A Crossword Lover’sSalute to

Mad Magazine

Eric Berline r i c @ e r i c b e r l i n . c o m

T he Wit and Wisdom of Alfred E. Neuman (No! Really!)Fill the missing words from each Neuman quote into the grid below to get a five letter word

reading down the shaded center column. Answer, page 16.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 15 16

17 18 19

20 21 22

23 24 25 26 27

28 29 30 31

32 33 34 35

36 37

38 39 40

41 42 43 44 45 46

47 48 49 50 51

52 53 54 55

56 57 58

59 60 61

62 63 64

Across1. Size up7. One of Noah’s sons11. Hot shot14. Makeshift shelter15. Lock part16. Henri or Pierre, e.g.17. Neuman Quote #1: “Just because

you put your foot down doesn’tmean it won’t end up ____!”

19. USA competitor20. Fly like an eagle21. Approaching the hour22. Snapshot23. Chaplin persona25. Neuman Quote #2: “When you’re

in ____ it’s a good idea to keepyour mouth shut!”

28. Noise in a library29. Free (of)31. Remuneration32. Many a folk song35. “À votre ___!” (French toast)36. Neuman Quote #3: “A ____ is

someone who minds his buildinstead of vice versa!”

38. Part of a religious title40. City on Lake Michigan41. Endless, poetically43. Rearward44. Long-distance letters47. Neuman Quote #4: “Today, if you

ask a ____ to let you seesomething for 10 grand, he’llshow you the door!”

50. Old-fashioned music hall52. Strength: Lat.53. Plows55. Net56. Pen name57. Neuman Quote #5: “The one sure

thing about ____ is that it’s notvery common.”

59. Hard-rock connection60. 27, to 361. Lighter62. Choice of sizes: Abbr.63. “Believe ___ not!”64. Waves at

Down1. The most desirable guests2. Men of La Mancha3. Doctor’s order4. Vast, old-style5. R-V hookup?6. Collate

7. Beamed8. ___ cuisine9. Blocks, legally10. Dashboard inits.11. Like some missiles12. Philharmonic event13. 911 responder18. Nosy one22. Fairy tale setting24. Nutty confection26. Suspected27. Deli buy30. Sick32. Gets on33. Foreign V.I.P.

34. Actress Yvonne of “The Munsters”36. Kind of error37. Peanut butter brand38. Calendar abbr.39. Reversion42. Go to a restaurant44. Cruel one45. It’s a cinch46. Centers48. Nowhere49. Composer Bernstein51. Caterpillar competitor54. Monkey wrench, metaphorically56. ___-relief57. 201, classically58. Elton John, e.g.

14532

Department of Silly CinemaMatch the parody movie titles found in this crossword with the real movie titles in the list below. Taken in theorder their parodies appear in the grid, the letters preceding each movie title will spell out a five-letter word.

Answer, page 15.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

16 17 18

19 20 21

22 23 24

25 26 27

28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35

36 37 38 39

40 41 42 43 44

45 46 47 48

49 50 51 52 53

54 55 56 57

58 59 60 61 62

63 64 65 66 67

68 69 70 71 72 73

74 75 76

77 78 79

80 81 82

Across1. Canon competitor6. Inventor Otis12. [“Hey!”]16. “...two mints ___!”17. Communicate a message18. To ___ (perfectly)19. Movie Parody #121. Starring role22. Adam and Eve are in it23. Corrida cheer24. Brought to life25. Business card abbr.26. Demolition compounds27. Abbr. in a help wanted ad28. ___ Dhabi (Mideast capital)31. Movie Parody #236. Wad of money39. Like clown shoes40. Beast of Borden41. Simile’s middle43. Word from Miss Piggy44. Common contraction45. Movie Parody #349. Common possessive50. Civil War letters51. Road crew’s supply52. Dadaist Max54. Frolicking, after “on”56. Not as smooth58. Movie Parody #462. Bird call63. Filing asst.64. Ominous day65. Head of st.68. Suffix with huck69. Bled70. Tom Watson’s tour74. Twice tres75. Movie Parody #577. Old Dodge78. 21 shillings79. Mrs. Phil Donahue80. Autograph81. Inconsistent82. Reach alternative

