12
(303)663-5578 500 2nd St, Castle Rock, CO 80104 (303)663-5578 Domestic Heavytow Diesel Imports 4x4 Race www.handmtransmission.com Come see us at our new location We’ve Moved! Free! For advertising call: 303-994-9683 The Neatest Little Paper Ever Read!® www.ILoveTidbits.com Of Douglas County Colorado Of Douglas County Colorado Issue 748 - December 19, 2011 www.ILoveTidbits.com See page 7 OPEN REGISTRATION ONLINE www.DC-Dolphins.org Enter ÒTidbitsÓ in the Special Requests Box on the registration form and receive an additional $10 OFF !"##$%&'## )*+,-.*/ 012 3/45*- 678.9 &':$&'## $4/;< &,/5 )*+,-./4.,1= '+*- >7?@ Front Page Classifieds Queen Pillowtop Mattress Set. Brand New with warranty. $169. Can Deliver 303--758-1312 $285 New King Pillowtop Mattress/ Foundation Set with warranty. Delivery Avail. Call 303-758-1312 Pottery Barn Style 100% Leather Sofa & Loveseat Brand New 100% Leather. Very Nice, value over $5,500 must sell only $1,500. Solid hardwood construction fram with lifetime warranty. Can separate, also has chair and ottoman available. Can Deliver. Call 303- 758-1323 New 12” Latex Memory Foam Mattress Eco-Friendly zip off Bamboo “Coolmax” Cover. Brand New in the original manufacturer’s box. Includes 20 year Man- facturers warranty. Matress lists $1999. Will sacrifice for $699. Pub Dining Set --NEW $349 Brand New All Wood Dining Set Beautiful Espresso Color Table & 4 Chairs. Never Used, still in factory boxes. Only $349 Delivery Avl Call: 303-758-1323 6 Pc, Bedroom Set: Brand new still in boxes. List $1800. Sell $599 Can Deliver 303-758-1312. Microfiber Sofa & Loveseat Brand New Stain Resistant Lifetime warranty list $1500. Sell $599 Del Avail Call 303-758-1323 Established 1976 11028 S Pikes Peak Dr, Parker • 303-841-2666 www.PinetreeJewelers.com WANT TO RUN YOUR OWN BUSINESS? We provide the opportunity for success! Call 1.800.523.3096 (U.S.) 1.866.631.1567 (CAN) ww w.tidbitsweekly. com Publish a Paper in Your Area Merry Christmas from our family to yours Thank you for making us Colorado’s #1 Trailer dealer... Parker Trailers Inc 8900 S Brompton Way Parker, CO 80134 303-841-4910 WWW.PARKERTRAILERS.COM Commercial & Residential Snow Removal IN STOCK Curtis Snowplows!! Don’t forget to Winterize !!! Make an Appointment today! New & Used Sales Rentals and Storage space available M-F 8-00-5:30 S 9:00-3:00 720-560-6763 Bonded and Insured WE BUY JUNK CARS, TRUCKS & SUV’s We come to you with cash! NEED EXTRA CHRISTMAS MONEY? Fall Special 5 Areas Up To 600 Sq Ft 99 $ One coupon per customer Expires 12/31/11 99 $ $ 158 Upholstry Special Sofa, Loveseat & Chair One coupon per customer Exp 12/31/11 Tile & Grout Cleaning Up to 150 sq ft One coupon per customer Expires 12/31/11 303-534-3232 Ask about our expert carpet stretching & seam repairs! New Member Pricing! $30.00 1/8th 850 Commercial Lane Palmer Lake, CO 80133 Just off 105 on Circle Rd Mon-Fri 10-7pm Sat 10-5 Sun 12-5 Palmer Lake Wellness Safeway I-25 Hwy 105 Monument Woodmoor Mc Donalds Exit 161 Circle Rd First Time Customers will receive member pricing for their 1st visit! 719-488-9900 Daily oz. Specials $150 members Your Home SOLD Guaranteed in 45 Days Or I’ll Buy It Doug James Re/Max Masters 303-814-3684 45daysSold.com TIDBITS® SINGS 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS by Kathy Wolfe Most of us are familiar with the popular Christmas tune “The Twelve Days of Christmas.” This week, Tidbits has a few more details about each of the gifts received by the singer from his or her “true love,” everything from drummers drumming to maids a-milking to swans, geese, turtledoves and the partridge in the pear tree! The drum is considered the oldest musical instrument and is also used for non-musical purposes, such as long- distance communication. An Englishman set a world re- cord by playing 400 separate drums in 16.3 seconds in 1995. Ireland’s Millennium Drum, constructed of birch plywood and sailcloth, is considered the world’s largest drum with a diameter of 15 feet, 6 inches. It was built for Ireland’s millennium festivities. A set of panpipes consists of from three to 40 tubes, usually cane, but also wood or pottery. The length of the pipes determines the pitch of the note. • Greek mythology tells of Pan, the god of woods and pastures and the protector of shepherds and their flocks. According to legend, Pan, half-man and half-goat, is the inventor of the panpipe, fashioned from reeds, on which he piped lovely music. turn the page for more!

Issue 748

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Page 1: Issue 748

(303)663-5578

500 2nd St, Castle Rock, CO 80104

(303)663-5578DomesticHeavytowDiesel

Imports4x4Race

www.handmtransmission.comCome see us at our new location

We’ve

Moved!

Free!For advertising call:

303-994-9683The Neatest Little Paper Ever Read!® www.ILoveTidbits.com

Of Douglas County ColoradoOf Douglas County ColoradoIssue 748 - December 19, 2011 www.ILoveTidbits.com

See page 7

!

! OPEN REGISTRATION ONLINE

www.DC-Dolphins.org

Enter ÒTidbitsÓ in the Special Requests Box on the registration form and receive an additional

$10 OFF !

!

!"##$%&'##()*+,-.*/(012(3/45*-(678.9(!

!

&':$&'##($4/;<(&,/5()*+,-./4.,1=(

'+*-(>7?@(

Front Page ClassifiedsQueen Pillowtop

Mattress Set. Brand New with warranty. $169. Can Deliver 303--758-1312

$285 New King Pillowtop Mattress/

Foundation Setwith warranty. Delivery Avail. Call 303-758-1312

Pottery Barn Style 100% Leather Sofa & LoveseatBrand New 100% Leather.

