User-Centered Methods for (Academic) Writing · • Logical bridges: o The same idea of a topic is carried over from sentence to sentence o Successive sentences can be constructed

Jan-Mikael Rybicki

Writing Clinic

Language Centre

September 26, 2016

CS-E4900 User-Centered Methods for Product and Service Design

User-Centered Methods for (Academic) Writing

Bad design

• Who enjoys using badly designed un-user-friendly computer programs or systems?

• Who enjoys reading badly written and difficult to understand texts?

Figure 1. A user suffering from a headache caused by a poorly designed system.

User-Centered Methods for Writing

Product and service design

A system, product or service

A user

A designer or engineer

Writing

= a text (e.g. an essay, thesis, manual)

= a reader (e.g. professor, instructor)

= a writer (you)

Definitions of key concepts

Goals of Academic Writing

• Documenting research findings• Conveying scientific ideas to the research community (and others) content

Style (ideals)• Concise• Clear• Accurate

• Clearly expressed ideas are more likely to be understood as you intended (than messy ideas).

• Sometimes finding simple and clear expressions is very difficult.

Potential pitfalls

Organisation

Language fluency

Flow / cohesion

Grammatical accuracy

Correct register (style)

Research skillsPlanning Self-regulation

Readability

Agenda: User-Centered Writing

2. Organisation

3. Flow / cohesion

1. Planning

4. Readability

Beginning End


2. Organisation

3. Flow / cohesion

1. Planning

4. Readability

Overview of the Writing process

(3) Write drafts and have them reviewed

(2) Decide on your purpose, and devise an approach that will connectwith users and is approved by your

company/supervisor

(1) Examine, evaluate, and interpretyour material

Rework, replanand redraft for

final review and approval

The finisheddocument

(1) Work with the ideas

and information

(4) Evaluate and

revise the document

(3) Draft the document

(2) Plan the document

Figure 1 The Writing Process for Technical Documents (Source: Lannon, J. 2006. Technical Communication.)


2. Organisation

3. Flow / cohesion

1. Planning

4. Readability

Organisation of the text is often the most common problemTwo levels of text:

macro and micro

Macro: how the text is organised and connected at the paragraph and sentence level

Micro: how the text is organised and connected at the sentence and word level

Macro: Essay structure and paragraphs

Image source: http://scholarshape.com/blog/2013/8/28/the-paragraph-more-than-a-collection-of-sentences

A typical five-paragraph essay

Macro: Essay structure and paragraphs


A typical five-paragraph essay


2. Organisation

3. Flow/cohesion

1. Planning

4. Readability

A paragraph should (ideally) contain the following four elements1. Unity

2. Coherence

3. Topic sentences

4. Adequate development

A paragraph should (ideally) contain the following four elements1. Unity: each paragraph has one single focus

2. Coherence: ideas are easy to follow • Logical bridges: o The same idea of a topic is carried over from sentence to sentence

o Successive sentences can be constructed in parallel form

• Verbal bridges:o Key words can be repeated in several sentences

o Synonymous words or phrases can be repeated in several sentences

o Pronouns can refer to nouns in previous sentences

o Transition/ connecting words can be used to link ideas from different sentences

3. Topic sentences: at the beginning of each paragraph, signals what main idea is discussed in the paragraph AND creates cohesion with previous

4. Adequate development: topic should be fully and adequately discussed


General info

Specific

Specific

General

These elements should be repeated throughout the text

Agenda: General essay

2. Organisation

3. Flow/cohesion

1. Planning

4. Readability

Micro stuff that matters.

Four Key Readability Principles

1. Place given (familiar) before new information

2. Place topical information in the subject position

3. Place light (short) before heavy noun phrases

4. Use active verbs

• For independent study of these topics, go tohttp://sana.aalto.fi/awe/





4. Use active verbs


Given-New Principle

1. The Given-New Principlehttp://sana.aalto.fi/awe/cohesion/infostrux/given/index.html

http://sana.aalto.fi/awe/cohesion/infostrux/flow/index.html

http://sana.aalto.fi/awe/cohesion/infostrux/given/index.html

http://sana.aalto.fi/awe/cohesion/infostrux/flow/index.html

Information in a Sentence

Given New

Begin sentences with information (a noun phrase) that is familiar (given) to your reader.

Place any new information about the topic at the end of a sentence.

Finland is located in the northern Europe but is not a part of Scandinavia.

A water molecule consists of two hydrogen and one oxygen atoms.

Subject (noun phrase) Verb Object / Adverb

The speed of light (c) equals to 299 792 458 metres per second in a vacuum.

Finland is classified as a Nordic country.

