It doesn't mean an!tin"* Sometimes r!mes -ust a&&en*

O+a!, (an we $i%e wit tat, Tis is rea$$! "ood &ot !unno tis is some rea$$! rea$$!

"ood stuff*

3ais! from (risto&er 3uran"'s 8A8/ WITH THE 8ATHWATER

Wen I was e$e%en I #ame a#ross tis medi#a$ boo+ tat ad &i#tures in it and I rea$i2ed

I $oo+ed more $i+e a bo! tan a "ir$ but m! moter ad a$wa!s wanted a "ir$ or abestse$$er and I didn't want to disa&&oint er* 8ut ten someda!s I don't +now wat "ets

into me I wou$d -ust fee$ $i+e stri+in" out at tem* So I'd wait ti$$ se was a%in" one of

er #r!in" fits and I too+ te boo+ to er 0 I was twe$%e now 0 and I said .Ha%e !ou e%er

seen tis boo+, Are !ou tota$$! insane, W! a%e !ou named me 3ais!, E%er!one e$seas a$wa!s said I was a bo! wat's te matterwit !ou,. And se +e&t #r!in" and se

said sometin" about


4/12

e%er!tin" in te fa#e of e%er!tin" tou" it &ersona$$! sames me to sa! it I sti$$ a%e

$o%e for !ou*

Arno$d from 4ei$ Simon's 8ILOI 8L:ES

I was in te $atrine a$one* I s&ent four ours #$eanin" it on m! ands and +nees* It

$oo+ed better tan m! moter's batroom at ome* Ten tese two non0#oms #ome in

one was te #oo+ tat tree0undred0&ound "u! and some oter s$ob wit #i"ar butts inteir mouts and ree+in" from beer * * * Te! #ome in to &ee on$! instead of usin" te

urina$ te! use one of te -ons bot &eein" in te same one ma+in" #ir#$es fi"ure0

ei"ts* Ten te! start to wa$+ out and I sa! .He! I -ust #$eaned tat* P$ease f$us te

-ons*. And te bi" one te #oo+ sa!s to me .:& !ours roo+ie. or some oter rea$$!#$e%er remar+ * * * And I b$o#+ te doorwa! and I sa! .Tere's a &rinted order on te wa$$

si"ned b! (a&tain Landon statin" te re"u$ations tat a$$ fa#i$ities must be f$used after

usin". * * * And I'm re;uestin" tat te! fo$$ow re"u$ations sin#e I was $eft in #ar"e and

to &$ease f$us te fa#i$it! * * * And te bi" one sa!s to me .Su&&ose !ou f$us it 4ew/or+ or at $east

a#t te &art?* I ordered a Lumber-a#+ S$am e)tra am a &ie#e of #arrot #a+e and of#ourse te #$in#er b$a#+ #offee* :nim&ressed wit tis man$iest of brea+fastswi#

wou$d a%e wowed most waitin"0&ersons


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down and strode to te door%i#torious* I ta+e m! #offee b$a#+ for te same reason

"u!s do an!tin" to im&ress women*

Rand! from


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!ou now wi$$ !ou e)&e#t a +iss tomorrow, And if I +iss !ou tomorrow does tat mean

I5$$ a%e to +iss !ou e%er! da! for te rest of our $i%es, 8e#ause I5m not read! for tat

+ind of #ommitment* And I don5t tin+ !ou are eiter* I mean !ou don5t e%en $i+e te#o$or red* So wat does tat mean for us and 7a$entine5s 3a!, And if !ou sa! 7a$entine5s

3a! is not a o$ida! I5m $ea%in" because it is a holiday damn it* And I +now !ou don5t

$i+e me to #urse but I5m in tou# wit m! an"er and m! #a+ras and m! s&iritua$ $ife andafter$ife and &ast $i%es* Wat,B*** And tat's -ust te oter &erson's ba""a"e* Wat

a&&ens wen I add mine into te mi),

Ra! from Eri# O%erm!er's 3ARK RAPT:RE

/ou ne%er +now wats out tere $ur+in' in te dar+ ra&ture* (ambodia* :sed to sa! tatin (ambodia* Seemed a&&ro&riate* /ou ne%er did +now* And te ra&ture was dar+*

