GRAPEVINEeditor-in-chief WHITNEY SLIGHTHAMcheif financial officer JOHN WITHER

marketing & advertising director JOHN WITHERcreative director KATRINA LAT

features editor ADAM SCHWARTZlifestyle editor KATHERINE HOPE MURDICK

arts editor BRENT HOLMESopinons editor ANGELA EASBY

local issues editor RACHAEL BELLcopy editor JORDAN SOWUNMI

photography editor ROSS LINDEN-FRASER

executive board

WHITNEY SLIGHTHAM, JOHN WITHER, ANDREW CANNON, KATHERINE HOPE MURDICK, SHAUN ASHLEY

contributing staff

ANDREW PEL, ANGELA EASBY, ANDREW CANNON, SARAH TOWNSEND, KATRINA LAT, ROSS LINDEN-FRASER, PATRICK BARFOOT, ANGELA HERRING-LAUZON, ADAM SCHWARTZ, BRENT HOLMES, ANDREW SERCOMBE, RACHAEL BELL, SHAUN NUGENT, JORDAN SOWUNMI, BRITTANY LINTON, BEN HALL, NICOLE

GOODBRAND, HILLETE WARNER, ANNIKA WANG, KATIE HOLMES, CONNOR HILL

layout designers

KATRINA LAT, ANDREW SERCOMBE, JULIA DEO, ANGELA HERRING-LAUZON, HILLETE WARNER, WHITNEY SLIGHTHAM, KATHERINE HOPE MURDICK

cover photo

COMPLIMENTS OF LIGHTS AND HER PROMOTIONAL TEAM

sales /advertising / marketing team

BEN GOTTLIEB, CANDI GONG, CAROLINE BLAKE, CATHERINE EICHMANN, DANICA TRAPARADONALD MAK, HATTIE ZHOU, ISHAN TIKKU, JOYCE YU, SABRINA REN

photographers

ANDREW SERCOMBE, KATRINA LAT, DANIAL ORCHARD, SHAWN TRON, ROSS LINDEN-FRASER, THALY TAPIA, KATHERINE HOPE MURDICK, ANGELA HERRING

twitter @grapevine_zine

WHITNEY SLIGHTHAM, KATHERINE HOPE MURDICK

facebook: @hurons grapevine

WHITNEY SLIGHTHAM

advertising inquiries: grapevine.inquiries@gmail.com

KATRINA LAT

GRAPEVINE MAGAZINEHURON UNIVERSITY COLLEGE

WESTERN ROAD 1349LONDON, ONTARIO, CANADA

N6G 1H3

FUNDED BY HURON STUDENTS COUNCILGRAPEVINE MAGAZINE • OCT 2011• FREE PUBLICATION

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INSIDE

FEATURES . . . . . . . . . . 6

LIGHTS INTERVIEW

OBSCURE OCTOBER HOLIDAYS

BUDGET HALLOWEEN COSTUMES

NEWS . . . . . . . . . . . . 16

AROUND THE WORLD IN FOUR PARAGRAPHS

LONDON BOY TASERED BY COP

LOCAL ISSUES . . . . . 19

LOCAL FARMER’S MARKETS

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

AN UNHOLY CONSUMPTION OF POUTINE

HURON, BRESCIA, KING’S, UWO - WHERE DO YOU BELONG?

PROFESSOR PROFILE

WHEN I WAS AN UNDERGRAD

ARTS . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

SCARY MOVIE DRINKING GAMES

DC COMICS RELAUNCH

CULTURE YOUR ASS: INTERIORS

FALL TV REVIEW

LIFESTYLE . . . . . . . . . 36

DRINK UP: BUTTER BEER

WHY I WISH MY LIFE WERE A BIOWARE RPG

BEDTIME SNACKS

GRAPEVINE PHOTO CONTEST

DEAR BRIT: RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

HALLOWEEN PICKUP LINES

WHICH WESTERN MASCOT RE-FLECTS YOUR DATING PERSONALITY?

INFORMED INK

SAVE TIME, ORDER ONLINE: GROCERY CHECKOUT

TO BE, OR NOT TO BE (TOGETHER)

FALL TRENDS

FIVE WAYS TO AVOID THE FRESH-MEN FIFTEEN

HOW TO SURVIVE FIRST YEAR, HAVE SOME FUN, AND RETAIN YOUR SANITY

GRAND THEATRE 11/12 SEASON

OPINIONS . . . . . . . . . 54

MY DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATION-SHIP WITH THE GYM

HELLO SLUTTY NURSE

ON EARTH EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU CRITIQUE

IS TECHNOLOGY MAKING US MORE NARCISSISTIC?

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FEATURES

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GV: You did a lot of touring before signing a major record deal. How does playing shows now compare to when you first started? And where does a concert like Western’s O Week rank?

LIGHTS: Every time we do a show it gets a little big-ger and a little louder; more people singing along. We get a bit more comfortable up there and the live show gets a little bit stronger each time. The show at Western was awesome; so many people! It’s a different type of show though because everyone is not necessarily there to see you, nor are they necessarily familiar with you. The en-ergy is high and they’re usually quite fun [college/uni-versity shows] but a different animal in terms of crowd involvement.

GV: Besides touring, you also use the internet more than most artists to showcase your music. Can you talk a little bit about how you use the web to build a global fan-base?

LIGHTS: Social media has been a terrific outlet for get-ting details, music, news and info out there instantly. The best part about it is that it’s there for good, so people can go back to it and revisit archived information. It’s become crucial for me when building up the fan base, as well as al-lowing me just to be myself. It’s an outlet for me to show exactly who I am so I don’t feel like I have to be some-body else on stage or camera, etc.

GV: You’ve said before that the name Lights represents a new phase in your life. Can you explain what your name symbolizes to you and how this new phase in your life affects your music?

LIGHTS: More so, changing my name to Lights was a change that I made in just growing up, in becoming who I am. My dad always told me “your career and your per-sonal life should ideally flow together seamlessly.” This was just one of those things. Because music is so honest and has to come from a really true part of you, it wouldn’t make sense to separate them too much.

MEET LIGHTS

GV: Do you think having missionaries as parents and spending your childhood abroad helped you develop such an accessible sound?

LIGHTS: I’m not sure if growing up abroad really af-fected the sound of my music, rather really prepared me for this lifestyle, this up-and-go thing. If anything affected the sound of my music it was probably the strong melo-dies in worship music that I grew up on. Worship songs are meant to be learned and sung along with by the time you’re halfway through the song, which is key for pop tunes.

GV: Did anything changed for you between The Listening and your new album Siberia?

LIGHTS: Siberia is grittier, less perfect, and came from a happier place than The Listening. Though some of the songs may sound darker on Siberia, most of them are truly happy songs. The Listening came from a bit more of a sad place, I had just moved away on my own and was just sorting myself out. Ironically they sometimes came out sounding happier.

GV: Everyone asks about musical influences, but that’s boring (plus we read you like Bjork in a million other interviews), rumor is you’re really into Sailor Moon so confirm or deny and do you have any other favourite TV shows, movies, or books that affect your work?

LIGHTS: I’m inspired the most by visuals. That could be where my fascination with comics comes from. Sailor Moon had so many cool morph scenes and beautiful girls, so graceful. It really contributed to the style of the cover art of The Listening. I really like that stuff. Same with a lot of anime films and mangas, video games like War-craft [the imagination and effort that goes into making that game look great is remarkable], comic art [especially cover art, where more details are involved] and imagina-tive movies like Labyrinth, Barbarella, and Logan’s Run. Visuals keeps me thinking outside the box and remind me that in art there really are no rules.

FEATURES

INTERVIEWERS: Adam Schwartz, John Wither INTERVIEWEE: LightsPHOTOS: Thaly Tapia, Lights’ Promotional Team

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GV: On your website there is a picture of you with a giant sword and a caption calling it “another weapon”. You have to tell us about your weapon collection.

LIGHTS: My wep wall is something that just kind of started happening. I started buying various sharp objects every time I felt like I needed a boost of empowerment, and it kind of worked! Now I get one every time I feel like I’m due, or something significant hap-pens. I’ve also been given some amazing ones by fans. So crazy! I have about 30 different daggers, swords and lazer guns including the Halo energy sword, Arwen’s sword (from LOTR), Twinblade of the Phoenix (Warcraft), Frostmourne (Warcraft), replica lightsaber, and Ichigo Kurosaki’s Zanpakuto from Bleach.

GV: The Grapevine is doing a feature on tattoos this month. Could you explain some of yours?

LIGHTS: My back piece is an adaptation of the cover of Wonder Woman 2 volume 3 where she’s fighting off Giganta’s giant hand. This was one of the first tattoos I got and a big commitment to wanting to feel empowered! My left ribs say “In this fearsome pilgrim-age unearth a crusader’s heart” which was something that was just drifting through my head for a few days. I was going to use it as a lyric but couldn’t make it work anywhere, but it really spoke to me in the time I was in. One day we had to cancel a show in Denver because the roads were closed due to blizzards and we ended up in a small town called Fort Collins. We were all in terrible moods so I escaped to a tattoo shop we passed on the way in and got it done. I have Captain Lights’ lazer gun tattooed on my left hip (check out the Captain Lights series created with Tomm Coker of Marvel on youtube, there are 10 episodes with songs from The Listening used as soundtrack). On my right inside ankle I have a hearthstone which, in World of Warcraft, brings you home no matter where you are. That’s a few of them! My response is already too long!

I ALSO HAVE ABOUT 30 DIFFERENT DAGGERS, SWORDS, AND LASER GUNS INCLUDING THE HALO ENERGY SWORD, ARWEN’S SWORD, TWINBLADE OF THE PHEONIX, FROSTMOURNE, A REPLICA LIGHTSABER AND ICHIGO KUROSAKI’S

ZANPAKUTO FROM BLEACH.

GV: We heard you’re a fan of World of Warcraft, can you tell us little about your character and firstly alliance or hoard? As well, with the decrease in WoW subscriptions will you be moving on to a new game? Maybe Diablo 3 or Star Wars: The Old Republic?

LIGHTS: I love WoW, I’ve been playing for years and whether or not it continues to be su-per popular I’ll probably still love it. Less players just means shorter queues for dungeons! My main character is a Draenei Death Knight, unholy spec. I’ve tried my hand at a few other MMO’s (Champions online, Aion, LOTRO, etc.) but nothing has stuck with me like WoW. Maybe that will change though, who knows?

GV: We all know you are a big DC Comics fan so what are your thoughts on the highly contested relaunch? Which comics will you be picking up and which will you be passing over? What are your expectations for Wonder Woman #1 Written by Brian Azzarello? What do you think on the new artistic direction?

LIGHTS: As for the new Wonder Woman, I’m interested to see where it’s going. I didn’t like some of the recent changes to her look, so I haven’t bought the comics for a little while. I am definitely getting #1 though to see where it’s headed. Someone told me she looks a bit like me now? I’m intrigued, hah! They always seem to bring their characters back to a good spot after major changes, so I have high expectations!

FEATURES

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GV: So you have suggested that there is a heavy Dub-step influence on Siberia. What is the reason for this change, and do you think that this might deter your existing fan base?

LIGHTS: I’ve applied the elements I love in dubstep: heavy bass, slow, groovy drums, and sparse produc-tion, to the new material. I wanted to find a way to marry melody with that raunch and heaviness. So there aren’t any blatant dubstep parts except for a few tastes (and a little tribute drop in Fourth Dimension). Anything you do that is different will deter some of your fan base. What matters is that you know you’re making the best possible thing you can at that stage in your life. And that’s what I did.

GV: So you have done collabora-tions with groups Owl City and Bring Me The Horizon, both from very different genres. How do these materialize? Do you seek them out or are you sought after?

LIGHTS: Most of the collaborations happen pretty naturally, the ones that work the best anyway. Since we had done a 5-month tour with Owl City early in 2010, he asked me to lend my voice to a song on the new record, I was stoked to do it. I met the BMTH guys on tour when we were both snowed in somewhere in Rhode Island, back in 09. We’ve been friends ever since, so when they asked me to be part of their new record, I was also pleased to join in!

GV: In terms of collaboration is there anyone specific you have your eye on and would love to work with in the future?

LIGHTS: Micheal Buble! I love him! But really - the sky’s the limit with these things. One year ago, a collaboration with Holy Fuck wouldn’t have crossed my mind, but one thing leads to another... we played a festival last summer on the same stage, then Jian, my manager, suggested the collab, which seemed far out but ended up being all over the record. Who knows what’s next, you know?

I’VE APPLIED THE ELEMENTS I LOVE IN DUBSTEP: HEAVY BASS, SLOW, GROOVY

DRUMS, AND SPARSE PRODUCTION, TO THE NEW MATERIAL. I WANTED TO FIND A WAY TO MARRY MELODY WITH THAT RAUNCH

AND HEAVINESS.

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FEATURES

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WORDS: Katrina Lat, Angela Herring-Lauzon PHOTOS: Katherine Hope

DID YOU KNOW...OCTOBER IS ADOPT

A SHELTER ANIMAL MONTH?

FEATURES

OCTOBER 1 - HOMEMADE COOKIES DAYTake this opportunity to create a new signature homemade cookie recipe. Do I hear leek and potato shortbread anyone?

OCTOBER 1 - WORLD VEGETARIAN DAYObserved annually, World Vegetarian Day was established by the North American Vegetarian Society in 1977. It kicks off a whole month of aware-ness events surrounding vegetarianism and healthy eating.

OCTOBER 2 - NAME YOUR CAR DAYApparently naming one’s car is serious business, so much so that an entire day has been dedicated to doing just that.

