The Flame:The Underage Drinking/Smoking Problem    Sh...! - Sides of Teachers you didn’t know:A Brief History of Mr. Richards Mr. Heath Rocks - LiterallyMs. Mccaw’s (Scandalous!) Love life

Food, Food, Food:Let’s talk about MoneyThe Inconveniences of LunchOn Culinary Capers as a business

WTF?:Why do IB students need to bring their ID cards to the shop?

Best Friends Forever (!) (?)

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2020

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Editor in Chief:Jenny Xie

Artistic Director:Jason Yuan

Special thanks:Thomas Gagne - SupervisorYida Wang - Volume 3 Editor in ChiefXandra Xiao - Volume 2 Editor in ChiefJack Kim - Volume 1 Editor in Chief

Artistic Director’s note:The New PANDORA was designed to be viewed in a single page, continuous scrolling format. When enjoying this issue on issuu.com, please select for the full PANDORA experience.

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Assisting Editor:Kathy Cao

Layout Design:Mia Plagmann, Ella Tian

A LETTER FROM THE EDITOR IN CHIEF

Dear Readers, old and new,

For new readers: PANDORA started off as a publication to combat the student council. Today its mission is much broader, but loyal to the name, PANDORA still acts as a platform where the voices of students (sometimes controversial) are “released”. Ultimately, we hope that the opinions we express will not merely breeze by, but instead be taken in, and acted upon by other forces in the school.

For old readers: Though still loyal to its name and mission, PANDORA has changed this year in three large ways:

If you have any questions and suggestions about PANDORA, feel free to email us at Pandora@dulwich-beijng.cn.

Best wishes,    - Editor in chief, Jenny Xie

1. We now have both KS4/5 writers and this will hopefully vary our voice2. There is increased emphasis on balanced arguments when approaching more

controversial issues. 3. In order to tackle more controversial issues and to gain more voices, we are

publishing more anonymous articles.

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The Flame:The Underage Drinking/

Smoking Issue

It’s the question that lingers in the awkward silence of communicative enquiry during PSHE:

Is underage smoking and drinking acceptable?

In a country where alcohol and cigarettes are only too accessible, it’s a question that ought to be taken more seriously. In my opinion: no.

The majority of you will stop reading here; it’s a lecture regurgitated only too often. We all feign disinterest in such matters – drinking should be a personal choice. Yet after all the alcohol related accidents and punishments we’ve witnessed, it’s time we woke up. You’ve all heard stories about students that get into serious trouble at school for getting caught drinking or smoking. The general consensus is that the perpetrators were stupid, but stupid for getting caught, not for drinking.

Because #YOLO #SWAG

Argument: AcaciaRebuttal: Anonymous

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1. Acceptance causes a vicious cycle. The more Underage drinking and smoking is tolerated, the more prevalent it becomes, and the more it seems like the norm.

I’ll give you an example - when I say that this school has a smoking/drinking problem, I get responses like, “All the other international schools in Beijing are the same” or “Please, we’re not the worst”. Even if these statements were true, would you jump off a cliff if everyone else were doing it too? I’m guessing you’re just rolling your eyes at me but when you’re wasted and every taxi you hail won’t take you home, the fact that everyone else has probably been in the same situation before doesn’t make it any better.

Let me give you another example. Compare the attitudes of smoking with drinking. As the world begins to realise how expensive it would be to treat a generation of lung cancer patients, media and governments begin to condemn smoking. Smoking has become more

Celebrity endorsed fun

and more associated with coughing invalids than the glamorous luxury it once was.

Ironically, I’ve heard even regular drinkers scorn smoking. Why the preference? Quite simply, we have a “drinking culture”. Partying and drinking is too often portrayed as part of our culture, a “rite of passage” or a necessary part of growing up. It so follows that a Friday night spent at Bar Street is acceptable, unlike cigarettes smoked secretly behind the school bike shed.

2. However, underage smoking and drinking is not solely the fault of the perpetrators.

Various studies (e.g. Straus and Bacon, 1953 « Rachel et al., 1975) have shown that the attitudes of parents regarding alcohol are good predictors of adolescents’ drinking habits. A girl once admitted that she would “go out” with friends that have parents that are “cool with” drinking so that she wouldn’t get into trouble with her own family.

