Openness Agreements: Part Two The Reality of Openness · Presented by © Adoptive Families...

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Openness Agreements: Part TwoThe Reality of Openness

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The Adoptive Families Association of BC

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This presentation was created by Beverly Viveirosand is copyrighted to AFABC.

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Openness Agreements: Part TwoThe Reality of Openness

Presenter: Beverly Viveiros

Agenda

• Realities of Openness• Case Examples• Teens and Adoption• Challenges• Benefits• Review• Panelists: Harriet, adoptive parents, adoptee• Questions• Resources

Realities of Openness – video clip (press play/pause)

Realities of Openness

• Can be complex • Case specific• Innovation is key

Realities of Openness

• Acknowledge fears and biases• Acknowledge own values and beliefs • Not legally binding• MCFD/DAA supports

Openness Agreements for every child

Case Example 1: Aboriginal Sibling Group

• Aboriginal sibling group adopted by a family of aboriginal heritage in another part of the province

• Openness with birth parents and foster parents

• Cultural component to the Openness Agreement

• Visits back to the child home community and cultural community

• Quarterly skype/video link visits

• Email contact • Telephone contact

with foster parents was set up with parameters

Case Example 2: Aboriginal Foster to Adopt

• Aboriginal child adopted by a foster parent in her home community

• Child was a teen and was part of the Openness Agreement process

• Birth mom had access to an email address to keep connection

• Maternal Grandmother had more liberal openness

o Child felt comfortable attending her home as long as her birth mom was not there

o Child was comfortable meeting her in the community

Case Example 3: Non – Aboriginal Adoption

• Non aboriginal child adopted by a non aboriginal home –general adoption

• Child originated from another region of BC

Case Example 3: Non – Aboriginal Adoption

• Birth parents are unavailable

• Adoptive parents and birth mom can register with the Post Adoption Openness registry as well.

Positives of Openness – video clip (press play/pause)

Questions

Teens and Openness

• Most teen adoptions include some openness.

• Teens have memories and relationships that are important to recognize and maintain.

Teens and Openness

The internet and Facebook, and other social media platforms play a significant role for teens.

Challenges

• Geographical distances to overcome

• Access to the internet in some small and remote communities is lacking

Challenges

• Birth parents can be difficult to reach

• Birth parents may have confusion/anger around their role with the children

Challenges

• Adoptive parents may have concerns around intrusiveness

• Increases the complexity of the family structure• Ambivalent feelings around roles in openness

Challenges

• Adoptive parents feelings can be conflicted: meeting theirs and the child’s needs vs birth family members’ needs

• Child may experience conflicted loyalties

• Increases the complexity in parenting

Benefits

• Maintains family connections and relationships• Access to information about the child’s heritage • Children gain family instead of losing family

Benefits

• Reduction of feelings of guilt/shame and abandonment/unlovable

• Recognition of the child as a whole person with a history

• Easier transition for children as there is respect for their past

Benefits

• An ability to provide/gain ongoing health information

• Less fear for adoptive parents of possible family kidnapping the child

• Birth parents and adoptive parents are real to each other

Review of Openness

• Openness Agreements outline the extent of the openness

• Each agreement is unique

Panelists

• Harriet Fancott, Communications Expert, Adoptive parent

• Sarah Reid, Adoptive Parent

References

• Farlex Inc, (2003-2016). Legal Dictionary. Retrieved March 16, 2016, from The Free Dictionary by Farlex: http://legal-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/Good+Faith

• MCFD. (2012, January). Adoption Worker Training program. Working with Prospective Parents Placing Children with Families. BC, Canada: Ministry of Children and Family Development.

• MCFD. (2016). Welcome to Adoption. Retrieved March 16, 2016, from Ministry of Children and Families: http://www.mcf.gov.bc.ca/adoption/index.htm

• Roberts, C. A. (1989, November/December). Openness, Honesty and Trust: The Benefits of Open Adoption. OURS.

Contact Us1-877 ADOPT-07www.bcadoption.com

Rebekah Craig rcraig@bcadoption.com

Contact the presenterBev ViveirosBev.Viveiros@gov.bc.ca

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Openness Agreements: Part Two The Reality of Openness · Presented by © Adoptive Families...

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