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TRANSCRIPT Please note: this is a direct transcript from the audio course. Errors in grammar and misspellings are to be expected. Please enjoy the easy access to the cutting edge content of this audio as well as the tapping scripts that are right at your fingers tips!

Margaret: Yes, to have that much sadness that you're carrying around, that's going to be really tiring and not be very energizing. Participant: Yes, it's exhausting. Margaret: Your battle with the world is going to be very different from the Charismatic Leader. The battle for you is "You abandoned me, and that's it. I'm wounded forever." To really honor, voice, and release a lot of that is really powerful. For the Emotional Intelligence Specialist, the work for you—because we're always looking to own some of our opposite quality—is to own your inner Knowledgeable Achiever / Rule Keeper, the part of you that can put more of a boundary down and say, "Okay, I'm a person who likes to merge and feel loved, give love, and have that be a flow, but there's a time for me to actually have a more solid boundary between my needs and other people's so I can ask for my needs to be met." Often, Emotional Intelligence Specialists are trying to be Knowledgeable Achievers, and that doesn't work because they're denying who they are. But when we honor who we are, we get to own that quality. It's just like for a Team Player—they need to own a little bit of their inner Enforcer to honor themselves instead of always honoring other people first. I really like that you changed the words and let yourself have your feelings that were different than what maybe the majority of the group was in at the time of the call. You always want to give yourself permission to do that.

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Participant: I had a pretty intense week as well. It was really good. I actually feel a lot more compassion towards myself. I realized that I really shut down my second chakra when I was younger as a way to protect myself because I think I have a very strong Emotional Intelligence Specialist. All I want to do is really connect with people and connect to the world, and it just became too painful to keep that open. So I learnt to shut that down and get my needs met, which was to feel needed and to feel wanted and loved, by going up into my head and becoming the best at everything that I could possibly do. That also meant, though, that I never actually really received what I wanted, and I never really was able to connect with people in the way that I wanted to because it just wasn't on the same level. I really noticed that of all the recurrent patterns in my life, particularly money and relationships, were all based around just shutting down that power center, which is me. I think a lot comes from my second chakra, which meant that I was never open to receiving, so I never did. Every time I went into a work situation or into a relationship, I wasn't in my power and I really felt more alone in those times and less powerful until those situations pushed me into a point where I wanted to say, "Eff this!" I would actually step back into my power to say, "No, I'm not putting up with this any longer," and then moved out of it. I definitely realize that I was manifesting those situations continually to try to bring myself back into my power. Margaret: We can achieve a lot of things, and when we get the recognition, it won't feel as good. Just as you said, as a child, we want to be needed and wanted and loved and seen for us and for the quality that we have. If that quality is not important in our family or seen as valuable, then we can do other things and get Medals of Honor, and we'll be like, "It just still doesn't feel like what I wanted." Participant:

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No, and it's hard work, and I don't want to do it. Margaret: Then you're just like, "Now, I've just got to do it again," to almost get a little more of the itch scratched. Participant: I know that it was definitely that part of me saying, "I'm going to prove to you how good I am. I'm going to prove to you that I'm worth it," with that kind of mentality, and that was really toward, I'm pretty sure, my family. "I'm going to prove that I deserve this attention that I'm trying to demand and you're not giving me." Now, at this point in my life, I realize that I make everything as hard as it could be to try to prove that I can succeed in the hardest of situations. I'm at this point now where I'm just like, "No, I'm over that. I do not want to do that anymore." Margaret: It's kind of like, "I can do that if I need to because I know I have that strength, but what do I really want to manifest?" It's a caution to everybody. I've worked with people at very advanced ages who have literally been in battle with their family their entire life trying to prove something, trying to finally get their family to accept them for who they are, validate them for who they are, and see them for who they are. It really does a number on their power because all of their focus is back on their tribe of origin. We get to go and manifest out in the world and create our own new tribe, so if all of our energy is still in argument with our tribe of origin, trying to prove things, we spend our life in the "proving zone." Participant: I've been having a really intense week and am feeling very overwhelmed and anxious—lots and lots of anxiety. It's just really hard, and I feel really stuck right now. Margaret:

