(Short) Business Correspondence

(SHORT) BUSINESS CORRESPONDENCE

Types & Genres

BEFORE YOU BEGINRevisit PAGOSSpecific purpose may determine

organizationadjustment, claim, request, complaint, inquiry, response, “to-file”, etc.

Determine whether correspondence is: good news / positive / neutral bad news / negative persuasive / sales

POSITIVE/NEUTRAL: COMMUNICATION GOALS

POSITIVE/NEUTRAL: ORGANIZATION

Direct Approach Organization OPENING: main idea, purpose, request BODY: details CLOSING: request action (if needed), goodwill

closing

NEGATIVE/BAD NEWS: COMMUNICATION GOALS

Acceptance—strive to help receiver understand and accept the bad news.

Positive image—promote good image of yourself and your organization. Strive to reduce bad feelings. Convey fairness.

Message clarity—make the message so clear that no further correspondence is necessary.

Protection—avoid creating legal liability.

NEGATIVE/BAD NEWS: ORGANIZATION

Indirect Approach Organization (BEBE)

Buffer: opening with context Explanation Bad news (offer alternative?) Exit: goodwill closing (offer alternative?)

TYPES OF BUFFERS Start with any good news or positive

elements the letter contains. State a fact or provide a chronology of

events. Refer to enclosures in the letter. Thank the reader for something he or

she has done. State a general principle.

How effective are the following openings for a letter that refuses to grant credit?

Reveals the bad news bluntly.

Sounds phony and canned.

Unfortunately, your application for credit has been reviewed negatively.

We sincerely regret that we must deny your credit application.

EVALUATING BUFFER STATEMENTS

Gives the wrong impression.

We are delighted to receive your application for credit.

The recent resurgence of interest in the stock market caught many of us by surprise.

Is not relevant.

How effective are the following openings for a letter that refuses to grant credit?

EVALUATING BUFFER STATEMENTS

How effective are the following openings for a letter that refuses a request for a donation?

Fails to engage the reader.

Compliments reader and implies approval.

Your request for a monetary contribution has been referred to me for reply.We appreciate the fine work your organization is doing to provide early childhood programs that meet the needs of parents and very young children.

EVALUATING BUFFER STATEMENTS

Use thepassivevoice.

Suggesta compromise

or an alternative.

Implythe

refusal.

Be clearbut not

overly graphic.

Place thebad news

in a subordinateclause.

Use along

sentence.

Avoidthe

spotlight.

Techniques forCushioningBad News

Use a long sentence. Don’t put the bad news in a short, simple sentence.

Avoid the spotlight. Put the bad news in the middle of a paragraph halfway through the message.

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

Place the bad news in a subordinate clause.Although we have no opening for an individual with your qualifications at this time, we are pleased that you thought of us when you started your job search.

Be clear but not overly graphic.

Instead of this

Our investigation reveals that you owe three creditors large sums and that you were fired from your last job.

Try this

Our investigation reveals that your employment status and your financial position are unstable at this time.

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

Imply the refusal.

Instead of thisWe cannot contribute to your charity this year.

Try thisAlthough all our profits must be reinvested in our company this year, we hope to be able to support your future fund-raising activities.

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

Suggest a compromise or an alternative.

Although the cashmere sweater cannot be sold at the erroneously listed price of $18, we can allow you to purchase this $218 item for only $118.

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

Consider using passive voice verbs.

Instead of this We cannot make a contribution at this time.

Try this A contribution cannot be made at this time.

Passive-voice verbs focus attention on actions rather than on personalities. They are useful in being tactful.

Active voiceI cannot allow you to return the DVD player because . . . .

Passive voiceReturn of the DVD player is not allowed because . . . .

Ryan checked the report, but he missed the error.

The report was checked, but the error was missed.

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

Consider using passive voice verbs.

CUSHIONING THE BAD NEWS

Notice that passive-voice verb phrases always include “helper” verbs, such as is, are, was, were, being, or been.

Examples of “helper” verbs forming passive voice:

The report was checked. The schedule is being revised. Invitations were sent.

CLOSING / ALTERNATIVES Offer the reader another way to get

what’s wanted (compromise, substitute, etc.)

Suggest the writer really cares about the reader.

Enable the reader to reestablish psychological freedom (choice).

End on a forward looking, positive note.

PERSUASIVE: COMMUNICATION GOALS

To have the reader act. To provide enough information so the

reader knows exactly what to do. To overcome any objections that might

prevent or delay action.

PERSUASIVE: GENERAL ORGANIZATION Opening: Problem statement? Hook?

Detail? Situation/Context? Request? LINK TO READER BENEFIT

Body: details, reasons, etc. Close: restate request, idea

PERSUASIVE: COLD ORGANIZATION

AIDAAttentionInterestDesireAction

PERSUASIVE: COLD ORGANIZATION

Capture the ATTENTION of the reader. Offer something valuable, promise a benefit, ask a question, provide a quotation, and so forth

PERSUASIVE: COLD ORGANIZATION

Build INTEREST.Emphasize a central selling point. Make rational and emotional appeals

PERSUASIVE: COLD ORGANIZATION

Elicit DESIRE. To reduce resistance, use

testimonials, money-back guarantees, free samples, performance tests, or other techniques.

PERSUASIVE: COLD ORGANIZATION

Motivate ACTION. Offer a gift, promise an incentive, limit the offer, set a deadline, or guarantee satisfaction. Include a P.S. with a special inducement.

PERSUASIVE: READER BENEFITS Benefits and advantages the reader

gets from using your services buying your products following your policies adopting your ideas

Demonstrate your concern for quality and meeting customers’ needs

GOOD READER BENEFITS ARE Adapted to the audience

Saving money vs. saving time Developed using logic and details

Accurate Detailed

Phrased in You-Attitude Benefits are often “frontloaded”