April 2015 - South Jersey MOM Magazine

april 2015

FrEE

Girls Battling the

Unrealistic Beauty

Standard

new mom'S

nurSInG tIPSyou haven't heard

5BenefItSof camPyou may not know

homeand

GardenSpecialSection

understanding the signs of autISm

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www.southjerseymom.com April 2015 | 3

ContentsAPRIL 2015

Home & Garden Guide

mom 2 mom

8 Celebrate Earth Day– Family Style

moms R women 2

10 Breastfeeding: Notes From A Real Mom

12 Selective Mutism– What Is It?

know 2 grow

18 The Month Of April Is Learning About Autism

20 To Game, Or Not To Game; That is The Question

21 Dying To Be Thin– The Truth About Girls And Eating Disorders

also in this issue

5 Some of My Faves

17 Ask The Expert

22 Thinking Outside The Shell–Our Top Ten Nut Butter Spreads

features

“Like” South Jersey MOM magazine on Facebook and find out about local events, win prizes and connect with other moms in the area! www.facebook.com/SouthJerseyMOM

23 Business Spotlight: YMCA Camps

24 Summer Camp Guide


You never know what you can find in the earth. Yep, down there in the dirt! So, as Earth Day ap-

proaches, encourage the kids to find a spot, and with your guidance, dig in the dirt to uncover treasures. They may find stones, little pieces of sticks. They may find lost items like buttons or pennies. Maybe a worm! Their hands can be their shovels or get them some real garden shovels to do their exploring. Perhaps, at the dollar store you can purchase a pair of child-size gardening gloves or little

rakes and spades. Props add to the fun. Helping your kids get close to nature is always a gift and going in the woods together to explore can be a real adven-ture. Just remind them, to replace the earth after their exploration so there ar-en’t holes in the ground and no one falls.Green Hearts, Institute for Nature in Childhood is a real advocate for bring-ing the kids back to nature and on Earth Day, what a perfect time to send this re-minder!

South JerseyApril MOM 2015

CEO/PublishEr Christopher Ognibene • (609) 670-1794

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ExECutivE EditOr Karen Ognibene • (609) 230-6280

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MarkEting & businEss dEvElOPMEnt sPECialist

Michelle Scianni • (856) 986-9606 [email protected]

FOr gEnEral advErtising inquiriEs Marissa Josephick • (856) 537-7089

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Monica Farren • (215) 520-6486 [email protected]

Megan Battaglia • (267) 981-1603 [email protected]

PrOduCtiOn ManagEr Lisa Celfo

[email protected]

businEss dEvElOPMEnt intErn Michael Ahearn

COntributing WritErs Michael Ahearn, Angela DeGroot, Sharla Feldshcher, Brie Latini, Jess Michaels, Kelly N. Moore, Psy.D.,

Cherly Lynn Potter, Tara Pyfrin, MB Sanok, Erin Taylor

sPECial thanks tO MJ Kidz

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subMit CalEndar listing [email protected]

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Every month South Jersey MOM features a local child on the cover. If you think you have the “Cutest Kid in Town”, send a 4x6 photo to South Jersey MOM. P.O. Box 268, Wenonah, NJ 08090.

On back of photo write child’s name and age along with guardian contact info.

Not only a South Jersey Mom, Sharla Feldscheris a proud South Jersey Grandmom (Grammy, as she prefers to becalled). The author of six books on creative ideas to do with young children, including two KIDFUN Activity Books published by HarperCollins, she has a blog at www.kidfunandmore.com with more easy-to-do KIDFUN ideas. Sharla has her own public relations business in Philadelphia. A real kid-believer, she began her career as the first PR Director of the Please Touch Museum and started her own business with Sesame Place as her first account, representing the park for 26 years.

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Karen [email protected]

We were working on this issue during a particularly cold stretch of February and March- if I heard snowstorm one more time I was going

to permanently hibernate. Just thinking about all things spring-cleaning up the yard and starting the home and garden projects (see “Home and Garden Guide” page 14) and start thinking about summer camp and the open houses you can attend to learn the offerings of local camps (see “Summer Camp Guide” page 24). If you’re tired of egg salad by the middle of April spruce up lunchtime (we offer great nut butter tips in “Thinking Outside The Shell-Our Top Ten Nut butter Spreads” page 22). But the story that resonates the most with me was “A Conscious Approach To Youth Sports” (page 6), since my youngest has never been fond of

playing organized sports. We tried all the usual parenting tricks that we had up our sleeve to motivate, persuade and lastly bribe. None of the above mentioned tactics worked and we finally asked ourselves was this our dream or hers. Often, we feel that we have to push our kids because great success stories can come out of it, but the unfortunate stories of resenting parents for being pushed too hard are also the counter balance. We had big dreams to cheer her on at soccer and basketball games we thought this is a parental right, or maybe not. Her friend’s father, the soccer coach for her age group, still tells her periodically that he could use her on the team. But, she always declines gracefully. Having an older athletic child that played up to three sports a season certainly helped fulfill our sideline dreams. The older child was always ready and waiting at the door to go to games and practices, it’s something he really wanted in his life. We had to look at ourselves and our younger child and take inventory of what was important and decided to allow her to honor her own path. The deal is that she plays tennis and walks/runs on the treadmill in the basement to stay active. The result is less arguing, no tears and we’re all much happier. Happy spring sports or not…Your friend & fellow MOM,

some of my faveS

a letter from the eDITOR

In children with eczema the smallest seasonal springtime allergy can inflame their eczema. When the body is already

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Katelyn is 5 years old and has a huge imagi-nation. She loves to dress up, draw and play with her little sister. Katelyn’s favorite thing about camp is making new friends.

on the COveR

Charlee is an outgoing, creative little 5 year old who simply loves going to summer camp. Science, art and imaginative play are some of Charlee’s favorite activities.