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Yes, so you're really feeling the backlash. For you, the backlash, if it's anxiety, it's the part of you that's insisting, "No way, this is not safe for you." You're not safe. If it's triggering anxiety, then it's that protection part. "This is not safe. You are totally in danger." Something about saying, "I'm powerful," triggers the anxiety for you. What I would do is alternate with tapping and voice that. Voice it like it's true. Sometimes I like to say, "There's a part of me that believes …" and then I will voice that I am not safe, that this is not safe, that I shouldn't take another step, and that I need to stay in the old way. Participant: I've been doing the tapping, and it helps in the moment I'm doing it, but then it really comes back quite quickly. Margaret: Then try switching to some more positive words. "The truth is, I'm in the here and now, and I'm safe." Does it get to the point where you feel like your body is shaking? Participant: No, not quite that much, but it feels like I have to close down in order to protect myself because I feel like I'm going to break apart, that I can't handle anything, and if anybody asks anything of me, I'm going to be drained, so I notice how closed down I'm being lately. Margaret: It's a vulnerability fear at the second chakra that says, "If I really let myself feel …"—this is often common for people who have a strong Emotional Intelligence Specialist quality or for Charismatic Leaders who have that strong quality—"…and if I let it in, it's just going to be a tidal wave. It's going to overwhelm me and I am going to be completely drained. It'll be a never-ending onslaught." It's as if, once you open, you can never set that boundary again.

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It might feel like it's going to come from the outside, but what you're really feeling is your own resistance to your own feelings—the volume, the volcano, or the tidal wave of processing your own feelings and emotions. It's like, "If I start feeling that, it's going to be a never-ending fountain of too much feeling." Rhys always says, "There's nothing happening that's not in your field." So when we're worried about being overwhelmed, it's always worry about the overwhelming of our own feelings. But there are some NLP-type things that we can do to help manage some of that for you. Here's what I want us to do to jump into the exercise. I talked a lot last week about the second chakra. The second chakra is really where we develop our self-image. If we've just come up to the second chakra, then we look at our body—our first chakra—and our sensations and feelings about who we are. There's no thought process yet. Based on the way that we merge, interact, and wrestle with the world at the second chakra, we develop our self-image based on how valuable what we've got going on measures against the rest of the world. We almost do this comparison: "With this body and these feelings and this nervous system, what kind of value do I have in the world?" Based on that, we create a self-image. That's why, when we're working with the second chakra, just like in the "Bringing Sexy Back" work, for some people, it seems like, "It seems so lopsided. We're just talking about our physical appearance, our body, and how sexy we feel." But no one has any issues with their valuation based on their sixth-chakra credentials, training, and education. Those are set by your company, by society, and by payment standards, so we don't really have a lot of conflicts or issues with our valuation up there. "Well, I've got this degree, I went to this training program, it's worth this much, I've got this education, and I've done this position." So that's not usually where our issues are. It's really down in this first- and second-chakra area. So what I want everyone to do is to come back, just like you did in "Bringing Sexy Back," and put yourself in front of a mirror. I want you to have on something fabulous, something that makes you feel great. I want to test three different phrases because some of them will relate more for the Charismatic Leader, and some of them will relate more for the Emotional Intelligence Specialist.

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First, I want you to rate on a scale of 1-10: "I'm sexy. I am just sexy!" in all senses of that word, all definitions, and all feelings. When we say, "I feel sexy," there's a lot in that word. It doesn't just necessarily mean a super-model body. Let's see how high that one is. Now I want you to try this one, particularly for the Charismatic Leader / Knowledgeable Achievers: "I'm a rock star. I'm a frickin' rock star!" See on a scale of 1-10 how true that is. Third, instead of "rock star," this one will feel truer if we have a really strong Emotional Intelligence Specialist quality. Both of these might feel true for you, or this one might feel more true. Looking in the mirror, say: "I am a goddess. I'm a goddess!" That could be Aphrodite, the goddess of love, or it could be any kind of goddess, but it's the goddess quality. Just see where you are on a scale of 1-10 for that. It makes me happy just to say these expressions! Give me some quick feedback. Poll Results What about on the first one, "I'm sexy"? Where is everybody? • 6 • 3 • 9 • 3 • 5 • 5 What about "rock star"? • 2 • 8 • 7 • 4 What about "goddess"? • 10 • 4

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• 7 • 9 • 8 We've definitely got some people with high numbers, which is great, and that's often a great result of doing the "Bringing Sexy Back" program. We're going to do some tapping, and I'm still going to use negative words because we have some people down in the 2's, 3's and 4's. Don't worry. The negative words aren't going to hurt you if you feel great already. It's just going to make you feel better. It's weird how that happens. Tapping through the points: Tapping Session 1 There I am I'm okay, but I'm not fabulous I'm not totally sexy Not a goddess Not really a rock star I wish I could be But there are so many things wrong Ick! What about this thing? I hate that about me I hate that about my body There are gross things about me Ugly things Human things Not super-model–like at all There are things about me I don't like And other people don't like them either Society agrees with me

