PEER MENTORING HANDBOOK

2012/13

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Thank you for being willing to share your skills and experience with another on this programme!

This manual has been designed as a general reference guide for you as you help a mentor on the BME peer mentoring scheme.

True and effective mentoring is a valuable form of personal, business or social activity that focuses on developing the needs of an individual, at times of transition.

It involves a professional relationship between an experienced person (Mentor) who shares knowledge, experience and insights with a less experienced person (Mentee) for an identified period of time. Mentors act as a supportive ear for problems, queries or issues, and a catalyst for understanding the issue and its possible solutions. As well as the obvious benefits to mentees, mentors can benefit by gaining the opportunity to practice and develop skills that are beneficial in their own professional development.

Mentoring is an impact intervention and both parties must commit to the relationship, add value and support each other to achieve desired results!

Key factors for a productive mentoring relationship include:

Confidentiality Willingness to be open Honesty Responsibility for one’s action Goal orientated Outcome driven

Practicalities:

This project is relatively short term and it is expected that the mentor and mentee will be in contact with each other face-to-face once a month, but in contact via email or phone once a week.

Please note that the term ‘mentor’ and ‘coach’ are used interchangeably in this guide.

This manual will contain many tips for best practice, do’s and don’ts and templates that you may wish to use within your mentoring relationship.

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Whilst, all the information contained is based on practical advice and experience, there may be instances where you may wish to change your approach of work based on the situation or potential impacts within your mentoring relationship.

If this is the case, please do not hesitate to contact one of the University of Birmingham Project Coordinators, for additional advice and support.

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CONTENTS

Information Page

Introduction 2

Contents Page 3

Mentoring as a powerful tool 4

Difference between Coaching and Mentoring 5

Overview of Mentoring Process 6

General Tips 7

How to be a good mentor 8

Essential Mentoring Skills 9

Tips for the First Mentoring meeting 10

Importance of Confidentiality 11

Do’s and Don’ts Tips 12

Time Management 13

Effective Planning 14

Frequently Asked Questions 15

SWOT Analysis / Learning Contract (con) 16

Learning Contract 17

Evaluation of Meetings / Goal Setting 18

Recommended Links / Project Coordinators Details 19

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Why is mentoring such a powerful tool?

Mentoring allows the exploration of new ways of thinking, making decisions and creating sustainable impact.

The advantages of being involved in a Mentoring relationship for the Mentee can include:

• Assistance with application forms and interview techniques

• Increased confidence

• Help with working through difficult issues in dealing with other people • Having a sounding board to try ideas out on

• Being able to draw on someone else’s experience

• Someone to confide in who will provide you with moral support,encouragement and guidance

• A greater understanding of the professional environment

• Constructive criticism and help in sizing up situations

• The chance to keep abreast of other ways of thinking and to discover new perspectives

• The opportunity to expand your networks of professional contacts

Mentors also gain in several ways and many of the benefits detailed above apply equally to those involved as a Mentor.

The process of helping the Mentee brings them to insights of their own, as an increased understanding of a different way of thinking or perception can create an opportunity to practice and develop skills that are almost always beneficial in their own professional development.

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Key Difference between Coaching and Mentoring

Coaching and Mentoring share many similarities as both methods of support, enable an individual to follow the advice and path of a usually older and wiser individual.

Through confidential, one to one meetings mentees put their trust in their mentor to pass on knowledge and experience at the right time, helping to fine tune and develop skills and eliminate ways of thinking and action that create negative results.

However, there are a number of distinct differences between the two approaches:

Coaching is a process that enables learning and development to occur, based on the core development of a specific skill or talent, therefore enabling performance to improve.

Mentoring is a structured, sustained process for supporting individuals through significant career and life transitions. This is of particular help to those starting out from University.

It involves providing direct help to an individual to make their own significant transitions in knowledge, work or thinking. It is a relationship rather than an activity.

A Mentor may often have no direct experience of their mentee's direct occupational goal but will provide additional support to work on specific goals. A good mentor will understand when it is relevant to guide the mentee and when it is relevant to enable the mentee to search for their own solutions.

The aim is not to breed dependence, but to assist the mentee to explore new avenues and reach new conclusions for themselves.

