su RETIREE NEWS · 2020-01-31 · IBM Retired Employees’ Club – London Branch Retiree News th– 30 January 2020 Page 2 of 13 FEEDBACK FROM RECENT CLUB EVENTS ATP Champions Tennis

IBM Retired Employees’ Club – London Branch www.retireelondonclub.org

Retiree News – 30th January 2020 Page 1 of 13 www.retireelondonclub.org

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RETIREE NEWS

30th January 2020

BOOK NOW

We have five events that you can book tickets/places for:

Tutankhamun Exhibition at the Saatchi Gallery on Wednesday 4th March 2020

Greatmoor “Energy from Waste” on Wednesday 18h March 2020

Highgate Cemetery on Wednesday 29th April 2020

Biggin Hill Memorial Museum and Downe House on Wednesday 6th May 2020

Golf Day at the Lambourne Golf Club on Thursday 18th June 2020

WHAT’S INSIDE THIS RETIREE NEWS?

Have you heard about the IBM 360 Model 20 Rescue and Restoration project: If not, please read our article about this on the following page.

We have an extensive range of events for you to enjoy throughout this year: Please check out our 2020 Events Plan on page 8.

FROM YOUR CHAIRMAN

As we enter a new year and a new decade, the world seems to be in turmoil both environmentally and politically. Even IBM seems to be tightening its controls once again to make life more challenging for us! It’s certainly a rather depressing outlook but rest assured that your committee will continue to try to provide you with opportunities during the coming year to cast the doom and gloom aside and enjoy some happier and more optimistic times. Without doubt, we are generally a happy and friendly group of people and I hope we will be able to cheer each other up! We have fond memories of those who have sadly left us this past year but we have new members joining us too, so please make them welcome!

Close to 200 members and guests attended our Christmas Lunch in December and were clearly not disappointed as we received many words of thanks and congratulations to all those involved in the organisation along with many requests that we return there again.

I want to take this opportunity to thank all our committee members for their huge commitment in the past year – many hours given voluntarily to organise and run our events programme - and I’m delighted that all have agreed to continue for yet another year. I would also like to thank each of you who have supported our events during the past year because your support and encouragement make it all worthwhile. I hope that many of you will attend our AGM in London on Monday 17th February to hear more about last year, our plans for the coming year and the challenges we face; and that you will continue to support us. Our guest Solicitor, David Roper, will also have interesting and valuable information for us to consider, bearing in mind that some of us, sadly, may not be celebrating the start of the next decade!

In this edition of Retiree News, you can book a visit to the Tutankhamun Exhibition at the Saatchi Gallery, organised by Chris Nickless; a visit to “Greatmoor - “Energy from Waste”, organised by Pauline Schurer; Highgate Cemetery, organised by Ros Patrick; Biggin Hill Memorial Museum and Downe House, organised by Derrick Daines; and our Golf Day, organised by me! We hope to see you at many of them.

Best Wishes for a Very Happy, Healthy and Successful New Year!

David Sparrow

http://www.retireelondonclub.org/


https://www.retireelondonclub.org/event/annual-general-meeting-2019/



FEEDBACK FROM RECENT CLUB EVENTS

ATP Champions Tennis at the Royal Albert Hall: Friday 29th November

“No John McEnroe this time, but lots of good 'retired' tennis stars, which included ladies this year. In 3 teams - Team Tim, Team Goran and Team Greg. We went on the Friday afternoon and saw some great tennis, some great players and were thoroughly entertained over 4 matches. It's so nice to see serious tennis played with laughter, humour and fun which is enjoyed by both players and spectators.” Howard Barlow “Thank you for organising the tennis tickets. The seats were great, and it was an excellent afternoon of top quality tennis. We thoroughly enjoyed it.” Stephanie and Frank Savage

Christmas Lunch at the Victoria Plaza Hotel: Monday 9th December

“Thank you and the whole team who organised the Dinner for Retirees at the Victoria Plaza Hotel. It was a splendid occasion and a chance to renew friendships with ex-colleagues. The food and decor was first rate as usual and the staff at the Victoria Plaza did a grand job in providing excellent service.” Richard Sugden