OCTOBER 4 - NATIONAL GOLF DAYDepending on the source you refer to, National Golf Day either falls in Oc-tober or April. To be entirely honest, April probably makes a lot more sense, but we can use this coincidence as a chance to reminisce of the warm weather we once had.

OCTOBER 5 - WORLD TEACHER DAYCelebrated every year since 1994 and recognized by UNESCO, this day aims to celebrate and thank educational organizations worldwide. Too bad not more students are aware of this day!

OCTOBER 9 - LEIF ERIKSON DAYHey everybody! It’s Leif Erikson Day! Hinga Dinga Durgen!!!

OCTOBER 9 - THE COUNT’S BIRTHDAYBecause who doesn’t love throwing birthday parties for Sesame Street’s fic-tional puppet characters? Side note: Grover’s birthday is on the 14th.

OCTOBER 10 - CANADIAN THANKSGIVINGThose lovely people down South seem to celebrate Thanksgiving a month late.

OCTOBER 12 - FARMER’S DAYA time to honour all those individuals whose contribution to the agricultural society goes well beyond the benefits of Farmville.

OCTOBER 12 - FREETHOUGHT DAYIn honour of Freethought Day, the following sentence will contain a Mad Lib. The Grapevine __________ you a(n) _____________ occasion! (insert verb here) (insert adjective here)

OCTOBER 15 - NATIONAL GROUCH DAYInspired by Sesame Street’s Oscar, this holiday’s name pretty much says it all.

OCTOBER 15 - SWEETEST DAYA day (somewhat unsuccessfully) concocted by confectionary manufacturers in an attempt to boost sales. Regardless, take this opportunity to celebrate your friends, family, and how sweet life is because of them.

OCTOBER 15 - NATIONAL POETRY DAYOn National Poetry Day, All poets and writers shall sway! As they join arms in song And recite verse in throngs, For words are that with which they play!

OCTOBER 16 - DICTIONARY DAYFun Fact: When I attempted to search “Dictionary Day” on www.thefreedic-tionary.com, the phrase was nowhere to be found. On this day, celebrate words that actually do exist.

OCTOBER 22 - NATIONAL NUT DAYAs to whether this day serves to celebrate nuts of the food, or human variety is a topic of intense academic debate.

OCTOBER 22 - INTERNATIONAL STUTTERING AWARENESS DAYDesignated as a holiday in 1998, this day aims to raise awareness of various speech disorders and stuttering.

OCTOBER 23 - MOTHER-IN-LAW’S DAYIt’s nice to see even mothers-in-law get a whole day dedicated to celebrating them. The holiday was first observed in 2002, because really, in-laws deserve a celebration too - no matter how unbearable they may be.

OCTOBER 28 - PLUSH ANIMAL LOVER’S DAYYou now have a legitimate excuse to whip out your old Beanie Baby collec-tion.

OCTOBER - ADOPT A SHELTER ANIMAL MONTHTake this opportunity to go to your local shelter and give a new home to a furry friend, or, alternatively, adopt the local squirrels and train it to hunt those skunks that wander the streets of London.

EVERYBODY KNOWS ABOUT HALLOWEEN. THE ONE DAY A YEAR WHERE IT IS SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE TO WEAR YOUR UNDERWEAR IN PUBLIC. BUT WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER OBSCURE HOLIDAYS THAT TAKE PLACE IN OCTOBER?

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COSTUMES ON A BUDGET

So it’s Hallowe’en. You’ve spent all your money on the liquor that makes this holiday fun, much like candy used to do when you were a child, and you’ve got nothing left for a costume. Well, with this handy-dandy guide, you won’t be stuck going as some awful pun costume like a “law suit” or “cereal killer”. Seriously, I know cereal is cheap, but if I see someone toting a box with a knife through it at another party, I will punch them square in the jaw. Anyhow, here are a few ideas:

1) Time Traveller

Pretend you’re a professor from the Victorian era who has cracked the secret to time travel and ar-rived in 2011. You can wear mostly normal clothes (to ‘adapt to this future time period’) and set it off with a top hat (widely available near Hallowe’en), a painted on mustache, and maybe some old-timey spectacles with false lenses, which can sometimes be found at drugstores. The costume is minimal, but this one is all about charisma. Just joke about your lack of understanding of modern technology. Cellphones awe you, traffic frightens you, and you can’t stop gawking at how revealing clothing has become in this century! This might be hard to get used to doing, but will become funnier the drunker you and your friends get throughout the evening.

2) Ancient Greek Philosopher

Here’s a classic and easy costume. All you need is a toga (a tied bed sheet) and a tiara. Scout out a building with some vines on it to use for this crown. Feel free to make wise declarations in this get-up. It’s your democratic right! Finally, philosophy majors can feel useful. Now, someone will prob-ably try to steal your toga, so be, uh, prepared for that. Perhaps you could get a tan, go to the gym, and maybe trim some body hair. If you do end up losing your toga, try asking an attractive stranger if they have a spare bed sheet you could borrow from up in their room. Offer to go with them, of course.

WORDS: Connor Hill

FEATURES

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3) A Bunch Of Grapes

This costume will make for a good companion piece to the Philosopher costume, or stand strong on it’s own as a celebration of your love of The Grapevine. Cover yourself in all purple or blue balloons and attach them with tape or, if you have steady hands, safety pins. Wear blue or at least dark clothing that can be pierced without being damaged. Just make sure to bring some backup balloons with you in case a few too many pop and you look less like a bunch of grapes and more like some idiot with bits of balloon all over themselves. Also, don’t stand too near the fireplace.

4) Yoga Instructor

Here’s one for the guys. Specifically, guys who are pretty secure with their masculinity. All you need is a tank top (which, if you don’t have, can be bought in a pack of 3 at any department store for next to nothing) and yoga pants. You can ask your girlfriend for her Lulu Lemon pants. If you don’t have a girlfriend, it’s probably because you asked to wear her Lulu Lemon pants. Sorry about that. But honestly, I’m sure some girl in your life will be happy to oblige you, provided you don’t stretch them out too much. And even though you don’t often see this fashion statement, tight pants can look pretty good on a well-built dude. Just sayin’. Also, learn a few basic stretches to demonstrate during the evening and try to coax people to “open up their chakras”.

5) Canadian

Since you’re in Canada, amongst the hardest people to offend on the planet, you might as well take the opportunity to indulge in the stereotype. Jeans, tuques, flannel shirts, and down vests are cheap and readily available. Plus you almost certainly own one of these articles of clothing already. Bone up on your hockey trivia and master your accent the week before. Watch Bob & Doug McKenzie for inspiration. Bring a two-four of Canadian beer to the party and don’t let a bottle of it leave your hand, unless it’s to pick up another chilly one. Don’t worry about upsetting anyone. I promise you’ll be the coolest man or lady aboot town.

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THE HORN OF AFRICA:EAST AFRICAN DROUGHT

In East Africa a famine that was declared in July has thirteen million people starving. The food crisis which the UN officially declared a famine in two regions of Somalia also affects people in Kenya, Ethiopia, Djibouti, both North and South Sudan, and parts of Uganda. There has not been such a total lack of rainfall in sixty years and the drought has paralyzed the predominantly ag-ricultural communities across the region. The UN and various humanitarian organizations have responded and have been distributing food in certain areas. Other regions, including large parts of Somalia, which are occupied by Islamist rebels, have refused entry to aid organizations. The United Nations appealed for two and a half billion dollars (US) for the relief effort. As of printing sixty three percent of that goal has been reached, although the drought continues.Photo: EPA, The Economist

ISRAEL-PALESTINE:UNITED NATIONS VOTE

On September 23rd Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas formally submitted a proposal for the creation of a new Palestinian state. He appealed for support in the General Assembly in a speech unsurprisingly criti-cal of Israel, suggesting that only through statehood would the Palestinian people have the necessary lever-age to conduct peace negotiations as they are currently facing a “colonial military occupation”. Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu responded in an equally emotional fashion offering to resume peace talks im-mediately and rejecting a UN vote. President Barack Obama also addressed the General Assembly, criticiz-ing the move to declare statehood as a “short-cut” that could not replace an ongoing peace process. As we go to print, a vote is not expected for some time, but the United States has already announced it will veto the Palestinian application in the Security Council, which is required to pass for UN membership. Photo: Reuters, International Business Times

AROUND THE WORLD IN FOUR PARAGRAPHS

EUROZONE:EUROPEAN DEBT CRISIS

The International Monetary Fund and the European Union continue to struggle with the debt issues of sev-eral Eurozone States, particularly Greece. Despite having received one IMF-EU bailout package, fears that Greece will default on its sovereign debt continue to mount as plans. While a second bailout is in the works, the IMF has indicated that Greece must do more to reduce spending and increase the efficiency of its tax collection, while nearly continuous protests to the na-tion’s austerity programme continue. Other EU states, particularly Germany, which must bear a considerable portion of Greek debt as part of the bailout, are finding it difficult to continue justifying such measures. There are other European nations facing similar debt prob-lems, notably Italy, Portugal, Spain and Ireland, and the IMF has indicated that while its current lending ca-pacity can sustain Greece, it will be insufficient should other nations approach default.Photo: AP, DW-World

LIBYA:GOVERNMENTAL TRANSISTION

An announcement is expected regarding Libya’s first post Gadhafi government. The head of the National Transitional Council, Mustafa Abdul-Jalil, returned to Libya from New York where he was working with Libyan representatives and international experts in crafting some form of constitution. The cabinet was originally scheduled to be released earlier but dis-agreements regarding regional representation caused a delay. “All Libya will be united in this new govern-ment”, said Abdul-Jalil, although fighting continues as of late September, with rebels only just entering Colonel Gadhafi’s hometown Sirte, one of the last loyalist strongholds in Libya. Other nations are rally-ing around the Transitional Council, and many states and organizations have already recognized the interim government, including the United Nations. The NTC intends to hold democratic elections to a planned legis-lature within the next eight months.Photo: Daiily Juraat

AROUND THE WORLD IN FOUR PARAGRAPHSWORDS: Adam Schwartz, Ross Philip-Linden Fraser

PHOTO: Universe Today

NEWS

In an effort to break up a fight between two seventeen year old boys a London Police Sergeant shot one of them in the face with his taser. The officer gave no warning and the incident was recorded by a cell phone and posted online. The video clearly shows two young men in a fist fight on Dundas Street approached by an officer with his weapon drawn. The officer says nothing, shoots one boy the face, and then he and his partner scuffle with the other boy. Bystanders in the clip seem understandably concerned to see such a sig-nificant level of force used.

In a statement released the following day Brad Dun-can, the London Police Chief, said that the policy with tasers is to give warnings “when appropriate, but if not practical the officer is compelled to act”. Duncan did not address the officer’s decision to use a taser.

In 2009, a similar incident occured when a student was beaten by several officers in the Social Science building at the University of Western Ontario. This demonstration of excessive force, paired with the de-partment’s lack of response, bothered many students at the time. Since there have been other high profile incidents involving law enforcement brutality and tasers in Canada, this particular case will probably receive more attention. Perhaps forcing an apology from the offending officer.

As he is a minor, the victim’s name and condition were not given to the press.

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON POLICE BRUTALITY?

SEND SUBMISSIONS TO: OPINIONS.GRAPEVINE@GMAIL.COM

NEWS

LONDON BOY TASERED BY POLICE OFFICER

WORDS: Adam SchwartzPHOTOS: Zeus News

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There is only one thing to do when the temperature is dropping, the sky is turning grey and winter is on its way: eat fresh vegetables! What? You might be asking. That is absurd. Why would I eat fresh vegetables? Well, for one, there are more vitamins and nutrients found in freshly picked vegetables than in the stale fruits and vegetables found on the shelves of your local grocery store. But the other reason I am telling you to eat fresh vegetables is because for a limited time only (winter’s coming!) you can find a myriad of fresh produce at the many farmers’ markets located in London! Going out to the farmers’ market is a great way to give back to the community by supporting local farmers. It is also a great way to get outside of the Western Bubble by ven-turing somewhere that is outside of your regular visits to the bars on Richmond Row, or to the various malls around campus. If you have never been to the Covent Garden Market (130 King St), you are in for a treat – or several treats! There is something for everyone at the Covent Garden Market. Not only is there an indoor market open seven days a week, but there is also an outdoor farmers’ mar-ket every Thursday and Saturday from 8 am to 1 pm. At the outdoor farmers’ market you will find fresh pro-duce from local farmers, producers and growers; meat, dairy, baked goods, maple syrup, honey, nuts and other plants to enjoy. The indoor market has fresh produce, organic meat and fish, bakeries, delis, two restaurants, chocolate shops, coffee and teashops, candy and home-made ice cream. Chocolate Factory has homemade fudge and chocolates and Sweet Cakes has London’s

best cupcakes, with over 20 different flavours that are made fresh daily. These are just two of the many dif-ferent shops you will find within the Covent Garden Market. It is really easy to get to, just hop on any bus going downtown, south on Richmond. Get off at King Street, and you’re there!If you are up for a real adventure, then the Western Fair is for you! Located at 900 King Street, the London Fair Grounds holds 28,000 square feet of fresh and local foods. The market is open every Saturday from 8 am to 3 pm. Besides fresh fruits and vegetables; there is also fresh handcrafted bread, meats, organic produce and much more. On the second floor, there is an artisan’s market that features paintings, books, antiques, cloth-ing and other unique items for sale. If you would like to experience the Western Fair farmers’ and artisans’ markets but don’t want to venture that far, you are in luck because the Western Fair has two affiliate markets including Masonville Mall and Southdale (corner of Southdale Rd E. and Adelaide St. S.) Both markets are open every Friday and Saturday from 8 am to 2 pm and offer an array of fresh fruits and vegetables from over 40 local farmers and growers, as well as fresh roasted coffee and baked goods. Going to any one of these mar-kets is a great way to get out and explore what London has to offer.

