Reasearch Assm., Reviewed

8/8/2019 Reasearch Assm., Reviewed

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Pearson Tutor Services Response

Student Name: Jessica

Title: Research Assignment

Date: October 27, 2010

Tutor Name: Casey

Hi, Jessica,

Im Casey, your tutor for todays session.

Summary:

This is a research paper on the career youd like to pursue and how adult learning theories will

help you as you pursue this goal.

Strengths of the Writing:

It works well that you organize your paper by first discussing the career youd like to pursue and

the skills you need, then moving into adult learning theory in the second part of the paper. This

strategy separates out the two main elements of the assignment and helps the reader follow

the paper.

Content:

a) Thesis/Main Idea:

Most research papers include a main idea or thesis statement early on in the paper that

identifies the writers purpose in writing. Your paper seems to lack such a statement, and as a

result the reader may be confused about why youre writing and may have trouble following

your ideas. This statement is generally:

y a declarative sentence (or two or three)

y clear and precise

y placed at the end of the first paragraph or early in the essay after an introduction

y a reflection of the topics discussed in the body paragraphs


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These statements might seem like your thesis/main idea statement:A few goals i would like to

per sure while working in this Field is working for a major fashion magazine as a fashion editor

also to be a buyer for a company and working on fashion runways. There is different Fields in

fashion, but there are a handful of skills that you will need for this career.

However, it doesnt come at the end of the paragraph, and you dont organize your discussion

by these topics.This first part of your essay is difficult to follow because you move from talking

about marketing to merchandising, and its not clear if these are parts of the field you are

interested in or if these are skills you need or what logic is guiding this discussion.

The first step to organizing your discussion would be writing a thesis statement that reflects

your main idea, your purpose for writing this essay. Such a thesis statement might look

something like this, as I draw on some of your statement that is already there:

My degree in fashion marketing and design will allow me to reach my goals ofworking

for a major fashion magazine as a fashion editor also to be a buyer for a company and

working on fashion runways. There are a handful of skills that I will need in this field,

including marketing, merchandising, and XYZ. Understanding adult learning theories

will help me be successful because XYZ.

This is just one example. Write a thesis statement that reflects the elements you will discuss in

your body paragraphs. Place it at the end of the first paragraph. The XYZ are placeholders for

whatever ideas you think fit there best /however you want to direct your discussion.

Organization:Once you write a thesis statement, use it as a guide to organize and structure your body

paragraphs.

I also notice that you seem to have placed your title page and abstract after the text of your

paper, rather than before it, where they are generally placed. The abstracts purpose is to

prepare the reader for the content of the paper, as a type of preview, so it makes sense that

it comes before. You will want to move the title page and the abstract to come before the text

of your paper.

Use of Resources:

APA format requires a references page at the end of your essay that lists the sources you

used. You dont seem to include one. You also dont seem to be using correct conventions of

APA style that help your reader understand whether you are quoting, paraphrasing, or citing a

source and what material comes from the source.


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Please see the tip sheet on using APA for this assignment. This tip sheet has been pasted to the

end of your document. For more help with APA style and for specific questions, please talk to

your facilitator or refer to the style manual or other resources recommended by your

facilitator.

Action Plan:

1) Write a main idea/thesis statement and place it at the end of the first paragraph.

2) Revise your body paragraphs to reflect the topics in that main idea statement.

3) Move your abstract and title page before the text of your paper.

4) Be sure all of your sources are relevant to your discussion, introduced, explained, and

properly cited. Review the APA tip sheet.

5) Proofread and spell check the essay before resubmitting it to Pearson Tutor Services

or posting it to your professor.

Hope this helps. Happy Writing!

