Prosperous Coach - THE EXTRAORDINARY WOMANtheprosperouscoach.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/... · 2014. 3. 28. · • you coach extraordinary clients. • you are an extraordinary

WOMANINTENSIVE

THE

EXTRAORDINARY

Los Angeles • March 13–16, 2014

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The reasonable woman adapts herself to the conditions that surround her.

The unreasonable woman adapts surrounding conditions to herself.

All progress depends on the unreasonable woman.

— George Bernard Shaw (Amended. Slightly.)

TheExtraordinaryWomanIntensive • March13–16,2014 • RichLitvin

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Welcome to The Extraordinary Woman Intensive

Since 2005, I have gradually surrounded myself with some of the most powerful, confident, challenging and successful women on the planet. I have coached incredible women—from soldiers to emergency room physicians to Hollywood film directors to Presidential candidates. I have learned from many more—and I even married one.

I founded and have run The Confident Woman’s Salon for the past five years. And I spent two years traveling the world interviewing and studying The Forbes 100 Most Powerful Women—and those on their way.

And I have come to one conclusion.

Roseanne was right:

The thing women have yet to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just take it.

— Roseanne Barr

In Eastern thought, the two complementary forces that make up all aspects and phenomena of life are referred to as yin and yang. In the symbolism of the two great energies, the phoenix and the dragon are frequently represented together because, combined, they are more than the sum of their parts.

The dragon symbolizes the qualities of authentic, powerful leadership—true majesty. And this Intensive is designed to have you step fully into your role as a leader—of yourself and of others. You’ll learn to support powerful women on this journey for themselves, too.

The symbol of the phoenix evokes the power of deep transformation and rebirth. And this Intensive is designed to have you embrace slowing down and accessing your deepest intuition. You’ll learn to support powerful women on this journey for themselves, too.

The Extraordinary Woman Intensive • March 13–16, 2014 • Rich Litvin

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You are here because:

• you coach extraordinary clients.

• you are an extraordinary coach—or you are on your way.

• you coach clients to drastically increase their wealth, improve their business, relationships, health—and even their sex life.

• you are ready to lean into your edge and take steps towards your fears—this is the only path of growth.

• you have a bias for action—this is not a ‘motivational’ seminar—it will be your mission to turn your insights into powerful action in the world.

• you are willing to have fear be irrelevant to how you show up. It’s ok to feel fear—that’s called being human—you just won’t use it as a reason for not taking action.

• you are already running a profitable business—or you have a focused professional skill-set and a huge entrepreneurial drive—or you have a track record of success (because success is transferable).

• you or your clients are up to big things in life.

• you are willing to lean into your edge.

• you are willing to feel uncomfortable.

• you believe—at least, deep down—that you are a powerful coach.

Are you serious?

Are you serious about becoming an extraordinary coach? Are you serious about becoming an extraordinary entrepreneur? Are you willing to take risks… Do you have a love of adventure… And are you willing to seek discomfort—instead of striving for comfort?

If you are ready to play full out and hold nothing back—you are in the right place…

If you are ready to create even one new client—you are in the right place…

If you are ready to get vulnerable and dive deeper than most coaches go in a lifetime of trainings—you are in the right place…

There are four levels to learning: awareness, awkwardness, application, assimilation.This weekend you will journey through each of these levels.

Have fun. Practice. Play full out. Lean into your edge. Get uncomfortable. If you do these things you will generate what you are asking for.


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Coaching Mastery is a lifelong game.

It’s not designed to be comfortable.And the rewards can be exponential.Every time you introduce yourself to someone this weekend,get curious... and begin with one of these questions:

• What don’t you want me to know about you?

• What would surprise me about you?

• What’s your secret dream?

• What’s your secret fear?

• What was your most embarrassing moment?

• What was your biggest failure?

“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.”

— Brené Brown

I look forward to witnessing you play full out, this weekend.

Love. Rich Litvin

P.S. Enjoy meeting the team, this weekend, too. They are all here to support you in different ways.

And they are very, very friendly.

Sarah Neumann, Director of Client Astonishment

Danielle Baird, Creative Director

Monica Day, Connection Catalyst

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ContentsA STRONG LIFE

Find Your Strongest Life: What the Happiest and Most Successful Women Do Differently . . . . 9

Ten Myths about the Lives of Women . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11

It’s OK To Be A Quitter . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13

Learn to Love No (Saying It AND Hearing It) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15

THE HEROINE’S JOURNEYThe Heroine’s Journey: How Campbell’s Model Doesn’t Fit . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

LEADERSHIPWomen Leaders: Stop Trying to Lead Like a Man . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21

6 Secrets of How Successful Women Lead . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 23

7 Powerful Insights for Marketing to Women . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

MASTERYThe Ultimate Cheat Sheet for Mastery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31

Things The Most Successful People Do That Make Them Great . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37

What Would Happen If You Improved Everything by 1%: The Science of Marginal Gains. . . . . 41

Astonish The Clients You Have And Astonish The Ones You Don’t Have Yet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45

Why MANY Smart People Don’t Get the Support They Deserve . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47

THE POWER OF GREAT QUESTIONSThe Phoenix Checklist: Innovation By The CIA . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51

How To Ask All the Wrong Questions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55

The 5 Questions Every Company Should Ask Itself . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59

“This Time is Different” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61

APPENDIXRich Litvin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65

Monique DeBose . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66

Ali Shanti . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67

Five Frogs Are Sitting On A Log . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68

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As women, we must stand up for ourselves. We must stand up for each other.

We must stand up for justice for all.

—Michelle Obama


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Find Your Strongest Life: What the Happiest and Most Successful Women Do Differently

By Marcus Buckingham

Your secret to success and happiness rests in your ability, no matter what life throws at you, to make strong choices without regret. So stop juggling and start catching. Stop judging yourself quite so harshly…. Stop your balancing act, and start intentionally imbalancing your days and weeks toward the strong-moments in each part of your life.

A strong life isn’t necessarily a wealthy life, a career-focused life, a stay-at-home life, or a married life. It can’t be defined by a particular job, field, income bracket, or number of hours worked. It can’t be defined by any of those things because a strong life isn’t what you do. It’s what you feel…

A strong woman feels effective and capable. She feels that many of the activities filling her weeks are things she’s good at, activities that give her a chance to express her strengths.

When a woman leads a strong life... her purpose needs are met—she feels she is doing what she is supposed to be doing, however imperfectly. Her relationship needs are met—she has a loving husband, a supportive boss, a caring group of friends. And her recognition needs are met—someone within her circle of intimates is celebrating her successes and reinforcing her strengths.

You mustn’t entrust your life to dreams because, unfortunately, all the research we have on dreams and goals reveals that we are woefully inaccurate at predicting which dreams will fulfill us…. And even if one of your wildest dreams comes true, you are wired, as are all human beings, to become hardened to the joys of this dream, just as you are wired to become increasingly immune to the sadness of a tragedy.

There’s nothing inherently fulfilling about ‘balance’…. Balance is the opposite of movement. When you are balanced you are stationary, holding your breath, trying not to let any sudden twitch or jerk pull you too far one way or the other. You are at a standstill.

A STRONG LIFE


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This precarious, motionless state is not worth striving for. It’s the wrong life goal. Strive for fullness instead. In each domain you must be able to imbalance your life toward at least two specific strong

moments…. Strength in one part of your life does not compensate for weakness in others…. each part of your life must contain strong-moments.


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Ten Myths about the Lives of Women by Marcus Buckingham

Studies show assumptions about women and leadership are often wrong

1. With better education, better jobs, and better pay, women today are happier and more fulfilled than they were 40 years ago.

Actually, the opposite is true. Surveys of more than 1. 3 million men and women reveal that women today are less happy relative to where they were 40 years ago, and relative to men.

2. Women become more engaged and fulfilled as they get older.

No, men do. According to a 40-year study of 46,000 men and women, women begin their lives more satisfied than men and then gradually become less satisfied with every aspect of their lives—marriage, finances, things they own, even family.

3. At work, women are relegated to lower level roles.

In fact, 37% of women hold managerial positions, vs. 31% of men.

