Unprofessional Behaviour or Intimidation

8/8/2019 Unprofessional Behaviour or Intimidation

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UNPROFESSIONAL BEHAVIOUR OR INTIMIDATION:

RESPONDING WHEN COLLEAGUES CROSS THE LINE

By Dr. Barbara Lent

Associate Dean, Equity and Gender Issues, Schulich School of Medicine and Dentistry

General Guidelines For Dealing With Intimidation Or The Abuse Of Power

As early as possible, identify what might be going on regarding the use/abuseof power.

Document what was said and done whenever you feel uncomfortable. At theleast, it will help you clarify and deal with it. If the situation gets worse, your

notes will be important for any complaints you need to make. You will likely

minimize or forget what you dont record.

Seek support from peers as well as from in-house resources such as humanrights/equity advisors, Associate Dean of Equity, administrators or

counsellors. In most cases you can keep control over how the situation will behandled. Harassment and intimidation can affect your self-esteem,

performance and health. It may be discriminatory and illegal. It makes for a

poor environment for work and education.

Whenever possible, team up with others affected and with resource people todeal with the complaint. Increase your sense of control by finding out about

policies that can protect you.

Assume that you will need to deal with intimidation or harassment at somepoint in your career. Prepare yourself by reading about and practicing the

skills you will need. Find out from others what you need to strengthen:boundary setting, assertiveness, nonverbal skills, being clear, etc. Recognize that intimidation or harassment tends to get worse the longer it is

ignored. You need to take some responsibility for protecting yourself by

direct confrontation, or getting third party help, or even notifying the

organization after you are safely gone.

(adapted from materials originally developed by Dr. Dorothy Shaw, UBC)


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Strategies for Handling Intimidation or Harassment:

1. Initial responses for most situations admit to yourself that it is happening and that you may need to do something decide how much responsibility and risk you wish to take in this situation behave respectfully and professionally, even if the other person does not maintain eye contact and steady breathing briefly acknowledge the persons concern, frustration or other emotion identify the issue that the person is concerned about and verbally check out its

accuracy

2. How to limit intimidation and verbal abuse respond to the concern rather than to the bait (insults, tone of voice,

irrelevant items)

deflect persistent verbal abuse by responding in computer mode ie. a neutraland verifiable observation about the concern being expressed

o Most people find it difficult to be kept waiting.o Sometimes it is hard to ignore peoples appearance.o Patients sometimes want a more personal relationship with their

doctors.

o Student errors cause problems for others. defuse personal attacks by not playing the game, ie. use a boring baroque

response: I take after my own doctor in that respect; he was always late forappointments, etc.

if the behaviour does not improve, set your boundaries.o I can listen better if you lower your voiceo Lets stick to the issue.o Im uncomfortable hearing personal comments about other students.o Ill come back in 15 minutes when we can talk about this.

if your limits are ignored, clarify the situation. Are you willing to speak tome calmly/ drop the sexual references/ let me respond?, and be ready to acton the answer. Leave if you feel unsafe.

if there is a significant difference in power and/or a risk of retaliation, go to athird party for advice rather than confronting the harasser on your own. You

will have better protection once an advisor or administrator is involved andyou have documented the behaviour.

3. How to limit unprofessional or offensive behaviour Recognize that staying silent or ignoring the behaviour will be interpreted as

approval

address the behaviour rather than attacking the person, or you will escalate theproblem

confront the behaviour by naming it and stating your reactions to it,particularly if the person is willing to be influenced by you and does not really

intend to intimidate/ abuse

describe the impact on yourself, using I language rather than youstatements eg I feel very uncomfortable; I dont like your language; Ifeel awkward about your request


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focus the discussion back to the appropriate topic, using a broken recordapproach if needed: do you have any suggestions for my work; can I bringyou anything to help shorten the wait

make a clear statement of expectations, with examples: Id like you to treatme more professionally, specifically to keep your voice down and let me

complete my sentences set limits and act on them: please stop talking about sex; Im not staying any

longer

write a letter giving quotes or descriptions of the behaviour, describing howyou felt, and stating your expectations for future conversations. Keep a copy.

ask for tedious explanations of the meaning of offensive humour (as if youdidnt get it

take detailed notes of what was said; bring the notes to a third party whenseeking advice.

4. How to reinforce professional standards without risking everything make sure you are clear about your own values and standards clarify where your responsibility lies and who/what else should be involved set boundaries on your own professional behaviour by referring to your

values, or if necessary to external policies and standards: Im not willing;the College of Physicians and Surgeons does not allow Program

policy.

confront the other persons standards only if you have the power to influencethem.involve more senior authority in cases where you could be abused orretaliated against

combine diplomacy and confrontation, e.g. be soft on the person and hard onthe behaviour by pointing out the contradiction; Ive always admired your

standards, so it makes me wonder if you realize the awkward position inwhich your request places me, you say you care about me, yet you are

asking me to violate my professional standards

join others who are ready to ask for change or to consult a third party; avoidrelying on people who complain at length but will not act; negative gossip or

venting may come back to haunt you.

5. How to deal with retaliation and threats many threats arise out of frustration at not being heard - if you always listen

and check out the persons concerns, you may be able to shift to a more

constructive discussion most harassment policies forbid retaliation for making a complaint, but it will

be up to you to document problems and ask for protection

dont threaten a harasser: you may be dealing with an expert who has morepower than you and has already shown a willingness to abuse it

carefully document anything that seems like a threat or retaliation, followingup with details of the actions, the impact on your work, and your own efforts

to get safe

try to protect yourself before anything happens - speak to supportiveadministrators, transfer to a different supervisor, get a written statement of

how you will be evaluated


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when you are threatened (and feel physically safe), repeat the threat back tothe person and ask if that is what they meant, adding a tone of incredulity:youll improve my assignment only if I arrange a date with my classmate for

you? Youll refuse to complete our assignment for this committee unless I

recommend you for chair?

if you are blind-sided, buy time by saying that you need a while to considerthe matter; then go for advice to someone who is able to support you in aconfidential and knowledgeable way.

Resources for activelistening, self-talk, assertiveness and conflict resolution skills

Nicarthy G, Gottlieb N, & Coffman S. You Dont Have To Take It! Emotional Abuse at

Work Seal Press, 1993.

Stone, D. Difficult Conversations Guinness Publishing, 2000

Haden Elgin S. Gentle art of verbal self defense at work. Barnes and Noble Books 2003

Horn S. Tongue Fu! How to Deflect, Disarm and Defuse Any Verbal Conflict Griffin2001

Horn S. Take the Bully by the Horns: Stop Unethical, Uncooperative and Unpleasant

People from Running. VHPS Trade 2003

Namie G, Hughes M, Namie R. Bully Proof Yourself at Work: Personal Strategies to

Stop the Hurt from Harrassment The Work Doctor 1999

Documents

Unprofessional Behaviour or Intimidation