COACHING v MENTORING

Short term relationship Long term relationship Task focused Focus on progress Develops skills Develops capabilities Coach is required to demonstrate Mentor guides mentee to

where the individual went wrong to work it out themselves

Requires explicit feedback Mentor provides intuitive feedback Driven by coach Driven by mentee

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The Process of Mentoring

Build Rapport

Building Rapport is a process that should precede any Mentoring discussion. The aim is to build a level of relationship based on an appreciation on each others personalities, ability to connect and willingness to commit long-term within the relationship.

Mentoring Agreement

Both parties draw up and agree the ‘ground rules’ of the Mentoring relationship.

This first discussion between mentor and menthe agreements should therefore cover issues such as:

• Roles - What each party expects from the other in terms of how they will undertake to behave during the session.

• Objectives - What does the mentee hope to achieve from the session? What objectives does the Mentor hope to achieve?

• Boundaries - Agreement as to the topics or subject areas which are not suitable for discussion. For example, to what extent is personal background relevant? Agree what should happen if a highly sensitive area should become relevant.

• Timing - How long will this meeting last? Are there any constraints which either party should be aware of?

• Additional Parties – Are they any other individuals that may need to be involved at any stage and in what capacity? How will this affect the mentoring relationship?

This process provides a good outline for the areas you should try to cover in the first meeting between mentor and mentee.

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Agreeing Change

Once the issues have been identified, the mentor and mentee must work together to explore possible solutions.

It is not for the mentor to tell the mentee what to do, or to start from the point of view that the Mentor (from their vast experience and broader perspective) knows best!

The mentor must focus on the principles of encouragement, support and guidance to allow the mentee to reach their own conclusions. This can include giving advice from a Mentor’s own experience or directing the mentee to other sources of information.

Agreeing action points to implement a change is an important step in helping the mentee move forward.

Application

It is then for the Mentee to apply the action points. This stage may also involve getting feedback from supervisors, testing alternative solutions and identifying the outcomes of what was discussed with their Mentor.

Evaluation

It is important that both parties provide regular feedback on the other party’s performance in their role within the relationship.

What If A Relationship Isn’t Working?

Although every effort is made to ensure that suitable pairings are made, an issue may arise within the mentoring relationship. It may be an issue on the part of either the Mentee or the Mentor.

In the first instance try to discuss the issues openly; use the feedback guidelines to resolve problems.

If the situation proves difficult to resolve (for whatever reason), please feel free to contact the scheme organisers for confidential advice and guidance, or mediation, should it be required.

We are hopeful that all of our relationships will be successful; however, occasionally a relationship which we match doesn’t work because of individual characteristics or personalities. In these or other circumstances, one party may wish to withdraw from the relationship and either be re-matched, or withdraw from the scheme altogether.

The project coordinators can assist in these circumstances with a separation of the relationship, which will be documented and sign by both parties in agreement of dissolution.

Both the mentee and mentor will then be re-matched if both parties would like to continue and no fault or serious issue has been identified.

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How To Be A Good Mentor

A Mentor has many roles within the relationship:

Encouragement

The Motivator role is about encouraging the Mentee, helping them to envisage what they could achieve and how it would feel. It also involves picking them up when they reach a blockage; reminding them how they have overcome other difficult challenges.

A good analogy would be persuading someone who falls of their bike and build up a fear each time they attempt to ride again – a good mentor would help the rider to understand the powerful impact of failure as a lesson learnt through experience.

Challenging

The Goal-Setter role is about helping the Mentee set his or her own goals. This involves assistance with breaking a large task into smaller chunks, with a clear achievement at the end of each. Planner

The Observer role involves giving accurate, helpful feedback about the Mentee’s performance. It requires objectivity, but not aloofness.

Support

The Professional Friend role is partly about developing the level of trust, at which the Mentee will be able to discuss openly the internal blockages to his or her performance improvement.

It is imperative that the mentor knows what role he/she is adopting at all times with their mentee – failure to do so can erode trust and confidence within the relationship.

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Necessary Mentoring Skills Active Listening

Remember that the key to good listening is not just that you feel that you have ‘received’ the information that you believe is important, but that the other person knows that you have heard and understood what they have said.

It is important that both the Mentor and Mentee actively listen to what each other have to say.

Active listening is not ‘passive hearing’ and active listening is not necessarily about agreeing with the person. It is an essential component to good Mentoring practice. Key components of active listening include:

Demonstrating 100% attention Reflecting back information Clarifying your understanding Reflecting feelings Summarising the conversation

Exploring with Questions

A critical factor in relationship building is creating ‘empathy’ – the ability to fully understand a person’s situation from their own perception or ‘in their shoes’.