7er! dar+ indeed* (Pause) Te! used e$i#o&ters in Souteast Asia* /ou ma! a%e

eard* And some of tese &i$ots* Sow boats* Li+ed to #$i& te to&s of te trees* @$! as

$ow as &ossib$e o%er te ri#e &addies* (urn te surf* Te rea$ ma#o ot sots wou$dbomb down tese dirt roads notin more tan tra#+s trou" te -un"$e si) or so feet off

te "round strafin" e%er!tin" in si"t b$owin" u& water buffa$os a%in" a "reat time*So wat te 7 (d do Kmer Rou"e Patet Lao wate%er te!d strin" a wire a#ross

te road or a ro&e between te trees* @irst tin" in te mornin" ere #omes ot sot

e$$ bent for $eater wom&a wom&a wom&a twin"* Hits tat wire #$i&s is rotors"oes u& in a fire ba$$* Woos* Wi# e%ent I a$wa!s tou"t was te war in a nutse$$*

A$$ it too+ to e%en te &$a!in" fie$d brid"e te "a& in te#no$o"! brin" down a mu$ti0

mi$$ion0do$$ar ma#ine was a &ie#e of wire strun" a#ross te road*

Trent from Artur Ko&it's E43 O@ THE WORL3

4ow I +now were we metB *** It was at our&$a#e our a&artmentB We were $i%in" in te

#it! ten and some friends #ame b! to see our #i$d e'd -ust been bornD ob%ious$! one

of tem brou"t Stonewo, doesn't matter Stone was tere I #an see im in a #ornerlistening as I *** te$$* >Pause? 8ut evil, >Long pause? Our son ad -ust been born* We'd

brou"t im ome* He was wat fi%e da!s o$d I "uess* >Pause? And ten one da! m!

wife went out * * * And I was $eft a$one wit im* And I was %er! e)#ited* 8e#ause it was

te first time I was a$one wit im* And I &i#+ed im u& tis tin! tin" and startedwa$+in" around te $i%in" room* We $i%ed on a i" f$oor o%er$oo+in" te ri%er te

Hudson* Li"t was streamin" inD it was a $o%e$! $i$tin" autumn da! #oo$ beautifu$* And I

$oo+ed down at tis tin! #reature tis tin! tin" and I rea$i2ed* * * >Pause? I rea$i2ed Iad ne%er ad an!one #om&$ete$! in m! &ower beforeB *** And I'd ne%er +nown wat tat

meantB 4e%er fe$t an!tin" remote$! $i+e tat beforeB And I saw I was standin" near a

window* And it was o&en* It was but a few feet awa!* And I tou"t I #ou$d *** drop himoutB And I went towardte window be#ause I #ou$dn't be$ie%e tis tou"t ad #ome into

m! eadwhere had it come from, 4ot one &art of me fe$t an!tin" for tis bo! but

$o%e not one &artB =! wife and I ad &$anned we were bot in $o%e tere was no an"er

no resentment notin" dar+ in me toward im at a$$ no one #ou$d e%er a%e been more

6


7/12

in $o%e wit is #i$d tan I as mu# !es but not more not more and I was tin+in" I

#an trow im out of ereB *** and ten e wi$$ be fa$$in" ten twe$%e fifteen twent!

