Social Styles - Softed · PDF fileEXPRESSIVE lo ... upset by criticism or personal rejection zTheir main priority is the task in hand, and the results achieved ... other social styles

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Social StylesSocial Styles

Analyse patterns and characteristics

Determine the style of others

Assess your own style

Plan to accommodate others' needs

Treat others as they want to be treated

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Analyse patterns and characteristicsAnalyse patterns and characteristics

Individuals are all different, but …

Trigon Systems Consultants P/L (Aust) 1

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Four Social StylesFour Social Styles (Merrill & Reid)(Merrill & Reid)

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

lo RESPONSIVENESS hi

lo

A

SS

ER

TIV

EN

ES

S

h

i

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Personal styles at workPersonal styles at work

‘just do it!’wants to know what and whenlikes to take charge

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVETell

Ask

Tasks People

‘lets all do it!’wants to know who elselikes energy and optimism

‘do it right or not at all!’wants to know howlikes to plan

‘we’re great!’wants to know why and wholikes co-operation and loyalty


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DriverDriver (hi A, lo R)(hi A, lo R)

Is obsessed by a compulsion to perform

Has a passion for knowledge and is constantly searching to answerthe ”whys” of life

Works at a fast and decisive pace (idleness drives them crazy)Likes to be in charge, seek productivity, and dislike loss of control

Measures their personal worth by how much they do

Wants you in turn to get to the point, because they are irritated byinefficiency and indecision

Has the ability to deal with tough interactions without becomingupset by criticism or personal rejection

Their main priority is the task in hand, and the results achievedUnder pressure, they will assert themselves strongly and dictate the waythings are going to be

The Control SpecialistThe Control Specialist

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ExpressiveExpressive (hi A, hi R)(hi A, hi R)

Is friendly and easy-going

Works at a fast and spontaneous pace

Struggles with commitment and follow-through

Tries to create an atmosphere that encourages flexibility

Achieves acceptance through sociability and creating a stimulatingenvironment

wants to be admired and seeks recognition; dislikes being ignored

measures their personal worth by the amount of recognition andacknowledgement (or complaints) they receive

They like to try the new and different; to live for the here and nowThey have happy spirits and can endure hardships and trials easier thanother social styles

The Social SpecialistThe Social Specialist


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AmiableAmiable (lo A, hi R)(lo A, hi R)

Works well with others and promotes harmony

Prefers to maintain relationships and avoid confrontation

Is a good listener and is sensitive to others feelings

Is a strong and loyal team player

Prefers an atmosphere that encourages close relationships

Achieves acceptance through conformity and loyalty

Likes to have direction and want to be appreciated

Works at a slow and easy pace, which tends to lend an air ofrelaxation to others in the group

They seek deep meaning in relationships and experiencesCan sometimes create tension for others because of their personalinsistence on doing things in a slow-paced, warm and friendly,responsible but non-aggressive way

The Support SpecialistThe Support Specialist

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AnalyticalAnalytical (lo A, lo R)(lo A, lo R)

Is more formal and conservative

Has a strong sense of duty and obligation

Is steadfast, reliable, and dependable

Has a forceful work ethic, with a measured and systematic pace

Prefers an atmosphere that encourages careful preparation

Achieves recognition through being correct, logical and thorough

Is a natural giver

Often takes on too much responsibility and tend to be worriers

Does not like unpredictability and surprises

Their main priority is the job at hand and the process to achieve itUnder pressure, an Analytical will withdraw into their own world andavoid contact with the causes of their stress.

The Technique SpecialistThe Technique Specialist


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UnemotionalIndependent, self-sufficientStrong-willed and decisiveChange "junkie"Must correct wrongsExudes confidenceNot easily discouraged

Bossy, insensitiveQuick-temperedImpatient, can’t relaxEnjoys argumentationWon’t give up when losingUnsympatheticDislikes show of emotions

ST

RE

NG

TH

WE

AK

NE

SS

Goal-orientedSees the whole pictureOrganizes & plans aheadMotivates people to actionSeeks practical solutionsInsists on productionThrives on opposition

End justifies the meansCan over dominateDoesn’t analyze detailsMay make rush decisionsManipulates peopleIntolerant of mistakesCan be a workaholic

Has little need for friendsWill lead and organizeStimulates activityExcels in emergenciesWill work for group activityIs usually right

Uses people, dominatesMay be rude or tactlessDecides for othersPossessive, unforgivingToo independent, proudCan’t say “I’m sorry.”

