TOTALLY FORGIVING OURSELVES

Talk 4

Youth conference Oct 2012

SUMMARY OF THE TALK

1) Definitions2) Why should I have to

forgive myself3) What accepting yourself

IS NOT4) What accepting yourself

IS

DEFINITION:

It is accepting God’s forgiveness of all my past sins and failures (after repentance, confession and Eucharist) completely

that I equally let myself off the hook for my past as God himself has done. It also means

that since I must forgive others totally , I must equally forgive myself totally. (And

the second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbour as yourself. Matt 22:39) . Also,

If I am not to judge or condemn others, it follows I should not judge or condemn myself

(after repentance, confession and Eucharist)

FALSE GUILT = PSEUDO-GUILT

It is a sense of shame in our hearts that God did not

put there. Freud , taught that pseudo-guilt is an unconscious need for self-punishment, self-torment or self sabotage

TRUE GUILT

Now I rejoice, not that you were made sorry, but that your

sorrow led to repentance. For you were made sorry in a godly manner, that you might suffer loss from us in nothing. 10 For

godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation,

not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces

death. 2 Cor 7:9,10

WHY WE SHOULD FORGIVE?

1) It is precisely what God wants us to do.And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 32 And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Eph 4:30-32

‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” Matt 19:19

2. SATAN DOES NOT WANT YOU TO FORGIVE YOURSELF

Now whom you forgive anything, I also forgive. For if indeed I have

forgiven anything, I have forgiven that one for your sakes in the presence

of Christ, 11 lest Satan should take advantage of us; for we are not

ignorant of his devices. 2 Cor 2:10,11

Our lack of total forgiveness is an open invitation for the devil to

move in

3. YOU WILL HAVE INNER PEACE AND FREEDOM FROM THE BONDAGE OF GUILT

Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the

Spirit of the Lord is, there is liber

ty

2 Cor 3:17

4. THE DEGREE TO WHICH YOU FORGIVE YOURSELF MAY DIRECTLY RELATES TO YOUR

USEFULNESS.

Now therefore, arise, go out and speak comfort to your servants. For I swear by

the LORD, if you do not go out, not one will stay with you this night. And that will be worse for you than all the evil that has befallen you from your youth

until now.” 8 Then the king arose and sat in the gate. And they told all the people,

saying, “There is the king, sitting in the gate.” So all the people came before the

king. For everyone of Israel had fled to his tent. 2 Sam 19:7,8

5. TOTALLY FORGIVING YOURSELF WILL HELP YOU LOVE PEOPLE MORE

‘Honor your father and your mother,’

and, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’”

Matt 19:19

6. PEOPLE WILL LIKE YOU MORE WHEN YOU HAVE FORGIVEN YOURSELF

A man who has friends must himself be friendly,

But there is a friend who sticks closer than a

brother. Prov. 18:24

7. IT WILL ENABLE YOU TO FULFIL ALL WHAT GOD HAS IN MIND FOR YOU AND THUS KEEP YOU FROM BEING

PARALYSED BY THE PAST

Peter Denies and wept ( Matt 26:69-75) Peter Preaching fearless and in confidence

(acts 2)

8. IT AFFECT YOUR PHYSICAL HEALTH

Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit that is

why we need to care about our temples

9. It affects our mental and emotional health

10. It affects our Spiritual state

WHAT ACCEPTING YOURSELF IS NOT

1) It does not mean accepting that you are a finished product as you are now.

2) It does not mean accepting your continued sinning.

3) It is not mean accepting your present spiritual progress as final

4) It is not mean accepting your present knowledge as final

5) It is not meanaccepting your present situation as final

WHAT ACCEPTING YOURSELF IS

1) Accepting your parents.2) Accepting the hard things you endured as

you grew up but also since.3) Accepting your calling4) Accepting your intellectual limitations5) Accepting the truth about your faults6) Accepting yourself with any illness or

disability.7) Accepting yourself in the light of the

mistakes you have made