Example Texts

Human-centered design (HCD) is a design and

management framework that develops solutions to

problems by involving the human perspective in all steps

of the problem-solving process. Human involvement

typically takes place in observing the problem within

context, brainstorming, conceptualizing, developing, and

implementing the solution. Human-centred design is an

approach to interactive systems development that aims to

make systems usable and useful by focusing on the users,

their needs and requirements, and by applying human

factors/ergonomics as well as usability knowledge and

techniques in design process. This approach enhances

effectiveness and efficiency, improves human well-being,

user satisfaction, accessibility and sustainability. At the

same time, it counteracts possible adverse effects of use

on human health, safety, and performance.

A design and management framework that develops

solutions to problems by involving the human perspective in

all steps of the problem-solving process is known as human-

centered design. Typically, observing the problem within


implementing the solution has human involvement. Such

interactive systems development that aims to make systems

usable and useful by focusing on the users, their needs and

requirements, and by applying human factors/ergonomics,

and usability knowledge and techniques, can be described as

human-centred design. It can be argued that it enhances


user satisfaction, accessibility and sustainability; and

counteracts possible adverse effects of use on human health,

safety and performance.

Which text is easier to read and understand?A B
















on human health, safety and performance.
















Which text is easier to read and understand? Why?A B

Adapted from: Wikipedia. “Human-centered design”. Available at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human-centered_design. Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human-centered_design
















Problems with text AA
















Problems with text AA

• Most sentences begin with a long and complex

subject.

• The main verb is often at the end of a sentence.

• Every sentence begins with unfamiliar

information

• The different idea of a topic is carried over from

sentence to sentence (no flow or cohesion).

• Pronoun “it” is used misleadingly.

Verdict: a very un-user-friendly text.

















User-friendliness of text BB

















• Most sentences begin with a short subject.

• The main verb is often at the beginning of a

sentence.

• Every sentence begins with familiar information

• The same idea of a topic is carried over from

sentence to sentence.

• Pronoun “it” is used clearly.

Verdict: a user-friendlier version of the text.

User-friendliness of text BB

The Given-New Principle

Three patterns of topical progression to organize given information

1. Constant Topic

2. Stepwise Topic

3. Hypertopic

Constant topic pattern

A tablet computer, commonly shortened to tablet, is a thin, flat mobile computer with a touchscreen display, which in 2016 is usually color, processing circuitry, and a rechargable battery in a single device. Tablets often come equipped with sensors, including digital cameras, a microphone, and an accelerometer. The touchscreen display in a tablet uses the recognition of finger or stylus gestures to replace the mouse, trackpad and keyboard used in laptops. They usually feature on-screen, pop-up virtual keyboards for typing and inputting commands. Tablets may include physical buttons for basic features such as speaker volume and power, and ports for plugging in network communications, headphones and battery charging. In 2016, many tablets have Wi-Fi capability built in so that users can connect to the Internet.

Adapted from Wikipedia article "Tablet computer": https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tablet_computer. Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0.

Constant topic pattern

A tablet computer, commonly shortened to tablet, is a thin, flat mobile computer with a touchscreen display, which in 2016 is usually color, processing circuitry, and a rechargable battery in a single device. Tablets often come equipped with sensors, including digital cameras, a microphone, and an accelerometer. The touchscreen display in a tablet uses the recognition of finger or stylus gestures to replace the mouse, trackpad and keyboard used in laptops. They usually feature on-screen, pop-up virtual keyboards for typing and inputting commands. Tablets may include physical buttons for basic features such as speaker volume and power, and ports for plugging in network communications, headphones and battery charging. In 2016, many tablets have Wi-Fi capability built in so that users can connect to the Internet.


Subjects are in bold, and main verbs are circled.In each sentence, the topic is constantly in the subject position.

Stepwise topic pattern

A key component among tablet computers is a touchscreen. The touchscreen allows the user to navigate easily and type with a virtual keyboard on the screen or press other icons on the screen to open apps or files.

Most tablets released since mid-2010 use a version of an ARM processor for longer battery life. The ARM Cortex processor family is powerful enough for tasks such as internet browsing, light production work and mobile games.

As with smartphones, most mobile tablet apps are supplied through online distribution. These distribution channels, known as "app stores", provide centralized catalogs of software and allow "one click" on-device software purchasing, installation and updates. The app store is often shared with smartphones that use the same operating system.


Stepwise topic pattern

A key component among tablet computers is a touchscreen. The touchscreen allows the user to navigate easily and type with a virtual keyboard on the screen or press other icons on the screen to open apps or files.

Most tablets released since mid-2010 use a version of an ARM processor for longer battery life. The ARM Cortex processor family is powerful enough for tasks such as internet browsing, light production work and mobile games.

