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Do Not JudgeVienna Presbyterian Church

The Rev. Dr. Glenda Simpkins HoffmanMatthew 7:1-12

March 14, 2016

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For two months now, we have been exploring Jesus’ greatest teaching in the Sermon on the Mount, and we have learned thus far that the good life is found in an ongoing, interactive relationship with the living God through Jesus Christ. It’s more than “outward conformity of behavior” or “doing the right thing.” Jesus is showing us what a really good person looks like and how we become one as we learn to live without anger, contempt, lust, adultery, anxiety, or the need to secure our sense of well-being or happiness by what we have, what we do, or what other people think of us. We really can experience the good life right here and right now and become a truly good person as we put our confidence in Jesus and follow his lead.

And by now, we may be feeling pretty good about our-selves and thinking we are really making some progress in our spiritual formation, but then we come to today’s passage and realize that if we would become like Christ and live in the power of the kingdom, we must abandon the deeply-rooted and pervasive human practice of judging others. Jesus has some very sound teaching for us to hear and to heed. Listen now for God’s relevant and practical word to you:

“Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. For with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of

your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.”

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I have to confess my struggle with judging. When Pete gave me this date to preach, I thought, “Really, I have to preach on daylight saving Sunday?” And then, when he told me the topic, I wondered, “Does he think I’m judgmental?” All kidding aside, the truth is I do know a lot about the subject. You might even say I’m an expert. I think I came out of the womb judging. I’m a twin—the second twin, mind you—so I’ve always had someone to compare and contrast myself to. Then there is my basic personality. I’m always thinking, analyzing, evaluating. There is a positive side to that, to be sure, but there is also a big downside—judging.

But lest you think this is only my problem, it’s important to recognize judging as a human problem. It’s global. Every war that has been fought and many other problems in the world are the result of groups of people judging other groups of people. As Americans, we are right now in the middle of an election cycle that is characterized by intense judging—not just dealing with differing political issues, but candidates judging each other with anger, contempt, and verbal desecration in a way that has never been done before. But let’s make it even more personal. Statistics show that 50 percent of marriages—even Christian marriages—end in divorce. This is an indication that these sacred relationships are filled with a lot of judging—even in those who haven’t gotten a divorce. Judging is a problem in most marriages. And it trickles down from parents to children.

C.S. Lewis remarks about parents who treat their children with “an incivility which, offered to any other young people, would simply have terminated the acquaintance. They are dogmatic on matters the children understand and the elders don’t, they impose ruthless interruptions, flat contradictions,

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ridicule of things the young take seriously, and make insulting references to their friends” (The Four Loves).

Dallas Willard proposes that the generation gap that exists in our society today is primarily due to the different generations judging each other in a way that simply didn’t exist a century ago (The Divine Conspiracy).

As a thoroughly middle-aged person, I have to remind myself as a parent and as a pastor of the wise words that Albus Dumbledore said to Harry Potter: “Youth cannot know how age thinks and feels, but old men [and women] are guilty, if they forget what it was to be young. And I seem to have forgotten, lately” (Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix).

Judging is a deeply human problem that I dare say every one of us is guilty of inflicting on another, and all of us have experienced the pain of someone inflicting it on us. So what is judging exactly? James Bryan Smith says, “Judging is making a negative evaluation of others without standing in solidarity with them.” It is different from assessing the behavior of others, which is a necessary part of life. We have to be wise and discerning, or life simply won’t work. But what is the difference between judging and assessing? It’s a matter of the heart—the heart of the person doing the assessing.

Dallas Willard has coined a phrase that speaks volumes. Condemnation engineering is the deadly way in which we try to manage or control those closest to

us by condemning them and by forcing upon them our “wonderful solutions.” This definition makes clear the motivation of the heart. People who judge believe they are

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right and have a deep desire to control and even manipulate others to their point of view.i

So let’s look at Jesus’ words to us. “Do not judge, so that you may not be judged.  For with the judgment you make you will be judged.”  What does Jesus mean? Let’s be clear: Jesus is not referring to the possibility of being judged by God or having his grace taken away. Rather, Jesus is using the image of a measuring cup: “the measure you give will be the measure you get.” It’s really very sound advice: Don’t judge others unless you are prepared to live under that arrangement yourself. If we judge someone, that person is likely to turn around and judge us back.