“A short note from Ann and me to say a big 'thank you' for today's extravaganza. All aspects cried 'quality' and we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. Please pass on our thanks and congratulations to everyone involved in the organisation and presentation.” Dave Smith

“Thank you to those who were organising the Christmas Lunch. Azhar and I really enjoyed it. Really well organised and a lovely lunch. I look forward to attending some other events as this was my first.” Genie Rafiq

“We thoroughly enjoyed ourselves at the Christmas Lunch. The meal was delicious from the lovely hot plates, excellent food and the Malbec wine. Yes, the hotel did us proud. Please pass on our thanks to the hotel staff (who we thanked as we went along). Also please extend our thanks to the committee, it was much appreciated.” Margaret Tilley

Christmas Classics Concert at the Royal Festival Hall: Sunday 15th December

Christmas celebrations really began with this concert of classical Christmas music and carols, played by the Philharmonia Orchestra and sang by the Bach Choir, which delighted the audience who were only too happy to join in with the singing of traditional carols.

‘& Juliet … her Musical’ at the Shaftesbury Theatre: Thursday 16th January

What would Juliet have done if she had lived? We found she headed off to Paris to contribute to this feminist pop musical extravaganza reflecting contemporary gender values. Will (Shakespeare) was there to guide us with his quill pen; it was a lot of fun. Many great songs, with lyrics by Max Martin, were energetically performed by a vibrant cast. “Another excellent show for us to really enjoy. Certainly different, great script, amazing voices and dancing too. We loved it.” Sue and Keith Andrews

IBM 360 RESCUE & RESTORATION PROJECT

Have you heard about the project which is being run near Aylesbury where an IBM 360 Model 20 (with peripherals) is being restored to its former self. The team in charge of this project are looking for volunteers who could help with the many tasks that will be required to complete the project. One of our Retiree Club members, Trevor Judd, is helping to restore the 73I/O console and would appreciate any help that our members can give him in finding parts for this (which would be the same parts as those for a Selectric Golfball typewriter). If you are an ex-Customer Engineer, maybe this project might appeal to you? For more information, visit the team’s web site at https://ibms360.co.uk/. If you have experience of antique mainframes and would like to help in any way, you can contact the team at [email protected]



https://ibms360.co.uk/

mailto:[email protected]



THINK BEFORE YOU ACT!

Arcelor-Mittal Steel, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning against a wall. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business. He asked the guy, "How much money do you make a week?" A little surprised, the young man looked at him and said, "I make $400 a week. Why?" The CEO said, "Wait right here." He walked back to his office, came back in two minutes, and handed the guy $1,600 in cash and said, "Here's four weeks' pay. Now GET OUT and don't come back." Feeling pretty good about himself the CEO looked around the room and asked, "Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-ball did here?" From across the room a voice said, "Pizza delivery guy from Domino's."

NEW EVENTS

Details of the new events are shown on the following pages.

Please note that a Booking Form for each event can be found at the end of Retiree News. These can also be downloaded and printed from our website and must be received by the sponsor before your application can be considered.

Tutankhamun Exhibition - Wednesday 4th March 2020 at 12.00 noon

Saatchi Gallery, King’s Road, London SW3 4RY

Nearest underground station – Sloane Square on the Circle & District lines

Discover the glittering treasures of Tutankhamun before they return to Egypt for ever! Come and discover the most famous of the Pharaohs and the young sovereign’s personal belongings as you follow his passage into everlasting life.

The legend of Tutankhamun captured imaginations globally when his tomb was unearthed by British explorer Howard Carter and financier Lord Carnarvon in 1922. This exhibition, TUTANKHAMUN: Treasures of the Golden Pharaoh has been produced by the Egyptian Ministry of Antiquities and unveils more than 150 original objects from the tomb, 60 of which have travelled out of Egypt for the first and final time before they return for permanent display within the Grand Egyptian Museum (which is currently under construction). It should though be noted that the famous ‘Death Mask’ is not in this exhibition. For further details, please check the web site - www.tutankhamun-london.com

NOTE: The tickets purchased for this exhibition are for seniors (age 55+) only, therefore your guest must be aged 55 or older.