stories down and as e's fa$$in" I wi$$ be unable to get him back*** And I fe$t a thrillB I@ELT A THRILLB IT WAS THEREB *** And of #ourse I resisted tis* It wasn't ard to do

resistin" wasn't ard *** 8:T I 3I34'T STA/ 8/ THE WI43OWB*** A43 I (LOSE3

ITB I resisted b! mo%in" awa! ba#+ into te room *** And I sat down wit im* >Pause?We$$ tere's not a #an#e I wou$d a%e done it not a #an#eB >Pause? 8ut I #ou$dn't ta+e

a #an#e it was %er! %er! *** sedu#ti%e* >Pause. HE looks at S!"E. he lights come

back a bit. S!"E is sipping his tea# eyes on $E"? If doom #omes*** it wi$$ #ome intat wa!*

(orus from =ar+ Ra%eni$$5s @A:ST IS 3EA3

See a few !ears a"o I #ou$dn't s$ee&* I'd "o to bed and ten I "ot tin+in" about a$$ tis

stuff in te wor$d 00 about te riots and te fi"tin" and a$$ te an"r! &eo&$e and a$$ 00 and

I -ust #ou$dn't s$ee&* And sometimes I'd #r! 00 &art$! be#ause I rea$$! wanted to s$ee& andI was mad tat I #ou$dn't s$ee& but &art$! be#ause of a$$ tose bad tin"s "oin" on* And

m! mom wou$d #ome into m! room and be -ust $i+e so tota$$! frea+ed tat I was #r!in"ni"t after ni"t* .Wat's wron" &oo&s, /ou a%e to te$$ me wat's wron"* Is it te

tea#ers at te s#oo$, Is one of te tea#ers at te s#oo$ doin" bad tin"s to !ou,'

:nti$ e%entua$$! I'm $i+e '4o =om it's not te tea#ers at te s#oo$* I'm #r!in" for tewor$d be#ause te wor$d is su# a bad &$a#e*' And =omma is $i+e 'I +now &oo&s* It's

bad now but it's "ettin" better* It's "onna "et a wo$e $ot better* We're "oin" to $i%e in a

better wor$d*' 'I +now =omma*' And so I &retended to s$ee& and m! mom went off to

bed* And after tat I tau"t m!se$f to #r! in a s&e#ia$ wa! tat meant se wou$dn't earme e%er a"ain* Loo+in" ba#+ now I'm an adu$t I tin+ I used to #r! at ni"t not be#ause

te wor$d was su# a bad &$a#e* We$$ o+a! not -ust be#ause te wor$d is su# a bad

&$a#e* 8ut a$so be#ause I wanted te wor$d to #ome to an end* Li+e Arma"eddon orHe$$fire or Tota$ =e$tdown or some su# was "onna a&&en an! da! and it wou$d be a$$

m! fau$t for wantin" it so mu#* 8ut te wor$d asn't ended* It's "oin" on and on* And I

+ee& $oo+in" for si"ns tat it's "ettin" better $i+e =omma to$d me* 8ut I #an't see tem*So it asn't ended and it's not "ettin" better* It's -ust "oin" on on and on and on* And I

wonder if I sou$d fee$ sometin" about tat* 8ut 00 !ou want te trut, 00 I don't fee$ a

tin"* See I'm te +ind of &erson wo #an stand in te midd$e of an eart;ua+e and I'm

-ust $i+e 'woa neat eart;ua+e'* And I wonder wat made me tat wa!*

Robbie from =i#ae$ We$$er's @ISHI4

It fe$t so ama2in" in te fo"* A undred mi$es an our* I #ou$d'%e ad an a##ident before

I ad a #an#e to off m!se$f* I was sort of s#ared but te s#ared went into -ust &erfe#t&ea#e* Perfe#t #ontro$* And I tou"t O*K* do it*


8/12

#rowd tat doesn't want me around, I mean tis is &ateti#* I'm "oin" trou" tis

in#redib$e &erforman#e and no one's wat#in"* I was &issed off* And ten I tou"t

Wait a minute I'm ta$+in" to m!se$f* I'm out in te fo" on a motor#!#$e tra%e$in" oneundred mi$es an our wit te intention of #ommittin" sui#ide and I'm ta$+in" to m!se$f*