Very Nice, value over $5,500 must sell only

$1,500. Solid hardwood construction fram with lifetime warranty. Can

separate, also has chair and ottoman available. Can Deliver. Call 303-

758-1323

New 12” Latex Memory Foam Mattress

Eco-Friendly zip off Bamboo “Coolmax” Cover. Brand New in the original manufacturer’s box. Includes 20 year Man- facturers warranty. Matress lists $1999. Will sacrifice for $699. Pub Dining Set --NEW $349 Brand New All Wood Dining Set Beautiful Espresso Color Table & 4 Chairs. Never Used, still in factory boxes. Only $349 Delivery Avl Call: 303-758-1323

6 Pc, Bedroom Set:Brand new still in boxes.

List $1800. Sell $599 Can Deliver

303-758-1312.

Microfiber Sofa & Loveseat Brand New Stain ResistantLifetime warranty list $1500. Sell $599 Del AvailCall 303-758-1323

Established 1976

11028 S Pikes Peak Dr, Parker • 303-841-2666 www.PinetreeJewelers.com

Publish a Paper in Your AreaWANT TO RUN YOUR OWN BUSINESS?

We provide the opportunity for success!Call 1.800.523.3096 (U.S.)

1.866.631.1567 (CAN)www.tidbitsweekly. com

Publisha PaperinYourArea

Merry Christmas from our family to yoursThank you for making us

Colorado’s #1 Trailer dealer...

Parker Trailers Inc8900 S Brompton Way

Parker, CO 80134303-841-4910

WWW.PARKERTRAILERS.COM

Commercial & Residential Snow RemovalIN STOCK Curtis Snowplows!!

Don’t forget to Winterize !!!Make an Appointment today!

New & Used SalesRentals and Storage space available

M-F 8-00-5:30 S 9:00-3:00

720-560-6763Bonded and Insured

WE BUY JUNK CARS, TRUCKS & SUV’s

We come to youwith cash!

NEED EXTRA CHRISTMASMONEY?

Fall Special

5 AreasUp To 600 Sq Ft 99$

One coupon per customerExpires 12/31/11 99$

$158Upholstry

SpecialSofa, Loveseat& Chair One coupon per

customer Exp 12/31/11

Tile & GroutCleaning Up to

150 sq ft

One coupon per customer Expires 12/31/11

303-534-3232Ask about ourexpert carpetstretching &

seam repairs!

New Member Pricing!$30.00 1/8th

850 Commercial LanePalmer Lake, CO 80133Just off 105 on Circle Rd

Mon-Fri 10-7pmSat 10-5Sun 12-5

Palmer Lake Wellness Safeway

I-25

Hwy 105

Monument

Woodmoor

McDonalds

Exit 161

Circ

le R

d

First Time Customers will receivemember pricing for their 1st visit!

719-488-9900Daily oz. Specials $150 members

Your Home SOLDGuaranteed in 45 DaysOr I’ll Buy It

Doug JamesRe/Max Masters303-814-368445daysSold.com

TIDBITS® SINGS

12 DAYS OF CHRISTMASby Kathy Wolfe

Most of us are familiar with the popular Christmas tune “The Twelve Days of Christmas.” This week, Tidbits has a few more details about each of the gifts received by the singer from his or her “true love,” everything from drummers drumming to maids a-milking to swans, geese, turtledoves and the partridge in the pear tree!• The drum is considered the oldest musical instrument and is also used for non-musical purposes, such as long-distance communication. An Englishman set a world re-cord by playing 400 separate drums in 16.3 seconds in 1995. Ireland’s Millennium Drum, constructed of birch plywood and sailcloth, is considered the world’s largest drum with a diameter of 15 feet, 6 inches. It was built for Ireland’s millennium festivities.• A set of panpipes consists of from three to 40 tubes, usually cane, but also wood or pottery. The length of the pipes determines the pitch of the note. • Greek mythology tells of Pan, the god of woods and pastures and the protector of shepherds and their flocks. According to legend, Pan, half-man and half-goat, is the inventor of the panpipe, fashioned from reeds, on which he piped lovely music.

turn the page for more!

Page 2: Issue 748

2 Tidbits®ofDouglasCounty InterestingStuffForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

Tidbits of Douglas County Colorado

Ads R Us, LLCTim Mundy, Publisher

303-994-9683 [email protected], CO 80134

Continued on page 5

DOUGLAS COUNTY DIESEL

DIESEL EMISSIONS PERFORMANCE REPAIR

ALL MAINTENANCESERVICES

DOT INSPECTIONSTRUCKS & TRAILERS

DIESEL EMISSIONS PERFORMANCE REPAIR

ALL MAINTENANCESERVICES

DOT INSPECTIONSTRUCKS & TRAILERS

Trust the Experienced &Honest mechanics at...

1221 Caprice DriveCastle Rock, CO 80109

303-660-9986www.DouglasCountyDiesel.com

ASE CERTIFIED MASTER TECHNICIAN WITH 23 YEARS EXPERIENCE

Quality Service on all Foreign and Domestic Vehicles

303-841-800010270 S. Dransfeldt Rd. #400

Parker, CO 80134FAX: 303-841-8050

gregsautorepair.comFamily Owned and Operated Small Business

“Your Hometown Service Center”

ASE CERTIFIED MASTER TECHNICIAN WITH OVER 23 YEARS EXPERIENCE

Quality Service on all Foreignand Domestic Vehicles

303-841-800010270 S Dransfeldt Rd #400

Parker, CO 80134gregsautorepair.com

All Seasons Discount TransmissionRepairs done right the �rst time!

FREE towing w/ major repairs.Senior & Military discounts.

303-840-1000720-353-0274

or30 Years experience

Owner/OperatorRon Howard

10270 S Dransfeldt RdParker, CO 80134South of Lowes, behind Greg’s Auto

We’re here ALL Season long!