4. Most men think that men should be the primary breadwinner and women should be the primary caretaker.

While 74%of men agreed with this statement in 1977, only 42% say that today. (39% of women agree.)

5. Women would prefer to work for other women.

About 40% of women want to work for men, while 26% prefer a female boss.


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6. Flexible work options, such as paid leave and telecommuting, allow women to feel happier at work.

Studies actually show a negative correlation between taking advantage of such options and a women’s self-reported daily happiness. These programs, by themselves, won’t make you happy.

7. Motherhood makes women happier.

Studies show married mothers are more stressed and less happy than married women with no kids.

8. Kids want more time with their working mothers.

Not according to the kids. When 1,000 children in grades 3-12 were asked what they wanted from their mom, only 10% said “more time. “ More than a third said they wanted their mom to be “less stressed and tired. “

9. Women are good at multitasking.

Women are no better at it than men, and research shows that your IQ drops 10 points when you do two tasks at once.

10. Women are paid less for the same job.


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It’s OK To Be A Quitter By Arianna Huffington

This might be the most welcome advice ever for commitment-phobes and people who hate to-do lists. Quitting a personal project isn’t always a bad thing. Really.

Did you know that you can complete a project by dropping it?Calling time on something you don’t like or don’t have time to commit to can actually

make you more productive.Any project that you’ve started in your mind drains energy. One of my favorite sayings is

“100 per cent is a breeze, 99 per cent is a bitch.”That doesn’t mean ignoring my other needs, but it means when I’m in it, I’m really in it.

And that means often saying no to good things, to things that you might want to do, but get in the way of sleep, or get in the way of being with your children, or whatever it is that’s also very important to you.

So those Rosetta Stone lessons you’ve already paid for? Bring a dictionary next time you’re in Paris. Can’t seem to get through the first half of Anna Karenina for the fourth time? Go see the movie. You’ll be happier.

Just have a conversation with yourself and say these projects are done, over, and then you have energy for the things you’re really going to commit yourself to.

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Take “No” as the start of the negotiation, not the end.

—Theresa Peters, Partner, United Talent Agency


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THE POWER OF NO

Learn to Love No (Saying It AND Hearing It) from How to Sell by James Altucher

Say No

If someone wants to do a big deal with you it’s hard to say “no.” But No is valuable for many reasons:

Opportunity cost. Instead of pursuing something you really don’t want to do, you could free up time and energy to find something more lucrative or something you would enjoy more. Opportunity cost is the one BIGGEST cost in all of our lives. We spend it like there’s no tomorrow.

And guess what? Eventually there’s no tomorrow.Supply and demand. If you reduce the supply of you (through “No”) then the demand for

you goes up and you make more money (and have more fun).

Never Take “No” For An Answer

This statement, which everyone knows, is usually applied incorrectly.People think it means, keep pushing and trying new things until you get a “yes.” That’s not

what it means. If you do that, you end up in the spam box. Then you end up in the coffin box. In other words, you end up dead to the person you are trying to sell to.

Instead, remember point A. Be a friend. However flimsy that connection of friendship is. Follow on Twitter, follow on Facebook. Say nice things about the person to other people. Never gossip.

Do the art of the “check in.”Send updates after the “No” on how you are doing, on how the product or service or

business or whatever is doing. Not every day. Maybe once a month. Maybe once a year. Who knows. Eventually you will find the “yes” with that person. It could be, and often is, up to 20 years later.

Who knows? You plant a seed and eventually the garden blooms.

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The Heroine’s Journey: How Campbell’s Model Doesn’t Fit

By B.J. Priester

There are three main problems we see in Joseph Campbell’s monomyth and its impact on storytelling, and how we hope to design the Heroine’s Journey model differently to avoid them.

1. Campbell’s model looks backward, not forward (those who do not learn from history, George Santayana famously declared, are doomed to repeat it. But those who do not recognize important differences between the present and the past also can be doomed to disaster.)

2. It is built for male heroes (many stories will have a far different nature, based in the different choices faced by women and the different values they often possess).

3. It is often unintentionally limiting (tales of a truly solo hero on a lone adventure are rare; most heroes will have supporting characters joining them on their quests).

So, in designing the Heroine’s Journey model to avoid these difficulties, it makes sense to start with the simplest, starkest difference.

The Heroine’s Journey Should Be Built for Female Heroines

Because a strong female heroine experiencing a mythic coming of age tale is the core of the Heroine’s Journey, the model should be designed to readily include many elements that reflect iconic choices faced by young women and the different values that often animate women’s lives compared to men. Choices about when to have children, or whether to have children, can be at the very heart of self-identity for many female characters in a way that

THE HEROINE’S JOURNEY

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The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.

—Alice Walker


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often is not the case for their male counterparts. Choices about how to balance work and home, career and family, are defining challenges for many women’s lives, in way that is not the case for many men.

Similarly, portraying a heroine as valuing her family, friends, lovers, and other relationships is often critically important to writing her in a credible and relatable way. Heroines also frequently undertake their journeys as part of a team, in contrast to the iconic lone male hero. A heroine’s objectives often are different, as well, such as protective or nurturing motivations or placing the safety of others above her own survival or glory.

The Heroine’s Journey should avoid being too restrictive or limiting in its parameters. Not every Heroine’s Journey, for example, will include a love interest, or a family, or a team of allies. Some heroines may not be particularly nurturing, or they may be fighting for personal glory. The Heroine’s Journey model is centered not around a “hero with boobs” but around a strong female heroine.

The Heroine’s Journey Should Support Other Characters, Too

Many of the successful stories centered around a strong female heroine also feature a supporting cast whose help is important to her success. Whether it is friends, family, mentors, allies, or lovers, heroines usually work cooperatively with others to achieve their triumphs and endure their tragedies. Consequently, the Heroine’s Journey model should be designed to incorporate these elements as a natural part of her path.

The Heroine’s Journey Should Be Forward-Looking

The Heroine’s Journey needs to take a modern and forward-looking approach to the roles of women, female characters, and heroines. The values and stories of the past often are inextricably connected with negative views of women in real life and in storytelling. Making a clean break, and focusing on the present and the future, has the best chance of creating stronger female characters

Often the hero triumphs not by fulfilling the expectations of others, but by changing the rules and winning on his own terms. Rather than faith in an external power, it is often the heroine’s faith in herself, or lack of it, that determines whether she succeeds or fails.

The hit Broadway musical Wicked hits this theme in one of its featured songs, Ephalba’s “Defying Gravity,” in which she declares her break from the expectations of her elders and charts her own path.

As with other aspects of the Heroine’s Journey, the variations on modern myth can be as varied as the heroines and their tales. But to do these characters justice, their stories should be grounded in this forward-looking, modern spirit.

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It is our choices, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.

—J.K Rowling


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LEADERSHIP

Women Leaders: Stop Trying to Lead Like a Man By Jana Kasperkevic

What’s lacking in the world right now is not women leaders, but rather leaders who lead like women, said best-selling leadership author Simon Sinek, speaking at the Women Entrepreneurs Rock the World Conferencein New York Wednesday.

“In business, largely, we teach male leadership. And we are teaching you [women] how to be like men. Ignore it all. Follow your gut. Follow your instinct,” he said. “And if your instinct is to look out for someone, to care for them—and maybe the numbers won’t do as well this year—that’s ok. It is a ridiculous notion that we all have that companies have to grow at ridiculous percentages every single year.”

In fact, Sinek said, women harbor some natural tendencies that make them especially effective in leadership positions: Women tend to focus more on people than numbers and as a result are empathetic and tuned in.

Here are the four steps that Sinek recommends entrepreneurs, both male and female, take in order to become a better leader:

1. Establish a tangible vision.

“If you want people to help you build your vision, it must be tangible and put it into words so that they too can imagine it,” said Sinek.

Metrics are important in measuring growth and determining how close a company is to reaching its goals. However, your vision needs to be more than just becoming the “biggest, largest, fastest, most loved” company.


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2. Remember that with leadership comes self sacrifice.

Think of leaders like parents and coaches, who take pride in their people—their family or their team. “Reinforce the bond between the boss and the employee. I will work hard for you and when you go off and accomplish great things, I will be proud,” Sinek suggested.