Make sure to get out to a London farmers’ market before they close down for the winter season, and while you’re there make sure to grab a nice big pumpkin for Halloween!

LONDON’S FARMERS MARKETS

WORDS: Hillete WarnerPHOTOS: Riverview Market.Blogspot

LOCAL ISSUES

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DANIELLE CURTIS AND DAVE MCCREARY

Every student can name those teachers who really ig-nited their passion for learning. Those special educa-tors who made them laugh, who had fun while teach-ing, or who showed them a new way of looking at life. Each month, the Grapevine will be interviewing successful UWO graduates about their lives after they left the Western Bubble. This month’s alumni, Dan-ielle Curtis and Dave McCreary, are those exceptional teachers to a slew of students in Brantford, Ontario. Danielle and Dave currently teach at Brantford Col-legiate Institute, but for the 13 years leading up to this school year they taught at another Brantford school named after the great Canadian poetess Pauline John-son. There, they were the two pillars of a Media Technology program. They taught students the skills needed to work in today’s fast paced society, specifi-cally in media arts, and they did this with a drive and passion that allowed the students they taught to be-come interested in what they were learning. Dave and Danielle have a long history of working in media. In fact, they met and started dating while working at the Gazette on main campus twenty years ago this month. Dave graduated with an Honours Bachelor of Arts in Visual Arts and English in 1994 and then graduated from Althouse College a year later with a Bachelor of Education. Danielle followed in 1996, graduating with an Honours Bachelor of Arts in Visual Arts and then receiving her Bachelor of Education, also from Althouse College, the following year. The question is, what do these two teachers do that makes them so extraordinary to their students? For starters, they provide a space for each student to be unique. They supply opportunities for their students to combine their own interests with the things they are learning and apply the skills they learn in ways that they enjoy. “Teenagers are great, they are real people with senses of humour and a lot to offer their commu-nity. I love helping them find themselves and love see-ing them accomplish their goals,” says Danielle. Dave and Danielle are known by their students by the ease of their conversation and their ability to keep an open mind and be candid. Their students feel like they can ask for honest advice without being judged and treated like a child, which is a big deal for high school students who often feel like their voice is being suppressed. However, it is not just the students who are getting something out of their daily interaction. Dave says that

teaching is always exciting. “You really get to meet so many people every year,” says Dave,” and you never get bored.” Danielle says that she finds young people just very exciting to be around, “I just really like the daily exchanges with people who have the rest of their lives ahead of them,” she says.

Danielle credits both her and Dave’s work at The Gazette as the source for many of the skills that the needed to become the great teachers they are today. “The Gazette taught us about deadlines and working hard to produce something we could be proud of,” says Danielle. Both are concepts that they try to instil in their students, while still making learning fun. The en-courage creativity and thinking outside of the box, or in Dave’s case sometimes inside it.

Dave keeps busy with his work as an editorial cartoon-ist at Brant News in Brantford, Ontario. ”I enjoy fol-lowing the news and the local politicians, I like brain-storming and working out the ideas, and I especially love it when I finally get down to the actual drawing,” says Dave. He also shares his art with the community through numerous art shows, but he most often shares his love of drawing with his students, adding another dimension to the classes he teaches. Danielle and Dave’s ability to share their zeal for the things they do also seems to translate into their work outside of the classroom or studio and on to the rugby pitch. There, they have motivated young women to get involved with the popular sport. Danielle started play-ing rugby after graduating from Western. She began playing in a house league and eventually started up the women’s team at Pauline Johnson Collegiate, along with her husband. They coached the team for 13 years. “Coaching a sport you are passionate about is one of the most rewarding experiences you can have,” says Danielle. She will be coaching a midget boys’ rugby team this spring for Brantford Collegiate, possibly with Dave joining in the future. “It’s hard to stay away from the game you love!” says Danielle. Success can be measured by the money one makes, the position one holds, or the influence one has. Often, it is measured in other ways as well. For Danielle Curtis and Dave McCreary, it is measured by the people that they inspire, and to The Grapevine, it seems that this month’s alumni are very successful individuals.

YESTERDAY’S WESTERN STUDENTS TODAY

WHERE ARETHEY NOW

LOCAL ISSUES

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WORDS: Rachel Bell

have a pretty strong stomach. After all, I survived a year of eating in the Hu-ron cafeteria. Which is why I naively

agreed to go watch the 1st Annual Amateur Poutine Eating Championship at Smoke’s Pou-tinerie on Richmond Street on September 17. The 2nd Annual World Poutine Eating Cham-pionship is being held in Toronto on September 24 and this year, Smoke’s Poutinerie in London decided to hold an amateur competition. The winner of this competition will get a place in the amateur category at the event in Toronto. Moments before the event started, I spoke with Todd Page, the manager of the London fran-chise. Unsure of the difference between amateur and professional, Todd assured me that today’s contestants were just five average Joes who had filled out a ballot to be chosen to compete in Toronto’s amateur category, while the other contestants of the World Poutine Eating Com-petition were sanctioned ‘professional eaters’. The amateur first prize is free poutine for a year, while the professional first prize is $10,000. “Today, we’re just doing the first person to finish a large,” Page noted. “That’s about 640

grams, and then you have to add the gravy on top of that.” Apparently this is still nothing com-pared to what the pros scarf back, though. “The winner of the World Championship last year did 13 pounds in 10 minutes,” he said. I asked Todd if he could finish a large himself. “Are you kidding? I can’t even finish a small, not even after the worst drunken night,” he said, laughing. The contestants, four tall, thin young men, line up behind a table positioned in front of the store. The fifth guy is a no-show, and despite my en-couragement, my trusty photographer declines the challenge to take his spot. Soon, another tall young man jumps forward to fill the void, and we’re ready to go. The crowd counts down, Todd imparts some words of wisdom (“Have fun, and don’t die on me”) and they’re off. The first thing I notice are the kung fu levels of concentration on their faces. Professors dream of seeing this expression in exams. The atmos-phere is electric as forkfuls of steaming fries, cheese curds and gravy are shoveled into eager mouths. The crowd screams encouragement (“KEEP THE PACE!”) and I am strangely re-

minded of my highschool cross country days. Several contestants begin sweating with dis-tress, and my stomach starts to turn. It no longer looks like they’re enjoying this poutine. One contestant in a red hoodie is doing a small jig in time with the blaring radio music, and suddenly he triumphantly holds up his empty container. The crowd roars. We have a winner! I caught up with Ben Horgan of Newmarket, 4th year at the Ivey School of Business and newly-crowned poutine eating champion of London, moments after his victory. I asked him about his strategy going in. “Well I didn’t eat all day, so I would have lots of room. There was good mu-sic, and I just tried to stay relaxed and dancing. I got inspiration from the crowd - somebody said ‘Guy in the red shirt! Go faster!’ So I did.” I asked him if he’s had poutine at this establish-ment here before, and he told me yes, but never during the day. This seems to be a recurring theme among Western students. I left with a free poutine that I was unable to finish and a deep respect for people who enter eating competitions. They are far braver than I.

WORDS: Angela Easby; PHOTOS: Marie Elevaforte

POUT NEAN UNHOLY

CONSUMPTION OF

DANIELLE CURTIS AND DAVE MCCREARY

WHERE ARETHEY NOW

Stepping onto Western’s campus is like join-ing the throng of a busy city. Whether you’re hustling up University Hill or schlepping across Concrete Beach, UWO’s campus has a rhythm - and geography - all its own. With all of the people milling around, you hardly notice the majestic buildings, whether they’re modern and shiny or ivy covered oldies.

Stepping onto one of Western’s affiliate col-lege campuses, however, is much like entering the limits of a small town. Everyone seems to know one another, and even strangers will flash a friendly smile your way. The pace is slower, and there is time to look around and appreciate surroundings. At Huron, the expanse of green grass in the middle of campus invites you to sit down, relax, and maybe even get some read-ings done. At Brescia, the towering beauty of Ursuline Hall immediately catches your eye. And at King’s, the ivy covered buildings insist on capturing your attention. Each of the four campuses have something distinct to offer, and yet they are all compo-nents of one institution. So, how do the broth-ers and sisters of Western’s academic family get along? Six students from the different cam-puses were interviewed for this article. They were asked about their experiences at their own campus, and if they had any opinions about the others. The good news is, everyone interviewed seems to feel that they made the right decision in choosing which campus to at-tend. Here’s what else they had to say:

WORDS: Rachael Bell

BRESCIAHURON

KING’SWESTERN

WHERE DO YOU BELONG?

Main Campus students can take 1.0 class per year at an affiliate. Affiliate students can take 2.0 classes per year at Main or another affiliate

King’s was founded in 1954 as “College of Christ the King” and changed its name to King’s College in 1966 after becoming affiliated with UWO

Brescia was founded in 1919 as “Ursuline Col-lege” by the Ursuline female religious order and changed its name to Brescia College in 1963

Huron College, founded in 1863, was a founding institution for the Western University of London Ontario in 1878.

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Betsy is a third year Philosophy student at Main campus. She has taken a class at Brescia in the past and is currently enrolled in one at King’s, so unlike many other Western stu-dents she knows a little bit about the affili-ate colleges and how they work. Interestingly, however, the course she took at Brescia was mainly composed of Main campus students. When asked if she had any friends who attend affiliate colleges, she answered no, explaining that the affiliates’ students seem segregated from Main campus students. Julia is a second year Global Studies student at Huron. She ended up at Huron because her father works at UWO, and the Global Stud-ies program at Huron was what she wanted to pursue. She has taken courses at Main cam-pus, but explained that she preferred classes at Huron over Main because of smaller class sizes and more interaction with professors. At Huron, there are no TAs, so students are able to get more one-on-one time with profs. Andy is a second year BMOS student at Main campus. He has never taken a course at an affiliate, and admitted that he doesn’t know much about them, has no friends who attend affiliates, and believes that the experience of a Main campus student and an affiliate student is probably much the same. He chose to attend Western because of the school spirit, the fes-tive atmosphere, and to pursue his goal of at-tending the Richard Ivey School of Business.

Rachelle is between her first and second years at Brescia. She is a sociology student who transferred from Bishops when she learned about Brescia’s Community Development Program. She has taken courses at Main and Huron as well as Brescia, and while she found her class sizes at Main campus comparable to those at affiliates (unlike others), she main-tains that professors at the affiliates just seem to care more about their students. Although she had great things to say about the profes-sors and administration at Brescia, she did admit that she would consider going to Huron if they offered the Community Development Program, simply because it is more accessible. As for her opinion of Main campus? Rachelle believes the students who go there simply didn’t research the affiliates, and are more in-terested in partying than studying. Alex is another affiliate student who trans-ferred from another institution, this time Guelph. He is now in his second year of an English degree at Huron. He emphasized the differences between the affiliates and Main, explaining that the difference in class size and general population changes the atmosphere a great deal. At Main, “you’re seeing new peo-ple all of the time, it’s less intimate.” At Hu-ron, you get small class sizes and a true com-munity spirit that doesn’t exist on Main. While Rachelle, above, felt that living off campus separated her from that sense of community, Alex disagrees. He lives off campus but really appreciates the sense of community at Huron.

Paul is a fourth year political science student at King’s, and he agrees with Alex on a number of issues. He chose King’s because it packages itself with an identity of small class sizes and community spirit, and Paul happily explained that “it’s not just hype. It really lives up to that reputation.” He regularly visits Main to meet friends or study in Weldon library, but is hap-py to be a King’s student. What does all of this boil down to? Clearly, many more students would have to be inter-viewed to get a good sample of Western’s stu-dents, but from the interviews above, it seems people know what they want. It also appears that the Western Bubble is in full effect. While affiliate students engage in UWO’s campus culture, main campus students do not seem to know much about the affiliates, even those who have taken courses there. Each has its own atmosphere and campus cul-ture, but when it comes down to it, taking a class at an affiliate will give you the opportu-nity to get to know your professor, classmates, and another new corner of Western. There’s a place for everyone at Western, Brescia, Kings, and Huron, all you have to do is find it.]

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WORDS: Angela Easby

DR. RAMONA MIELUSEL

WHAT BROUGHT YOU TO HURON?That’s a good question! If I was joking, I’d say by chance- but I think it’s more than that. I’ve always wanted to work somewhere where peo-ple can meet and talk with each other easily. I’ve often dreamt of being able to know my students better, to know what interests them and to be able to help them in their academic career. The professors who truly affected me are the ones who took the time to get to know me and give me important advice for my life.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO WHEN YOU’RE NOT AT WORK?You’re going to be surprised, but when I’m not at the office, I’m still ‘working’. I read a lot. I know that reading is a part of my work, but it’s also a part of my life. Other than read-ing, I have a lot of other passions: I listen to music, I love dancing, travelling, learning new languages... I’m also an expert at wasting my time!IF YOU COULD CHANGE PLACES WITH SOMEONE FOR A WEEK, ALIVE OR DEAD, WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY?The first person that came to mind was Prin-cess Katie. (Laughs) I don’t know if it’s be-cause of all the media coverage of her mar-riage to Prince William or not. But since I was never born a princess I always wonder: “What is there for princesses to do during the day? Isn’t it boring to be a princess all the time?” There you go, if it ever happens for me I’ll

Dr. Mielusel is a full-time member of Huron’s Department of French and Asian Studies, and this is her first year at Huron. This year, she will be teaching French 1910, 2900, and 3900. As a result, she will interact with the majority of Huron students going through the French program. After complet-ing her undergraduate studies in Romania she obtained her Master’s degree at McMaster and then her doctorate from the University of Toronto. We caught up with Professor Mielusel to talk about coming to Huron, life outside her job, and her musings on princesses.

write to you to share my experiences.