Down1. 1994 Tony winner Diana2. Memo starter3. Critter in the woods4. Beginning5. “Siddhartha” author6. Common Market money7. Part of U.C.L.A.8. Recite9. Thin and graceful10. Religious dissent11. Bards’ affirmations12. Lummox13. Like many home audio systems14. Sam in “I Am Sam”15. Sam on “Cheers”20. Frodo’s friend

24. Sheets and pillowcases26. City south of Bartlesville28. Presidential nickname29. Somewhat uncovered30. Like surprise party recipients, ideally32. Cousin of a camel33. ___ effort34. Where to find clear sailing35. “The Spanish Tragedy” dramatist37. Actress Delaney38. Aromatic wood42. Sternward43. Haggard of C&W46. Second-hand47. RPM indicators48. Sitcom planet49. Toque, for one53. Big inits. in credit reporting55. Lassoes57. One who eggs59. Get psyched60. Slow ballet dance61. Lessee66. “___ Time!” (70’s musical)67. Parish priest68. 18-wheeler70. Influence71. Creole vegetable72. Tiny brook73. Patronizing sort

74. “Hel-l-l-lp!”75. Some football linemen: Abbr.76. Tennis do-over

a. Raiders of the Lost Arkb. The Usual Suspects

c. The Silence of the Lambsd. Lethal Weapon

e. American Beautyf. Ghostbusters

g. Apocalypse Nowh. L.A. Confidential

i. Saving Private Ryanj. A Clockwork Orange

k. Reservoir Dogsl. Braveheart

m. Blade Runnern. The Godfather

o. Cool Hand Lukep. The Princess Bride

q. Forrest Gumpr. Young Frankensteins. Gone with the Wind

t. Almost Famousu. Dog Day Afternoonv. Back to the Future

w. Sling Bladex. Minority Report

y. Bonnie and Clydez. Groundhog Day

A Fold-In Crossword

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 15 16

17 18 19

20 21 22

23 24 25 26

27 28 29

30 31 32

33 34 35 36 37 38 39

40 41 42

43 44 45 46 47 48

49 50 51

52 53

54 55 56 57 58 59

60 61 62

63 64 65

What would any tribute to Mad be without a Fold-In? After you’ve completed this puzzle,fold the puzzle so that Tab A meets Tab B. Four rows reading across will spell new words,

and these will provide a clue to this puzzle’s five-letter answer. Answer, page 16.

Across1. Shady alcove6. 2001 non-fiction bestseller

by Bernard Goldberg10. To be, in Bordeaux14. First name on “Saturday

Night Live”15. At one time, at one time16. Mother of Poseidon17. Actor Colin of “Bridget

Jones’s Diary”18. Butts heads20. Lock parts22. It’s big in Cuba23. Purplish red26. Actress Graham27. Arrival29. Shows some scalp30. Partner31. Sorority letters33. Professional org.34. Couric’s co-anchor36. Card game for gamblers40. French seas41. Visit43. “Tsk!”47. “Head of State” star, 200349. Some mutual funds51. Like simple instructions52. Fine, in France53. Target number54. Sponges56. Shooting match60. Start of many a prayer61. French silk62. Conger catcher63. Onetime Chicago V.I.P.64. She’ll straighten things up65. Zzzz

Down1. He was voiced by Paul

Fusco2. French pooh-bah

3. Winter comment4. Dodging the police5. Straightens a picture6. Hospital room item7. Part of the eye8. Doofus9. Phase10. Misprints11. Senators org.12. Like some musical

instruments13. They smooth the way19. Is rude at the dinner table21. Role for Brosnan23. Southwestern sight24. Musicians’ gear25. Storms and Prizms26. It’s a laugh28. Beat soundly32. “If music be the food of

love...” speaker

35. Circle parts36. Turned one’s back on37. Words before “of gold”38. Jambalaya need39. Peeling potatoes, in the

army40. Drinks made from honey42. Dangerous African pests43. Attach, in a way44. Work that pays respect45. Some Oldsmobiles46. Single-celled organisms48. Got going50. Theological belief53. Certain ocean liner,

familiarly55. Ode starter57. “Rock and Roll Is King”

music group58. Eternally, to poets59. Sei halved

T he Lighter Side of CrosswordsIn this crossword dedicated to Mad’s Dave Berg, the five theme answers are the punch lines of the

comic strips seen below. When you’ve completed the puzzle, the shaded letters (which are used only inthe across answers) will spell out a word. Answer, page 15.

