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8/6/2019 Success habits workshop_Redesigned -FDP
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Success Habits workshop
S G Raja Sekharan
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Let us start with some introspection
Can you describe briefly your dream job In 5 years what do you aspire to be
In 10 years what do you aspire to be
In 15 years - what do you aspire to become
What current salary would make you feel good
Beyond dream salary and dream job, whatelse do you want (in the next 1-2 years)
What do you want out of life in the long run
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How will the success habits help you
Get control of your life Make smarter decisions
Improve your relationships with your friends
Get along better in society
Define your values what matters more toyou
Get more done in less time
Find balance between work, family, friendsand everything else
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The Seven habitshe Seven habits 1. Be proactive Take responsibility for your life2. Begin with the end in mind Define your mission
and goals in life
3. Put first things first prioritize, and do the mostimportant things in life
4. Think Win Win have an everyone can winattitude
5. Seek first to understand and then to beunderstood Listen to people sincerely
6. Synergise Work together to achieve more
7. Sharpen the Saw Renew yourself regularly
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Be ProactiveBegin with the end in mind
Put first things first
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Be ProactiveBegin with the end in mind
Put first things first
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Have you heard statements such as My career has taken a beating because of various
reasons beyond my control
I feel that I have done as well as others but Idont see my case being taken up by my boss well
enough I am open I am giving the option to my HOD to
make the necessary changes to my role
If I had her / his looks, Id be popular too
There is nothing I can do I have to do it because ..
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Proactivity Defined:
Stimulus Response
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Proactivity defined: I am the force, I am the captain of my life. I
choose my attitude. I am responsible for my ownhappiness or unhappiness. I am in the driversseat of my destiny I am not just a passenger.
Proactive people make choice based on values they think before they act they are calm, cooland in control. Reactive people make choice
based on impulse.
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Our language will tell us whether we areProactive or Reactive
Reactive language Proactive language
I will try
There is nothing I
can do I have to
You ruined my day
I will do it
Lets look at options
I choose to I am not going to let
your bad mood ruboff on me
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Reactive vs Proactive people
Reactive people Blame others Whine and complain Wait for things to
happen to them Are easily offended Get angry and say
things they regretlater
Proactive people Take responsibility for their choices Are not easily offended Think before they act Bounce back when something bad
happens Always find a way to make things
happen Focus on things they can do
something about, and dont worryabout things they cant
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Circle of Concern
Circle of Influence
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Circle of Concern
Circle of Influence
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Its your life, take charge
Take charge of yourlife; Don't wait foranybody: Take theinitiative always.
Every situation,presents variouslimitations forperformance
Understand what can beinfluenced by you (circleof influence)
Dont worry about whatyou cant influence (circle
of concern)
Focus your energies on things you can
control rather than worrying about
things over which you have no control.
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So much has been given to me. Ihave no time to ponder that which
has been deniedHelen Keller
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On the road of life, there are passengersand there are drivers .
drivers wanted
Volkswagen commercial
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Proactivity means telling ourselvesthat:
We are responsible for our own lives.
Our behavior is a function of our decisions not
our conditions.
We have the initiative and the responsibility tomake things happen first I take responsibilityand then I have a Can Do attitude.
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They cannot take away our selfrespect, if we do not give it to them
Mahatma Gandhi
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No one can hurt you without yourconsent
Eleanor Roosevelt
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Here is a good example I found :
Whether I fail or succeed shall be no mansdoing but my own.I am the force.I can clear any obstacle before me or I can
be lost in the maze.My choice, my responsibility; win or loose,only I hold the key to my destiny
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What can I do today to start this Habit:
We arent completely proactive or completely reactive we are somewhere inbetween. The key is to get into habit of being proactive more than before.
Some of the things that we can do:
Do something today that you always wanted to do but never dared.
If you get into a fight /misunderstanding, be the fist to apologize.
Listen carefully to how many times you use reactive word like I cant___ , They make me____ , I have to ____ .
Identify something that is in your circle of no control an stop worryingabout it
Ask yourself what is my most unhealthy habit and do somethingabout it.