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I'm not really that valuable Not really that special Who do I think I am saying I'm a rock star? This body This energy This sex appeal This beauty It's just not that great It's not the top It's not super model It's not Jennifer Aniston or Angelina Jolie I am so not getting Brad Pitt I'm not a rock star I don't deserve to feel goddess And I refuse to own that quality I don't deserve it Not good enough Not enough value Just not valuable enough When I add up all these flaws I'm not frickin' special.

~~~ Take a nice, deep breath. I just want you to go to the picture again and re-rate the "I'm sexy," and see where you are—it's kind of weird how the number will often go up just from tapping on negatives—"I'm a rock star" and "I'm a goddess."

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It's okay if your numbers haven't come up much because we're going to do another process there, whether your numbers are high or not. I want you to keep your eyes closed. Picture yourself standing there in front of that mirror, wherever your numbers are, and say those things again. Imagine that there you are, saying them out loud anyway, even if they only feel true at a 3, 4, or 5. You're saying, "I'm a rock star! I'm sexy! I'm a goddess!" Now I want you to put someone in the picture standing there watching you and it's the person who has wounded you most around your power. This is what they're saying to you: "No, you're not! You're a loser!" I just want you to feel that. What happens to you? What happened in your body? If it feels intense, you can start tapping. But I want you to watch yourself in this picture. If you're feeling scared or upset, I want you to somehow bring up from the earth below your feet some beautiful red and orange energy, blasting up into your body from somewhere deep in the earth. I want you to see that energy shoot right into your arms, and I want you to run at that person and push them back and say, "No! Fuck you!" I'm going to lead you through some tapping for this, just tapping through any of the points: Tapping Session 2 No! No! NO! Fuck you! You don't define me I define me Fuck you! You don't define me anymore! I'm shoving you back Pushing you back Pushing my boundary This is my space This is who I am

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No! I'm pushing you back With my power My energy My space I claim this space on the Earth This is my energy field My soul My power My gifts I couldn't push you back with my arms or my words But I'm all grown up now And I'm pushing you back No! I'm handing you back your opinion Your wounds Your programming Your negative intent I'm handing it back It's leaving my energy field No! This is my line This is where I am And I'm pushing you back.

~~~ Take a nice, deep breath.

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This is why we sometimes recommend the punching bag. It's pretty intense, right? I just want you to look at the picture, see what you see there, and give me some feedback on that. If it's bringing up a lot of emotion or intensity, just keep tapping. Participant: I'm feeling pretty good after that "Bringing Sexy Back," as I mentioned before. When we were doing this, you had this image of this other person. It turned into me! It was like my Enforcer. That was it. Then all of a sudden, that Enforcer started to take on different faces, primarily the women in my family, like my mother, my grandmother, my aunt, and people like that.

I've often dreamt that these people come at me and I very powerfully push them back, so that's what it felt like, meaning I actually have dreams when I'm sleeping. That's what this felt like. It felt like I have that same kind of power that I have in my dreams. I push so hard, they just disappear almost. But it was definitely me at the beginning, another part of me. Margaret: You're seeing all the feminine Enforcers. It's the feminine side of the Enforcers because their specific energy disempowers you. Participant: Yes, and at one point, the Catholic Church came up, but it was not as strong as the female voices of the women. Margaret: If the disempowerment is around the role of women, the role of women is part of your first-chakra beliefs and programming that you're in battle with, so you can put a face on that. But what you're really doing is pushing back and saying no to the paradigm. It's like a wall almost. There are people that represent that, but you're shoving back a wall. Participant:

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Yes, exactly. I think it was so powerful this time because I had done all that work. I spent hours doing the "Bringing Sexy Back" thing because I really wanted to. I get a little obsessive. I wanted to really break through these things, and so having come in with that preparation behind me seems to have really empowered me to understand this. I wanted to put a face on it, but I couldn't see anybody—it was just me. Then all of a sudden, it opened up into different people. Margaret: That's why I make sure everyone has processed that first because it would be way too much to try to do this all for the first time if you were just doing the "Bringing Sexy Back." Participant: I started out with a 5, 2, and 7 for the "sexy, rock star, goddess." Negative tapping did allow it to go up a little bit. It was kind of fun because a boa came around my neck that helped raise all the numbers. But then this last part was so powerful because it was my ex-husband that I was feeling but realizing how close my inner critic is with my ex-husband. He was my ex-husband from 17 years ago, so it's a long time. It felt so powerful to be pushing him back, pushing those words and thoughts. Yet the part I was curious about was that even though I felt like I was in my power and trying to connect with the lion in me almost roaring at him, I still felt the tightness in my throat. It came up and then it weakened a little bit, but there's still something I feel there just about even expressing it to myself. Margaret: Keep working with it. This isn't an easy thing. But if we don't express it and punch it out on a punching bag or something, it's running in us. This is what's happening inside because every time we remember or somebody else reminds us of that person, we go into this whole thing inside. "I want to battle it, but I can't battle it. But I want to push back." We'll keep playing it out with other people. Participant:

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It feels like it's me, though, more than other people. It feels like it's my inner critic that keeps him alive, not his specific criticisms of me, but it's a part of me. Margaret: It's common if we have a strong inner critic that we'll see images of ourselves and other people. But I want you to think about: before your husband, who would it be? See if you can put one of your parents there because this started somewhere. Participant: I actually had two people come into the room. It started off as just my sister, and then my brother was there as well. Then when I did that visualization of pushing them back, it really went to my brother, and he got really hurt. Something like his heart or intestines came out of his body. He was really hurt, and I started to feel sick. I could feel it in my body, "Oh, my God, I've hurt him!" But my sister was there in the shadows, just going, "See? You're out of control! You're immature! You're a loser!" and that kind of thing. Margaret: You put a Rule Keeper in the picture to keep you accountable, and there were a lot of consequences right away. It's kind of interesting because in real life, if you really went wild and shoved somebody back and they said, "What?!" that would be out of control. But we're doing this exercise in our mind, and even there, you made sure you put in a lot of consequences for yourself. There are two things in there. One side of that is that you really are a caring, compassionate person. You're going to have this conscious quality that says, "Hey, that would hurt somebody." Participant: And I often hurt myself so that they don't get hurt. Margaret:

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It's interesting that you put a governor right in your visualization. You didn't just get to have it. It was like, "You're out of control!" There's your inner critic. When we look at the shadow work, we do project it onto other people, and it is really about us and all the stuff that's our own inner critic. You want to work with both sides of that. For you to push back, even in your mind, it will physically hurt other people and the Rule Keeper will be right there saying, "You're losing control." So you think, "It's not okay for me to push back ever." Participant: It felt like the wounded part of me, which was there behind, was really so vulnerable, there was like a disconnect. The angry part just felt so much hate and rage, and yet it didn't feel real. It didn't feel like it was really going to work because I had done that stuff before, and here she still is. That's what my mind was saying. Margaret: You've used anger before, but probably in more of a protective way. What we want to get at here—even though we're making the picture over the top—is the ability in the present moment to push back and set a boundary. Not over-attack because of a story we have from the past, but to deal with what's happening in the present moment and actually push back and set a boundary so that we can develop confidence in ourselves in doing that without having to go to a rage story. For instance, Rhys has an exercise in the school where people have to fight their way out of a corner. Literally, two people back you into a corner with pads, and you have to fight your way out. Now, some people can only bring their energy up if they remember a past situation where they were really, really angry and then pretend that that person is there and then fight against that—versus being in the present moment and saying, "No, you're right in front of me. Someone is pushing me and I'm pushing back." It's showing you how much you're still in battle with her. There's a lot of really good tapping for you to do to exhaust that.

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It's more of a projection for you. It doesn't even feel like a real part of you. So what I would ask you to do is to take a look at your picture again right now. I want you to see the vulnerable part of you—just as afraid and weak—and I want you to see this projected angry part. Take that vulnerable part of you and bring up some red-orange energy into her so that she has enough energy to raise one hand and say, "Stop. I don't like this." See if she can do that. Participant: Yes, she can. Margaret: It's different because she's doing it authentically. We have to build up your confidence in yourself that you can do that without going to a crazy, enraged person. "It's me. In this moment, it's just me, and I'm saying that's not okay with me." It's harder, actually. We're used to letting ourselves get so overwhelmed that now we have a reason to rip someone's head off. This is what the People Pleasers and "poor me's" do. They build up and build up, and then they tell the person off. Often, the person thinks, "Oh, my God! I had no idea!" Even if they were being a total asshole, they did not see it coming. I want everyone to come back to the image of themselves and see yourself there. You just pushed back, and you used some anger. I want you to imagine that now there is a big space—you pushed and you said, "I claim this space. This is my boundary. This is where I stand. I choose, and I don't choose to hear that. I don't choose that thought." I want you to use some energetic space around you. How do you look now in your power? How does your power feel now that you've pushed back once? What I want you to let happen is to let yourself feel the power, feel where you are as far as feeling like a rock star or goddess-like, and from that place, look over at that person. Notice that you might have some compassion for them. They might seem less important, even if there's more work to do around that person.