EMOTIONS AT WORK AS A FRIEND

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Emotional, demonstrativeLives in the presentTalkative, storytellerGood sense of humorSincere heart, curiousHolds listeners physicallyAlways a child

ExaggeratesEgotisticalNaive and gullibleSeems phony to someWeak-willed, reactiveRestlessFearful

ST

RE

NG

TH

WE

AK

NE

SS

Volunteers for jobsStarts in flashy wayHas energy & enthusiasmThinks up new activitiesCreative and colorfulLooks great on the surfaceCharms others into work

Prefers talk, wastes timeUndisciplinedDecides by feelingsPriorities out of orderForgets obligationsEasily distractedConfidence fades fast

Makes friends easilyAppealing, life of the partyLikes spontaneous activityThrives on complimentsEnvied by othersApologizes quicklyDoesn't hold grudges

Undependable, reactiveHates to be aloneNeeds to be center stageDominates conversationsMakes excusesLooks for creditInterrupts; does not listen



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Low-key personalityQuiet, but wittyCalm, cool and collectedSympathetic and kindPatient and well-balancedEasygoing and relaxedHappily reconciled to life

Keeps emotions hidden Unenthusiastic, shy Indecisive Too compromising Self-righteous Fearful, worried Avoids responsibility

ST

RE

NG

TH

WE

AK

NE

SS

Competent and steadyHas administrative abilityAvoids conflictsFinds the easy wayPeaceful and agreeableMediates problemsGood under pressure

Not goal-orientedLacks self-motivationLazy and carelessPrefers to be a spectatorHard to get movingResents being pushedDiscourages others

Easy to get along withInoffensiveDry sense of humorHas many friendsPleasant and enjoyableGood listenerHas compassion, concern

Stays uninvolvedDampens enthusiasmResists changeIndifferent to plansJudges othersSarcastic and teasingStubborn, awkward


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Deep and thoughtfulSerious and purposefulIdealisticAppreciate of beautySensitivity to othersSelf-sacrificingConscientious

Remembers the negativesEnjoys being hurtToo introspectiveDepressed, even moodyLow self-imageRigidStuffy

ST

RE

NG

TH

WE

AK

NE

SS

Schedule/Detail-orientedOrderly and organizedWants things done rightLikes charts, figures, etcSets high standardsPersistent and thoroughFinishes what he starts

Not people orientedHard to please, rigidToo much time planningPrefers analysis to actionDepressed at imperfectionSelf-DeprecatingDeep need for approval

Makes friends cautiouslyAvoids seeking attentionWill listen to complaintsDeep concern for othersSelf-sacrificingFaithful, devoted, loyalSolves others' problems

Lives through othersHolds back affectionMoralistic, unforgivingIndecisiveCritical of othersAntagonistic and vengefulSelf-centered



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Other TheoriesOther Theories (approx correlation)(approx correlation)

Merrill & Reid

Hippocrates/Galen

Le Haye/Littauer

Jung

Myers-Briggs

Drucker

LIFO System (Atkins)

DISC

Lefton

Analytical

Melancholic

PerfectMelancholic

Thinker

Introvert/Thinker

Thought Man

Conserving-Holding

Compliance

Submissive-Hostile

Amiable

Phlegmatic

PeacefulPhlegmatic

Feeler

Introvert/Feeler

People Man

Supporting-Giving

Steadiness

Submissive-Warm

Driver

Choleric

PowerfulCholeric

Director

Extrovert/Thinker

Action Man

Controlling-Taking

Dominance

Dominant-Hostile

Expressive

Sanguine

PopularSanguine

Intuitor

Extrovert/Feeler

Front Man

Adapting-Dealing

Influencing

Dominant-Warm

* P Bender

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CaveatsCaveats

Style is an explanation, not an excuse

There is no such thing as

Good or Bad Style

Right or Wrong Style

Beware of

Generalities (simplistic stereotyping)

Snap Judgments – avoid them

Just remember:

75% of the world is not in your quarter!


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Determine the style of othersDetermine the style of others

Talking

What they talk about

How they talk

Tone of voice

Pace of speech

Body LanguageCommunication StyleResponsivenessListening Pattern

WorkingStyle

Area

Pace

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Talking: what they talk aboutTalking: what they talk about

I will…

I think…

I want…

I feel…

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE


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Talking: the way they talkTalking: the way they talk

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

States, commands

Direct assertion

Enquires

Indirect assertion

States, commands

Direct assertion

Enquires

Indirect assertion

TELL

ASK

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Talking: tone of speechTalking: tone of speech

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Louder

Uses voice to emphasise points

Quieter

Does not vary voice much

Louder

Uses Voice to emphasise points

Gets easily excited

Quieter

Does not vary voice much


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Talking: pace of speechTalking: pace of speech

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Very fast

Moderate Slower

Fast

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Body LanguageBody Language

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Leans forwardLimited or no facial expressionsIntense eye contactDeliberate movements