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The attitudes of teachers also play a part - if Sanlitun experiences are quietly acknowledged or even shared in classrooms, then the message seems to be that the acts of underage smoking and drinking are completely acceptable.

3. If we’re pushing the point of underage smoking and drinking being acceptable, where are the limits?

15? 14? Surely you at least blanch when you hear about two-year old chain smokers that require two packs a day to keep them from tantrums. Why does this repulse you, when a drink or two at fourteen is okay? If this child chooses to smoke, why doesn’t it sit well to let him have the freedom to choose his path? If he’s too young at two, what makes you think you’re really old enough to make the choice now?

Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not a fan of smoking or drinking at any age but, as reluctant as we are to admit it, being young too brings about problems. The toughest Year 13 would be no match for a burly drunk looking to pick a fight. You might think it’ll be fine if you don’t lose your temper, but you’re in a room full of other drinkers – who’s to say that one of them won’t be inebriated enough to pick you as

a target? Think about how many of you have had friends sent to the emergency room or friends stuck in accidents while intoxicated. Face it: you’re no longer you when you’re drunk. To top it off, the sooner you start a habit, the harder it is to kick it. The reality that substance abuse kills has not yet set in. But by the time we’re in our twenties and thirties and honestly care about spending forever with someone, we’ll realise that it’s hard to stop doing something you’ve done your entire life.

Have you ever had to hold your friend’s hair back as she chokes, hunched over in a grimy toilet stall? It’s something that makes me wonder why we’d ever “accept” smoking or drinking as a lifestyle and why we’d even take it up when we’re still relatively young. Why is it that when we could be sipping hot chocolate with friends, making our best memories, we choose instead to jump around in crowded, smoky rooms – experiences we’ll probably forget the next morning? It’s a two-part problem: by accepting underage smoking and drinking, we create a more negligent society and allow it to occur younger and younger as time passes. So is underage smoking and drinking still acceptable to you?

THE REBUTTALnext up..

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Alcohol - for a lack of better word - is good.

Alcohol is the beacon of sunshine that pushes you to escape from this flummox of living. Alcohol eradicates the fleeting melancholies achieved through faded memories. Alcohol is dangerous, but it was never bad. Sure, excessive drinking may be reckless and even lethal, but the magic about alcohol is that moderation is all you need to wash your troubles away. Irresponsible drinking is a tragedy forebode but controlled consumption of alcohol in a safe environment leads to euphoria. Problem is, that as teenagers, we lack the most important thing that makes our lives better - resistance. How many times have you groggily hit the alarm clock to snooze just so you could get the - oh so precious - five flimsy minutes of sleep? And how often do you, blearily-eyed, callously scroll on 9GAG even when it’s 2am in the morning, hoping the next post would be something snicker-worthy?

Our indulgent nature is what causes drunk driving accidents and those occasional nights of shame, but we can control it. Teachers and parents shouldn’t chastise alcohol as if it is the bane of existence, instead, they should teach us and guide us towards the road of drinking responsibly.

So why do we drink? What makes alcohol so fun? It couldn’t simply be because the main cast of Pretty Little Liars drink like dogs. Although pop culture did have an impact of our perception of drinking, the truth is, alcohol simply makes us feel good. In fact, there are myriad of factors that eventually drive us to the unholiest of holy drink: self-esteem issues, stress, social problems and just a way to have fun on a friday night.

Well, first of all, alcohol enhances our opinion of ourselves, because truth is, everybody has something about them that they are less than proud of. The consumption of alcohol erases their self-doubt and they will get the chance to feel more comfortable and confident. Especially considering that girls - plagued to wear unflattering uniforms and suits all week - get the chance

“the truth is,

alcohol simply makes us feel good”

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to feel at least somewhat attractive when they are at somewhere like Sanlitun Bar Street: with this newfound confidence, they are less likely

to have esteem issues and fall victim to the horrors of anorexia

or bulimia. Instead, they would feel beautiful in a social setting dominated

by happiness.

! In addition to that, just one night in Vics may be something for people to look forward to when they are struggling with the

tribulations of school. Many students, including the majority of the students at Dulwich College Beijing, experience stress-related

problems that may become detrimental towards their health. Yet when it’s Friday, their stress levels drop faster than a dirty bass - the

anticipation of partying alleviates students from the pressures faced at school. Therefore, alcohol influenced nights may burn out some of the anxiety accumulated through enduring surprise tests and ToK lectures, which will lead the student to become, surprisingly, refreshed.