Casey


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Jessica Grice

Academic and Professional Success

10/25/210

Research Assignment

The career that I'm going to pursue is Fashion Marketing and design. This fast

pace environment is something I look ford to doing. The fashion industry is the type of

career where you learn more than just fashion. A few goals i would like to per sure while

working in this Field is working for a major fashion magazine as a fashion editor also to

be a buyer for a company and working on fashion runways. [Do you discuss being a

fashion editor at any point throughout the essay? If you mention it, you should develop that

idea.] There is different Fields in fashion, but there are a handful of skills that you will

need for this career. [Which fields would you like to pursue?] Marketing is a very important

skill you will need to track sales data, know what the costumer want in the future so you

can work with the designers. Marketers are responsible for helping the fashion

producers target customers. You must know the wholesale and retail levels, also to

know where and when to sell the products. Marketing also involves adverting to the

media and so on with quality, low price or trendiness.

This is also related to merchandising a career that i really in joy. [This

seems like a new idea the way its phrased. Can you connect it to your main idea?] It

attempts improve sales and includes the costumers to buy the products like


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marketing, with merchandising you must know when, where and why youre

selling the right costumers. Fashion merchandisers must inform the marketers

about what the costumers and the next fashion trends. Without fashion shows

the fashion industry would not be the same. These are primary and at fashion

journalists and buyers for department stores whole sales and other markets. You

must know of every fashion show, and market producers. Present outfits that

might be ordered by potential clients.

Fashion designers play a major role in the fashion world and a great skill

everyone should have. Designers promote and make their clothes to buyers, journalist,

retailers and costumers. Helping out with fashion shows and magazines being in

fashion merchandising is something I want to be. Working in the fashion industry you

must know more that your degree in fashion marketing and design will prepare me in

this field. In marketing it have so many position and design to have twice are more it

covers everything O would need and will help me get to me career.

There are many ways to explain the adults learning theory. Children threw out

their hole elementary through high school youve been thought to learn a certain way.

Now the challenge is. Is one decides to contain in higher learning , there are different

learning theories too must obtain, : adults are about to chase the appropriate

synchronous learning tools are different levels of interaction using adult learning

principles, they are able to learn effectively (murugian, 2005). In this essay explain

what adult learning theories works best for me and why it is important for others to

options this in everyday life situations.


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In my study in fashion marketing, cooperative learning is very important.

Cooperative learning is one of the most commonly used forms of active pedagogy. Its

takes places with ones interaction with his or hers environment and peers, cooperative

learning is largely based on the idea that students learn through social context (Adams

and Hamm 1994). When thinking about cooperative learning I believe it will help me

with the environment is what will make you successful. Interaction with others helps

makes sense of what Im learning as I become more responsible for articulating and

discussing class issues with peers or any other life situation threw your adult life. Its

very important that cooperative learning be a part of my very day life. In the fashion

industry, Interaction and communication is a must. Being the person I am I can see

myself doing this? My career goals are to be a buyer, work for magazines, and work on

fashion runways; this also connects with action learning. Threw action learning I will

develop a conversation and interaction with people working in that business. Action

learning is a pedagogical practice that helps participant. (Fox, 2008) [Is this a quote or a

paraphrase? Introduce it and place it in context.] in my major you are learning is for

everyone it needs to be a learned and understood.

Adult learning theory helps us to understand the needs of people as they

learn and make meaning as stated in Knowles adult learning principles. First among

these theorists is, Malcolm Knowles (1980). His theory provides centered guidelines for

adults. I will state a few, Adults must recognize the necessity of learning something

before undertaking to learn it; Adults recognize responsible for their own decision for

their own lives; Adults enter an educational experience with more and different

experience that youths. All these theories are very helpful for my college career and


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beyond that. Adult learning theory helps us to understand the right needs for us to learn

and make meaning of them.

Addressing APA Documentation and Formatting:

A Pearson Tutor Services Tutorial for AIU Students

This tip sheet for APA has been developed by Pearson Tutor Services to help you build your

skills in using APA style documentation and document development.