And ten sudden$! it a$$ sto&&edD te %oi#es te intention te tri& te da! e%er!tin"

and I saw sometin" ama2in" inside of me tat was so #$ear !ou #ou$d a$most tou# itwit !our fin"er * * * $ife Sta! a$i%e* I wanted $i+e #ra2! to sta! a$i%e* Wi# means tat

in ba$an#e tere must be sometin" in it* :nder a$$ tat #ra& one sim&$e tin"* Kee& on*

Sta! a$i%e*


9/12

/ou "ot "reed! friends* 7er! "reed!* Harr! !ou +now tat, Seems te! were ta+in' !ou

for a ride* 4e%er "onna #ut !ou in* /ou wo !ou said te! e$d wit su# i" res&e#t

remember, Sou$da seen ow te! $au"ed* (a$$ed !ou a #um& a sa& a s#umba"BIma"ine, Ima"ine tat,B Same "u!s tat !ou said e$d !ou on a ."o$d trone*. So !ou

see nobod!'s #omin' Harr!* S'-ust !ou and me* /ou and me* 8ut I must admit s'been

%er! entertainin"* /ou &ut on a rea$ "ood f$oor sow toni"tD %er! ni#e* 8ut a$$ !ou beendoin' is &u$$in' !our own #ain &a$ '#ause no one's #omin'* 4o one Harr! no one*

=an from (risto&er 3uran"'s LA:HI4 WIL3

Te oter ni"t I dreamt m! fater was inside a ba+ed &otato* Isn't tat stran"e, I was

%er! start$ed to see im tere and I started to be afraid oter &eo&$e wou$d see were m!fater was and ow sma$$ e was so I +e&t tr!in" to #$ose te ba+ed &otato but I "uess

te &otato was ot #ause e'd start to #r! wen I'd sut te ba+ed &otato so ten I didn't

+now wat to do* I tou"t of sendin" te wo$e &$ate ba#+ to te +it#ente$$ te #oo+

tere's a &erson in m! ba+ed &otatobut ten I fe$t su# "ui$t at desertin" m! fater tatI -ust sat tere at te tab$e and #ried* He #ried too* Ten te waiter brou"t dessert wi#

was de%i$'s food #a+e wit mo#a i#in" and I ate tat* Ten I wo+e u& %er! un"r!* Ito$d m! tera&ist about te dream and e said tat te ba+ed &otato re&resented eiter te

womb or were I tried to &ut m! fater durin" te Oedi&a$ #onf$i#t.Wat Oedi&a$

#onf$i#t,. I a$wa!s sa! to im .I won ands down*. And ten m! tera&ist said m!fater #ried be#ause e was una&&! and tat I dreamt about te #a+e be#ause I was

un"r!* I tin+ m! tera&ist is an idiot* =a!be I sou$d -ust a%e "urus* Or find a

nutritionist* 8ut wat I'm doin" now isn't wor+in"*

=an from (risto&er 3uran"'s LA:HI4 WIL3

I used to be a %er! ne"ati%e &erson* 8ut ten I too+ tis &ersona$it! wor+so&

tat tota$$! turned m! $ife around* 4ow wen sometin" bad or ne"ati%e a&&ens I #an

see te &ositi%e* 4ow wen I a%e a rea$$! bad da! or wen someone I tou"t was area$$! "ood friend betra!s me or ma!be wen I'%e been it b! one of tose damn &eo&$e

ridin" bi#!#$es te o&&osite wa! on a one0wa! street so of #ourse one adn't $oo+ed in

tat dire#tion and tere te! are bearin" down on !ou about to +i$$ or maim !ou

an!wa! I $oo+ at an! of tese tin"s and I sa! to m!se$f tis "$ass is not a$f fu$$ it'sa$f em&t!*

4oI said it ba#+wards for#e of abit* Tis "$ass is not a$f em&t! it is a$ffull*

Of #ourse if te! it !ou wit te stu&id bi#!#$e !our "$ass wi$$ not be a$f fu$$ ora$f em&t! it wi$$ be sattered to &ie#es and !ou'$$ be dead in te os&ita$*

8ut rea$$! I'm tr!in" to be &ositi%e tat's wat I'm doin" wit m! $ife tese da!s*

>$eads from a note card.?I was tired of not bein" -o!fu$ and a&&! I was si#+ of m! &ersona$it! and I ad

to #an"e it

>!ff the card back to speaking e*temporaneously.?