$150 OFFMAJOR TRANSMISSION REPAIR

$50 OFFCLUTCH REPAIR

$29.95 FLUID CHANGE SPECIAL FILTER AND SPECIALTY FLUIDS EXTRA NO EXPIRATION

Concrete MikeO�ce: 303.840.7347Cell: 303.902.1503

25+ Years Experience

PatiosSidewalksDriveways

BasementsGarage Floors

Stairs

25+ Years Experience12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS (continued):• The title “Lord” can be used if a gentleman is a baron, viscount, earl, marquis, bishop, a dignitary of the Church of England or a member of Great Britain’s House of Lords. An aga is a Turkish Lord. • The cuckoopint is a European plant with bright red poisonous berries and is often referred to as the “Lords-and-Ladies.” Ingesting the berries can re-sult in swelling of the throat, difficulty breathing, burning pain and an upset stomach. • The 1993 Arizona half-marathon had an inter-esting entrant, Elizabeth Ursic, who chose to tap-dance the 13.1-mile distance.• In 1931, a couple set out to win Chicago’s Mer-ry Garden Ballroom dance marathon. They danced over 214 days, with rest periods beginning at 20 minutes per hour, decreasing to zero minutes per hour. They were not allowed to close their eyes for more than 15 seconds. Their record-setting endur-ance was rewarded with a $2,000 prize. • A California cow named simply “Number 289” is the leader in lifetime milk production, with more than 54,070 gallons of milk to her credit. That’s enough to fill more than eight 60-foot tanker trucks. She averaged about 7 gallons a day, compared to about 4.4 gallons for a normal cow. Number 289 lived to be 19 years old, about four times longer than the average Holstein. • Thanks to L.O. Colvin, we have the milking ma-chine. Back in 1860, he introduced the first suc-tion-type contraption. A sign seen in recent years on the back of a milk truck read: “Modern Milking Machine Company … All That We Are We Owe to Udders.”

• “Swan” is the 1,471st most popular last name in the United States, which computes to about 20,000 people.

• Swans live on every continent except Africa and Antarctica. The sounds they make vary from whistles to hisses to trumpet-like noises. Beware of the female swan; she will attack anything that presents a danger to her eggs, including dogs, fox-es and people.

• The stars Deneb and Albirco mark the head and tail of the swan in the constellation Cygnus. Ac-cording to mythology, Cygnus was a friend of the son of Apollo, the sun god. When the son fell into the river, Cygnus dove into the water time after time in an attempt to rescue his friend, but to no avail. They myth says Cygnus was turned into a swan by Zeus in order to allow him to dive deeper. The English language uses the word “cygnet” for a baby swan.

• Although the lifespan of the domestic goose av-

Page 3: Issue 748

Dr. James Olson - The Meow Doc

Cat Q & ACat Q & A

PetPage Tidbits®ofDouglasCounty3ForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

Cat SpecialistDr. James Olson, Dipl ABVP (Feline)

Dr. Jennifer Olson612 Atchison Way • Castle Rock CO 80109

303.663.2287 (CATS)

Is Your Cat Bored?

Please call 303.663.2287 (CATS) for more information or visit www.catspecialist.com

We don’t think of our cats as “captive” animals, but in truth they are. Indoor-only cats are captive in our homes and can become bored, leading to “sickness behaviors.” How do you know your cat is bored? Inappropriate litterbox behaviors, aggression, decreased food or water intake, vomiting/diarrhea, lethargy and changes in general grooming CAN be signs of sickness behaviors due to the stress of captivity.

If your cat is experiencing any of these behaviors, Cat Specialist can help you determine whether they are due to a medical condition. If your cat is medically sound, we are always available to talk feline enrichment with you. From cat trees to toys, there are many different smells and sounds that can break up the kitty doldrums!

HayCo L.L.C.Excellent Quality Hay

and Straw. Check for Availability ~~~~~~~~~~~

Sm. Squares • Lg. Squares Rounds • Alfalfa • Grass

Mixed • Straw 719-339-3525 • We Deliver

Excellent Quality Hayand Straw.

Please Check for AvailabilityCall For ALL Your Livestock

Reclamation Needs.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sm. Squares • Lg. SquaresRounds • Alfalfa • grass

Mixed • Straw

719-339-3525 • We Deliver

The Buddy Center Needs Your Help

Pet of the WeekName:KONO#A06010399 year old neuteredmale, black Labrador Retriever mix dog looking for a good home.

4556 Castleton Court, Castle Rock, CO 80109(303)751-5772 * www.DDFL.ORG

Dr. James K. Olson is "The Meow Doc", a nationally recognized veterinarian specializing exclusively in cats. Dr. Olson holds the title of Diplomate, Feline Specialty, from the American Board of Veterinary Practitioners. He is certified to practice nuclear medi-cine by the State of Colorado Department of Radiaton Safety. His practice is located in Castle Rock, Colorado. For more information please visit his comprehensive website: www.CatSpecialist.com

Seasonal Wellness Hints – Winter!(Holidays: Christmas, Hanukkah, New

Years and Valentine’s Day)

Seasonal Hazards:Indoors

• Holiday trees & plants, tree water, lights & electrical cords, tinsel, string, ribbon, rubber bands, decorations, potpourri dry & liquid, etc. can harm your cat.

• Household cleaners and bleach are very toxic to cats (poisoning and/or chemical burns).

• Holiday stress can affect cats so protect your cats from parties and too many people.

• Open ducts, woodstoves, fireplaces, and indoor air pollution can be deadly. (Carbon monoxide)

• Family prescription medications, dental floss, string, and cleaning supplies can be deadly to cats.

• Holiday foods, candy, alcoholic beverages, & treats can be dangerous.

• Computer cords/mice, electronics, loud sounds & bright lights are dangers.

• Hot stoves, grills and appliances (cats sleeping in clothes driers & washers) can burn or kill cats.

• Survey your house for any other potential dangers and “cat-proof” your house!

Outdoors• Winter damp, cold, snow, frostbite, high winds & no shelter

can be deadly to your cats.• Garages have antifreeze, motor oil & grease, warm cars/

engines & poisonous chemicals.• Cats being hit by a car or truck are common.• Cat fights with diseased cats can make your cat sick – FeLV

& FIV.• Being hurt or killed by coyotes, foxes, owls, hawks, &

mountain lions are common in Colorado.• Hunting and ingesting a ‘bad meal’ are common.• Diseases like Rabies, Bubonic Plague, West Nile Fever, etc.

are possible with outdoor exposure.

Ways to Stay Well: (“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!”)

• Your cat needs to eat a balanced, healthy diet and have access to fresh, clean water.

• Provide some bathroom privacy! Put the litter box in a quiet, easy to access place and clean it twice daily. In multiple cat households, provide one more litter box than cats.

• Play with your cat and have cat friendly toys – play reduces cat stress so play with your cat!

• Groom your cat often: daily if possible. Watch for skin problems, dandruff, bumps, sores and painful hair mats. These may require professional removal.

• Create cat friendly safe havens in your house – add cat towers, kitty cups and window perches.

• Keep your cat healthy with annual adult health exams and senior cats (>7 years of age) need health exams every 6 months (1 human year is 4 years to your cat).

• Keep all cats inside for safety or build a safe outdoor atrium (a fenced run in the backyard). The most dangerous time for a cat to be outside is from dusk until dawn.