Leans backLimited or no facial expressionsLimited eye contactLimited gestures

Leans backSome facial expressionsGood eye contactRegular gestures

Leans forwardControlled facial expressionsGood eye contact – at others?Lots of gestures


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Communication StyleCommunication Style

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Direct, to the pointCan be outspokenFormal, business-like

Specific, conciseClear, logicalFormal, bottom-line

Animated, excitableCan come on too strongInformal, casual

Dreamy thoughtsMay seem vagueInformal, casual

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ResponsivenessResponsiveness

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

May appear pushyMore reserved & cautiousCan appear preoccupied

May appear unresponsiveReserved and cautiousCan appear preoccupied

Open and warmAnimated and enthusiasticEnjoys the conversation

FriendlyResponsiveEnjoys the conversation


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Listening PatternListening Pattern

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Can be a poor listenerWants to control conversationMay interruptLikes to summarize

Listens… but may appear asthough they’re not

Good listenerReacts to what you’re sayingCares

ListensReacts to what you’re sayingTalks a lot

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Work StyleWork Style

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Works in priority orderDoes several things at onceIntense, drivenGenerates ideas

Thorough, attentive to detailStep by step proceduresConcentrates on one thing at atime, pensive

Easy going, cooperativeAlways willing to be of serviceGoes with the flowNo strong sense of urgency

Unstructured, likes freedomLots of people interactionMakes lists of people to call &places to go


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Work AreaWork Area

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Functional, organizedWork is in priority order

References are at fingertipsLots of paperWork is in piles

Sentimental mementos andsouvenirsPictures of family and friendsDesk area may appear cluttered

Interesting things, gadgets,novelty itemsGive-aways readily displayed

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Work PaceWork Pace

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Works fast – a whirlwindLikes change

MethodicalSteady stream of workLikes a predictable routine

Slower / rarely in a hurryNeeds time to changeDislikes pressure

FasterBores easilyMoves from one thing to another


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Ascertain your own styleAscertain your own style

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How To Recognize Your Own StyleHow To Recognize Your Own Style

Self-assessmentCharacteristics

Motivations & attitudes; needs & wants

Self-image

Behaviour questionnaire

When all else fails:

ask your family and friends …. they know!


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CharacteristicsCharacteristics

Accurate

Analytical

Consistent

Detail-Oriented

Diligent

Logical

Meticulous

Orderly

Precise

Task-Oriented

Technical

Thorough

Accommodating

Agreeable

Appreciative

Cooperative

Diplomatic

Even-Tempered

Generous

Patient

Sentimental

Supportive

Trusting

Understanding

Animated

Charismatic

Dramatic

Enthusiastic

Lively

Motivating

Optimistic

Outgoing

Popular

Spontaneous

Stimulating

Talkative

Action-Oriented

Adventurous

Authoritative

Candid

Challenging

Competitive

Hard-Driving

Impressive

Powerful

Results-Oriented

Self-Reliant

Strong-Willed

AMIABLE ANALYTICALEXPRESSIVEDRIVER

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Primary Characteristic [Strength]

Motivated By

Attitude to Goals

Group Role

Needs to

Wants To Be Appreciated for

Likes to be Rewarded with

Go getterAmbitious

Results

Sets many goals

Leader

Be in control

ProductivityMaking an impact

Power


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Motivated By

Attitude to Goals

Group Role

Needs to



NetworkerSocialiser

Applause

Goals kill spontaneity

Rapport builder

Be centre of attention

ContributionGiving others opportunities

Recognition

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Motivated By

Attitude to Goals

Group Role

Needs to



PeacemakerBridge builder

Approval

Cautious about commitment

Interpersonal

Feel included

InvolvementBeing considerate of others

Approval


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Motivated By

Attitude to Goals

Group Role

Needs to



Fact finderPragmatist

Activity

Goals must be met on time

Information provider

Be given focus and direction

QualitySound judgement

Responsibility

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Self-imageSelf-image

* P Bender

Merrill & Reid

Other Expressions

True Colours

Bird Symbols

Animal Symbols

Shapes

Analytical

Processor

CognitiveLogistical

Compliance

Gold

Owl

Beaver

square

Amiable

Helper

Interpersonal Supporter

Submission

Blue

Dove

Cocker Spaniel

circle

Driver

Boss

Behavioural Commander

Dominance

Green

Eagle

Lion

triangle

Expressive

Impulsive

AffectiveSocializer

Inducement

Orange

Peacock

Otter

parallelogram


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Behaviour Behaviour Grid (Grid (LiteLite))

DRIVER

AMIABLEANALYTICAL

EXPRESSIVE

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 160

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

ASSERTIVENESS

RESPONSIVENESS

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Plan to accommodate others’ needsPlan to accommodate others’ needs

Murphy’s Law of Thermodynamics:Murphy’s Law of Thermodynamics:“things get worse under pressure”“things get worse under pressure”


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Discomfort Zone

Comfort Zone

PanicZone

• uncertainty• fear

WhatWhat do you fear in a change situation?do you fear in a change situation?

