Religious sensitivities – respect begets respectAugust 1, 2013

FMT LETTER: From Ravinder Singh, via e-mail

So-called “religious sensitivity” is a thing of the mind. It is not something external like the heat from a fire that one can feel, but purely a state of mind. It is what one chooses to make of something. A thing done or said by someone to another of a different race or religion is seen one way by a broadminded person and another way by a narrow minded person. It is seen one way by a wise person and the opposite way by a fool. A rational person interprets it differently from an irrational person. In interpreting one should take into account the manner, tone, context, occasion, etc. in which it is said.

It is akin to a normal person seeing a rope for what it is, and a psychiatric patient seeing the same rope as a dangerous snake and trying to kill it before it attacks him. Remember, the mind is not only capable of playing games under different conditions and circumstances, it can also be conditioned into such a state by external hypnotic pressure. Such pressure can even make a normal person who is unable to resist such pressure, see the rope as a snake.

People’s minds can be manipulated by those who have power over them by the constant harping on something. Teachers, including BTN teachers, therefore have the great power of making or breaking a nation by what they teach their charges. Politicians, as leaders, also have such power. Knowing this, our former medical doctor Prime Minister had chosen the way of running his administration on the premise that telling a lie and repeating it would finally have the people believe it is the truth. But repeating lies is like blowing and blowing into a balloon. Some day it will burst.

One question of “religious sensitivity” is that of eating and drinking by non-Muslims in the month of Ramadan. It is now being bandied about that for non-Muslims to eat or drink when in the company or presence of Muslims is to hurt the sensitivities of the Muslims. This was never an issue in the good old days. Muslim scholars have said that Islam does not forbid non-Muslims eating in the presence or company of Muslims in the month of Ramadan. So who started this nonsense and why?

In my school days, school canteens used to sell both halal and non-halal food in stalls side-by-side. No Muslim children ever bought from the non-halal stall, but non-Muslims did buy food like nasi-lemak from the Muslim stall. Then they sat at the same table to eat. There was no question of hurting the sensitivities of anyone. The Indians did not say that by eating beef next to them the Malays children were being

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insensitive to their religious beliefs (it is pantang for Indians to eat beef). Similarly the Malay children did not complain that the Chinese students, by eating pork dishes next to them, were not being sensitive to Islam as pork is haram to the Muslims.

So how and why did the question of non-Muslims being insensitive to Muslims by eating in their presence or company become an issue?

Last week, I was at the BNM Penang branch for a discussion on a banking matter. Two officers attended to me, a Malay lady and a Chinese lady. As we sat down, the Malay lady put a plastic glass of mineral water before me and said “this is for you”. I felt so touched by this gesture and respect shown to me as a non-fasting person who would need to quench my dry throat. Did she, as someone who was fasting, do something wrong by giving me the water?

Yesterday I was at another meeting in KL at an office manned by a dozen staff. It ended at 2pm and a non-Malay staff and myself went for lunch nearby. The staff said she was so hungry as she had not taken any drink or snack the whole morning as she was afraid of doing so in the office (it has a coffee corner) during puasa month as it would be insensitive to the Muslim staff. I was taken aback to hear this. How the words and actions happening around us today have put the fear of offending Muslims if one were to eat in their presence.

Why should it be insensitive to my Muslim friends if I have to eat or drink in their presence? As a non-fasting person, my mealtimes are morning, afternoon and evening. When mealtimes come, I feel the pangs of hunger. A fasting Muslim, as told to me by fasting Muslim friends, does not feel the pangs of hunger during the daytime. This is because the body has received the normal amount of food, with the difference that meal-times are changed from daylight hours to night-time hours. Within two or three days of the start of fasting, the body adapts to the new schedule of mealtimes.

So could Muslim scholars please put this issue in its proper perspective. Do I have to hide myself from my Muslim friends when I am eating during fasting hours in the fasting month? Why should they feel I am being insensitive to them if I eat in their presence?

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Drunk on Muslim intoleranceMariam Mokhtar | October 10, 2014

Our future depends on moderate Muslims who dare speak out against intolerance and injustice.

Are you prepared to help the battered wife of an abusive husband, or will you shut your ears and eyes, when you hear her being physically and verbally abused? Will you wait till she is beaten to within an inch of her life before you help? Or will you be too late, because you deliberated for too long, and she was killed?