• Do quarterly health reviews on your cat – ask ‘early warning’ health questions.

CAN’T GET ENOUGH...

...and receive Tidbits each week on your email.

Just go toILoveTidbits.com

10431 Park Glenn Way - ParkerS. Parker Road & Plaza Drive

303.840.2800

Cindy Rose, AAMS®Financial Advisor

www.edwardjones.com Member SIPC

2195 N Highway 83 #23Franktown, CO 80116303-688-2127

When you stop and look back at what’s happenedin the markets, it’s easy to realize how quicklythings can change. That’s why we should schedulesome time to discuss how the market can impactyour �nancial goals. We can also conduct a freeportfolio review to help you decide if you should make changes to your investments and whetheryou’re on track to reach your goals.

Markets Change.Are you Prepared?

Stop by or call today to schedule your free review.

Page 4: Issue 748

Chunky’s

4TwentyQuestionsTidbits®ofDouglasCountyForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

Sudoku Made Possible By

Bob LowryNeighborhoodExclusive Agent

303.688.1966Auto-Home-Business-Life

Allstate Insurance Company201 S Wilcox St. #2A

Castle Rock

30

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20 QUESTIONS

SPORTS QUIZBy Chris Richcreek

1. In 2009, Philadelphia’s Chase Utley became the second player to hit five home runs in a World Series. Who was the

first?2. Who was the oldest player to steal a base in the major

leagues?3. Name the first college football Division I player to have 1,500 yards rushing and 1,500 yards passing in the same

season.4. In the 2009-10 season, Sacramento guard Tyreke Evans

became the fourth rookie in NBA history to average at least 20 points, five rebounds and five assists per game. Name two

of the first three to do it. 5. Entering the 2011-12 season, how many times had Jaromir

Jagr tallied 40-plus goals in an NHL season?6. Northwestern has won the women’s lacrosse national

championship six times in the past seven seasons (2005-11). Name the only other school to win a title during that time.

7. Who was the first mixed martial-arts fighter to win major titles in two weight classes?

Answers1. Reggie Jackson of the New York Yankees, in 1977.

2. Arlie Latham was 49 years old when he stole a base for the 1909 New York Giants.

3. Michigan quarterback Denard Robinson, in 2010.4. Oscar Robertson, Michael Jordan and LeBron James.

5. Six times.6. Maryland beat Northwestern in 2010.

7. Randy Couture.

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1. What is the term that refers to the pain you get along the back of the leg or thigh or both, in the zone of the sensory pathway of the sciatic nerve?

2. What country occupies the northern third of the island of Great Britain?

3. Name the mechanical device consisting in its simplest form of a continuous helical rib or thread, which may be viewed as an indefinite inclined plane wrapped around a cylinder.

4. What do they call the official copyist of manuscripts and documents?

5. In football what do you call the line from which the ball is snapped into play?

6. What is the name of the mean-spirited, miserly person portrayed in Charles Dicken’s A Christmas Carol?

7. What is the art of carving, molding, or assembling wood, stone, or other materials into representations or ornaments such as monuments, statues, busts, etc.?

8. What warm-blooded, carnivorous animal is especially adapted for life in the sea but, unlike the whale and dolphin, is unable to live entirely independent of land?

9. She sells seashells down by the what?10. What US city has the “Space Needle” as a significant

landmark?11. What is another term for High School?12. What do you call someone who secedes or who

believes in secession?13. If you have a secondary or subordinate roll you are

often said to play what fiddle?14. What is the highest-ranking executive officer of the

United Nations?15. Name the Jewish fest that commemorates the exodus

from Egypt, usually celebrated on the first evening of t Passover.

16. What do you call the science of earthquakes?17. What is the big word used to refer to practice of making

oneself greater, as in importance?18. What American Indian Tribe of Florida is used as the

mascot of Florida State University?19. What West African country has Dakar as it’s capital

city?20. What is the upper house in a bicameral legislature

called?

Answers: 1. Sciatica 2. Scotland 3. Screw 4. Scribe 5. Scrimmage 6. Schrooge 7. Sculputre 8. Seal 9. Seashore 10. Seattle 11. Secondary School 12. Secessionist 13. Second 14. Secretary-general 15. Seder 16. Seismology 17. Self-aggrandizement 18. Seminoles 19. Senegal 20. Senate

Page 5: Issue 748

Tidbits®ofDouglasCounty BusinessDirectory5ForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS (continued):

B u s i n e s s D i r e c t o r yOf Douglas County

Castle Rock & Southern Areas

AttorneysMorse & Associates........................................303-300-6684www.MorseBankruptcy.com

Basement FinishingSeller Construction, Inc..................................303-514-7701www.SellerConstruction.com

Cat SpecialistsThe Cat Specialist...........................................303-663-2287612 Atchison Way, Castle Rock

ChurchesCenter for Spiritual Living..............................720-851-02652301 Woodlands Blvd, Castle RockFaith Life Fellowship......................................303-688-188817 S. Gilbert St, Castle Rock

Diesel Repair ShopDouglas County Diesel...................................303-660-99861221 Caprice Dr, Castle Rock

Environmental ServicesAAMREX.......................................................303-883-3750

Farm & Ranch SupplyCircle B Farm & Ranch...................................719-481-6161773-B Hwy 105 Palmer LakeHayCo.............................................................719-339-3525

FlooringDavinci Flooring.............................................720-232-4498www.DavinciFlooringinc.net

GuttersJPE Contractors...............................................303-663-8118200 S Wilcox St., Castle Rock

Hydroponics StoresBig Bloomz Hydro..........................................303-688-05991011 Caprice Dr, Castle Rock

Natural Wellness PharmaciesITC Compounding...........................................303-663-4224651 Topeka Way #600, Castle Rock

Trailer salesTopar Trailers..................................................719-749-239314185 US Hwy 24, Peyton

TransmissionH&M Transmission.........................................303-663-5578500 2nd St., Castle Rock

Youth SportsDC Dolphins Basketball, Baseball, Cheer, Football, Soft-ball, Volleyball................................................303-688-4011www.DC-Dolphins.org

Parker & Franktown Areas

BanksChampion Bank..............................................303-840-848416790 Centre Ct, Parker

Cabinetry & Kitchen’sBrin Custom Cabinets....................................303-688-6743Cell.................................................................303-304-6838

Cash for Cars & TrucksChunky’s Towing............................................720-560-6763

ComputersOnsite Computer..............................................303-909-3553Customepc@gmail.com

ConcreteConcrete Mike................................................303-840-7347