25-Across

41-Across

54-Across

73-Across

83-Across

T he Lighter Side of Crosswords

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

17 18 19 20

21 22 23 24

25 26 27

28 29 30

31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40

41 42 43 44

45 46 47 48

49 50 51 52 53

54 55 56 57 58

59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66

67 68 69 70 71 72

73 74 75

76 77 78 79

80 81 82

83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91

92 93 94 95

96 97 98 99

100 101 102 103

Across1. Sarandon’s “Banger Sisters”

co-star5. Stand10. Hankering13. Kind of saxophone17. Sheltered, nautically18. Name in a 1999 business

merger19. That, in Toledo20. Kind of camp21. Chores22. Burgle24. Very dry25. See instructions28. Enron CEO Ken29. Feel bad30. Little kid31. ___ lazuli34. The Donald’s first ex37. Put on television38. Fight stopper41. See instructions45. Martin’s “Mad” colleague46. Ballroom dance in 2/4 time47. ___ kwon do48. Galley items49. Taxpayer ID50. ___ canto51. Times past53. Prologue54. See instructions59. Lost61. Author Dinesen63. They might be classified64. Seasonal contraction67. Irritation68. Drink suffix70. Spokes72. Dry out, as lips73. See instructions76. Certain docs77. Genetic letters78. Extremely good person79. Being pulled along80. Book jacket blurb81. Game extensions: Abbr.82. Do-say link83. See instructions92. Cathedral area93. It often has a “Popcorn”

button95. New Rochelle college96. Outside the plate97. Drillers’ org.98. Something to think about99. Boorish one100. Stand in front of the

group101. Moon-landing vehicle102. Bias103. It may be critical

Down1. Pilgrimage to Mecca2. Baseballer Matty or Felipe3. Natural snares4. Baby bird5. Perth ___, N.J.6. Brought into the world7. “Oh, sure!”8. Alternative to Ivory9. Lodge member10. Story subtitled “The

Yeshiva Boy”11. Where el sol rises12. Middle of the day13. Top monk14. Actress Petty15. Brag about16. Giant slugger Mel23. Former hoops star

Thomas26. Some “Law and Order”

characters: Abbr.27. Mower brand29. Slashed phrase31. Ad-___ (improvises)32. Hot serves33. Greek mountain that is

home to Delphi

34. Author Calvino35. U-Haul unit36. Riles up37. Simile center38. Remark made while

dusting off one’shands

39. Theatre critic Walter40. Approximately42. Undelete43. “___ wrap!”44. Vocal inflection50. Kind of scarf52. Acid neutralizer53. Hosp. devices55. “Why not?”56. Lord’s holding57. Make impure58. “Gotcha”59. ___ in a poke60. Short-term type62. Fields of study65. Emilia’s husband66. Blow up68. Bizarre69. Org. involved in raids71. Clangor72. Distrustful attitude

74. Chicago paper, familiarly75. Ethyl acetate, e.g.79. Equal: Prefix80. Kennel club listing81. Philosopher known for his

“razor”82. Like a good guard83. Mayberry boy84. Meat inspection inits.85. Congressional staffer86. Off base?87. Tabula ___88. All tied up89. Some kind of nut90. Hazzard County deputy91. Cotton ball applications92. Pointy tool94. Photo ___

Spy Vs. Spy: The Puzzle

Rows1. Traveller’s destination, perhapsP.D. callsAuthor of “Bridge is My Passion”2. Strong as ___Christopher’s girlfriend, on “The Sopranos”$1,000, in slang3. GizmoFour-sided figures4. VernacularPortly and then someNavel variety5. It might be blue or gray“Mad” specialtyAlmost forever6. Haydn piece Isn’t on the levelQueens stadium7. 80’s-90’s singer BakerRushed toward“At Random” autobiographer8. Weasel outProtector of nurses, travellers, and the blind9. Stockpile“Thimble Theater” mainstayAuthor Bombeck10. Minimize the importanceBring the house downError indicator11. Like some politics Invited Broadway musical that includes “One

Song Glory”12. U.‘80’s action series, with “The”NFL quarterback Doug13. “The Thinking Eye” artistTattleAdjective preceding “molasses”14. “___ big deal.” Connect again, in a wayNutty15. FacilitatorsTrade centerStationed

Columns1. Long-tailed parrotMystery writer ParetskyDetachable shirtfront2. ___ about (approximately)Give an edge toIts motto is “The essentials of imaging”3. South Seas kingdomHirschfeld’s daughterLike some dresses4. Infer from what is already knownLike some triangles5. Espresso orderIdentifiesDaniel Webster, e.g.