A Conscious Approach to Youth Sports Erin Taylor, MA

This was a weekend full of sports in my family. My 12 year old had a basketball game and my 7 year old had a soccer

game and swim meet. As Rachel Macy Staf-ford says, I love to watch my children play. I have grown so much from the days when my 12 year old was just getting into sports – when my ego came roaring out to the field, the court, the pool – and I wanted him to excel at all costs. Regardless of his reasons for joining a team or for playing a sport (uh, maybe because he enjoyed playing?), he was a big kid and I wanted him to dominate. As you can imagine, this lead to many, many negative, disconnect-ing interactions between him and me. I cringe at the thought of them, but I am also aware enough to give myself some slack and appre-ciate how much I have grown and as a result, how awesome our relationship is now. Now, three kids later, I am a wholly dif-ferent parent watching my kids play their vari-ous sports. On Saturday, my 7 year old played in his indoor soccer game. He is reluctant to try new things and he had never played indoor before this season, so it was already a huge ac-complishment just getting him onto the court and willing to play the very first game. He is not the shining star on the team by a long shot. In fact, in four years of playing soccer, he had never scored a goal. Until this weekend. The past few weeks, Brady has been get-ting more and more into playing in the games. At the beginning of the season, his coach would try to put him in the game and he would respectfully decline. Knowing him the way I do, I know he is slow to warm up in situations with which he is unfamiliar. It took intention-ality and awareness on my part not to push him according to my own agenda. Being ful-ly aware of not letting my ego do the talking, from time to time I would gently wonder out

loud if games would be more enjoyable for him if he decided to play when his coach wanted to put him in. Slowly, he began first agreeing to play when asked and then actually asking to be put in. In this weekend’s game, he was the most into it I have ever seen him. He was going af-ter the ball and even took a few shots on goal, missing each time. One time, he took a shot that barely skimmed by the edge of the goal – the closest he has ever come. He turned around and for a split second I saw this confident smile spread across his face and disappear just as quickly. It was in that instant that I knew this would be the game he would score his first goal. I literally saw the spark of confidence as his young brain made the connection. It was only about five minutes later when he took his next shot and scored! As the team parents on the bleachers erupted into frenzied applause for my little guy, Brady quietly and confidently walked back to mid court to start the next play; a player who was out there just doing his job. I was filled with gratitude for the growth I saw in him before my eyes. Several of the parents from the team came

up to me during and after the game to comment on how well Brady had played. I appreciated their noticing his improvement that day, but I was very mindful not to let their supportive and enthusiastic comments get to my own head and bring my ego roaring back to the sidelines. This was about Brady’s growth after all, not about my egoic agenda. Sports are such a golden opportunity for us to build connection with our children, to support them in gaining confidence and dis-covering and becoming who they are meant to be, in their own time frame. But too often we come to our children’s sports fully enshroud-ed in our egos and our own agendas, and that golden opportunity we have before us is wast-ed, slipping through our fingers like grains of sand. My little guy may never be a star soccer player, but you know what? It does not matter, not one little bit. I have no expectations of him getting a soccer scholarship or playing in the pros. All I want is for him to play the game for as long as he is interested in playing at whatev-er level he is capable of, to always put forth his best effort, to walk off the field feeling good about how he played, and to learn more about himself along the way. See how much different that is than when my own egoic agenda lead the way with my older son? I had a lot of repair work to do on my relationship with my old-er son, but as with most of us parents, I have grown as much if not more than my children, and I am a different, more conscious parent these days. As I support my children to grow up, they in turn help me to grow up.✲Erin Taylor, MA is a wife, therapist, writer, parent coach and mom to four children ages 7, 9 and 12. Her oldest daughter died of a heart defect as a baby. It Takes A Village Parent Coaching is a source of inspira-tion for her work, and you can reach her at [email protected].

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Earth Day is an annual reminder to take stock of how our habits affect our environment. Celebrate by dedicating the day to appreciating and protecting our planet – family

style.Wear it: turn your family out in Earth Day fashion with homemade eco-fact t-shirts or simply wear green and brown to show your Earth Day colors. Repurpose old t-shirts with iron-on transfers or fabric paint to get your Earth Day message across. Make badges – April 22nd is the 45th anniversary of Earth Day.plant it: grab the gardening tools and spend the day in the dirt. Check with your municipality for areas that could do with a makeover. Plant indigenous wildflowers and trees because these help attract native birds, pollinators and mammals. Planting trees prevents soil erosion and helps reduce pollution. Create a community garden for the whole neighborhood to enjoy.Walk it: challenge your friends and family to a hike in honor of Earth Day. Brendan Byrne State Forest (Rt. 70, New Lisbon) has many trails to choose from and at Pakim Pond the kids can look for frogs and turtles while the adults soak in the tranquil outdoors. http://www.state.nj.us/dep/parksandforests/parks/byrne.html. Make your own eco-friendly snacks using locally grown veggies or homemade trail mix to enjoy along the way SWap it: rather than trashing the items your family no longer uses, organize a neighborhood swap meet. Kids can trade old toys, video games, movies, books and clothing.WatCH it: enjoy an Earth Day twist on Family Movie Night with organic popcorn and films like Disneynature:Earth (G), The Whale (G), The Cove (PG13) or March of the Penguins (G).piCk it up: removing trash from a local beach or forest is a great way for your family to contribute to the community while honoring the spirit of Earth Day. Make sure you are properly outfitted, including gloves