Transport Options: Sloane Square is a 3-4 minute walk from the Saatchi Gallery and Victoria is a 10-12 minute walk. The following buses will also take you there - 11,19,22,49,211,319 (King's Road) and 11,137,211 (Lower Sloane Street).

Disabled Access: Assisted or ramp access is available at the Gallery's main entrance. All floors have lifts and there is level access between the galleries on each floor. Wheelchairs are available upon request. There are two blue badge disabled parking bays to the rear of the Gallery which can be accessed via Turk's Row off Lower Sloane Street. Booking well in advance is essential - to reserve a disabled parking bay or a wheelchair please telephone 0207 811 3077.

Your committee contacts for this event are Harvey Schonfeld and Chris Nickless

Cost: £16 per person (retiree and guest £32) Full price is £24 per person

Please remember to enclose a stamped addressed envelope for your tickets

Cut off: Saturday 22nd February 2020 or when all tickets are sold



http://www.pocruises.com/britannia



Greatmoor “Energy from Waste” - Wednesday 18h March 2020 at 10.30 am

Greatmoor, Greatmoor Road, Woodham, Aylesbury, Bucks HP19 0AP

This event offers a very different and unusual experience – a visit to one of the most sophisticated waste disposal facilities in the UK! It will give us a fascinating insight into how waste becomes energy and we will witness the actual operation, enabling us to recognise the importance to the local environment of the work undertaken at this site. Our visit will begin in the Visitors Centre, where we will be served with coffee/tea whilst the Education Centre Manager provides a 30 minute introduction, including an explanation about how the facility operates. We will then begin the tour, lasting approximately 90 minutes, starting in the Control Room where we will view the waste bunker and grab crane, plus the grate, turbine and condenser fans. The tour continues along narrow walkways often consisting of metal grating (including some at height) with occasional short flights of stairs.

When our tour has finished, we will leave the site and drive the short distance to the Akeman Inn for lunch (included in the price). Our tables are booked for 1pm and they will be available until 4pm so we can enjoy a leisurely lunch. When completing the application form please indicate your menu choices for the main and dessert courses. IMPORTANT NOTE: As this event is a visit to an industrial site, due to health & safety reasons, there are several conditions in place. Before submitting your application form, please check the following important restrictions. All visitors must be able to complete the tour as the group cannot be split once the tour has started. In the unlikely event of a fire, visitors must be able to descend up to six flights of stairs. Also, the generator in the turbine hall creates powerful magnetic fields that may affect medical devices such as pacemakers. We will be required to wear steel toe capped boots, a hard hat, a hi-viz singlet, safety glasses and gloves, all provided on site. Although these restrictions seem onerous, Greatmoor have advised us that the safety of their visitors is a primary consideration as the tour takes place in a working industrial facility.

There are a limited number of places for this visit, therefore If you have any questions or wish to check availability, please contact Pauline Schurer on 01494 871993 or email [email protected] Your committee contact for this event is Pauline Schurer

Cost: £18 per person (retiree and guest £36)

For confirmation of your booking and to receive further information about this event, please enclose a stamped addressed envelope

Cut off: WHEN ALL PLACES ARE TAKEN

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Highgate Cemetery - Wednesday 29th April 2020 at 11.15 am

Highgate Cemetery, Swain’s Lane, London N6 6PJ

Nearest underground station – Archway station on the Northern line (although it can take up to 30 minutes to walk to the cemetery, there are two buses which take you fairly close to the entrance)

Visiting a cemetery is not the normal type of event that your retiree club organises, but Highgate Cemetery is one of England’s greatest treasures with some of the finest funerary architecture in the country. It is a place of peace and contemplation where a romantic profusion of trees, memorials and wildlife flourish. Opened in 1839 as part of a plan known as the “Magnificent Seven”, it went into decline in the 1970s before being rescued by a charity, the Friends of Highgate Cemetery Trust. The cemetery has two separate wings, the West Wing and the East Wing. Access to the West Cemetery is only possible if you are part of an organised tour, therefore our visit will begin with a 90-minute tour commencing at 11.15 am.