9


10/12

Ha$f fu$$ nota$f em&t!* I ad to sa! to m!se$f !ou do not a%e #an#erat $east

not toda!* /ou are not b$ind* /ou are not one of te star%in" #i$dren in India or (ina

or in Afri#a* Loo+ at te sunset $oo+ at te sunrise w! don't !ou en-o! tem for od'ssa+e, And now I do* >lmost as a sidetrack to himself.? E)#e&t if it's #$oud! of #ourse

and !ou #an't see te sun* Or if it's #o$d* Or if it's too ot*

>Hearing his negativity above.?I &robab$! need to ta+e a few more &ersona$it! wor+so&s to #om&$ete te

&ro#ess* It's sti$$ not ;uite witin m! "ras& tis bein" &ositi%e business*

>$eads from the cards again.?8ut I'm ma+in" "reat strides*

eor"e from (onstan#e (on"don's LOSI4 @ATHER'S 8O3/

We$$ S#ott* Kimber$!* @a#t is we'%e it +ind of a sna"* It's no bi" tin" rea$$! bi" tin"

an!wa! I mean e%er!tin" is $e"a$$! "oin" forward* It's a &ersona$ more of a &ersona$

>%lows out some breath# starts over.? 8asi#a$$! it's tis !our :n#$e (e#i$ fee$s %er!stron"$! tat te #artered &$ane #osts too mu# and as de#ided to dri%e !our fater ba#+

in te station wa"on* Himse$f* @rom (anada* He's stored im!our faterunder te#anoe on te roof #arefu$$! wra&&ed and as been ad%ised b! some =ountie u& tere

some "u! wo +nows wat e's ta$+in" abouttat "ame is trans&orted at tis time of

!ear wit no &rob$ems ina!ou +now &reser%ation* So* 4ow I +now tis ma! seema $itt$e bitI meanaa $itt$e a a bit un#omfortab$e* 8ut (anadian $aw on te

trans&ort of !ou +now remains is in#redib$e* In#redib$e* I mean te red ta&e >+ore

than ,eorge can e*press.? 4ow I +now wat !ou ma! bewat's runnin" trou"

wat !ou ma! be tin+in"I mean it's it's 4OT b! an! stret# of te ima"ination idea$*I rea$i2e tat and so does !our :n#$e (e#i$* 8ut e is!ou +now ow e is* He and

!our fater bui$t tis #om&an! from a %er! modestwe$$ !ou +now te stor! of #ourse*

A$$ of tis from tese &rin#i&$es of fru"a$it! and &ra#ti#a$it! wi# I admire so mu#a%e a$wa!s admired in tem bot and in !ou and in Pau$ine And determination* It's

in#redib$e rea$$! (e#i$'s determination is in#redib$e rea$$!* I wis !ou #ou$d ear im on

tis sub-e#t I mean te immediate sub-e#t at and *** tat we're dis#ussin" ere* So watdo !ou tin+, 8efore !ou sa! an!tin" tou" ere are some tin"s to #onsider* It's not

a $on" dri%e and e is dri%in" strai"t trou" so our basi# timetab$e wou$d be te same*

