CHAPTER SIXCHAPTER SIX

CommunicationCommunication

Communication in Communication in NegotiationNegotiation

Communication processes, both verbal Communication processes, both verbal and nonverbal, are critical to and nonverbal, are critical to achieving negotiation goals and to achieving negotiation goals and to resolving conflicts.resolving conflicts.

Negotiation is a process of interactionNegotiation is a process of interaction Negotiation is a context for Negotiation is a context for

communication subtleties that influence communication subtleties that influence processes and outcomesprocesses and outcomes

What Is Communicated What Is Communicated during Negotiation?during Negotiation?

Offers, counteroffers, and motivesOffers, counteroffers, and motives Information about alternativesInformation about alternatives Information about outcomesInformation about outcomes Social accountsSocial accounts

• Explanations of mitigating circumstancesExplanations of mitigating circumstances• Explanations of exonerating circumstancesExplanations of exonerating circumstances• Reframing explanationsReframing explanations

Communication about processCommunication about process

How People Communicate How People Communicate in Negotiationin Negotiation

Selection of a communication channelSelection of a communication channel• Communication is experienced differently Communication is experienced differently

when it occurs through different channelswhen it occurs through different channels• People negotiate through a variety of People negotiate through a variety of

communication media – by phone, in writing communication media – by phone, in writing and increasingly through electronic channels or and increasingly through electronic channels or virtual negotiationsvirtual negotiations

• Social presence distinguishes one Social presence distinguishes one communication channel from another.communication channel from another.

the ability of a channel to carry and convey subtle the ability of a channel to carry and convey subtle social cues from sender to receiversocial cues from sender to receiver

How People Communicate How People Communicate

Use of languageUse of language• LogicalLogical level (proposals, offers) level (proposals, offers)• PragmaticPragmatic level (semantics, syntax, style) level (semantics, syntax, style)

Use of nonverbal communicationUse of nonverbal communication• Making eye contactMaking eye contact• Adjusting body positionAdjusting body position• Nonverbally encouraging orNonverbally encouraging or discouraging what the other discouraging what the other sayssays

Communication skillsCommunication skills

Active listeningActive listening Skillful questioningSkillful questioning ParaphrasingParaphrasing ReframingReframing Sending clear Sending clear

messagesmessages

How to ImproveHow to ImproveCommunication in NegotiationCommunication in Negotiation

Use of questions: two basic categoriesUse of questions: two basic categories• ManageableManageable

Cause attention or prepare the other Cause attention or prepare the other person’s thinking for further questions:person’s thinking for further questions:

• ““May I ask you a question?” May I ask you a question?” getting information getting information

• ““How much will this cost?”How much will this cost?” generating thoughtsgenerating thoughts

• ““Do you have any suggestions for improving Do you have any suggestions for improving this?”this?”

How to ImproveHow to ImproveCommunication in NegotiationCommunication in Negotiation

Use of questions: two basic categoriesUse of questions: two basic categories• Unmanageable questionsUnmanageable questions

Cause difficultyCause difficulty• ““Where did you get that dumb idea?”Where did you get that dumb idea?”

give informationgive information• ““Didn’t you know we couldn’t afford this?”Didn’t you know we couldn’t afford this?”

bring the discussion to a false conclusionbring the discussion to a false conclusion• ““Don’t you think we have talked about this Don’t you think we have talked about this

enough?”enough?”

SKILLFUL SKILLFUL QUESTIONINGQUESTIONING

General – most openGeneral – most open• What’s on your mind?What’s on your mind?• What can you tell me about this situation?What can you tell me about this situation?• What happened?What happened?

Opinion Seeking – openOpinion Seeking – open• What do you think would be fair?What do you think would be fair?• What is most important to you?What is most important to you?• What is your reaction to my proposal?What is your reaction to my proposal?

Fact Finding – somewhat openFact Finding – somewhat open• Who needs to approve this?Who needs to approve this?• When is the deadline?When is the deadline?• Where, What, When, How?Where, What, When, How?

SKILLFUL SKILLFUL QUESTIONINGQUESTIONING

Narrow Direct or Forced Choice – mostly Narrow Direct or Forced Choice – mostly closedclosed• Did you tell me before it happened?Did you tell me before it happened?• Will you be there before 5 o’clock?Will you be there before 5 o’clock?• Will you accept my version of the Will you accept my version of the

agreement w/o any changes?agreement w/o any changes? Leading – closedLeading – closed

• Isn’t it true that there is no alternative?Isn’t it true that there is no alternative?• Didn’t you say that it would be done without Didn’t you say that it would be done without

fail by Tuesday?fail by Tuesday?

