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NewsletterRoy Maas Youth Alternatives

SPRING 2017

Page 2 facebook.com/youthalternatives

www.rmya.org

BillWilliam F. Wilkinson, III Chief Executive Officer

Yours gratefully,

Dissociation is the common response of children to repetitive, overwhelming trauma and holds the untenable knowledge out of awareness. The losses and the emotions engendered by the assaults on soul and body cannot, however, be held indefinitely. In the absence of effective restorative experiences, the reactions to trauma will find expression. As the child gets older, he will turn the rage in upon himself or act it out on others, else it all will turn into madness. —Judith Spencer, author

When children and youth arrive at RMYA, their trauma has already “found expression.” Our staff experience our residents’ trauma in things both small and great. Complaints about available breakfast cereal, bathing, brushing teeth, or doing chores are common and seem “normal” for those of us who have raised children of our own. Yet for some of our residents, these activities can trigger something deeper that can amp up individual anxiety levels and can spread throughout a program. Even something as innocuous as playing a particular type of music can remind a child of some distant memory they didn’t know was there, but is the source of great pain. For many of our children, school produces significant stress and can be a source of frustration that disrupts classrooms and stymies the learning of other students who may be ready to be involved in a teacher’s lessons that day. Larger expressions of trauma are communicated through risky behaviors such as fighting, running away, damaging possessions or property, attempts at self-harm, or becoming verbally or physically aggressive with staff.

When we do our work well, these behaviors may actually get worse before they get better. And while clinicians welcome these fissures that allow them to probe and bring these children to a place where they can begin to heal, the effect of these behaviors on our direct-care staff takes its toll. Because of the number of children involved, the variety of past and current trauma and behavior triggers, and the assortment of each child’s self-described calming techniques, our staff can get pulled in many directions at the same time and our focus of being “in relationship” with each child is strained. Supervision becomes more complicated when youth become physical with staff or each other, or run away from the program. Additionally, our residents can be placed on upgraded or continuous supervision to ensure they are not a danger to themselves or others and requires even more exacting staff vigilance.

I would urge you to watch the movie Short Term 12; which can be found on Netflix. It will give you some insight into the work we do, and how physically and emotionally exhausting it is to take care of the children in our care with love and patience; firmness and purpose. And next time you see one of our staff taking care of that group of kids who just introduced themselves to you and shook your hand, take a moment to thank them for having the perseverance and stamina to help heal a child.

REALITYTHE

OF

CARING FOR ABUSED CHILDREN

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LOTS OF GOOD THINGS HAPPEN IN APRIL: EASTER, FIESTA...BUT APRIL IS ALSO

The horror of child abuse touches everyone in some way, whether it’s higher taxes to pay for prisons, rehabilitation for offenders who were abused as children, or from more personal experience.

According to the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services, in Fiscal Year 2016 there were 66,721 confirmed victims of abuse or neglect in Texas; 4,550 of these victims lived in Bexar County. In FY 2016, there were 222 deaths due to child abuse and neglect related causes in Texas; 11 of those children were from Bexar County. While child fatalities decreased drastically from FY 2015 to FY 2016, there were still 21 confirmed deaths due to child abuse and neglect in Texas.

Most of us don’t see it every day, but for those who are victims of abuse, and those dealing with the fall-out, the prevention of child abuse is a beautiful dream – one RMYA is working hard to make come true.

RMYA provides residential and counseling services to children who were abused (physically, sexually and/or emotionally), neglected, abandoned and exposed to domestic violence. They have seen and experienced horrific things, some you wouldn’t dream of in your worst nightmares. Unfortunately this nightmare is real and their dreams of a happy childhood seem to be over. But, with your help, RMYA can restore hope. We teach children how to heal from their trauma and we help them realize that what happened to them does not define who they are. It doesn’t mean they can’t have a happy life from now on.

RMYA also works to prevent child abuse by helping families struggling with parenting and relationship issues. We want to give all children a foundation of positive values to promote individual successes and healthy relationships. We create brighter futures in a safe, healing environment by giving children and families the tools to end the cycle of abuse for the next generation.

To accomplish this vital task, RMYA relies on our local and extended community to help us fight child abuse. We couldn’t do our job without the support of businesses, foundations, churches and individuals like you. Through our volunteers and financial donors, we are making a difference (over 80,000 children and families served by RMYA since 1976).

We dream of a day when child abuse is just a bad dream. Please make our dream a reality. Join us in our fight to prevent child abuse.