6. “See ya!”AmazementGolf bag items7. Legal estate workToshiba competitorK-68. I.Q. test pioneerNot suitableGlider composition9. Despotic governorLess clear, as river waterTraffic-light color10. Mean grinActress RobertsC sharp11. Most unclearCircus propInnocent12. Pays the priceGive a shoutBruins’ home13. Record label specializing in

anthologiesFirst in a line of carsW.B.A. stats14. First-aid kit itemRemember fondly15. Joins togetherInsurance company represented

by a duckDual-limbed vertebrate

In this puzzle, you’ll play the role of the White Spy, returning home after a long day. You’ve got a code you can’t crack—somehow you have tofigure out how to get a five-letter word out of the grid of letters at the bottom of the page. And now you suspect that the Black Spy has been

here. As you fill in the grid, look out for five traps that have been placed for you. The locations of those traps will tell you which letters to circlein the other grid. Taken in order from top to bottom, those letters will spell out this puzzle’s answer. Answer, page 15.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

One Fine Day in a Crossword Dedicated to Don Martin...

Across1. Fall flower6. Strongly advise10. Classic toothpaste

brand15. “Your majesty”19. River of France20. Interpret21. Dunn and Ephron22. 126-Across undoer23. ARGLE GLARGLE

GLORGLE GLUK!27. Kinetoscope inventor28. Russian retreat29. Other, in Oaxaca30. “At Seventeen” singer31. Sine qua ___32. Pennies: Abbr.34. Know-___36. Digs38. CRUGAZUNCH!43. Schoolboy collars44. Pay attention45. Easy ___48. Fed. retirement org.50. Kitchen amts.51. Abbreviation on a

cornerstone55. Slanted: Abbr.56. Pac-10 team59. Send e-mail, perhaps62. Overly63. Kind of acid65. Image receivers68. Served in a cream

sauce withmushrooms

70. FUSHSKLORK!73. Team in Cincinnati74. Actress Bertinelli75. 1973 Rolling Stones

hit77. GOP fundraisers78. Talk back80. 1999 Ron Howard

film81. Desires82. Not on shore84. Comic strip cries87. Big name on the Net89. It’s just over the 6

90. Targets for 73-Across95. Get savvy to97. ZWIT ZWIT ZWIT

— KLIK!102. Iced tea brand104. “___ use”105. Use a La-Z-Boy106. 155, said another

way107. Prefix with light108. “Can ___?”111. “___ is human”113. Iced tea brand115. STOOPFT!119. Reverberation120. High-up home121. Noisy “excuse me”122. Wipe out123. Queue after Q124. Insolent look125. Future ABA

member’s exam126. Editorial strikes

Down1. Silver-colored2. Lamont Cranston’s

alter ego, with“The”

3. Italian city on the Po

4. Some tech schoolgrads: Abbr.

5. Pack up and move6. Sizable server7. Officially listed: Abbr.8. Galahad’s colleague9. Having the force of law10. Asthma medicine,

most likely11. Small dog, for short12. Slangy suffix13. Ship-related: Abbr.14. On both sides of15. Vane dir.16. “If ___ broke...”17. Convened again18. Prefix with centric24. Emcee’s

responsibility25. Macbeth, for one26. Biblical prophet33. Taxpayer IDs35. Some watch faces,

for short37. Legalistic phrase39. Top limit40. Bank, to a credit card41. Ballplayer

accoutrements42. Above the

thermosphere

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

19 20 21 22

23 24 25 26

27 28 29 30

31 32 33 34 35 36 37

38 39 40 41 42

43 44

45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54

55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62

63 64 65 66 67 68 69

70 71 72

73 74 75 76

77 78 79 80 81

82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89

90 91 92 93 94 95 96

97 98 99 100 101

102 103 104 105 106

107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114

115 116 117 118

119 120 121 122

123 124 125 126

45. Modern toothpastebrand

46. Pollen producers47. Best Supporting

Actor, 199149. Part of a long play52. Kind of missile53. Investment plan in

which all of themoney goes to thelast survivor

54. Track closely57. Filmmaker

Wertmuller58. Certain viewpoint60. Black and tan

ingredient61. Cry from the crib64. Financial auditors65. He played Maximus

in “Gladiator”66. Stunned67. Sealy competitor69. Certain Africans71. Pay stretcher?72. Copenhagen park73. Lingerie item76. Guinness Book suffix79. Ward of “The