WHAT’S YOUR BEST ADVICE TO STUDENTS WHO WANT TO IMPROVE THEIR FRENCH?My advice to students who want to improve their French (but this works for any language) is to practice, and to not be afraid to speak it in class as well as outside it with native speak-ers. It’s important to remember that we’ve all been there, even with our native language, and that making mistakes is human. There’s a popular Romanian saying that says “We learn a lot from our mistakes.” And in my life, I’ve never encountered a folklore expression from any culture that has let me down.

In addition to French and English, Professor Mielusel speaks Romanian, Spanish, and a lit-tle Italian. She has also recently begun learn-ing German. She’s unsure about her favourite meal, although she loves Italian, French, Mid-dle Eastern and Thai cuisines, as well as sushi. When she was younger she remembers eating dessert after every meal, although she admits to attempting to control herself a bit now. She is truly excited to be teaching at Huron and says that the best aspect of her work is the con-tacts and acquaintances she makes, as well as the ability to learn something new every day.

The Grapevine thanks Dr. Mielusel for her time and cooperation, and welcomes her warmly to Huron.

THE PROFESSOR PROFILE

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MY FAVOURITE BAND WAS… I’ve always enjoyed a lot of different music. When I arrived for my first 6-week attempt at undergrad, I was listening to a lot of The Clash and The Sex Pistols, which may help explain why I didn’t last very long. Over the years I spent as an undergrad, I got more and more into David Bowie, Talking Heads, Patti Smith, Bob Dylan, and Tom Waits, who remains my favourite living poet/musician. I also listened to a lot of 60s and 70s music to fill in my musical background. Really, there is far too much great music to even begin naming names.

MY FAVOURITE MOVIE WAS…Once again I saw lots of different things but I re-member being amazed by Blade Runner (1982) and Blue Velvet (1986) and seeing a lot of mov-ies at the New Yorker at York/Richmond, which showed classic and independent films back in the day before video, DVD, or digital.

MY FAVORITE PUBLICATION WAS…I read Rolling Stone and Premiere cover to cover every month.

MY PEERS AND I WERE WORRIED THAT…Many of the same worries as today (deficit, hor-rors in the developing world, disease) but precious little worry about how we were destroying the planet (which is probably why we caused so much destruction).

WHAT I COULDN’T FORESEE ABOUT TODAY’S WORLD WAS...

The way in which culture and information cir-culate. As yet this freedom hasn’t done much to bring about greater democracy, but I remain opti-mistic that it can.

THE MOST PRESSING POLITICAL CONCERN WAS…I was part of a very privileged and consequently, sadly indifferent generation that could afford to be apolitical. There were no wars that needed to affect my life, no 24-hour news forcing political awareness. There were people who were engaged but far too many of us who weren’t.

MY PLAN FOR THE FUTURE WAS… To someday stop answering the question “What are you going to do with an English degree?” but I did not have a plan for how that was going to happen.

I REALLY WISH I SPENT MORE TIME…Getting to know people who seemed so different from me that I didn’t approach them. Doing what I do for a living, I see there is much to be learned from and appreciated about each and every under-graduate here and I wish I would have taken the time to get to know even more people with more diverse stories.

I AM THANKFUL THAT I SPENT A LOT OF TIME…Enjoying the amazing opportunities rather than being stressed about the present or future. There is much work to be done, but many adventures to be experienced. I have no regrets about the work or the adventures.

WHEN I WAS AN UNDERGRAD

Most students have a limited relationship with professors. We spend time sitting through their lectures, writing essays hoping to appeal to their sometimes esoteric tastes, and take their exams knowing the results have heavy implications on our collective futures. With a relationship built on such highly pressurized circumstances, it’s easy for students to forget that these professors were once in the same exact position as we are. In order to provide students the opportunity to gain some personal insight into our professors, each month we will ask a professor a series of questions about their undergraduate experience. We hope this will help humanize the men and women who hold our academic fates in their hands.

Western’s professors get nostalgicFIRST UP: Dr. Neil Brooks, a professor in the English Department and Acting Associate Dean at Huron. He was an undergrad here at the University of Western Ontario during the 1980s.

WORDS: Jordan Sowunmi

DR. NEIL BROOKS

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SCARY MOVIES& THEIR DRINKING GAMES

IT’S THE GREAT PUMPKIN CHARLIE BROWN

Celebrate Halloween with the quirky Peanuts gang, a true classic that will leave you reeling for your childhood. Many people have fond memories of Halloween sprawled on the family room floor in a sugar coma and sorting through mountains candy. All the while mesmerized by the elusive tale of the Great Pumpkin; a holiday figure that is rumored to rise from the pumpkin patch and deliver gifts to well-behaved children across the globe.

THE DRINKING GAME:

• The movie’s plot is centralized by pumpkins, which means it is only appropriate to drink every time the word pumpkin is uttered (roughly seven beers per half hour).

• The Peanuts gang is young and always unsupervised, so drink every time they’re shown in risky and age-inappro-priate behavior. Example: When Charlie Brown is playing with scissors.

SCREAM

While Scream is not necessarily Halloween themed, the Ghostface killer donning a Halloween costume that has become a “go to” costume for many scrambling to find something to wear hours before heading to a Halloween party makes it worthy of its own drinking game. Scream is a classic scary movie with all of the fixings that should always be watched during the holiday!

THE DRINKING GAME:

• Drink when a telephone rings.• Drink when someone screams.• Drink whenever Dewey is insulted or does something stupid• Drink every time Kenny the camera man eats something.• Drink whenever Gail rants or screams at someone.

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THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS

Delve into Henry Selick’s enchanting and dark Halloween Town where the citizens consist of deformed monsters and ghouls under reign of the Pumpkin King, Jack Skellington. This unique fairytale follows Jack as he unsuccessfully at-tempts to bring the spirit of Christmas to the underworld. The re-watchability of this movie makes for an excellent drinking game!

THE DRINKING GAME:

• Drink every time Halloween is mentioned, including the opening scene during the song “This is Halloween.”

• When Jack discovers Christmas Land, he is overcome by his surroundings, take a drink every time he sings “What’s This?”

HALLOWEEN

One couldn’t compile a list of the top Halloween-themed movies without mentioning the infamous and apparently immortal -- the guy survived a decapitation for goodness sake -- Michael Myers in John Carpenter’s Halloween. Nothing quite screams Halloween more than a crazy per-son in a ghost-like mask on a murderous rampage during All Hallows Eve. After this film one can never quite looked at one’s little brother the same, or clowns for that matter.

THE DRINKING GAME:

• Take a drink every time Michael Myers tilts his head (you know you’re a goner when you get that oh so intimidating head tilt).

• The movie Halloween is set in Haddonfield, Illinois but was filmed in Pasadena. Take two drinks every time you spot a palm tree!

ARTS

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DC COMICS RELAUNCH EVERYTHINGUnprecedented in comics with ripples lasting well into the future: DC, one of the two major publish-ing companies in North American comic books, is essentially restarting every story they own. Batman, Superman, and every other DC title are starting again from issue 1 with a completely new canon.

Comics are a lot like episodic television with a new story coming out each week corresponding to the issue number normally in the top left corner. Issue number 237 could be part of a specific story arc that began in issue number 235 and ends in 238 but it is also part of an overriding story that began in is-sue 1 relating to other series in the same universe (titles owned by the same publishing house). DC is rebooting their entire line or universe so that no plot events from the modern era will be relevant in future stories. Superman will still be an alien from Krypton who can do anything just like Batman will remain the orphaned detective/vigilante in Gotham. Other well known details, such as Barbra Gordon being crippled and switching from Bat Girl to Ora-cle (Killing Joke 1988), Lex Luthor as US President (Lex 2000, 1999), and the many Crises that remod-eled the DC universe will no longer impact future DC plots. This is like a television network deciding to reboot all series over four years old on the same day. Reintroducing old characters with slight changes, exploring different plots with an identical tone: es-sentially creating newer versions of an older shows.

Many observe this to be a desperate opportunity to attract new readers by negating the complicated story continuity that has plagued the DC universe in recent years. While it can be compared to Marvel’s strategy of creating the alternate, more modernized, ‘ultimate’ universe to run alongside older titles, DC is wiping the slate clean. Despite this refusal to keep the old universe intact, DC’s story-telling approach is akin to that of Marvel’s reformation.When Brian Bendis created the ‘Ultimate Universe’ for Marvel he kept the basic character templates and reintroduced old story ideas in a more contemporary and kid-friendly setting. Regardless, Bendis’ world had all the familiar characters in a new and unpre-dictable environment. Fans can expect something similar from this new DC called ‘The New 52,’ as one of the publishing houses’ top writers Geoff Johns has repeatedly said “you won’t be able to recognize the DC universe,” while most of the new artwork re-leased mirrors the brighter colours and vivid details that characterized Marvel’s initial ultimate titles.

Fan reaction is mixed, most admit they will still buy their favourite DC titles, but they are annoyed

that the stories they have followed for years are ei-ther being scrapped or hastily resolved. In the new Batgirl title, for example, the events of The Killing Joke are merely alluded to. An unspecified miracle has allowed Barbra to walk again. On internet fo-rums fans are annoyed at the cut and paste narra-tive style, but, as always, seem keen to know where these new stories are going. Some new titles such as the rebooted Batwing are very similar to their earlier versions, prompting fans to question why there was a reboot. Critics have been praising Grant Morrison’s work on the new Superman in Action Comics 1 but one comic book store in North Caroli-na called The Comics Conspiracy is refusing to sell the title in protest of DC’s “unnecessary reboot” and “Grant Morrison’s liberal agenda”. DC Universe’s official blog headlines “creators and retailers line up to celebrate new 52” while other reactions are more modest. The most concentrated anger seems to be centralized by the decision to redraw Amanda Waller as a skinny Barbie doll type person. Fans find the new Waller unnecessary and a little sex-ist while the first Green Lantern Title “Triumph of the Will” has left many shaking their heads. Many comic fans question DC motives as they wait to read more of these essentially brand new titles be-fore passing judgment.

The inciting event that will officially transition the DC line into ‘The New 52’ will have occurred in the Flashpoint series by the time this article is pub-lished. Flashpoint is a series where the Flash runs through the fabric of time and space both causing and stopping events that reshape the DC universe, so ushering an entirely new reality is far from a stretch.

Artistic merit aside, this decision is significant for a number of reasons; it is a great opportunity to at-tract new readers, which could be the best reason for the massive re-launch. Also DC’s decision to reboot their entire line instead of starting a sepa-rate Universe, as Marvel did, points to the decline of book sales across the industry and a general shift towards digital media. All of the new DC titles will be available online in .cbr form and the new plots will affect DC’s internet role playing game Uni-verse Online. Most of the rhetoric coming form the DC offices repeats the word “simplicity” older fans like the idea of a less complicated universe, but with the entire past continuity being erased some worry the newer DC will shy away from heavy plot orien-tated stories in order to remain accessible.

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WORDS: Adam Schwartz, PHOTO: Joe Stone

ARTS

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Weeks before Woody Allen released Interior (1979), right after the still felt comical magnus opus that was Annie Hall, Woody Allen was struck with deathly panic attacks. For those of you knowing about of Woody Allen, or the re-occurring caricature he persisted to play, a full-blown panic attack would seem an everyday occurrence. It turn out it wasn’t. Interiors was Woody’s first drama, a homage to the master of the inner-human condition – or at least the inner-Swedish condition --Ingmar Bergman. Allen was serially afraid of what the critic would say, thinking that he had made Edge of Night, a network soap opera, instead of Long Day’s Journey Into Day, a reputable and pro-found drama.

Interiors revolve around three sisters (Woody is often lauded for his understanding of the female psyche). Their mother, who suffers from chronic depression, is in and out of the hospital from suicide attempts. Their father, now divorced from their mother, is plan-ning on marrying a new woman. Of the sis-ters, Renata (Dian Keaton) the novelist, Flyn (Kristin Griffith) the actress, and Joey (Mary Beth Hurt) the sister struggling to find her own

talent, each one tries to come to grips with their mother’s disease, their resentment towards their father’s abandonment, their xenophobic resistance of a new mother entering their life, and their personal struggles with meaning, love and – very poignantly -- death.

When watching Interiors one cannot deny the extreme influence that the director Ingmar Bergman had on Woody Allen. The quiet lone-liness of the Hampton beachside, and the focus on the human face as the most complex land-scape, makes Interiors akin to Autumn Sonata and Scenes from a Marriage.

You should watch this film. It will utterly change your conception of Woody Allen as just a comic, and truly open your eyes to his genius and why in years to come he will be heralded as a Dickens, a Chaucer, and maybe even a Goethe of the human condition.

FACT YOUR ASS: A Cool Fact About The Movie

The song “Death of an Interior Decorator” by Death Cab for Cutie is based on the plot of In-teriors.

CULTURE YOUR

WORDS: Patrick Barfoot, Owner & Creator of We Eat FilmsCheck out weeatfilms.com for more articles!

ASS :INTERIORS (1979)

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FALL REVIEW

Every year broadcasters premier numerous television pilots, most of which are cancelled after only one season. This year is no exception. The fall television season is upon us and there is a wide array of new series premiering. How many of which audiences will end up watching is still debatable, but sure enough one will have to make it to Season Two. Here are the odds of what show that might be.

PERSON OF INTEREST

CHANCES OF A SEASON TWO: 1/5

A thriller from J.J. Abrams (Super 8) and Jonathan No-lan (The Dark Knight), Person of Interest has great po-tential with such high production value. However, like with most season long story arcs, the show will have to find and captivate viewers early in the season as to keep audiences watching. Lost did this well, last year’s Rubicon on AMC did not.