Don’t even get me started on the colourful characters you may encounter in pubs! Even though drinking may potentially lead to undesirable encounters with precarious strangers, most of the time the people that you meet in places such as Sanlitun are eccentric, interesting, and are just like you and me. Sure, it may be hard to socialize with other people in the midst of the ear-piercing anthem of “SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!”. But in quieter bars, the conversations you have with complete strangers are completely fascinating. Perhaps there are people who enjoy the same obscure interests as you do, have the same unconventional political stances as yours or may simply have thoughts that would utterly blow your mind away. Plus, the beauty of these ephemeral conversations is that even though the words flowing out of these people may completely emulsify your soul, you may never see them again - marking a permanent, beguiling memory in your life.

Now, what I have said may be too optimistic: perhaps drinking truly is a frightening and dangerous experience. However, from what I accumulated, drinking can truly

bring out all the warmth of the world to coalesce into a single unforgettable experience.

As long as the person drinking it is safe, alcohol will always be good.

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Sh...! sides of teachers you never knew...

A Brief History of

When was the last time you’ve truly conversed with a teacher?

No, a 10 minute plea for an extension on the History Assignment does not count. Fact is, you probably know almost nothing about the lives of your teachers. Well why should you -- school is a place for learning, not a place to develop a rapport with sleep deprived adults. Teachers aren’t like us. Instead they are the manifestation of devoting towards begrudgingly grading papers and drinking too much coffee. Truth is, these type of adults are immersed into a bombardment of education, age and rationality. A place were we would never reach. Yes, a dirty, dark sea of vapid ponders and forbidden dreams: a land where all is shown but nothing is seen.

Yet, the above statement cannot be even more wrong. Humans are like diamonds, beneath the dull veneer lies a land mine of riches: kidneys, livers and tissues: all worth millions in the black market. Plus, personality has some value too. The same (shockingly) applies to teachers, they truly are not what they seem. In fact, below are examples that epitomize the fact that teachers are not the mean, demeaning, demerit machines as perceived to be, and are actually - as hard it is to believe - simply, human.

MR. RICHARDSWe ignore the roots of existence most of the time, but he has managed to pinpoint our location within this chaotic modern world of events: he is our history teacher Mr. Richards.

The correlation between history and our daily lives for most students and teachers are not regarded on a regular basis. However if we observe with more detail, there is in fact an intriguing parallel amongst the uncountable revolutions printed on the pages of our textbooks with the history of Mr. Richards. He too, had an adventurous life of revolutions.

Wait, What?

#3:

- Kay Liang, Kathy Cao

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Japan has always been a regular member of discussion in our History classes. It is also the place Mr. Richards grew up in. No... wait... he was born in Cairo, then he moved to Chile, then it was South Africa and finally Japan. It is possible that this continuous exposure to different cultures is why he loves History so much. Throughout most of his childhood and teen years he was a well composed, well behaved, typical student. He wasn’t perfect though. But I’m sure you’ll find the small let-down relatable –

He lacked domestic abilities: Cooking, doing the laundry, cleaning the house.

This was because Mr. Richards was guilty, like many of us, of relying too heavily on his Ayi. It had a “significant” effect on him in the later years.

The - Beginnings

Revolution IThis revolution, also known as the transfer from high school to University, would presumably have meant Mr. Richards elevated his ‘goodness’, grew a leg, and became a Goody-three shoes. But instead, he refers to it as a time of “letting his hair down.” That is not to say he did not strive for excellence at first, Mr. Richards started off keen to succeed in his majors, (the rigorous IB course had given him his work ethics), until he learnt that there were only black and white areas of pass and fail for assignments; he realized that too much effort was frivolous.

-

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- Revolution II

Ms. Flavelle, now known as Mrs. Richards was the cornerstone of Revolution II where he gained the desire to travel. Mr. Richards took a break from his teaching major in University and travelled to New Zealand with Ms. Flavelle to surf and work at bars and restaurants. He became an adventurer at heart.