A key skill for a good Mentor to master is the ability to achieve empathy through understanding, which relies on good questioning and encouragement of the other person. Mentees should also take the opportunity to ask questions of their Mentor to gain an insight into their experience.

Ask Open Questions Using open questions encourages the speaker to broaden or deepen their contribution. A good open question will encourage the speaker to select a response which they believe to be important i.e. they are ‘open’ to interpret the content of their response. Key words to start an open question include: “What?” “When?” “How?” “Who?”

Encouragement Sometimes it is sufficient to simply encourage the other person to continue to add comment. Simple phrases such as “Go on….” “ Tell me more about….” “What happened next…?” will enable them to delve deeper and supply more information.

Beware The Use Of “Why?” Whilst establishing a motivation or reason for something will be critical in many situations, overuse of “why?” questions may create an uncomfortable environment.

This is especially the case when the use of “why?” puts others on the spot or makes them feel like they are having to justify themselves, when this occurs it can limit the contribution and openness as the other person may feel defensive

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The beginnings of a Mentoring Relationship – First Meeting

There are no set rules for how a Mentoring relationship should work and develop. That depends on the individuals involved and how much or little assistance the Mentee needs at any point in time.

The Mentee should be the driving force in any Mentoring Relationship and it is up to the Mentee to make contact with the Mentor, arrange meetings and keep to any deadlines set. With this in mind, a good guide for keeping to goals and associated deadlines is as follows:

*Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Timebound

REPEAT THE ABOVE PROCESS FOR EACH MEETING

Time keeping

Ensure that you arrive a min of 15 minutess before for meetings and events. This will give both you and the mentee time to compose your thoughts and make any final preparations for the meeting.

Give as much notice as possible if you are unable to meet your mentee for any reason.

WRITE UP THE KEY POINTS FROM THE MEETING

Ensure confidentiality of records and maintain them so you remember what has been agreed and deadlines set.

PLAN AND AGREE THE NEXT MEETING

Keep the meetings as positive and possible. Explore negativities with a focus on improvement and progress.

FORMULATE AND AGREE THE LEARNING CONTRACT

It is essential that the first meeting is focused on setting the details for the Mentoring Agreement. This will shape the future progress of your relationship and help to maintain boundaries and discipline.

PLAN YOUR LEARNING NEEDS

The final phase of the first meeting should be based around initial areas of support and identification of potential barriers that may hinder progress.

There should be an agreement to look at these initial areas in the second meeting, with a view to setting more tangible goals but this will depend on the level of rapport that you have both built with each other.

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Importance of Confidentiality

The most important things that we ask that anyone who participates in the scheme to commit to are basic principles of confidentiality and professional ethics – values that individuals will no doubt be required to exercise in their day to day professional working life in any event.

Mentees should take the opportunity to get to grips with these principles as early as possible as they will prove to be an essential skill in working life.

It is essential in order to promote a relationship based on trust that anything discussed during the course of a Mentoring meeting remains entirely confidential. In some cases, the Mentee will not wish that others know they have a Mentor (or who they are).

In some discussions a Mentor may disclose something in order to help the Mentee; this too is a confidential matter and should be respected as such by the Mentee.

It is inevitable that the personal history and/or issues of a Mentee will become part of a Mentoring discussion. It is not strictly off-limits, but both parties should be guided by the agreement of ‘boundaries’ and should agree appropriate levels of comfortability beforehand.

You may find that there is a personal angle that is useful to pursue, but this should only be undertaken with the express permission of the other person.

Please exercise judgment when dealing with personal history. If you discover that, in the course of a Mentoring session, you have touched upon something that requires extreme sensitivity, advise your mentee that you have to contact the project coordinators.

The project coordinator will then take appropriate action to resolve the issue identified in the most efficient manner which protects the welfare and safety of the mentee, in the first instance – this will involve contacting the police or any other designated service as necessary.