and litter prongs. Take care when handling items like broken glass and syringes, and beware of disturbing animals and insects roosting in the rubbish.SWitCH it: instead of disposable water bottles and coffee cups, consider switching to reusable sports bottles and mugs. Do the math – how many are you trashing in a day? Now multiply that by 365 and see what a difference using a mug or sports bottle can make in a year.keep it up: incorporate a little Earth Day passion into your everyday life–small habits can bring about big changes.✲

Celebrate Earth Day–Family StyleBy Angela De Groot

SupplieS:• Rotisserie chicken container• Pea or aquarium gravel• Charcoal• Potting soil• Small, slow growing plants like

ferns, mosses, African Violets, Baby’s Tears, Strawberry Begonia

• Decorative items such as river stones and knick-knacks

StepS:• Thoroughly wash and dry the container.• Cover the bottom with a ½-inch layer of gravel.• Add a thin layer of charcoal. This helps to keep the soil

fresh.• Place a few inches of damp (not soggy) potting soil on

top of the charcoal layer.• Carefully insert your plants into the soil. Trim if

necessary.• Arrange your decorative items to complete your

landscape.• With a spray bottle, gently mist the plants, then snap

the lid into place.• Situate the terrarium in a well-lit spot in your home,

out of direct sun-light.• Water as required, but do not allow the soil too wet.• If too much condensation builds up, remove the lid

until the moisture evaporates.

Take-Out Terrarium By Angela De Groot



When we found out I was pregnant with my son, I knew imme-diately that we would choose breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics, and

widely considered the “best” feeding choice for infants and toddlers. There would be a minimal amount of bottles to fill, wash, and pack. As long as my body cooperated, we would never run out, eliminating the need for a late-night run to the store for formula. Happily, we were able to nurse successfully, but it was a tough start while we both tried to figure out what we were doing! During that time, I reached out to anyone I could for advice, and found that the most useful information came from other nursing mothers. Here’s a list of the ten best tips I received:

w Watch out for flailing baby hands because if one of those flying fists of death happens to get a grip on your milky bits, it will bring tears to your eyes! Try looking online for nursing or teething jewelry, which can help keep the hands of your little one occupied while you nurse.

w If you plan of going back to work and do not want to wean your little one, speak with your employer before you go out on maternity leave. Make sure there are clear expectations concerning how often you will need a break to pump, if there is a place to store your collected breast milk, and if there is a clean, comfortable, private place to pump. “The Milk Memos” by Cate Colburn-Smith and Andrea Serrette is a fantas-tic read for any working, breastfeeding mama!

w Speaking of pumping, if you plan on utilizing a breast pump, do some research. If you only plan on pumping occasionally, you may not need the same heavy-duty pump as someone who will pump several times a day. Read reviews, ask other nursing mothers, and choose a pump based on your needs. This may not be the trendiest or most expensive pump.

w If you can, invest in a few good nursing bras and tanks. I tried to be cheap and buy the inexpensive ones. It did not turn our well. Quality pieces will last the duration of your breastfeeding experience and can even be passed on to another mom after!

w When you have a newborn, everyone wants to help! If you are lucky enough to be surrounded by friends and family who can offer an extra set of hands, take them up on it! As a nursing mother, all of the feeding will be in your hands (…and boobs). Take your breaks when you can get them.

w Enjoy the time with your baby while you are nursing. It is an oppor-tunity to bond and to be close to your infant uninterrupted. That said, sometimes it can be a little lonely to spend time with someone who doesn’t speak. You will spend a lot of time nursing, and a lot of time bonding. It’s okay to use some of the time to catch up on your DVR’ed episodes of “Scandal” or read a book.

w While you are still in the hospital, utilize the services of a lactation consultant, and ask for a list of support services to use when you are home. Consider joining the La Leche League, an organization that promotes breast feeding and offers support to nursing mothers.

w Be sure to take care of yourself. Keeping another human alive with your body is serious work. Do your best to eat well, stay hydrated, and be rested.

w My last bit of advice is the most important- try to stay relaxed! While I was pregnant, I stressed myself out, worrying that breast feeding might not work out. I was very lucky- after a few days, my son and I took to nursing like champs. But, had it not worked out, I would have been upset. It can be so easy to lose your mind trying to be a “perfect” mother, but is a mother who nurses better than a mother who formula feeds? Nope. Feeding your baby in a manner that works for you and leaves your baby full and healthy is the most important thing. There are any number of great choice to make when it comes to raising your children. Pick the ones that work and go!✲

mom

s R

wom

en 2 Breastfeeding:

Notes From a real momBy Brie Latini


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Connor was the blonde-haired, blue-eyed, assertive, outgoing four-year old angel who entered our lives and started our family. He was very inquisitive, asking questions and re-programming our

desktops with his own passwords. He would boss his little brother around giving him orders and telling him how to complete a certain task. Connor was able to read, identify sight words, and knew his address, telephone number, and age, before entering Pre-School. I knew academically he would do well and was ready to begin school. I will never forget when his teacher called me to tell me she thought there was something wrong. She informed me that Connor does not so-cialize with the other children and never raises his hand to answer ques-tions. She also informed me that during circle time Connor had difficulty focusing and was often looking out the window rather than participating in the activities. She said, “I don’t think he understands what is going on in the classroom. He cannot identify his letters or numbers.” As an educator I was baffled by this news. Did she have the right child? Connor, I thought, Not my Connor, Really? One day I went to observe him in the classroom from afar. She was right. Connor seemed frightened. At center time he was staring at the other children and seemed very lonely. My heart broke for this child who seemed like a stranger to me. What was going on? That was the beginning of our quest to find answers. I started to take him to Speech Therapists, Neurologists, and Psychiatrists. My schedule

was booked with doctor appointments. Each time I left one appointment I was more confused than when I entered. It wasn’t until I took him to a private clinic and a Doctor there told me my son had Selective Mutism. According to the American Psychiatric Association (2000) Selective Mutism (SM) is a disorder in which a child can speak well in a familiar setting however, does not speak in social situations which are expected. The symptoms must last at least a month to be diagnosed. Children are often diagnosed with the disorder between the ages of three to five years of age. Selective Mutism occurs in less than 1% of the United States population. As a result of these statistics often times SM is mistaken for Autism or ADHD. Characteristics of a Selective Mute child are exhibited in a variety of ways. Some children have a fear of social embarrassment, excessive shyness, social isolation, withdrawal, compulsive traits, temper tantrums, controlling and oppositional behavior (Hungerford, Edwards, & Iantosca, 2003; Krysanski, 2003). SM is an anxiety, therefore children with the disorder have limited eye contact when speaking or listening to others speak. According to Dr. Shipon – Blum from the Selective Mutism Anx-iety Research and Treatment Center (SMART Center) “Each child is at a different stage of a Social Communication Bridge. Some children are completely non-communicative, while others are mute but can commu-nicate nonverbally with gestures and nods.” Researchers have suggested there are many different causes of Selective Mutism such as early devel-opmental factors, family dynamics, unresolved internal conflicts, genet-ics, and hospitalization or trauma.

Selective Mutism can be treated through a Behavior Modification Approach and or Medicine. In a Reinforcement Approach positive re-wards and praise are given when children complete tasks by communicat-ing with others. It is not recommended to “punish” a child when the tasks are not completed because this increases anxiety. Sometimes Selective Mutism can be treated with Prozac to reduce anxiety levels and begin communication. Treatment is highly recommended because the disorder does not go away on its own. As for Connor, he is ten years old, an honor student, who plays the piano and active in Cub Scouts. He speaks at school and plays with the children not beside the children. His computer is always by his side and his little brother is still his best friend. Although he has made significant progress he has a long way to go but I am confident with the help of the school, family and friends he will get there.✲

Selective Mutism – What Is It?Tara Twente Pyfrin MA, M.Ed

Each child is at a different stage of a Social Communication

Bridge. Some children are completely non-communicative,

while others are mute but can communicate nonverbally with

gestures and nods.



Home & Garden Guide

Get great ideas from our Home & Garden section to spruce up your home and

garden for spring. around the house it’s time to get rid of winter excess that’s piled up in the closets and drawers. If your budget doesn’t allow a kitchen make-over paint the cabinets or turn a door into a chalkboard for the kids to draw on. Grab a rake and head outdoors to start cleaning up the yard. make it fun family time when everyone pitches in & grabs a rake. Parents you can make a fun game out of picking up sticks and debris.


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Ask the ExpertJodi Schechtman MA-CCC-SLP Speech Language Pathologist MJ KIDZ [email protected] 609-923-3372

A: It is a burning question on the minds of many parents not only because it is crucial to know as soon as possible, but also because the need for it presents itself differently at every age. For younger children, if they are having problems with joint attention, looking at the person they are talking to, initiating an interaction, showing interest in others, taking turns, or sharing a social skills group may be necessary. As children get older, however, their social skills need to progress as well. In addition to all the above, older children that have problems with perspective taking appropriately commenting on a topic, changing topics in a socially acceptable manner and joining a conversation may find that

they would benefit from a social skills group. Eventually, if these steps are not nurtured or expanded upon, poor social problem solving becomes apparent and social isolation can occur. Social skills can interfere with academic performance if children are unable to understand teachers’ perspectives in the classroom environment and unable to work with peers in a group. Therefore, if difficulty on any of these levels occurs it is important to consider social skills instruction by a highly trained professional who is able to target individualized goals.✲

Q: How do I know if my child needs a social skills group?

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know

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April is National Autism Awareness Month. Autism affects one out of ev-ery 68 children in the United States.