The state of Selangor is like a battered wife. She is punched, kicked, and verbally abused, but she still resumes her role as the dutiful wife. Her neighbours can hear her being beaten and flinch when they hear her cries of help. Her neighbours are reticent about helping. Her husband will tell them to mind their own business. They also assume that the wife will be ashamed of her predicament. Her own family members, living in the same household, appear helpless. They are afraid that the husband will attack them, instead.

The domestic violence scenario is an apt euphemism for Selangor. The state has barely recovered from the Menteri Besar saga, when another threatens to spoil the peace – this time, over beer.

It wasn’t too long ago, when the Allah controversy reared its ugly head, the cow-head incident threatened security, a woman who was about to exchange her marital vows was dragged away for questioning and a few undercover reporters destroyed the sanctity of Holy Communion in a Catholic church, in their attempt to expose the alleged conversion of Malays.

In Malaysia, religion is used to distract from real issues like rising poverty, the increase in crime, the low morals of many MPs and their equally destructive cousins, the Mat Rempits.

In the Selangor case, the battered wife’s neighbours, who consist of both Muslims and non-Muslims, are reluctant to say or do anything because they are afraid of her husband. The violent husband is the euphemism for the conservatives and the ulamas in society.

Many moderate Muslims are afraid to make their opinions known, because these religious bigots will criticise them. The non-Muslims are fearful, because they will be accused of interfering. Don’t allow the bigots to silence you!

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Except for a few courageous Muslim leaders, like PAS’ Shah Alam MP, Khalid Samad, our Muslim leaders have failed Malaysia. Malaysia is not an Islamic country, despite the wishes of the ulamas and conservative politicians, to turn it into a caliphate.

This country emerged from the collective toil and sacrifice of all its people, including the mistreated Orang Asli and the neglected people of East Malaysia. The success of our leaders is not measured by its determination to pander to the majority and the elite.

Today, Malaysia may feel like a broken society, torn apart by racial and religious intolerance, but only if you allow the bigoted politicians and ulamas to ride roughshod over you.

Khalid represents the voice of reason, but he has attracted the ire of the conservative rabble rousers in his party and elsewhere. Good men who look after the interests of all in their community, are a threat to bigots and hypocrites. Khalid’s enemies will vilify and attack him.

Malaysia’s success relies on elected people, like Khalid, representing all, including the minorities, but there is another important factor. Our future depends upon the moderate Muslims, who must speak out against intolerance and injustice, and drown out the extremist views of misguided ulamas and conservatives.

Khalid defended the Oktoberfest beer festival and said it should not be shut down, as it was not aimed at the Muslim community. The PAS Temerloh MP Nasrudin Hassan disagreed. He said that Malaysia was an “Islamic country” and that the beer festival represented a “public vice” and threatened “Muslims sensitivities”.

Nasrudin appears to be more concerned about protecting Muslim sensitivities, only. Conservatives like him give Islam a bad name. His definition of the religion has affected Islam’s narrative of being a religion of peace and tolerance.

Remember the cow-head incident, the destruction of temples, or the lengthy persecution of book shop manager Nik Raina Nik Abdul Aziz, whose employers sold the book by the feminist, Irshad Manji.

Nasrudin should investigate the ease with which Muslims can allege that companies sell porcine-laced butter, chocolates or sauces thus triggering major losses for the firms. Does he condone body snatching? Or kidnapping in child-conversion cases?

Malays who post photos on Facebook beside a skinned cow’s head are dismissed as just larking about. Alvin Tan of Alvivi fame, who did something equally stupid, faced endless persecution. Ibrahim Ali and KL’s Umno-Baru Youth who threatened to torch bibles and buildings, respectively, escaped scot free.

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If Nasrudin wants to protect Islam, he should do something about the neighbouring state of Kelantan, where the gang rape of two teenagers by thirty men, in broad daylight, over several hours, went seemingly unnoticed by the community.

Perhaps, he could investigate why several married housewives, on the East coast, were infected with the AIDs/HIV virus, by their husbands? Will he do a study on the high rate of incest and drug taking amongst Malays?

Does he think it is right that the moral police can intrude on people’s privacy, thus making people think that Islam is a hive of sexual perverts and voyeurs? Nasrudin is silent on the elephant in the room – corruption.

A few gallons of beer will give the drinker a sore head and a full bladder. On the other hand, religious indoctrination corrupts Malay reasoning, erodes their values, gives them a sanctimonious attitude, and makes life a misery for everyone. Malaysians, like the battered housewife, should strike back and defend themselves.