Flavorless spaghetti and plain minced meat. His poor cooking skills came back to haunt him on the most romantic day of the year. Despite the chew of disgust that would last for minutes, Ms. Flavelle stuck around with the tasteless cook...

He waited for pitter patter of rain drops in the wettest country of all – Britain. Instead he got sunshine, his fiancé on the wedding aisle and the company of friends from all over the world. Cultural differences brought together by an event of love – very pleasant indeed.

- Modern Mr. RichardsToday Mr. Richards still carries a goofy side under is calm demeanor. He dressed up as Sharapova and ran around the Village with a wig and dress and you may recall him playing the role of an old granny during House Drama: one of the most memorable school moments.

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He is constantly looking for opportunities to move and revolutionize, because he gets bored of staying in one place for too long. And so for the time being, don’t miss the chance of fully understanding Mr. Richards because there really is more to him than just history.

(literally)

#2:

As this year’s respected head of the English Department, you most likely recall him in class dissecting the

perils of propaganda from a novella starring talking bacon. Although he has an engaging

disposition, there is no way to truly connect with him. Sure english teachers are one of the

coolest of the bunch, but it’s unlikely he’ll be giving an impassioned soliloquy while you sprout out on your desk and chant out sailor oaths. Instead, he’ll probably be giving a poignant ballad meshed with an intense guitar solo while you head-bang to the beat.

Wait, What?!

Mr. Heath was in a rock band, as the lead singer and guitarist. In fact, his proudest gig was at a venue at University

at Wales with over 500 people raving over his music. When he was our age, during the dark ages of technology, he was interested in music, notably alternative rock and punk music. He had influences stemming from Foo Fighters, The Clash, Nirvana and The Sex Pistols. Sadly - unlike fellow punk rockers Rotten

MR. HEATH ROCKS

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or Vicious - he was never too keen on the punk rock scene - he would be caught dead wearing fishnet shirts and white face paint. Even more, his bass player wore a suit on stage, and Mr. Heath wore cardigans onstage! But we cannot reprimand him for his taste in clothing since this teacher, no-, person, developed a huge passion towards music.

Not only did Mr. Heath awaken a crowd with his songs, but the songs were also all written by him. Since his teenage years, he has taken the pride in creating the engine of rock music - the lyrics. However, he obviously had to have some interest in english before he could be spurring out rhythmic words: literature and reading was also a big part of his teenage years. As proven once again: 1984 is the answer for everything. And no doubt that Mr. Heath’s passion towards music stemmed from his affair with english, and vice versa. His love for music influenced him to take certain directions in life that ultimately led to teaching, and we thank him for it. And for the potential Dulwich rockers out there, he leaves words of wisdom:

“If you enjoy music and get the buzz of performing live, it’s a nice feeling and good communication, good fun and if you persevere you will become successful.”

English and music are interlinked but nobody thought that english and rock could even blend together. One is tacit and sophisticated while the other is just, uh, loud. Yet with those two, once mixed together, creates a silent explosion. Low-key and brilliant.

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D Ms McCaw, if there are three words to describe her it would be - The Daily Show (a key aspect of every history lesson). If only one word could describe her it would be “knowledgeable”. It seems like Ms McCaw has every single obscure event throughout the course of history tattooed in her brain. Tidbits include: what is Nicholas II’s favourite dish (Tsardines), and the reason why The

Nazi Army invaded Russia (they were Stalin for time and ended up Goering nowhere). Of course,

an even more enigmatic matter that is very familiar

to Ms. McCaw would be her love life.

Ms. Mccaw’s (Scandalous!)

Wait, What?!

Ms McCaw was one of those straight-laced, honour students

who studied hard and devoted intensely towards choir. Evidently,

church choir was where the lovely, corpulent, disease of destiny guided her towards the sickness of infatuation: her church choir director. Like all dreamboats,

he was desired. Badly. In fact, the entire soprano, half of the

alto, and a few of the t e n o r s w e r e disgustingly in love with him.

Well, Ms McCaw’s interest towards him was

Love life

#1:

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D

D

nothing more of a celebrity crush - similar to an attraction towards someone like Ryan Gosling or Russell Crow. Unfortunately, he was not the bottle of pure handsomeness as Ms McCaw had perceived him to be. Turns out there are several accusations of him having improper relations with teenage girls. And to make it all worse (The Horror! The Horror!): he’s bad at driving.

