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For the purposes of IB English A

Chief SupervisorsMagdalena JunkielesDanuta GrycaArticle authorsDaria MorajskaWojtek NawrockiAda PuciskaAgata PiekarskaMateusz wioPiotr ReszelAlex DbskaKarolina KuakowskaMicha JeznachEwa KiliskaEditorial boardKlara BirchleyMicha JeznachDunin KarwickiEwa KiliskaMarta KudelskaAleksandra MudelAgata Piekarska

Dilly MailCOPERNICUS HIGH SCHOOL PUBLICATIONS LTD.Letter from the editorial boardKnown as the day when Susan Boyle and Gmail were born, the first of April is celebrated around the world in variety of ways. Australia, Luxembourg and Russia hold Edible Book Festival, but in the countries where books have more educational than nutritious values, the main holiday is called April Fools Day. As we all know its the day when serious activities should be avoided and making jokes and pranks is highly advisable.On Huntigowk Day, as Scots used to call it, people play different games to amuse or annoy their relatives and relatively close strangers. In France, Belgium, Canada and all other countries where French is spoken, people play April fish game, which includes attempting to attach a paper fish to the victim's back without being noticed. In 1683 Polish alliance with Leopold I was backdated to 31st of March, because of the strong conviction that it wont be taken seriously. Distinction between fact or fiction has always been problematic on April Fools Day.Can you tell if the facts around you are real or fake?More TOK? (Not) OK!First year IB students of famous Copernicus High School are about to receive an additional hour of Theory of Knowledge classes per week.
Up until now, the first year IB class of Copernicus High School has only had 2 hours of TOK teaching a week. However, this is about to change abruptly, much to many students' dismay. The school's headmistress declared that the class is in a dire need of additional TOK classes. 'There's no way they will write a satisfying TOK essay next year unless something is changed' she says. 'They need special treatment'.Howbeit, the students' response isn't as enthusiastic. 'Even now we Kant get good Marx in TOK' says enigmatically El Doonine. 'I feel Freuded, this is not what I pay my monthly fee for! They left us no Joyce' he adds with frustration, regretting having invested so much money in the International Baccalaureate programme. 'It's pathology' replies concisely El Moosiau, a student known for his penchant for arguing with TOK teachers.On the other hand, the teachers are much more keen on the idea. 'TOK is vital for healthy development of the teenage brain. Even though we have seen reports of students falling into permanent coma after prolonged exposure to TOK, exceptions are there to prove the rule', says one of TOK teachers.Students' efforts to prevent the inevitable are bound to fail. The headmistress vowed to take extreme measures should anyone attempt to sabotage her decree. Those include extra hours to do for CAS, incarceration in the B wing with a bunch of hyperactive 'gimbi' or permanent ban from playing table tennis at school.Betrayal?!
Well-known and popular John (name changed for the sake of anonymity) from the IB class was spotted last Friday at Batory High School with a beautiful blonde young lady. It is not a secret that Batory has always been Copernicus biggest enemy. What can explain such behaviour?
We were informed that John had lately had problems with physics. Maybe he finally realised that the level of his current school is too high and decided to lower his standards by changing the school? The only different explanation is a simple date, but does his girlfriend know about it? It is very sad that the fame that he acquired after the 'Taming of the Shrew' play made him forget about his old love...
John we have only one advice for you think your whole life over...A giant leap for kebab
Two students were admitted to hospital yesterday with serious injuries after jumping out of the window on the first floor of Copernicus High School in Warsaw.
Yesterday, during the lunch break, Robert Mieczyk (17) and Adam Kowalski (17) in a desperate need for food, tried to escape their school through a window. Their efforts proved futile as landing on the pavement caused more damage than the students had anticipated. Shortly after the accident, they were taken to hospital, each with a broken leg.
'We were really hungry and since everyone knows the cafeteria food is inedible, we decided to go out for a kebab. It seemed like the only good option. The janitor didn't allow us to exit the school through the front entrance so we had to find another way out' said Robert, explaining their decision to escape through the window.
The students' fall was immediately noticed by a teacher who was giving a lecture in a classroom on the ground floor. 'I have never been so scared before in my life' the teacher admitted. 'Seeing students fly by your window is not an everyday occurrence'.