Then Jesus makes a humorous observation about judging and the hypocrisy that we display when we judge others. Imagine a person with a log lodged in his eye offering to help a man to dislodge a tiny speck of sawdust in his eye. Jesus’ hearers must have laughed out loud at the absurdity of such an idea.

Most of the time, people interpret the log to mean their own sinfulness, as if Jesus is saying, “Who are you to judge? You are more of a sinner than your neighbor.” However, the log is not our sinfulness but rather the act of judging. Judging others makes it impossible to help them. Even if the intention is good, the method is all wrong. They will defend themselves and react strongly out of a position of protection. We have to get rid of the log in our eye and stop judging because it blinds us from seeing a better way to actually help someone with a problem.

We not only have to get the log out of our eye, we also need to give up trying to force our “wonderful solutions” on people. Jesus brings his

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point home with a great illustration: “Do not give what is holy to dogs; and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under foot and turn and maul you.”

Some commentaries say this is a wise saying of Jesus, but that it is unrelated to what we have just read. I disagree. I think Jesus is continuing the theme of judging. But I don’t think he is suggesting that certain people are to be viewed as pigs or dogs who are not worthy of our brilliance or wisdom. Nor is he saying that we should not give good things and do good deeds to people who might reject or misuse them. In fact, his teaching is precisely the opposite. We are to be like the Father in the heavens, “who is kind to the unthankful and the evil” (Luke 6:35).

The problem with pearls for pigs is not that the pigs are unworthy. The issue is not about worthiness; it’s about helpfulness. Casting pearls before swine is not helpful because pigs do not appreciate fine jewelry. If a farmer gave pigs pearls for several days in a row, they would go hungry and attack the farmer. They can’t eat pearls, but they can eat people. The same is true for dogs; they can’t eat the Bible or a crucifix, but they can eat you.

Here’s the principle: Just as pigs can’t digest pearls, people can’t digest being judged or condemned. It does not nourish them or help them or meet their need. Even if our judgement is sound, the approach is all wrong. Like pigs with pearls, people will go on the offensive because being judged feels threatening and condescending, and no one likes or responds to it well. Condemnation engineering fails and harms human relationships.

So if judging is so harmful and unhelpful, why do we do it? There are two main reasons: to fix

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people or to make us feel better about ourselves. This reveals a distorted heart. “I’m right and I want to control and change you to meet my expectations” or “I look down at you in order to feel good about myself.”

Judging fails for many reasons, but I want to talk about four of them. First, judgement fails because it doesn’t come across as loving. Remember that the Sermon on the Mount is all about living from the inside out. It’s a matter of the heart. Judgement doesn’t flow from the heart. A judging person lacks love, compassion, gentleness, kindness, understanding, and empathy and usually fails to come alongside as an advocate or helper. Mother Theresa famously said, “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” This is why people don’t tolerate judgment. They instinctively know that they are not being loved.

Second, judgement fails because it doesn’t allow the person to own the need for change. The first step toward change is always awareness or recognition that there is a problem. When we judge others, we bypass this all-important step and force them to recognize the errors of their ways, making them feel attacked and causing them to react defensively. They often strike back. I could give countless examples from my personal experience of how my “helpful” attempts to fix others have proved to be counterproductive. I have a time limit in this sermon, so I can’t give them all now, but I am willing to share at another time, if you are interested. It’s important to understand that we do not have the power to fix or change people. We have to give respect and freedom to people and allow them to make their own choices for healing and transformation.

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Third, judgement fails because it doesn’t offer help toward change. People we judge live as they do for many reasons. All of us are at the mercy of many dominant narratives that are convincing us to believe what we believe, do what we do, live as we live. Condemnation engineering fails because it doesn’t factor in that a key ingredient for change is knowing how to change.

Change does not come by waving some magical wand. Change involves participating with God as He works in and through us. This involves adopting new narratives, practices, relationships, and experiences that help us to participate with God and allow Him to do in and through and for us what He alone can do. The process of change is lengthy and challenging and will usually involve the help of others who genuinely love and care about us.

Finally, our judgement may be wrong. The story is told of Charles and Susannah Spurgeon who sold eggs to people in their congregation. Both the congregation and family members thought they were greedy and should have given the eggs away. The Spurgeons accepted the criticism without defending themselves. After their death it was learned that the profit went to support two elderly widows. They had not revealed this because of the Matthew 6:3 principle: “When you give to the needy, do not let your right hand know what the left hand is doing.”

It’s a great illustration and points out that we are not always right. We do not know everything. We do not know all the reasons behind circumstances and why people do what they do.