However, that’s not enough. Leadership is not just about being proud of your team and ensuring that you have common tangible goals. You have to put your staff before your own interests.

“If you want the perks of leadership, it comes at a cost. It is not free. And the cost of leadership is self interest,” explained Sinek. “If you are not willing to sacrifice yourself for your people, you don’t deserve the perks of leadership. We do not feel safe at work because we know our leaders would rather sacrifice us to save the numbers than sacrifice the numbers to save us.”

3. Expend the energy and time to talk to your customers and employees.

“Zapping off emails to tell someone something—good or bad—doesn’t work, “ said Sinek. Instead, go to your employees and tell them in person about what kind of a job they are doing. “That time that you spent is valuable.”

While email and Internet are great for spreading and sharing information, they are not good for sharing feelings, opinions and constructive criticism. Spending time and energy talking with your employees enables you to build stronger relationships.

4. Be a good parent.

Just as if you were a parent, as a leader “you have the right to set goals, you have the right to set standards, you have the right to discipline when necessary,” said Sinek. You should also harness the empathy of a parent.


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6 Secrets of How Successful Women Lead By Marla Tabaka

Two authors look beyond the stereotypes to examine the research-based evidence about the leadership traits women possess.

In the era of post-post-feminism, let’s just admit it: Men and women are—or at least can be—different in certain ways. And some of those ways show up at the workplace. Some even show up in the C-suite. So, let’s take the time to ponder how that, well, works.

To put it simply: Do women lead differently?According to Sharon Hadary and Laura Henderson, the answer is an uniquivocal yes.

What’s more interesting, though, is that they believe that leadership by a woman tends to yield very desirable results—including better odds of business profitability and creation of more businesses that are fundamentally creative and innovative.

For two decades, Hadary, the founding executive director of the Center for Women’s Business Research, and Henderson, founder of Prospect Associates, a $20-million health communications and biomedical research firm, have been conducting research on women in leadership roles. What they confirmed is that the women leaders with multi-million-dollar businesses combine their unique feminine leadership with sound business acumen to achieve their highest aspirations.

In their recent book, How Women Lead: The 8 Essential Strategies Successful Women Know, the authors also cite the latest academic research affirming that women’s leadership styles are condusive to success. (For instance, MIT found that the most creative and productive groups included women. Also, Pepperdine University reported that businesses with more women in leadership reported higher financial results than those with fewer women leaders.)

Hadary and Henderson offer these success strategies for leaders who wish to maximize their strengths with solid business acumen to become a high-potential leader.

1. Own Your Destiny—and Judge Yourself Only by Your Own Metrics

One fascinating fact illuminated by this recent research is that women who achieve most are also women who define success in their own terms and integrate achieving high financial goals with creating a business that reflects their passions. Their businesses provide socially responsible products and services, offer opportunities for employees to thrive, make a positive difference in the community, and simultaneously create personal wealth for the owner.


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Successful entrepreneurs establish high goals and when they achieve their goals, they move the bar even higher.

“Women should think of their businesses as a $1 million business from Day One,” says Henderson. “This drives how they structure the business, the decisions they make, and the way they present themselves and the business.”

2. Lead Like a Woman

Highly successful women are likely to build on their leadership strengths of collaboration, inclusion, and consultation. The result within a company is a culture where everyone’s ideas and insights are heard and considered in making decisions and where people feel valued and, therefore, are committed to achieving organizational goals.

There’s something else that seems to be specific to women’s leadership styles: Women think more holistically. That means, when women view a situation, they have a tendency go beyond the specific facts and the numbers to take into account personnel and organization considerations. As a result, they identify opportunities, risks, and gaps that others often miss, strengthening their competitive edge.

3. Numbers Tell Stories. Become a Translator of These

Never undermine your credibility as a businesswoman by opening a discussion with a statement about your lack of business acumen. Learn about finance and speak about it in its own language. The women business owners and leaders with the largest, fastest-growing organizations produce more financial reports more frequently than those with slower growing businesses. They identify the key metrics that give them the insights they need and embrace financial knowledge as a major part of their strategic decision-making.

4. Build Exceptional Teams

Hire the best from the very beginning and avoid the common mistake of hiring executives from a large company. You need leaders who can work effectively in a fast-moving, entrepreneurial organization. These are people who have the ability to commit to a bigger cause and possess values congruent with yours, curiosity and critical thinking skills, common sense, people and relationship skills, risk taking skills, and respect, admiration, and tolerance for the entrepreneur. Hiring to these characteristics will result in a team that can identify and implement solutions to the evolving challenges of the entrepreneurial business.


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5. Nurture Your Greatest Asset: You

Avoid becoming so caught up in your work you cannot see the world around you. Focus on integrating all aspects of your life and treat your time and energy as scarce resources—as scarce and valuable as any item in your budget. Establish priorities based on your values and goals and use them to make decisions about accepting requests for your time.

The most successful leaders are life-long learners. Set aside time to attend conferences and seminars, read, participate in networks that provide industry knowledge, and meet with experts. Don’t forget to complement your professional networks with personal networks of friends, like-minded women, and colleagues who will share experiences and knowledge, support you in the tough times, and celebrate with you over successes.

6. Celebrate the Journey

Recognize that success is not a one-time shot. It is about composing a life over time. Take the time to enjoy the journey and celebrate the successes along the way.

Stay open to serendipity—the joys and opportunities that appear unexpectedly in life—whether at work or in your personal life. Beware of missing or dismissing these opportunities because you are so focused on your day-to-day plan. Be open to saying: “Yes, let’s try it and see where it leads.”

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A woman is like a tea bag; you put her in hot water and she just gets stronger.

—Eleanor Roosevelt


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7 Powerful Insights for Marketing to Women By Tami Anderson

Women have been associated with shopping since the concept began but, until fairly recently, not so much with buying. When it comes to big purchases like cars, homes, finances or technology, the conversations (and the marketing dollars) have primarily been directed to men. The theory seemed to be that the hunters decided what to get and the gatherers went out and got it. Today it’s clear that women are making a majority of both home and business purchases.

Startups and small businesses can apply some of the same lessons that big brands have been learning about effective marketing strategies for women. To tap into the power of this $7 trillion market in America, (which, by the way, exceeds the size of the entire Japanese economy) keep these seven insights in mind:

There is no “women’s market”; there’s your women’s market

A few years ago Salomon, the performance ski and outdoor brand, took a look at the growing spending power of women in the sports market and decided that their male-oriented image was missing the mark. As part of a seven-year women’s initiative, they spent two years identifying who their female customers were and learning what was important to them about sport, shopping and life. Further analysis led them to three well-defined market segments, based on lifestyles vs. demographics. Salomon determined that reaching out to these passionate advocates with a finely tuned message was a much better plan than a watered-down women’s campaign. Salomon Women Will kicked off in fall of 2005 and has exceeded the company’s expectations, fostering an avid female following around the world.

“Brand Lite” isn’t the answer

Many companies make the mistake of thinking they need to create a separate brand to reach women, one that is softer and more accessible. And let’s be honest, they’re also afraid that feminizing the core brand will alienate the guys. The reality is that marketing to women is just smarter marketing strategy, grounded in meeting and exceeding high standards and consistently delivering on your brand promise. We think one of the best examples of a great company that gets it right with women is Apple. Terrific design, easy-to-use technology, and a passionate lifestyle brand message hold strong appeal for women and for consumers


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overall. No need to invest money in making and marketing herPod when iPod is pretty damn great the way it is.

Communicate product value instead of listing features

Sounds simple, but many organizations develop and market products without ever asking their female customers what features they think are most important and why. Volvo has made gaining women’s input a key part of its development process since the late 1980s, leading to such improvements as color coding of fluid lids under the hood, easier-to-fold-away rear seats and easier-to-load trunks. But rather than make its marketing message an endless list of “look at all our cool stuff,” the “Volvo for Life” slogan conveys the two umbrella messages that are especially important to women: safety and dependability. Online research and a visit to the dealership reveal all the terrific features Volvo has developed to back their message up.