This situation could have been avoided if only the school's caterer provided the school with better food. 'We will certainly pay closer attention to the quality of the food served in the cafeteria from now on' promised principal Matejczyk. 'A new catering company was chosen and next week it will start supplying the school's cafeteria'.First move towards toilet justiceEver wondered why there is no toilet paper when it's needed? One of the cleaning ladies of our school has solved the mystery.The high school second grader K. was caught red-handed on the second floor this Tuesday. The cleaning lady was on her usual way around bathrooms, unclogging sinks and water closets, into which students like to drop bad-graded tests and sandwiches. As she later confessed, all ofthe toilets she had visited were paperless that day.Getting onto the second floor, she heard a weird noise coming from the ladies' toilet. The thief was already there unreeling the paper in a hurry, but hearing the steps, he vanished in one of the stalls. He would probably get away with it ifheremembered to tear the paper away before locking the door. You don't have to be a detective to follow such an easy trail. The cleaning lady, who definitely did not expect to become a school hero inaminute, pretended to leave the bathroom, but actually prepared an ambush behind the door.This way the thief got caught and was immediately brought to justice. He asked not to publish his name for the sake of the school reputation and, as students, our reporters and editors can understand that. Butdon't fear, he faced the consequences of such socially harmful behavior.As far as we know, the toilet thievery has been a problem for months and our thief is not the only one to blame. The cleaning lady has already recruited a special squad, which consists of both teachers and trusted students, to find other criminals among the school society. Remember, that you can help too!The shrew got tamedA great show performed by the class 2GOn January 12th at 5:30pm the class 2G gave an amazing performance of a new version of Shakespeares Taming of the Shrew.The play took a new spin thanks to Zuzanna Woodkos adjustments in the script, which made the audience laugh really hard. Premiere night entirely filled the theatre with people and the show received standing ovations. Rehearsals started in October, so the preparations for the play took more than 3 months. But it seems hard work pays off because the new Taming of the Shrew made a great impression on the viewers. I have never laughed so hard in a theatre. This was just wonderful! said the principal, Mrs. Matejczyk. I like the way everything was transferred to the current times said one of the viewers. In fact, it was an extremely hard thing to do, but it turned out great. Luckily, this was not the one and only performance of Taming of the Shrew. Since the premiere night class 2G performed on Friday, February 20th at 6:30pm, at a prestigious arts festival called UFO. Also, they took part in Kopernikalia and became celebrities at Copernicus Bilingual High School. I feel like we can make it to Bollywood some day said Tien Chu, one of the actors. If they really get to Bollywood at some point, then hopefully theyll make a scene there!Invisible threat causes evacuationAn evacuation of the entire Copernicus High School was ordered on Tuesday.Over four hundred confused students and teachers stood three hours on the sidewalk, in freezing weather, waiting for the fire brigade to secure the building. The alert was caused, according to unofficial sources, by a ghost. Robert J., who supposedly saw the phantom, refuses to comment on the incident. In response to questions, the head teacher of the school, Matylda Jaworska, has issued a press statement apologising for the distress caused and the poorly conducted evacuation. I have never seen any ghosts at school said Ania Kowalska, 18-year-old senior I never imagined we could be evacuated due to something other than a fire. The parents of the students were no less surprised; several of them have already threatened to press charges. This is a gross negligence, not to mention an absurd lack of professionalism stated one of the mothers gathered in the schools office. During World War II, the high school building served as a hospital and, according to students, the ghost seen by prof. Robert J. could have been a spirit of one of the patients. This is a first evacuation reported in the UK that was caused by an invisible threat.Football coach arrested during trainingThe coach of a local football team KS Wolka was arrested yesterday near Copernicus High during training before a major match.The police say he is accused of managing a widespread hard drug manufacturing and selling operation.Our informants cannot reveal any more information, but we do know, that the charges are very serious and the coach is facing a life sentence.The police have been investigating this case since two years ago, and just recently were pointed at an important lead by an undisclosed source.Yesterday at about 10 am. GROM anti-terrorist teams arrived at the football pitch near Bema Street and arrested the coach, immediately terminating the team's training.The field was then closed off and thoroughly searched for the rest of the day.'They could've at least let us finish the training. We are very stressed because of the upcoming match, and we feel like we really lost a lot today due to the police bursting in like that and closing the area.', says Mariusz ebski, the team's captain.The police were not able to find evidence of any illicit activity and had to reopen the team training grounds the following morning.The lack of evidence raises serious questions about the honesty