Nowhere captures better than the West Wing the special atmosphere of this Victorian cemetery. During our guided tour, you will see iconic graves and the first ever plot in the cemetery. It is home to the most impressive architectural features – the Chapel, Colonnade, Egyptian Avenue, Circle of Lebanon, Terrace Catacombs and the mausoleum of Julius Beer. Following the guided tour, you are free to explore the East Wing on your own (which is on the other side of Swain’s Lane), where the graves of many well-known figures reside, such as world-famous philosopher and sociologist, Karl Marx. When Karl Marx was buried here, the cemetery was a private, profit-making commercial operation. However, as it filled up it became uneconomic as a private concern and was rescued in 1981 by the Friends of Highgate Cemetery. Burials have continued here since the Friends took over and the cemetery continues to serve the needs of North London. Our visit will gain you access to the hidden corners of this beautiful, historic site and with over 53,000 graves, it is a place to remember the people who have gone before us and to celebrate their achievements.

When our guided tour finishes you may wish to take lunch in a local restaurant and then return in the afternoon to visit the East Cemetery (which is open until 5.00 pm). NOTE: If you have limited mobility, you should contact Ros Patrick before booking your places on this visit. In the West cemetery the paths are steep and the tour route includes two flights of stairs. The East cemetery is on a gentler slope with no steps and predominantly tarmac paths and is more easily wheelchair accessible. Limited disabled parking is available outside the cemetery’s entrance.

Your committee contact for this event is Ros Patrick

Cost: £8.50 per person (retiree and guest £17)

Confirmation of your booking and further information about this event (including maps and directions) will be sent via email.

If you prefer to receive this by post, please enclose a stamped addressed envelope.


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Biggin Hill Memorial Museum and Downe House - Wednesday 6th May 2020

Biggin Hill Memorial Museum, Main Road, Biggin Hill, Kent TN16 3EJ

Downe House, Luxted Road, Downe, Kent BR6 7JT

During the Second World War, Biggin Hill became the most important airfield of the Battle of Britain because of its high altitude and strategically important location between London and continental Europe. It is one of Britain’s oldest aerodromes and is still internationally recognised as Sir Winston Churchill’s ‘strongest link’. The museum tells the story of Britain’s most famous fighter station through the personal experiences of those who served there, and the community that supported them. It includes uniforms, medals, personal letters, documents and even furniture from the local pub. It includes objects related to remembrance and memorial and the founding of the two chapels at the airfield from 1943-1951. The museum is open from 10am and in addition to the museum itself you can explore the main chapel and gardens where you can learn more about the airfield’s history. There is also a café where you can take some refreshment on your arrival. Each visitor is given a discovery tablet, designed to enrich your experience through additional storytelling and special films and photographs. Located on the airport perimeter is the Biggin Hill Heritage Hanger where you can see flying Spitfires and Hurricanes on display. Entrance to this hanger is not included in the ticket price – for further details and prices, visit https://bigginhillheritagehangar.co.uk/

This event is a two centre visit and following our tour of the memorial museum we will drive the 3 miles to Downe House. This English Heritage property was the home of Charles Darwin, the author of “On the Origin of the Species”. It was originally built in the early 18th century and was then extensively modernised. It had various owners and in 1842 Charles Darwin bought the house and moved his young family there. In 1929, the house became a museum dedicated to the life of Darwin.



https://bigginhillheritagehangar.co.uk/



The inside of the house has been recreated exactly as it was when the Darwin family lived there and during your visit you will see Darwin’s old study where he carried out his revolutionary scientific work and which contains almost every original piece of furniture and dozens of Darwin’s possessions. You will also see Charles and Emma’s bedroom where he enjoyed reading and where he kept a watchful eye on his experiments in the garden from the room's large bay window. The gardens were Darwin's 'outdoor laboratory' and he spent many hours here making observations and conducting his experiments. After you have visited the house, take a wander in the gardens, visit the Sandwalk (Darwin’s ‘thinking path’), and his greenhouse. During your visit you may wish to visit the café for a tasty lunch and afternoon treat. NOTE: If you and/or your guest are members of English Heritage, please bring your membership cards with you. Your committee contact for this event is Derrick Daines

There are two prices for this event:

£5 per person (retiree and guest £10) for members of English Heritage

£13 per person (retiree and guest £26) if you are NOT members of English Heritage

Booking options available for this event:-

Use Online Booking (to make your booking) and send a cheque in the post

Send a paper booking form in the post and pay online using Online Payment

Use Online Booking (to make your booking) and pay online using Online Payment

Send a paper booking form and cheque in the post

Derrick’s address is at the top of the booking form (on page 12).