Fugitive”83. Lago contents

85. Opera’s ___ TeKanawa

86. Even more annoying88. Place for a cap89. Like the moon’s

surface91. Do-___92. Christie and others93. Hewlett-Packard

competitor94. Gambia’s neighbor96. Storing, say97. Plant disease98. Bridge positions99. Real100. Strip, as a whale101. Gets out of the way102. Sit in the driver’s

seat, say103. Radar-equipped

plane109. Well, in Guatemala110. Basic French verb112. Ted and Shelley’s co-

star114. Holding a grudge116. Cardinals great

Brock117. 0-0, say118. Ambulance asst.

This crossword payshomage to the inspired

sound effects that Mad’sDon Martin included in mostof his cartoons. Five theme

entries are clued only assound effects, taken fromactual Martin strips. Afteryou’ve solved the puzzle,

rearrange the circled lettersin each answer to form a

word. What five-letter wordcan be placed in front of allof these to form a series oftwo-word phrases? Answer,

page 15.

T he StripThis puzzle salutes a mainstay of Mad. In this crossword variant, across words are clued normally,

although word lengths are not given. Down words are all five letters long, but these clues are presentedrandomly—it’s up to you to determine which word goes where. One of the down words, however,

has no clue at all. Which one? Answer, page 16.

1

2

3

4

5

Across

1 It’s featured in every issue of “Mad”

2 It’s just above the brim

Consume more food than

Mixture

3 “Uncle Vanya” playwright Chekhov

Personnel person, sometimes

Expenditure

“The Simpsons” schoolteacher Krabappel

4 Brainstorming

Broke a taboo

“The Balcony” and “On the Beach,” for two

5 Subway, e.g.: Abbr.

Recesses

They play in Minute Maid Park

“Buffalo Stance” singer Cherry

Down

• Actor Greene

• Bangkok residents

• Courtyards

• Diminutive endings

• French aunt

• Great big hit

• Holiday visitor

• Humorist Nash

• Israel’s Moshe

• “Mr. Belvedere” actress Graff

• Muslim leaders

• Pro golfer Nick

• Right nearby

• “See ya!”

• Some Dodges

• Square

• Take a stab at it

• Thin and bony

• WWII danger

Margin Calls

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 15 16

17 18 19

20 21 22

23 24 25 26

27 28 29 30

31 32 33 34 35 36

37 38 39

40 41 42

43 44 45

46 47 48 49

50 51 52 53 54 55

56 57 58

59 60 61

62 63 64

Across1. It’s got highs and lows5. Airport lineup9. Hitching post?14. Rolls snake eyes, maybe15. The Beehive State16. Last First Lady of the

U.S.S.R.17. “Not only that...”18. Earning a lot20. Dewy21. Walkman, for instance22. Symbol of life23. Actor Milo25. Making a go of it27. Declaration of one’s

motives30. German city on the

Danube31. Role for Arnold32. Balancing factors37. “I Do” singer Lisa38. “You ___ mouthful!”39. Big name in wine40. Not on the agenda42. Happen again43. Part of some e-mail

addresses44. Doppleganger46. Journalists Stewart and

Joseph49. It might get put in a 27-

Across50. Gawk at51. Word in the title of a 2002

Best Picture nominee53. Dancer’s teammate56. Kink58. “...the half ___!”59. C. P. Snow’s “___ of

Varnish”60. Unpopular spots61. Candle holder62. Flair63. ___ East64. Passes easily

This crossword salutes Sergio Aragones, whose tiny comic strips have graced the margins of Mad magazine fordecades. Fourteen grid entries in this puzzle will similarly require the use of the margins— they will extend one spacepast the confines of the grid. These letters, read in order from a starting point you must determine, will spell out a clue

to a five-letter word. Answer, page 16.