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Zahid Hamidi: Majority of non-Malays moderate, respect other races

KUALA LUMPUR: The majority of the non-Malay communities in Malaysia are

moderates who respect the sentiments and sensitivities of other races, Home Minister Datuk Seri

Dr Ahmad Zahid Hamidi said.

He said a newspaper report that quoted him as saying that non-Malays were getting

increasingly arrogant and insulting the bumiputras, the royalty and Islam had been taken out of

context.

He said he was referring to leaders and supporters of the DAP, in his speech, who lacked

respect for the feelings of the Malays. Zahid said this was evident in comments made by the

opposition party and their supporters, especially those posted on pro-opposition news portals and

the social media.

The Umno vice-president said the Barisan Nasional had non-Malay component parties

and certainly they were not racists in their approach and that decisions affecting the country were

discussed. The power sharing approach and consensus-making were the hallmark of Barisan's

success.

“But it cannot be denied that DAP supporters had taken a different approach with their

arrogant method of politicking,” he said when contacted.

An English daily had quoted him as saying that Malays were paying the price of being

kind to non-Malays and that the latter was getting increasingly arrogant.

He was reported as saying that the insults were made under the pretext of democracy, freedom of

speech and globalisation.

Zahid said he would not have endorsed those who made insulting remarks against the

non-Malay communities, citing police actions against these culprits.

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Evaluate religious sensitivity, cultural perspective before organising events: Academician22 OCTOBER 2014 @ 10:21 PM

KUALA LUMPUR: To love, respect and to have compassion towards all animals, including dogs and pigs which are considered ‘najis’ (unclean) in Islam, are part of Islamic moral values and approach to morality.But, is it fair to hold an event, in which the participants unnecessarily touch such an unclean animal, merely to foster love and compassion, as well as to eliminate fear towards the animal to the extent of going against the principles of Islam?This was the question posed by the International Islamic University Malaysia’s (IIUM) Institute of Islamic Thought and Civilisation (ISTAC) Dean Prof Datuk Dr Mahmood Zuhdi Abd Majid.He said any proposal to organise an event that would touch on some aspects of certain religions should be thoroughly scrutinised first, not only in terms of the sensitivities of the followers, but also in terms of cultural perspectives that could trigger confusion within the society.He said the society of any religion and race should be more sensitive as the organising of such an event would only bring about negative impacts, including disuniting the society itself.“The organising of the ‘I Want to Touch a Dog’ event, for example, had put the Muslim community and the Malays in a quandary.“Not only in terms of Islamic law, but, if we look at it from the cultural perspective, dogs and pigs are aliens and the most disliked animals to the Malays.“This culture has been set into their minds since they were young and the organising of an event like this is like ridiculing the culture which they hold on to for so long,” he told Bernama.The event, which was held at the Central Park in Bandar Utama last Sunday with the initial objective to provide an understanding of the Islamic principles concerning dogs, was widely criticised when Muslims were allowed to touch and play with dogs brought to the event by non-Muslims.“What is the relevance of the event if it only caused confusion and disharmony among Muslims? The organisers and those who approved the event should have been more careful. This is where Islamic scholars should play their roles,” he said.

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As such, Mahmood Zuhdi said Islamic scholars should reevaluate their roles to reach out to Muslims at the earliest stage possible to ensure that young Muslims would not be easily influenced by elements out to confuse them.“It is hoped that Islamic scholars are not merely firm at saying no according to edict and law, but must also try to reach out and provide necessary explanations,” he said.Meanwhile, Muafakat Sejahtera Masyarakat Malaysia (Muafakat) president Ismail Mina Ahmad said the event reflected a leaning towards a combination of liberalism and Wahabi ideology, which contravened the Sunnah Wal Jamaah practiced in Malaysia.“Such an event shouldn’t have been held, it’s like a provocation to disunite Muslims in Malaysia,” he said.He also expressed concern that if no action was taken, such an event that could divert the faith of Muslims, would continue to emerge with worse implications.“As such, I hope the authorities will immediately investigate and correct the mindsets of the organisers so that the organising of such events will not recur,” he added. - BERNAMA

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Malaysia - Language, Culture, Customs and EtiquetteLanguage in MalaysiaThe Malay language is an Austronesian language spoken not only by Malaysians but all Malay people who reside in the Malay Peninsula, southern Thailand, the Philippines, Singapore, central eastern Sumatra, the Riau islands, parts of the coast of Borneo, Cocos and Christmas Islands in Australia. It is also very similar to Indonesian, known locally as Bahasa Indonesia.In Malaysia, the language is officially known as Bahasa Malaysia, which translates as the "Malaysian language". The term, which was introduced by the National Language Act 1967, was predominant until the 1990s, when most academics and government officials reverted to "Bahasa Melayu," which is used in the Malay version of the Federal Constitution. 