Te oter tin" is we$$ tis is rea$$! te tin" e's on te road !ou see a$read!*

3a%e from S+! 7o"e$'s SHOES

Let me as+ !ou sometin"* 3o !ou e%er wonder ow it is tat &eo&$e "et to"eter, Tis

da! and a"e, /5+now, I meanLoo+ -ust meetin" &eo&$e anyone is ard enou"*

=eetin" womensomeoneof te o&&osite se) is "oin" to be arder ten ri"t, 4owadd to tat te meetin" of someone of te o&&osite se) wo !ou find attra#ti%e* =eetin"

someone of te o&&osite se) wo !ou find attra#ti%e wo finds youattra#ti%e* =eetin"

someone of te o&&osite se) te attra#tion tin" and wo5s sin"$eB And ten tere5s

&o$iti#a$ affi$iation re$i"ion wi# wa! !ou $i+e te toi$et &a&er to ro$$So wit a$$ of

1


11/12

tis I want to +now ow it is tat an!one an!were an!time is a#tua$$! a #ou&$eB How is

tat, Wat are te odds,

8ut !ou +now wat, It a&&ened to me* /ea* I won te $otter!* Ama2in"* 3on5t as+me ow* I don5t remember an! "ood deeds or si"nin" m! sou$ awa!* I -ust wo+e u& one

da! and II fe$tI fee$Am I ma+in" sense, It5s $i+e !ou5re desi"ned for ea# oter*

And $i+em! od $ife isWitout e%en tou#in" !our #est !ou #an a#tua$$! fee$ !oureart beatin"* And !ou5re f$!in" i"* /ou5re en-o!in" e%er!tin"* E%er!tin"B

Waitin" for te subwa!* Te "odawfu$ &ri#e for a #and! bar* /ou5re sin"in" a$on" wit

T7 #ommer#ia$s and sa!in" i to te otdo" %endors* And it5s te "reatest fee$in"* Te"reatestfee$in"*

I5m sorr!* I rea$$! sou$dn5tIt5s -ust a woman I $i+e doesn5t $i+e me*

Kroe"er from a$ant! =i$$er's THE 3REA3E3 WOR3

I was wat#in" some &rotest in Ira; or one of tose #ountries* Te! were burnin"

Ameri#an f$a"s* 3on't tese &eo&$e a%e an!tin" e$se to do, od I ate oter #ountries*Tere are $i+e on$! tree tin"s &eo&$e in oter #ountries do* Te! eiter stand around

&rotestin" te! stand around sootin" ea# oter or te! stand around star%in" to deat*3on't an! of tese &eo&$e a%e' -obs, At $east I o##u&! m!se$f* I a%e a s#edu$e* I

wat# T7* 4obod! in tese oter &$a#es e%er as an!tin" to do* Is tere one &erson in

Iran wo sa!s ./ou +now wat, I #an't "o out and burn :*S* f$a"s toda! be#ause I "otta"o to te offi#e*. 3oes Iran e%en a%e offi#es, Or wat about Afri#a, 3oes an!bod!

e%er sa! ./ou +now wat I #an't stand around and &ose for te :4I(E@ #ameras toda!

be#ause I'm a dentist and I a%e a&&ointments toda!*. /ou wou$d tin+ one &erson in one

of tose #ountries wou$d #ome u& wit te bri$$iant idea of bu!in" a bui$din" and o&enin"a store*

(ar$ie from Eri# 8er$in's THE LI4E THAT PI(KE3 :P 1 8A8ES >A43 HOW IT

(A4 WORK @OR /O:?

It's a verysma$$ wor$d* -erysma$$* I ran into some "ir$ before se #omes u& to me $i+e

we're te o$dest of friends* Her name's


12/12

s&end te da! a"oni2in" o%er it* 8ut te "ir$s I "et tese &rett! "ir$s wo are -ust so

a&&! to see me and I'm a&&! to see tem too and I'd be e%en a&&ier if I +new wo

te! a#tua$$! wereB 8ut !ou +now !ou #an't as+ ri"t, /ou #an't te$$ some "ir$ !oudon't +now wo se is se'$$ be insu$ted* Ri"t, Ri"t, See I'$$ &ro%e it wo te e#+

are !ou,

IS THERE LI@E A@TER HIH S(HOOL b!

Documents

Monologues (Male) 2013