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Even when we have compassion, even when we have understanding about somebody else and their wounds and problems, even when we have a positive compassion and don't want to hurt anybody, we still claim our space and our boundaries. That's our work to do. I want you to allow your mind to give you a gift right now of an archetype. I want you to allow a power archetype to appear. It may be one of the Greek gods or goddesses or an archetype that you're familiar with from any mythology or any religion. Just let that archetype be there with you. Let him or her appear—this archetype that represents your power to say, "No, I don't choose that," and to push back. Just see what they look like. See what the qualities of that archetype are. Are they powerful? Are they beautiful? Is it a goddess? Notice how you feel standing there with that archetype. I want you to notice two or three really particular attributes about this archetype that's now there with you—just positive attributes about them. Just note them down because they're important. We're going to do a little round of tapping, and then I want to get some feedback. Tapping through the points: Tapping Session 3 There I am Standing in my power With this powerful archetype next to me I'm proud of myself I've pushed back I've said no to someone or something I don't want I've pushed them back And I've pushed back the battle Because I've been in battle with them

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As I push them back and see that I can create space around me And my right to be here I get to come out of battle and be I get to see that I have the power To claim my space My value My deserving to be here And this power is now standing with me As an incredible archetype An archetype of power and strength Beauty and worth I honor this powerful archetype My mind is showing me an aspect of my own power My ability to push back Stake the ground if I need to Set a boundary And create space around me Around my thoughts, my feelings, my heart Space full of peace Space that I fill with me Space that lets me come out of battle Space that lets this powerful archetype fill me Reminding me of my resource It's there when I need it I'm open to letting this teach me to believe in myself Trust in myself Know that I can push back And stand in my own space Even under the harshest conditions.

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~~~

Take a nice, deep breath. Now that we did the tapping, I want you to see the archetype again. Sometimes the archetype, the image that you're seeing, might be stronger or clearer. Notice those attributes that you are connecting to. See if they're stronger or fuller. This is an incredibly important process to practice, to know, to start trusting yourself. I said, "Under the harshest of conditions," because I made it kind of harsh. Someone stepping up when you feel good and shouting at you, "No, you're not! You're a loser!" that's harsh. I want you to notice how much calmer you can be in that space, even when we used anger and we pushed back physically, which is something you couldn't really do as a child. Once you create that space, you can come back to homeostasis, which is how the fight-or-flight is supposed to operate. You fight, push back, get safe, and come back to homeostasis. Participant: I kind of switched between two archetypes as you were speaking, depending on the words that you were using. My main one was the goddess, who was open-minded and compassionate and had no anger towards my brother or sister or anything. It was just this beautiful peace. But when you were talking about having that power to say no, I was a queen and had a crown on, and I was rigid and I didn't give a shit if you got hurt or anything. But I could make the decision, and it was bang-bang right or wrong. I kept flicking between the two images of me as a queen and me as a goddess. Margaret: Your goddess quality is a quality that you like to live in—very compassionate—and there's really no anger needed. But when the queen has to do something, the queen acts.

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Participant: I didn't like her. She was rigid. Those qualities that I guess I don't like about my goddess, it feels like my critic and how I judge my sister sometimes in being really tight and rigid, no fuss, and narrow-minded. Margaret: I want you to tap a little bit on the judgment. But what's the gift in that? Does a queen have to be decisive? Does a queen have to fire people from her kingdom sometimes? When we work in business and we have huge, lofty goals, we have to be open to owning these qualities of ourselves. Otherwise, if you try to only be in business from the goddess, there are going to be issues. There are times when I have to go into Rule Keeper. I know I'm going there, and I have to go there because I'm going there consciously—it's not a defense—but I need to turn that on to deal with certain situations where it's not about negotiating anymore. It's like, "This is done. This did not meet my expectations, and this is the consequence." You got to see two. One you're more comfortable with. One you're not. It's really about the consciousness of owning that "that is a resource that I have." The queen will come out if she needs to. Participant: I think it's because I'm kind of afraid of that part because I hurt myself a lot when I'm in that person. There are no excuses—it's just black or white and "chop your head off." Margaret: It has come out in your shadow and is totally directed at you. Be conscious of that queen—"Off with their head!"—and choose it when you need it. Is the queen held to an incredibly high standard? Yes. This is the part of you that's going to hold you to a really high standard. And a queen has a sense of entitlement, so there's a part of you that says, "I am entitled to be the decision maker here. That is my divine right." When you have Charismatic Leader, you're going to have some of that energy.

