Lesson 2a – Change and the Christian

CounselorDeveloping a Church Based Counseling Ministry

Dr. Danny B. Medina

KEY POINTS

Counseling is all about change.The best counselors are change specialists.Self-change often fails.

KEY POINTSTips to prevent Failure:

Set expectations that are realistic.Avoid situations and people that might create temptations to relapse.

Expect occasional relapse but determine to resume the changed behavior immediately afterward.

After relapse, discuss what happened and take steps to prevent a recurrence.

Provide support and accountability from others.

KEY POINTS

Change that lasts is characterized by:Commitment from the person who wants to change.The setting of attainable goals.Active efforts to prevent relapse.Support from other people.

KEY POINTS

Counseling today is complicated by trends that impact our work, including:A faster pace of life and busyness.Galloping technology, including biotechnology.

An overload of information.Greater interest in spirituality, including non-Christian spirituality from other people.

KEY POINTS

Counselors must have some understanding of postmodernism and know the ways in which it is changing counseling

The Changing Face of Christian Counseling

The Changing Face of Christian Counseling

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Counseling can be both fulfilling and difficult work.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Characteristics of effective Counselors:Psychological health and stability.A genuine interest in people.Empathy, which is the ability to “feel with” counselees.Personal warmth.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Characteristics of effective Counselors:Self-awareness.Tolerance for ambiguity, which means the ability to live with uncertainty.

Awareness of one’s values.Integrity, courage, and the genuine ability to care

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Christian counselors have:Unique assumptions.Unique goals.Unique methods.Unique giftedness.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Counselors’ needs:Relationships.Control.Rescue.Information, built mostly on curiosity.Affirmation, acceptance or approval.Help with one’s own problems.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Common Mistakes of Counselors:Visiting instead of counseling.Trying to solve problems too quickly.Asking too many questions, too rapidly.Being disrespectful or judgmental.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Common Mistakes of Counselors:Getting too involved emotionally.Being artificial or distant.Being defensive when one feels threatened.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Counselors’ Vunerabilty:Counselees who manipulate.Emotional entanglements with counselees, including countertransference.

Counselee resistance.Feelings of sexual attraction involving the counselor and counselee.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Avoiding Burnout:Spiritual strength.Support from others.Freedom from the drive to achieve.A realization that no one person can do

everything.Regular times away from other people.Constant growth in our helping skills.Other people with whom we can share the load.

Counselors and Counseling Key Points

Every counselor should have counselor friends who can give perspective and remind us of the perfect counselor—Jesus Christ. He gives hope, strength, and guidance through his Holy Spirit. He is the ultimate counselor, often working through us.