FINAL THOUGHT: Look out for J.J. Abrams’ Alcatraz on FOX this spring.

PAN AM

CHANCES OF A SEASON TWO: 1/8

Cashing in on the success of Mad Men, this 1960’s period drama focuses on the lives of pilots and flight attendants working for Pan American World Airways. Big names like writer Jack Orman (ER) and director Thomas Schlamme (West Wing) got this show off the ground, but it will be near impossible to escape the shadow of Mad Men.

FINAL THOUGHT:While Mad Men is in hiatus, Pan Am is taking its Sun-day night time slot.

WORDS: Andrew Sercombe

TV

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NEW GIRL

CHANCES OF A SEASON TWO: 2/1

Zooey Deschanel (500 Days of Summer) and a time slot following Glee Tuesday nights on FOX fair well for The New Girl, but if the series is to go a second season, how long can Deschanel fend off movie offers before leaving the show?

FINAL THOUGHT: A time slot following Glee will attract an audience for any show.

SABURGATORY

CHANCES OF A SEASON TWO: 1/20A divorced father and his teenage daughter move from New York City to the tidy suburbs in this comedy. It doesn’t appear promising, and will likely be very for-gettable, lost in a crowd of similar shows. There is bet-ter comedy on TV.

FINAL THOUGHT: However, Cougar Town and Desper-ate Housewives have already proven that there is an audience for this type of comedy.

ARTS

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And “Must See’s” Returning This Fall….PARKS AND RECREATION – “Literally”, the best show on television last year.COMMUNITY – So many guest stars. Look out for Michael K. Williams (The Wire) teaching Biology.THE WALKING DEAD – Returning just in time for Halloween, but without series developer Frank Darabont.MODERN FAMILY – Fresh off an Emmy clean up. Audiences need more feel good comedies as good as Modern Family.

FALL REVIEWTV

UP ALL NIGHT

CHANCES OF A SEASON TWO: 1/4

Will Arnett hasn’t been funny for a long time, but with Up All Night, he attempts to rediscover his magic. “Feel good comedies” are in high demand. Much like Modern Family, Up All Night could find an audience amongst this season’s single camera sitcoms.

FINAL THOUGHT: Producer Lorne Michaels (Saturday Night Live) has collected an impressive cast. This, however, leads to high expectations.

TERRA NOVA

CHANCES OF A SEASON TWO: 3/4

On the verge of extinction in the year 2149, humans travel back in time to colonize earth and establish the human race among dinosaurs. Fox appears dedicated in developing the show, and it is almost certain that it will not be abandoned mid season after such a financial commitment. But with such a demanding production budget, and with out an audience, the series will not be financially feasible for a second season if it was to fail.

FINAL THOUGHT: Producer Steven Spielberg.

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DRINK UP!frozen butterbeer WORDS: & PHOTO: Angela Herring-Lauzon

For all of you Harry Potter fans out there, or for anyone who enjoys delicious alcoholic bever-ages, do I have the drink for you! It’s easy to make, and absolutely yummy. Untraditionally, this unique recipe calls for cream soda as a base, which gives the drink a slight ‘Pepto-Bismol’ colour [to accompany it’s lovely taste]. In addition, to accomodate shallow student pockets, one can substitute caramel Baileys for butterscotch flavored schnapps. Pour a glass and curl up with a good friend or that special someone while viewing one of the Harry Potter films or any good flick. Enjoy!

Ingredients:

For the butterbeer: 1 1/2 cups cream soda 6 tablespoons butterscotch schnapps/caramel Baileys 2 cups iceFor the foamy topping: 6 tablespoons heavy cream 1 tablespoon butterscotch schnapps

Directions:Combine the cream soda, Baileys and ice in a blender. Blend until slushy. Pour concoction into a glass or mug. In a small bowl, combine heavy cream and Baileys. Using an electric mixer, whisk together until almost whipped. You want the cream mixture to be slightly loose - not as firm as whipped cream. Top the butterbeer with the foamy topping and serve immediately.

Serves 2

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LIFESTYLE

LIFESTYLEWHY I WISH MY LIFE WERE A BIOLIFE RPG

WORDS: Brent Holmes PHOTOS: Aistis Cepinskas

I have been sitting around my house switching between Dragon Age 2 and Mass Effect this summer and I realized that my life would be so much better as a BioWare RPG.

The most obvious reason being that unlike a player character in a BioWare RPG, I do not have a plethora of attractive females sporting variations of British accents pin-ing for my affections. Not only that, once my pimping PC has slept with them, I get achievements congratulating me on my accomplishments. This is drastically different from my real life, where I have recently discovered that having awards to prove the extent of my nerdy nature is about as helpful to any romantic involvement as heavy ar-mour is to a mage’s magic ability. In real life, one is more likely to get 50 Herpes score points for fulfilling a romantic subplot.

However, life in a BioWare RPG has much more logical advantages than simple suc-cess in romantic entanglements. The worlds of BioWare RPGs always have good econ-omies. No matter how bad things look, there will always be a job for characters playing like the Second Coming of Christ or a psychotic Ayn Rand fanatic. Maybe finding a job in the real world would be easier if I wasn’t playing BioWare RPGs, but in these games you have all the money you could ever need, and absolutely nothing that you need to spend it on. (This is mainly due to the fact that you can steal most of it.)

Some complain that your companions in BioWare RPGs are whiny, annoying dipshits who can’t do anything for themselves and are perfectly willing to open up and start blabbing about their personal issues. Frankly, I wish my friends were more like these characters. Honestly. Despite the inconvenience of everyone coming to you with per-sonal issues when you are busying trying to save the world from darkspawn, reapers, or Sith Lords, I feel so much better about myself every time I play these games. If every one of my friends existed with the sole purpose of expressing their inferiority in com-parison to me, I wouldn’t have to deal with any of my own social or self-esteem issues.

Prime example of the last idea is how much fun it is to bankrupt corporations or kill racists in BioWare RPGs. Bioware has found that sweet spot, only rivaled by Nazi Zombies, where it’s morally okay to okay to maim, torture, brutalize, or kill enemies based solely on their primitive and evil ideologies. (I look forward to the possibility of terrorizing Vampire Confederates if they ever make a video game of Abraham Lincoln Vampire Slayer.) The best part is that I very rarely get criticized for these actions by any of the aforementioned companions as many of them are one of the victimized groups.

However, the best part of having life as a BioWare RPG would be how hard it is to be an asshole in these games. Being an asshole in real life is easy! There are plenty of annoying and whiny individuals that one sees on a daily basis. In BioWare RPGs it is excruciatingly difficult to be mean to them. There is honestly nothing worse than hav-ing to listen to a child beg for his life because I want to see how messed up my face will become when I max out my renegade meter.

So whether you are destroying Star Forges, fighting arch demons, or being mind raped by blue aliens in space at 3:00 in the morning, sleep with the knowledge that no matter what you do in real life, it will never be as awesome going toe to toe with Darth Malak as your level 20 Jedi Guardian.

The Afterthought: Another advantage of BioWare RPGs is the fact THAT THEY FIN-ISH THEIR GAMES BEFORE RELEASING THEM. I’m looking at you Obsidian Entertainment! Thanks for ruining Knights of the Old Republic for me!

BEDTIME SNACKSWORDS: Angela Easby PHOTOS: Ross Linden-Fraser

It’s a common belief that turkey gives you a wonderfully warm, drowsy feel-ing after the annual gorge-fest that is Thanksgiving. But most people don’t know why, or that there are other foods with the same effect. There are, in fact, an entire group of foods that can induce this calm, relaxed feeling-- some with an even stronger effect than turkey.

According to Christopher Wanjek of www.livescience.com, turkey contains tryptophan, an essential amino acid that has been linked to the production of sero-tonin, which is known for regulating sleep patterns. Tryptophan can be found at vary-ing levels in all meats, as well as in chocolate, bananas, mangoes, oatmeal, cottage cheese, chickpeas, peanuts, and soy products.

However, tryptophan occurs in much smaller levels than other amino acids, notes Wanjek. And if there is a reason for the sleepy effect of Thanksgiving turkey, it is probably due more to the quantity of carbohydrates consumed than the turkey itself. As Anne Marie Helmenstine explains in “Does Eating Turkey Make You Sleepy?” on About.com, tryptophan requires carbohydrates in order to work effectively and give that drowsy feeling. When we eat carbohydrates the pancreas releases insulin, which causes the other amino acids that compete with tryptophan to leave the bloodstream. And the tryptophan from your turkey, banana, or cottage cheese is left alone to syn-thesize serotonin which helps send us off to sleep.

In addition to these foods, there are all sorts of drinks that will have you yawning as well. There is the obvious traditional choice of warm milk, which again contains tryptophan. If you want something a little more exciting than warm milk, a glass of red wine will also do the trick. According to “Can’t Sleep? Have a Glass of Red Wine” on Dailymail.co.uk, grape skins contain high levels of melatonin, a hor-mone that helps regulate circadian rhythms and prepares the body for sleep. Grape skins are removed in the making of white wine, thus causing the melatonin rates to be significantly lower in white wines. The highest levels of melatonin were found in Barolo and Barbaresco wines, with high levels in Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot grapes as well.

Of course, since alcohol is a depressant, a certain quantity of anything will eventually send you to sleep. However, the Grapevine reminds students that this is by no means a positive sleeping technique. Just eat your cottage cheese and carbohy-drates, please.

that send you to sleep

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GRAPEVINE PHOTO CONTEST

Each issue, the Grapevine will hold a photo contest

showcasing the talent that our university has to of-

fer (faculty and staff are encouraged to submit their

work too!) The best submissions will be featured in

the next issue of the Grapevine!

This issue’s theme is:

TREES

Show us what you can do with Fall colours

and light in photos of trees, forests and foliage.

Submissions will be judged by the Grapevine’s Photo Staff, and can be either

in black and white or in colour. Please send us shots taken prior to publication

as well. Send submissions with your name and the date it was taken (and

a title, if the photo has one) to photography.grapevine@gmail.com. If you’d

like to join the Grapevine’s photo team, email our Photo Editor at rlinden2@

uwo.ca. GOOD LUCK!

want your ad here?

email kat.j.lat@gmail.com for rates and info

Tuesday - Saturday 11-7 and Sunday 12-6Students get 15% off

dear brit,I noticed this really cute girl in my bio class. Would it be

creepy to just ask her out after class? I want to get to know her, what should I do?

sincerely,fearful frosh

dear fearful frosh,GO FOR IT!!! Don’t hold back because you think it is

creepy, she’ll probably be impressed that you had the balls to ask her out while sober (a rarity in university). What is creepy is having a night out with your friends at Jacks only to have some random guy start thrusting you from behind in an attempt at dancing. It’s rude and kind of offensive.

Next time you’re in biology class, sit next to her during the lecture, fib and say you missed last class and is she would mind sending you the notes. Or crack a joke about some hung over student snoring through the lecture. Maybe even ask her if she’d like to form a study group. Plan to meet up in the library or go for coffee and the two of you can spend hours bonding over your text books, and maybe playing footsie under the table! How scandalous! This way you can take it slow and really get to know each other in a more private setting, while getting good grades from all that studying the two of you will be doing ;).

DEAR BRITWORDS: Brittany Linton

PHOTO: Andrew Sercombe, Ross Linden-FraserSend submissions to

Askbrit.Grapevine@gmail.com!

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dear brittany,My boyfriend and I just started university at two

seperate schools. The distance is already killing me not seeing him everyday. Do you have any tips on surviving a long distance relationship?

lonely and going looney mustang

dear lonely and going looney mustang,

My boyfriend and I went through the same thing three years ago (he went to Carleton and I went to West-ern) so I know where you’re coming from. The two big-gest hurdles that you have to understand is that A) you’re never going to see each other as much as you’d like to and B) you’re not going to talk to each other on the phone as often as you’d like. Harsh? I know. But once you and your boyfriend both realize this, any building tension in your newly distant relationship will vanish and you won’t be as stressed. What you can do is throw yourself into meeting new people to develop a strong support system so that you don’t feel so lonely. Join groups or clubs. I played in-ner tube water polo my first year and it was a blast! The people you meet at university will undoubtedly be some of your best friends, so I guarantee that you will regret it if you sit in residence pining over your boyfriend. You cannot change that you go to separate schools, so stop worrying about it, get out there and have the best univer-sity experience you possibly can! I’m not saying to forget your boyfriend. It’s important to make phone dates ev-ery night, and definitely see each other a couple times a month, trust me it’ll be worth the wait! My boyfriend and I are going five years strong, so it’s definitely possible!

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dear brit,The other night, I met a guy at a bar and actually ended up

giving him my number (a first for me). Now he keeps texting me late at night, and it’s only ever about one thing…it bothers me that I’m only being considered as a booty-call, but at the same time I like the attention. What should I do?

cheers, confused cutie

dear confused cutie,

If you’re looking for the same thing, a meaningless and no strings attached fling, then text him back and let him know that you’re interested. Let’s face it; some people believe that univer-sity is one big giant excuse to sleep with anything that moves, without worrying whether or not their parents will barge in mid thrust. But you said so yourself, you’re bothered that he only wants you for a late night booty-call. So forget about this guy, he’s just a huge waste of your time! This isn’t the type of attention you deserve, nor are his late night texts the basis for a solid and meaningful relationship. So get it out of your head that these series of mindless texts are going to evolve into something more, because he probably has a whole list of girls on reserve in case one of you ditches on the evening. He is not going to change.

Find a guy that will text you mid-afternoon to see how your day at school is going, or whether or not the two of you would like to meet up at Weldon to study. You’ll get way more fulfill-ment out of it. So please don’t sell yourself short for immediate gratification by texting this guy back, hold out for the real deal!