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If you do the Caroline Myss archetype work, the Queen is not one of my archetypes—I have different archetypes around that—but I know a lot of people who have the Queen archetype. It's a really cool one. You can read in Caroline Myss' archetypes—I'm sure you can read it on one of the websites—what the Queen energy is, and they'll have the dark side and the light side. Is there anybody else? How does your archetype look? How do you look in this picture after pushing back really hard? Participant: I started feeling very peaceful, and then I saw this giant oak tree with roots going down into the ground. Then I saw three images pop up. I saw Athena, Isis, and Aphrodite. My words were "wisdom, compassion, power, and beauty." It was almost like they were coming to sort of bow at this tree. I cannot explain that, other than that was the image. I feel very rooted. That's the only way that I can describe that. I feel rooted. I was observing each one as they morphed from one into another. Athena popped up. She had her sword and she had wisdom. Then I saw Isis, and she had compassion and power—she was a queen. Then Aphrodite was about beauty. She was seductive but not harmful, just powerful. Margaret: The reason why I had you write down the quality is that the qualities are your "light shadow." We look a lot in this program at our shadow side, the "dark side," that we deny in ourselves or loathe in ourselves. When you look at these archetypes and their qualities, you're looking at your light shadow. That's like your denied light. So when you look at those qualities that you wrote down for the archetype, I want you to look at that and say, "That's also me. I'm the one that has wisdom, compassion, and beauty." Participant: What's the whole "tree" thing? Is that part of this feeling grounded or rooted?

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Margaret: It's really cool that your mind showed you that. It's like an image of your whole energy system. Trees are like the first chakra, strong, rooted, and grounded. It's supposed to be really powerful for you, and that's probably a new realization because you've spent a lot of time up and out of it. Participant: Yes, I was one of the leaves! Margaret: That's the real you. So it would be cool to see the qualities of that oak tree. When we do this work, if I say, "What are the great qualities of you?" people have a hard time with that. But when we describe the qualities from the image, we get a clearer picture of our denied light because it's often "I would have never described myself that way!" So now you can say, "I'm an oak tree. That's actually the truth of me. That's how grounded and powerful I am." Participant: Right at this moment, I'm just sort of watching things, more like an observer and very grounded—not any tension or feeling like I have to react to anything. Margaret: This is a very good feeling to anchor and remember. When shit happens and we're getting it from all sides, we want to have this feeling anchored that we can come back to. This is you feeling you, which we often don't get to feel too much. It's like, "This is how I feel when I feel grounded, calm, and centered. This is the real me," so that when life is happening, you have a space to come back to. Probably for you, if you closed your eyes and pictured that oak tree, it would start to bring you back to this feeling.

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What I like to do is use some of the Crystal Bowl music, like "Touching Your Soul" or the "Life Purpose" one. For me, those are really great. The Crystal Bowls will help me come back to that feeling when I feel far away from it. "My life is spinning out of control, and I don't know who I am!" The Crystal Bowls will help me come back to that moment because it's a specific quality for me. I now know when I'm in my power—there are all sorts of different ways we can feel in our power—but I know what it's like for me because I feel a sense of excitement, enthusiasm, and kick-ass-ery. Participant: Exactly, that's it! It's peaceful, but it's kind of like that tiger sitting there, being really aware of what's around it—not because it's going to do anything evil or hurt anything—but because it's an animal and it has to be in its senses. Margaret: This is what's really cool about this. Who you are is a feeling. When you have this moment when you're feeling something really great, it's so important to anchor the moment and come back to it again and again. The upside that it gives you is really feeling who you are and in this moment thinking, "I know who I am right now." For me, it's not like, "I finally know who I am." It's more like, "I don't even care who I am. I'm just friggin' bursting into the world." Say I go to some event where my goal is to build my business or to be seen so that I can get more opportunity. I'm working in my business or I'm going to go and speak. I can sit there for a few minutes and bring on this feeling, let it arrive in my belly—almost for me sometimes, it feels a little butterfly-ish—and I swear to God, people can tell. They can tell! They can feel it in my vibe. When someone is sitting there being powerfully present as themselves—and that's what you're feeling right now—people around you get a healing just from stepping into the room. Participant:

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Yes, I understand what you're saying. It does feel a little like butterflies—it's anticipation, but not in a negative way, just in an excitement kind of way. Margaret: Yes, it's like, "This is how it feels for me, so I can return to this feeling," and then feel the difference and how separated you are from that feeling when shit is happening. The goal is—and stuff is always going to happen in our life—that "I can come back to that place. I don't lose this place forever or only feel it once a year. I can come back to this feeling and this place, and then I know I'm centered." Participant: I had a lion. It was licking my face and being very loving, and it was wonderful. Margaret: Wow, so a loving lion! There's nothing about a lion that isn't terrifyingly powerful. Even when it's loving, it's still a lion. That's a really great image for you because lions love their baby cubs and hug them and are tender and loving. They can also defend their baby cub if they need to. Often, they don't need to. They just roar. What does it feel like in your body being with that lion? Participant: Much better—a sense of calm and that sense of connectedness. Margaret: How do you look in the picture with the lion there as far as being able to say, "No, this is my space"? Participant:

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There's a Tarot card—I'm not sure which one it is—where it's a goddess and she's got the lion beside her, I think. She's got her hand up, and there's a bird on the other hand. That's the part that's me, the other part. Margaret: I want you to play with that a little bit more. Really anchor this feeling and come back to it on purpose. This is who you are when you feel safe and calm. Participant: When I was doing this, it was Archangel Michael that was the archetype that came to mind. He felt very strong. It's interesting you used the word "calm" because before, I was thinking "unemotional," and I was feeling kind of sick to my stomach. It was almost like it didn't feel because he wasn't feeling, and I was feeling sick, so it felt powerful but not wonderful like the lion or the goddess. Margaret: What does Archangel Michael mean to you? What would you describe Archangel Michael as? Participant: I see him as standing steadfast with a sword in his hand, so a warrior is what comes to mind. Margaret: Seeing him standing there as a warrior, knowing that this is your masculine Enforcer that you're seeing, what's the feeling in your stomach? You said it feels kind of sick? Participant: Yes. Margaret: What would that feeling in your stomach say if it could speak?

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Participant: It's just a real discomfort. I can't find words, but it's churning and just feels yucky. Margaret: When you feel nausea down in your stomach, it's every time you swallow down this part of you. Participant: I remember there was something about nausea. In other words, it's that I've swallowed down this warrior? Margaret: It's the masculine quality of your Enforcer. You made him an angel, which gave it a little bit of some spirituality—"At least, let's put some wings on him!"—because there's probably some resistance in there. They appear the way they appear. I'm just wondering what would happen if you took his wings off in the picture and he was no longer an angel, and he was just a pretty strong warrior. Would that make the feeling worse? Participant: In my stomach, you mean? Margaret: Yes. Participant: Actually, he didn't have wings to begin with. Margaret:

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Okay, you've turned him into an angel. "Maybe we'll just make him an angel! That's not so bad!" You're feeling what's happening in your second chakra. It's reacting to the energy there. The way I read that is when you can feel your stomach churning like that and it's very uncomfortable, you've really made a decision to not carry that quality at all. It's so far from you on a regular basis. Remember, it doesn't mean that you need to turn yourself into a masculine warrior. It means that whether you want to accept it or not, this is a resource for you. If somebody were to back you into a corner, whether it was with their words or physically, as peace-loving as we can be, this is the part that would come out. Give me some attributes of this warrior. Participant: The words that came were "strong" and "steadfast"—"confident" was the most positive one—and then "brave." The one that was curious to me was "unemotional" because I think of myself as being too emotional at times. So I guess it is a resource, in a way, to be unemotional, but I didn't like him being unemotional. Margaret: Just like with the queen, what's the gift in being able to sometimes be not emotional? Participant: Sometimes you need that, yes. Margaret: Yes, not compassionate. If I could have turned off my compassion, I wouldn't have stuck with my marriage for eight years. I would have been in it for two. But there was a vow in me to never ever let anyone suffer under any circumstances. So that meant I could never say no. All my ex would have to do

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was show me a big "poor me" suffering show, and I would be like, "Now I can't leave," because I could not be uncompassionate or unemotional. Participant: That sounds familiar. And I like that you're putting compassion with emotion because I was thinking, "Yes, I'm way too emotional, but I like my compassion." But it's just that I can't live in it all the time. Margaret: Yes, there are times in our life and in our business when we have to make decisions from that masculine side of us, from the T. Harv Eker side of us. "Let me own some of that because I might need some of that in my business sometimes." When it's not that comfortable for you, then I want you to work with it more. Really do some tapping about "Even though there is an angel or maybe a devil warrior in me that's strong, male, masculine, confident, I vowed not to have this part." Normally, I would say to you, "What would it feel like if that archetype stepped right into your body?" And if it feels kind of nauseating looking at him, it might not feel that great to have him step in. Participant: Yes, I'm feeling some nausea. So the goal, though, is to work until it does feel comfortable? Margaret: In the way we do our shadow work, you could look at that as a shadow, and what you could do is tap and say, "That is not me. I reject it. I don't want anything to do with it. I reject you. I don't want you. Maybe if you're an angel, I'll take some, but everything else, I don't have this masculine quality. But if I get pushed into a corner, I will only be victimized. I will not fight ever." Just tap on it like that, and keep checking in with it because it's really the mind that refuses the second-chakra quality.