Understand that she’s always watching

Women are great at detecting inconsistencies. If your marketing message doesn’t match up with your product performance and your retail experience, you’ve lost her trust and she’ll go somewhere else. Prudential’s “What Is The Price of Love?” campaign is designed to educate women about the value of life insurance in the event of her untimely demise. But the call to action has a serious flaw. Upon dialing the toll free number and direct extension listed on the ad, we were shuttled through voice mail hell, at one point asked to enter our social security number to continue, and then finally reached a live person by pressing “0” repeatedly. While the rep was courteous and friendly, he had no idea what we were talking about and gave us another (not toll free) number for the sales office, which was closed for the day. Their services might be the greatest thing since sliced bread, but we were too spent from the phone gymnastics to find out.

Respect her

In Fara Warner’s new book, The Power of the Purse, she chronicles the substantial shift McDonald’s began making following a 2002 sales slump, when the company was forced to realize that it was still talking to women as if it was 1955. Up until that point, the company had viewed women mainly as a conduit to kids. This “mom marketing” no longer fit with modern women and they were taking their kids and their dollars elsewhere. McDonald’s quest to “find the woman inside the mom” led them to the highly successful launch of Premium Salads, healthier Happy Meal options and a revamping of PlayPlaces to include comfortable seating and wireless internet access. A willingness to solicit and listen to women’s input and understand that women didn’t see themselves only through the “mom” lens allowed McDonald’s to redefine its relationship with its most important consumer, ultimately winning her business back.


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Embrace high standards

Women are suckers for quality and, more importantly, when they find it they’re willing to pay for it. Consider Whole Foods, which has enjoyed a 1,552 percent increase in its stock price over the last decade. Affectionately nicknamed “Whole Paycheck” by some, Whole Foods is able to charge higher prices in a notoriously low margin industry because they have created a lifestyle brand that delivers on its promise. With high quality, hard-to-find products, a pleasant atmosphere, knowledgeable, courteous sales people, and even chair massage in some locations, Whole Foods has transformed something uninspiring and mundane into a premium experience.

Be willing to commit

There it is, the dreaded “c” word. The reason? It goes both ways. This isn’t a market you can just dip your toes into. Wyndham Hotels recently celebrated the ten-year anniversary of its award-winning Women On Their Way initiative, launched in 1995 to better serve the needs of women business travelers with improved services and amenities, such as healthier menu options and a courtesy call announcing room service. When the program began women accounted for 19 percent of Wyndham’s business travelers. Today that number has increased to over 35 percent. When you consider that, according to the Center for Women’s Business Research, 86 percent of women entrepreneurs say they use the same products and services at home as they do in their business it’s clearly no accident that women also now make up 50 percent of Wyndham’s customer base overall.

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I don’t believe in guilt, I believe in living on impulse as long as you never intentionally hurt another person and don’t judge people in your life. I think you should live completely free.

—Angelina Jolie


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The Ultimate Cheat Sheet for Mastery By James Altucher

Are you satisfied with your life? Do you go to work knowing you could do better?Knowing there are unique talents in you that could make you great, the best in the world?This post is about achieving mastery. But also why it’s ok to not get mastery in the traditional

sense. You can define it, not use the definitions provided by everyone else.In other words, it’s fine to be a loser.There are a lot of books written on this topic. If you want to read an entire book on it,

read Robert Greene’s “Mastery” (or watch my podcast with him). There’s also “Outliers” by Malcom Gladwell.

But it’s not that hard. It doesn’t take a book to describe what makes a master. For one thing, most of us, and I mean me, will not be masters at anything.

I try. I tried with chess. I hit the rank of “master” but that doesn’t mean anything. I’ll never be world class at it. I’ve tried with writing. I’ve been writing for twenty or so years.

But I’ve known a lot of people who are among the best in the world in their field. I’ve read all the books. I’ve talked to all the people and dissected what they thought led them to their mastery.

I’ve built and sold businesses to people who were masters of their fields in every industry. I’ve invested in people who were masters in their fields.

So I’ve at least recognized who were masters and what they did.Take this then with a grain of salt but based on my experience and the experiences of all

the people I’ve interacted with.Here are the elements of mastery. I also have some good news and bad news.

A) TALENT.

I hate to say it, but talent is a factor.There’s a myth that everyone is talented at at least one thing and you just have to find it.This isn’t true.Most people are not talented at anything. Most people can be pretty good at something.

For instance, Tim Ferris shows in “The Four Hour Chef” how you can be a pretty good chef with four hours worth of work.

I’ve tried his techniques and in four hours I made some pretty good dishes. Thank you, Tim. But at the launch of Tim’s book he held a dinner where each course (I think there were eight of them) was cooked by a different chef.


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One of the chefs was (approximately) eight years old and his dish might’ve been the best served. That kid will be a master one day if he isn’t already. That’s talent.

When my chess ranking was peaking back in 1997 I played in a tournament against a girl fittingly named Irina Krush.

She really did crush me in about 25 moves. After the game she told me, “May be your bishop to B4 move felt a little weak to me.” She was right.

She was 13 years old. I stopped playing chess in tournaments right that moment and now only play when I’m on the phone with people. She had talent. She’s now one of the youngest women grandmasters in the world.

B) HOW DO YOU FIND WHAT YOU ARE TALENTED AT?

I think there are roughly two methods.

i) Take out a pad.

List everything you enjoyed doing from the ages of six to eighteen, before your life was ruled by college, relationships, crappy jobs, mortgages, kids, responsibilities, self-loathing, etc.

I was talking to Lewis Howes on my podcast. He mentioned he always wanted to be an athlete since he was a little kid.

He also mentioned that he used networking skills to help himself out even at an early age in order to deal with what seemed like poor academic skills. He found his two talents and became masters at both.

Often, it’s a combination of sub-talents that make you uniquely a master in that one field.

For me, I don’t know if I will master anything, but since I was a kid I loved writing, games, and anything to do with business. Maybe one day.

ii) Go to the bookstore.

Find a topic you would be willing to read 500 books on. If you can’t wait to read all 500 books in the knitting section then you probably have a talent at knitting.

Note that it is really ok to not be talented at anything. We weren’t put on this Earth to be talented at knitting.


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Do you know why we were put in this Earth? I hope you know, because then you could tell me. But chances are there really isn’t any reason.

We ultimately are a combination of all of our experiences, all of the things we are interested in, all of the things we flirt with. And that combination might look like garbage to everyone else.

So play with your garbage and be happy. If you can do that, you’re in the top 0.00001%.

C) FOUR HOURS A DAY.

It’s not mystery Tim Ferriss’s books all start with “The Four Hour…” I ask almost every master I encounter, in every field, how much time per day do they spend mastering their field.

They did not give the standard Silicon Valley BS Entrepreneur answer: “I work 20 hours a day and if I didn’t need to sleep I’d work 30 hours a day”.

You can’t get good at something if you are working 20 hours a day. In fact, something is very wrong in your life if that is how much you are working at ONE thing.

The typical answer is: “I study four hours a day”. Anatoly Karpov, former World Chess Chamption, said the maximum he would study chess is three hours a day. That’s a guy who was a world champion.

Then, when he wasn’t in tournaments, he’d spend the rest of the day exercising, studying languages, doing other things to balance out his life.

D) HISTORY.

In any area of life you want to succeed at, you have to study the history.All art is created in context. If someone wrote Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony right now it

would be laughed at. It wouldn’t fit the current context of music, even though it would be a work of genius.

Andy Warhol tried many different areas of art before he decided that painting Campbell’s Soup Cans were the right art for the right moment in time.

In any sport, studying the history of how previous world champions played and trained is critical towards figuring how you can improve on that training and playing.

In any business, studying the history of that industry, the biographies of the prior executives, the successes and failures of those who went before you, is critical for mastering that business.

For example, I had Greg Zuckerman on the podcast talking about the current resurgence in oil drilling in the US. Everyone thought the US was out of oil back in the 1970s.


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Well, now the fastest growing city in the United States is Williston, North Dakota and the US will probably be a net energy exporter by 2020. This is not a political opinion on fracking. It’s just reality what is happening now.

If I were remotely interested in fracking I’d study where all the oil was drilled back in the 1920s, 1950s, 1970s. How the first wildcatters found their wells. What technologies were used. What’s the history of the technology. How were improvements made. What’s the history of the geopolitics around oil drilling. And so on. Somewhere in there there is a path to getting incredibly wealthy. Not for me, because I could care less about oil. But for someone. Or many.