Diesel Repair ShopDiesel Repair and Performance......................303-841-65276250 E Pine Lane, Parker

Field MowingAlmar Farms...................................................303-805-9469

FirewoodFranktown Firewood.......................................303-660-0072

GymnasticsA+ Athletics....................................................303-953-73207104 S Dillon Ct, Centennial

Horse Riding LessonsPony Play........................................................720-851-4925

Jewelry StoresPinetree Jewelers.............................................303-841-266611028 S Pikes Peak Dr, Parker

Natural Wellness PharmaciesBrown’s Compounding....................................303-805-954310259 S Parker Rd., Parker

Real EstateKeller Williams, Pius Schenker.......................303-921-1749www.piusrealestate.comRemax, Jace Glick...........................................303-805-4333jacecanhelp.com

RestaurantsHeidi’s Deli.....................................................720-851-998610233 S Parker Rd #101, Parker

StuccoRT Stucco........................................................719-632-9000StuccoOverSiding@yahoo.com

TransmissionsAll Seasons Discount Transmission................720-353-027410270 S Dransfeldt Rd, Parker

I-25

E. Union Ave

Belleview Ave

XU

lster S

t

DT

C B

lvd

erages 25 years, making it the longest-lived bird, George the Goose of Thornton, England, lived to be nearly 50 years old. Speckle the Goose of Goshen, Ohio, is noted for laying the world’s heaviest egg. It was 24 ounces, twice as weighty as the average goose egg.

• In order for it to be made into jewelry, other met-als must be added to gold, creating an “alloy.” If your ring is 18-karat gold, it is 18 parts pure gold and six parts other metals.

• Nevada is the leading gold-mining state in Amer-ica, producing 79 percent of the nation’s supply. South Africa leads the world. It takes more than two tons of South African rock to yield less than one ounce of gold.

• It’s believed that the calling bird in the song is actually the mockingbird, a bird with the ability to imitate the sounds of other birds. One such bird was heard to imitate the songs of 32 different birds dur-ing a 10-minute period.

• Can you identify the famous family who lived at 1313 Mockingbird Lane? It was television’s Her-man Munster family — Herman, Lily, Grandpa and Eddie.• A hen begins laying eggs when she is about 20 weeks old. If a farmer uses artificial lighting, the hen will begin laying at a younger age. If she is ex-posed to about 15 hours of light per day, she will lay more eggs. The average hen lays about 250 eggs in a year.

• A member of the pigeon family, a turtledove is noted for its purring coo. It differs from the mourn-ing dove, although the two are often mistaken. Don’t look for turtledoves in America, as they live mainly in Europe, Asia and Africa. • The Turtledove Folk Club of Coatesville, Penn-sylvania, is an organization for music lovers, spe-cifically those who want to preserve and promote folk music and dance.• A partridge is most generally known as a quail or a bobwhite. There are about 150 varieties of par-tridges. Some parts of America refer to a partridge as a ruffed grouse. If you plan to keep a partridge as a pet, have plenty of grains, plant shoots and in-sects on hand. A typical bobwhite might consume as many 15,000 weed seeds a day, a tremendous help to farmers. • If someone offers you a Comice, Seckel, Winter Nelis, Kieffer, Leconte, Anjou, Bosc or Garber, he is offering you an item obtained from a pear tree. Over 800,000 tons of pears are produced annually in the United States, with the state of Washington leading the nation in fresh pear production. The av-erage American eats about 3.1 pounds of fresh pears a year.

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Page 6: Issue 748

6 Tidbits®ofDouglasCounty TheGemAdvisorForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

www.TheChampionBank.com

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Banking the way it used to be...

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The Gem Advisor

Scott McQueen

Agate

Scott McQueen is the owner of Pinetree Jewelers, Parker’s oldest jewelry store established in 1976. It is located at 11028 S. Pikes Peak Drive in Parker. For more information on gemstones or jewelry of any kind call 303.841.2666

Agate is varied and beautiful. There are several types of agate: Cyclops agate is a Mexican agate showing only a single eye. Moss agate has colors and filaments sugges-tive of vegetable growth. Dendritic agates have fern like patterns in them. Turritella agate is formed from silicified fossil Turritella (snail) shells. Agatized coral is in essence petrified cora often referred to as Petoskey stone. Certain stones when viewed in thin sections using transmitted light show a lovely diffraction spectrum caused by the extreme delicacy of the successive bands. They are called rainbow agates. Sometimes agate coexists with layers of masses of opal, jasper or crystalline quartz. Other forms of agate include carnelian agate, faceted Botswana agate, Greek agate, Brazilian agate, Ellensburg blue agate, blue lace agate, plume agates, Mexican crazy-lace agate, and much more. You’ll find agate used in pins, brooches, paper knives, inkstands, marbles and seals. Agate is also used to make mortars and pestles used by pharmacists to crush and mix chemicals. It is also used for leather burnishing tools.

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Page 7: Issue 748

Christmas Recipes and Snack Ideas

At this time of the year it’s normally the excess snacks and treats that cause most damage to our waistline! Tis the season! Constantly picking at potato chips, chocolates, and drinking alcohol can add more than 1,000 calories per day; and once this weight is piled on it becomes difficult to shift in the New Year.

Remember, everything in moderation! Here are a few healthier snack ideas to help you stay on track!

#1 You can make homemade Protein Bars that are quite appetizing for everyone to munch on!

Here’s what you’ll need :-½ C Xylitol Brown Sugar Blend (Ideal)-1 - 4 oz. jar baby food applesauce-2 tsp. ground cinnamon-1 ½ tsp. ground ginger-½ tsp. ground clove-1 tsp. baking powder-1 tsp. baking soda-½ tsp. salt-2 tsp. vanilla extract-4 large egg whites-1 - 15 oz. can of raw pumpkin-2 C oat flour-2 scoops vanilla whey protein-½ cup almond milk-½ C chopped walnuts (optional)Mix and bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes. #2 Enjoy some healthy Almond Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies

Here’s what you’ll need:-1 cup unsalted almond butter, stirred well -¾ cup Sucanat -1 large egg -½ tsp baking soda -¼ tsp sea salt -3 oz dark chocolate (70% cocoa or greater), broken into small pieces Stir together first five ingredients until blended and then stir in chocolate. Drop dough onto baking sheets bake for 10-12 minutes at 350.