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HALLOWEENpick up linesWORDS: Angela Easby

They may get you slapped… but it’s Halloween, so anything goes. If we’re going to wear ridiculous costumes, we may as well have ridiculous lines.

1. Hey baby, are those fangs real or are you just happy to see me?2. That costume looks complicated. Need help taking it off?3. Hey pumpkin - I bet I can put a smile on your face. 4. I hear this house is haunted… we better stick together. 5. You’re giving me shivers… and not because of that costume. 6. Are you supposed to be Lara Croft? Because I’d love to raid your tomb…7. You look dead sexy.8. Going as an angel isn’t fair. You were supposed to dress up. 9. Mmm baby, you decompose like no one I’ve ever seen before. 10. Wanna find out what I turn into at midnight?11. Thank you. Why? For making me believe Halloween is a sacred holiday. 12. Ever done it with a (insert your costume here)?13. I don’t know what the trick is, but you certainly are a treat.14. I would have been a mummy if I’d known I would get wrapped up in you. 15. We should have gone as ghosts… I’d let you under my sheets.

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1. You’re sitting in the library when you notice a cutie at the table across from you. Do you:

a) Walk over, introduce yourself, and tell them their lips are the hottest things since Scarlett Johansson’s photo scandal?b) Catch their eye and smile, hoping you grab their interest?c) Spend the next two hours peeking at them over your books when you’re sure they won’t notice?

2. It’s Tuesday, and you get asked out on a date for Friday. You:

a) Counter-offer. Why wait? How about tonight!?b) Haven’t made plans yet, so you agree to a ca-sual dinner.c) Already have plans for Friday. Weldon is calling your name!

Which Western

mascot best fits your dating

person-ality?WORDS: Rachael Bell

Are you a Wild Mustang, Balanced Bee, or Bashful Beaver?

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3. You’ve been flirting with a classmate since the beginning of the semester. Finally, they ask you out for a drink. You suggest:

a) Drinks at your place, making sure your room-mates are out for the night.b) The Martini Bar. Not too intimate, but you can have some one-on-one time to see how things go.c) The Spoke. You can head there right after class, and being on campus means there’s always an ex-cuse to get away.

4. Your significant other wants to do the deed in a public place. You react by saying: a) “Let’s do it!” b) “Um... how public were you thinking?”

c) “No. Freaking. Way.”

5. You want to surprise your new love with an especially sexy evening. You arrange:

a) An array of naughty toys, message oils, and games to choose from.b) A fun costume... with a prop or two.c) A new set of under-wear that will knock their socks (and everything else) off.

6. You’re working up a sweat at Campus Rec when you notice someone on the next treadmill checking you out. You decide to make a move when you both finish up by saying:

a) “I’m guessing you’re heading to the showers... Mind if I join?”b) “Next time we get sweaty together, we should make it more fun.”c) “Want to grab a smoothie with me after we change?”

7. You and your date are jamming to Rick McGhie at the Spoke. You’ve been flirting madly all night, so you decide to take things one step further by:

a) Pulling them into the bathroom and locking the door.b) Kissing them full on, regardless of who’s look-ing. c) Putting your hand on their leg to see how they react.

8. It’s Saturday night at Jacks. You’re having the time of your life on the dance floor, when suddenly you have a dance-partner. You:

a) Continue to have the time of your life, but with much more grinding and a question in mind - “Your place or mine?”b) Let it continue for the next few songs, before ask-ing if they want to grab a drink and exchange names.c) Give your friends the “Let’s hit the bathroom ASAP” signal.

If you chose mostly option A, you're a Wild Mustang. You know what you want, and you're not afraid to go get it... no matter who's watching.If you chose mostly option B, you're a Balanced Bee. You can go after what you want, but you like to make your partner do some of the work too.If you chose mostly option C, you're a Bashful Beaver. You prefer to be chased, not to do the chasing.

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As the new school year rolls around, new students begin new classes, build new relationships, and find new identities. Perhaps you choose to mark this new transi-tion, inking your transformation into the flesh you will carry with you throughout your life. In case you didn’t pick up, I am talking about tattoos!

Every year millions of people from every corner of the world flock to conventions, festivals and shops to celebrate the oldest, most widely practiced form of body art in the world.

For some, this experience could grow to be an un-pleasant memory, or future regret. This could happen for many reasons; the client picked an unskilled artist, an unsanitary shop, or rushed into an idea without giving it the proper time and thought their body and a tattoo deserves. For others – getting a tattoo could be the best decision they’ve ever made and find the tattoo just makes them, them.

As a tattoo enthusiast and devoted collector, I am sharing this information to inform everyone who is interested in getting a tattoo, but may not be sure where to start the search for the right artist. To help you narrow down your search, here is a short “Need to Know” on tattoos.

• WHAT IS A TATTOO?- A tattoo is a form of body art, created when a

needle is inserted into the second layer of skin (dermis) for the purpose of injecting ink to create a permanent design under the skin. Inks are made from different co-loured carbon pigments.

• WHAT ARE THE RISKS?- A tattoo is a surgical procedure; therefore

there are associated risks, if the artist and client do not take the proper precautions to avoid contamination. The use of dirty or reused needles can lead to infections, such as Hepatitis and other blood borne pathogens. Any infec-tion will also certainly affect the permanent appearance of the tattoo.

- Allergies (some people are actually allergic to certain brands of tattoo inks). If you are allergic to the ink the artist is using, the ink will be rejected by the body, disfiguring the tattoo. However, this is a very small percentage of people.

- Scarring can occur, if the tattoo was not ap-plied properly. On the client’s part, scarring can also occur during the healing process if the new tattoo is touched with unclean hands or picked at. A tattoo will scab and become very itchy, don’t pick at it! You want a good tattoo!

- You need to research your artist and look into their past work. If you find their tattoos become faded it is because the tattoo artist did not tattoo deep enough and only hit the first layer of skin – resulting in a disappear-ing tattoo. If your tattoo becomes blurry or the ink seems to “bleed” under the skin it is because the tattoo artist pressed too hard and went into a deeper layer of fatty tissue which does not hold the ink in place properly.

• WHAT PROCEDURES SHOULD MY ART-

IST FOLLOW, TO INSURE A CLEAN AND QUAL-ITY TATTOO?

- Your artist has a great responsibility in in-suring you receive a clean and good quality tattoo. All though it is not required, most reputable artists will have a blood-borne pathogen, and cross contamination certifi-cation.

- The artist should always wear a new pair of medical gloves, as well as use only a pre-packaged, ster-ile, ONE-TIME use needle, that they should assemble in front of the client, the machine and tubes should also be appropriately wrapped to avoid contact with the other instruments.

- Lastly, every tattoo shop MUST be equipped with an autoclave; it is a container that blasts highly pres-surized heat to sanitize the tattoo machine after every use.

Although there are more than a dozen tattoo shops in

London, I have chosen to exclusively provide informa-tion on three shops which, in my opinion, are best and most reputable in London [Criteria based on my own customer experiences with two of the shops, that said, every artist’s portfolio speaks for themselves.]. Wher-ever you choose to get inked make sure you do your re-search and feel confident going into the experience.

(Please keep in mind this does not mean that other shops are not reputable as many talented artists inhabit London.)

INFORMED INK!

WORDS: SHAUN NUGENT

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Artist: Sean Strouse- Hanger 18

Artist: Dave Schultz- Hanger 18

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SAVE TIME, ORDER ONLINE!WORDS: Whitney Slightham

PHOTO: Walker’s Food Products

Since the grand opening of Grocery Checkout’s Fresh Market location in the basement of the UCC last April, the local company has continued to expand across Ontario. Rooted in the ideology that grocery shopping should be easy and accessible, Grocery Checkout not only offers over 10,000 products, ranging from fresh produce to household items; but also provides students with an efficient, and affordable, online grocery delivery service.

How does it work? You simply select your order online at grocerycheck-out.com, pay via online debit or credit card, select a delivery time that accords to your schedule, and save yourself from the struggle of drudg-ing through London’s sleet and snow with that hefty bag of KD and bacon this winter.

Created by Nathan Felder over two years ago, Grocery Checkout has since evolved into a handy outlet for students. The recent establishment of the Fresh Market in the UCC marks a shift in infrastructure that fur-ther allows the company to “accommodate all of your grocery shopping needs,” states Greg Huxley, a manager at Grocery Checkout. “Customer feedback is an essential part of our business, as we are always looking for ways to improve the services we offer,” Huxley continues.

Although they do not currently carry organic produce, their team is con-stantly seeking new suppliers and products to better accommodate their clientele. This includes providing an array of items for alternative diets, including gluten-free, lactose-free, vegetarian, and vegan items.

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Thanksgiving marks the first holiday of the school year. The long weekend offers students the chance to haul 6 weeks of dirty party-stained laundry home, bask in the glory of a home-cooked turkey dinner, and, often, the op-portunity for freshmen to breakup with their high school sweethearts face to face. I am, of course, refer-ring to the Turkey Dump. Yes fro-shies, it is very real and no one is safe. You’re at a new school, filled with some of the hottest young people around. It’s tempting, and extremely natural for your mind to wander to those forbidden places.

University is supposed to mark the best years of your life, and at times you may feel like a re-lationship back home is holding you back. But, before jumping in the sack with two hot (female or male) blondes from down the hall to pursue any experimental fan-tasies you may have, first decide whether high school sweetheart is someone you can see yourself with down the road. If so, perhaps you should leave the experiment-ing to your Physics 101 class and prepare for the, oh so dreaded, long distance relationship! Dum dum dummmm.

As a fourth-year student having just celebrated my five year an-niversary with my boyfriend, I am a strong believer that one can

maintain their long distance re-lationship and still have the Uni-versity experience they’ve always dreamed of. Call me crazy, but my boyfriend and I always knew, even when we started dating in high school, that we wanted to go to separate universities. Now you may be thinking “Is she really that dumb to leave her tes-tosterone filled boyfriend behind in a residence filled with smokin’ girls?” YES I AM. This is your first lesson; if your high school sweetheart really loves you, then they are not going to cheat on you. So please stop worrying about it and have the time of your life at University with all of the amazing people you meet! All of this wor-rying will cause the two of you to fight and push each other away. In the worst case, if they do cheat on you, then thank GOODNESS you found out about it and were able to dump that scumbag over Thanksgiving!

The biggest hurdle that all couples enduring the long distance rela-tionship must overcome is coming to understand the following:

a) You won’t see each other as much as you’d like to. Nothing will satisfy those long, lazy days you once had together in high school or over the summer. b) You’re not going to talk to each

Have an inquiry about your relationship? Ask Brit - she’s been through it all. E-mail your question to askbrit.grapevine@gmail.com and have it answered in our next issue!

TO BE OR NOTTO BE (TOGETHER)

WORDS: Brittany Linton

other as often as you’d like.

In my freshman year, I found these two subjects were often the source of our arguments. You and your partner are both going to be busy. Between bonding with floor mates, making friends, classes, and cramming for finals, it is extremely difficult to satisfy the two, previ-ously stated, components. Once each party comes to this realiza-tion, things become a lot easier. Our typical day involves texts back and forth during the day and then a half hour phone conversation at night. We also try to see each other once or twice a month. If he wants to hang out with his buddies or I want to go the bar with the girls one night, then we’ll talk a little longer the next day. Just let life happen.

Relationships aren’t meant to be hard. Yes, you’re going to miss your high-school or summer sweet heart to death, but it shouldn’t be eating away at you. If you put in the effort to talk on the phone reg-ularly and visit each other at least once a month, it will truly pay off. But PLEASE spend the rest of your weekends at University hav-ing the best experiences of your life – you’ll regret it if you don’t. And trust me, the extra effort seri-ously pays off each time you see your loved one.

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This fall season you’re going to need to channel the 70’s while developing your on-trend wardrobe. On the runway this spring, when all of the major designers showcased their Fall/Winter 2011 collections, several designers embraced the retro-chic vibe associated with the past decade. The color palette they used is heavily influenced by the season, autumn, as variations of brown, red, orange, rust, pink, grey, white and green dominated the Fall collections. Before revamping your entire wardrobe, remember that fashion is all about layering and innovation. Be creative with what you’ve already got in your closet before spending half of your savings for the school year. Here are a few key trends to watch out for:

PLEATS. Pants, dresses, jackets, etc. Pleating is edgy, yet soft and a major influence in this season’s trends.

FAUX-FUR. Suiting the weather, faux-fur clothing plays a large role in many of the collections from the world’s biggest fashion houses this season.

BELL-BOTTOMS AND WIDE-LEG PANTS. Now that skinny jeans are so common – tight-fitting pants are no longer making a statement about your fashion sense. Sticking with the 70’s inspiration, bell-bottoms and wide-leg pants are making a fierce come-back. Try to lean away from the domi-nance of the slim cut and embrace this new, fun style.

SHEER MAXI-DRESSES. Following the trends of this spring and summer, sheer maxi-dresses and skirts have made their way into fall and winter. Pair them with some warm stockings and you’ve got a weather-appropriate way to incorporate that breezy summer dress into your winter wardrobe.

WORDS: Katherine HopePHOTOS: style.com

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FALL TRENDS - RTW 2011

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For men this season it’s less about channeling the 70’s and more about finding that perfect suit. Lucky for you, the suit trends this season are kicking off what looks to be a new style that will be followed for many years to come. This way you can feel comfortable buying an incredible suit, knowing that you will be ahead of the fashion game and on trend in 2012 and beyond. Think of it as an investment.

While you’re out selecting that perfect suit, there are a few key things to keep in mind: 1) keep the trousers slim fitting and 2) aim for structured broad shoulders. As for a color scheme – your reign is fairly free. Don’t be scared to mix and match the colours and patterns of your jackets, trousers, shirts, and ties. Be adventurous and innovative.