That number has steadily been increasing for the past 20 years. The reason why, is unclear. Some research studies suggest better reporting and detection may be the answer. While others suggest, the answer could be improved diag-nosis and environmental factors. Right now, no one knows the correct answer. One thing is clear; autism is one of the fastest-growing developmental disability in the United States. It’s also more common among boys than girls. Boys are four to five times more likely than girls to have autism. Statistics show one in every 42 boys, compared to one in every 189 girls, will have a diagnosis of autism in the United States. Autism affects the normal development of the brain, particularly in areas of social inter-

action, communication skills, cognitive func-tion and repetitive behaviors. Individuals with autism usually have difficulties in verbal and non-verbal communication, social interactions and leisure or play activities. Some children with autism appear typi-cally developing before one or 2 years of age, and then suddenly regress and lose language or social skills they had previously gained. This phenomenon is called the regressive type of autism. Forty percent of children with autism do not speak. Another 25 to 30 percent have words at 12 to 18 months of age and then lose them. Others might speak, but not until later on in childhood. No one with autism is alike. This disorder varies from person to person. It can also be very mild, to being very severe. Autism can also occur in all ethnic and socio-economic backgrounds, as well as in all age

groups. There’s no cure for autism and there’s no medical test to help diagnose the disorder. Recent studies suggest appropriate screening can help to determine if a child is at risk for autism, as young as one year of age. The American Psychiatric Association recently defined autism under the heading of Autism Spectrum Disorder. Other autism dis-orders were also included under that heading, as well. Previously, these disorders were all recognized under their own separate catego-ries. These disorders include Autism, Asperger Syndrome, Childhood Disintegrative Disorder and Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified. Autism Spectrum Disor-der affects over 3 million people in the United States and tens of millions of people world-wide. It’s important for parents and guardians to recognize the early signs of autism and seek early intervention services that can help improve learning, communication and social skills in young children. Autism offers many symptoms, such as, not having your child make eye contact or they don’t smile, when smiled at. They also don’t respond to their name, or to the sound of a familiar voice and they don’t make noises to get your attention. It’s important for parents and guardians to join a support group, so they will not think they’re alone when dealing with autism. Faces 4 Autism, is a support group in Atlantic Coun-ty, that has a lot of people to talk to about the disorder, said Isabelle Mosca, the organiza-tion’s Founder and Executive Director. The group was founded by the Mosca Family, back in April of 2002, after their son Kyle was diagnosed with Pervasive Develop-mental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified. The Mosca’s were interested in learning more about the disorder, as well as meeting oth-er families facing the same diagnosis. Today, the group has about 500 families who are all dealing with autism or one of the other autism disorders, said Mosca. Parents of autistic children should nev-er give up on their dreams for their kids, said Mosca. ”They should dream new dreams for their kids, because they can accomplish so many wonderful things.”✲For More Information: Faces4Autisim (609) 412-3750, www.faces4autism.org

The Month of April is Learning about Autism By Cheryl Lynne Potter


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Let’s be frank. You come home from run-ning errands, and your kids are exactly where you left them: lounging on the

couch playing video games. You worry. You quickly assume they have been wasting their time and that they would be much better off reading a book, building with Legos, or just going outside. But maybe video games ar-en’t the waste of time we think they are. New research has begun to show that a little bit of gaming can actually be good for your child’s cognitive, creative, and social development. According to a recent NPR article, video games can have a positive impact on the de-velopment of a child’s brain. The research sug-gests that children who play video games have better attention, speed, accuracy, vision, and focus than those who do not game. One study in particular shows that games especially ben-efit girls, aiding in the development of men-tal skills necessary for careers in mathematics and engineering. What does this mean for your kids? It means that the video games they play can help them process new information more

quickly. They can also help them strengthen their ability to multitask and to increase their capacity to experience and process the world around them. Gaming can even change the way your kids use their brains, making them more efficient at complex tasks. Videos games have also be tied to cre-ativity, according to a Michigan State study. After testing children who were gamers and non-gamers, they found that those who played video games were more likely to be creative in creating stories and drawing pictures. This was also found to be unique to video games; no oth-er form of technology was shown to increase the creativity of the children’s responses. This means that video games can help your children think outside of the box. They can gain abili-ties not only in creative pursuits, like writing, drawing, or other forms of art, but also learn to apply that ability to other problems that face them, whether it is professional or personal. The games they play can inspire them to take the path less traveled, or to even create their own, new one.

Research also shows that there can be a social benefit to playing video games. Accord-ing to a recent study published in the journal Pediatrics and reported on by CBS News play-ing video games can be beneficial to a child’s sociability and overall happiness. What mat-ters most is the length of time a child spends in front of the screen. Keep it to an hour a day, and your child is likely to be more satisfied with life, bonding easily with friends and dis-playing less hyperactivity than those in other groups. Moreover, initiating interactions with peers come easier to kids who game than to those who do not, as does absorbing informa-tion in the classroom. So, the next time you arrive home after hours of running errands and find your children still immersed in their video games, don’t wor-ry; they are building skills that they will use for the rest of their lives. As long as they are enjoy-ing their fun in moderation, the virtual worlds to which they escape can help them in the real world they share with you.✲