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Our children get to enjoy a fun-spirited and joyous occasion with all our staff and volunteers. Different businesses, small and big, as well as local faith-based groups and families all share in the season of giving to make it a memorable holiday. We are very thankful that we have such loving and generous supporters. Most of our children come from abusive and neglectful situations, and they remember the Christmas holiday as a time of stress and struggle. Some may have never had a home to celebrate the holidays, and some may have felt forgotten by their own family when they would hear about others receiving gifts and they received nothing. When a group of supporters comes together to share an occasion such as Christmas, they create better memories for our children, improving their self-esteem and outlook on life. Our children feel hopeful and loved.

Our Christmas events begin happening the first week of December, and follow through until Christmas day. Most of the special events are held on our campus; others are held off campus, with volunteers providing entertainment, dinner and desserts as well as gift-giving. We fill our children’s Santa bags with gifts from drives and angel trees that local businesses, neighborhoods, churches and troops all assist with. The gatherings are what our children remember the most, knowing that someone cared enough to spend time with them and that they were thought of as special to someone. At one event, a girl expressed tears of joy when she received her own journal and bookmark. At another event, a boy said that he never received his own Bible before. Staff who have worked at the agency for several years see residents return with their own families, to visit what they once considered their home, and say that the holidays were their favorite time while they lived at RMYA. We could never have created such beautiful memories without the community’s care and commitment to our children. Thank you!

Christmas at RMYA is a very special time of the year.

Jennifer Ann FariasDirector of Volunteer Services

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Here at RMYA, Christmas is one of the busiest times of year due to everyone’s focus on the same goal: wanting our kids to have a positive Christmas where they feel safe and loved. For most of our kids, this has been something they have never been able to experience throughout their lives.

What I hear from most of our kids during the Christmas season when they attend events is, “Ms., this is the best Christmas I have ever had!” We would not be able to accomplish this without the help of our wonderful community, donors and

volunteers. Thank you so much for allowing us the opportunities to make Christmas for our kids a success, and enable them to have a positive and fun experience they will cherish for a lifetime.

This year our Christmas consisted of many holiday events including a Christmas party with dinner and dancing at Laura Ingalls Wilder Intermediate School; Boerne Rotary Breakfast with Santa at Kendall Elementary; Valero Holiday party at Valero Headquarters, which included a DJ, games and arts and crafts; and a wonderful breakfast at the Tower of the Americas Restaurant in San Antonio, including Santa and his elves bringing gifts to each of our kids and young adults at RMYA.

Ending the Christmas season, all kids at RMYA attended the Valero Alamo Bowl Football game thanks to Valero Alamo Bowl. The celebration of the holiday season went on into New Year’s Eve day thanks to Dr. Rountree, who had an event for our kids including lunch at Cici’s pizza before going to a movie theater to watch a movie just for our RMYA kids!

Thank you all for helping to make sure we are able to provide a wonderful holiday experience for the children we love to serve at RMYA. We could not do anything without the wonderful support and ideas from all of you: THANK YOU!

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Construction on our new Bridge Emergency Shelter is well underway! We expect completion in late spring, with our kiddos moving in over the summer.

Stay tuned for updates on ribbon cutting and grand opening!

What does being optimistic mean to me? Well I would say having a wonderful outlook on life. I would call myself optimistic. I had a lot of things that were horrifying in my life, but I’m still here living life as happy as can be. I think to myself, “don’t worry about the small stuff, it won’t matter in 10 years anyway.” I also think about my future and how my outlook on life will affect my future. So let’s say you have a glass of water but it’s only half full, but some people see it as half empty. I see it as half full, but that’s just who I am. Now, I’m not always optimistic. I don’t like school. That’s the one thing I have to work on. Sometimes I think I will fail but my teacher says I can do it. I’m trying, so that’s what counts. If you just try to be optimistic, your life is so much better, and your future will be brighter. Trust me, I know. Life for me has been hard but having this great outlook on life has helped me so much. All you gotta do is try.

What does optimism mean to me? Optimism means to have confidence about the future or the successful outcome of something. My best friend is optimistic about everything. She would always catch me in negative moods. I do listen to her and often take it to the heart because it will help me in life. Sometimes what people say matters to me. It can affect my moods in a certain way. There is a staff here, her name is Ms. Adriana. She is very optimistic to me because she always sees the bright side of my situations even when I can’t. She always tells me to forget the mistakes of the past and move on to the future. Every time I’m upset, I always want to punch something or hit someone but she is always right there for me. Ms. Adriana always asks me, “Is that healthy, or are you going to have an injury?” I would always think about what she says ‘cause it can improve my way of thinking about my life. In conclusion, I think having an optimistic person by your side is great. Always look forward in your life.