If you want to use Online Payment, Derrick will send you an email with instructions (after he has received your online booking or printed booking form).

If you want to use Online Booking, to display and complete the booking form, click HERE

Confirmation of your booking and further information about this event will be sent via email. If you prefer to receive this by post, please enclose a stamped addressed envelope.


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Golf Day - Thursday 18th June 2020

The Lambourne Golf Club, Dropmore Road, Burnham, Bucks SL1 8NF

For our 11th Retiree Golf Day, we are returning to The Lambourne Golf Club (a short drive from junction 2 of the M40). We are limited to 32 players, so to prevent disappointment, send in your completed booking form early (no entry fee- no play!). Each London Retiree Club Member is allowed one playing partner/guest at the subsidised price, which is £45.00 per person. Members of other IBM Clubs (not playing as a member’s guest) are entitled to play at the subsidised rate but any guest they bring must pay the full price of £70.00.

The competition for the Cyril Thomas Memorial Trophy (current holder, Bill Hunter) is open to men and ladies and will be played over 18-holes. It will be followed by a meal and prize-giving. Apart from the winner’s trophy, there will be other prizes to be won, so do come along and enjoy the day. The competition will be played in 4-balls and there will be individual and team prizes. We hope that you will enjoy some friendly rivalry against your playing team members and against the rest of the field. We will do our best to see that you play with your preferred partner or guest, although this cannot be guaranteed. We also hope to see more ladies competing this year.



https://www.retireelondonclub.org/event/biggin-hill-memorial-museum-and-downe-house#booking



We will start with coffee/tea and bacon roll, served from 11:30 by which time you must have registered your attendance with the organiser. First tee time will be 12:30, with groups starting simultaneously from the 1st and 10th tees. It is expected that you will have completed your round in a maximum of 4.5 hours. We hope to sit down for our meal by 18:15 and to have completed that and the prize-giving by 19:30. Dress will be smart casual but this does not include your golf gear!

We are receiving a further cut in our grant this year and catering prices have risen but we have been fortunate that Peter Barford, one of our members is also a member at The Lambourne Golf Club and has negotiated an excellent deal for us so we are able to offer the day at only £3.00 more than last year.

Details of this lovely course can be seen at http://www.lambourneclub.co.uk/ together with the course layout, dress code, etc. There is plenty of parking available for visitors with good changing facilities.

PLEASE NOTE: It is your responsibility to organise golf insurance. The IBM Retired Employees’ Club; London Branch, will not insure you for this event.

Your committee contact for this event is David Sparrow

Cost: £45.00 per person (Retiree and guest £90)

Booking options available for this event:-

Use Online Booking (to make your booking) and send a cheque in the post

Send a paper booking form in the post and pay online using Online Payment

Use Online Booking (to make your booking) and pay online using Online Payment

Send a paper booking form and cheque in the post

David’s address is at the top of the booking form (on page 13).

If you want to use Online Payment, David will send you an email with instructions (after he has received your online booking or printed booking form).

If you want to use Online Booking, to display and complete the booking form, click HERE

We will use your email address for confirmation of your booking and to receive further information about this event. If you do not have one, please enclose a stamped addressed

envelope with your application form and cheque.

Cut off: Thursday 4th June 2020 or when all places are taken

JUST FOR RETIREE’S

His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.

My photographs don't do me justice - they look just like me.

Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle: Keep Away From Children.

The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down . . . is so you can't see him laughing.

You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.

I don’t mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really excited.

When someone asks what I did over the weekend I squint and ask “Why, what have you heard?”