Stick a Post It note I am not going to let _____ decide how I feel. andrefer to it often.
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Be ProactiveBegin with the end in mind
Put first things first
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Lets just go through this
scenario
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Relationship Character/ contribution / achievements
Father/
Spouse /
Friend
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Your mission statement
What you have justwritten is what youwant to be what ismost important toyou
You have a purpose inlife. You know in yourheart what's mostimportant to you. Infact, your missionand values areexpressed every day,by how you live - youjust may not realizeit
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Begin with the end in mind
Begin with the end in mind means developing aclear picture of where you want to go withyour life. It means deciding what your valuesare and setting goals.
Habit 1 (Be proactive) says - Be the driver not the passenger
Habit 2 (Begin with the end in mind) says -
Since you are the driver, decide where youwant to go and draw a map to get there
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Personal mission statement:
A *personal mission statement* is a briefdescription of what you want to focus on, what you want to
accomplish and who you want to become in a particular area of
your life over the coming years.
It is a way to focus your energy, actions,behaviors and decisions towards the thingsthat are most important to you
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Examples of a mission statementsI aspire to gain the respect and admiration of others by
being open, honest, fair and reliable. I will treat allpeople with the respect I want and will expect little,but will give a lot. I will keep to my word and will finishwhat I have started.
To educate, motivate and enable myself and all those
who know me to achieve self actualization and becomeeverything that God destined us to be.
I WILL be a better daughter, sister, student,teammate, and friend by improving on my qualitieslike organization, responsibility, and compassion.
I WILL become a respected and noted leader to thosewho surround me through taking charge andsucceeding in difficult situations."
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Begin with the end in mind
It means to start with a clear understanding of your destination
and a clear understanding of where you are now so that the steps
that you take are always in the right direction
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Begin with the end in mind
It means to begin today with the image, picture of yourend of life as your frame of reference by whicheverything else is examined.
Each part of your life todays behavior, tomorrows
behavior, next weeks behavior, next monthsbehavior can be examined in the context of thewhole, of what really matters to you most.
We may be very busy, very efficient -but we will betruly effective only if we begin with the end in mind
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All things are created twicefirst is mental creation and then comes the
physical creation
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There is always a first creation and asecond creation
Before we go on a trip, we plan it first in the mind
Before we build a house, we plan it first on paper
All athletes are visualizers they see it, feel it, visualize itbefore they actually do it
To the extent we understand this concept of two creations
and take responsibility for both
we increase our circle of control
If we dont take responsibility of the first creationSomeone else will do it for us and
we will be in reactive mode
B i ith th d i i d N t
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Begin with the end in mind Nextsteps Once you have a mission in place go for the GOALS
it is more specific, more measureable and it breaksthe mission into achievable steps with timedeadlines
Count the cost of not achieving the goals what will
happen if you do not achieve the goals Put the goal to paper write it
Just do it - Dont say Ill try; Say I will. When youtruly commit to achieving something, circumstances
come together to help you achieve it Share your goals with people close to you take their
help and advice.
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What can I do today to start this Habit
Fine tune the mission statement today to makein closer to what is truly important to you
Review your mission statement daily for 30days let it guide you in all your decisions
Determine three most important skills that youwill need to get what you aspire for make aplan to improve on those skills and implement it
Start writing a personal diary where you can
honestly appraise the events of the day andhow you felt about it
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Be ProactiveBegin with the end in mind
Put first things first
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The three habits defined:
Habit 1 (Be proactive) says - Be the driver not the passenger
Habit 2 (Begin with the end in mind) says -Since you are the driver, decide where you
want to go and draw a map to get thereHabit 3 ( Put first things first) says Get there
Dont let road blocks knock you off course
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Lets start with a question to self
What are the top 4 activities that currentlytake up most of your time
What are the top 4 activities you would like tospend most of your time
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Time Management Matrix
Urgent tasks Tasks that require immediate attention.
These are usually visible tasks they press on us these tasks insist on action they are often easytasks, fun to do.
Important tasks Tasks that require more initiative, more proactivity. These tasks contribute to your mission, your high
priority goals.
