My oh my, my oh my…Ch. 22: Revising for Sentence Variety

What is sentence variety??

It is the different ways you begin, put together, and structure sentences to help them flow and transition better.

It spices things up by: Combining long and short sentences

Using questions, commands, and exclamations

Beginning with adverbs or prepositional phrases

Joining ideas with compound predicates, -ing modifiers, past participial modifiers, appositives, and relative clauses

Helping to avoid misplaced or confusing modifiers

It helps writers use each sentence/paragraph effectively.

Combining long and short sentences…

If sentences are too short, they create a choppy feel in the paper. Ex. I walked to school. It was nice. I am happy. I made it on

time.

If sentence are too long, they can create a heavy, drawn out feeling in the paper. Ex: I walked to school because its only five minutes from my

house and because I like to walk. Also, it is a great source of exercise because it keeps me in shape and healthy as well as makes me happy.

So…

Mixing long and short sentences together: Will help to transition your sentences and paragraphs

smoothly.

Will help your sentences be engaging.

Ex: I walk to school everyday because I live only five minutes from it, and walking relaxes me. It is really nice. Also, walking is a great source of exercise. Plus, I love it.

Statements…

Statements—declaratives—are the most commonly used in sentences. End with a period

Ex: The woman was wearing a satin, full length dress.

Using a question, a command, or an exclamation… Can draw attention to specific areas of the paper,

making important information stand out.

Shows the points you are going to prove/answer

Gives added emphasis to points and important information.

Provides direction to the readers

Should only be used when they are beneficial and help to influence and to strengthen the main topic.

Questions…

Are also referred to as rhetorical—you are not looking for the readers to answer the question but are showing them what you are about to answer in the paper.

Ex: How can one stop hunger in the world?

So, what is to be done?

Use of questions in papers is dependent on the professor.

Cannot be carelessly thrown about but must be used effectively.

Commands…

Are also referred to as imperatives—you are telling the reader to DO something and are giving them direction.

Ex: Action should be taken.

Ex: Don’t pretend it isn’t happening.

Speak from the heart.

Are used frequently in papers.

Need to be used purposefully.

Exclamations…

Are also referred to as emphasis—you are trying to express strong emotions toward the topic/point.

Ex: Car accidents are running rampant!

Ex: Health issues are destroying the world!

Ex: People must take a stand!

Should be used sparingly and only to draw attention to an important point.

Beginning with an adverb… Can help transition sentences.

Ex: The woman hurried to answer the door. Anxiously, she invited the lawyer inside.

Helps to not separate subject and verb. Some subjects and verbs should stay connect

Ex awkward: I excitedly ran to town.

Ex fluid: Excitedly, I ran to town.

Helps to not split infinitives

Infinitive: to place

Split infinitive: to anxiously place

Correct: to place anxiously

Exception: there are some sentences the flow better as a split infinitive; for example, to boldly go where no man has gone before.

Beginning with a prepositional phrase..

Can create a setting for the subject.

Creates a dependent clause, so it must follow the D,I sentence structure. Remember: A prepositional phrase contains a preposition

and an object

Ex: To me

Ex: At the moment

Ex: Toward the beach

Sentence ex: At the pool, the woman saw her neighbor.

However…

Prepositional phrases are not always movable. Moveable ex:

With a skip, the girl greeted her father.

The girl greeting her father with a skip.

Maintains the same meaning

Unmovable ex:

Joelle bought a bottle of white wine for the dinner.

Of white wine for the dinner, Joelle bought a bottle.

Doesn’t make sense and/ or changes original meaning.

Joining sentences with a compound predicate… Is when you are joining a sentence together by having

the verbs share the SAME subject.

Compound predicate: two verbs sharing one subject.

Ex:

Two different sentences: Mary ran to the fence. Mary jumped over the fence.

One sentence joined with compound predicate: Mary ran to and jumped over the fence.

Must be parallel

“and” is linking the two verbs to one subject…not a conjunction because neither part of the sentence is complete.

