Leaving Well

What you and your family are about to experience can be one of the most exciting

times, but it also can be one of the most difficult.

One thing to know for certain, is that you will be missed around YIS. The other thing is that people here are glad to have had a

chance to get to know you.

~ A. ClarkSchool Counselor

Yokohama International SchoolPhoto: Dice K Goto

Getting in touch...

The purpose of this presentation is for you to get in touch with what this move means so that you experience a positive change and so that you can

“Leave Well”.

The things that you think about here are to help you remember those special times in Yokohama and also to help you as you transition into your

new school and home.

Reflecting

Over the course of this presentation you will be asked a series of questions.

You may find it helpful to write down your answers or just think quietly and reflect.

Photo: G. Unno

As you probably already know, saying goodbye can be a difficult thing to do. You may find it especially hard to say goodbye to the friends and teachers you have come to know while at YIS.

It will also be hard on those you leave behind as no one likes to say goodbye.

Things that won’t change

The experiences you have had here won’t change.

Your time here has played a role in who you are and who you will become.

You will always have this community and these experiences to fall back on for support.

Photo: Dice K Goto

Write your responses down…Again writing your thoughts down as you

go through this will give you something to look back on when you want to remember your friends, teachers and school.

Remember that your life is taking an exciting new direction and that amazing possibilities will open up over the next weeks and months.

Transition

One of the consistent patterns of transition that many go through is:

1) a move from a place of stability (like you have at YIS)

2) through some disruption 3) back to stability again in your new place.

1 3

2

Some other factors

• What people sometimes don’t expect is that there are many emotions that come up during these times.

• Initially it might be exciting to think of going someplace new.

• Often, however, that leads to some sadness as the reality of leaving sinks in.

Ups and downs

• When you arrive at the new place, it can be really exciting again. It doesn’t always stay that way because often there comes an in-between period when the “newness” has faded but you haven’t quite fully settled in yet.

• This is very common so don’t worry if you experience highs and lows as you move forward.

Let’s look at your unique journey…

How did you find out that you are leaving YIS?

What are the reasons you are leaving YIS?

How do you feel about moving?

Photo: Ken Funakoshi

How did you tell your friends about leaving YIS?

What were your friends’ reactions?

How did you feel about telling your friends?

Telling Your Friends

Troubles with Friends

It is a lot easier to say goodbye to people if you aren’t getting along. As a result, sometimes right before leaving conflicts and issues with friends come up.

If that is happening for you, do you best to resolve those conflicts. You may think that you won’t need these friends again, but actually you might. Remember those lows mentioned just a minute ago? It will be great to have someone you know well to connect with for support after you arrive at your new place.

What are some of the:

o people and places you will miss?

o Important goodbyes you must be sure say?

o things that you won’t miss?

Arriving at a New Place

What are some of the:

o facts you know about the new place?

o things you are looking forward to?

o details you want to get sorted out that you don’t yet have answers to.

Keeping in Touch

Who are some of the people you want to make sure you stay in contact with from YIS?

What will be the best way to communicate with each one of those people? (Have a plan so you can use it to remain close.)

Leaving Well with a RAFT Checklist

Resolve conflicts with others

Affirm Relationships that you’ve had here.

Say Farewell to people, places, possessions.

Think about your next destination by gathering

information and planning ahead.

Adapted from Pollock, D., (1990) The Transition Model, Albany NY: Interaction Inc.

Best Wishes

Thanks for taking the time to look this over. I hope some of the suggestions are useful to you as you move ahead. In addition to all the other people you know here, please keep in touch with me. I’d love to hear from you and learn of all the things you’re doing. Email or Facebook both work great for me. ~ A. Clark

clarka@yis.ac.jp