Ti M t M t i
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Time Management MatrixUrgent Not urgent
Important
Notimporta
nt
Quadrant I Quadrant II
Quadrant III Quadrant IV
Ti M t M t i
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Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Friend gets injured
Late for work
Project due today
Vehicle breaks down
Quadrant II
Quadrant III Quadrant IV
THE PROCRASTINATOR
Time Management Matrix
Time Management Matrix
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Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Friend gets injured
Late for work
Project due today
Vehicle breaks down
Quadrant II
Unimportant phone calls
Others small problems Peer pressure
Interruptions
Quadrant IV
THE PROCRASTINATOR
THE YES MAN
Time Management Matrix
Time Management Matrix
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Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Friend gets injured
Late for work
Project due today
Vehicle breaks down
Quadrant II
Unimportant phone calls
Others small problems
Peer pressure
Interruptions
Too much TV
Endless phone callsWork politics
Other time wasters
THE PROCRASTINATOR
THE YES MAN THE SLACKER
Time Management Matrix
Time Management Matrix
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Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Friend gets injured
Late for work
Project due today
Vehicle breaks down
Paper due in a week
Exercise
Relaxation
Planning, Goal setting
Unimportant phone calls
Others small problems
Peer pressure
Interruptions
Too much TV
Endless phone calls
Work politics
Other time wasters
THE PROCRASTINATOR
THE YES MAN THE SLACKER
THE PRIORITIZER
Time Management Matrix
Time Management Matrix Quadrant I personality
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g Q p y
Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimporta
nt
Quadrant II
Quadrant III
Quadrant IV
Stress and anxiety
Burnout
Mediocre performance
THE PROCRASTINATOR
Time Management Matrix Quadrant III Personality
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g Q y
Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Quadrant I Quadrant II
Quadrant IV
THE YES MAN
Reputation of being a pleaserLack of discipline
Feeling victimized - like a doormat for
others to wipe their feet on
Shallow, broken relationships
Time Management Matrix Quadrant IV Personality
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Time Management Matrix Quadrant IV Personality
Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Quadrant I Quadrant II
Quadrant III Quadrant IV
Lack of responsibilityGuilt
Not successful in any job
THE SLACKER
Time Management Matrix Quadrant II Personality
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g y
Urgent Not urgent
Impo
rtant
Notimpo
rtan
t
Quadrant I
Quadrant II
Control of your life
Balance
Discipline
High performance
Few crisis
THE PRIORITIZER
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80% of the results flow from 20% ofthe activities
Pareto principle
Time Management Matrix
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Urgent Not urgent
Important
Notimpo
rta
nt
Friend gets injured
Late for work
Project due today
Vehicle breaks down
Paper due in a week
Exercise
Relaxation
Planning, Goal setting
Unimportant phone calls
Others small problems
Peer pressure
Interruptions
Too much TV
Endless phone calls
Work politics
Other time wasters
THE PROCRASTINATOR
THE YES MAN THE SLACKER
THE PRIORITIZER
Time Management Matrix
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How can we be prioritizers
Shrink Quadrant 1 by procrastinating less
Say NO to quadrant 3 activities
Cut down on Quadrant 4 Slacker activities
Pick up a planner
Plan weekly Identify Big / Important tasks eg Self education,
time with friends, exercise 3 times this week etc etc
Block out time for these Big / Important tasks
Schedule everything else after scheduling the bigtasks
Adapt daily
We all need to become Quadrant II self
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We all need to become Quadrant II selfmanagers
Identify roles
Proactive faculty, colleague, friend,
son / daughter,
brother /sister
Individual
Select Goals in the next 1 year, I would improve myself as a human being, be more
positive, proactive and helpful to people. I must have more closerrelationships that what I have today
Detailed areas of Activity Introspect every day for 30 minutes on what I could have done well and what
I did well
Observe people on areas that they are better than me and get to know them,
Try to be more positive all the time introspect as to why I am not,
Proactively commit to time with friends every week, Take time out every week to help people etc etc
Daily Planning -
The weekly planner
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The weekly planner
