Children are a Blessing in our Marriages

CHILDREN IN MARRIAGE ARE A

BLESSING

Children come in our lives for a moment. They are indeed a blessing as we see them grow and mature.

Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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We have a very big responsibility in bringing up our kids. They can become a blessing or they can make your life hell on earth. With this blessing, there are responsibilities that are so crucial to both you and the children.


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Yes we can talk of marriage in all areas but we need to stop and ponder about the fruit of our marriage. If children do come, we have to prepare them physically, spiritually, socially and emotionally to face challenges in life.


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Our children are a blessing. They are one of our greatest joys and greatest challenges. God’s word has much to say concerning our children because they are considered precious and a blessing from God.


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God’s word tells us in Psalm 127:3-4, “3 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. 4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth.”


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God’s wisdom concerning the raising of children has stood the test of time. In Proverbs 22:6 it says, “6 Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” This simple yet profound verse tells us that it is the God given responsibility of all parents to set out adequate guidelines that will help children to know the right way while they are growing up.


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Proverbs 29:15 tells us, “...but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.” To understand God’s ways concerning the raising of children, you must understand this first principle and take it to heart. Children will not do well left to themselves. Children left to themselves will bring shame to you. Children must be trained.


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Three areas are absolutely essential as guidelines for a child to be trained.

1. Teach a child to honor authority, to obey and follow instructions.

2. Teach a child to reject rebellion, stubbornness, and disobedience.

3. Practice consistent discipline and correction. Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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1. Children are to honor authority, obey and follow instructions.

These three things are needed in a child’s life. If left undone they will suffer needlessly. Obviously a child will not agree or see the need for these areas in their life, but all are essential.


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For your child’s sake, they must learn to love instruction and heed reproof. It is with our new nature in Christ that we can see authority as a blessing and a protection rather than a hindrance to our own way. We find this truth in Proverbs 13:18, “18 Poverty and shame will come to him who disdains correction, but he who regards a rebuke will be honored.”


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Children must be taught that obedience is good for them and that obedience is a way of life. This life principle will prepare them for a life of obedience to God’s way and God’s principles.


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Teaching these three areas will be a constant part of your life while raising children. Children must have these three life principles consistently taught them over their entire growing up period. Some children will “get it” quicker than others. Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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Some children will require more correction than others. Although all children are different and will respond different. This does not change the truth that all three must be taught for them to be blessed in their lives.

Children who are taught to honor authority, taught obedience, and taught to follow instructions will have more friends, get along with others, get into less trouble, hold a job longer, get a job easier, make more money, and have a happier life than the ones who were not taught these three areas.


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2. Teach a child to reject rebellion, stubbornness and disobedience.

These three areas are opposite to honoring authority, learning obedience, and following instruction. You must show your child in every way possible that these attitudes will ultimately destroy them.


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Your greatest asset in showing your child these three destroying attitudes is your own example in these areas. If you show rebellion towards your boss at work by criticizing him at home then how can you teach your children that rebellion is wrong?


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If you exhibit stubbornness in trying to get your way, maybe even using blackmail or yelling to get your way, how can you then turn around and teach your children that stubbornness is wrong?


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If your family practices disobedience in the area of giving or other biblical commands then you will have a hard time enforcing rules about disobedience.


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You can reinforce the three positive areas while pointing out the destructive results of the three negative areas by pointing out the harmful effects in other situations.


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It is important to remember as you strive to reinforce respect for authority, learning to obey and following instructions that these are principles will allow your child to have self-control which is essential to a blessed life. It also prepares them to a life of obedience to God’s laws.


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3. Consistent, prompt correction is absolutely essential to training a child.

God teaches us that there must be a consequence to wrong actions and wrong attitudes. If there is no consequence, little is learned by the child. These ways are from the One who created all of us and from One who has more wisdom than anybody else. These ways are His ways. Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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Proper correction can take several forms. Using the rod is only one of many ways of correction, however the rod if used correctly is a powerful tool to teach discipline. Let us look at what it says in Proverbs 22:15, “15 Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of correction will drive it far from him.”


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Also look with me at Proverbs 13:24, “24 He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly.” God does not say you are selfish or that you are choosing an easy way out. Instead He says, “He who spares the rod, hates his child.


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I believe the rod should be used when all other forms of correction are not working.

The goal is to reinforce the idea that wrong actions and wrong attitudes will have a negative consequence.


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Proverbs 19:18, “18 Chasten your son while there is hope, and do not set your heart on his destruction.” By the time a girl is eight or nine the rod should be replaced with other forms of correction. By the time a boy is nine or ten the rod should be replaced with other forms of correction.


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In Proverbs 29:17 it says, “17 Correct your son, and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your soul.” I believe wisdom would teach us that if possible always try and find other methods of teaching a child that there is a negative consequences to wrong actions and wrong attitudes.


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There are two areas that parents must be careful in when correcting a child. One, you must be able to distinguish between rebellion and childish behavior. Rebellion must be corrected while childish behavior is simply a child being a child.


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The key between the two is when you can clearly tell that your authority as a parent is being challenged, this is rebellion. Remember wrong attitudes can be as harmful as wrong actions.


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The second area you must be careful in is to make sure that you do not correct in anger or frustration. This will cause you to over do in your correction, which can cause more harm than good. I believe the father should take the lead in the area of correction, but also the father should discuss any correction over with mother beforehand. Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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In the same way God has an overall plan for us in this world. Satan’s plan is to produce more and more chaos and disorder in this world for his plans to succeed. This begins with children not being disciplined and as they grow up they become adults who are not disciplined. Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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Unless we have learned discipline, self-control, and a respect for authority, we will never fulfill God’s plan for our lives. We live in a world that is more and more chaotic and more and more undisciplined.


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If our children become undisciplined, we as parents have in one way failed. So we have a responsibility to bring up our children well and in the fear of God.

In our old age, we are looking back and seeing some of the areas we should have done better as our children were growing up.


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To enjoy your marriage well, ensure you have done your bit in bringing up your children well. You will never regret. Your marriage will also be strong and sound.


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Children come in our lives for a moment. They are indeed a blessing as we see them grow and mature. They have a lasting effect in our marriages.


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Children are a Blessing in our Marriages