As with smartphones, most mobile tablet apps are supplied through onlinedistribution. These distribution channels, known as "app stores", provide centralized catalogs of software and allow "one click" on-device software purchasing, installation and updates. The app store is often shared with smartphones that use the same operating system.


GivenNew

The new information becomes familiar in the next sentence and is then placed in the subject position.

1A corrective lens is a lens worn in front of the eye to treat optical

defects of the eye, such as myopia, hyperopia, astigmatism, and

presbyopia. 2Corrective lenses can be divided into three types:

glasses, contact lenses, and intraocular lenses. 3Glasses or

"spectacles" are worn on the face a short distance in front of the eyes. 4Contact lenses are worn directly on the surface of the eye. 5Intraocular lenses are surgically implanted most commonly after

cataract removal.

1A corrective lens is a lens worn in front of the eye to treat optical

defects of the eye, such as myopia, hyperopia, astigmatism, and

presbyopia. 2Corrective lenses can be divided into three types:

glasses, contact lenses, and intraocular lenses. 3Glasses or

"spectacles" are worn on the face a short distance in front of the eyes. 4Contact lenses are worn directly on the surface of the eye. 5Intraocular lenses are surgically implanted most commonly after

cataract removal.

(superordinate)

Three types

3glasses 4contact lenses 5intraocular lensesAdapted from Wikipedia article ”Corrective lens": https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corrective_lens. Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0.

Hypertopic pattern

The Light-before-Heavy Principlehttp://sana.aalto.fi/awe/cohesion/infostrux/light/index.html

Limits of Human Information Processing: 7±2 items

Let’s test how it works. Try to remember the following information.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

8 3 7 6 4 1 9 2 5 3

A B C D E F G H I J

X Q J F Y P Å C A L

Miller. (1956). The magical number seven, plus or minus two: some limits on our capacity for processing information. Psychological Review, 101(2), 343–352. http://doi.org/10.1037/h0043158

1.

2.

3.

4.

1.

2.

3.

4.


Let’s test how it works. Try to remember the following information.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

8 3 7 6 4 1 9 2 5 3

A B C D E F G H I J

X Q J F Y P Å C A L

Miller. (1956). The magical number seven, plus or minus two: some limits on our capacity for processing information. Psychological Review, 101(2), 343–352. http://doi.org/10.1037/h0043158

Sequencing informationand familiar patternssupport understanding.


1 2 3 4 5

Linux is an operating system.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Lecture hall T2 is located in the computer science building.

Counting: Reading individual words in a sentence.


Subject Verb Object

1 2 3

Linux is an operating system.

Subject Verb Object

1 2 3

Lecture hall T2 is located in the computer science building.

Reading chunks of text (fast reading).

Avoid long (top-heavy) subjects!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

A design and management framework that develops solutions to

10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20

problems by involving the human perspective in all steps of the

21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30

problem-solving process is known as human-centered design (HCD).

Subject = 23 words

This can easily exceed the workingmemory of an average person, creating unnecessary cognitive loadand reduces clarity.

Use light subjects (+ topical info)

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Human-centered design (HCD) is a design and management framework that develops solutions to problems by involving the human perspective in all steps of the problem-solving process.

Subject = 4 words

A familiar pattern for sentence definitions.

The main message is clear within first 10 words.

BETTER: Light Heavy

How about this sentence?

A systematic comparison of frequently utilized design and management frameworks that are used to develop solutions to problems by involving the user perspective in every phase of a problem-solving process in two Finnish technology companies is performed.

Where is the main verb?

Pseudo-scientific writing

A systematic comparison of frequently utilized design and management frameworks that are used to develop solutions to problems by involving the user perspective in every phase of a problem-solving process in Finnish technology companies is performed

Subject = 34 words

It is easy to construct impressive sounding abstractpseudo-sciency top-heavy sentences using passivevoice and generic verbs, such as perform orimplement.

However, they can be hard to read and sometimesimpossible to understand.

in this report.

Better option

This paper compares three frequently used design and management frameworks in Finnish technology companies: 1, 2, and 3.

Subject = 2 words

Organize information for readers.

Commas, subjects and counting

Processing and Counting

At the IEEE conference held last June in Honolulu, we

presented our design for an economical AM/FM receiver

that is both affordable for the average consumer and

profitable for the company.

Where to start counting?

Introductory Phrases:

Up to comma [,] processed as one unit

LIGHT HEAVY , LIGHT HEAVY

our design for an economical AM/FM receiver that is both affordable for

the average consumer and profitable for the company.

3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

At the IEEE conference held last June in Honolulu, we presented

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 1 2

VERBSUBJECT

BEST!

ACCEPTABLE (if subject not too long)

BAD!

VERBSUBJECT

VERBSUBJECT

WORST!!