The Research GoalsReports produced in disciplines that would use APA style stress observations of behavior, self-reporting

from behavior subjects (interviews), surveys and questionnaire, and experiments. Thus, reports

generally have certain sections:

y Front matter (title page with running heading)

y Abstract (second page)

y Report

o Introductory section:

Summary or review of research

Main idea (reason for writing the report), which can be stated as a hypothesis ora research question

o Body of the text (which can include types of development such as):

Case study analysis

Problem-solving analysis

Research from original experimentation

Research from other sources

o Concluding section:

Summary of findings or main points

Articulation of conclusion, which can be the response to the research question

or the verification /debunking of the hypothesis

y References page (list of resources)y Appendices (if appropriate)

Documentation: In-text CitationsRegardless of what reference style you use, the important common features are:

y Accurate quoting and/or paraphrase


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y The need to cue the reader when borrowing begins (i.e., reference to a study, source,

etc. or the use of opening quotation marks)

y The need to cue the reader when the borrowing has ended (i.e., closing quotation marks

if text has been quoted; parenthetical citation if it didnt come earlier in the sentence)

y A sentence that explains the relevance of the borrowed material to the development of

the reporty A complete bibliographic entry for each source cited in the text in a references-type

section of the essay, usually at the end of the document

With APA documentation, place the in-text citation as close to the borrowed material as possible. For

example:

1) Brown (2009) argued that consumption of chocolate is crucial for students in

communications business classes because it helps them to focus on their work.

Notice that in example 1, the author (Brown) is a grammatical part of the sentence. In this case, the lack

of quotation marks indicates that the writer is paraphrasing Brown.

2) The definitive study (Williams, 1999) established the positive impact on thecerebral cortex of college students, enhancing the ability to accurately identify

strong communications practices and to provide support for why those practices

would strengthen a businesss team structure (p. 32).

In this case, the author (Williams) is not a grammatical part of the sentence. Also, the use of quotation

marks indicates that the quoted phrase has been copied word-for-word from Williams. Try to make less

than 10% of your paper actual quotes because your research is supposed to support your ideasnot to

be your entire paper! The page reference follows at the end of the sentence in which the quote is found.

3) According to Hewett (2008), senior managers reported that employees who

struggle with when and how to use email appropriately generally claim not to have

ingested chocolate within four hours of their attempted communication (p. 16).In the case of example 3, the author (Hewett) is introduced as the one being quoted. The page reference

follows at the end of the sentence.

When quotations are 40 words or longer, type them as inset, or block, without quotation marks. Place

a period at the end of the final sentence. Then place the in-text citation inside parentheses. For

example:

4) Chocolate has been known to help people before modern business found a use for

it:

Chocolates value as a stimulant has been known for a long time. It is only

recently that its unique properties have been used in such practical areas as

business communications. Employees who have used this relatively innocuous

cocoa product have reported amazing results, leading researchers to reflect that

chocolates properties are crucial to workers abilities to focus when addressing

especially challenging communication situations. (Brown, 2009, p. 64)

In example 4, the author of the lengthy quote was not introduced as a part of the quote introduction.

The introduction to a lengthy quote always includes a colon.


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Documentation: ReferencesIn APA, the resources are:

y Arranged alphabetically by the first word in the entry (usually the authors last name)

y Formatted using a hanging indent (use the appropriate special code under indents and

spacing in Word)

y

D

ouble-spaced

In APA, notice that:

1) An initial is used instead of the authors first name,

2) The date is placed next to the authors name, and

3) Capital letters are used only for the first words of a titles phrase.

APA Style

American Psychological Association (APA) 6th

edition

Book: 1

author

Williams, D. (1999). Writing in business.Wichita, KS:

Newman Press.

Book: 2authors

Hewett, B. L., & Cricket, J. (2008). Preparing workers for

business writing. Urbana, IL: NCTE.

Book: 3+

authors

Williams, D.,Warner, A., Ritke-Jones,W., and Brown, J.

(2010). Email communications. Baltimore, MD:

Hopkins Press.

Chapter

in an

editedcollection

Mouse, M. (2009).Whats the difference? Reinventing

email and employee experience. In A.Warner (Ed.)

Communicating in the workplace (pp. 23-30).

Wichita, KS: Newman Press.

Journal(print)

Kafka, J. (2006, November). The effects of internal emailon employee morale. Business Writing, 7(4), 33-41.

Journal(online

database)

Kafka, J. (2006, November). The effects of internal email

on employee morale. Business Writing, 7(4), 33-41.