Down1. Lowly one2. Mallorca, e.g.3. “State Fair” setting4. “The Vain Jackdaw” and

others5. “&*$#@&*!”6. Warfare sound effect7. Catch some rays8. Ralph Lauren item9. Architectural geegaw10. My ___11. Two-stage missile12. Letting up13. Odiferous19. Poet Pablo24. Female lobster26. Half of a famous 50’s

comedy team27. Org. co-founded by Felix

Frankfurter

28. Day divider29. Projecting window33. More34. One way to meet35. Nasty bugs36. Certain cameras: Abbr.38. Dull state41. Certain measuring

device42. One of a cartoon duo45. Mattel competitor46. One of the three Furies47. Artist Neiman48. Brooke Shield’s sitcom

role50. U. stats52. Nits54. Studio need55. Summers abroad57. Batman after Michael

Back to Square OneMad wasn’t always a magazine full of satire and parody. It started out, back in October of 1952, as anoddball comic book full of rather silly adventure stories. The first two issues each contained four suchstories, and the titles of those eight stories can be found in the crossword grid on the next page. The

introduction to each title can be seen below. When you’ve completed the puzzle, transfer the numberedletters to the spaces below the grid to get a clue to a five letter word. Answer, page 16.

6-AcrossTerror Dept.! Please! We warn you! Do not read this story! Throw this comic book away be-fore it is too late!... Very well, rash fool! Read on! But remember! We warned you! There aremany things not meant for the eyes of man! Ooohheeeheeeheee...

30-DownScience-Fiction Dept.! Go forward! Go forward into space, forward into time! Go forward...1952! 1962! 1982! Go! Go to 1,000,000 A.D.! That’s far enough! Back up a little! Look! TheEarth! A mass of steely cities and men! Men? No! Not really men! More like...

44-DownCrime Dept.! Come away from your fresh paint homes on tree-lined streets!... Away from yourclean linen, your grade-A milk! Come to the garbage-canned, broken windowed land of theunderworld! Come to the home of gangsters, gorillas, and...

1-DownWestern Dept.! Gimme a drink, Joe, an’ let me tell you a story ‘bout the rootinest, tootinest,straightest shootinest cowpoke ever to ride the Pecos Trail! You see... when he made uphis mind to do somethin’, he didn’t change easy... an’ what he made up his mind to do wuz...to kill a...

29-AcrossTerror Dept.: There are many things going on in the world that are very strange... that haveno explanation! Many things in many phases of life... even in the game of baseball! There arethe superstitions, the beliefs in the unnatural, the beliefs in the...

36-DownJungle Dept.: Africa! Wild... untamed land where time stands tangled in the jungle! Africa!...Home of the fierce Gmowgli pygmies... the terrible Ngambwali cannibals, and the horribleOokaballakonga head hunters! Also home to the jungle apeman... an apeman named...

59-AcrossScience Fiction Dept.: Night! A mighty, gleaming space-ship swoops gracefully out of thestarry sky making a gentle landing on the Nevada sands! Inside, Glarf Merfnick, Martian, sits,shaking and haggard from his escape from the...

34-AcrossCrime Dept.! All you out there who aspire to be criminals... You who follow the paths of evil!This story is for you!... The story of a fellow who dug his way into bank vaults... who dug hisway out of jails... and who wound up in the electric chair!... Fellow by the name of Melvin...

Back to Square One

Across1. Grassland6. See instructions12. Krystle’s nemesis, on an 80’s

soap14. Balkan nation16. Uttered memorized lines18. Russian reactionary19. Billy goat’s bleat20. Ran through22. Rapid transit?23. Cross inscription25. Part of the stage in front of the

proscenium26. “On Broadway” co-writer Cynthia27. Averages29. See instructions30. “Oliver ___” (2003 Fox comedy)31. Every mountain has one33. Brother-to-be34. See instructions35. Jacket part36. Eisenhower, and others39. Kept hidden43. “The Horse Whisperer” writer44. Lead pumper45. Shoe material46. Tall tales47. Turner and others49. Nest piece50. Cruella De ___51. Chinese puzzle53. Suffix with Capri54. Put on a pedestal56. Off base58. Something to turn over59. See instructions60. Kicks out61. Bridge positions

Down1. See instructions2. Mother of Richard I3. David Cornwell’s pseudonym4. Sixth-century year5. Small songbirds6. A derby might be held in one7. Lane’s colleague8. Book after Amos: Abbr.9. Sarcastic laugh10. Liqueur flavoring11. Sound of deflation, maybe13. ___ precedent15. Churchill contemporary17. Nymph loved by Apollo21. Jane’s role, in “Klute”24. Beatles song on “Let It Be”26. Cull28. Blackthorn fruits30. See instructions

