E-mail Tips

DO:• Use descriptive subject lines• Emphasize the most important information• Be careful with jokes• Read it out loud• Send to the right people

Marketing Staff vs. New additions to Marketing Staff

Meeting vs. Mandatory Meeting Feb. 9

Status of Proposal vs. Proposal Approved

Descriptive Subject Lines

E-mail Tips

DON’T:• Write what you wouldn’t want others to read• Use e-mail:

• to convey sensitive information• when you need privacy• when you’re angry

• Use emoticons• Use all capitals• Use excessive exclamation points

E-mail Design

• Salutation• Informative or complimentary opening

(sentence or paragraph)• Explanation of purpose• Positive or complimentary closing (sentence or

paragraph)• Complimentary close• Name• Signature block

Opening

“ This e-mail explains the five-step process you need to install the new software program.”

“ Karen Jones suggested that I contact you about your interest in our services.”

“It was great to talk to you on the phone yesterday.”

Organized Writing

• Message up front

• Short paragraphs

• White space

• Headings

• Bullets, lists, charts

HATS : Document Design Guidelines

• Headings• Access – bullets, lists, graphs, etc.• Type• Space

Hello All,

I’m looking forward to working with you tomorrow.  We had a great session in July, and a productive phone conversation in August.  Now, we are going to really make this plan work! Based on what we agreed to in August, I’ve created a brief agenda for our meeting tomorrow. We should: Review the strategic plan developed in July, use consistent terminology, distinguish between short and long-term goals, be sure that there is clarity and buy-in among the leadership team, and answer any questions about how to carry out strategies. I’m looking forward to the year ahead.

All the best,Tess

Hello All,

I’m looking forward to working with you tomorrow.  We had a great session in July, and a productive phone conversation in August.  Now, we are going to really make this plan work! 

Based on what we agreed to in August, I’ve created a brief agenda for our meeting tomorrow.

First Meeting

• Review the strategic plan developed in July. • Use consistent terminology. • Distinguish between short and long-term goals.  • Be sure that there is clarity and buy-in among the leadership team.• Answer any questions about how to carry out strategies.

I’m looking forward to the year ahead.

All the best,Tess

Hello Team,

We want to thank the team that developed the new policy. It was a lot of work and this new policy should take care of a lot of the problems that we were having in the past. Please be sure to follow this new plan immediately. If you need personal time off, please contact your immediate supervisor. Vacation time, however, needs to go through Human Resources. If you need to take a sick day, you must contact your Department Manager.

Subject: New Policy for Reporting Time Off

Hello Team,

The chart below lists the proper contacts for reporting time off. This is a new policy developed to simplify the process. Please send any questions to me directly.

Reason for Time Off Who to Contact

Personal Immediate Supervisor

Vacation Human Resources

Sick Time Department Manager

Use the right tone

• Word choice • Use of Contractions Length of sentences• Active vs. Passive Voice• Personal vs. All-business• Positive vs. negative phrasing

A research team proceeded toward the apex of a natural geological protuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement of a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was unspecified. One member of the team precipitately descended, sustaining severe fractional damage to the upper cranium portion of the anatomical structure. Subsequently, the second member of the team performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the direction taken by the first team member.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water.

Word choice creates clarity!

Word choice sets the tone

Please report to my office immediately for an urgent discussion about the error in production today.

As soon as you have a chance, please drop by my office. I want to get your take on the problem in production today.

Hi Jim,

I know that you said that you’re sure the numbers for the quality assurance department are correct on the team report, but I don’t know how to account for the discrepancy. I’m sorry to keep bothering you about this, but I have to fill out my report and I don’t know what to do.Thanks,Linda

Hi Jim,

This discrepancy in regards to the reporting of hours in the accounting department must be addressed. Please call me as soon as possible to discuss this.

Linda

We do not have the system capacity to fulfill your order at this time.

We don’t have the system capacity to fulfill your order at this time.

We’ll be able to fulfill your order as soon as our system update is complete.

Emphasize Important Ideas

• Use short sentences to emphasize an idea.• Use compound sentences to subordinate an

idea.• Put important ideas at the beginning of a

paragraph to emphasize.• Put at end to subordinate.

• Emphasis: Smoking will no longer be permitted in the building. The committee on employee health and safety reached this decision after considering evidence from researchers and physicians on the dangers of second-hand smoke.

• Subordination: The committee on employee health and safety has finished considering evidence, and they have reached the decision that smoking will no longer be permitted in the building.

Hi Jim, In order to provide you with the most accurate reporting possible, we need reliable numbers for the hours reported by the quality assurance team. As you know, we’ve been trying to account for the discrepancy between the quality assurance team’s report of hours and the company report. Once we are able to do that, you’ll have our complete and accurate report.

I’d like to arrange a time to talk, either by phone or in person, to discuss this with you. Please let me know what times would be convenient for you within the next week.

My best,Linda

Formality

• Use longer words and more complex sentences to create a formal tone.

• Use shorter, more familiar words and simple sentences to create an informal tone.

Do you aspire to company assignment upon graduation that will position you favorably and enhance your chances for career success?

Are you looking for a job after graduation that will help you to get ahead in your field?

Please respond to this e-mail with a list of possible meeting times.

Let me know what days and times will work for you.

Our fee structure is included in the proposal.

I’ve listed our fees below.

Positive, Professional Tone

• State any “bad news” indirectly

• Emphasize what can be done

• Use positive words and phrases

Hi Amy,I value your contribution at the office, and understand how difficult it can be to balance work and family demands.Because of the nature of our work, it’s necessary that everyone start at 8:00. John Smith had the same issue recently and found a day care nearby that solved the problem. You might want to get in touch with him. If that doesn’t help, Mary also keeps of list of day care centers used by our employees.I hope this helps you find a day care that meets your needs.My best,Jim