VERBSUBJECT

Balancing Information Elements

Example Text

Hertzum, M. (2010) Images of usability. International Journal of Human-Computer Interaction, 26(6), pp. 567-600. ISSN: 1044-7318, doi:10.1080/10447311003781300.

Instructions(1) Does the author maintain given-new and light-before-heavy principles?(2) If yes, which patterns of topical progression are used?

Tip: Highlight subjects and circle the main verbs.

(1) Does the author maintain given-new and light-before-heavy principles?(2) If yes, which patterns of topical progression are used?Tip: Highlight subjects and circle the main verbs.

Hertzum, M. (2010) Images of usability. International Journal of Human-Computer Interaction, 26(6), pp. 567-600.

(1) Does the author maintain given-new and light-before-heavy principles?(2) If yes, which patterns of topical progression are used?Tip: Highlight subjects and circle the main verbs.


,

(1) Does the author maintain given-new and light-before-heavy principles?(2) Patterns of topical progression:


,

YES, mostly constant topic: usability.

The connector for example used to

jump to a new topic.





4. Use active verbs


Use of active verbshttp://sana.aalto.fi/awe/style/sentence/weakverbs/index.html

http://sana.aalto.fi/awe/style/sentence/nominal/index.html

http://sana.aalto.fi/awe/style/sentence/weakverbs/index.html

Find the main verbs in each sentence.

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Design_Factory. Retrieved 21.9.2016.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Design_Factory

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Design_Factory. Retrieved 21.9.2016

Weak verbs:is, are, has, have

An active verb

Find the main verbs in each sentence.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Design_Factory

Problems with overuse of weak verbs "to be", "there is" or "have"• Overuse of the weak verb "to be" forces the action to

become expressed as a noun phrase rather than as a verb

nominalizations

unnecessarily abstract and complicated sentences.

Difficult to understand sentences (multiple possible interpretations)

• Dull reading is … is ... is ... are ... is ... have ... is ...

• To correct these problems, use active verbs.

1. Avoid ’’there is…”

Put Action into the Verb

There are several important factors that must be considered in the design of a user-friendly interface for mobile phones.

Ø several important factors Ø must be considered in the design of a user-friendly interface for mobile phones.

Where is the action?

2. Avoid generic verbs


An analysis of the framework was performed using standard criteria.

The framework was analyzed using standard criteria.

Generic Verbs:

to perform, to do, to make, to achieve, to accomplish

The action is hiding in the noun

phrase!

The action moved from the noun phrase to the verb!

3. Avoid using ”to be” to hide action


The first developer of the JavaScript language was Netscape.

The JavaScript language was first developed by Netscape.

What is the action here?

Netscape developed the JavaScript language.

1. The result of a long service interruption time is the loss

of IP packets during the cell reselection procedure.

2. The most common use of holography is to display static

3-D pictures.

3. There is a wide range of disciplines contributing to

the developments in nanostructure science and

technology worldwide.

4. The predictions of flawed computer climate models

were that man-made global warming should have already

begun to affect our climate in 1950.

Exercise 3

The following sentences contain weak verbs.

How would you make the sentences clearer and more effective?

3. There is a wide range of disciplines that contributes to

the developments in nanostructure science and technology

worldwide.

1. The result of a long service interruption time is the loss

of IP packets during the cell reselection procedure.

2. The most common use of holography is to display static

3-D pictures.

3. There is a wide range of disciplines contributing to

the developments in nanostructure science and

technology worldwide.

4. The predictions of flawed computer climate models

were that man-made global warming should have already

begun to affect our climate in 1950.

Exercise 3

The following sentences contain weak verbs.

How would you make the sentences clearer and more effective?

3. There is a wide range of disciplines that contributes to

the developments in nanostructure science and technology

worldwide.

3. A wide range of disciplines contributes to developments

in nanostructure science and technology worldwide.

1. A long service interruption time results in the loss of IP

packets during the cell reselection procedure.

2. Holography is most commonly used to display static 3-D

pictures.

4. Flawed computer climate models predicted that man-

made global warming should have already begun to affect our

climate in 1950.

When are weak verbs OK to use?

• Definitions: Triangulation is an approach to data collection and analysis that … (Wilson 2006).

• Labeling / categorizing: Organizational usability is a major factor in the design of information technology (IT) and organizations (Hertzum 2010).

• With adjectives: It is important that …

• Be + to + infinitiveThe purpose of this survey is to identify usability problems in the systemdesign of ...

• This survey aims to identify … (no weak verb).

Quick check of own text

Look at your own text: Have you used ’weak’ verbs orstructures, such as

- verbs: forms of be, have, do, make…

- Structures: there is/are, it is/are

Or unnecessary nominalisation?

5 min to check and highlight them for later!

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