#3 Bake your own chips and serve with homemade guacamole

Here’s what you’ll need: -Corn tortillas-Avocados (number depends on how many your serving) -Mrs. Dash Onion and Herb and/or Garlic and Herb seasonings -Sea Salt -Black Pepper -Garlic Salt-I Can’t Believe Its Not Butter Spray Cut your corn tortillas into 4 equal triangles. Place them on a baking sheet, spray lightly with butter spray and sprinkle with sea salt. Bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes or until crunchy and golden brown. For your guacamole smash your avocados and add sea salt, pepper, garlic salt and Mrs. Dash seasonings to taste!

Until next time. Yours in Health, Fitness & Happiness,

Please feel free to send questions or send comments to:[email protected]

Published by Permission of Jenny Lewis Enterprises, Inc. ® PO Box 3074 Parker, Co 80138All rights reserved 2011 © Jenny Lewis Fitness ®

Fitness Information Tidbits® of Douglas County 7 For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683

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It’s All About You... DENTISTRY!

5280MagazineTop DenverDentistsAward

Parker’s newest food and gift store! An ecclectic mix of handmade artisanal foods, Colorado Proud products and giftitems from local artists. With loads of unique seasonal items,organic foods, antiques and vintage items we o�er some-thing for everyone in our large easy to manuever store. Over40 vendors and growing!

Open Tuesday through Saturday from 11-619565 E Mainstreet, Parker

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303-653-1667Want to be vendor? Send and email to: [email protected] or call 303-653-1667

Page 8: Issue 748

8 Dental Information Tidbits® of Douglas County For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683

BOUTIQUE AND TEA ROOM

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For more information call: 303-994-9683

All I Want for Christmas Is My Eight Front Teeth

Is YOUR Smile “TIRED”? How important is your smile to that relationship, that business deal, and to how confident you feel? Look in the mirror – close up: Are they yellow, stained, gapped, worn, and “tired”?

Just say “NO” to “Tired Teeth” You can have the smile of your dreams - with NO shots, NO drilling, NO Pain and NO sensitivity; and if there’s no “drilling”, it’s reversible!

What are Lumineers? Ultrathin Lumineers are made of a beautiful, strong “white” porcelain. They are made thin, so they can fit over your own teeth and not make you look like one of our “equine” friend’s smile.

How many do I need? Typically, a nice, beautiful smile shows eight to ten teeth. My own Smile Makeover needed ten Lumineers. The first session took just a few minutes with a little polishing reshaping and an easy impression. Then at a second session, in about an hour, I got my new smile. It was easy - with NO shots, NO drilling, No pain, and NO sensitivity!

Don’t hide that smile. “Smile Confidently, Smile Out Loud – with Pain-free Lumineers”

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Please see our ad on page 7 of Tidbits

720-870-950010470 S Progress Way #100

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Dr Burgner

Of Douglas County ColoradoOf Douglas County Colorado

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Highlands Ranch, Colorado

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Top Ten Tips for saving money in today's economy...

Part 1 of 2One good outcome of the economic recovery is that peo-ple are becoming more careful with how they spend their money. For many of us, this means acquiring new financial habits. Here are our Top Ten Tips for stretching a dollar to-day. The first four are good overall things to do:

1. Create a budget. Drawing up a budget may not be any-one's favorite way to pass the time, but it sure pays off when it comes to saving money. You can't cut expenses without knowing what you have coming in and how it's going out. Making a budget instantly highlights the places where you might make some cuts. Without a budget, it's hard to keep saving money over a long period of time, because you don't see where your expenses may be going up.

2. Trim your debt. Credit cards are certainly convenient. But you want to minimize what you owe, as credit cards usually carry the highest interest rates. Watch what you spend with these cards--this is where that budget comes in--and make it a rule to pay off your outstanding balances each month. This can save you big money by eliminating those monthly interest charges.

3. Spend less. Review what you spend on everything, and look for opportunities to save money. For example, check with your phone company for cheaper rates and cellular calling plans. Think about cutting out newspaper delivery or magazine subscriptions you don't really need. Bring coffee to work in a thermos. Use the public library instead of buy-ing books and renting movies. These things all add up--and the more you look for opportunities to save, the more you'll uncover.

4. Save more. Get into the habit of regularly putting mon-ey away each week or each month. It doesn't matter how small the amount, you can always increase it once you find yourself with more on hand from your other money sav-ing efforts. Saving itself motivates you to keep at it, as you watch your nest egg grow. You might want to have a regular amount deducted from your paycheck and deposited directly into your savings account. Many people find this a painless way to quickly build up cash assets.

Always remember, little things can quickly add up to huge savings. And for savings relating to home financing or refi-nancing, please feel free to call or email us with any ques-tions. We’re always glad to talk.... Have a great day!

Tune in next week when we fol-low up with with the final 5 tips for saving money in today’s econ-omy.

Thurston RosenlundMortgage BankerPeoples Mortgage Corporation900 W. Castleton RoadSuite 150Castle Rock, CO 80109Office (303) 224-3476Fax (303) 224-3496

Page 9: Issue 748

Classified Page Tidbits® of Douglas For Advertising Call Tim (303)994-9683

Cindy Rose

This article was written by Edward Jones for use by your local Edward Jones Financial Advisor.Cindy Rose, Financial AdvisorEdward Jones2195 N Highway 83 #23 - Franktown, CO 80116303.688-2127 Member SIPC

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Please E-Mail Your Ad [email protected]

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WANTS TO purchase miner-als and other oil & gas interests. Send details to P.O. Box 13557,

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How to Cope With the "Threat of Longevity

You can’t predict how long you’ll live. Nonetheless, you still need to consider longevity as a key factor in creating, and following, a long-term investment strategy.

And your projected lifespan may be longer than you had thought.

Men who turned 65 in 2010 can expect to live anoth-er 18.6 years, while women who reached 65 that same year can anticipate another 20.7 years, according to the 2011 Social Security Trustees Report. And these figures are just averages; depending on your health and family history of longevity, you could well spend two, or even three, decades in retirement.

Possibly because people are now realizing they may have to support themselves for far longer than earlier generations did, they seem to be growing increasingly concerned about running out of money in their later years. In fact, in a poll of people ages 44 to 75, spon-sored by Allianz Life Insurance, 61 percent said they fear depleting their assets more than they fear dying.