I hate it when a couple argues in public and I missed the beginning and don’t know whose side I’m on.



http://www.lambourneclub.co.uk/

https://www.retireelondonclub.org/event/golf-day-2020#booking



EVENTS PLANNED FOR 2020

Event Date

Event

Mailshot Date

Thursday 16th January Theatre – “& Juliet, her Musical” 28th November 2019

Tuesday 28th January Tate Britain - “British Art Through the Ages” 28th November 2019

Tuesday 4th February Backstage & Architecture Tours at the National Theatre 28th November 2019

Tuesday 4th February Concert – Holst “The Planets” at the Royal Festival Hall 28th November 2019

Monday 17th February Annual General Meeting at the Royal Philatelic Society 28th November 2019

Thursday 27th February Theatre – “The Prince of Egypt” 28th November 2019

Wednesday 4th March Tutankhamun Exhibition at the Saatchi Gallery 30th January 2020

Monday 9th March to Friday 13th March

Short Break – Warners at Holme Lacy 23rd May 2019

Wednesday 18th March Greatmoor - “Energy from Waste” 30th January 2020

Wednesday 22nd April Combermere Barracks in Windsor 26th March 2020

Wednesday 29th April Highgate Cemetery 30th January 2020

Wednesday 6th May Biggin Hill Memorial Museum and Downe House 30th January 2020

Tuesday 12th May Treasure Hunt Walk in Richmond 26th March 2020

Wednesday 3rd June Frogmore Paper Mill in Apsley 26th March 2020

Tuesday 9th June Barnards Farm Gardens in Essex 26th March 2020

Thursday 18th June Golf Day at the Lambourne Golf Club 30th January 2020

Thursday 2nd July T20 Vitality Blast Cricket at Lords 26th March 2020

Wednesday 8th July Thames Barrier and Thames Cruise 28th May 2020

Tuesday 21st July and Wednesday 26th August

London Walk - Monasteries, Martyrs, Meat and Medicine 28th May 2020

July/August Summer Lunch 28th May 2020

Thursday 6th August Clarence House Tour 28th May 2020

Thursday 13th August “Carousel” at Regents Park Open Air Theatre 28th May 2020

Tuesday 8th September Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park and River Lea Boat Trip 23rd July 2020

September Spa Valley Steam Railway and Tunbridge Wells 23rd July 2020

Thursday 1st October to Thursday 8th October

Short Break to Montenegro 25th July 2019

Tuesday 13th October ITV Studio Tour 23rd July 2020

Monday 2nd November Magic Circle – History & Mystery 24th September 2020

November London Transport Depot Museum 24th September 2020

November Champions Tennis at the Royal Albert Hall 24th September 2020

December Christmas Concert 24th September 2020

December Christmas Lunch 24th September 2020

Please note: The above events are subject to change





YOUR COMMITTEE MEMBERS

If you want to contact any committee member, their details are below.

PLEASE NOTE: COMMITTEE MEMBERS WILL ACCEPT TELEPHONE CALLS BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 9.30 AND 19.00 MONDAY TO FRIDAY ONLY

David Sparrow

Chairman [email protected]

62 Eton Avenue, East Barnet, Herts. EN4 8TY

020-8440-5871 07711-627788

Harvey Schonfeld

Treasurer [email protected] 4 Rosslea, Windlesham, GU20 6PS 01276-453205

Pauline Schurer

Secretary [email protected]

23 Ellwood Rise, Chalfont St Giles, Bucks, HP8 4SU

01494-871993

Keith Andrews

Minutes Secretary [email protected]

33 Green Lane, Sunbury-on-Thames, Middlesex, TW16 7NX

01932- 765100

Peter Morley

Database Coordinator [email protected]

46 Ellesmere Place, Walton-on-Thames, Surrey, KT12 5AE

01932-241207

Ros Patrick

Theatre/Shows Ticket Distribution

[email protected] 25 Waxwell Lane, Pinner, HA5 3EJ 020-8429-1408

Tony Shortman

Retiree News Editor [email protected]

15A The Avenue, Chinnor, Oxon, OX39 4PA

01844-350014

Joan Russell

Retiree News Production Team

[email protected] Flat 1, 111 St Margarets Road, Twickenham, TW1 2LH

020-8892-8806

Simon Russell

Retiree News Production Team

[email protected] Flat 1, 111 St Margarets Road, Twickenham, TW1 2LH

020-8892-8806

Chris Nickless

Event Organiser [email protected]