of the informant who provided this lead to the police.Moreover, the well planned, instant and successful action, a very rare sight in our civil protection forces' history, suggests some form of corruption.'This must be a sabotage. Without the coach we are likely to lose tomorrow! We will surely report this to the Central Anticorruption Bureau (CBA) and demand serious investigation', says Mr. ebski.We wish KS Wolka all the best and hope for a positive outcome in the match tomorrow.You shouldn't have put a ring on itFilled with love and hope, Jake C. proposed to Clara M. during yesterdays lunch break, but nobody expected a huge heartbreak his girlfriend gave him with her instant refusal.Many heart-melting and heartrending moments had happened in our school, but none of them can compare with yesterdays event. After the 5th period the lunch break began and the second grade student Jake C. walked through the whole school to meet his girlfriend, Clara M. near the cafeteria on the first floor.Witnesses have confirmed that she looked nervous and uneasy that day. According to her friend, whod like to remain anonymous, Her hands were shaking from the beginning of the day, she definitely expected something unusual and I could tell she didnt want it to come. Around 12.35 pm, Jake C. approached her and without any explanation kneeled in front of her, pulling the ring in a black box out of his pocket. Will you marry me, Clara?, he asked and all the students around them gasped, waiting for Claras response. But as witnesses confirmed, she didnt say a word. Copernicus High School has never seen such a disappointment as the one appearing on the face of the groom-never-to-be. He got up, quickly left the corridor and burst into tears, leaving the crowd amused.The walls of our school had seen many dreams never coming true, but this was more than tragic. We can only hope that it will become a cautionary tale to all young lovers in our school.Termites running amok in Copernicus HighYESTERDAY afternoon, termites were confirmed to be causing widespread damage in Copernicus High in Warsaw. Among the most affected places are the historical hallways and first floor classrooms in the middle school wing. The termite damage is spreading across the entire building at an alarming rate and it is feared that further damage is unstoppable.It is still uncertain where the termites originally came from. Many staff members suspect that it was from an ill-fated biological experiment involving these insects, however no evidence has been found to support this.The first reports of 'munched' wood started appearing in early February. Due to the concerns of both teachers and students, the school administration called for an inspector. His report indisputably confirmed the presence of termites. Concerning safety inspector Jakub Rok aged 46 commented unenthusiastically: 'I'm afraid that this school no longer fully satisfies the OSH standards after this unfortunate incident. If the situation does not change in a matter of days, then the building will have to be closed off'.The school administration is now discussing possible solutions for the termite problem, however since its full scale is yet to be seen, it is difficult to choose the most appropriate method.'Our historic building, dating back to 1927, is an important part of Warsaw' says headmistress of Copernicus High, Maria Kowalska. 'It has withstood the test of time and managed through the better and the worse. We can't simply abandon it'.Words, words, words... don't flowKopernik High School's 'Koperek' ensures it is always the 'freshest' but recently, its contents is anything but ripe.Lowering standards of the newspaper alert teachers and students while its endangered future frightens the columnists themselves. Students at the Kopernik High School are slowly losing interest with every newly published Koperek and IB journalists are devastated.While in September 2014, everyone awaited upcoming issues, in February no one even remembers about this student initiative unless a copy appears on their desks. What started off as a creative project now seems to be a burden, dragged along by a tired board and reporters that don't even know each other well. Worst-case scenarios have been plotted already, including abandoning 'Koperek' altogether, which would be a severe blow to some IB students, who treat the newspaper as part of their CAS program.Featured articles are sometimes starting to resemble school homework handed in late, scribbled frantically with the help of the Internet. Although a few dedicated authors remain, most have given up on good writing.Why is that so? Tiredness and lack of time seem to consume even the toughest in the mid-term season. Reader Marta Kudelska comments: 'It's just not gripping anymore...and the people involved aren't standing as a team, so every article is on its own'. 'We are more and more tired' writer Ewelina Dbrowska defends. 'And it is starting to have an effect'. Hopefully the upcoming spring will curb the obvious writer's block and communication problems.1.

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1. A genius lives there.2. If not 'Koperek', then...3. These magic keys open the gates of our school. We can't imagine our life without them.4. Worth more than gold in Copernicus High.5. The most popular sport in Copernicus High.6. Our school cafeteria serves delicious...7. The trademark accessory of professor Gaz.8. The Cerberi of Copernicus High. They won't let anyone out.9. Some are delightful, some are barely edible. Whence they come?!The strictest teacher of our school. He never gives good grades, always punishes absence and eats kittens.

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