So, if you’re concerned about outliving your resources — or if you think that you may become one of those people — what steps should you take, both now and dur-ing your retirement? Here are a few ideas:

Keep investing. Put away as much money as you can afford for your retirement. Take advantage of tax-deferred accounts, such as your 401(k) and traditional IRA, or tax-free accounts, such as a Roth IRA. (Roth IRA earnings are tax-free provided you’ve had your ac-count at least five years and you don’t start taking with-drawals until you’re at least 59-1/2.) And keep invest-ing, year in and year out, despite the inevitable market volatility you’ll encounter along the way. Re-assess your retirement age. If you enjoy your work, you might consider staying at your job a few years later than originally intended. Those extra years of income, not to mention extra contributions to your 401(k) and potentially bigger Social Security payouts, can make a big difference to your retirement lifestyle. Delay taking Social Security. As the laws now stand, you can start taking Social Security as young as 62, but your monthly checks will be bigger when you reach your “full” retirement age. You’ll get your biggest monthly Social Security checks if you wait until age 70, when they “max out,” but many people feel that waiting that long may not be worth it, when weighing the lost years of any payments against the unknown variable of life expectancy. Calculate your “withdrawal rate.” Once you retire, it’s essential that you know how much can withdraw each year from your investments without running out of mon-ey. Your withdrawal rate depends on a variety of factors, including your age, size of portfolio, risk tolerance and retirement lifestyle. A financial professional can help you calculate your initial withdrawal rate and adjust it as time goes on.

The possibility of outliving your resources is not a pleas-ant thought. But by taking the steps described above, as well as others, you can go a long way toward taking the fear out of longevity, leaving you free to fully enjoy an active retirement.

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Page 10: Issue 748

10Church information Tidbits of Douglas CountyForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

Chris Sutley, Senior PastorFaith Life Fellowship303-688-1888csutley@faithlifedenver.orgWWW.FaithLifeDenver.Org

17 S Gilbert Street ∙ Castle Rock

I-25

Wilcox

Hwy 86 S Gilbert

www.faithlifedenver.org

303-688-188817 S Gilbert Street ∙ Castle Rock

We are a growing “Word of Faith” ChurchChristmas Eve Services

5pm & 7pmChild Care& Ministry

Family Christmas Eve CandelightService

Join us for a time ofspiritual deepening

with Christmas Music,Words of Inspiration, and

Candle Lighting.

After the service, SANTAwill arrive to share in the

festivities.

We invite you to “BE the Light” on Christmas Eve

Sunday Services 10 a.m.No Service December 25Castle Rock Recreation Center

2301 Woodlands BlvdCastle Rock CO 80104720-851-0265OurCenterforSpiritualLiving.org

Saturday, December 24, 2011 12 Noon

Churches and Non-Profit Organizations...Advertise for only$15 per WEEK!!!For details call,

Tidbits of Douglas County

[email protected]

Douglas/Elbert Task Force 1638 Park St.

Castle Rock, CO 80109 303-688-6129

Donate a box of birthday cake mix and receive a 20% discount with this ad

GOOD Dec. 2011. Discount not valid on sale items.

Tidbits of Douglas County

Tim Mundy Owner/Publisher

[email protected]

Published Weekly by:AdsRus, LLC

P.O. Box 4423Parker, CO 80134

Tel (303)994-9683

Send copies or materials to:

1 Corinthians 15:57 (KJV) But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Is there victory to be had in thanking God? The answer is absolutely yes! No matter what you facing today, no matter what problem you are dealing with, no matter the trial or the tribulation that you are facing, you can thank God and thank your way out of it! This is not Sunday morning Preacher hype, not just motivating rhetoric, this is the Bible truth. You don’t even have to understand it, you don’t have to know how or why it works, you can just start thanking God…..And someone might ask, you mean thanking God for my sickness?....no! Thanking God for my poverty and my lack?....no! Thanking God for my pink slip and my foreclosure notice?....no! No, God is not the thief, God is not the one who steals, God is not the one who destroys, He is not the killer, He is not the destroyer! No matter what you are facing, no matter what has come against you, you can thank God for the answer!Someone say, “Thank God for the answer!” In advance, before you see it, before you feel it, before you can tell any difference of any kind, begin to thank God. And whether you see it or feel it, you are already on your way out, is that good news today or what? Could you thank God for enough money to pay off all your bills, all your debts and not have a single idea how it might happen? The good news is that you do not have to know how to have faith.This is the very essence of what faith is, the substance, the evidence of things not seen yet! God, thank you for making my heart whole and sound. God thank you that every trace of cancer is leaving my body, God thank you that I have more money than I need to support myself and I can give into every good work. God thank you for setting me free from smoking, God thank you for setting me free from drinking, God thank you for setting me free from every bondage in my life!The Bible tells us that we are to act and to imitate our father in the faith Abraham, who called those things which be not as though they were! Faith is calling things which be not as though they are already there! Abram changed his name to Abraham which means the father of many nations while he was still childless! Every time he meet someone he would say, hello my name is Abraham, the father of many nations! Father of many nations? Are you kidding me? Says who? Says faith! He believed he would have children as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the sea shore, how did he get that way? Abraham was fully persuaded, giving glory to God, that what he had promised, he was also able to do! And a big part of giving God glory is giving Him thanks!

Empty Nesters: FREE Special Report Re-veals 9 Costly

Mistakes to Avoid When Selling Your Home

Douglas County - Are you an “Empty Nester” who needs a home for the future? Is it time to downsize or to move into another home more suitable for your glorious retirement years?

Like thousands of residents in our area, you may be discovering that after years of non-stop child traffic in and out of your doors, toys on the floor, music floating throughout, suddenly you can hear a pin drop over the quiet hum of the refrigerator. And what that means is that there are many wonderful opportunities for you to create this new chapter in your life.

To help you understand the issues involved in making such a move, and how to avoid the 9 most common and costly mistakes most Empty Nesters make, a new report called “Empty Nester: How to Sell the Place You Call Home” has been prepared which identifies these issues, and shows you how to steer clear of the mis-takes that could cost you literally thousands of dollars.

To order a FREE Special Report, hear a brief recorded message about how to order your FREE copy of this re-port call toll-free 1-888-327-7517 and enter 1013. You can call any time, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Page 11: Issue 748

MomentsinTime Tidbits®ofDouglasCounty11ForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

Timothy G Brown, Agent734 Wilcox Street #100Castle Rock, CO 80104(720) 733-2584www.timothybrownagency.com

All your protection under one roof.

American Family Mutual Insurance Company and its SubsidiariesAmerican Family Insurance Company

Home O�ce — Madison, WI 53783amfam.com

© 2009 07497 — Rev. 2/09

Douglas County Sheriff Dave Weaver Needs Your Help

FUGITIVE OF THE WEEKName: MISTYSAILAS 30 Yrs OldBrown Hair, Brown Eyes5’7” - 160 lbs.Last Known Address: Littleton, COCharges: FELONY THEFT

TAKE NO ACTION TO APPREHEND THIS PERSON YOURSELF

To provide information and remain anonymous, call the Douglas County Sheriff’s Office Tips Hotline: 303.660.7579 or E-mail us at [email protected].