Recently, the Optimist Club of San Antonio visited our Bridge Emergency Shelter for their annual Optimist Luncheon. The residents were invited to write a brief description of what being optimistic means to them. Sharing optimism and a positive outlook on life is a big part of the healing that happens in RMYA programs, and we thought we’d share with you what a couple of the kids had to say:

— Anna

— Taylor

POSITIVITY

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The concept of diversity encompasses acceptance and respect. It means understanding that each individual is unique, and recognizing our individual differences.  These can be along the dimensions of race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, socio-economic status, age, physical abilities, religious beliefs, political beliefs, or other ideologies.  It is the exploration of these differences in a safe, positive, and nurturing environment. It is about understanding each other and moving beyond simple tolerance to embracing and celebrating the rich dimensions of diversity contained within each individual.

What is Diversity to Roy Maas Youth Alternatives?We celebrate the commonalities and differences inherent in embracing a global family that includes people from all walks of life, acting and speaking respectfully in all our interactions, and listening carefully to what each person has to offer.

We offer the children in our care sanctuary from cruelty, abuse, and neglect, and acknowledge that safety, security, and non-violence are foundational to rebuilding the shattered trust of these injured souls. We seek out the interconnectedness that bonds us together as a team, and endeavor to actively discover ways to achieve our mutual goals. Through all we do, we look for opportunities to learn from everyone we encounter and affect human relations with the children in our care, with each other, and the broader community.

DEFINITION OF

Please shop at, donate to, or volunteer in our 12,000 square foot resale space! We have new treasures and special deals daily.

All proceeds benefit the children in our care.

RMYA THRIFT SHOP

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ASIA CIARAVINOFenwick Club

Roy Maas Youth Alternatives receives money from the Department of Family and Protective Services to take care of the children in our programs. As a child’s behavior improves, the money we receive goes down. Sadly, this is the time when we need to double our efforts and provide even more services to our kids. We also receive federal funding from the grants we apply for, including the Federal Basic Center Grant which provides additional support for the Bridge Emergency Shelter and our TurningPoint Transitional Living Program for young adults aging out of foster care. In total, 70% of our budget is covered by state contracts and federal grants. In order to provide the critical therapeutic, residential care our kids need in order to heal, RMYA raises the rest of the budget from foundations and individual donors, about $2.5 million a year. This is why we have fundraising events and it may feel like we are constantly asking you, the RMYA extended family, for donations.

Recently, the staff at the Maas cabin at Meadowland called and asked if we had any funding for hammocks. It’s a simple thing the girls had asked for. They want to use them for time outs and a place to read and relax. We added it to the Maas cabin wish list, a list we keep on file for every one of the programs including Girlsville, Maas, Log, Poston, Wright, and Junction at Meadowland in Boerne and The Bridge, TurningPoint, and the Counseling Center in San Antonio. These lists contain everything from hair products, towels, sheets, pillows, shoes, televisions, video games, clothing, kitchen essentials, board games, books, and art supplies. The RMYA Thrift Shop and the food services department also maintain wish lists for whenever there is extra money or a donor who is interested in purchasing something for that program. Last August, we budgeted for each of our kids to receive $100 to go back to school shopping. The total cost for clothing in August of 2016 was $7,600. WOW!

In addition to buying essentials, your donations provide maintenance for 30 buildings, 23 of which our children live or go to school in and have plumbing, heat, and air conditioning systems that require constant maintenance and repairs. RMYA owns and maintains a fleet of 25 vehicles that we use to transport our kids to events, doctors’ appointments, and visits with family, caseworkers, attorneys, and potential foster and adoptive families. During fiscal year 2016, we spent $20,000 on gasoline. In the past few years, generous donors like you provided funding to replace the flooring in four of our Boerne cabins, replace the roof, flooring, and furniture at the Pool house, the air conditioning systems at two cabins and repair and resurface the pool at Meadowland. With foundation support we were able to purchase two gently used large passenger vehicles, build a detention basin, purchase a new home for the TurningPoint program, and build a new emergency shelter in San Antonio. Maintenance and repairs is one of our biggest expenses at RMYA and none of those expenses are covered by state and federal contracts.

RMYA has invested in other essential infrastructure in the past several years including improving our aging and outdated technology. Many of the computers in Boerne and San Antonio simply couldn’t be repaired anymore and had to be replaced. In order to keep our data safe, we have invested in new servers, anti-virus software, and a system to link data between the two campuses. In the past year, we have invested in the staff at RMYA by making professional development a priority and

raising salaries whenever possible. As is the case with companies across the country, the cost of providing healthcare benefits for our employees and their families continues to rise, increasing our costs significantly. We have some wonderful staff and they deserve to feel valued and supported in every way possible, if we want to keep great people at RMYA.

In order to be fiscally responsible we are always searching for ways to lower the cost of caring for our kids. We have wonderful volunteers to provide essential services like haircuts for residents. Your donations of toys, games, clothing, shoes, bicycles, skateboards, safety equipment, and art supplies also keep our costs lower. But your monetary donations are incredibly important to the health of the organization and we could not do this important work without them.

Why yourdonations matter.