How to Improve How to Improve Communication Communication

Listening: three major formsListening: three major forms1.1. Passive listening: Receiving the message Passive listening: Receiving the message

while providing no feedback to the senderwhile providing no feedback to the sender2.2. Acknowledgment: Receivers nod their heads, Acknowledgment: Receivers nod their heads,

maintain eye contact, or interject responses maintain eye contact, or interject responses 3.3. Active listening: Receivers restate or Active listening: Receivers restate or

paraphrase the sender’s message in their paraphrase the sender’s message in their own languageown language

LListening is Important istening is Important andandPowerfulPowerful

• • Good listening is helpful in and of Good listening is helpful in and of itselfitself

• • Builds trust and rapportBuilds trust and rapport • • Deescalates/calmsDeescalates/calms • • Creates clarityCreates clarity • • Listening is a precursor to problem-Listening is a precursor to problem-

solvingsolving • • Feels like a “gift”--everyone wants Feels like a “gift”--everyone wants

to be heardto be heard

What’s “Active” About It?What’s “Active” About It?

• • Requires work and concentrationRequires work and concentration • • Two-wayTwo-way

Three ways of looking at ActiveThree ways of looking at ActiveListeningListening

– – Set of skills (e.g. open-ended questions)Set of skills (e.g. open-ended questions)– – Ability to focus/concentrate -- focused on all Ability to focus/concentrate -- focused on all

aspects of speaker’s communication, setting aspects of speaker’s communication, setting aside my own issues for the moment.aside my own issues for the moment.

– – Attitudes (ideally):Attitudes (ideally):• • I care what this person has to sayI care what this person has to say• • I’m sincerely curious about how this person seesI’m sincerely curious about how this person seesthingsthings• • I’m willing to withhold judgment and accept thisI’m willing to withhold judgment and accept thisperson’s reactions, perceptions, feelings asperson’s reactions, perceptions, feelings aslegitimate.legitimate.

Active Listening SkillsActive Listening Skills

• • Get the StoryGet the Story • • Probe / Clarify MeaningsProbe / Clarify Meanings • • Listen for EmotionsListen for Emotions • • SummarizeSummarize • • Value SilenceValue Silence

PARAPHRASINGPARAPHRASING

Focuses on the experience of the Focuses on the experience of the speaker.speaker.

Important because:Important because:• Lets speaker know s/he has been Lets speaker know s/he has been

heard and understoodheard and understood• Receiver makes sure s/he gets it rightReceiver makes sure s/he gets it right• Gives the speaker an opportunity to Gives the speaker an opportunity to

access the message and to modify itaccess the message and to modify it

REFRAMINGREFRAMING

Redirecting, limiting, or shaping the Redirecting, limiting, or shaping the perception of a message so that it is perception of a message so that it is more constructivemore constructive• Message may have negative dimensionMessage may have negative dimension• May contains threat, insult or offensive May contains threat, insult or offensive

languagelanguage Choose a positive interpretationChoose a positive interpretation

REFRAMING-Examples:REFRAMING-Examples:

Reframing position to interestReframing position to interest Reframing a judgment to a problemReframing a judgment to a problem Reframing a blame to a needReframing a blame to a need Reframing a past to a futureReframing a past to a future Reframing an individual problem to a Reframing an individual problem to a

shared problemshared problem

SENDING CLEAR MESSAGESSENDING CLEAR MESSAGES Negotiators need to make sure they are Negotiators need to make sure they are

understoodunderstood SuggestionsSuggestions

• Replace abstract concepts with Replace abstract concepts with concrete descriptionsconcrete descriptions

• Send Send II messages instead of messages instead of YouYou..• Accept personal responsibility for Accept personal responsibility for

interpretation. Avoid placing blameinterpretation. Avoid placing blame and putting others on the and putting others on the

defensive.defensive.

How to Improve How to Improve Communication in NegotiationCommunication in Negotiation Role reversalRole reversal

• Negotiators understand the other party’s Negotiators understand the other party’s positions by actively arguing these positions positions by actively arguing these positions until the other party is convinced that he or until the other party is convinced that he or she is understoodshe is understood

• Negotiators realize that increasing Negotiators realize that increasing understanding does not necessarily lead to understanding does not necessarily lead to easy resolution of the conflicteasy resolution of the conflict

Special Communication Special Communication Considerations at the Close of Considerations at the Close of

NegotiationsNegotiations Avoiding fatal mistakesAvoiding fatal mistakes

• Keeping track of what you expect to happenKeeping track of what you expect to happen• Systematically guarding yourself against self-Systematically guarding yourself against self-

serving expectationsserving expectations• Reviewing the lessons from feedback for Reviewing the lessons from feedback for

similar decisions in the futuresimilar decisions in the future Achieving closureAchieving closure

• Avoid surrendering important information Avoid surrendering important information needlesslyneedlessly

• Refrain from making “dumb remarks”Refrain from making “dumb remarks”