E) STUDY YOUR FAILURES.

I was talking to poker champ Ylon Schwartz. He’s won over $7mm in tournament winnings and untold millions in informal cash games. We grew up together playing chess until he made the switch first to backgammon and then poker.

I asked him why a lot of people play poker for 20 years but never get better. What’s the story?He said, “everyone wants to blame someone. They want to blame bad luck. Or they had a

fight with their wife. Or something. But the key is you have to study your failures. You have to take notes about your losing hands and even your winning hands. You have to think about everything.”

F) EXPERIENCE.

At some point you have to cook 10,000 meals. Or play a million hands of poker. Or 1000s of games of chess. Or start 20 businesses.

Very few are successful right away. That would require too much luck andluck favors the prepared and the persistent.

In those 1000s of whatever you will encounter much failure. We all know that the best baseball players in the world are enormous successes if they strike out “only” 70% of the time.

When my dad died I went to his house and logged onto this chess account. I saw that he played about 30,000 games. He never got any better.

A lot of people can play the 10,000 hands of poker and never get better. Or bake 1000 cakes and never get better.

You have to remember your experiences, study your failures, try to note what you did right and what you did wrong, and remember them for future experiences.

Will future experiences be exactly like the old experiences? Almost never.But you have to have the ability to say “Hmm, this is like the time four years ago when X, Y,

and Z happened.”


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G) PATTERN RECOGNITION

Being able to recognize when current circumstances are like an experience you had in the past or an experience SOMEONE ELSE you’ve studied had in the past is critical to mastery.

THE GOOD NEWS:

You don’t have to be the master of the world. You don’t have to do any of the above.Very few people do. And many of them experienced much hardship and pain along the

way. And will continue to experience that hardship.We live in a culture where it’s almost a damnation to be considered mediocre. But society

has no clue about what real mastery is. Don’t listen to any of the “Top 10 things…” articles. Don’t listen to anyone. Not even me.Freud has said that our two goals in life are human connection and achievement.But often it’s a reasonable goal to overcome these evolutionary inclinations.To be happy with your loved ones. To be satisfied for every gift in your life, for every

moment, not rushing to the next moment of mastery. True mastery can be found right here, right now.

Choosing yourself right now in how you treat yourself, how you treat the people around you, how you treat your efforts and your loves.

Nothing is more important than this. Nothing compounds into greater happiness in life more than this.

Because when you rush to get to a mythical THERE, one day you will arrive and realize you missed all of the pleasures and mysteries along the way.

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I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

—Maya Angelou, African-American poet


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Things The Most Successful People Do That Make Them Great

By Eric Barker

There’s A Right Way To Learn

Want to be more successful? Actually, that’s not ambitious enough — want to be the best?I do. So I called my friend Daniel Coyle, author of the best books on getting better at

anything: The Talent Code and The Little Book of Talent.Dan knows that the “10,000 hour rule” is nice but you need to align your effort with the

way your brain was designed to learn.Hours are vital but you can get to mastery faster — much faster — by practicing the right way.So how can you and I do that? Here are some steps experts use:

1) Be Uncomfortable

You learn best when you’re reaching. “Flow” is great. But flow is not the best way to learn.

You want to be stretched to the edge of your ability. It needs to be hard. That’s how your brain grows.

Here’s Dan:

We learn when we’re in our discomfort zone. When you’re struggling, that’s when you’re getting smarter. The more time you spend there, the faster you learn. It’s better to spend a very, very high quality ten minutes, or even ten seconds, than it is to spend a mediocre hour. You want to practice where you are on the edge of your ability, reaching over and over again, making mistakes, failing, realizing those mistakes and reaching again.

More on the best way for you to practice here.

2) Stop Reading. Start Doing.

Keep the “Rule of Two-Thirds” in mind. Spend only one third of your time studying.


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The other two-thirds of your time you want to be doing the activity. Practicing. Testing yourself.

Get your nose out of that book. Avoid the classroom. Whatever it is you want to be the best at, be doing it.

The closer your practice is to the real thing, the faster you learn.

Here’s Dan:

Our brains evolved to learn by doing things, not by hearing about them. This is one of the reasons that, for a lot of skills, it’s much better to spend about two thirds of your time testing yourself on it rather than absorbing it. There’s a rule of two thirds. If you want to, say, memorize a passage, it’s better to spend 30 percent of your time reading it, and the other 70 percent of your time testing yourself on that knowledge.

More on how to shift from reading to doing here.

3) The Sweet Spot

You want to be successful 60-80% of the time when training. That’s the sweet spot for improvement.

When learning is too hard, we quit. When it’s too easy… well, we quit then too.

Always be upping the challenge to stay in that 60-80% zone.

Here’s Dan:

You don’t want to be succeeding 40 percent of the time. That’s flailing around. You don’t want to be succeeding 95 percent of the time. That’s too easy. You want to constantly be toggling, adjusting the environment so that you’re succeeding 60 to 80 percent of the time.

4) Commit To The Long Term

Asking someone ”How long are you going to be doing this?” was the best predictor of how skilled that person would end up being.

Merely committing to the long haul had huge effects.

Here’s Dan:


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The question that ended up being the most predictive of skill was “How long are you going to be doing this?”

Commitment was the difference maker. The people who combined commitment with a little bit of practice, their skills went off the charts.

Commit to the long haul. Don’t give up. Even works for mice:

5) Find A Role Model

Watching the best people work is one of the most powerful things you can do.

It’s motivating, inspiring and it’s how you were built to learn. Study the best to be the best.

Here’s Dan:

When we stare at someone we want to become and we have a really clear idea of where we want to be, it unlocks a tremendous amount of energy. We’re social creatures, and when we get the idea that we want to join some enchanted circle up above us, that is what really lights up motivation. “Look, they did it. I can do it.” It sounds very basic, but spending time staring at the best can be one of the most powerful things you do.

More on finding the best mentor for you here.

If You Only Remember Two Words From This…

Dan says the two key words are “Reach” and “Stare.”

Reach: Always push yourself to the edge of your ability. Get into your discomfort zone and reach past that.

Stare: Look at those better than you and emulate them. Find somebody you want to be in two years, three years, five years, and stare at that person. See what they’re doing. See exactly what they’re doing, and steal that. Steal from them.

You weren’t born an expert.

But you can become one with practice and time. Start now. You’ll be amazed at what you can achieve.

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There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.

—Madeleine Albright


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MASTERY

What Would Happen If You Improved Everything by 1%: The Science of Marginal Gains

By James Clear

In 2010, Dave Brailsford faced a tough job.No British cyclist had ever won the Tour de France, but as the new General Manager and

Performance Director for Team Sky (Great Britain’s professional cycling team), that’s what Brailsford was asked to do.

His approach was simple.Brailsford believed in a concept that he referred to as the “aggregation of marginal gains.”

He explained it as the “1 percent margin for improvement in everything you do.” His belief was that if you improved every area related to cycling by just 1 percent, then those small gains would add up to remarkable improvement.

They started by optimizing the things you might expect: the nutrition of riders, their weekly training program, the ergonomics of the bike seat, and the weight of the tires.

But Brailsford and his team didn’t stop there. They searched for 1 percent improvements in tiny areas that were overlooked by almost everyone else: discovering the pillow that offered the best sleep and taking it with them to hotels, testing for the most effective type of massage gel, and teaching riders the best way to wash their hands to avoid infection. They searched for 1 percent improvements everywhere.

Brailsford believed that if they could successfully execute this strategy, then Team Sky would be in a position to win the Tour de France in five years time.

He was wrong. They won it in three years.In 2012, Team Sky rider Sir Bradley Wiggins became the first British cyclist to win the Tour

de France. That same year, Brailsford coached the British cycling team at the 2012 Olympic Games and dominated the competition by winning 70 percent of the gold medals available.


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In 2013, Team Sky repeated their feat by winning the Tour de France again, this time with rider Chris Froome. Many have referred to the British cycling feats in the Olympics and the Tour de France over the past 10 years as the most successful run in modern cycling history.