As far as casual wear goes, layering is elementary. Start by building your wardrobe with a few pairs of basic trousers, t-shirts, button-down shirts, blazers and denim. Then, get creative by layering signature chunky-knit sweaters and cardigans, scarves, vests, patterned blazers and pants, jew-elry, footwear, etc. Don’t be afraid to stand out and express yourself.

WHILE YOU’RE OUT SELECTING

THE PERFECT SUIT, THERE ARE A FEW THINGS

TO KEEP IN MIND: 1) KEEP THE TROUSERS SLIM FITTING

AND 2) AIM FOR STRUCTURED

BROAD SHOULDERS.

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FIVE WAYS TO AVOID THEFRESHMAN FIFTEEN

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Cafeteria food is convenient and often tasty – but that usually comes at a price. Main entrées found at most cafeterias on campus are not only high in fat and calories, but are also huge contributors to the freshman 15. However, this significant ca-loric intake can be greatly attributed to the monstrous portion sizes the caf dishes out. The solution to this issue is quite sim-ple – eat less. You don’t need to clear your plate despite what you may have been told growing up. When you feel yourself growing full – stop.

First years often find themselves awake a lot later than the rest of the world for some odd reason. Because of this, first years often find themselves snacking a lot more than usual. Late night trips to the cor-ner store, a quick call to Domino’s, shawarma after the bar; it all adds up – the calories that is. Try your best to just say no to sugary and fatty snacks in the evening. When “no” just doesn’t seem to be an option – make a conscious effort to watch your portions. Split a chocolate bar with a friend instead of eating the entire thing yourself, or cut yourself off at once slice of pizza. Be aware of what you’re putting in your mouth.

30 minutes, three times a week – that’s all it takes to keep in shape (if you’re not stuffing your face that is). Western has a brand new recreational facility equipped with a variety of machines and spaces ready for you to use. Plus it’s free! You really have no excuse to not get some exercise while you’re away at school. The recreation complex is located right behind Alumni Hall. For information about the classes offered and the different facilities around campus head to www.western-mustangs.ca. . Keep yourself healthy and happy.

Join clubs, sports, charities, go to events – just do anything to keep yourself active. The worst thing you can possibly do for your waistline is sit around in rez, do nothing, get bored, eat, and get fat.

Explore the city and get involved!

WATCH YOUR PORTIONS

AVOID LATE-NIGHT SNACKING

GET INVOLVED

FIND THE TIME TO HIT THE GYM

AVOID HIGH-SUGAR DRINKING NIGHTSWe get it, first years drink – heck, university students drink; which is why so many students tend to gain weight while away at university. Some hard numbers to know:

1 OUNCE OF VODKA = 70 CALORIES1 OUNCE OF RUM = 70 CALORIES1 OUNCE OF RYE = 70 CALORIES1 OUNCE OF GIN = 70 CALORIES1 OUNCE OF TEQUILA = 70 CALORIES

Add that to which ever mix you’ve got in your mini-fridge and one drink could easily work out to be 200 – 300 calories. Multiply that by five or six, three nights a week, and you’re easily drinking yourself up a pant size. The easiest way to avoid gaining weight from drinking,

and no, we’re not going to say “don’t drink”; is to watch the calories in your mix. Opt for diet pop, low-cal juice, or even water to cut down your calories. Here are some other numbers to digest:

1 BOTTLE OF BEER (DRAFT) (12OZ) = 144 CALORIES1 BOTTLE OF BEER (LAGER) (12OZ)= 168 CALORIES1 BOTTLE OF LIGHT-BEER (DRAFT) (12OZ) = 108 CALORIES1 PINT OF BEER (DRAFT) (16OZ) = 192 CALORIES1 PINT OF BEER (LAGER) (16OZ) = 224 CALORIES1 PINT OF LIGHT-BEER (DRAFT) (16OZ) = 144 CALORIES1 GLASS OF WHITE WINE (5OZ) = 100 CALORIES1 GLASS OF RED WINE (5OZ) = 100 CALORIES1 COSMOPOLITAN (3OZ) = AROUND 160 CALORIES 1 VODKA MARTINI (3OZ) = AROUND 200 CALORIES1 MOJITO (7OZ) = AROUND200 CALORIES 1 STRAWBERRY DAIQUIRI (7OZ) = AROUND 400 CALORIES1 PINA COLADA (7OZ) = AROUND 600 CALORIES

LIFESTYLE

WORDS: Katherine Hope, PHOTO: Top News.com

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Going to university is a big step. It’s kind of like that first day of kindergarten, except no one has cut the crusts off your peanut butter sandwich. Also, the material is a little bit harder. To help you get through this confusing time, here is a list of the things I wish I did in first year.

1. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE HURON LIBRARY. First year students tend to try to study in their rooms or migrate in herds across the road to Weldon, where finding a spot to study often requires intense strategic planning. Not to mention, it looks like a large Cold War bomb shelter. Come on! We have a fantastic library right here, complete with comfy chairs.

2. USE PROFESSORS’ OFFICE HOURS. Professors drill this into their students’ heads every year, but one more time: office hours are cre-ated for students to use them. There are very few institutions in Canada where you get the chance to interact with your professors as much as at Huron. For questions, concerns or clarification, go to your professor!

3. BE ON THE HUNT FOR STUDENT DEALS.Hey, we’re all students here- which means we all have student budgets. So keep your student card on you at all times, because many companies offer a reduced student price (such as Greyhound). Some places even offer student meal deals, so keep your eyes peeled.

4. GO TO BED. EVERY NIGHT. This sounds like an obvious one, but once you get into the vicious cycle of exams, essays, and ex-tracurricular responsibilities, plus trying to have fun on top of it all, sleep is often the first thing to go. Of course, university sometimes demands an all-nighter, for academic or recreational purposes. But this should be the exception, not the rule.

5. MEMORIZE THE 2, 6, AND 13 BUS ROUTES. Let’s be honest, for most students these will be the only ones you’ll use.

HOW TO SURVIVE FIRST YEAR, HAVE SOME FUN,

AND RETAIN YOUR SANITY

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WORDS: Angela EasbyPHOTOS: Scgov.Net, Huron’s Alumni Photo Database

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LIFESTYLE

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6. BE NICE TO THE CAFETERIA WORKERS. This is common sense. It’s a good idea to be on the good side of the people preparing your food all year.

7. GET INVOLVED! BUT DON’T GIVE YOURSELF A HERNIA. One of the greatest things about going to university is chances are, you’re going to find some people with similar interests. And chances are, there is a club or group for those interests as well. Do some-thing, anything- intramural sports, student council, a charity, or a club- whatever you want. Make sure to check out the Huron and main campus clubs week. This is your time to discover what you like. Don’t overextend yourself though- this can cause feelings of panic, premature wrinkles, etc.

8. DO NOT PROCRASTINATE. AND DO NOT PROCRASTINATE ON NOT PROCRASTINATING.And do not procrastinate on not procrastinating. This could not be more important. I personally could have invented a teleportation device three times in the amount of time I wasted procrastinat-ing in first year. When it’s time to buckle down, turn off your phone, get off Facebook, and find a place where your party animal friends won’t find you. And, to borrow a line from Nike, just do it. You’ll be grateful when you have Sunday to sleep in and watch TV, and not have to finish four as-signments. Speaking of Sundays…

9. CHECK OUT RETRO NIGHT AT CALL THE OFFICE. The place to be on Sunday night, Retro Night is perfect for everyone who enjoys dancing like a fiend to the golden oldies. Entrance is $2 at the door, ID required, and then all the 70’s and 80’s tunes you can handle. Another bonus is the fact that this is not a Friday-night-at-Jack’s sort of crowd: Retro Night attracts more than a few unique characters. Call The Office is located at 216 York St. and is accessible by the 6 bus (York St. stop).

10. KEEP YOUR ROOM STOCKED WITH SOME SNACKS - ESPECIALLY ON WEEKENDS.It happens to the best of us- you’re in the middle of a particularly hilarious episode and you look up only to realize that you’ve missed dinner in the caf. Don’t get caught flat-footed; it will only make you grumpy (and cause rumbling tummies). An emergency box of cereal is definitely a good idea.

11. GET SOME FRESH AIR - DON’T FESTER IN YOUR ROOM. Go for a walk in Gibbons Park. Located directly behind TD Waterhouse stadium, this is a great park for running, tossing a ball around, or just soaking up the sun. Also, located behind Brescia are many forest trails perfect for a walk to clear your head. Some even lead back to behind Huron.

AND, MOST IMPORTANTLY…

12. REMEMBER THAT ALCOHOL DOES NOT GIVE YOU SUPERPOWERS. This just needs to be stated, since Western students forget it on a regular basis. Any feats of physi-cal prowess that are impossible sober should not be attempted in an altered state. Even if someone triple dares you.

TO MASTER THE ARTBy William Brown and Doug FrewOctober 18 to November 5 A charming look at the charismatic life of Julia Child and her love of cooking.

Rodgers & Hammerstein’sCINDERELLAMusic by Richard Rodgers Book and Lyrics by Oscar Hammerstein II November 23 to December 31 A childhood classic celebrating how love conquers all. The Prince is having a ball! Will you be there?

ED’S GARAGEWritten by Dan NeedlesJanuary 17 to February 4 Ed is a former farmer, part-time mechanic and full-time self-appointed community counselor, always ready to help others. Comical situations arise when Cassandra, an urban psychotherapist, sets up a pri-vate practice next door.

F. Scott Fitzgerald’sTHE GREAT GATSBYAdapted for the stage by Simon LevyFebruary 14 to March 3 The breathtaking glamour of the Jazz Age in the 1920s is the setting for this classic. Jay Gatsby, a self-made millionaire, passionately engages the beautiful & mysterious Daisy Buchanan while

Nick Carraway, a young newcomer to Long Island, is drawn into their world of obsession, greed and danger.

Theatre Newfoundland Labrador’s production of TEMPTING PROVIDENCEBy Robert ChafeMarch 13 to 31

A true story based on the inspiring portrait of New-foundland’s first out-port nurse. Myra Bennett, a true Canadian Hero assisted countless patients traveling by horse, boat, dogsled and foot over the 320-kilo-metre Northern Peninsula of Newfoundland for more than 50 years.

HAIRBook & Lyrics by Gerome Ragni and James Rado Music by Galt MacDermot April 10 to May 13

A youthful, barrier-breaking musical that rocked in the 1970’s, and also rocks today. This treasured American tribal love-rock production asks questions, seeks answers, embraces change and celebrates hope.

HOW TO GET THERE: The Grand Theater is lo-cated in the heart of London on Richmond Row. To get there simply find your way to Alumni Hall or the Natural Science Center and hop on the 6 Richmond bus heading south. Ride the bus until you reach the Richmond and Fullarton stop. You’re there! Enjoy the show.

If you enjoy live theatre you must experience the excitement and spirit of The Grand Theatre’s 2011/12 Main Stage Season. London’s professional theatre presents a full season of performances, running September through to May; showcasing a wide range of inspiring Canadian and international plays in the 839-seat Grand Theatre. For more information on any of these programs just head to The Grand Theatre’s website: www.grandtheatre.com.

the Grand Theatre 2011/12 Season WORDS: Katherine Hope PHOTO: Katrina Lat

8:00 am

Sitting on the bus, heading to the gym. Questioning my existence. This stinks.

MY DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THE GYM

What is happening? Why is Lady Gaga’s voice interrupting this lovely, peaceful dream I was having about floating around in a pool... in the middle of my apartment? Oh right, that’s my alarm. Why in Gaga’s name is it set for 6:30? Oh right, I was going to go to the gym. I could probably sleep another hour and still have time... Well maybe. Ugh, I guess I should just get it over with.

Braving the treadmills. Holy cow, how fast is that guy running? And that girl looks like she’s been here for hours... she’s half my size. Why do I put myself through this pub-lic humiliation?

6:30 am

6:30 am

8:00 am

7:50 am

7:10 am

WORDS: Rachel Bell PHOTOS: Angela Herring-Lauzon

7:10 am6:47 am

6:30 am

6:30 am 7:10 am6:47 am

The Next Day

6:30 am

Alright, I’ve been on this treadmill for 40 minutes. Well, 35 if you count the five min-ute warm-up... And really, 30 if you count that break in the middle. I know I said I’d run for an hour, but I’ll be walking around campus all day anyway. Plus, it’s my first time at the gym this semester. I should re-ally work myself up slowly, right?

Walking out of the gym. The sun is so bright! The birds sing so sweetly! Look at these poor saps heading into the gym, while I’ve already finished my entire work-out! I feel fantastic!

DEATH. Shut up Gaga! My legs... I can’t feel them! Aaaah! Never mind, now that I’m moving I can feel. Every. Muscle. What have I done to myself? You know, I should probably take a day off from the gym. I’ll go back tomorrow... Or something.

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HELLO, SLUTTY NURSEWORDS: Angela Herring-Lauzon

I am never going out for Halloween again. Add alcohol to an occasion that has increasingly be-come about ‘slutting up’ and hooking up, and you get an experience that is only bearable if obscenely intoxicated. Anyone who has ever been downtown London on the 31st can attest to the innumerable sightings of barely-con-cealed flesh, made more revealing by copious amounts of alcohol. I am not against fun, don’t get me wrong. However, for the sake of one’s own self-preservation, I cannot quite com-prehend the mindset that would lead people to cover themselves in nothing but a sparkly bikini and step out into the cold late-autumn air. As I stood in an incredibly long line at the Barking Frog downtown last Halloween, I re-alized the last thing I wanted from that night was a free peep-show. I wonder what happened to a night that once revolved solely around eat-ing as much sugar as humanly possible. People grow up, I suppose. But I don’t think growing up should entail replacing candy with sex.