7 Wyburns Avenue, Rayleigh, Essex, SS6 7QX

01268-771793

Sue Andrews


33 Green Lane, Sunbury-on-Thames, Middlesex, TW16 7NX

01932- 765100

Nigel Bartlett

Website Administration [email protected] 190 Church Road, London, W7 3BP 07516-291298

Derrick Daines


6 Sorrel Bank, Linton Glade, Forestdale, Croydon, CR0 9LU

07758-491359

THE JOY OF NEW TECHNOLOGY

I just watched a 3 year old pull up apps on a smartphone. I have just learnt to turn mine off without taking the battery out.

“Dad, we have Netbook, MP3 Players, Pendrive, iPad.... what did you have at school in your days?” “Our head!”

Tech kid: “So this is an Apple tree O.K, but where are the trees for Samsung, Lenova and HP....?”

Apparently you can’t use ‘beefstew’ as a password. It’s not stroganoff.

ON A COLD AND FROSTY MORNING

“On one particularly freezing cold morning, I defrosted my car windows using warm water and a scraper taking time and care to include rear and side windows. I heated the key with a match as the lock was frozen too. Then I noticed a package on the front seat which didn’t belong to me. Neither did the car - my car was the one behind covered in ice and snow.”

Wife texts husband on a cold winter morning: Windows frozen, won’t open. Husband texts back: Pour some lukewarm water over it and then gently tap with the edge of a hammer. Wife texts back ten minutes later: Computer really messed up now.

Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero outside they closed your school? No, me neither.













PAUSE FOR THOUGHT

I thought the dryer made my clothes shrink. Turns out it was the refrigerator.

My stomach is FLAT. The L is silent.

I’m not lazy I really enjoy doing nothing.

I speak my mind because it hurts to bite my tongue all the time.

At the bank I told the cashier, “I would like to open a joint account please”. “Ok, with whom?” “Whoever has lots of money”.

A police recruit was asked “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?” The reply, “Call for backup”.

NOTICES ON A CAFÉ WINDOW

NO SENIOR CITIZEN DISCOUNTS – you have had twice as long to get the money.

TODAY’S SPECIAL: Buy 1 Fish and Chips for the price of 2 – receive a second Fish and Chips

absolutely free!

TODAY’S OFFER: Buy any two drinks and pay for both of them.

NO WE DO NOT HAVE WiFi – talk to each other!

ANNIVERSARIES, WEDDINGS and FINAL RESTINGS

We are sorry to report the passing to final rest of our colleagues:

Peter Jackson who died on Saturday 5th October 2019

Eamonn Geaney who died on Wednesday 20th November 2019

NEXT RETIREE NEWS

This will be published on 26th March 2020 and will include details of:

Combermere Barracks in Windsor on Wednesday 22nd April 2020

Treasure Hunt Walk in Richmond on Tuesday 12th May 2020

Frogmore Paper Mill in Apsley on Wednesday 3rd June 2020

Barnards Farm Gardens in Essex on Tuesday 9th June 2020

T20 Vitality Blast Cricket at Lords on Thursday 2nd July 2020

Booking Forms for Events

Please remember that booking forms can also be printed from our website www.retireelondonclub.org

Cheques should be made payable to IBM Retired Employees’ Club (London) or you can abbreviate to IBM Ret Emp Club

When you include a stamped addressed envelope, please ensure it is large enough to accommodate tickets plus any further information. The S.A.E. size

we usually require is approximately 9”x 4½” (or 220mm x 110mm).