Can help…

Avoid short, choppy sentences.

An example of two short sentences: He serves elaborate meals. He never uses a recipe.

An example of joining sentences with a compound predicate: He serves elaborate meals and never uses a recipe.

Differ from joining two complete sentences because the two parts SHARE ONE subject.

Trick to knowing the difference...

Is to look for the subjects Ex: The man went to the office and prepared for the

presentation.

Two verbs connected to ONE subject

Compound predicate

Ex: The man went to the office, and he prepared for the presentation.

One separate subject for each verb

Two complete sentences

Must have comma and conjunction (or another punctuation form for two complete independent sentences)

Joining with an –ing modifier… Can help you join two sentences (occasionally)

Follows the D, I structure

Can indicate two actions occurring at the same time.

Two sentences ex: He peered through the microscope. He discovered a squiggly creature.

Joining with an –ing modifier ex: Peering through the microscope, he discovered a squiggly creature.

The main idea should be modified, not the modifying clause Correct Ex: Peering through the microscope, he discovered a

squiggly creature.

Incorrect Ex: Discovering a squiggly creature, he peered through the microscope.

Watch out for misplaced modifiers…

Misplaced modifiers can cause confusion to the readers.

Misplaced Modifier: He discovered a squiggly creature peering through the microscope.

Who was peering? The man or the squiggly creature??

Correct Modifier: Peering through the microscope, he discovered a squiggly creature.

Modifies the man, who is the main subject.

Joining with past participle modifiers… Can show what lead to an action.

Takes sentences that use the To Be verb and a past participle, and changes them into a past participle modifier.

To Be verb + Past Participle ex: Judith is trapped in a dead-end job. So, she decided to enroll at the local community college.

Past Participle Modifier ex: Trapped at a dead-end job, Judith decided to enroll at the local community college.

Follows the D, I structure

Watch out for Misplaced Modifiers! Make sure you are modifier the subject.

Misplaced, confusing, dangling modifier… Can cause your readers to have trouble understanding the

sentence and what is being modified.

Misplaced: Perching on the scarecrow in the cornfield, the farmer saw a large crow.

Who was perching? The famer or the crow?

Reword: The farmer saw a large crow perching on a scarecrow in the cornfield.

Confusing: A homeless teenager, the nun helped the girl find a place to live.

Who was a homeless teenager? The nun or the girl?

Reword: The nun helped the girl, a homeless teenager, find a place to live.

Dangling (does not refer to anything): Tired and proud, the website was completed at midnight.

Who was tired and proud? There is no subject that fits the modifier.

Reword : Tired and proud, the business man completed the website at midnight.

Joining with an appositive…

Can link information about a subject within a sentence. A word or group of words that renames or describes the

noun or pronoun.

Appositives can come before or after the noun or pronoun it renames.

Two separate sentences ex: Carlos is a native of Argentina. Carlos is new to wrestling.

Joining before: A native of Argentina, Carlos is new to wrestling.

Joining after: Carlos, a native of Argentina, is new to wrestling.

Commas set off appositive information and signal that it can be removed.

Joining with relative clauses…

Helps to describe the noun or pronoun.

Helps you to join two shorter sentences into a longer, completer idea.

Uses who, which, or that

Two complete sentences ex: Jack recently won a scholarship from the Arts Council. He makes wire sculpture.

Joining with a relative clause ex: Jack, who makes wire sculpture, recently won a scholarship from the Arts Council.

Main clause is stressed and the minor clause is turned into a relative clause.

A nonrestrictive relative clause…

Is when the added information has no impact or influence on the meaning of the sentence.

Ex: The little girl, who is sitting on that chair, is my daughter.

Information between the commas can be removed.

A restrictive relative clause…

Is when the added information is vital to the meaning of the sentence and cannot be removed.

Ex: People who chew with their mouths open should be smacked.

If you were to remove the relative clause you would get: People should be smacked.

The meaning of the sentence would change if the relative clause was to be taken out.