To Game, or Not To Game; That is the Question

by Michael Ahearn


Turn on any television program, open up a magazine, or watch a music video, and you are bound to see something very similar: images of women and men as predominately good-looking, thin

and/or muscular, and advertisements with the latest dieting or exercise craze. Over the past decade, the American ideal beauty standard of white, thin, and blond, has continued to be challenged by celebrities in the public eye that have embraced a more realistic body shape that is typical of most women and men in the everyday world. Meghan Trainor’s popular 2014 hit “All About that Bass” is not referring to the booming sound coming through your speakers, but rather a tribute and a plea for women to love their curves and recognize that the PhotoShop images that we see in the magazines aren’t real either, nor should it be our life’s goal. So why then are we still hearing so much about our young girls and boys making desperate attempts to be thinner, muscular, and assume the image of their favorite celebrity du jour? According to the National Asso-ciation of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, over one-half of teenage girls and one-third of teenage boys employ unhealthy methods to control their weight. These strategies include fasting for non-religious reasons, smoking cigarettes, skipping meals, and even taking laxatives. There is also plenty of research that has found that young girls (as young as 3rd graders!) indicate a desire to be thinner and have a fear of becom-ing fat! Many of these desires and fears are derived from the images that they see on television. And it’s not just our young girls that are at risk. Boys can also be vulnerable and go to great lengths to achieve a body image ideal. According to research, 10-15% of those who suffer from an-orexia nervosa are men. These disorders, if not addressed, can result in lifelong health problems, and even worse, death. The desire to be a reflection of an unrealistic beauty standard is not just a phase that should be overlooked. It is sometimes rooted in other issues related to an overwhelming drive towards perfection, low self-es-teem, compulsiveness, and a tendency towards depression when high ex-pectations are not met. So here are some things that we as moms, aunts, sisters, and friends need to be aware of:SiGnS & SymptomS oF eatinG diSorderS: Visit sites like the Na-tional Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders (www.anad.org) and The National Eating Disorders Association (www.natio-naleatingdisorders.org) or do other web searches to know the different types of eating disorders, their symptoms, and how to get help for your family. Eating disorders are rarely about food; typically there are other factors involved that drive a person to develop these behaviors. If you notice that your child is refusing food, preoccupied with calorie counting, exercising excessively and becomes distressed if the routine is disrupted, purging food, etc., it may be time to intervene before things get out of hand. riSk FaCtorS: Children in sports that require individual judgment (as opposed to refereed sports) or have a specific weight threshold attached to them can be a major risk factor. If your child is involved in sports like gymnastics, wrestling, ballet, etc., pay close attention to their mood and eating behaviors. You don’t want to become the food police, but you don’t

want to turn a blind eye either. Individuals with these problem behaviors may often be very secretive about it, but if you pay close attention, you will start to recognize patterns that may be a red flag.Set tHe example: While the media plays a huge role in influencing our children, we are also a huge influence as well! Watch the “I’m so fat” talk around your children. It is great if you maintain a healthy and fit lifestyle. However, if you are overly concerned with the numbers on the scale or on the back of your granola bar package, you are modeling for your child these same behaviors. Remember, the message that we want to send our kids is NOT to focus on size, but to focus on health, embracing their bodies and taking good care of it.✲

Dying To Be Thin: Battling the Unrealistic Beauty Standard

By: Kelly N. Moore, Psy.D.

http://www.anad.org

http://www.anad.org

http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org

http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org


1. once again creamy almond Butter Calories: 190 fat: 17 grams, sugar: 2 grams, Protein: 7 grams With the same creamy texture of peanut butter, but without the hydrogenated oil, almond butter is a great place to start eating healthy. While there are many different types of good almond butter brands to choose from, we love Once again because of it’s use of only one ingredient: roasted almonds.

2. I.m healthy original creamy Soynut Butter Calories: 170 fat: 11 grams, sugar: 3 grams, Protein: 7 grams i.M. Healthy’s soynut butter provides an excellent way for anyone who has a tree nut or peanut butter allergies to enjoy the taste and texture of nut butter. although i.M. Healthy offers a delicious spread, newcomers should be ready for it to seem a little grainy. that happens when there is a lack added oils in your product.

3. Sunbutter creamy: Sunflower Seed Spread Calories: 200 fat: 16 grams, sugar: 3 grams, Protein: 7 grams sunflower seed spread is another option for anyone who suffers from a tree nut allergy. this smooth concoction, besides being tasty, also offers a vitamin boost, including fiber, magnesium, nia-cin, and vitamin e.

4. once again organic Sesame tahini Calories: 180 fat: 17 grams, sugar: 0 grams, Protein: 6 grams not only does this seed spread not have added sugar, it has no sugar at all! While some need a period of adjustment to get used to the lack of added sugar, this incredibly creamy spread offers an alternative for people looking to cut out sugar. and, because it is Once again, the only ingredient is sesame sees.

5. artisana organic cashew nut Butter Calories: 183 fat: 15 grams, sugar: 1.9 grams, Protein: 6 grams Besides having the benefits of being a raw, organ-ic product, this sweet treat, while a little low on the protein, packs a great amount of flavor. some may prefer to make it at home using a food processor, but for us, we prefer the convenience and the raw, organic nature of artisana’s Cashew nut Butter.

6. Smucker’s natural creamy Peanut Butter Calories: 200 fat: 16 grams, sugar: 1 gram, Protein: 7 grams the best place to look for natural creamy peanut butter is on labels that have only peanuts as an ingredient, and this is exactly with smucker’s offers. With the classic peanut butter taste paired with no hydrogenated oil and preservatives, this is a great place for any peanut-butter lover to start going natural.

7. wilderness Poets raw Pistachio butter Calories: 156 fat: 12 grams, sugar: 2 grams, Protein: 6 grams a perfect option for those who love pistachios, yet tire of having to open every shell. this rich, earthy, and pleasantly bitter spread offer way for the pis-tachio expert to learn to love the nut all over again with this raw spread.