And now for the important question: what can we learn from Brailsford’s approach?

The Aggregation of Marginal Gains

It’s so easy to overestimate the importance of one defining moment and underestimate the value of making better decisions on a daily basis.

Almost every habit that you have — good or bad — is the result of many small decisions over time.

And yet, how easily we forget this when we want to make a change.So often we convince ourselves that change is only meaningful if there is some large, visible

outcome associated with it. Whether it is losing weight, building a business, traveling the world or any other goal, we often put pressure on ourselves to make some earth-shattering improvement that everyone will talk about.

Meanwhile, improving by just 1 percent isn’t notable (and sometimes it isn’t even noticeable). But it can be just as meaningful, especially in the long run.

And from what I can tell, this pattern works the same way in reverse. (An aggregation of marginal losses, in other words.) If you find yourself stuck with bad habits or poor results, it’s usually not because something happened overnight. It’s the sum of many small choices — a 1 percent decline here and there — that eventually leads to a problem.

In the beginning, there is basically no difference between making a choice that is 1% better or 1% worse. (In other words, it won’t impact you very much today.) But as time goes on, these small improvements or declines compound and you suddenly find a very big gap between people who make slightly better decisions on a daily basis and those who don’t. This is why small choices (“I’ll take a burger and fries”) don’t make much of a difference at the time, but add up over the long-term.

On a related note, this is why I love setting a schedule for important things, planning for failure, and using the “never miss twice” rule. I know that it’s not a big deal if I make a mistake or slip up on a habit every now and then. It’s the compound effect of never getting back on track that causes problems. By setting a schedule to never miss twice, you can prevent simple errors from snowballing out of control.

The Bottom Line

Success is a few simple disciplines, practiced every day; while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day.

—Jim Rohn


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You probably won’t find yourself in the Tour de France anytime soon, but the concept of aggregating marginal gains can be useful all the same.

Most people love to talk about success (and life in general) as an event. We talk about losing 50 pounds or building a successful business or winning the Tour de France as if they are events. But the truth is that most of the significant things in life aren’t stand-alone events, but rather the sum of all the moments when we chose to do things 1 percent better or 1 percent worse. Aggregating these marginal gains makes a difference.

There is power in small wins and slow gains. This is why average speed yields above average results. This is why the system is greater than the goal. This is why mastering your habits is more important than achieving a certain outcome.

Where are the 1 percent improvements in your life?

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I used to walk down the street like I was a super star…

I want people to walk around delusional about how great they can be and then to fight so hard for it every day that the lie becomes the truth.

—Lady Gaga


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Astonish The Clients You Have And Astonish The Ones You Don’t Have Yet from How to Sell by James Altucher

Over-Deliver

If someone pays $100 and you give them just $100 in value then you just failed. F.A.I.L.E.D.You’ll never sell to that person again. That’s fine in some situations, but in most situations

it’s no good. If someone pays $100, you need to give them $110 worth of value.Think of that extra $10 as going into some sort of karmic bank account that pays interest

(as opposed to a U.S. bank account). That money grows and compounds. Eventually, there’s real wealth there. And that wealth translates into wealth in the real world.

People are three-year-olds. They like to get presents.People want to do business with people who give them presents. Over-delivering is a

present. And it makes you feel good. Give and you will receive.

Welcome To The Pleasure Dome

Your best new customers are your old customers. If you need to make more money or build new business then go to your customers (who are now your friends) and ask them, “I need advice. What other service can I provide you or anyone you know.”

It might be something totally unrelated to your business. No problem. Do it. It might be your customer is looking for a new job. That’s great. Make it your business to find him a new job. Now you have a new customer.

It might be your customer needs a boyfriend. Ok, introduce her to all of your friends who might be good for her. If you’ve been following this approach to sales then your customers are now your friends, are now your family, are now the lifeblood of how you wake up in the morning.

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Woman must not accept; she must challenge.

She must not be awed by that which has been built up around her;

she must reverence that woman in her which struggles for expression.

—Margaret Sanger, founder of Planned Parenthood


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Why MANY Smart People Don’t Get the Support They Deserve

By Rajesh Setty

You may have experienced this (or might have seen someone go through this situation) – you are on to something big and need a LOT of help but even people who have known you for a while are not actively supporting you in your quest. They seem to listen to everything and say encouraging words about your adventure but when it comes to doing something, they shy away from it.

It bothers you because you have known these people for a LONG time and these are some people that you would totally expect 100% support from. They should be the ones that should fully understand your potential and lend their hand.

What could be wrong?

As part of my mini-research, I talked to dozens of people who have been through this situation. My quest was to find a pattern and use that understanding to see how smart people can get unstuck when they are faced with such a situation.

While I could find a number of reasons, none of them could be as strong as the burden of the story gap. Let me share this in detail below and follow that up with a few ideas to relieve yourself of that burden.

The Burden of the Story Gap

There is a difference betweena) Your true potentialb) Your potential as perceived by your core groupPick a time a few years ago when both (a) and (b) were approximately at the same level.

For this example, let’s take a snapshot of time five years ago. Your core group of friends have probably watched you from close quarters and have seen you accomplish things. It was NOT difficult for them to assess your potential based on the results you are producing.

BUT, there was a limitation.

What they could not see was what you were doing when you were not around them. The investment you were making in yourself to grow an become better. Everyone grows but you


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decide to invest disproportionately more in yourself than what the average professionals will invest in themselves to learn and grow. Naturally, your growth trajectory is different from what you see with average professionals.

In a span of few years, your potential is at a level that’s vasty superior to that of the average professionals around you.

You know it and you can feel it.There is a gap.It’s the story gap between your true potential and your potential as perceived by your

core group.It seems like common for your core group to assume a traditional growth path for you

because that’s what they are seeing in everyone else around you. To add to that, you DON’T have superior accomplishments to prove to them otherwise. You have the competence, capacity and drive to get there and that’s where you need help but without those superior accomplishments, they don’t have enough reasons for them to believe that you are indeed DIFFERENT. It’s a catch-22 situation.

As long as there is a story gap, you will get support for your projects that they believe could be achieved by your “perceived potential” and not those that can be accomplished through your true potential.

What can you do now?

Simply stated, you need to bridge the story gap for them start seeing your true potential.Here are some ways to get started:

1. Progressive Micro and Mini-Accomplishments Along the Way:

Your ambitions may be sky-high but you get there step by step, via micro and mini accomplishments along the way. Preparation is very important but you have to provide a way for people to say that you are on a different trajectory of growth as compared to others.

2. Extend Valuable Help

An act of valuable help not only is good for those that got that help but it’s also good for YOU. Whatever skills you are providing valuable help with are the skills that you are strengthening. When you provide that kind of help time and again, you win in the short-term and the long-term


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3. Tell Your Story via Lessons Learned

This is about not simply telling your story but the lessons learned as you went on a meaningful quest. Simply telling your story is akin to tooting your own horn. When you extract the lessons from your various quests, your story turns into a gift – an education for those that are thinking of similar paths.

Remember that those that have known you for a long time have a certain view about you and only you and your contributions can bridge the story gap.

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I look at the way children handle disappointment. They cry. They get upset.

And then they get over it. And then it’s really over.

They don’t remember why they were upset.

So for me that’s really the dream, to be like a child.

—Arianna Huffington


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THE POWER OF GREAT QUESTIONS

The Phoenix Checklist: Innovation By The CIA By Marty Baker

Courtesy of the great Michael Michalko, I discovered The Phoenix Checklist in 1991 and have used it in Inotivity Workshops as a great method understanding and reframing a problem or challenge.

Michalko is one of the most highly acclaimed creativity experts in the world and author of what I consider one of the best books on creative thinking techniques. As an officer in the United States Army, Michael organized a team of NATO intelligence specialists and international academics in Frankfurt, Germany, to research, collect, and categorize all known inventive-thinking methods.

After leaving the military, Michael facilitated CIA think tanks using his creative thinking techniques. Michael later applied these creative-thinking techniques to problems in the corporate world with outstanding successes.

Michael credits the CIA with developing the list –which encouraged agents to look at problems from many different angles. He meant the list to be dynamic – for people to add new questions as they faced new challenges.