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Memorials

Honoraria

Do you struggle to find the perfect gift for that special someone who has everything? Consider a tax deductible Honorarium or Memorial as a way to honor someone living or deceased. We will notify the individual or family

of the gift in their loved one’s name, and acknowledge your donation in our newsletter.

FLORENCE WILKINSONCarolyn & Jim Alley

FLORENCE WILKINSONCharlotte & Larry Travis

FLORENCE WILKINSONGeorganne & Robert Freund

FLORENCE WILKINSONBecky Martinez

FLORENCE WILKINSONRon & Jan Oord Graves

FLORENCE WILKINSONKen & Christie Kahlich

FLORENCE WILKINSONJanet Martinez & Diana Gonzales

FLORENCE WILKINSONThe Stroup Family

FLORENCE WILKINSONJohn & Susan Roach

FLORENCE WILKINSONThe Bradshaw Family

FLORENCE WILKINSONNickey McCasland

FLORENCE WILKINSONThe RMYA Family

ROY MAASWilliam & Marilyn Stavinoha

ERIK PIEKOSGeorganne & Robert Freund

OLIVIA & JOHNNIE GARCIAPatricia Mota

LURA & BILL WURZBACHGeorganne & Robert Freund

JERRY & WALKER WINSLOWIva Winslow

JAY BELLGina Garrison

TRUDY EDWARDSMike & Beth McMahon

DONNA J. SHRADERJames Howser

CHAP “CONNIE” WALKER, 173RD AIRBORNE BRIGADEFrank Martinez

LEONARD DAVISBob A. Roberts Family

HORACE G. JACKSONLinda G. Jackson

ERNESTO RODRIGUEZCathy & Frank Burzik

DON, JACK, & JANICE JORDANSharlene Jordan

SUE WHITWORTHEdward Coffey

WILLAM A. & SALLY PARKERPaul & Jean Parker

ELIZABETH KLAS BURTCHELLRichard & Sandra Glomski

CHARLOTTE TRAVISSeverin Travis

LANA DUKEBecki Brinkerhoff

CATHERINE HOHMANNGuy Hohmann

SUSAN & MIKE SLOANTom Williams

TIFFANY PURGASONAnne Purgason

ASIA CIARAVINOWomen’s Transportation Seminar

ASIA CIARAVINOFenwick Club

ALL KIDS WHO NEED LOVEKaren & Kris Korff

KIM ELORRIAGADee & Rick Carduner

THE MCCLELLAND FAMILYDee & Rick Carduner

POPE AND DON CROOKDee & Rick Carduner

THE WHELESS FAMILYDee & Rick Carduner

COLLETTE & BARRY BROONER, CALEB & ELIZABETHDee & Rick Carduner

SHARI & RANDY PULMANDee & Rick Carduner

MARY & GORDON WEINERDee & Rick Carduner

ALICIA TORRES & FRANK LEGACKIDee & Rick Carduner

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FIESTA AT MEADOWLANDPlease join us on April 27 for our second annual “Fiesta at Meadowland”, supporting the children who make their home at the Meadowland campus in Boerne. Enjoy a tour of the campus, a catered dinner, and stories from former residents to help raise money and awareness of the needs of the foster children at Meadowland. You can host a table and invite your friends or join us as an individual; all are welcome to this free friend- and fundraiser.

THE BIG GIVEThe Big Give SA is coming up on May 4! Support the children of RMYA on this 24-hour day of giving by donating online or signing up to be one of our peer-to-peer fundraising champions. Share our donation page on your social media or forward to friends via email; your donations and advocacy during this citywide initiative will help us raise crucial funds and awareness for the kids in our care.

VOLUNTEER APPRECIATION PARTYJoin us in celebrating the dedicated volunteers who donate their time, gifts, and love to the children of RMYA. Our appreciation party on May 20 will feature lunch and a special presentation by our residents. Our volunteers are at the heart of the healing our kids experience at RMYA; we couldn’t do the work of restoring hope, one child at a time without you! Stay tuned for more details on this exciting event.

For more information on any of our upcoming events, please call 210-340-8077 ext. 7000 or email rmya@rmya.org.

3103 West AvenueSan Antonio, Texas 78213-4535(210) 340-8077

RETURN SERVICE REQUESTED

NewsletterRoy Maas Youth Alternatives

BACK TO BASICSWe need your help with some basic necessities.

Keeping up with household needs can get a little hectic when you have over 120 kids to care for. Can you help us provide much-needed toiletries and hygiene supplies,

laundry soap, and snacks for our children?

Providing these essentials is a crucial part of helping our kiddos heal and restoring hope to their lives. Bring your in-kind donations to Meadowland or the Bridge, or make a donation using the enclosed

envelope, or visit our fundraising page at www.rmya.org to give what you can.