Malay Culture and SocietyA Multi-Cultural Society

Malaysia is a multi-cultural society. The main ethnic groups are the native Malays as well as large populations of Chinese, and Indians. When visiting the country it is clear that the ethnicities retain their religions, customs and way of life. The most important festivals of each group are public holidays. Although growing up, children are educated in the same schools and will eventually work in the same offices, few marry outside their own ethnicity. Families tend to socialise within their own ethnic group – all part of retaining their individual traditions and lifestyles. Despite the ethnic differences there are commonalities culturally speaking. 

Group OrientationThe family is considered the centre of the social structure. As a result there is a great emphasis on unity, loyalty and respect for the elderly. The family is the place where the individual can be guaranteed both emotional and financial support. When one member of the family suffers a financial setback, the rest of the family will contribute what they can to help out. Families tend to be extended, although in the larger cities this will naturally differ. 

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The Concept of Face

Malays, Chinese and Indians all strive to maintain face and avoid shame both in public and private. Face is a personal concept that embraces qualities such as a good name, good character, and being held in esteem by one's peers. Face is considered a commodity that can be given, lost, taken away, or earned. On top of this face also extends to the family, school, company, and even the nation itself. The desire to maintain face makes Malaysians strive for harmonious relationships. Face can be lost by openly criticizing, insulting, or putting someone on the spot; doing something that brings shame to the group; challenging someone in authority, especially if this is done in public; showing anger at another person; refusing a request; not keeping a promise; or disagreeing with someone publicly. Conversely, face can be saved by remaining calm and courteous; discussing errors or transgressions in private; speaking about problems without blaming anyone; using non-verbal communication to say "no"; and allowing the other person to get out of the situation with their pride intact.

Etiquette and Customs in Malaysia

Meeting and GreetingGreetings in a social context will depend upon the ethnicity of the person you are meeting. In general, most Malays are aware of Western ways so the handshake is normal. There may be slight differences though and a few things to bear in mind include: • Malay women may not shake hands with men. Women can of course shake hands with women. Men may also not shake hands with women and may bow instead while placing their hand on their heart.• The Chinese handshake is light and may be rather prolonged. Men and women may shake hands, although the woman must extend her hand first. Many older Chinese lower their eyes during the greeting as a sign of respect. 

• Indians shake hands with members of the same sex. When being introduced to someone of the opposite sex, nodding the head and smiling is usually sufficient. Among all cultures, there is a general tendency to introduce: 

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• the most important person to the lower ranking person. • the older person to the younger person.• women to men. 

Names

The way names are used also varies between ethnicities: 

Chinese• The Chinese traditionally have 3 names. The surname (family name) is first and is followed by two personal names.• Many Chinese adopt more Western names and may ask you to use that instead. 

Malays• Many Malays do not have surnames. Instead, men add their father's name to their own name with the term "bin" (meaning ‘son of’). So Rosli bin Suleiman, would be Rosli the son of Suleiman. • Women use the term "binti", so Aysha bint Suleiman is Aysha the daughter of Suleiman. 

Indian• Many Indians do not use surnames. Instead, they place the initial of their father's name in front of their own name. The man's formal name is their name "s/o" (son of) and the father's name. • Women use "d/o" to refer to themselves as the daughter of their father. 

Gift Giving EtiquetteHere are some general gift giving etiquette guidelines: 

Gift giving to Malays:• If invited to someone's home for dinner, bring the hostess pastries or good quality chocolates.• Never give alcohol.• Do not give toy dogs or pigs to children.• Do not give anything made of pigskin.• Avoid white wrapping paper as it symbolizes death and mourning.• Avoid yellow wrapping paper, as it is the color of royalty.• If you give food, it must be “halal” (meaning permissible for Muslims).• Offer gifts

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with the right hand only or both hands if the item is large.• Gifts are generally not opened when received. 