Only God is aware of all of the facts. So we need to engage in the practice of humility, refusing to judge others. Philo of

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Alexandria is quoted as saying, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.”

If Jesus says, “Do not judge,” because it simply is not helpful, then what is the right way to help someone? Jesus gives us the answer in the next part of the passage: “Ask, and it will be given you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.  Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for bread, will give a stone? Or if the child asks for a fish, will give a snake?  If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”

Again, many people read this section as unrelated to what was before it as if Jesus switched topics from judgement to prayer. But he is still addressing the issue of helping others. Once we have taken the log out of our eye and stopped judging and stopped forcing our wonderful ideas on people, the best way to help another is to ask, seek and knock.

This is certainly related to prayer because when we begin to pray, we have already taken the focus off of ourselves as we invite God into the situation. This serves as a good heart check. In prayer, we can practice self-examination and confession. Are we focused on our-selves and our circumstances or on being right? Are we clinging to control by trying to fix the other person or make ourselves feel better? Or are we focused on God and a desire to love Him and to love our neighbor? Do we genuinely want to help others in the way that is wanted or needed? It’s an amazing thing that when we pray, we begin to feel more

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compassion and less criticism. We have the wisdom of God available to us to accurately assess the situation. Like a good parent gives what is wanted and needed to a child, we can trust God will do the same for us.

Please understand, this passage doesn’t only refer to prayer. Jesus also shows us the way we can approach others so that we are offering genuine help. After we have prayed for some time and know our hearts are in the right place, we can approach the person and ask if they want our help or our perspective. We have to be prepared and ready to accept that the answer may be no.

Remember we cannot change people. Each has to choose. The door knob for each person’s heart is on the inside. God, the rightful judge of the universe, does not force Himself on others or make people believe or act as He would desire. He gives them the freedom to choose. We are to imitate God by not forcing ourselves or our views on other people or manipulating them into doing what we want them to do. We give others the freedom to say yes or no.

Nevertheless, we are encouraged to ask and to keep asking. We are encouraged to communicate our desire to stand with the other person by not giving up or losing hope. These are present tense imperatives: We are to keep asking, keep seeking, and keep knocking with respect and without manipulation. In this way, we imitate God whose steadfast love endures forever. God is longsuffering and always faithful, and He calls us to imitate Him in our commitment and persistence in prayer and in the way we relate to others.

Finally, in verse 12 we reach the grand finale of Jesus’ discussion on condemnation engineering—The Golden Rule: “In everything do to

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others as you would have them do to you; for this is the law and the prophets.”

Again, this is not a separate saying but relates to judging. When you are considering how to deal with someone and facing the great human temptation to judge, put yourself in the other’s shoes and think about how you would like to be dealt with if the roles were reversed. If we followed this rule, “We would help them, pray for them, ask to help them and stand with them, but we would never judge them.”

I said at the beginning of this sermon that I’m an expert in judging, and God has been using this passage in my life to reveal my sin and the ways I need to change. I’m not the judge I used to be. Thank God. But I’m still more of one than I want to be. I don’t want to be known for being judging or even a good critical thinker; I want to be known for being loving. And I believe God wants that, too. And I believe He can change my heart. It’s who He is; it’s what He does.

I’m seeking ways to participate with God in His work in my life. I have been meditating on and praying through the Sermon on the Mount, which is really helping me. I participate in a Growing Your Soul group, in which we talk about our besetting sin patterns. I receive renewing prayer regularly to identify the false beliefs that are driving negative attitudes and behaviors. I talk regularly with a spiritual director and confess my sin and am blessed by her insight, wisdom, and prayers. And I’m looking for the signs that I am changing in my marriage, family life, work relationships. I encourage you to do the same: What are the practices, relationships and experiences that will help you to partner with God? What will be the signs in your life and relationships that God is changing you?

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Jesus is inviting us to a new posture. Jesus is Emmanuel, “the God who is with us.” He descended to come alongside and love us as we needed, and His Spirit is still with us as our advocate doing what is helpful. He invites us to do the same. Do not judge, because it’s not helpful. Rather, live from the heart and follow His new commandment: “Love one another as I have loved you.”

i I am indebted to Dallas Willard (The Divine Conspiracy) and James Bryant Smith (The Good and Beautiful Life: Putting on the Character of Christ) as I have relied heavily on their brilliant expositions of this passage for my sermon.