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General Dos and Don’ts of best practice

DO:

Prepare for your meetings

Be prepared to listen

Be clear about your motives

Take your diary to meetings with your Mentor

Be on time at least 15 minutes before

Help your mentee to stay positive as often as possible

How many others CAN YOU THINK OF? List them below:

DON’T:

Expect your mentee to always have the answer – remember the role that you must adopt

Be afraid to positively challenge what your mentee says or suggests

Blame your mentee if your advice doesn’t work out – help your mentee to source effective solutions

Use the meeting as a therapy based session for yourself

Blame your mentee if they do not achieve goals set – focus on lessons learnt and points for improvement

How many others CAN YOU THINK OF? List them below:

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TIME MANAGEMENT

One of the major causes of Stress is bad time management or being unable to control your use of time.

If a Mentee sets deadlines with a Mentor to achieve tasks and then does not keep to those deadlines it can be difficult for them to make the most out of the relationship.

Some people do manage their time well, others do not and have the feeling that the have been busy all day and achieved nothing. The consequence is that jobs do not get done, people become stressed and the situation can spiral out of control causing less and less to be done effectively. When applications are being made this can mean that they are rushed and do not do the Mentee justice or that important deadlines are missed.

To make the most out of the help a mentor can give Mentees should try to prepare things in advance to allow for an opportunity to review any applications or issues with their Mentor and resolve them before a deadline is met.

To manage our time better we need to ask ourselves three questions:

What am I doing that does not need to be done?

Collecting/creating work for its own sake Carrying out tasks that we don’t need to do Doing ‘nice to do tasks’ before priority tasks

What do I do that wastes other people’s time?

Being late for appointments Missing appointments Cancelling appointments at short notice Lack of preparation for meetings No time management systems Giving others vague or inaccurate instructions

To solve these problems you will have to think about:

- Not advocating unnecessary tasks.

- Supporting your mentee in order of priority, not what you would like to do first - Negotiating realistic deadlines and if a deadline becomes unrealistic, renegotiating it before work becomes due

- Developing a personal system that ensures you do not waste the time of others.

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Planning The best way to deal with time management problems is to ensure that you are doing the right task at the right time.

The way to achieve this is to Plan. By helping your mentee to plan, you are being pro-active and helping them to schedule their goals / tasks, rather than being reactive and always responding to the demands of others.

Methods There are a number of methods that you can use to manage your time. The most beneficial is the use of a diary. You need to ensure that you record all the details accurately. When recording Mentoring meetings include what preparations and possible paperwork you may need as well as contact phone numbers and the purpose of the meetings. Don’t forget to include any necessary travelling time in your diary.

Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail!

Things to Do Importance Time PercentageThing you Must Do Most Important Tasks 75%Things you Should Do Next Important Tasks 20%Thing you’d Like to Do Least Important Tasks 5%

As you can see from the chart, mentee should be spending most of their time on the most important tasks. It is important to remember that you may allocate a task as the next most important. However, if it is not dealt with it will move up a level and become most important and then urgent. Thus you are back into crisis management again. Whatever importance you assign to any task they still need to be done and an unimportant task will move up the hierarchy if left undone.

How you actually manage your time will depend on your personal circumstances. By analysing what you are doing you will have a better insight into what you are actually doing to help rather than what you think you are doing to help.

If you then go on to Plan your time you will ensure that you get things done on time. By planning well and carefully you will find that you actually have more time to spend on doing the interesting things that give you pleasure and you will avoid the total frustration of continual crisis management. This is a difficult skill to master. However, if a student can master this skill at university it will be invaluable in their future career.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS QUESTION

ANSWER

What do I do if there is a personality clash?

Naturally, discuss the causes and effects with your mentee to find a solution. If that doesn’t work, contact your Mentoring Project Co-coordinator.

What if I do not live up to the mentee’s expectations?

A natural fear. Discuss expectations of each other at your introductory meeting. Remember that you are both in control of the relationship and should develop the Mentoring Relationship at your pace.

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What if I am not from the same profession that a Mentee wishes to enter?

The objective of the scheme is to develop skills that are transferable to any workplace, e.g. communication, time management, decision making. If a Mentee require specialist help that the Mentor cannot provide, then discuss these needs with your Mentoring Project Co-coordinator.

Can I arrange to be matched to a mentee of the same gender and cultural background?

If you have specifically requested this option, we will try to match that need but it may not always be possible. Again, you will be matched with individuals who may wish to gain learning and insight into your cultural background.

How are mentors chosen? They volunteer their valuable time and resources. All our Mentors are professionals who work across the business, community, voluntary, and creative sectors and this is one way for them to give something back to their community.