He adds, “Solving a challenge is like walking a tightrope. If the rope is too slack, you will fall; if it is too tight, it has no resiliency, and you will also fall. The rope must be continually adjusted and supported at its weakest point. In the same way, asking questions ill constantly adjust and support lines of speculation as you tiptoe towards a solution.”

One of the key concepts Dana Montenegro of Seriously Creative and I teach in workshops, is for clients to do a deep dive on whether a problem is a problem or a merely a symptom of a bigger problem.


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Here’s Michael’s Blueprint:

1. Write your challenge. Isolate the challenge you want to think about and commit yourself to an answer by a certain date.

2. Ask questions. Use the checklist to dissect the challenge into a variety of areas.

3. Record your answers.

The problem

1. Why is it necessary to solve the problem?

2. What benefits will you receive by solving the problem?

3. What is the unknown?

4. What is it you don’t yet understand?

5. What is the information you have?

6. What isn’t the problem?

7. Is the information sufficient? Or is it insufficient? Or redundant? Or contradictory?

8. Should you draw a diagram of the problem? A figure?

9. Where are the boundaries of the problem?

10. Can you separate the various parts of the problem? Can you write them down? What are the relationships of the parts of the problem? What are the constants of the problem?

11. Have you seen this problem before?

12. Have you seen this problem in a slightly different form? Do you know a related problem?

13. Try to think of a familiar problem having the same or a similar unknown

14. Suppose you find a problem related to yours that has already been solved. Can you use it? Can you use its method?

15. Can you restate your problem? How many different ways can you restate it? More general? More specific? Can the rules be changed?

16. What are the best, worst and most probable cases you can imagine?

17. The plan

18. Can you solve the whole problem? Part of the problem?

19. What would you like the resolution to be? Can you picture it?


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20. How much of the unknown can you determine?

21. Can you derive something useful from the information you have?

22. Have you used all the information?

23. Have you taken into account all essential notions in the problem?

24. Can you separate the steps in the problem-solving process? Can you determine the correctness of each step?

25. What creative thinking techniques can you use to generate ideas? How many different techniques?

26. Can you see the result? How many different kinds of results can you see?

27. How many different ways have you tried to solve the problem?

28. What have others done?

29. Can you intuit the solution? Can you check the result?

30. What should be done? How should it be done?

31. Where should it be done?

32. When should it be done?

33. Who should do it?

34. What do you need to do at this time?

35. Who will be responsible for what?

36. Can you use this problem to solve some other problem?

37. What is the unique set of qualities that makes this problem what it is and none other?

38. What milestones can best mark your progress?

39. How will you know when you are successful?

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Don’t be intimidated by what you don’t know. That can be your greatest strength and ensure that you do things differently from everyone else.

—Sara Blakely, Founder of Spanx & world’s youngest female billionaire


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How To Ask All the Wrong Questions By Daniel Koontz

Way, way back in the early days of my blogging, an acquaintance who wanted to start a blog emailed me with several questions:

What do you do for database backup?Where do you host your blog?How do you scale up when your readership grows?And so on. They were all very interesting, intelligent-sounding questions. And seemingly reasonable

questions too, considering that this woman worked in a technical field.Except that every single one of her questions turned out to be wrong.Why? Because barely a month or two after she (enthusiastically!) started her blog, she just

...dropped it. She wrote a grand total of four posts.Four posts. And she hasn’t touched her blog since.So, all those questions about scaling up, about hosting, about database backup—none of

them mattered in the slightest. They were the wrong questions.

You don’t know what you don’t know

Whenever we consider a brand new activity—investing, blogging, cooking, playing tennis, etc.—we always think we know more than we do. It’s when we actually start doing the activity that we come face to face with a real sense of how pathetically little we know.

In fact, our first step towards competence in any new field only comes when we truly wrap our minds around our incompetence. You have to accept and face the disheartening knowledge that you have a long way—a really long way—to go.

In other words, my friend knew so little about blogging that she didn’t even know the right questions to ask. She couldn’t know. Worse, the questions she did ask merely caused her to focus on all the wrong things. Forget worrying about how to back up her blog, she should have been trying to figure out what would make blogging fun enough so she wouldn’t quit after four posts.

Wrong about tennis

Another example: Let’s say you decide to take up tennis. You’re in a sports equipment store, nibbling on your fingernail and staring at a wall of tennis racquets. And when the


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tennis racquet salesperson approaches you, a (seemingly) reasonable question might occur to you: what string tension I should use for my racquet?

Sounds intelligent, right? Except that anyone who’s played tennis seriously for any amount of time would laugh uproariously at you for asking it.

Once again: know that your first questions are likely the wrong questions. The only person who will pretend this is the right question is the tennis racquet salesperson, as he attempts to sell you an overpriced $300 racquet.

Worst of all, that $300 racquet raises the stakes. It puts pressure on you to maximize your enjoyment out of tennis, and it may actually increase the chances that you’ll quit the sport in short order.

Better to just go out and spend a summer or two hitting ten thousand balls with an inexpensive, or even a second-hand, racquet. Learn how to keep a ball in play for twenty hits without a miss. Then you’ll be competent enough to ask informed questions about proper string tension, what kind of racquet is ideal, what tools you need to add to your game, and so on.

This principle applies to all spots: running, golf, even beanbag tossing. Never buy expensive equipment up front. Wait until you actually know what you

need to know.

Wrong about Martha

One last example, from the domain of food: Let’s say you decide to take up cooking, and you’re wondering who to turn to in the food media for help on how and what to cook. You might reasonably look to Martha Stewart and all of her recipe ideas. After all, she’s famous for her cooking, isn’t she? She’s on TV and has her own magazine, right? Wouldn’t it be a great idea to try some of her recipes and techniques?

Nope. Any competent home cook would shake his head at your folly. Why? Because, as any Casual Kitchen reader could tell you, leaping to Martha Stewart-style recipes at the beginning of a home cooking careeractually reduces the odds that you’ll continue to cook. You’re more likely to quit in frustration.

The point is this: when you start a new discipline, know that most of your questions, presumptions and ideas about that discipline will be wrong. Wrong in ways you never even imagined. Know this in advance.

Being rightOkay. So what are the right questions then? Here’s what to ask an expert in any field that’s

completely new to you:

1. What are the most common mistakes that you typically see beginning [bloggers/tennis players/coaches] make?

2. What should I be learning as a new person starting to [blog/play tennis/coach]


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3. What did you find to be some of the unexpected early challenges of [blogging/playing tennis/coaching]

4. What questions haven’t I asked you that I should ask?

What’s the takeaway here?

Primarily this: the questioner doesn’t launch into a line of questions assuming she already knows. None of these are showoff questions that advertise the questioner’s expertise. Instead, each question is asked from a place of humility: this questioner knows she doesn’t know.

This is how to take up [coaching] and not quit.

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Don’t let anyone rob you of your imagination, your creativity, or your curiosity.

It’s your place in the world; it’s your life. Go on and do all you can with it and make it the life you want to live.

—Mae C. Jemison, first African-American woman astronaut


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The 5 Questions Every Company Should Ask Itself By Suhit Anantula

If you do not know how to ask the right question, you discover nothing.

—W. Edwards Deming (American statistician and expert on innovation)

Reading Drucker many years back one think stuck with me – his focus on asking the right questions. I found that very hard at the start and eventually I learned to ask questions, starting with small ones and then big and bold ones. If you want to create change, if you want to be innovative you have to ask big and bold questions for your organisation. It is key to creating value.

My colleague Elise pointed me to a FastCompany article by Warren Berger on 5 questions from various business thinkers.

1. What is our company’s purpose on this earth? by Keith Yamashita

Why do you exist? What do you see as the reason for your existence? Big questions that should provide a lot of clarity.

2. What should we stop doing? by Jack Bergstrand

This is such a powerful question. In my work I discuss the Drucker question of “abandonment”. What are you willing to abandon to make space for the new?

3. If we didn’t have an existing business, how could we best build a new one? by Clayton Christensen

This is a good “what if” question to rethink your current business?

4. Where is our Petri dish? by Tim Ogilvie

Experimentation is the key for innovation however, you cannot do it everywhere. Tim asks, where in your organisation can you experiment?