Incidentally, Ms McCaw bluntly became worn out of ‘bad boys’ and instead dated ‘dull, goody-two-shoes’ guys. Guys who would always finish last. Embarrassingly enough, one of them turned gay. However, there was one guy from university who was absolutely brilliant at math (he can do long division!), and took advanced, accelerated classes. He was 5 : 40000, and had the whole universe up in his hands. Instead of actually attending regular classes, he would take the exams at the beginning of the term and then could take whatever

If you were expecting a profound conclusion to show the congruities between the psyche of students and teachers, you’ve wasted your time. Instead, above are some anecdotes about people. People who had Rock and Roll dreams. People who stole traffic cones. And people who had schoolgirl crushes. If the statements sound familiar, then it’s most likely because these people are a part of you. Every person, no matter what shape or size, are

connected to an invisible string - each chain interlinking the fleeting vista of passions and memories. Meticulously crafted using drops of

differences and then animated by the similarities and conflicts of humankind.. Teachers aren’t like us at all,

they never will be. But that’s okay, because that makes life worth living.

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course he wanted. I assumed he took a full course in ‘The Advanced Eruditions a n d D i l a t o r i e s o f G a r r u l o u s Circumlocutions’. Apparently, he was quite and catch and was known as ‘The Only Who Got Away’. But there’s plenty of fish in the sea...

... Sometimes the fish are not actually fish, but are actually skin bags containing spiders. Smug, imperious, Ayn-Rand reading spiders. He, obviously, thought he knew everything. In fact, he has so full of himself that he has his own orbital pull.

LET’S TALK ABOUT...

...MONEY

Lunchtime is an important part of our school day: during this

precious hour, not only do we socialize and catch up on homework,

we also intake vital nutrients in the form of FOOD to power us through

the rest of the day during that precious hour. (or at least until the start of period 5).

The school lunch has two basic factors, Price and Quality, and our new caterer has scored moderately

high in one, and horrifically low in the other. Recently I have noticed a general trend in the opinions garnered from the students - the food has improved dramatically, the price however doesn’t justify it. In fact, take a look…

$ The Good:

Over 50% of all participants who answered the question thought that the food quality has improved. Not bad... but what is the public’s opinion about the prices?

- Alexander Chang:

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So is the price justified? Before you, the reader, begin shaking your head, consider this, these men and women are trying to make healthy food in large amounts in the few hours before break hits the Lakeside Café like a freight train, bringing hundreds of students with it. Good food has good feedback; I’ve seen lines that start stretching towards the English hallway when they serve hamburgers; and no one seems to be complaining when the Panini’s look fantastic. These people do a hard job - can you imagine having to deal with the food supply of at least 400 kids? To me that sounds like the DCB version of a zombie apocalypse, year 8s staggering into the lunch hall groaning ‘we need pasta…’

And the poll numbers show that more students think that the quality of food has improved. Better food justifies higher prices, right?

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There are only two major factors that impact our lunch: Price and Quality.

I’m going to focus on the prices. The caterer has a monopoly on the school lunch business, so they are not obligated to doingthe best they can. A competitive market after all, keeps prices low and quality high. BWYA, for instance, offers over 3 different restaurant based catering services.

But my focus when it comes to price is the things sold by commercial retailers. Below is a chart comparing drink prices in the shop from the dome (At April 9) with the drink prices in the cafeteria:

The school proposes that certain privileges such as ordering out or going to the shop are exclusively for the IB students because otherwise they wouldn’t have any privileges. Almost none of the IB students eat school lunch, and the IB common room has been described as the “Annie’s” restaurant more than once. Why would they eat school lunch when they can get better for less?

I point out the fact that the drinks are overpriced, because I do not believe that the extra distance of shipping it from the school shop to our Lunch Hall, a total distance of 50 meters, is worth another 4 RMB.

Perhaps a bit too expensive.

Monopolies frustrate even the most strong minded alien lunch ladies

Shop in Dome

Culinary Capers

Vitamin Water 4 RMB 8 RMB

Dole Fruit Juice 6 RMB 8 RMB

Water 1.5/2 RMB 2 RMB

The Bad:

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After a long, hard morning of studying, students, teachers and staff alike are all eager to take a break and fill up their stomachs. The last thing anyone wants for lunch is inconvenience.