Retrieved December 9, 2006 from EbscoHost

Database.

Web site Brown, J. (2000). A plan to take over the world of email.Retrieved December 9, 2004 from

http://www.gates.com/plan.htm

In-textcitations

(Williams, 1999, p. 2) [Notice how commas are needed

to separate the elements of author, date, and page.]

Reference

page

References

Formatting: Writing Style1. APA generally tends to avoid first person usage with scientific reports and some business

writing. Typically, the student should use the third person unless the professor says otherwise.


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2. APA recommends avoiding poetic language.

3. APA recommends avoiding biased language.

4. APA recommends using the past tense or present perfect tense with signal phrases that describe

earlier research.

a. Jones (1998) foundb. Jones (1998) has found


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Formatting: Appearance of the Text

EFFECTS OF CHOCOLATE 1

The Effects of Chocolate on Business Communications

Brittany Arnold

AIU University


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Abstract

This is a wonderful, short abstract. This report surveys research on

the impact of eating chocolate on the successful development of a

business communication. The cocoa bean has been shown to have a

positive impact on the identification of email, telephone, and Webinar

meeting communication strategies.

Note: The running head (EFFECTS OF CHOCOLATE) is a fully capitalized and shortened version of the

papers title. It is created using the header space provided in your word processing software. It is a

running head because it appears on each page with the current pages number.

Note: The Abstract is a summary of the main points of your essay. It summarizes the problems and

solutions presented, and it may cite some of the research used. The Abstract is page 2 of the report. It

does not take the place of an introduction to the report. It is helpful to write the abstract after you have

completed one or two drafts of the report.

APA Style uses a unique headings system to separate and classify paper sections. There are 5 heading

levels in APA. The 6th edition of the APA manual revises and simplifies previous heading guidelines.

Regardless of the number of levels, always use the headings in order, beginning with level 1. The format

of each level is illustrated below:

Level 1 Centered, Bold, Uppercase and Lowercase Heading

Level 2 Left-aligned, Bold, Uppercase and Lowercase Heading

Level 3 Indented, boldface, lowercase heading ending with a period.

Level 4 Indented, boldface, italicized, lowercase heading with a period.

Level 5 Indented, italicized, lowercase heading with a period.


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Thus, if the essay has four sections, some of which have subsections and some of which dont, use

headings depending on the level of subordination. Section headings receive level 1 format. Subsections

receive level 2 format. Subsections of subsections receive level 3 format, and so on.

In APA Style, the Introduction section never gets a heading and headings are not indicated by letters or

numbers. Levels of headings will depend upon the length and organization of your paper. Regardless,

always begin with level one headings and proceed to level two, etc. [When the text starts, the running

title continues, as does the pagination. Below, the levels of headings are illustrated.


The Effects of Chocolate on Business Communications

The introduction begins here without a heading and continues until

you have provided the background material and introduction to the

problem. Your current assignment requires an introduction. xxxxxxxxx

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Scenario 1 (Level 1)

Problem (Level 2) [Discuss each section of the essay thoroughly, using

outside sources for support.]

Proposed Solution (Level 2)

Scenario 2 (Level 1)

Problem (Level 2)

Proposed Solution (Level 2)

Conclusion (Level 1)

The conclusion can begin here without a level 2 subheading if there are

no second level points to be made.

[When needed:]

Level 3 looks like this. (Level 3)




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References

Brown, J. (2010). Just eat: Percentages of effective business emails and

chocolate consumption. The effective communicator. Retrieved

from http://www.businesschocolate.org

Kafka, J. (2006, November). The effects of internal email on employee

morale. Business Writing 7(4), 33-41.

Research Assignment

Jessica Grice

American Intercontinental University


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Fashion Marketing and Design

October 25, 2010

Fashion Marketing and design is a fast pace environment its something I look

forward to doing. The fashion industry is the type of career where you learn more than

just fashion, it is very hands on. Cooperative learning in the fashion industry is

interaction and communication and is a must. [The abstract should be placed before the

paper.]

Documents

Reasearch Assm., Reviewed