ENABLING CHANGE: The Dynamics of Influence, Collaboration, and Trust

© Trusted Advisor Associates LLC, 2009 all rights reserved

ENABLING CHANGE: The Dynamics of Influence, Collaboration, and Trust


© 2009-2010 Trusted Advisor Associates LLC. All rights reserved.

2SOA e-Government Conference, May 2010

Welcomewww.trustedadvisor.com/MITRE


Enabling Change: The Dynamics of Influence, Collaboration, and Trust



Common People ChallengesWHAT’S MOST VEXING FOR YOU?

1.Make a compelling case2.Gain the agreement of diverse

stakeholders3.Navigate organizational politics4.Recover from mistakes5.Move on from disappointment





Goals for TodayAT THE END OF THIS PRESENTATION YOU WILL:

1.Know the four essential elements of trustworthiness

2.Understand the “secret weapon” of influence

3.Appreciate the paradox of trust and be able to put it to work





Building Blocks





The Trust EquationWHAT DO YOU LEAD WITH?

C + R + I S

T trustworthinessC credibilityR reliabilityI intimacyS self-orientation

T =





How We Think People ThinkIT’S A QUESTION OF FOCUS

Facts Logic Truth





Cialdini on InfluenceTHE PSYCHOLOGY OF PERSUASION

The number one factor of influence is reciprocity … and after that:

• Authority• Consensus• Consistency• Scarcity• Liking





Gottman on Long-Term PartnershipTHE IMPORTANCE OF EMPATHY

“Understanding must precede advice.”

“You have to let your partner know that you fully understand and empathize … before you suggest a solution.”

http://www.amazon.com/gp/reader/0609601040/ref=sib_dp_pt/103-5814403-9381435#reader-link





What Empathy Sounds Like

“That’s a tough

spot to be in.”

“Sounds like we haven’t

done a good job making our case.”

“I’m very sorry to hear that. I’m

sure that’s frustrating, to say the least.”

“I don’t see value in that.”

“We’re just not sure which way to go.”

“I’m disappointed by your team’s results.”





Thomas Friedman on Listening

“People often ask me how I, an American Jew, have been able to operate in the Arab/Muslim world for 20 years, and my answer to them is always the same. The secret is to be a good listener …”“ … It's not just what you hear by listening that is important. It is what you say by listening that is important...”“ … Never underestimate how much people just want to feel that they have been heard; once you have given them that chance, they will hear you.”





Trust as a Two-Way Street

What role do you play?




Key Takeaways




WITH OUR COMPLIMENTS

The Goodie Bag

www.trustedadvisor.com/MITRE•TrustMatters Blog •Your Trust Quotient•Trust Services

[email protected]

Documents

ENABLING CHANGE: The Dynamics of Influence, Collaboration, and Trust