8. Smart Balance creamy Peanut Butter and omega-3s Calories: 190 fat: 15 grams, sugar: 3 grams, Protein: 7 grams Personally, when i go for peanut butter, i usually reach for this. With Omega-3s from flaxseed Oil and zero trans fat, this peanut butter offers some-thing that your traditional peanut butter lacks and offers it all with a great taste.

9. the original: Jif creamy Peanut Butter Calories: 190 fat: 16 grams, sugars: 3 grams, Protein: 7 grams it is the classic peanut butter that has been around for over fifty years. it is not the healthiest spread on this list, and can also causes problems with the amount of peanut-allergies. Yet, sometimes all you want is a creamy taste of nostalgia.

10. dessert: nutella hazelnut Spread Calories: 200 fat: 12 grams, sugar: 21 grams, Protein: 2 grams not every nut spread that has been rising up in popularity has been diet-friendly, but that’s okay. sometimes, a dessert is all right, and no one dominates the desert nut spread quite like nutella. While high in sugar, it is fine in moderation, so learn to savor this hazelnut delight from time to time.

By Michael ahearn

We are going nuts for nut-spreads! From 2008 to 2013, according to a 2014 Mintel Global market research report, the sales of nut-based and sweet spreads grew by 34%, and while peanut butter is still king, other nut and seed butters are making their presence known. With all the different options available, it is time to explore all the creamy delights available. To help, look at some of our favorite jelly-mates below.

Thinking Outside the Shell: Our Top Ten Nut Spreads


business spotlight

Before you scramble to find the right summer camp, stop and check out YMCA Camps Ockanickon, Matol-

lionequay and Lake Stockwell Day Camp. With the YMCA’s tried-and-true reputation as a summer camp leader for over a cen-tury, you won’t be disappointed with their mix of tradition and innovation in the programs they offer and values they share. Your child’s needs and hopes for a fantastic summer will be met with activi-ties to stimulate their senses while teach-ing them life lessons. For every activ-ity YMCA campers participate in, the staff seamlessly incorporates the four-core values they hold dear including respect, responsibility, honesty and car-ing. Located on 800 acres of the Pine Barrens in Medford, the site utilizes the lakes, trails and forested areas to their advantage. Of-fering fun activities like swimming, canoeing and kayaking, archery, creative arts, a nature center, high and low ropes challenge courses and outdoor activities, they’re bound to make lasting memories. Camp Ockanickon caters to boys, ages 7-16; Camp Matollionequay is tai-lor-made for girls, ages 7-16. Both are over-night camps. Lake Stockwell Day Camp, ages 3-15, provides great options for campers who are ready to go home at day’s end but still want the perks of summer camp. Half-day sessions are available for preschoolers. Starting at age 12, specialty programs like Explorers/Explor-ers Plus Program in Day Camp and the Ranger Programs in Overnight Camp are for kids who desire exciting field trips and wilderness ad-ventures that test their mettle. To find out what’s new, Camp Ockan-ickon’s Director Brent Birchler described last summer’s success in introducing log rolling to campers and also their Rocks and Rafts Ranger Program which includes rafting, rock climbing, and rappelling. He also noted that the camp is

building more GAGA courts, a favored activ-ity among campers. New lake inflatables will make their appearance this summer, too. For Camp Matollionequay, Camp Director Gabri-elle Ostroski revealed that a hammock village

hangout is being constructed for girl campers.

But how do the YMCA camps com-

pare with other similar camps?

It begins with thorough train-ing of their staff who use role modeling as an effective tool in helping campers to

adjust to camp and appreciate

the importance of their core values.

Gabrielle says, “[It’s im-portant] in the way you speak

to campers as a counselor. [You’re] helping to build self-esteem in each other.” Brent agrees, “[Our] staff is our biggest asset to deliver the program, connect with and be there for the kids.” Since many staff members have been both campers and counselors, they’re knowledge-able and experienced role models who remem-ber the challenges of growing up. According to Brent, in the camp setting, campers are able to learn and practice skills that aren’t typically taught in school, especially regarding making and keeping friends, navigating social situa-tions, developing a sense of independence and being a part of something bigger than yourself. “[They] supplement what they’ve learned out-side of camp with experiences they’ve gained here. However, since the overnight camps are not co-ed, pressure to impress the opposite sex is not an issue. Another key to their success is in the “balance between structure and choice” in the range and scheduling of activities they offer. “By scheduling our activities based on age and grade, our campers spend the vast majority of

their time with other campers from their age group. This allows them to develop friendships while participat-ing in fun, age-appropriate, and chal-lenging activities,” Brent explains. Mornings are more routine-oriented where skills are taught and practiced, but afternoons leave time to choose activities they like and to enjoy free play. In celebration of the abun-dance of activities, the camps are tech-free. Brent says,” [They] get face-to-face interaction [which] helps build patience and collaboration skills. Camp is one of the few opportunities many young people get to unplug and enjoy being outdoors for an extended period of time.” Since many choices exist in the summer camp selection for your child, one way to ease reluctant or new campers into the process is to “involve kids in the decision.” That way they have “ownership over the camp experience,” explains Brent. He also suggests visiting the camp ahead of time and meeting the staff. This gives them something to look forward to and “visually preps” them for the experience. So before making the all-important deci-sion about camp, be sure to stop and check out YMCA Camps Ockanickon, Matollionequay and Lake Stockwell Day Camp in Medford. You won’t be disappointed in the options and affordability available to you. Visit their web-site, http://ycamp.org , for a complete list of ac-tivities, schedules and registration or call (800) 442-CAMP (2267) for more information.✲

Stop Your Summer Camp Search at YMCA Camps Ockanickon, Matollionequay, and

Lake Stockwell Day CampBy MB Sanok

http://ycamp.org


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For over 150 years, children have enjoyed summers at camp trying new activities like boating, hiking, swimming and

gymnastics. What some families may not realize is that camp provides children with important life skills that are difficult to achieve in any other environment. Here are just five of the many benefits your children will gain from going to day or sleepaway camp.

