Growing Closer in Your Marriage

Tuesday, May 2, 2023 1

Growing closer in your marriage

In most cases when people enter into marriage they appear very close to each other. As they

grow older in their marriages, the gap seems to widen. In few cases some couples grow closer in their marriages. It is God’s desire to see couples drawing closer in their marriages as they grow

older.Kigume Karuri

Tuesday, May 2, 2023 Kigume Karuri 2

• Proverbs 18:22 (NKJV)• 22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing,

And obtains favor from the LORD.• Invest in your marriage "as early as you can,

as much as you can, and as often as you can..."


• Couples should learn HOW TO FIX THEIR MARRIAGES rather than THROWING AWAY THEIR MARRIAGES.

• We are normally in a hurry to keep on blaming our spouses and shifting goal posts. This does not augur well with our spouses. We need to appreciate our spouses as they are the closest persons in our lives; Until death separates you.


• Deliberately and intentionally invest in your marriage just as much as you invest in other areas of your life. This means setting goals in your marriage and working to see that you achieve them.


• Remember when you were newlyweds and you had a list of remarkable dreams ; all those things you planned to do for yourself and as a couple? Where did the time go? And more importantly, where did the dreams go? Often in marriage, day-to-day responsibilities overtake those dreams.

Tuesday, May 2, 2023 6

• It is very important for couples to re-evaluate the status of their life together. Looking back and ahead by setting new goals in all areas from money to sex to kids to travel and more has tremendous benefit to a marriage.

• You cannot grow closer unless you undertake an evaluation of your marriage.

Kigume Karuri


• The results of the evaluation will make you discard things or behaviours that are detrimental to your marriage and will facilitate you to accept the strengths and weaknesses of your spouse.


• Over the years, this has actually assisted me in my marriage. As we are getting older and all our 4 children have left home, I have had to adjust and appreciate my spouse even the more.

• This is our 40th Year of our Marriage and I can tell you that things are getting better.


• Some of the things that make couples grow closer are:

• 1. Strengthen their relationship by working as a team toward a common aim.

• 2. Improving communication because it gives each person a chance to talk about personal dreams and desires, and helps spouses understand themselves and each other better.

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• 3. Be together during even the most challenging times.

• 4. Set objectives that can be achieved as this gives a couple reason to celebrate.

• 5. Prioritize each other always. Let your spouse be number one in your life. This motivates him/her.


• 6. Esteem each other completely.• 7. Don’t attempt ever to tear your spouse

and this will also tear your marriage.• 8. Hold each other accountable.• 9. Give each equal attention and respect.• 10. Total support is crucial


• A marriage that endures through the decades is the result of God’s grace through two people who are committed to one another. It is important when it comes to marriage to keep the basics in mind. If we forget the basic truths about biblical marriage, we easily make assumptions that, over time, undermine the marriage relationship.


• Good marriages take effort. It requires real work to understand your spouse and honour and love him or her. A spouse who is passionate about a strong marriage thinks about his or her spouse often and constantly invests in the relationship.


• Focusing on your needs only will ruin a marriage. Focus on the needs of your spouse. If a spouse feels her spouse is focusing on him or her, he/she will be motivated to grow the marriage.

• Your spouse is so important to the success of your marriage.


• Conflicts come into every marriage. How you handle them is very crucial.

• Sometimes a couple is surprised by a season of difficulty in their marriage. Because they never expected it to happen, they assume their marriage is already as good as gone.


• If, when you encounter such a season, you recognize that every difficulty can be worked through with the grace of God.

• A couple determined to strengthen their relationship, will get through it and often be stronger for it.


• Good marriages go through difficulties.• You know those marriages you look at and

just know are perfect? They aren’t. • What sets their marriages apart is that they

are committed to work through the difficulties.


• Treat your spouse like they matter. “Greet your spouse when he/she arrives home.

• Stop what you’re doing. Go to the door & initiate contact. Smile, offer a hug, kiss or a touch, & express in words.

• If you give strangers the priority of greeting them in energetic ways, why not do this for your spouse?


• Are our marriages failing merely because we are too busy or struggle to balance work and family demands?

• Once you don’t have your spouse as your priority, your marriage will be on the verge of collapsing. When you value your spouse, chances of reciprocating the same will be very high and the reverse is the same.


1 Cor.13:4-8

4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.• 8 Love never fails.


My emphasis is on I Cor. 13:7 which says that love "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." • Keep on bearing with your spouse.• Keep on believing in your spouse.• Keep on hoping in your spouse.


• Keep on enduring with your spouse.• This is what love is all about. • Your spouse needs all these. Do your part

and let God touch your spouse on the same.


• You can’t run away from your closest friend. Be glued together until death separates you.

• Invest your time, resources, energy, etc, in your spouse. You will never regret it in your latter years in your marriage.


• Invest in your marriage "as early as you can, as much as you can, and as often as you can..."

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Growing Closer in Your Marriage