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5. How can we make a better experiment? by Eric Ries

In the lean start up world, we live and die by experiments. The goal is learning by experimentation.

My focus is on continuing to develop the ability to ask the right questions, especially the bold ones. If you want to create change and innovate, you have not choice but to ask the big questions.


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“This Time is Different” By Shane Parrish

When we look at situations we’re always looking for what’s unique. We should, however, give more thought to similarities.

“This time is different” could be the 4 most costly words ever spoken. It’s not the words that are costly so much as the conclusions they encourage us to draw.

We incorrectly think that differences are more valuable than similarities.After all, anyone can see what’s the same but it takes true insight to see what’s different,

right? We’re all so busy trying to find differences that we forget to pay attention to what is the same.

Imagine sitting in a meeting where people are about to make the same mistake they made last year on the same decision. Let’s say, for example, Jack has a history of messing up the annual tax returns. He’s a good guy. He’s nice to everyone. In fact, he buys everyone awesome Christmas presents. But the last three years—the period he’s been in charge of tax returns—have been nothing short of a disaster causing more work for you and your department.

The assignment for the tax return comes up and Jack is once again nominated.Before you have a chance to voice your concerns, one of your co-workers speaks up: “I know

Jack has dropped the ball on this assignment in the past but I think this time is different. He’s been working hard to make sure he’s better organized.”

That’s all it takes. Conversation over — everyone is focused on what’s unique about this time and it’s unlikely, despite ample evidence, that you’ll be able to convince them otherwise.

In part, people want to believe in Jack because he’s a nice guy. In part, we’re all focused on why this time is different and we’ll ignore evidence to the contrary.

Focusing on what’s different makes it easy to forget historical context. We lose touch with the base rate. We only see the evidence that supports our view (confirmation bias). We become optimistic and overconfident.

History provides context. And what history shows us is that no matter how unique things are today there are a lot of similarities with the past.

Consider investors and the dotcom bubble. Collectively people saw this as unprecedented and unique, a massive transformation that was unparalleled.

That reasoning, combined with a blindness to what was the same about this situation and previous ones, encouraged us to draw conclusions that proved costly. We reasoned that everything would change and everyone who owned internet companies would prosper and the old non-internet companies would quickly go into bankruptcy.

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Do one thing every day that scares you.

– Eleanor Roosevelt


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All of a sudden profits didn’t matter. Nor did revenue. They would come in time, we hoped. Market share mattered no matter how costly it was to acquire.

More than that, if you didn’t buy now you’d miss out. These companies would take over the world and you’d be left out.

We got so caught up in what was different that we forgot to see what was the same.And there were historical parallels: Automobiles, Radio, Television, and Airplanes to

name a few. At the time these innovations completely transformed the world as well. You can consider them the dotcoms of yesteryear.

And how did these massively transformational industries end up for investors?At one time there were allegedly over 70 different auto manufacturing operations in the

United States. Only 3 of them survived (and a few of those even required government funds.)If you catch yourself reasoning based on “this time is different” remember that you are

probably speculating. While you may be right, odds are, this time is not different. You just haven’t looked for the similarities.

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I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.

—Rosa Parks


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APPENDIX

Rich Litvin

Rich Litvin is one of the world’s most exclusive success coaches. He specializes in working with high achievers and is an expert on deep, lasting, natural confidence.

Rich’s clients are by invitation and referral only. He has coached Olympic athletes, Presidential candidates, Hollywood film directors, emergency room physicians, British Special Forces operatives, millionaires and finance professionals managing over US$100 billion of assets.

Founder of The Confident Woman’s Salon and The High Achieving Introvert Project, he is a member of The Association of Transformational Leaders. Co-author of The Prosperous Coach, Rich supports coaches and consultants to build a thriving practice with just a few high-performing clients—with no internet marketing, no email list, not even a business card.

Rich lives his life based on one principle: Hell Yeah! or No. He proposed to his wife 10 days after he met her—and she said yes! Monique is an award-winning singer/songwriter and they are the proud parents of two very young boys.

He has lived and worked in eight countries and on four continents. Born in England, he still has an adorable British accent and now spends his time between Los Angeles and London. A former teacher, he taught students in rural Africa, inner-city London and the son of the world’s wealthiest man.

Rich still gets nervous walking into a party and can be reached at www.richlitvin.com.


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Monique DeBose

Monique DeBose is an award-winning singer/songwriter. Influenced by Duke Ellington, John Coltrane and Ella Fitzgerald, Monique found her voice through the world of jazz and has honed her chops with some of the most world’s most celebrated vocal coaches. Monique has performed across the United States and Europe, as well as in India and China.

She has written, co-produced and recorded two full length studio albums: Choose The Experience Vol. 1: Ready for Love, and Choose The Experience Vol. 2: Closer. She is currently writing new material for her third album, The Tragic Mulatto Chronicles.

Monique is a gifted teacher of Vocal Improv and she teaches the skills that that Hollywood’s top singers, actors and improvisers employ to thrill audiences and spectators. Her training solutions are challenging and fun.

Monique helps performers and executives to think quickly on their feet in high pressure/high stake situations such as a public speaking engagements or big client pitches. The ability to master your inner experience in a “high stakes” situation is crucial—whilst remaining present to what is happening in the room. She helps her clients to reframe the internal “I can’t” dialogue that runs unchecked like a broken record when you are faced with a difficult situation. And she helps clients people build their natural leadership skills and increase their influence.

Monique currently resides in Los Angeles with her husband Rich and their two sons, 2 year old Kaleo Rex and 2 month old Ellington Madiba.

www.moniquedebose.com


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Alexis Neely / Ali Shanti

After graduating first in her class from Georgetown law, Alexis started her own law practice serving families and small business owners in Redondo Beach, CA and created a highly successful new law business model that allowed her to build a million dollar law business while working just a few days a week in her office.

She then founded several companies, including Family Wealth Planning Institute, which teaches parents how to leave a legacy of real wealth to the people they love and LIFT Foundation System, which teaches legal, insurance, financial and tax systems to service-focused entrepreneurs, New Law Business Model, which is transforming the way legal services are provided across the globe, and Eyes Wide Open Life, which guides entrepreneurs and those who want to be to step into the new economy.

In her free time, Alexis wrote the best-selling book on legal planning for parents, Wear Clean Underwear, and is at work on her next book that will radically transform our relationship with money, debt and credit, titled You Are Not Your Credit Score. She was recognized by Worth Magazine two years in a row as one of the country’s top 100 lawyers and has appeared on the Today Show, Good Morning America, the O’Reilly Factor, Nancy Grace, CNBC’s On the Money, and many other television and radio programs as a legal expert. Alexis lives in Boulder, CO with her two kids, her ex-husband, and her life/business partner.

YOUR GIFT: Money Map – the Truth-Telling Modules

If you’re serious about having a life and business that is in deep alignment with the truth of who you are, the reason you came here and how you want to be in the world, and puts exactly the amount of money you need in your bank account each month without worrying about where it’s going to come from, this is the program for you. The Secret Is In Your Truth! This program retails at $497, and we’re giving you a 100% coupon code as our gift to you. Just sign up at www.moneymaptofreedom.com/truth with coupon code: FREETOOL.


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Five frogs are sitting on a log Adapted from The Prosperous Coach

There’ s an old riddle that says five frogs are sitting on a log. Four decide to jump off. How many are left?

What’s your answer?

Take your time.

No rush.

Take a moment to consider your answer.

How many are left?

The answer is five.

Why? Because four “decided” to jump off. That’s all they did. And there’s a big difference between deciding and doing.

You don’t need more information.

It’s time to jump off the log.

Decide what tiny action you will take today to create your next client.

And then take it.

Don’t wait for one-hundred percent readiness. It will never come. When you are eighty percent ready, go for it. Run straight at it. Get exposed. Risk messing up.

Failing is not a problem you will face.

Failing is how you get there.

Love. Rich


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Documents

Prosperous Coach - THE EXTRAORDINARY WOMANtheprosperouscoach.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/... · 2014. 3. 28. · • you coach extraordinary clients. • you are an extraordinary