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DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Being taken advantage of

Loss of control

Fears Fears ……..

Being criticised

Quick decisions

Being bored

Rejection

Being alone

Loss of security


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DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Is energisedWill become assertiveSeeks control

Gets over-focused on detailMay withdraw

Worries, so try to avoid hassleKeeps head down, chats to matesSeeks chocolate!

Rises to the challenge at first,but may get stressedMay flip to the dark side!

Under StressUnder Stress

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Under Under ExtremeExtreme Stress Stress

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Will become autocratic

Will withdraw Will submit

Will become offensive orsarcastic


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BEHAVIOUR ZONESBEHAVIOUR ZONES

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

normal

under stress

underextremestress

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WORKING TOGETHERWORKING TOGETHER

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

broadcomfortzones

mutualoverlap


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WORKING - under stressWORKING - under stress

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

reducedcomfortzones

littlemutualoverlap

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WORKING - under extreme stressWORKING - under extreme stress

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

minimalcomfortzones

Disjoint(no overlap)


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CHAMELEON - all things to all peopleCHAMELEON - all things to all people

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

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Treat others as they want to be treatedTreat others as they want to be treated


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Wants …Wants …

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVE

Power

Perfection Peace

Popularity

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Causes of conflictCauses of conflict

DRIVER

ANALYTICAL AMIABLE

EXPRESSIVEPRIORITIES

PRIORITIES

PA

CE

PA

CE

PACE & PRIO

RITIESPACE & PRIORITIES


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When dealing with…

DO

Focus on the present

Be brief and efficient

Get to the bottom line

Speak in terms of short-termconcrete results

Give them options

Let them feel in control

Stress how the Driver will “win”with your proposition

DON’T

Focus on the long-term

Give too much detail

Be ambiguous

“Beat around the bush”

Get too personal

Get into a control contest

Back down, however, if youbelieve that you are right

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DO

Focus on the future

Illustrate concepts with stories

Seek their ideas, input

Focus on the big picture

Show personal interest andinvolvement

Stimulate their creative impulse

Compliment them

Stress how the Expressive willstand out from others

DON’T

Get straight down to business

Dwell on details

Be impatient with side-trips andcreativity

“Nit-pick”

Be cool and impersonal

Be too serious

Talk down to them

Put down their enthusiasm andexcitement


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DO

Focus on tradition

Be flexible

Be easy and informal

Be personal and personable

Allow time to “feel good”

Emphasise a team approach

Stress how the Amiable can be“safe”

DON’T

Push for too much detail

Press hard to change things

Hurry them

Push for immediate commitment

Be cool and impersonal

Confront them

Attack

Be dictatorial or autocratic

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DO

Focus on past, present andfuture

Talk facts

Focus on detail and accuracy

Be logical and well-organised

Tell them exactly what you willdo & when

Allow time to ponder

Stress how the Analytical canbe assured of being “right”

DON’T

Be vague, inconsistent orillogical

Be intolerant of details

Overlook the past

Rush things

Be too personal

Be overly casual

Appear to not be serious

Press for immediate action


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ADAPT - Interpersonal VersatilityADAPT - Interpersonal Versatility

Low Versatility

Concern for self

Reduces tension for self

Narrow interests

Rigidity

Unwilling to adapt

Resistant to feedback

High Versatility

Concern for others

Reduces tension for others

Broad interests

Flexibility

Adapts readily

Open to feedback

Versatility does not come easily - for most, it takes practiceVersatility does not come easily - for most, it takes practice

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ReferencesReferences

The 16 Personality Types, Descriptions for Self-Discoveryby Linda V. Berens & Dario Nardi

Personal Styles and Effective Performance: Make Your Style Work for Youby David W. Merrill & Roger H. Reid

I’m Not Crazy, I’m Just Not You: The Real Meaning of the 16 Personality Typesby Roger R. Pearman & Sarah C. Albritton

Please Understand Me: Character and Temperament Typesby Davis Keirsey & Marilyn Bates

What Color is Your Personality?: Red, Orange, Yellow, Green…by Carol Ritberger

The Delicate Art of Dancing with Porcupines: Learning To Appreciate the FinerPoints of Othersby Bob Phillips


Documents

Social Styles - Softed · PDF fileEXPRESSIVE lo ... upset by criticism or personal rejection zTheir main priority is the task in hand, and the results achieved ... other social styles