Gift giving to Chinese:• If invited to someone's home, bring a small gift of fruit, sweets, or cakes, saying that it is for the children.• A gift is traditionally refused before it is accepted to demonstrate that the recipient is not greedy.• Do not give scissors, knives or other cutting utensils as they indicate a desire to sever the relationship.• Flowers do not make good gifts as they are given to the sick and are used at funerals.• Do not wrap gifts in mourning colours - white, blue, or black.• Wrap the gifts in happy colours - red, pink, or yellow.• Elaborate gift - wrapping is imperative.• Never wrap a gift for a baby or decorate the gift in any way with a stork, as birds are the harbinger of death.• It is best to give gifts in even numbers since odd numbers are unlucky.• Gifts are generally not opened when received. 

Gift giving to Indians:• If you give flowers, avoid frangipani as they are used in funeral wreaths.• Money should be given in odd numbers.• Offer gifts with the right hand only or both hands if the item is large.• Do not wrap gifts in white or black.• Wrap gifts in red, yellow or green paper or other bright colors as these bring good fortune.• Do not give leather products to a Hindu.• Do not give alcohol unless you are certain the recipient drinks.• Gifts are generally not opened when received.

Business Etiquette and Protocol in Malaysia

Meeting and GreetingWithin the business context most Malaysian businesspeople are culturally-savvy and internationally exposes. Your experience may very well depend upon the ethnicity, age, sex and status of the person you are meeting. The best approach is always friendly yet formal. A few tips include:  • Initial greetings should be formal and denote proper respect.• If in a team, introduce the most important person first.• Many Malays and Indians are uncomfortable shaking hands with a member of the opposite sex.• Foreign men

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should always wait for a Malaysian woman to extend her hand. Foreign women should also wait for a Malaysian man to extend his hand.• To demonstrate respect Chinese may look downwards rather than at the person they are meeting.• It is important that professional titles (professor, doctor, engineer) and honorific titles are used in business. Malays and Indians use titles with their first name while Chinese use titles with their surname. 

Business Card Etiquette• Business cards are exchanged after the initial introductions.• If you will be meeting Chinese, have one side of your card translated into Chinese, with the Chinese characters printed in gold.• If you will be meeting government officials, have one side of your card translated into Bahasa Malaysia.• Use two hands or the right hand only to exchange business cards.• Examine any business card you receive before putting it in your business card case.• The respect you show someone's business card is indicative of the respect you will show the individual in business. Act accordingly.• Never write on someone's card in their presence. 

CommunicationAs an extension to the need to maintain harmonious relations, Malaysians rely on non-verbal communication (i.e. facial expressions, tone of voice, body language, etc). Such a communication style tends to be subtle, indirect and. Malays may hint at a point rather than making a direct statement, since that might cause the other person to lose face. Rather than say "no", they might say, "I will try", or "I’ll see what I can do". This allows the person making the request and the person turning it down to save face and maintain harmony in their relationship. If you are unsure about the affirmative response you received, you may want to continue the discussion, re-phrasing the question in several different ways so that you may compare responses. If the response was given because the Malaysian did not know how to respond in the negative without causing offense, this may come out. Alternatively, they may have someone else give you the bad news. Silence is an important element of Malaysian communication. Pausing before responding to a question indicates that they have given the question appropriate thought and considered their response carefully. Many Malaysians do not understand the Western propensity to respond to a question hastily and can consider such behaviour thoughtless and rude. Malaysians may laugh at what may

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appear to outsiders as inappropriate moments. This device is used to conceal uneasiness. Do not show anger in public as it makes Malaysians uncomfortable and creates a feeling of powerlessness. There is a greater chance of achieving a good outcome id you are calm, whereas little is resolved by shouting. 

Business Meetings• It is a good idea for the most senior person on your team to enter first so that he or she is the first to greet the most senior Malaysian. • This gives face to both parties as it demonstrates respect towards the Malaysian and shows that you respect hierarchy within your company. • It is customary for leaders to sit opposite each other around the table. • Many companies will have their team seated in descending rank, although this is not always the case.• Expect the most senior Malaysian to give a brief welcoming speech. You need not reciprocate.• There will be a period of small talk, which will end when the most senior Malaysian is comfortable moving to the business discussion.• Meetings may be conducted or continue over lunch and dinner. • Meetings, especially initial ones, are generally somewhat formal. Treat all Malaysian participants with respect and be cautious not to lose your temper or appear irritated.• At the first meeting between two companies, Malaysians will generally not get into in-depth discussions. They prefer to use the first meeting as an opportunity to get to know the other side and build a rapport, which is essential in this consensus-driven culture.

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