For immediate action call 303.660.7500 or call your local law enforcement

¥ On Jan. 5, 1643, in the first record of a legal divorce in the American colonies, Anne Clarke of the Massachusetts Bay Col-ony is granted a divorce from her absent and adulterous hus-band, Denis Clarke, by the Quarter Court of Boston.

¥ On Jan. 7, 1785, Frenchman Jean-Pierre Blanchard and American John Jeffries travel from Dover, England, to Calais, France, in a gas balloon, making the first crossing of the English Channel by air. After almost crashing, the two men were forced to throw nearly everything out of the balloon to lighten the ship.

¥ On Jan. 4, 1847, Samuel Colt rescues the future of his fal-tering gun company by winning a contract to provide the U.S. government with 1,000 of his .44 caliber revolvers. Though never cheap, by the early 1850s, Colt revolvers were inexpen-sive enough to be a favorite with Americans headed westward during the California Gold Rush.

¥ On Jan 8, 1877, Crazy Horse and his warriors -- outnumbered, low on ammunition and forced to use outdated weapons -- fight their final losing battle against the U.S. Cavalry in Montana. On May 6, Crazy Horse led approximately 1,100 Indians to the Red Cloud reservation near Nebraska’s Fort Robinson and sur-rendered.

¥ On Jan. 6, 1925, in Madison Square Garden, Finnish long-distance runner Paavo Nurmi sets a new indoor world record, running a mile in 4:13.5. In the 5,000-meter race, the “Flying Finn” broke another indoor world record in 14:44.6. Nurmi of-ten ran holding a stopwatch to pace himself, an innovation he developed.

¥ On Jan. 3, 1961, President Dwight Eisenhower closes the American embassy in Havana and severs diplomatic relations between the United States and Fidel Castro’s government in Cuba. The action signaled that the United States was prepared to take extreme measures to oppose Castro’s regime.

¥ On Jan. 2, 1971, 66 football (soccer) fans are killed in a stam-pede at a stadium in Glasgow, Scotland, as they attempt to leave a game. The tragedy was caused by the crush of spectators all leaving at the same time on the same stairway.

Of Douglas County Of Douglas County

READER(S) of the

WEEK!

SarahFrom Parker, CO

Each Week, Tidbits of Douglas County catches readers with our paper. We will take a picture of them and place them in our Reader of the Week. Could you be next?

Join these other successful businessesby placing an ad in Tidbits!Call 303.994.9683

www.ILoveTidbits.com

REALTY

Swiss efficiency and ex-ecutive professionalism

helping you find the prop-erty of your dreams or sell your property for the best

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Page 12: Issue 748

LaughLines Tidbits®ofDouglasCounty12

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Complete Service, Brakes, TransmissionSuspension, Gas Engines, Rear End

6250 E. Pine LaneParker, CO 80138

303.841.6527FREE Diagnostics with Repair!

Mon-Fri 8-5Sat 8 - 12

Diesel Repair &PerformanceDieselRepairParker.com

ForAdvertisingCallTim(303)994-9683

MORTGAGE RATES ARE ATHISTORIC LOWS

Specializing in Home Purchase andRefinance Loans

Contact me today to obtain a FREE analysis of your current mortgage situation, or toget Pre-Approved on your next home purchase.

Thurston RosenlundSenior Mortgage Banker

NMLS: 268617

GREAT RATES ∙ LOCAL UNDERWRITING ∙ INTEGRITY ∙ TRUST900 W. Castleton Rd ∙ Suite 150 ∙ Castle Rock, CO 80109Direct 303.224.3476 · Cell 720.373.5407 · [email protected]/thurston

www.milehigholistics.com

Safeway

Mile High Holistics I-25Hwy 105

Monument

County Line

Woodmoor Exit 161

McDonalds

Mile High Holistics

Proudly Serving Douglas, Elbert and El Paso Counties

10-7 DailyHOURS:

20+ Strains, fresh edibles, tinctures,tonics, earwax, peanut butter, candy

and much much more!

(719)487-0901626 Hwy 105

Palmer Lake, CO 80133

Laugh Lines!

Exo ic TansFormally Executive Tans

9321 E Lincoln Ave #200Lonetree, CO

At the intersection of Yosemite &Lincoln, next to Heritage Liquor Store.

NOW OPEN UNDER NEW MANAGMENT

Honoring all prior minutesfrom Executive Tans through

December, 2011!

M-F 8-7Sat 10-4

Sun 10-3

SNIFFER A man had just Boarded and settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his Black Labrador in the middle seat next to the man. The first man looked very quizzically at the dog and asked why the dog was allowed on the plane. The second man explained that he was from the Police Drugs Enforcement Agency and that the dog was a 'sniff-ing dog'.'His name is Sniffer and he's the best there is. I'll show you once we get airborne, when I put him to work.' The plane took off, and once it has leveled out, the Po-liceman said, 'Watch this.' He told Sniffer to 'search'. Sniffer jumped down, walked along the aisle, and finally sat very purposefully next to a woman for several sec-onds. Sniffer then returned to his seat and put one paw on the policeman's arm. The Policeman said, 'Good boy', and he turned to theman and said, 'That woman is in possession of marijuana, I'm making a note of her seat number and the authorities will apprehend her when we land. 'Gee, that's pretty good,' replied the first man. Once again, the Policeman sent Sniffer to search the aisles. The Lab sniffed about, sat down beside a man for a few seconds, returned to its seat, and this time he placed two paws on the agent's arm. The Policeman said, 'Two paws mean that man is car-rying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note of his seat number for the police.' 'I like it!' said his seat mate. The Policeman then told Sniffer to 'search' again. Sniffer walked up and down the aisles for a little while, sat down for a moment, and then came racing back to the agent, jumped into the middle seat and proceeded to defacate all over the place. The first man was really disgusted by this behaviour and couldn't figure out how or why a well-trained dog would behave like that. So he asked the Policeman, 'What's going on?' The Policeman nervously replied, 'He's just found a bomb.'

CONGRESS

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington DC . Nothing was moving.

Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's go-ing on?"

“Terrorists have kidnapped Congress, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are go-ing to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, collecting donations."

"How much is everyone giving, on average?" the driver asks. The man replies, "Roughly a gallon."