Please return to: Chris Nickless, 7 Wyburns Avenue, Rayleigh, Essex SS6 7QX

Tutankhamun Exhibition

Saatchi Gallery, King’s Road, London SW3 4RY

Wednesday 4th March 2020 at 12.00 noon

@ £16 per person (retiree and guest £32)

Name (please print): Personnel Number:

E-Mail Address: Phone Number:

Number of Tickets: Amount £ Cheque Number:

Cut off: WHEN ALL TICKETS ARE SOLD

Please remember to sign your cheque and enclose a stamped addressed envelope for your tickets

Please return to: Pauline Schurer, 23 Ellwood Rise, Chalfont St Giles, Bucks. HP8 4SU

Greatmoor “Energy from Waste”

Greatmoor, Greatmoor Road, Woodham, Aylesbury, Bucks HP19 0AP

Wednesday 18h March 2020 at 10.30 am

£18 per person (retiree and guest £36)



Number of Places: Amount £ Cheque Number:

Please circle your choice for lunch (and your guest’s), one per course:-

Main Pork belly roasted in cider, mashed potato, You: YES apple puree, broccoli, carrots, crackling & gravy Guest: YES

OR Half a boneless chicken, picante marinade, basil and garlic marinated tomatoes, You: YES dressed rocket & house fries Guest: YES

Dessert Apple Crumble & Vanilla You: YES Ice Cream Guest: YES

OR Belgian Chocolate and Raspberry Torte with Salted You: YES Caramel Ice Cream Guest: YES

Should you have any special dietary requirements, please contact Pauline directly on 01494 871993 or [email protected]


For confirmation of your booking and to receive further information about this event, please enclose a stamped addressed envelope






Please return to:

Mrs Ros Patrick, 25 Waxwell Lane, Pinner, Middlesex, HA5 3EJ

Highgate Cemetery

Highgate Cemetery, Swain’s Lane, London N6 6PJ

Wednesday 29th April 2020 at 11.15 am

@ £8.50 per person (retiree and guest £17)



Number of Places: Amount £ Cheque Number:


Confirmation of your booking and further information about this event (including maps and directions) will be sent via email.

If you prefer to receive this by post, please enclose a stamped addressed envelope.

Please return to:

Derrick Daines, 6 Sorrel Bank, Linton Glade, Forestdale, Croydon, CR0 9LU

Biggin Hill Memorial Museum and Downe House

Biggin Hill Memorial Museum, Main Road, Biggin Hill, Kent TN16 3EJ

Downe House, Luxted Road, Downe, Kent BR6 7JT

Wednesday 6th May 2020

There are two prices for this event:

@ £5 per person (retiree and guest £10) for members of English Heritage

@ £13 per person (retiree and guest £26) if you are NOT members of English Heritage


E-Mail Address:

Number of Places: Amount £ Phone Number:

Please indicate your payment method:-

If paying by cheque, please enter the cheque number:

If paying online, please enter the letters BACS:


Confirmation of your booking and further information about this event will be sent via email. If you prefer to receive this by post, please enclose a stamped addressed envelope.

Please separate booking slips and send a separate cheque for each event





Please return to: David Sparrow, 62 Eton Avenue, East Barnet, Hertfordshire, EN4 8TY

GOLF DAY

The Lambourne Golf Club, Dropmore Road, Burnham, Bucks SL1 8NF

Thursday 18th June 2020

@ £45 per person (retiree and guest £90)

Name Personnel Number

Golf Club (if any) Handicap

(if any)

My playing partner/guest is:

Name Personnel No. (if applicable)

Golf Club (if any) Handicap

(if any)

BUGGY HIRE: Buggies are available for hire, but they need to be reserved in advance. Please indicate if you would like one reserved (first come, first served). YES / NO You will have to pay the pro shop direct on the day for your hire.

MEAL: The menu selection for the meal will be advised nearer the time. However, please state below if you would prefer a vegetarian option, which is also available if requested in advance, or if you have any special dietary requirements.

The price is £45 per person (retiree and guest £90)

Please indicate your payment method:-

If paying by cheque, please enter the cheque number:

If paying online, please enter the letters BACS:

Cheques should be payable to “IBM Retired Employees’ Club (London)” or you can abbreviate to “IBM Ret Emp Club”

My email address is:

My phone number is:

Cut off: Thursday 4th June 2020 or when all places are filled

We will use your email address for confirmation of your booking and to receive further information about this event. If you do not have an email address, please enclose a stamped

addressed envelope with your application form and cheque.



Documents

su RETIREE NEWS · 2020-01-31 · IBM Retired Employees’ Club – London Branch Retiree News th– 30 January 2020 Page 2 of 13 FEEDBACK FROM RECENT CLUB EVENTS ATP Champions Tennis