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If you or your team is trying to standout amongst the crowd and be noticed, then you must have some sort of differentiation to set you apart. Differentiation does not mean going against the grain of the workplace, it definitely does not mean alienation, it means finding something incrementally different to stand out amongst the rest and be noticed.
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What Your Appearance Says About You
Key Points • Having the appropriate physical appearance, dressing for the next step • Breaking down your emotional appearance, what people think of you • Differentiation without alienation Remember in our previous post where we state that perception is everything (Building Social Credibility in the Workplace); your physical and emotional appearance paints a perception about you whether you are actively trying to do it or not. We live in a social centric world where people love to talk about and give judgment on others. While we will not be able to change the habits of others, we can certainly be ready for them.
1) Having the appropriate physical appearance, dressing for the next step Every industry and office across the country has a standard that says how you should and should not dress. If you are in finance in Manhattan, then the standard
Art of the Wingman for Business is dedicated to the businesswomen and businessmen who seek greatness beyond their own and find their successes through helping others succeed. The Business Wingman follows the path of the selfless person.
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dress is a suit and tie. Just like if you are working in an IT startup in Mountain View, CA, then the standard dress is probably casual tech chic. Since there is not one standard to follow, you must do your due diligence and do your own internal office research. Identify the type of dress of your immediate manager and the management team above you. And please remember, I am not saying that if your manager wears pleaded khaki pants from the 90’s with a short sleeved button down shirt and a sweater vest from Structure, that you should forego your own personal style and try to emulate. That would be ridiculous and a little creepy. What I am saying is don’t take this advice literally. Take notes of what they are wearing and dress accordingly but make it your own. I am saying that you should identify what the standards are in your workplace. Do that by asking yourself the following questions:
a) What is the accepted dress code for your office? b) Do your manager and his or her peers dress more formally or casually? c) Think of the person whom just got a promotion and how did they dress?
Once you have answered these questions, it will help you to determine how you should dress for success:
a) Adjust your dress to look like/imply that you are ready for the next level b) Maintain your own style and personality but adhere to the standards you are
setting for success To reiterate, I am not saying that solely dressing the part will help you get to the next level, but it is a start. Your management wants to feel like that if you make that transition, then you will easily fit in. 2) Breaking down your emotional appearance, what people think of you Emotional appearance is best explained in psychological terms. The Center for Non-‐Verbal Studies describes these cues or signs as indicative of emotion. These signs are broken down into 3 main categories: facial expressions, body movements, and tone of voice.
1. Facial Expressions: The act of communicating a mood, attitude, opinion, feeling, or other message by contracting the muscles of the face. This can be expressed as a smile, frown, pout, surprise, disgust, frustration, or disagreement. Each of these facial expressions indicates a perceived mood and can easily be misinterpreted1.
2. Body Movements: These are unknown body gestures that communicate an
emotion or feeling without knowingly doing this. Particularly with our posture, breathing, clearing of throat, clenching of fist and gestures, we can
1 http://center-‐for-‐nonverbal-‐studies.org/emotionq.htm
give the emotion of tension or annoyance to others without actually saying anything.
3. Tone of Voice: Your tone of voice reflects psychological arousal, emotion, and
mood. It may also carry social information, as in a sarcastic, superior, or submissive manner of speaking2. Be weary of how your voice changes when speaking to certain colleagues and with management. You never know what you really may be saying.
This is a more difficult one to explain but at it most basic concept, it comes down to whether people think of you as a nice person who is friendly to others in the office, or whether you always look upset and are socially awkward to talk to. 3) Differentiation without alienation If you or your team is trying to standout amongst the crowd and be noticed, then you must have some sort of differentiation to set you apart. Differentiation does not mean going against the grain of the workplace, it definitely does not mean alienation, it means finding something incrementally different to stand out amongst the rest and be noticed. Please visit our blog at http://www.artofthewingman.com.
2 http://center-‐for-‐nonverbal-‐studies.org/tone.htm