32. Parisian pronoun33. ___ favor35. 1962 John Wayne film36. See instructions37. Shirked38. “Tamburlaine the Great”

playwright39. Dangle40. Starts from scratch, perhaps

41. Delete42. Sterilizes, say44. See instructions47. Piano virtuoso ___ Berman48. Performed, perhaps51. “___ yellow ribbon...”52. Feeding time sound55. Legal deg.57. Eggs

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

12 13 14 15

16 17 18

19 20 21 22

23 24 25 26

27 28 29 30

31 32 33

34 35

36 37 38 39 40 41 42

43 44 45

46 47 48 49

50 51 52 53

54 55 56 57

58 59

60 61

1 2

3

4 5 6

7

8 9

10

11

12

13

14

15

T he FinaleNow you’ve got nine five-letter words, one for each of the previous nine crossword puzzles. These nine

words can be placed into the blanks below. You can then transfer each set of letters to thedouble-cross grid, which if done correctly will spell out an appropriate quote by the Roman philosopher

Seneca, who was a really big fan of Mad.

But first, you’ll have to figure out which answer goes into which set of blanks. References to all ninepuzzles are shown in the crossword on the following page—place the answers to these puzzles in the

blanks in the same order as they appear in the grid. Answer, page 16.

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 15 35 3 12 42

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 37 14 23 16 4

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 38 9 19 31 41

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 6 29 36 39 44

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 7 26 30 1 43

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 20 25 34 33 2

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 32 24 28 22 17

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 11 40 8 10 5

____ ____ ____ ____ ____ 21 13 18 45 27

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

8 9 10 11 12 13 14

15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

23 24 25 26 27 28 29

30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37

38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45

T he Finale

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

19 20 21 22

23 24 25 26

27 28 29

30 31 32 33

34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42

43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51

52 53 54 55 56

57 58 59 60

61 62 63 64 65 66 67

68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77

78 79 80 81 82

83 84 85

86 87 88 89

90 91 92 93

Across1. Overly directed6. Honor12. Depot: Abbr.15. Word popularized during the

2000 presidential election19. Bush advisor Richard20. ___ del Fuego21. Part of a circle22. Leak cause23. Eskimo24. Horror-struck25. Fatherly27. The correct order, Part 130. Available31. First name in skin care32. Suffix meaning

“approximately”33. Dorm overseers, for short34. Like bad weather or bad

language36. Merchandise: Abbr.37. Coagulate39. Pack (down)43. Neighbor of Tenn.46. Tibetan monk48. Why precedes this?49. Judge52. The correct order, Part 257. Feline58. She’s a sister59. “The ___ Reader”60. Greek letters

61. Queens stadium62. Ado64. “It ___” (words of

identification)66. ___ es Salaam68. Not too smart71. Start of the 4th qtr.72. Like some stocks74. Malt kiln78. The correct order, Part 383. Pound prisoner84. Score again85. Be ill-mannered86. In awe87. Sun Devils’ sch.88. 14-Down, perhaps89. Orleans’s river90. Gets hitched91. That boat92. Jack Daniels alternative93. Pick up

Down1. ___ up (make stylish)2. Voice above baritone3. As ___ (usually)4. Paper airplane, for one5. Abominable Snowman6. French states7. Prop comedian’s specialty8. Tittered9. Clears away10. Start for while

11. Number arrays12. Early Greek lyric poet13. Disney World transport14. Guy on TV, often15. “The A.B.C. Murders” author16. Give an edge to17. “Oh well”18. N.J. neighbor26. Zsa Zsa’s sister28. East Coast airport29. Bermuda and Cancun35. Jai ___38. Stretched out40. Teeny tiny bit41. Computer program offering42. Chief exec.43. The basics44. Rachel’s sister, in the Bible45. Museo offering47. West and Clarke48. Buddhist discipline50. Produced no more51. La ___ Tar Pits53. Slang for dressy clothes54. Chilling55. Took care of56. Card63. Mother ___64. Single-file65. Musical composition67. Revolver, in old slang69. Odd ending70. Kind of touch

73. Copycats75. Actor John of “The Addams

Family”76. Boot attachments77. Melville tale78. Bank offering: Abbr.79. Baseball superstar, for short80. Have a snack81. Same: Fr.82. Kilmer and others83. Trite saying