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Participant: I admire those things. I think, "Isn't that great he's got them?" It's not that I am rejecting. It's more like I wish I had them, but they're not there. Margaret: You're rejecting that it's part of you. It's like, "That's not part of me. I can admire that from afar, but it's not me." Participant: So is that what I tap on, even though I feel like it's not me? Margaret: I would tap really specifically, saying, "That is not me. Do not say that's me. I do not have that kind of strength. I do not have that kind of confidence. I do not have any masculine." That will break it faster. You're not negotiating it with the refusal. You're voicing the refusal. Then you can switch and say, "The truth is, there is an angry warrior locked in my second chakra." Resisting against it and trying to push that down is what makes that discomfort. Again, it's not about turning you into someone you're not. It's about knowing that this is a quality that you have. Maybe it's a tiny, little twelfth. But when you own it, you can't pretend that "I don't have any of that." It's that "I do have some warrior in me that is strong, brave, and can choose not to be emotional." Participant: Wow, I'm almost getting tears when you say that. Okay, so there's a part of me that knows it, but I need to tap on it, getting more of me to know it. Margaret:

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It's really owning and loving all these pieces of us. I want you to look at that and say, "What if that's part of me? What if that is a piece of me?" because your mind painted you a picture of your archetype, and there you have it. The first time I did this work, it was a werewolf, and I was like, "Nice! I'm supposed to be fine with a horrible werewolf! Great! Couldn't I get Athena? No! Werewolf!" What are you seeing there? How are those positive qualities hitting you? Is it shocking because the qualities are different from what you might expect? Again, the qualities are your light shadow. They're the pieces of you that are in your light that you deny as opposed to the dark that we sometimes deny. These are pieces of you from your light that you deny. We're going to finish up with another round and just see how this whole thing settles in. Tapping through the points: Tapping Session 4 Here I am with my archetype It's a little strange Very different from me Maybe a little scary Definitely intriguing And it's hard to wrap my head around That is part of me That this lives in my second chakra That I am this It's weird to say that I am this It's not all of me It's a piece of me Maybe a piece of the 12

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If Caroline Myss is right I am many people in one, truth be told And I shift throughout my day effortlessly already From mom to lover to employee To smart to dumb to angry to sad I am incredibly multidimensional I have some dark sides And I have some light sides This is part of my light The qualities in this archetype I now take seriously They're not just words on a page They are me Maybe I've never embodied them fully Maybe I've tried to prove they were me But right now I just own and honor them These define me In my core In my energy system These are qualities of me Qualities of my light Qualities of my power! The life in me that screams, "I want to live!" I want to live! And living by other people's rules, judgments, wounds Is not living Playing somebody else is not living This is the archetype in me that reminds me I'm fighting to be me

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I have the right to be me I want to live! And that means I want to be me I'm sick of being half alive This is my archetype that's there for me when I need to say, "No, this is where I define myself, my boundaries, my energy, my beautiful thoughts!" This is the archetype that reminds me That I have the right and the power to stand in this space And be fully alive Just knowing I have that power Takes me out of battle Just knowing and affirming that I have the right Takes me out of proving My second-chakra energy is pure, life-force energy And it screams on a daily basis, "I want to live!" "I want to feel!" "I want to be!" It's awesome … and I'm listening And whenever I need it, this archetype will return to me And remind me it's there when I need it It can step into my body Step into my field Help me to speak and create a larger energetic boundary That people feel Ninety percent of my battles drop away Because it's in my field I own this space And if I need to speak or push back

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I trust and believe that I can do it I can do it!

~~~ Take a nice, deep breath. Homework Your homework is about really working with this archetype. You can look it up online and do more research about it. It's interesting to feel that through. Spend a little more time considering this archetype and what it means for you, what it gives you, and the gifts that it has—the gifts that you may be surprised are your gifts from this light shadow. The other piece of the homework is that I want you to see in your life where you need to set an energetic boundary or a verbal boundary, whether it's you doing the tapping and making the decision or whether you say to somebody, "This doesn't really work for me," or you steer a conversation a totally different way because it doesn't work for you anymore. I want you to look at your life and really take a hard look on: Where do I need to push back a little bit? Where do I need to push with my hands out to the sides of my energetic field, as I picture it, and say, "This is my space, and that's not okay with me"? Whether it's someone who's negative, someone who's critical, or someone who disempowers, I just want you to feel that through in your life and see what it's like—in a very gentle, calm, centered way—to create that space. As you start to do that, you will start to trust yourself more in your own life. That's where we really need to be practicing this stuff actually in our life, not so much in our visualizations. That's to get to get to the issue and take the edge off. It's in the real world that we do the work. [End of Transcript