I think perhaps the most vivid memory I have of last Halloween was the moment I set eyes on Eve. No, I did not meet the girl of my dreams or anything. I did, however, witness the epitome of temptation. This skinny girl came staggering through the side door of the Frog and pushed her way onto the dance floor, clad only in what appeared to be a bra and panties covered in leaves. I think that was the moment I realized I needed to get home, or at least that I didn’t quite belong next to that temptress. Tugging self-consciously at my leopard-print dress and adjusting my ears, there on the sticky dance floor I truly contemplated the ‘new’ meaning of Halloween for the first time.

And I didn’t like it. I mean, dressing up and getting pretty for the guys is one thing; baring

tiveness. I mean, I am constantly astounded by how many things can be made ‘slutty.’ Slutty pumpkin, slutty nurse, slutty librarian; the list goes on and on. How does one make something like Optimus Prime or Gandalf ‘slutty’? What is the obsession with the skanky (insert occu-pation/object/person here)? I think my goal for this year should be figuring out how to make myself into a slutty refrigerator. Just an idea.

I actually find the lack of clothing surround-ing Halloween celebrations rather amusing. I never once saw a modest costume, my immedi-ate circle of friends excluded. In amongst the crowds of hundreds of people, we remained the only ones not sporting garters and fishnets, push-up bras and sequins. Even funnier to me is imagining the look on mothers’ faces if they could see their little angels dressed as every-thing but the manifestation of purity. ‘Trick or treat’ certainly takes on a new meaning when university students take control of Halloween.

These observations, and this rant I suppose, serve to question the entire concept of Hallow-een - it seems to me the holiday that started as an excuse to dress in ridiculous clothing and eat crazy amounts of candy has turned into something entirely different. Of course people grow up. But sometimes it’s nice to preserve some childhood innocence, right? As it is, I fully plan on hosting a house party this year. I will be able to get sufficiently inebriated with a comfortable group of people, and not have to fend off the hordes of mostly-naked, sweaty men and women. None of us, I trust, will have to worry about a leaf-covered bra slipping off when it shouldn’t.

it all at the risk of getting frostbite is a whole other issue indeed. Whatever happened to the innocent tradition of asking strangers for can-dy? Now, Halloween seems to be about asking strangers for a whole lot more than that.

Part of the tradition surrounding the slutty Hal-loween costume includes the violence with which members of both sexes pursue each other. Heaven forbid you get in the way of a ‘slutty nurse’ hell bent on seducing the hunky doctor of her dreams. It gets downright dan-gerous having a large number of people in one area, all desperate to throw their bodies at the first guy who notices them. Hooking up is a serious business, I guess.

If the girls try their hardest to come across as sluts, then the boys step quite eagerly into their roles as hunky seducers. Muscular displays and incredibly cheesy pick-up lines are all part of the Halloween act. Adam and Eve take a mutual bite of the forbidden fruit that is alco-hol, and fall deeply into some twisted satanic temptation. The best instance of this dance of the sexes occurred when a fireman offered to show me some fun at his place. Granted, he was quite tanned and muscular, and I was more than a little surprised that he deigned to bother with the girl not showing much of anything. Had I been more intoxicated, I may have even thought it was a good idea to let him show me that fun. As it was, mere seconds after I ex-tracted myself he was surrounded by a fresh horde of scantily-clad ladies. Most, I’m sure, were more than willing than I to fawn over his muscles.

The range of costumes one witnesses when out on the town for Halloween is quite astonishing. I guess I should applaud people on their inven-

OPINIONS

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ON EARTH, EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU CRITIQUE

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The entire Alien film series is a lot like a chest-burster. It is unique, edgy, and genuinely scary, but after the show is over it’s a bloody mess to clean up. Having watched the first two films Rid-ley Scott’s Alien and James Cameron’s Aliens, it became my duty to subject myself to the lat-ter Alien Cubed (Yes, I know that’s not its real name but I’m going to insist on calling it that be-cause the digit 3 is spelled that way!) and Alien Resurrection. The Alien film series being essen-tially representative of everything one should do with a science fiction film, as well as everything one should not do.

ALIEN

The first film was a work of science fiction bril-liance. The film follows Ripley (Sigourney Weav-er) and a cast of six other characters as workers on a space ship for ‘the Company’. The crew is awoken from cyrosleep early by their android Ash (Ian Holm) to discover a mysterious signal com-ing from a mysterious planet. When one crewman (John Hurt) has an unfortunate mouth to mouth with an alien face-hugger, he is brought on board and, after a hearty meal, seems to recover. The crew member then spoils everyone else’s appe-tites when an alien life form explodes from his stomach. All male pregnancy allusions aside, this scene has become an iconic moment of horror film. In fact, this particular scene was shot with the actors not aware of what was going to happen, so their reactions are completely improvised. This movie was absolutely brilliant, save for one really dumb scene in which the alien could have been easily dispatched were it not for one character becoming so scared she literally couldn’t move. This film is a magnificent specimen that produced many audible screams among humans on Earth.

ALIENS

Ten years later, James Cameron took up the role of making the sequel. The subsequent film was incredibly well thought out and was a logical progression of the concept. The Cameron tagline ‘this time, it’s war’ summarizes the difference be-tween Alien and Aliens perfectly. The first film was a (almost minimalist by today’s standards) horror film, while the second is a war movie. What worked about this film was that the themes and motifs were not abandoned. The consistent and occasionally very intense motif of motion sensors that do not combat a vertical threat was incredibly well used in both the original and Cam-eron’s Aliens. The obvious feminist themes were expanded with Hicks and Newt functioning as Ri-pley’s family. The Company remained some kind of unexplored villainous entity with largely un-known goals. The mistrust of A.I. was well used here with the character of Bishop functioning as

a good foil to his predecessor, Ash. Further, this film featured an amazing end fight sequence that makes Avatar seem like retread by comparison.

ALIEN CUBED

Then there is Alien Cubed. At the time of writ-ing it has to be possibly one of the worst things I have seen in a while. If this film is anything it is a testimony to why studios should not be making calls over the director of the film; according to interviews with Fincher and the cast many scenes were altered without Fincher’s permission. (Not that it would have helped the film much.) This was David Fincher’s first film and thankfully his work has gotten better since this piece of agony. After killing off Hicks, Bishop, and Newt within the first few minutes, Alien Cubed decides that the best way to move the story forward from a bunch of marines having a war with acid-bleeding aliens is the transition to a prison planet with no weapons and a bunch of religious guys. There is one partially redeeming scene to this movie and that is the rather obnoxious montage between the birth of the alien and the funeral for Hicks and Newt. Perhaps, this alien bursting from some kind of bull could be a reflection of how this movie is bullshit, but that’s probably a stretch.

This film could compete with Tommy Wi-seau’s The Room for the sheer number of plot holes. Here is a list of some unanswered ques-tions: How did the egg get on the ship? What killed Newt and Hicks? Where did the other face-hugger that killed the dog/ox come from? Why did Ripley decide to fornicate with the monotone doctor? If you are on a planet full of rapists and murderers who haven’t seen a woman in years, why do go out of your way to walk among them when you are specifically advised not to? Why do you put on goggles before you attempt to rape someone? Why do you start shooting a movie when you have no script? Why did I put on pants this morning? Why the hell did I volunteer to watch this film? What point is there to my exis-tence and what reason do I have to go on after watching this bullshit? At least Alien Resurrec-tion can’t be any worse than this film.

ALIEN RESURRECTION

Why, God? Why? Alien Resurrection is so bad it makes Alien Cubed look like Citizen Kane. Tak-ing place 200 years after Fincher’s disaster of a film, Alien Resurrection involves a clone of Rip-ley fighting the aliens on a spacecraft headed for Earth. There is absolutely nothing that could be said about this movie on a plot, cinematic, or the-matic level. The character of Ripley, having been both physically and creatively destroyed in Alien Cubed, is essentially corpse humped here.

While Alien Cubed essentially abandoned all the motifs of the series, this film tries a bit of necro-mancy by bringing in hollowed-out elements of them. Forcing aliens into space was a theme of the first two films; one didn’t have to butcher it by trying to make it as gory as possible.

THE FUTURE OF ALIENS

Now Ridley Scott is coming back to clone the D.N.A. from this dead series’ corpse. Scott and Cameron being the only two directors to actually do this series well, there is plenty of potential for the film to be good. However, I am not going to have any expectations. Why can’t a movie series just end? Do we always have to have a sequel, prequel or reboot to qualify any movie that be-came successful? There is no one person that the finger can be pointed at for killing this series. It was the Studio that killed Alien; it is hilarious only for the reason that company apathy towards anything outside of profits was one of the themes of the series. In any case, I am going to continue to deny the existence of Alien Cubed and Alien: Resurrection and I will violent destroy anyone who mentions Alien vs Predator.

OVERALL ANALYSIS

Trying to analyze the Alien franchise as a whole is truly futile. The first two movies could be de-constructed rather nicely but the last two con-tribute absolutely nothing to any sort of thesis. A good sequel will expand and explore the themes of its predecessor but a bad film forgets anything that made the original great. The pro-feminist themes, vertical threat of the aliens, mistrust of A.I., character development, and special effects artistry were jettisoned into space with the release of Alien Cubed and Alien Resurrection. In short, these films are paradigms of why directorial vi-sion will always be more important than anything film studios contribute to film. 20th Century Fox is to the Alien franchise what the Company is to the xenomorphs; an organization trying to control something that cannot and should not be controlled. Ridley Scott may still be able to make something interesting in a prequel but for me the alien has burst forward and now there are bloody bits of John Hurt all over my dinner.

THE AFTERTHOUGHT:

Although the last two movies in this series sucked, at least I wasn’t assigned some kind of analysis of the Star Wars prequel trilogy.

WORDS: Brent Holmes

ON EARTH, EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU CRITIQUE

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NarciIS TECHNOLOGY

YESWORDS: Nicole Goodbrand

The cold, sad truth of the matter is that narcissism is growing, especially among Generation X and Y. Young people today feel the constant need of admiration. They feed on feeling spe-cial and are extremely sensitive to any sort of criticism. Today’s technology is feeding into that narcissistic behaviour in multiple ways.

Narcissists, more or less, are people who think of themselves far too much. They are, as they believe, a “big deal”. Social media sites, like Facebook, have understandably become the breeding ground for highly narcissistic behav-iour. The Facebook user can post glam-orous photo of themselves, update their friends on their current status, and even like the things they do. The entire site is based on the fact people like to tell oth-ers what they are doing; it is blatantly and unabashedly “all about me.” There are innumerable blog sites floating out in the depths of cyberspace that exist for the sole purpose of informing the world on every mundane detail of one’s life, including what they like to eat, what they think about at 3 a.m, and what TV shows they waste their time watching. Technology is promoting that being self-centred is appropriate to the point that it is now socially acceptable.

However, social networking sites aren’t

the only way face that technology has allowed narcissism to spread rampant-ly. How people use electronics has cre-ated a “me” focused system of going through life. Have you ever tried to start a conversation with someone who has their earphones in? Or with some-one who has their cell in a vice grip as they text madly and incessantly? You probably thought about it and then de-cided against it. Human interaction gets KO’d in the first round as soon as the Blackberry rears its head. Society’s use of cell phones and other handheld de-vices have made it that much easier to forgo socialization and focus on one-self. Never before has it been so easy to ignore someone who you might not find particularly interesting. Furthermore, this “me” attitude and preoccupation with ourselves can be seen in the com-plete lack of common courtesy; we no longer have any awareness of the world around us. Narcissistic people don’t care that their music is blaring obnox-iously out of their headphones or that their argument over their cell phone is disrupting the entire bus.

Narcissism may have always existed in human nature, but technology and the way we use it has allowed it to become uncommonly common. Technology has created a space for narcissism and we have filled it.

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ssisticNarciNOWORDS: Connor Hill

There’s something disheartening about the way the Internet and related com-munication technologies have devel-oped in the world. The possibilities are vast and endless. Listening to vintage news reports about the Internet from the early nineties makes it seem like the Internet was poised to be some sort of virtual education utopia, but it fell short of that goal between then and now. Still, a lot of predictions from that time came true. We can read newspapers and books, share ideas with colleagues, and spread theories and ideas online. However, people mostly seem to use it not for learning, but to post silly pho-tographs of themselves and talk about their personal lives. Social networking sites, most notoriously Facebook, seem to facilitate and breed narcissism.

But I would argue otherwise. As I stated before, the major predictions on the fu-ture capabilities of the Internet eventu-ally came true, and few would argue that it is not a valuable resource for learning today. Information is available on nearly every subject known to man, lectures from top universities are avail-able free to download, and scholarly journals are able to reach more readers

than ever before. The Internet enables those who want to learn to learn more and learn more efficiently. It also allows those who want to be seen and noticed to be seen more and seen more efficiently. For every TED there’s a Facebook. For every iTunesU there’s a Formspring.

As journalist and activist Esther Dyson once said: “The Internet is like alcohol in some sense. It accentuates what you would do anyway. If you want to be a loner, you can be more alone. If you want to connect, it makes it easier to connect.” (Time Magazine, Oct. 2005). This can be extended from isolation/ connectivity to learning/ attention seek-ing. The Internet enables both, and to say it perpetuates narcissism is like say-ing guns or atomic bombs perpetuate vi-olence. They give us an outlet, a tool for performing violent actions. Narcissism is another human trait that, though eas-ier to indulge nowadays, is not found in greater quantities than it has been in the past. There’s a reason humans across all cultures invented the spear, and there’s a reason humans flock to social network-ing sites. And it has very little to do with the rise of technology itself.

MAKING US MORE

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