Camp promotes confidence–Camp pro-vides children with many opportunities to build confidence. At camp, children are try-ing new activities and when they succeed, they feel good about themselves. They also gain confidence by making their own decisions and trusting their own instincts. When children go to day or sleepaway camp, they are also given the opportunity to grow more independent. Their par-ents aren’t there to text or ask a question to. They have to learn to rely on themselves and other trusted adults at camp to figuare out a situation. Separation from parents gives a child the ability to think independently which builds self-esteem and confidence. Ameri-can Camp Association research has found that 92% of campers said that camp helped them feel good about themselves and 70% of parents report-ed that their child gained self-confidence at camp.

Children gain important life skills needed to become success-ful adults. At camp, children are gaining skills that can’t possibly be learned in the school setting. In fact, an organization called The Partner-ship for 21st Century Skills made up of a group of businesses, education leaders, and policymakers including the U.S Department of Education, AOL Time Warner Foundation, Apple Computer, Inc., Cisco Systems, Inc. and others, has found there is a large gap between the knowledge students learn in school and the skills they need to be successful in the 21st century. After extensive research, they found that some of the skills necessary to become successful adults are communication, collaboration, creativity, leadership, social skills and problem solving – all skills that are fostered in the camp environment. Camp offers many opportunities for children to utilize these skills. Campers are always communicating with each other, either on the field or in the bunk, learning to work to-gether as a team and part of the camp community. They also get to be leaders at camp whether guiding a first time younger camper or lead-ing their camp Olympics team. While at camp, children are learning to navigate things on their own and solving problems by themselves, with-out the assistance of a parent. Camp also offers numerous opportunities for creativity, something that often doesn’t get fostered in the academic setting.

Camp allows kids to unplug from technology & communicate–Today’s children spend over 7.5

hours a day engaged in media, which prevents children from taking part in hands on activ-

ities and socializing with other children. The majority of summer camps ban most technology, including TV, smart phones, ipads and computers. At camp, children are always communicating with each other, whether it’s on the tennis court or over lunch. Taking a break from tech-nology over the summer allows chil-dren to communicate face to face and

take part in social interactions. Today’s children need the camp environment more

than ever to have true face to face conversa-tions without the use of technology to commu-

nicate with each other.

Camp educates the whole child–School and the traditional classroom is great for many things, but

it doesn’t address the whole child. There is more to learning than quizzes, tests and good grades. Camp is one of the most powerful learning environments and can be a place where a child’s social edu-cation takes place. Camp provides children with the opportunity to try new activities and when children succeed at these activities, they build self-esteem. Children also build social skills and problem solv-ing skills by being part of a supportive community and taking part in activities together. At camp, campers are challenged every day and camp directors design their program so children are learning new activities while also developing confidence, leadership, teamwork, and sportsman-ship at the same time.

play is known to help children in their social and emotional development–Today’s youth can be overly busy with homework, music lessons, and afterschool activities, which doesn’t leave much room for play. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) reports that free and unstructured play is healthy and essential for helping children to reach important social, emotional, and cognitive developmental milestones as well as helping them manage stress. Traditional summer camps give chil-dren plenty of opportunities to play which leads to healthy emotional and social development.

For free assistance in finding the right ACA Accredited summer camp, visit the American Camp Association, NY and NJ’s camp website www.searchforacamp.org. ACA Accreditation is a parent’s best evidence of a camp’s commitment to a safe and nurturing environment. You may also call the American Camp Association, NY and NJ’s camper placement specialist Renee Flax for free, one-on-one advice in finding the right camp at 212.391.5208.✲

5 Benefits of Summer Camp

You May Not Know About By Jess Michaels

http://www.searchforacamp.org

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LIBERTY LAKE Liberty Lake is a truly transformative experience, teaching life skills to inspire children and adults to change the world. Campers expand their talents, make friends, and have the greatest summer experi-ence imaginable! Check out the Freedom of Choice Elective Program. 1195 Florence Columbus Road, Bordentown, NJ 08505 609.499.7820, www.LibertyLakeDayCamp.com.

CHRISTIAN PLAYCARE CENTER SUMMER CAMP Ages 6-12 are invited to enjoy our large indoor/out-door facility which offers weekly themed crafts and activities, weekly trips and a large outdoor pool with a certified lifeguard. Mention this add for FREE registration! Call Today! 1737 Cooper St, Deptford (856) 227-5596.

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Explorer’s Club

For children with ADHD, Austism Spectrum Disorder, PDD, & other behavior challenges; Ages 4-17

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Social Skills

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Documents

April 2015 - South Jersey MOM Magazine