WHAT’S SO GREAT ABOUT THE

ATTACHMENT THEORY?

What are the different parenting theories?

There are many different parenting theories, the three most popular parenting theories include the following:

1. Social learning theory2. Parenting styles theory3. Attachment theory

Social Learning TheoryA child’s real life experiences and exposures directly or indirectly shape a child’s behavior.

If a child experiences something positive from a specific behavior they will likely to it again.

If a child experiences something negative, they will likely not do it again.

By reacting in this manner children will learn strategies on how to handle their emotions, resolve disputes and engage with others from the way their reactions were responded to.

Social Learning Theory Cont. Stacey Rogers, a psychologist said the following concerning this model: “Given its historical emphasis on altering negative, aggressive behavior in children, models of parenting based on social learning theory have tended to emphasize parental conflict, coercion and consistent discipline. But more theorists have incorporated positive dimensions of parenting as a way of promoting child positive behavior and affect, improving the pleasurable nature of parents’ and children’s’ interactions with one another. (Rogers1998)

Rogers, Stacey. "Satisfaction with Parenting: The Role of Marital Happiness, Family Structure, and Parents' Gender " Journal of Marriage and Family 60.2 (1998): 293-308.

Parenting Style TheoriesAccording to this theory, parents are placed in different parenting categories due to reactions they show toward their children. The three groups include:

AuthoritarianPermissiveAuthoritative

Authoritative Parenting Style

CHARACTERISTICS

• Healthy interactions between the parent and child

• Appropriate responses to need and desire

• Consequences are clear and will be enforced if the child does not comply

• Supportive environment with mutual understanding

Permissive Parenting Style

CHARACTERISTICS

• Giving a child a lot of freedom

• Bribery, gifts and other motivators for child’s obedience

• A lack of conflict

• No sense of discipline or connectedness.

Authoritarian Parenting Style

CHARACTERISTICS

• Promotes fear in the child’s heart

• Requires order to be kept at all times

• Causes the child to think that he must please the parent in order to get a reward

• Results in a lack of inner discipline but obedience to rote authority.

The Attachment TheoryThere are four key components of the attachment theory:

1. Safe Haven – This is when the child feels threatened or afraid he has a place of refuge where he can return to for comfort and soothing.

2. Secure Base – This requires that the caregiver provides a secure and dependable base for the child to explore the world.

3. Proximity Maintenance – The child strives to stay near the caregiver thus keeping the child safe.

4. Separation Distress- When separated from the caregiver the child will show signs of distress.

Attachment theory and Winnie-the-Pooh

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind, “Pooh?, he whispered.“Yes, Piglet?”“Nothing,” said Piglet, taking Pooh’s paw. “I just wanted to be sure of you.”(Sarner 2012)

This concept of the child truly knowing and feeling secure of the person taking care of them is the theme of attachment theory. The child having someone that they are one hundred percent sure of and are able to rely upon.

Why Attachment Theory?“Children’s attachments are based on how they expect their caregivers to respond when the children show distress. Children internalize attachment experiences in the form of ‘mental models’ or ‘mental images’ of caregivers and themselves. Children with secure attachments build mental models of a secure self, caring parents and a kind world. In contrast, children with insecure or disorganized attachments come to see caregivers and the world as dangerous and unpredictable, and themselves as bad or unworthy of love and care. The mental models that children construct affect their later relationships, which is why these models are sometimes referred to as attachment working models.”(O’Connor 2007)O'Connor, Thomas. "Parenting and Outcomes for Children." Joseph Rowntree Foundation (2007): 1-30.

How Can You Apply the Attachment Theory?

• Commitment- This requires that the parents are absolutely committed to the task of sharing the child’s journey.

• Personal Support – It is vital that an attachment to the child is not built at the expense of neglecting or even losing the close, confidence, intimate attachments that nourish the resilience of carers themselves.

• Professional Supervision – Parents must establish links with those that are in contact with their childrenso that they can establish a support group for their children.

• Working with others to build an environment that promotes secure attachment – in this kind of environment all those that are close to your children maintain an atmosphere or constant and consistent love and safety.

Works Cited• Baumrind, Diana. "Child-Care Practices." Genetic Psychology

Monographs 75 (1967): 43-88.

• O'Connor, Thomas. "Parenting and Outcomes for Children." Joseph Rowntree Foundation (2007): 1-30.

• Oyserman, Daphna. "Positive Parenting among African American Mothers with a Serious Mental Illness." Journal of Marriage and Family 64.1 (2002): 65-77.

• Rogers, Stacey. "Satisfaction with Parenting: The Role of Marital Happiness, Family Structure, and Parents' Gender " Journal of Marriage and Family 60.2 (1998): 293-308.

• Onken, Joellen. Interview. 10/15/2012

• Sarner, Thomas. Interview. 10/15/2012