M Y W E EK L Y P L A N
R o l e s Faculty, friend, Son / daughter,Individual
M o n d a y T u e sd a y W e d n e sd a yT h u r sd a y F rid a y S a tu r d a y S u n d a y
A M 5 . 0 0 - 6 . 0 0
6 . 0 0 - 7 . 0 0
7 . 0 0 - 8 . 0 0
8 . 0 0 - 9 . 0 0
9 . 0 0 - 1 0 . 0 0
1 0 . 0 0 - 1 1 . 0 0
1 1 . 0 0 - 1 2 . 0 0
P M 1 2 . 0 0 - 1 . 0 0
1 . 0 0 - 2 . 0 0
2 . 0 0 - 3 . 0 0
3 . 0 0 - 4 . 0 0
4 . 0 0 - 5 . 0 0
5 . 0 0 - 6 . 0 0
6 . 0 0 - 7 . 0 0
7 . 0 0 - 8 . 0 0
8 . 0 0 - 9 . 0 0
9 . 0 0 - 1 0 . 0 0
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The key is not to prioritize whatson your schedule
but to schedule your priorities
Lets revisit the question we asked
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Let s revisit the question we askedourselves early:
What are the top 4 activities that currentlytake up most of your time
What are the top 4 activities you would like tospend most of your time
Which quadrant do these answers fit in?
Where do we falter in habit 3 Putting
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Where do we falter in habit 3 Puttingfirst things first:
It is not our inability to prioritize?
It is our inability of overcome fear and peerpressure.
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Comfort zone and courage zone Comfort zone
Things I enjoy doing Easy to do Relaxation Freedom from risk Things I am accustomed to
Courage zone Things that I am afraid of Things that I have never tried Hard moments Things that are difficult Opportunity Bravery Higher duty
Never let your fears
make your decisions
Some of the things you could do in
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Some of the things you could do incourage zone
Make a new friend
Resist peer pressure
Break an old habit
Develop a new skill
Try out for a team Be yourself
Never let your fears make your decisions
Be strong in hard moments
Where do we falter in habit 3 Putting
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Where do we falter in habit 3 Puttingfirst things first:
It is not our inability to prioritize?
It is our inability of overcome fear and peerpressure.
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Overcoming peer pressureSaying NO when all your friends are saying YES needs raw courage
To overcome peer pressure, youve got to care more about what thinkof you that what your peers think of you
Peer pressure is hard to resist because you are dying to belong
Not all peer pressure is bad
How do you overcome Peer pressure
Build self confidence and self respect build it step by step, makepromises to yourself and keep it, help someone in need, develop atalent, forge your own path
Write a mission statement and set goals
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What can I do today to start this Habit
Set a goal to use a Planner for one montheveryday
Identify your biggest time waster and work toreduce it in the next one week
Think of something that you haveprocrastinated for long block time this week inyour planned to get it done
Say no to something that you believe is not yourpriority for the day today
Identify the people who have the most influenceon you ask yourself Am I doing what I want todo or what they want me to do
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Being ProactiveBegin with the end in mind
Managing time
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How will the success habits help you
Get control of your life
Make smarter decisions
Improve your relationships with your friends
Get along better with society
Define your values what matters more toyou
Get more done in less time
Find balance between work, family, friendsand everything else
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The Seven habitshe Seven habits 1. Be proactive Take responsibility for your life
2. Begin with the end in mind Define your missionand goals in life
3. Put first things first prioritize, and do the mostimportant things in life
4. Think Win Win have an everyone can winattitude
5. Seek first to understand and then to beunderstood Listen to people sincerely
6. Synergise Work together to achieve more
7. Sharpen the Saw Renew yourself regularly
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What is success? Success is the continuous
journey towardsachievement ofpredetermined worth-while goals - Tom Hopkins
The important thing is notwhere you were or whereyou are but where you wantto get.
Successful people do thingswhich unsuccessful people fail
to do Prioritise
Action
Start early
Follow-up
Encourage
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I would like to contribute to your success further Ifyou want, you can reach me for one on oneconsultations - please mail me at
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Thank you