Having A Bad Day?

Sometimes it just doesn’t matter how hard you try, or how careful you are, it just seems karma has it in for you and there’s nothing you can do to make it any better. This was just one of those days when you know it couldn’t possibly get any worse, and then it goes and surprises you by getting even worse.

So it’s my first day on the new job. I get up extra early and head into the bathroom to get all cleaned up and freshly shaved to make that all-important first impression. So I run the bath water until it’s at just the right temperature then pull the plunger to activate the shower.

It was always a little wobbly but why now? Why not tomorrow or yesterday? OK, never mind, I’ll just do a quick sponge bath in the sink. So I brush my teeth then do a quick gargle, but the glass slips out of my hand and lands in the sink.

Seriously? And I haven’t even shaved yet. OK, I’ll use the electric razor and call it good for now.

So I’m done with the shave and tried my best to cover up the BO with deodorant and after shave since the idea of taking a shower is no longer going to happen. I look terrible and I know it.

I leave the bathroom and head into the kitchen for my coffee that’s been in the making while I was in the bathroom.

I really can’t believe my eyes. What else could possibly go wrong this morning? Since it’s getting late, I figure I’ll get a cup of the nasty stuff from the local convenience store on the way, and throw some clothes on (good thing I prepped the night before) and head out the door.

NOOOOOOOOO! I should call the police and make out a report but I’m already behind schedule and don’t want to be late for my first day on the new job so I call a cab and decide to make the report after work tonight. Finally the taxi shows up and I arrive at work just a couple of minutes late. No biggie, right? I’ll just explain the disaster of a morning I’ve had and they’ll understand. I hope.

I walk into the office and introduce myself to the middle-aged lady at the reception desk and ask for my new boss. She tells me to take a seat and he’ll be out shortly. After a few minutes, the boss emerges from a door off to the side and approaches with a smile and an outreached hand. I stand up, we shake hands and he offers to show me around. He’s giving me this funny look and I’m not sure what the joke is until I look down.

Just when I thought it could get no worse. Embarrassed is not the word. I was well beyond embarrassed. I just wished a hole would open up in the floor and swallow me. So we get to my cubicle and after listening to my account of the morning’s mishaps, he wishes me a better day than the one I started with and disappears into the office nearby. At least he seemed to have a sense of humor about the whole debacle. I sit back in the chair and try to untangle my thoughts when suddenly…

The chair made a loud cracking sound and the back broke, sending me onto the floor where I was collecting myself from when the boss come out of the office and wants to know what the noise is about. He comes over, looks at me, looks at the chair, shakes his head and walks back to his office. I get the feeling I’m not exactly making the stellar first impression I’d hoped for. The guy next to me reaches down and helps me up off the floor. He asks if I’m OK then walks me over to a small break area off to the side with a coffee maker and several vending machines. I get a cup of coffee and a small packet of candy.

Lemon. I hate lemon.

Finally the work day finishes and I get a ride home from the guy who helped me off the floor. He drops me off and I make my way up the walkway to the front door where…

Lucky for me, the back door was open and I was able to go inside. After a day like I just had, I needed a drink so I pull a nice bottle of German white off the rack and go to pulling the cork.

Nice. I go to get the pizza out of the oven and, well…

So I figure, OK, stir fry. Beats pizza anyway. I’ll see how that new frying pan does.

Non-stick, it said. Right.

I’m done with this day. I’m going into the yard to cut up some firewood for the fireplace to burn this winter and burn off some of this frustration.

So, how was your day, Dear?