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EmotionsA Crash Course! Jeanne L. Jensma, Ph.D.ALONGSIDE

AWR ConferenceSEND InternationalOctober 6, 2010

1God of EmotionPeople of EmotionI.Passionate GodII. Purposeful emotionIII. Forbidden feelingsIV.Failure feelingsV. The Fundamental feeling

2I. Passionate GodGods Emotions

3I. Passionate GodGods Emotions

LoveJoyPeaceJealousyAnger/WrathSadness/Grief(Etc.)

4I. Passionate GodJesus Emotions

5I. Passionate GodJesus Emotions

LoveJoyAngerFearLonelinessGrief(Etc.!)

(Emotional Wholeness, Richard Mohline)6I. Passionate GodPassionate God Passionate People

To be godly, we must be passionate!

7II. Purposeful EmotionWe were created for Garden-living!8II. Purposeful EmotionWe were created for Garden-living!

Were not in Eden any more!9II. Purposeful EmotionWe were created for Garden-living!Were not in Eden any more!

PAIN! LOSS! HURT! DANGER! (Interspersed with reminders of Edenand foreshadowings of Heaven)10II. Purposeful EmotionWe were created for Garden-living!Were not in Eden any more!PAIN! LOSS! HURT! DANGER! (Interspersed with reminders of Eden and foreshadowings of Heaven).

So-called negative emotions equip us for thorn-living.11II. Purposeful EmotionWe were created for Garden-living!Were not in Eden any more!PAIN! LOSS! HURT! DANGER! (Interspersed with reminders of Eden and foreshadowings of Heaven).So-called negative emotions equip us for thorn-living.

So-called negative emotions are gifts from God! 12II. Purposeful EmotionWe were created for Garden-living!

Were not in Eden any more!

PAIN! LOSS! HURT! DANGER! (Interspersed with reminders of Eden and foreshadowings of Heaven).

So-called negative emotions equip us for thorn-living.

So-called negative emotions are gifts from God. 13II. Purposeful EmotionEmotional Intelligence:

IQ = Intelligence Quotient

EQ = Emotions Quotient

14II. Purposeful EmotionHigh EQ invites intimacy.

High EQ helps create intimacy.

High EQ sustains intimacy.15II. Purposeful EmotionHigh EQ helps us get to heart-issues in our own lives and the lives of others!

Getting to heart issues More effective ministry!16II. Purposeful EmotionHigh EQ

Knowing what I am feeling in the moment; being able to experience my feelings and name them;being able to share my feelings with safe others when I choose to do so, but being able to keep my feelings to myself when appropriate; being able to express my feelings but without allowing them to control me;being sensitive to others feelings, and having skills in inviting others to share their feelings; being a person with whom others feel safe sharing their hearts; being a good listener and a good reflector of others feelings. 17II. Purposeful EmotionHow Is Your EQ?18II. Purposeful Emotion(And if you are marriedHow is your spouses EQ?)19III. Five Forbidden FeelingsFearGriefAngerLonelinessDepression

20III. Five Forbidden FeelingsFear Purpose of Fear

to alert us to danger and equip us to deal with the danger

21III. Five Forbidden FeelingsFear Dealing with Fear in the moment:

Deep breathingSmiley faceSafe placeTotal-body relaxationMeditation

Prevention:

Consistent aerobic exercise

22III. Five Forbidden FeelingsGrief Purpose of Grief

to give a us process that provides healing for loss

23III. Five Forbidden FeelingsGrief Dealing with Grief:

Balance alone times and together timesEat, drink, sleep, exercise appropriatelyPut your pain into wordspray, journal,talk to SAFE othersLearn to postpone rather than squashSet aside times of remembranceGrieve, but do not allow griefto dominate your life

24III. Five Forbidden FeelingsAnger Purpose of Anger

to alert us to injustice and equip us to deal with injustice

25III. Five Forbidden FeelingsAnger Dealing with Anger:

Check the factsAlign your perspectiveFind constructive use for extra adrenalineForgive when appropriate

26III. Five Forbidden FeelingsLoneliness Purpose of Loneliness

to remind us that we were created for relationship and to motivate us to reach out towards others

27III. Five Forbidden FeelingsLoneliness Sometimes in church circles when people are lonely, we will tell them not to expect too much from human relationships, that there is inside every human being a God-shaped void that no other person can fill. That is true. But apparently according to the writer of Genesis God creates inside this man a kind of human-shaped void that God himself will not fill. John Ortberg

28928III. Five Forbidden FeelingsLoneliness Dealing with Loneliness:

Seek friendships around mutual interestsDevelop NETWORK of friends, communitySpread relational needs over many friendsSeek mentoring in friendship-buildingDont allow loneliness to entice you into dangerous friendshipsDiscern which void needs filling

29III. Five Forbidden FeelingsDepression Purpose of Depression

to remind us that we are in a Fallen world where there is much pain, to motivate us to search out the cause of our pain and seek healing for it, and to prompt us to longfor Jesus return, when He will make ALL THINGS RIGHT!

30III. Five Forbidden FeelingsDepression Dealing with Garden Variety Depression: (not clinical depression!)

Eat, drink, sleep, exercise appropriatelyFocus on something positiveDo something nice for somebodySmile!

Prevention:

Consistent aerobic exercise

31III. Five Forbidden FeelingsSummary Angerto alert us to danger and equip us to deal with the danger

Griefto give us a process that provides healing for loss

Angerto alert us to injustice and equip us to deal with the injustice

Lonelinessto remind us that we were created for relationship and to motivate us to reach out towards others

Depressionto remind us that we are in a Fallen world where there is much pain, to motivate us to search out the cause of our pain and seek healing for it, and to prompt us to long for Jesus return whenHe will make ALL THINGS RIGHT!

32IV. Two Failure FeelingsShameThe feeling that I am bad, that there is something wrong with me, with who I am, with my very person, my essence.

GuiltThe feeling that I did something bad, that there is something wrong with my behavior.

33IV. Two Failure FeelingsTrue ShameApart from Christ, there is something very wrong with my person. Solution: Come to Christ and accept His atonement to make me good instead of bad.

True GuiltI have sinned in thought, word and deed. I have broken Gods moral law. Solution: confess to God and person sinned against. Make restitution if possible.

34IV. Two Failure FeelingsFalse ShameOnce I am in Christ, I am a new creature, I am the righteousness of God, I am a saint. I must argue with the Enemys attempts to make me feel false shame.

False GuiltI have not sinned in this situation, even though other people may think my behavior is wrong. I must argue with the Accuser of the Brethren!

35V. One Fundamental FeelingJOY!

Shalom is The webbing together of God, humans, and all creation in justice, fulfillment, and delight.

Neil Plantinga

36SUMMARYPassionate God Passionate PeopleEmotions have a purposeNegativeto equip us to live in a Fallen WorldPositiveto experience a glimpse, foretaste of HeavenBothto invite, create, sustain intimacy with God and others High EQ consists of being able to share our emotions with others and enter into theirs

37SUMMARYHigh EQDeeper relationshipsDeeper level of communityGreater personal wholenessGreater ministry effectiveness

38EmotionsA Crash Course! Jeanne L. Jensma, Ph.D.ALONGSIDE

AWR ConferenceSEND InternationalOctober 6, 2010

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