Students have to climb the stairs, put their bags in their lockers, and then head back downstairs to wait in the hallways. It can be very tiring for the students who have lockers on the third floor to take the tiring journey of climbing up and down. Many students try to find empty lockers on the first floor, but there can only be so many. An area near the cafeteria should be drawn out for bags only to ease this situation. As a KS4 student, I can say that on most days, once the students’ year group is permitted to enter the cafeteria around 13:20, the popular choice of Paninis is usually sold out, and students have to buy food they don’t necessarily like. As a food supplier that takes in our money, a sufficient supply of food should be the least it can provide. It’s such a waste to spend money on food that you don’t even like enough to finish.

It is not a secret among the student body that many people bring home lunches and sit on hidden staircases and hide in empty classrooms to eat. They know the risks - probably a demerit and a long lecture. Still, that doesn’t stop them, because it’s still better than having to go to the cafeteria. The teachers who tell them off must think of why the students are doing this before talking - what other options do students have? Let’s be honest, this school isn’t cheap at all. The annual tuition fee is around 200,000 RMB, more expensive than ISB and BSB. Parents pay for the education, but also other things, such as the facilities. Should students have to sneak around just to find a place to eat lunch? Should they have to wait in a crowded hallway while their hungry stomachs grumble?

THE INCONVENIENCES OF LUNCH

All these problems come from one major issue: the cafeteria is far too small. The students need and deserve another cafeteria. Can the school not afford it? Everyone has seen the construction of the new building here. Apparently, there’s going to be a new theatre and library. Theatres and libraries are a l l g reat , but shouldn’t the school administration deal with more realistic, everyday, big-scale problems first? Starting with lunch, and a bigger cafeteria.

- Yan Wu

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On Culinary Capers as a Business

One essential thing we have to realize is that Culinary Capers is a business. They are not an altruistic soap kitchen and hence have the complete right to raise their prices to whatever level they please. However, as those who learn economics will know, businesses face competition, and if the price and quality of the food does not improve, the demand will decrease and the business will fail. From an interview with the caterers, we learned that they have been losing business in the past few months. If reality is any indicator, their lack of flexibility in pricing will cost them. There are a lot of measures that can be taken to pressure the prices to decrease. The school can open up the shop to non-IB students. The school can allow non-IB students to order food. A clever IB student may start a business ordering food for the non-IB students.

However, I am more sympathetic to our caterer than Alex is. I depend on school lunch from the caterer and I do sense the immense increase in the quality of food this year compared to that of last year. The food is tastier (you can both see and taste the actual seasoning) and healthier (the paninis actually contain *gasp* meat!). As to why the polls show a 50/50 on the matter, I think again price plays in as a factor. People are so appalled by the price increase that they neglect the quality increase.

But again to the price - is it really that unjustified? We are the only school Culinary Capers caters, and most of their profit comes from event catering. The quality of their food is not at “cafeteria standard”, but “event standard”. Outside of school, would you still find a full set meal of 35 RMB outrageous? For me, no. But I think they are neglecting the wants and needs of their consumers, which in this case, are only students.

- Jenny Xie

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WTF?!@#$%*‡

‘WTF?’ is a new column we’ve created in Pandora as a special place to outline the odd and unjustified legislations of Dulwich College Beijing. Here at Pandora, we dearly hope this column will shut down as soon as possible - thanks to the more sensible legislators.

Why do IB students need to PRESENT their ID

cards to go to the shop?

The temperature is below freezing, cold enough for white puffs of air to escape my lips with each breath I take. A friend walks alongside me, also cold. Together, we make our way to the front gate of the school to go to the shop. I plan to buy a snack: the cafeteria prices are rip-off.

About 20 m from our destination, a guard stops us. “Please show your ID card,” he says. My friend shows her card, but I’ve left mine in my bag - back in the main school building. The guard wouldn’t let me past. I speak Chinese fluently, so I attempt to argue. “Why can’t I go?” I ask. “It’s school rules,” he said, slightly smiling, “They don’t want you leaving school.”

In my opinion, this legislation makes no logical sense. If it were to differentiate an IB student, there are other obvious ways of differentiation, like the color and design of our uniform. Polka-dot tie and tan blazer? IB student. Red tie and blue blazer? Non-IB student See? Simple.