Mentees have exams and assignments to complete and will be under pressure to complete the tasks. What do I do?

Discuss your time commitments with your mentee as soon as they know what they’re likely to be. Meetings and learning tasks can be arranged around the affected dates.

What happens if I need to cancel an appointment with my Mentee?

As a matter of courtesy, inform your Mentor/Mentee in advance of the meeting. If they cannot be contacted, leave a message.

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SELF ANALYSIS

S W O T ANALYSIS

As a Mentor, before beginning the Mentoring Relationship, it is wise to analyse your Strengths and Weaknesses. Be self-critical and honest. If you are unsure about the factors, ask others close to you who will give constructive and objective feedback.

Following that, identify Opportunities to practice or correct any Strengths or Weaknesses. Finally, identify any Threats that may stop or hinder you in achieving any goals. Do not use Threats as an excuse for not doing anything. Remember, with effort comes reward.

Before your first meeting you should carry out the following SWOT analysis of yourself:

• STRENGTHS (What I’m good at – look at skills [computers, numbers, tools] accomplishments and areas of expertise.

• WEAKNESSES (What I need to improve, new skills needed, work experience or knowledge)

• OPPORTUNITIES (Action I can take to improve the weaknesses – advice from peers, personal research)

• THREATS (Any personal or work circumstances that can affect the achievement of becoming a positive and effective mentor, i.e. own personal circumstances and their potential impacts.

Learning Contract Another tool that works well is The Learning Contract. This is an agreement that both the Mentor and Mentee can sign and commit to.

The purpose is to clearly state intentions and what a Mentee hopes to gain from the Mentoring experience so that both parties understand what they will be doing and what is expected of them whilst the Mentoring Scheme is in progress.

Areas that should be focused on include:

Personal Skills Development • Communication skills • Time management • Teamwork • Presentation • Preparation and planning • Organisation skills

Academic Skills Development • Style • Grammar • Maintaining relationships with lecturing staff

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Professional Skills Development • Telephone techniques • Approaching employers • Interview skills • CVs and application forms • Professional Behaviour• Development of Soft Skills

Confidence Building • Encouragement • Befriending • Career development • Awareness of cultural differences • Handling discrimination

Please find an example of a Learning Contract on the next page:

Learning Contract - Mentee

Section Task Date to completed

Evidenced Signed Mentee

Signed Mentor

Personal Development

Professional Development

Academic Development

Confidence Building

Other?

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Evaluation of your Mentoring Meetings

After each Mentoring meeting it is important to consider what progress has been made and what plans have been put in place for the future. It is useful before the meeting to have a set of objectives you wish to achieve.

The evaluation process allows a Mentee to consider all of this.

1 Was I adequately prepared for the meeting?2 What went well?3 What went not as well?4 What did I learn?5 Did I achieve my objectives?6 Was the Mentee adequately prepared for the meeting?7 What could I have done to help my mentee prepare better?8 Did I contribute effectively during the meeting?9 Did I feedback information in a clear and concise manner?10 How can I put the learning to good use?11 What could I have done better or differently?12 What do I have to prepare for the next meeting?13 Anything else?

Goal Setting Chart for next meeting

Notes of Mentor Meetings Meeting 1 – Date____________________Targets achieved in last meeting

Areas for improvement from last meeting

Targets for our next Meeting

Date for targets set

Additional support needs to achieve targets

Signed Mentee

Signed Mentor

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Websites & Books

Further information about Mentoring and useful techniques to implement in your relationships can be found on the following websites and books:

www.coachingnetwork.co.uk www.Mentoring-uk.org.uk www.nwrel.org www.Mentoringgroup.com www.clutterbuckassociates.com

Recommended reference books

TITLE AUTHORThe Mentoring Pocket Book Alfred, Garvey & SmithCoaching & Mentoring Parsloe & WrayThe Art of Mentoring Mike PeggMentoring in Action Megginson & ClutterbuckMentoring Gordon

Contact Details of BME Employability Project Coordinators

Jane TopeEquality Adviser, University of BirminghamOffice: 0121 414 3247Email:d.j.tope@bham.ac.uk

Joel Graham-BlakeFounder, MD of Cultiv8 SolutionsDirect Tel: 07983 991 943Email: joel@cultiv8solutions.com

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