What is Success?
Definition– To prosper– To thrive– To achieve
“To come through with flying colors.”“To earn one’s wings.”
What is Success for an Elementary School Age Child?
A successful child- is eager to try new things- appears happy and content- demonstrates positive self-esteem- enjoys friendships- recognizes his/her achievements- is interested in learning
PARENTS
P = Physical CareA = Academic PursuitsR = ResiliencyE = EsteemN = Nurture T = Time OutS = Social Skills
P = Physical Care
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Basic Needs
SELF-ACTUALIZATION
SELF-ESTEEM
BELONGING & LOVE
SAFETY
PHYSICAL
P = PHYSICAL CARE
“A family is a safe island.”“Inner security is born at home.”
Dr. M. Scott Peck
- Sleep- Nutrition- Exercise- Limits- Balance
A = ACADEMIC PURSUITS
Successful Children Enjoy Learning.
- Create a study environment- Provide materials- Emphasize the importance of learning- School involvement- Limit TV and other electronics- Focus on strengths - praise effort- Set high expectations
R = RESILIENCY
“Flexibility is the hallmark of a survivor personality.” Al Siebert
- Coping Skills & Stress- Problems are temporary, specific, &
impersonal- Develop workable plans- OPTIMISM
E = ESTEEM: Basic Worth
“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves.”
Thomas Merton
Basic Worth affects:- how a child feels about himself- how a child views the world- the choices that a child
makes in life
E = ESTEEM: Basic Worth
• Parents can help raise their child’s sense of self-worth by:
-The generous use of positive feedback- Be specific- Be sincere- Go public!
-Listen and communicate- Be attentive- Be respectful
E = ESTEEM: Competence
Successful children have an “I can do”Attitude!
Competence is effective when it has expectations that are:
- Reasonable- Age Appropriate
N = NURTURE
Children who are successful in school have parents who nurture them.
- Establish Family Traditions- Dinner time = Conversations- New Experiences- Family Values and Beliefs
T = TIME OUT
Discipline and Punishment
- Discipline is not punishment.- Punishment is what we do to control our
children.- Discipline is how we teach our children to
control themselves.
T = TIME OUT
Effective Discipline- Focuses on the Behavior- Age Appropriate
Behaviors = Consequences
Consequences:- Clear- Respectful- Firm - Consistent- Reasonable
S = SOCIAL SKILLS
“Children with good social and problem solving skills make new friends. They are comfortable in new situations.” Martin Seligman
Social Competence is necessary for success in today’s world.
S = SOCIAL SKILLS
Social Competence means developing Interpersonal Skills
- Skill of Initiating- Skill of Assertiveness- Skill of Listening- Skill of Cooperating- Skill of Negotiating
S = SOCIAL SKILLS
Interpersonal Skills
- Initiating: Greeting others
- Assertiveness: “I- messages”
Passive Assertive Aggressive
MeOthers
MeOthers
Me
Others
S = SOCIAL SKILLS
Interpersonal Skills (con’t)
- Listening: Attentiveness
- Cooperating: Sharing, CooperationCooperation vs. Competition
- Negotiating: Win/Win, Forgiveness
CONCLUSION
“Nothing will help children succeed in schools more than parents who provide a safe and loving environment and take care of their children’s physical and emotional needs.” Staff writer from Barrow Journal
RESOURCES
www.practicalhelpforparents.com www.overindulgenceinf.com www.parentsoup.com www.parenting.com www.aboutourkids.org