*UNLESS YOU HAVE YOUR STUDENT I.D, GUARDS WILL HAVE MAGIC POWERS

And if it were to prevent us from “leaving school” - well, how would showing the guard our ID card stop us from leaving the school? How would proving that we carry our ID card stop us from leaving the school? It’s not as if the guards record our names. Is this one of those sneaky, subconscious psychological theories where if you take out your student ID, you are less tempted to leave school?

Of course not.

- Jenny

Do you know any other questionable rules that Pandora should write about? Send an email to pandora@dulwich-beijjing.cn.

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The luckiest people on Earth are the ones

who have friendships stronger than ionic bonds. Out of these magnetic friendships, there is always one that would outshine the rest: Best Friends Forever (or BFFs for lazy people). A BFF is not only a friend, it is another part of you that embodies all of your interests, idiosyncrasies and shared, cherished memories. The significance of a BFF might often be overlooked because spending time with your BFF comes as naturally as breathing. But there is special love between BFFs - an odd love that frankly does not end with hurt feelings, vicious text messages and a 50 metre restraining order. It is simply when two friends are more than just friends, but best friends. Or even more than that: best friends, forever. It is a pledge not written on paper, but in the soul. A BFF is like

best friends FOREVER!!- KELLY CHOI

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oxygen, without it you cannot survive.However, having a BFF isn’t all giggles and ra inbows. Sometimes, they might frustrate you and become ‘frenemies’, friends who are enemies, but only temporarily. Thankfully, no matter how many knives BFFs may put on each other’s back, they will always have a first aid kit and chocolate bars in handy. The next day, you will find yourself instinctively looking for your best friend, and then fighting over that last piece of chocolate bar your friend didn’t even want. Everybody knows only you like the caramel-crab flavoured ones.

So, what is good about a friend who is essentially an aggravating machine? Wouldn’t best friends know -and make fun of- all of your most embarrassing secrets (including what happened in fifth period!)? Well, the tiny cherry on top of this mess of a friendship would be the plethora inside jokes. Sometimes they are only gibberish and silly facial expressions, but it makes us laugh until our spleens start literally shooting out of our eye sockets. And we’ve got plenty of pictures to prove it! (“No.” - Pandora Photo Department) Additionally, there’s nothing more exciting than sharing secrets with a best friend, mainly due to the possibility of potential blackmail and humiliation opportunities. Who said BFFs are friendly? Yet just the simple fact of being close enough to share secret says a lot about the state of the friendship. It means that there is a kind of trust, a silent, all knowing trust that tells you this person and you are tied by an invisible string - it cannot be seen, but you know it is there. No one else can sense it.

Is your “bestie” actually a spy sent by your ex to initiate your social destruction? Take this FBI certified* test to find out!

1. Does this person treat you with respect?

2. Do you know this person’s favorite color/food/movie/song?

3. Do you know all about this person’s love life? (wink)

4. Do you ever have fights with this person?

5. Do you feel comfortable being yourself in front of this person?

6. Would you answer his/her phone call at 3 a.m.?

7. Do they try to make things better after they hurt your feelings?

8. Have you ever seen this person cry?

9. Would you go over to his/her’s house, right now?

10. Do you know his/her deepest, darkest secrets?

Yes! - 10 pointsUm... - 5 pointsNo. - 1 point

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70+ = OMG BFF! *takes selfie*50 - 70 = Homie30 - 50 = Yeah I guess we’re friends0 - 30 = Stop stalking me on Facebook.

22

‘Best friends forever’ might sound like a banal word. Some might even say they cannot possibly exist in this mess of pessimism. But they do exist, as fragments of joy in this perfunctory toil they call life. Nothing is perfect, which means that you and your best friend might not always have the same interest or agree on the same opinion. Despite these problems, they are the ones who remember every quip you’ve ever muttered. They are the ones who turn the darkness of silence into an everyday pleasantry. And they are the ones who are just, there: when you don’t want them but desperately need them. No matter who it is, from Carly Rae Jepson (when she’s not tending to her phone bills) to Leonardo da Vinci, everybody needs one best friend.

Forever.

APPROVED BY THE SCHOOL LEADERSHIP TEAM